Made for More
Made for More
Kallup McCoy: Overcoming Addiction, Running for Redemption, and Embracing Faith
This will be one of the most inspirational, raw, and motivating podcasts episodes you will listen to!
Kallup McCoy, a man who has defied the odds and turned his past into inspiration for others. Kallup shares candid recollections of his troubled upbringing with substance abuse and domestic violence, revealing how sports provided a temporary escape, yet the pull of drugs led him down a dark path that almost destroyed his athletic dreams.
This conversation gets very vulnerable and personal as Kallup opens up about his cycle of addiction, how it impacted his relationships, and some moments of divine intervention. This raw narrative highlights his battle with addiction and the guilt he carried, but also the enduring hope for redemption that never left him. Kallup's story reaches a pivotal moment during his time in jail, where a spiritual encounter ignited a period of self-improvement, fitness, and newfound faith, ultimately leading to his feature in Men's Health magazine.
Shoot Kallup a message if you are inspired by his story and be sure to follow him to keep up!
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Friends, hello, welcome to Made for More, the podcast. My name is Regan and I'm so excited that you are listening and especially to this episode. This is by far the most pure, raw, vulnerable conversation and podcast guest that I have ever had. Caleb McCoy is an incredible human. Caleb McCoy is an incredible human. Him and I connected on social media not too long ago and he has just been a ball of joy, a ball of light and such an inspiration to not only me but so many people in the community.
Speaker 1:Let me tell you that this will not be the last time that you hear him on my podcast. Um, his story is just incredible. I think we could have talked for probably over two hours, three hours with his story and his life and goals and what is to come for him. You guys are going to be so inspired by his story. He is an incredible human and just so real and so raw and it's incredible. I don't even have anything else to say. You're going to be blown away by this episode. Get ready, have your tissues ready, because you may cry a little bit, because his story is just wild and so hopeful. So let's just go ahead and get into it. Caleb, welcome to the podcast. Welcome to Made for More.
Speaker 2:Thank you, regan. I really appreciate you having me on and I'm looking forward to hopefully sharing something that's going to be helpful to somebody and inspiring, so I'm excited about this.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I like I love I think it's always good to have some sort of outline for a podcast, to kind of have something to talk about. But I just like love conversation like that's where people really enjoy and connect with podcasts when they see like, okay, you're a real person and you live life and you've had struggles and people can kind of connect, find some connections in your story and that's where people get inspired by it. So I just love like real vulnerable conversation. So I appreciate it Absolutely.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean, I think it. I think that we need more of that, especially just with the day and age that we live in. You know, we constantly see the highlights on Instagram and the snapshots of people's lives and everything, and and I think it's really important that we talk about our struggles, our failures, um, you know, our difficult circumstances that we're facing and everything, and I really believe that's the things that connect us the most.
Speaker 1:Yeah, instagram like it's so cliche. Instagram is such a highlight reel. But even when I think we know that Instagram is a highlight reel and we all show our best self or what we want people to see, um, I think it's so important to remember and like, find people that you connect with that are just, are real and are sharing real life. So absolutely.
Speaker 2:I mean, I I think that it's it's not about being perfect, it's about being human, and that's one of the things that. So we'll get into this in a minute but we got a nonprofit organization and one of the things that we're going to be doing with our employees is having mistakes, meetings and like talking about the things that we're struggling with and the things that we got wrong, and that way, everybody evens the playing field, and so that's like one of the things I love to talk about on these podcasts is like my struggles, my setbacks, my failures, and because I think we're all going to go through something. If we're not going through something currently and whenever you're vulnerable and you lead with that, that gives other people permission to be like oh my gosh, you're struggling with that too. I thought I was alone in that, and so, yeah, I think it's really important that we do that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, okay, tell me a little bit about the nonprofit, also for people listening. We just connected and realized that we live like an hour and a half from each other, from Greenville to North Carolina.
Speaker 2:So so, yeah, we're going to. We're going to be recording some content for y'all, hopefully in the future.
Speaker 1:But yeah, tell me about the nonprofit. What are you guys doing with that?
Speaker 2:So it's a called. It's called Res Hope Recovery and Consulting, and my wife and I, uh, we're both in recovery from meth and opioid addiction. We both struggled with meth and opioids numerous multiple substances for over 15 years, and when we got into recovery, I was locked up in 2017, which I'll get a little bit more into my story here in a few minutes but I this epiphany, I feel like God gave me this vision that, um, it was time to stop taking and stop destroying and and stop, um, you know, just inflicting pain. You know, hurt people, hurt people, and that's that's the person that I was for so long. And so God gave me this vision. Like you need to do something to give back to your community.
Speaker 2:As an indigenous community, we have a lot of intergenerational trauma, we have a lot of alcoholism, a lot of different things that challenge us, and so I wanted to be a light and I wanted to try to make an impact in my community instead of tearing it down like I did for so long.
Speaker 2:Wow, and so so what we're doing is opening up a men's transitional home, um, for men that are coming out of jail, rehab, prison.
Speaker 2:Maybe they're experiencing homelessness and they're wanting to work a program and they need to be in a safe place to heal, to grow, to live a life of recovery. And so, uh, that's what we're going to do. We've got the house, we're hiring staffing. We've been doing interviews the last few weeks, which is absolutely incredible because, reagan, I went from being a strung out drug addict, unemployable, couldn't be trusted, to now running an organization and hiring people, and it's just absolutely insane to think about, like, how far God has brought me, and so it's such a short amount of time. So we got this men's recovery house. We do things within our community. We do a Thanksgiving dinner, um, we've spoken in schools, uh, sharing our story. Um, we've been, uh, on different trips across the country mission trips and other indigenous communities and but our main focus right now is opening up this house and and providing a program and a safe place, place for men to grow and heal.
