Live Your Extraordinary Life With Michelle Rios

Finding Joy in Holiday Chaos with Michelle Rios

Michelle Rios

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Feeling overwhelmed as the holidays approach? You’re not alone. In this week’s episode of Live Your Extraordinary Life, we’re getting real about the stress, disappointment, and chaos that often creep in during what’s supposed to be “the most wonderful time of the year.” Whether you’re juggling endless to-do lists, grieving a loved one, or quietly disappointed with how 2024 played out, this episode is for you.

Join me as we unpack why overwhelm happens, how societal expectations add fuel to the fire, and—most importantly—what you can do to reclaim your joy and peace. With a mix of heartfelt honesty, practical tools, and humor (because let’s face it, laughter is a survival skill), I’ll help you navigate this season with grace, boundaries, and a reminder that you are enough—just as you are.

So, take a deep breath, grab a cup of cocoa (or wine, no judgment), and let’s focus on what really matters this holiday season. You’ve got this.

Highlights from this episode:

  • Why the holidays feel overwhelming (and how to reframe it).
  • Permission to drop the ball and skip the perfection.
  • Simple, calming tools like box breathing and gratitude practices.
  • A heartfelt moment to honor yourself, your journey, and the beauty of contrasts in life.

Listen now and give yourself the gift of peace this holiday season. 🎄✨

WAYS TO CONNECT WITH ME:

Speaker 1:

Hello everyone and welcome back to another episode of the Live your Extraordinary Life podcast. I'm your host, michelle Rios, and today we're talking about managing overwhelm during the holidays. This is a little deviation from our typical lineup of interviews and what we've been talking about lately, which is really about growing financially and wealth creation and leaning into that next chapter of our lives. Instead, I want to just recognize and address the elephant in the room. It's a week before Christmas and some of you, you're barely holding it together, I know because I feel you Between work deadlines, gift shopping, money woes, holiday parties, add in family illnesses, college application processes, all the things. And God help you. If you are a parent of a young child and you are trying to figure out where on earth today to put the darn elf on the shelf, or you are tracking down one of those toys your kid must have and Santa apparently has supply chain issues, I know you're probably standing there asking yourself who on earth signed me up for this chaos, seriously. So let me just say this If you're feeling stressed, overwhelmed, exhausted or even on the verge of your own personal holiday meltdown, you, my friend, are not alone. You are not alone.

Speaker 1:

A lot of people are feeling the same way, and here's where we're going to get real. Some of you are not doing very well right now not physically, not emotionally and not spiritually. I know because I hear from so many of you week to week. I know some of you are worried about money. You're running businesses that aren't yet profitable. You're in jobs that don't quite allow you to manage all the bills successfully on your own. Some of you are really trying to figure out how to get creative and give your families good Christmases. I know some of you are dealing with grief. You've lost loved ones, you're missing someone who isn't here this year and you're feeling that ache a little deeper during the holiday season. And I know some of you are dealing with health issues unknowns whether they're your health issues or your loved ones. It's costing you sleep. And I know there are those of you who are just plain disappointed, disappointed because 2024 didn't go as planned. You know you didn't start the business or, if you did, you didn't launch the course or write the book or get the promotion or find the new job or lose the weight or find the love of your life or, whatever it is, restore your marriage. You didn't come through this year, becoming the new you you had intended to be. That's okay. Here's where I remind you.

Speaker 1:

The podcast here is about telling the truth. That's what we're talking about in this podcast authenticity. So let me say this it's okay to feel like life isn't going the way you want. You're human, you're real. So right here, right now, I want you to sit back, take a deep breath and let it all go for a moment. I want you to know I see you. I see you, and what I want you to do is I want you to let go of the guilt, the heartbreak, the frustration and the overwhelm just for a little while. Let's spend the next 20 minutes laughing, maybe crying. If you've got to get it out, let it out and reminding ourselves of what really matters this holiday season, because the holidays aren't about the sprint to the finish line, they aren't about perfection. They're about connection with yourself, your loved ones and with God, the universe or your higher power.

Speaker 1:

So let's start by understanding what overwhelm even feels like. If you're going through it, you already know, but just in case, overwhelm is like being the CEO of a struggling startup called your Life Inc. You're managing 19 departments, none of them are profitable and HR is about to quit and your boss, aka you, is a real pain in the ass because your boss has you working late on multiple fronts. You're tired, you're hungry and you just want to go to bed. It's that feeling of juggling a thousand things while you're still wondering if you're enough. Overwhelm is like it's trying to show up as a perfect parent, partner, employee and friend, while somehow making it all look effortless. But let's be real. This is not a Hallmark movie. This is real life and in real life, the cookies burn, people lose jobs, dogs eat the gingerbread house, someone in your house is crying, and it's probably you.