Speaker 1:Wow, 2017 to seven years ago. Like that's only. I mean, that's a god thing for sure, for sure.
Speaker 2:I mean, it's just, I've got god's fingerprints. You know these god winks all throughout my life, and so it's pretty incredible to see how far all the things I've got to experience where I was once at to where I'm at now. It's just night and day difference, as it should be.
Speaker 1:Did you ever like? If anyone would have told you in 2017 that you would have been like where you are now and successful, and like actually being able to help people through this, would you have believed them?
Speaker 2:I don't know. You know I'm not going to say no, because I was always. My dad told me before he passed away that I was going to come, I was going to beat my addiction and do incredible things for for our community, for my family and for the like. His exact words on his dying bed and you know so. I always. I always had leadership qualities when I was growing up and everything, but then I struggled with addiction for so long and that shame and disappointment and just not feeling like I was worth anything. So I guess it depended on the day that you asked me honestly, um, but I mean, it's just absolutely mind-boggling now to think back to where I was, to where I am now did um?
Speaker 1:was there ever like, was there a certain point in your addiction that you were like okay, this is like, this is the turning point, this is it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah. So I believe that for me, I think that God will put us on our backs in order. For us, the only way that we can look is up, you know, and that's that's what my life had become. So I'll get into my story a little bit. I started my, I was, I was thinking about this on my run yesterday and I'm still trying to process a lot of the trauma process, a lot, of, a lot of my life and a lot of things that I experienced. And I was on my run yesterday and I was thinking like how normalized I made the chaos in my with everything going on in my environment.
Speaker 2:Um, you know, growing up, seeing, seeing, uh, so much alcoholism, um, drug dealing, fighting, like that's. That's what I thought was the norm. You know, that's how I thought life was supposed to be. And so I remember I was telling, talking to Caitlin, my wife this morning we're just sharing some of our story with one another and I was like man I can't believe I'm smoking weed at 10 years old like I had a buddy who was 12. His stepdad used to deal weed and he would. He would go and get a handful of weed out of his, out of his sack and he was 12 years old. It'd be the summertime, you know, I was getting ready to go into whatever the sixth, seventh grade and, um, he'd be sitting on the porch and be sitting on the couch rolling a joint and it was, you know, it was game on all summer long. We were smoking weed, um, at 10, 11 years old, and I just thought I just seen that that happening around me and obviously I knew that I was supposed to be doing that at that age, but I thought that that's, that's what I was going to be doing later on in life and it just became so normalized to me. Um and so, when I was 11 years old, I started getting bad migraine headaches and I was taken to a neurologist and they prescribed or stayed all narcotic and honestly, reagan, it helped me to not think about the future.
Speaker 2:It helped me not think about the past. It helped me to live in the moment and to be comfortable in my own skin and to deal with a lot of the things that I was experiencing and with with life my mom and dad fighting, um, you know, domestic violence in the house. Like we, we were loved, but there was also a lot of that. My mom and dad had a toxic relationship. You know, we had clothes on our backs, we had a roof over our head, we had food in our belly, but at the same time, all these other things were going on that were really challenging my sister's, seven years older than me, and I'm seeing her sneaking out of the house, quitting school, getting into drugs, you know her hanging out with her friends and seeing them smoke weed and eventually start smoking crack, you know, and I'm seeing this stuff at 11 years old, and so when I get this narcotics prescribed to me, it helped me to just be comfortable, you know, and and and it helped me to have a false sense of, uh, identity.
Speaker 2:Um, we never, we were not a church going family, we faith was not something that was important, uh, and wasn't something that was talked about a lot. So I didn't have God in my life. Obviously, god had his hand on me this entire time, but I didn't know, I didn't have that relationship. And so I find sports during this time and that, honestly, has always been a saving grace in my life. That has always kept me on the straight and narrow and kept me out of trouble for the most part.
Speaker 2:And so, um, my mom finds out that I was abusing my, my medication, my prescribed medication and, uh, I started to, um, just get mixed up in the, in the party scene and everything at a young age, when I was like 13, 14 years old.
Speaker 2:Around the same time I found running and started playing different sports in middle school and high school and everything and won a conference championship when I was younger in middle school and cross country and got involved with football, basketball, track and I started doing good, started hanging out with a good group of friends and everything and kind of got out of the party scene for a while.
Speaker 2:And I was doing good for several years while I was in high school and then my junior year we were going to play a football game early in the season and one of my buddies had brought out a bag of meth and we're 16 years old and you know, I thought it was just like yellow jackets.
Speaker 2:I thought it was going to be something to just get us hyped up and he was like we're going to play like Superman, you know, like it's all good, and so we mixed it in our water bottles before the football game and we did that for half a season until finally, I thought I was going to have a heart attack before one of the football games and I even went to the trainer because my shoulder pads you could see them like they were bound, I mean they were just like expanding. My heart was felt like it was going to explode. I thought I was going to have a heart attack and that really scared me and so I stopped taking. I stopped taking the meth before the games and everything me. And so I stopped taking. I stopped taking the meth before the games and everything but, still, I got that taste of that I got.
Speaker 2:I loved the way that it made me feel and I went to take my SAT around the same time. I'd been up all night. We played the football game, right, I come back, come back home after partying and everything and stay up all night to go take my SAT on the next Saturday morning. And I remember taking my SAT and it's just how crazy my life was, just thinking back on it. I started, the math started wearing off during the SAT and I fell asleep so I bombed the SAT because I was doing math at 16 years old. Well, it starts to spiral out of control. I get mixed back in the party scene again and start failing some classes.