Speaker 1:

So why do we get overwhelmed exactly? It comes from a mismatch between our expectations and reality. We expect ourselves to be Wonder Woman, but let's face it even Wonder Woman didn't have to deal with all of this. She didn't have to host potlucks on top of grief and on top of all these deadlines, and wrap 27 presents and go out and find all the presents and clean up the house and do the dishes and the laundry and figure out how she's going to show up the next day and be presentable at work.

Speaker 1:

This season comes with a heap of social pressure to boot. We're bombarded with Instagram, perfect images that make us feel like our lives don't measure up. But let me let you in on a little secret. Nobody's life looks like their social media feed, not even the people posting it, and it all takes an emotional toil and it all takes an emotional toll. Here's the part no one talks about. Overwhelm doesn't just make you tired, it makes you resentful Resentful of your to-do list, the season and sometimes even the people you love the most. Overwhelm robs you of joy. You're so busy doing all the things that you forget to feel the things that matter. So let's stop right now and shift the mindset away from overwhelm. Okay, number one if we drop the ball, we're gonna own it.

Speaker 1:

Here's your holiday permission slip. You don't have to do it all. Burn the cookies, go pick some up at the grocery store. Forget to send a holiday card this year? Oh well, blame it on the post office. Seriously, nobody is handing out awards for the most exhausted human at Christmas, and if they are, guess what? You don't want to win that one.

Speaker 1:

Number two boundaries. Boundaries are a gift. Every time you say yes to something, you're actually saying no to something else, and usually it's your peace of mind. So I want you to say no this week. Say it with love, but say it with confidence, and then pour yourself a drink eggnog, tea, wine, hot cocoa, your call. And if someone's upset because you're not hosting Christmas dinner or there's not going to be X, Y and Z under the tree, oh well, protect your peace. Oh well, protect your peace. Number three we're going to laugh and then let things go. When things go wrong and they will, trust me, find the humor in it Burn the turkey, huh. Order some pizza, forget the batteries. Well, congratulations, you just taught your kids about patience. They could probably use a little bit of adversity. Humor is your holiday survival tool. Use it liberally. So last year I have to tell you this story Last year, christmas Eve, my husband and I decided we were going to order Christmas Eve dinner from this beautiful Peruvian restaurant that does amazing food, and we were just going to take some of the stress out of our lives because we were super busy and we didn't really want to cook that night.

Speaker 1:

So we ordered this beautiful meal and we just had to pick it up at five o'clock. People were going to be there at 5.30. We'd be eating by six. We had it all planned eating by six. We had it all planned. So here's the problem when we went to get the food at the restaurant, the lights were out, the doors were locked, nobody was answering the phone and we were there at five o'clock on the dot. So apparently we found out later they forgot about our order or somebody lost it and they let their employees go home a half hour early. So there was no food for our dinner gathering.

Speaker 1:

And it wasn't just my immediate family. We had my in-laws and my husband's siblings with us as well. So here we have all these folks arriving at our house. We have no food and the stores are on the verge of closing. It's now like quarter of six and they're closing at six. We did not have time to run out and buy food.

Speaker 1:

So here we were Christmas Eve a house full of people and no food. We just looked at each other going oh my gosh, this is like Mother Hubbard's bear cupboards. We had like the equivalent of what would have been served at Charlie Brown's Thanksgiving feast Popcorn, I think. We had like Smart Pop or Skinny Pop, popcorn, white rice and bread to make toast. I mean, we had nothing. It was embarrassing in the beginning, but it was actually hysterical. It was just so ridiculous, like how could this be what's happening and unfolding in real time and there was just nothing we could do about it. It was what it was. So we got a good chuckle out of it and we just poured more wine. It was fine. I mean, definitely one of the more memorable Christmas Eves, not because the food was so good, but because it was so bad. We just got a big laugh out of it. It is what it is.

Speaker 1:

So I just want to encourage you to use laughter. Recognize that things are not going to go perfectly, they're not going to go smoothly. Try to find the humor in it. I know some things are not laughable, right? People get sick this time of year. People are losing jobs this time of year. There's a lot of heavy stuff going on. So I'm not necessarily saying laugh at that, but I am saying try to relax into what's happening and recognize that it is just this moment. It does not define your life, it does not mean the end of the world. It just means there's a hard moment that you're going through. And now I want to give you some practical tools for recentering, because it's so important when we are going full tilt out there, trying to do all the things that I'm hoping you're going to slow down around, to really come back to center, to come back to yourself, to not get so far outside of yourself that you're not experiencing life calmly and peacefully.

Speaker 1:

So when stress hits, we're going to start number one with box breathing. It's something that's super simple, you can do anywhere and all it requires is that you inhale in for four counts, hold for four, exhale for four and then hold for four counts again. That's why they call it box breathing. So you literally inhale. So you literally inhale four counts, hold at the top for four. One, two, three, four. Exhale for four counts and then hold at the end for four. One, two, three, four. I'm telling you, it's like hitting the reset button on your nervous system. Do that five to 10 times nervous system. Do that five to 10 times Box steps four counts in, four counts, hold at the top, exhale four counts out and then hold it again at the end. You're going to feel so much better. Number two we're going to do gratitude with a twist.