Speaker 2:My second semester, and I was a pretty good athlete. I had the opportunity to go play football at the next level or run track and I failed a class and I lost those scholarship opportunities and I got kicked off the team my senior year. So my identity lied in my sports and when I didn't have that anymore, I was mad, I was angry, I didn't know where to turn and so I just went right back to what I knew and went back to the thing that was helping me cope, although it was destroying me, although it was chaotic, that's what I was comfortable with, and so I barely graduate high school. I have my first son, hayden, at 19 years old, and then he and his mom me and his mom split up while she was pregnant, mom, me and his mom split up while she was pregnant. And then I got another woman pregnant and I had my second son almost a year to the day after Hayden was born, caleb Caleb III we call him BK, and I was not a presence in their lives and this is not something I talk a whole lot about in podcasts, but it's just, you know, naturally coming out right now and I think it's because I'm processing a little bit more and I can can I can give words to it a little bit better, but I started to.
Speaker 2:I was not able to be a presence in their life because of my addiction and hayden and I have never really had a relationship. You know he's going to App State right now. He's going to be a sophomore in college and we don't talk the consequences of all my years of addiction and it sucks. But I believe that if I continue doing the right things, that God will restore that relationship. Eventually and I trust that wholeheartedly Caleb and I, we have a better relationship now. We're working through things, we've been going to therapy, so I'm thankful to have that relationship. So I'm out of their lives, you know pretty much. They're 17 and 18 years old, about to be 18 and 19. And they've never really seen me, a whole lot never been present.
Speaker 2:I'd come around on holidays just because I was strung out and all I could think about was getting the next high, you know where I was going to get the next fix, and so this is one of those moments, though, where I feel like God was trying to step in and intervene in my life. When Caleb was five years old, he was staying with me at the time in my life. When Caleb was five years old, he was staying with me at the time and, mind you, I was never. I could never hold down a job, reagan, because of my addiction. I would work for a little while, I'd get a couple of paychecks, and then I'd go and and get my meet, my pill dealer, my drug dealer, and I'd get a bunch of drugs, and I'd be like all right, I want to sell drugs, I'm not going to work, and so that's what my life, that was, the.
Speaker 2:That was the cycle that I was in for years and years and years. Obviously, that continued to progress, and when I couldn't fund my habit, I was going stealing and I was, um, you know, doing all those types of things to fuel that habit. But while, when Caleb was five years old, my dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer. But while when Caleb was five years old, my dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer, pancreatic cancer, they gave him six months to live, and that devastating news just crushed me and again I didn't have the ability to cope in a healthy way. I was snorting pills at the time, I was drinking really heavily, I was snorting cocaine crack. I was doing it all at this time and none of that was helping me deal with the pain and the news that I just got about my dad.
Speaker 2:And so, when that wasn't enough, I turned to the thing that I said I was never going to do, which was shoot, start shooting up. And the girl that I was dating at the time. She brought some syringes to the house. I told she brought some syringes to the house. I told her to bring some syringes to the house, and I remember sitting in that bathroom and I'm just staring at these syringes. I'm staring at this loaded syringe and I've got a pill in it and I'm just looking at it and I'm like, how did I get here, like, and I had so much talent and ability and promise. And I'm sitting on this, sitting in this bathroom, getting ready to shoot up and doing the thing that I said I was never going to do. And so Caleb starts knocking on the door. He's like Dad, dad, what are you doing? And I remember putting a towel down at the bottom of the door and I was like I'm here now, I might as well do it. So I shot up bottom of the door and I was like I'm here now, I might as well do it. So I shot up and that euphoria, that, that feeling that it gave me, that high, that it gave me, the escape that it gave me, was something I did not want to let go of. I was immediately I mean the. The addiction and that desire to want to do more was at an all-time high, and so I started to use intravenously for several years.
Speaker 2:I ended up moving in with my dad, thinking I was going to take care of him. My dad was my hero. He's the person I looked up to. He's a hardworking man. He was a hustler from way back. He, you know, he built, he was a carpenter, had his own business, and I think I get that's where I get my entrepreneurial spirit is from my dad, you know. He employed 20, 30 people, built houses all over our community and everything, but he had his own demons. And I've seen him, you know, drinking. I seen him partying, I seen him dealing drugs, and so that's the thing. I didn't look at the hard work and I didn't look how he was providing for the family. I looked at the fast way, the easy way, and that's that's what I gravitated towards. And, um, mind you, though I mean, like I said, my dad was my, I was, I was my person. I'm named after you, though I mean, like I said, my dad was my, that was my person. I'm named after, you know, I'm Caleb McCoy, the second, and he was everything to me.
Speaker 2:And so I move in a house with him and and, uh, my addiction's just so deep, you know, and it just had such a hold on me that I started to steal my dad's pain medication. You know, he's obviously diagnosed with cancer, and so they got him on different pain medications and, uh, I would wait until he would get sick and go into the bathroom, where I'd wait until and I'd come into his room and I'd get a bunch of his pain pills, where I'd wait until he left the house and I figured out the combination to his safe and I break into his safe and get his pain medication, or I'd steal checks out of his checkbook and I'd be writing checks and cashing them and stuff and he always he continued to love me through it and he continued to tell my mom to never give up on me. And and um brings me back to the story I've started to share a minute ago. But he fought and held on for three years. They gave, gave him six months to live and I remember the nurse asking him why are you like you're? You're a tough man, caleb why are you fighting so hard? He was like cause I want to be here, I want to see my son become the man that I know he can be.
Speaker 2:And a couple of days before he passed away, he called me to his bedside and and he's just me and him he asked everybody else to leave. I'm standing by his bed and I'm looking down on him. My dad's like 130 pounds and, just you know, this cancer is eating him alive. And he's looking at me. He said, son, you're going to, you're going to beat this one day and you're going to do some great things for our family, for our community and for the world. And I had sweat beads rolling down my face. All I could do was think about my next high, because I was withdrawing at the time and I thought to myself you're wrong, I'm a junkie and this is how. This is who I am. And I honestly didn't think I deserved the breath that I was breathing. That's what I thought about myself. I thought I was worthless.
Speaker 2:And a couple days later, he is at the end of his life and I hear his heart rate monitor beeping. I'm in the bathroom connected to his hospice room, and I hear his heart rate monitor beep and it flatlines. And Reagan, I got a needle in my arm when my dad left this earth. I was shooting up in the bathroom when he passed away and I heard him die. And I'm here pulling that needle out of my arm, wipe the blood off, walk out of the bathroom, go over to him, give him a kiss on the forehead and I called my drug dealer. I just left the hospital. I said, hey, I need something. My dad just passed away.
Speaker 2:Right back to it, right back to the chaos, right back in the game again. And that was not my bottom, and I think there's high bottoms alcoholics and addicts and there's low bottom alcoholics and addicts and I was one of those low bottom people and so, um, I get, go right back to it, only said it's at a, it's at even higher level now, because I at that point I didn't think I had anything else to live for, like I didn't know how to deal with that loss, and so I started to just do more drugs and started getting arrested, overdosing. I had six overdoses and had to be brought back with Narcan on three different occasions throughout 2014 to 2017. One of those critical moments, looking back, was 2016. And I was in the bathroom and I tried to kill myself by overdose. I remember getting a bunch of heroin, a bunch of meth, I loaded into a syringe. I looked at it and it was. It was black. It was black and that's an indication of how strong it was Right. And so I'm staring at this black syringe and I know it's enough to kill me and I'm like screw it, I don't want to do it anyways, because I ain't got nothing to live for. And so I shot up.
Speaker 2:I go into immediate overdose. I got a bunch of people partying at my house at the time. Everybody scatters but the girl I was dating and a boy that I grew up with a guy I grew up with and they are slapping me, beating on my chest, dragging me to the bathroom, throwing ice water on me. They call the ambulance. Emt workers get there and start working on me. Give me Narcan, give me multiple kits of Narcan.
Speaker 2:Emt worker calls the ER doctor and says he's not. He's not breathing, he's blue, his eyelids are blue, he has no heartbeat. And the ER doctor says, if you still have Narcan, you continue to work on him. So she gives me another Narcan kit. Finally come out of it. And you go into immediate withdrawal. So you're combative when you wake up and you're just ready to fight and I ran everybody off, told everybody to get the hell out of my house. I did not want help, I had this and I didn't need help. That's what I believed. And I ran everybody off. Little did I know, reagan, that the EMT worker that saved my life that night would later on, three years later, become my mother-in-law Wow.
Speaker 1:Three years later become my mother-in-law. Wow.
Speaker 2:And I didn't know that until I went and picked up Caitlin for our first date. She was living with her mom because she was on probation. Caitlin's got a powerful story too. She's been in and out of prison and all kinds of stuff but graduated valedictorian, been in and out of prison. But I go to pick her up and I start telling her mom this same story. Her mom breaks down and starts crying and she was like do you know who saved your life that night? And I said no, she said that was me. And so if that is not an indication that God is real, god is real, I don't know what is, because you cannot draw that up.
Speaker 2:And and so later the next year, early in the next year, I experienced my final overdose in February 2017. I had warrants in three different counties, um, and they finally caught me, him me up, arrested me, set me down, sent me down to Swain County Detention Center in Bryson City, north Carolina, and I hit my rock bottom, you know, and it was about three weeks into my jail stay that I figured out that God was the rock at that bottom. And for the first time in my life, I start praying one of those foxhole prayers Never really done it before and I've got it in my. I've got the papers at home from some of my journal entries when I was locked up. But I went back and looked at it because we celebrated seven years clean the other day. I was reading this and I'm crying out to God and I'm like show me that my dad's still with me. Somehow. It's about three weeks in, so I'm starting to think a little bit more clearly and I'm open to change. And I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. And so I'm sitting in this jail and I'm writing out this prayer for the first time in my life and you can see a night and day difference. I'm cussing every other word in this journal entry GD, this F, this blah, blah, blah. And then I'm like show me that my dad's with me somehow and I remember writing that and I lay my pen down and I'll go upstairs to grab something. I'll come back down and a pastor walks.
Speaker 2:He was. It was such a striking resemblance of my dad. So he had the same eye color, same mustache, same flannel shirt, same type of belt tucked in, same shoes, pants. His watch was turned on the inside of his wrist and he comes. And he was like you know why you can't beat this? And I was like no, he's like because you're trying to do it in your own strength. And he was like and you're relying on other people and you've not given God a chance. And he was like just talk about surrender and talking about allowing God into my life and allowing God to carry those burdens and all those mistakes and everything that I had experienced and giving them to him, and he would use that for a bigger purpose. And I was like that's what I've been missing. I'm fighting with myself here. I'm fighting all these things that I'm, that I. That's not mine, they're not my battles. And it was a very simple gospel message and I was like okay, you know, I want to learn more about this.