Speaker 1:

I want you, during these busy days, to take a few minutes. Maybe it's when you're having your morning coffee, maybe it's late at night when everyone's gone to bed. I want you to just write down. You can use your phone. You don't even have to get a pen and paper if you don't have it. Use your phone. Everyone has a phone.

Speaker 1:

Write down three things you're grateful for today. Not the same three that you always put down at Thanksgiving, like your spouse and your kids and your house. Those are great. But I want you to talk about three things you're grateful for in that day Sometimes they're just about things that didn't go wrong or the things that just went right and write down three things you're grateful for hey, they had what I needed at the store. Hey, nobody called to complain today. Something simple. I love it when there are no call. I mean, I love getting calls, but I really love it when there are no calls, because no good news is good news. And also, I want you to find one thing that you're going to let go of. So, three things you're grateful for today and one thing you're gonna let go of. So I'm gonna tell you one thing I'm letting go of.

Speaker 1:

This year we didn't get around to doing a family Christmas card. This year We've been busy and I've been building a business. My husband has his own business and is working around the clock as well, our son's applying for college. It's been a very busy year. We did not get a photo of the three of us that we felt really good about to put on a Christmas card, and so we just said you know what? We're not doing it this year. We're just not doing it. We're going to wish everyone a Merry Christmas. We're going to call the folks that aren't nearby and we're going to let go of that need to have a family Christmas card out. Just let it go. So find one thing that you're going to let go of. So for us, it was the need to be perfect and we are going to be guilt-free about skipping that tradition of sending out a holiday card. Find what you're going to let go of. Elsa was on to something right. That movie, frozen All right, number three.

Speaker 1:

Instead of a to-do list, I want you to write a done list. Okay. Instead of focusing on all the things left to do and making yourself crazy, I want you to work in reverse. Make a list of what you've already accomplished, if it's small got out of bed. Check. Made coffee. Check. Threw in a load of laundry. Check. Didn't spill my coffee. Check, check. Sometimes that's enough. Just get some momentum under your belt. We drive ourselves crazy with those never-ending to-do lists and we keep adding more things on them, so start with a done list. What have you already done? You already found that gift for grandma, great check. You already figured out that your kids did all their college applications? Check, check, check. That in our household right now is gold, okay.

Speaker 1:

Next, I want us to take a few moments of reflection and gratitude. All right, so we're going to just pause. Hopefully you're not driving. If you are, keep your eyes on the road, but if you are not, I want you to close your eyes and take a deep breath. Deep breath in, inhale gratitude and exhale stress. We're going to inhale gratitude and we're going to exhale stress, and I want you to thank yourself for showing up, for trying, for doing your best even when it didn't feel like enough, for doing your best even when it didn't feel like enough. Thank yourself for being human. And then I want you to thank God, the universe or whatever higher power you believe in. Thank them for this messy, complicated, beautiful life, for the light and the dark, the joy and the pain, because the contrast is what makes life extraordinary.

Speaker 1:

If you're in a tough season right now and I know many of you are know that it's just that a season. Better days are ahead. Joy is coming, relief is coming. You're not stuck, you're in motion. You might be going slow, but that's okay. You're not a failure. You're not over Unless you quit, which you are not doing. You are still in the game, this game of life, which can throw some real curveballs our way.

Speaker 1:

But our lives are extraordinary, even in the hard moments, and I don't want you to forget that. Remember that the dark means that the light is coming All right. The sadness means joy is around the corner. These opposites can't exist in absolutes. They need each other. So if you're feeling pain, know that joy is coming. If you're in dark, light is around the corner. That's what makes life extraordinary. So, as we head into this final stretch before Christmas, I want you to remember this you are enough. You are enough Not because of what you've accomplished, but because of who you are, Because you're here. The chances of you being here are one in many billion, and yet are here and we are better because you are here.

Speaker 1:

The holidays aren't about doing all the things. Please remember that. They're about being with the people and in the moments that matter. So laugh when it gets messy, cry if you need to, but let yourself feel it all. That is what being human is all about. That is what having an extraordinary life is all about. It is not about perfect sunsets and rainbows and unicorns. It is highs and lows, peaks and valleys, pain and joy okay, love and loss. That is what having a full and extraordinary life is all about. All right, I want to thank you for taking the time out of your schedule to spend it with me. I know there's a lot going on, but I'd be remiss in not telling you and not reminding you that you are extraordinary and I am so grateful that you are here and on this journey with me. I'll see you next week for a very special Christmas Eve episode. Until then, take care of yourself, maybe even hide a few Christmas cookies for yourself. You deserve it. It's okay, all right. Until next time, go and live your extraordinary life.

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