Speaker 2:And and I gave my life to Christ that day, that's when I came to faith and my whole perspective changed, my heart changed. That moment I was a completely different person, like that. And as he was leaving, he shook my hand the same way my dad used to, and he placed his left hand over ours. He winks at me same way my dad used to. If he hadn't seen me in a few days. He said I love you, son, I'll be back in here to see you soon.
Speaker 2:And I was like I just asked God for a sign that my dad was still with me. This man came, came in here and showed up and, as Christ you know, and showed up the way that I need, like the sign that I was looking for. It was like I had a visit, visit from my dad, and it completely wrecked me. I was I was looking for. It was like I had a visit from my dad and it completely wrecked me. I was crying. I was telling all the other guys, like you don't see guys crying in jail Like you know, you just got to be tough, you got to, you know, not show weakness. And we were all crying, like, and I just told them what I experienced and everything.
Speaker 2:And they seen that change in me and I always explain it as I had this exhilarating feeling of freedom and I was still locked up but I knew everything was different and so that's when my life changed and that's when I started to uh, started to heal and started to grow and started to learn um about, about who God was and how I and how I needed to follow that, follow his plan for my life and I spent six months in jail and I was constantly calling my mom, trying to get out for the first three weeks, and I had such a peace over my life, reagan, that after that happened my mom still tells everybody she's like I knew he was different when he called me. From the day before he called me to the day he called me after he gave his life to God, he was completely different. And so I told my mom I was like, hey, I'm good, like, don't worry about bonding me out, I'm not going to ask you to bond me out, I want to sit here, I want to do my time. God's got me in here for a reason. I want to get stronger. I'm going to use this time to get ready for whenever I do come back out, because it's not going to be easy. And so that's what I did.
Speaker 2:I minded my business. I started to read things, read different books. That was helping me to heal, to grow, to learn how to deal with life on life's terms, because I didn't know how to do that. I'd been a slave to my addiction. I've been a slave to my emotions, a slave to different circumstances and challenges in my life, and I didn't want to do that anymore and so I was going to do my time and not let my time do me, and started working out.
Speaker 2:So everybody's always like well, how'd you start running and how'd you start working out? We had 20 steps in jail. I would walk up and down those steps for hours. I would get up in the morning and I would walk laps around this, around our our um common room where we got where we ate and everything else. Get up in the morning, I just walk. In the evenings we would do jailhouse workouts and we got a men's health body weight workout guide, got one of our family members to send it to us while we were locked up and about four months ago I was just featured in men's health as a first step series about how I started my fitness journey. So going from working out in jail to men's health to being featured in men's health and and, uh, you know, a matter of six years was again one of those God things like absolutely mind boggling.
Speaker 2:But during that time, my tribe, the Eastern Band of Cherokee Indians. We do this bike ride in conjunction with Cherokee Nation out in Oklahoma. So what we do is we retrace the northern route of the Trail of Tears. When the government took our land, shipped it, moved us out west. That's why we do that in honor and remembrance of our ancestors. So while I'm locked up, they're doing this ride. I see the newspaper article and I'm like that's it. I want to do that. When I get out of here I want to be the first person in recovery to go do that ride. So do my six months get out.
Speaker 2:As soon as I get out, I sign up for Ironman 70.3. Mind you, I just come out of a 15 year addiction. I'd not been running except from the police, and not been biking, not been swimming. And I sign up and I do an Ironman 70.3 beach to battleship in Wilmington and getting through that, experiencing that, being a part of that community, learning how to do hard things, putting myself in a position where I had to work through adversity and putting into practice all the things that I had learned during my time in jail. Practice all the things that I had learned during doing my time in jail and um, understanding my why and everything that I had, that I had overcame and that God had brought me through. That's how I got through that race, because I did.
Speaker 2:I didn't do any training. Basically, I rode a bike. I wasn't running at the time or anything. I bought a bike the day before I went down, so I was riding a mountain bike to train on. Then I bought a road bike the day before I went down and so I did that triathlon with flat pedals. I didn't know what clip-ins were at the time. I was running in basketball shorts. It was crazy. I didn't know what the hell I was doing, reagan.
Speaker 2:So I go do that race and I was immediately addicted. I was immediately hooked with the community, the challenge of it, the way it made me feel the same high that I got from the drugs. That's what fitness, that's what running, that's what all that endurance sports was doing for me. So I'll go to sign up for this bike ride that I mentioned and they tell me you have a felony conviction on your drug, on your on your record that we can't allow you to go on the bike ride. So I try to go get the rules changed. I go to our tribal leadership, our chief, vice chief, council members, go in front of all of our leadership, live during a council session being televised, and I'm advocating for this rule change and they're like we can't do it.
Speaker 2:Sorry, and I didn't even know what I said in the moment, but I was like, if you're not going to, let me ride the bike, I'll run to Oklahoma. And I remember everybody looking at me scoffing because here I am in early recovery making this big, grandiose, you know plan that I want to do, and people scoffed at me, rolled their eyes and I remember that and I could have let that do one of two things. Right, I could have got all my feelings about it. I could have just let that make me go and sit down and like, oh, they don't believe me, believe in me, but I remember just having that feeling. I'm like you know what? People have counted me out my whole life and I'm tired of that and I want to prove to them. And so this was November 2017, and I started to train February excuse me, may 14, 2018,.
Speaker 2:I left from our mother town, gadua it's called Gadua Mound. I had the news team there, local WLOS out of Asheville. They came A lot of those same tribal leaders and everything came to see me off and I embarked on this journey to Oklahoma and I ran 800 miles in 40 days, got a lot of regional news coverage Chattanooga, knoxville, alabama. During that trip, I had a woman reach out to me from Texas who's seen one of those news stories and she's like you want to think I'm crazy, but I need to share something with you. She messages me on Facebook Messenger, so she calls me and I'm chatting with her and she said you don't know me, I've seen your story and I had, I had this dream after I seen your story about you and you've got these huge chains like all over, like wrapped around your your, your shoulders and your neck, and she was like they're weighing you down or pulling you back, but you're like fighting and running through it and every step that you take, these chain links are breaking off. And she's like I don't know what that means. I don't know if you've experienced anything like that, but I just felt like God told me that I needed to share that with you. And so I'm like crazy Christian girl, whatever you know, just chalk it up Like you know what you know it was. It was wild to hear and so, um, I was like thanks, you know, appreciate it.
Speaker 2:A couple of days goes by and I experienced my first loss while I'm in early recovery. My aunt died from endocarditis. She had a massive heart attack due to her intravenous drug use, and that was the first time that I experienced, you know, any kind of setback or pain or adversity while I was in recovery. So that was a real critical moment for me and I had to ask myself like well, how are you going to? Like I know how I've always coped with it. Yeah, I'll go find some dope, go shoot some dope. But I was like you know what, I'll go find some dope, go shoot some dope. But I was like you know what? I'm not going back to that anymore. I'm going to do what I've been doing for the past several months. I'm just going to show up and I'm gonna put one foot in front of the other and it's going to. It sucks. I don't know how I want to get through it, but I just know I've got to keep moving forward. And so my mom had to come back and bury her sister, bury my aunt and Caitlin, and I stayed out there and we kept going.
Speaker 2:Like you know, whenever you're doing a cross country trip like that, you'll run for three, five, seven miles. She's in a support vehicle, she drives ahead, so we're doing that all day, right, and she's waiting on me to come to the support vehicle and she goes out for a run and she knows I was getting ready to be close back to the vehicle. So she turns around, comes back Right when she starts to turn around, though, she looks down and there's a chain link. So we're like, all right, coincidence, right. So she grabs that chain link and she tells me about it. I'm like, oh yeah, that's cool. Mind you, though, I'm running every day and I'm not seeing any chain links. Yeah, so she happens to find this first one.
Speaker 2:So we get a few days later, about a week later, I'm running 49 miles in honor of my aunt that's how old she was when she passed. It's about mile 47, 10, 30, 11. At night, pitch black, we're standing at the back of the truck drinking some water, getting a bite to eat Got a two-mile push before we finish and Caitlin's walking around the back of the truck. She screams like jumps back. I'm like I got a rattlesnake or copperhead or something, and right where we had parked that night, in the middle of this really, really important run, she's standing over a big chain link. So I was like all right, god, I see you. Now You're doing something. And so we picked the chain link up. We keep going. A couple days later, I'm running through Osage, arkansas, and I'm coming up the road.
Speaker 2:I don't know if anybody listening to this is a Conway Twitty fan, but I'm a huge Conway Twitty fan and my dad and I used to listen to this song called that's my Job. If you haven't heard it, it's great, one of the classics. So I'm listening to that's my Job by Conway Twitty, running up the interstate and I'm like ugly crying, thinking my dad, and he's like man, I wish he was here to see me. I wish he was here to like just be here and experience this journey with me. And, um, at the same time, I look over to my right and there's a sign that says McCoy's Garage. I was like, okay, that's cool, like thinking about my dad, caleb McCoy. Here's this sign, mccoy's garage and I stand, I take a selfie and I take that snap at selfie and I look down and there's a chain link right where I'm standing what? And I'm like I'm right where I'm supposed to be, I'm right where I'm supposed to be, like I'm so glad that I didn't.
Speaker 2:This is what led me to running. If they would have told me that I could have done that bike ride. I might be cycling, like I might not have a career as a running coach. I wouldn't have went to Oklahoma and met the people that I met, that I'm still connected to, that are going to be coming here in a couple of weeks building a deck on our recovery house. Like God was orchestrating all this while it was, as it was unfolding, and giving me these signs like you're out where you're supposed to be, trust that, like, you're going to have these challenges, you're going to have this adversity, but you got to keep showing up and just trust in this plan that I have. You know this plan that I have for your life. And so I finished on my birthday, june 28th 2018.
Speaker 2:And almost all those same council members and tribal leadership that scoffed at me and laughed at me flew to Oklahoma and was there to hug my neck and all the tribal leadership out in Cherokee nation and Tahlequah, oklahoma chiefs, council members.
Speaker 2:I went from being this strung out drug addict to nobody that nobody could trust, to being just recognized and honored by our tribal leadership. And I mean, that's not anything that I did, that's just that's all God you know, and that's that's kind of how that led me to, to where I am today, you know, and to our organization and to all the support that we have and that opened so many doors. And honestly, like I said a second ago, like where I'm at with my run coaching and people seeing what I've been doing for years and years and years, and they're like I'm at with my run coaching and people seeing what I've been doing for years and years and years, and they're like I want to be a part of that, or I want that guy to coach me, I want him to be a part of my part of my journey and it's a complete honor and yeah, Wow Praise.
Speaker 2:God.
Speaker 1:And it's I mean, I have so many chills right now and tears and hearing a story like that, like it is truly all God, because you hear those things and you're like what are the odds that you continue to find those chain links, or that Caitlin's mom was the nurse that saved you, like you almost hear that and it's like there's there's no way, but like that's God, like every single God story and every single little butterfly effect. It's like there we we just put limits on what God can do. And like your story is truly a testament to like God can do anything if we just give that to him. I had no clue. No clue because you look at your Instagram and you're just a joyful, a joyful person and like a person that you run races and you crush it and you are a successful coach and you know there's a little bit on your Instagram of a little bit of your story, but like I mean the depths of that. Thank you for sharing that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, it's. Uh, I think it's really important, you know, to talk about, to share that testimony, you know, and uh, encourage other people and just to give God praise. You know that's what it's all about, and so I mean it's I'm honored to be able to, to share that and just talk about how far God has brought me.
Speaker 1:And it's how old are you?
Speaker 2:37.
Speaker 1:Okay, that I mean. And then he's not done with you yet either. Like imagine what else is going to happen and how he's going to continue to use you Like. It just makes me so excited.
Speaker 2:Absolutely, I know that's what I mean thinking about all the things that we get to experience. You know, caitlin and I will be standing somewhere and we're like, can you believe that we get to experience? You know, caitlin and I, we'll be standing somewhere and we're like can you believe that we're here right now? Can you believe that we're getting to experience this right now? You know, like thinking about just being strung out, having warrants, being in and out of jail, experiencing overdoses, all these different things, the way that are just chaotic and destructive our lives used to be, and then, like we'll find ourselves standing at the edge of the Grand Canyon, you know, or standing in Oklahoma, and we have different, you know, leadership and just people like wanting to be around us and wanting to hear our stories. And yeah, it's, it's incredible, wow.
Speaker 1:And I. How long ago was that that you ran to Oklahoma? What year was that?
Speaker 2:That was in 2018, 2018. And now, honestly, that that gave me, that's given me the curiosity and that's given me the strength to do my next big endeavor, which is going to be next year, when I want to run across the country. And so one of the things I want to do is to make my transcontinental run unique to me, because you know it's been done over 400 times. I want to include the Junaluska route. Junaluska was one of our chiefs here locally who was shipped to Oklahoma during the Trail of Tears and he resisted and left Oklahoma territory, indian territory and came back to Cherokee. And so I want to include the Junaluska route in my trans con run Nobody's ever done it before and just highlight you know who we are as Cherokee people and yeah, one of our chiefs and leaders.
Speaker 1:Wow, yeah, you'll have to get like like a whole crew for that.
Speaker 2:I mean like I feel like you need to document this for sure. Oh, yeah, oh, for sure. I definitely want to get a, get an RV, get a camera crew, videographer. I want to, you know, create a documentary for it and everything. So I want to raise money for our nonprofit organization. I would love to, you know, raise $250,000. I don't, you know who knows, but that's what I'm thinking right now off the top of my head. But I want to start prepping for that here soon. I've already been looking at routes and everything.
Speaker 1:So I was going to ask. If there was cause, I'll link it and, um, whenever I post the episode, like share it. But is there? Do you guys have a website that people can donate on, or is there any?
Speaker 2:we yeah, we have a link that you can donate. I can send it to you.
Speaker 1:Okay, yeah, I definitely want to include that in the description because, um, I know some people here listening like can relate to your story or just feel led to give. So I would love to have that opportunity for people to do that, but I'm like I don't even want to talk. Like I know we were going to talk about. I'm going to have to do another podcast, um, soon, so you can talk about your running business and like how, um, some of the questions that we asked, but, like I mean, your story is just incredible. So what I do want to ask, though what are you? So you just did Boston last week.
Speaker 2:Second Boston.
Speaker 1:Okay, um, how did that go?
Speaker 2:Oh it was, it was good Boston's epic. So I say I say it was good because obviously I didn't run as well as I wanted to. But I just came off of Asheville Marathon, which was March 16th, and then trying to race Boston Thirty days later, my body was just beat up. I was just mentally exhausted too at that point from coming out of a marathon block and then going right into another marathon. So I ran 24, 41 at Asheville, got third overall, and then I ran two, 47 at Boston, which was seven minutes slower than last year's Boston.
Speaker 1:But not bad. What's that? What pace is that?
Speaker 2:So two, two 40, the two 41 was a 608 pace and then Boston are in 624 pace. But I called Caitlin at mile five and I was like, yeah, I'm probably going to be jogging, it's not going to be pretty today, I'm just going to try to get across the finish line. And I fueled really well, I stayed hydrated. So I mean, that's some of the things that I did well, like I had some of the wins that I had from the race. You know, I put my head down and just grinded through it and so you know I was, I was happy with it, Not wanting my best, but Is?
Speaker 1:is Boston a race though that people just like a lot of times just have fun with it and they made it and they just enjoy it, or do you feel like a lot of people try to hit PRs there?
Speaker 2:I think it's about 50-50. I think some people just love to go and soak in all the crowds and you know, wave and get involved with all the different spots on the course. You know you've got the Wellesley Scream Tunnel, you've got Heartbreak Hill. There's a big crew there, big support crew there. You got pioneers, who's really popular over the last couple years, pioneers run club, and so it's like you, you kind of stop and you soak it all in. Or or you got people are like okay, this is uh, you know this is a net downhill course. I'm really going to try to send it and see what I can do. So I think it's a little bit of both.
Speaker 1:So it is net downhill. Yeah yeah, was the Asheville marathon silly.
Speaker 2:Oh my gosh yeah.
Speaker 1:But it's, it's a half marathon and I signed up for it the day before last year. I'm like why did I sign up for this? These hills are terrible.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, sign up for this. These hills are terrible. Yeah, yeah, it's a difficult course the first. What five miles is just all climbing? Yeah, it was. It was tough.
Speaker 2:But, um, I've been in a plateau for a minute now as a runner. So I'm switching some things up. I've, uh, I'm gonna be changing up my coaches, my run coach I've been with him over for over two years. I would not be the runner that I am today without him. Owe him a ton of credit just to, uh, as a coach and as a mentor, helping me with my own coaching and everything. Give me ideas and stuff. But you know it's it's time for a change. Switch things up.
Speaker 2:And I've got I've not even scratched scratched the surface on what I'm capable of. I truly believe that, like, I think that I want to try to run 237 in the fall or winter, either a November or December marathon, and then I want to transition over to ultras. I'll do back-to-back 100 milers in January and February and then I'll start my TransCon run in March. That's what I've got on the agenda. What's that? Which ultras you're going to do? Um, I'll probably do long haul in Florida Land O'Lakes, florida. It's flat and fast, and then I don't know about February. I want to start looking around, though, why you got anything in mind.
Speaker 1:No, I was just wondering. I'm like so impressed that I mean people that do a hundred milers, like that. I mean people that do 100 milers, like that's just, that's a long time yeah, yeah, I want to try.
Speaker 2:I want to try to run a fast 100 at at Land O'Lakes, be competitive and, who knows, I might try to win it.
Speaker 1:I don't know you'll probably you'll show up and try to win it for sure, oh for sure, yeah, wow, I just I'm like still so amazed by your story. I mean, where you are now it's like do you, do you feel disconnected from that person? Like looking back at that person, do you feel like I cannot believe that that was me?
Speaker 2:Some days, some days, and I think it's really important to reflect, I think it's important to to to remember, not so much live there but to visit, you know, to think about who I was, to think about the pain that I caused, to think about the disappointment that I inflicted on my family and the heartbreak, and, um, you know how many times I've talked to my mom and I was like mom, I'm sorry. You know, I've seen people that I've hurt years later. You know, I mean that's part of recovery making amends and asking for forgiveness, and, and sometimes people accept it and sometimes people don't want to hear it, but it helps you to heal and grow. You know, cause for me, I mean, we hang on to things and we'll beat ourselves up over the mistakes that we made, over just how we hurt people, and so, you know, anytime, anytime I can, I can try to make amends with somebody that I've hurt. You know I do that.
Speaker 2:And, uh, I tell this story of how I betrayed my dad and how, you know how I just broke his heart for so long. You know it's important for me to tell that story because it's real, that's the reality of my life, that was my existence for a long time. Honestly, it keeps me grateful. It keeps me grateful because if I don't ever think about it or talk about it, then I'm not going to be grateful for how far God's brought me either. I think reflection is is definitely important and healthy.
Speaker 1:Yeah, wow, um, I know, definitely, like when I connect with Caitlin, when Caitlin right, yeah, yeah, I would love to hear, hopefully to meet you guys soon and come up there, um, but thank you Like, like seriously, thank you for sharing your story. I know that you maybe have shared it a few times, but I know it's not easy to talk about it and sure you maybe think of new things every time and remember new things and have all those feelings again yeah, for sure you.
Speaker 2:I mean, it's just for me. There's a couple of quotes that I really love. One of them is there's no coming to consciousness without pain bottom. And then understanding that rock was that god was. The rock at the bottom was the most important piece of, you know, the most important thing in my life. I didn't have anybody else to turn to to help me deal with all the things that I was dealing with and hanging on to and carrying, and just when I heard that message, it was like no, the creator of the universe is on your side, you are beloved, you have purpose, you are loved. Like was absolutely transformative for me and I was like all right, you know. Like that's what I've been missing. And then also to like.
Speaker 2:Another quote that I love is do we transmit our pain or do we transform it?
Speaker 2:And for so long I was transmitting pain, I was, I was hurting people.
Speaker 2:And now, like I said at the beginning of the podcast, you know it's important for me and as a Cherokee person, like and as a Cherokee person, like we lived life not to take.
Speaker 2:We lived life like anytime you went to the woods to get some sort of medicine right, some sort of plant. Anytime you took something to create crafts, you would leave something, like you would only take what you were going to use, and like learning more about my culture and who we are as as Cherokee people has helped me to heal and grow, and so I'm like man I've been, I've been consuming, like our world is just we get the consumerism and how we're always taking, taking, taking, and very rarely do we ever stop to be like man. How can I give, like, how can I go volunteer some time at a homeless shelter? How can I donate, you know, like donate to this organization and like that's, I want to give back and I don't want to. I don't want to just consume and take anymore, and so that's like one of the things that's really important to me and that's why we're doing what we're doing in our community, and so hopefully somebody hears this and they decide they want to give back in some way, form or fashion.
Speaker 1:Wow, yeah, that's um, that's incredible. I'm just, I'm like speechless by everything, but I'm super excited for what God's going to continue to do and the nonprofit that you guys have. And then just in your life and I know everyone listening is going to be so excited to see what else you do personally too um, with other races and endeavors and, yeah, like you're just getting started, truly like hearing your story, like you're just getting started for sure, for sure.
Speaker 1:Oh my gosh. Well, thank you, we're. We have to. I'm literally going to text you right after this and we're going to schedule another podcast we can actually talk about. I want to hear about your running business and um answer some questions and things, but, like, this was incredible, I think this is probably one of my favorite podcasts that we've done and thank you for just being vulnerable, um and all of this and sharing your story. I appreciate it so much, of course. Thank you, reagan. Well, everyone listening. Thank you guys for listening and um, please like Caleb know if you like really enjoyed this one. Shoot him a message, give him a follow so he can keep up with everything that he's doing, and then I'll link his Instagram and how you can donate if you feel led to donate to their nonprofit. What was the name of it?
Speaker 2:Raise Hope, recovery and Consulting.
Speaker 1:Amazing, okay, perfect. Yeah, I will link everything there if you guys feel led to donate to it. And such an incredible thing. Thank you again. This was so great and thank you guys for listening.
