7 - Don't Let Fear Hold You Back from Becoming a Speaker

Of all the things that keep adults from achieving their goals with getting paid to speak, is fear. It holds them back. It might be the fear that they won't succeed, that others will laugh at them, that they won't be accepted or that they might fail. Many of us heard the message over and over, "You're not good enough," and many are allowing that endless tape to play over and over, especially when we feel that others didn't like what we had to offer.

Doug Foresta is a therapist and podcasting coach and someone I've included in my inner circle for years. I've invited him in to speak to groups I've been a part of and we worked together for workforce development groups nationally. I had an opportunity to be featured as a guest on Doug's radio show and we discussed, not only what's inside my book, but the things like fear that hold people back from bringing their gifts to the world.

When you are presenting something that ignites the passion in you, everything changes. The topic is delivered effectively, the audience is receptive and you as a speaker feel so complete and aligned with yourself and your message. So figure out what your message is and start putting it together to change the lives of others. This recording is the property of Bill Corbett and the GET PAID TO SPEAK PODCAST, copyright 2023. All rights reserved.

For more help with professional speaking, get the book FROM THE SOAPBOX TO THE STAGE, available on Amazon. Copyright 2025  Bill Corbett and The Get Paid To Speak Podcast. All Rights Reserved.

Transcript

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I am Bill Corbett, professional speaker, author and television program producer and host. After nearly 20 years of traveling nationally and internationally delivering presentations, I sat down and wrote the Amazon bestseller from the soapbox to the stage, how to use Your Passion to start a speaking business. And now you're listening to the Get Paid to Speak podcast to help you use what you feel passionate about, to inspire change in others. Of all the things that keep adults from achieving their goals with getting paid to speak it's fear, it holds them back. It might be the fear that they won't succeed, that others will laugh at them, that they won't be accepted or that they might fail. Many of us heard the message over and over you are not good enough, and many are allowing that endless tape to play over and over, especially when we feel that others didn't like what we had to offer. Doug Reta is a therapist and podcasting coach, and someone I've included in my inner circle for many years, I've invited him in to speak to groups that I've been a part of, and we worked together for workforce development groups nationally. I had an opportunity to be featured as a guest on Doug's radio show, and we discussed not only what's inside my book, but the things like fear that hold people back from bringing their gifts to the world. And hello everyone, this is Doug Reta and welcome back to another episode of Creating Change. With me today is Bill Corbett, author from the soapbox to the stage, how to use Your Passion to start a speaking business. And that's exactly what we're going to be talking about. And I'll just say a little bit about Bill, we'll bring him right on. But I do think that for any of you who are interested in, first of all, we're going to talk about a little bit why you should be interested, but we'll talk for any of you that do have a passion, we're going to talk about getting started in speaking and why that's a good idea, and talk about Bill's new book. After traveling and lecturing nationally for several years, bill sat down and wrote this book in response to to him over and over, I want to do what you do, how do I do it? And so the result is the book from soapbox to this stage, how to use your passion to start a speaking business. And I definitely encourage you to visit www start a speaking business.com. But thanks for joining me today. Hey, great, Doug, it's great to be here. Thank you so much. Absolutely. Pleasure to have you. So let's get right into it. Maybe we could talk about the, obviously just mentioned a little about what got you started writing this book, but I'm curious though, for people who are thinking about maybe I would like to speak, what are some of the positives about starting a speaking business? Well, first of all, you get to work for yourself, but more importantly is the discovery of what burns with passion inside of you, what are you most passionate about? And most people, unfortunately are not doing every day what they feel passionate about. They're stuck working to someone else's agenda, which I found myself doing that and actually began my speaking business. Gee, a good 12 to 15 years before I ever left corporate America to give myself a chance to really build the business I wanted to have. Well, that's an interesting thing as well, for example. So for somebody who let's say is, and I know you cover a lot of this in the book, but for someone who let's say has a full-time job, should they then just quit tomorrow and start a speaking business? No, I encourage people to start slow because you've got to go through the steps first to figure out what your passion is, make sure you're on the right track. You've heard the phrase of being climbing the ladder, but leaning up against the wrong wall. So you got to make sure that the ladder that you're climbing is actually leaning against the wall represented by what you love to do. In other words, if money and time were no issue, what would just burn inside of you to get you up early in the morning to want to do and work on? And that's what I think people really need to do first to figure that out. So you can do all this while you're still full-time employed. Now, there's a lot of people that are buying my book because they're already unemployed or they were laid off or they're facing that issue or they're just not happy with their job and they hate getting up in the morning and they find themselves living for the weekend, living for the vacation, and there's just nothing inside of them that makes 'em want to do what they're doing every day. And isn't that really the saddest thing? Because then we're wasting our lives, we're wasting all of everything that we've been brought here to do. And unfortunately we're doing it for money or we're doing it because we're trying to live according to someone else's life, like our parents. I mean, how many people heard their parents say, we're going to send you to the best college. You're going to be a doctor because your father and your grandfather were doctors. But yet inside that person goes, I don't want to be a doctor. But they're afraid to speak up and they suddenly discover they're in their forties and fifties and they're still living their parents' life. What's interesting about that, just to say for a minute, is that as things have changed, so much as Randy Gage says, risky is the new safe, that in fact, I dare someone to really find a job that is what is it going to work for the post office getting a federal job? There's no job any longer that is safe in that way. No, no, there isn't. In fact, one of my favorite books was written by Stan Hacker. He wrote the book, we Are All Self-Employed, and I really believe that, and he wrote that book, gosh, back in the nineties when I found his book. But you're right, we have to. And like he said in the book, we've got to become the person that is self-employed. Even if you work for a large organization, even if you're fortunate enough to be making six figures driving an ice car and you're working for somebody else, you've got to be self-employed. And that means you've got to sharpen your skills, make sure you love doing what you're doing, and if you don't love doing what you're doing, then find something that you do love and do that part-time because we've got to develop that passion. And that's one way we can bring passion into our lives is find that one thing that you love to do that's not necessarily your full-time job. So in my example, I've been in 30 years in it, so I was an IT director for many, many years, but what really caught me on fire was working with parents. So back in the nineties, I began to develop my expertise in parenting, getting degrees in education and networking because I began to set myself up that one day I would be able to do this and I would be able to speak full-time on parenting. And that's what I ended up being able to do. And actually that is a perfect segue into what I was going to ask you next, which was, I'm wondering if you could talk a little bit about what your life looks like today for people to get a sense of, for people who may not be familiar with you. So what does that speaking life look like for you? Well, first of all, what I'll tell you right away is I work more than I did when I worked for an organization, but. It's. Work I love to do. I can't wait to get up every morning. In fact, my wife busts me because sometimes I can't go to sleep at night and I'll be in my office, my home office working from six o'clock in the morning until about nine or 10 o'clock at night because there's a lot of work to do running your own business. But the day goes by so fast because what I'm doing, I love doing, and I have the support from my wife to let me do this, and she's an entrepreneur as well. She's running her own little business, but I do have to check in with her and say, honey, is it okay if I work a few more hours in the office? So that's what I'm doing. I spend all day on social networking, building my platform, getting bookings, writing my next book, updating blog posts, doing all that stuff. And what's great is my commute to work went from 40 minutes down the road on a highway sitting in traffic to walking down the hallway. You bring up such an interesting point too, and that isn't that a wonderful thing for everyone who's stuck on the road, who people even might be listening to this and be driving. So absolutely, the commute is a very important piece of it, but it is, you bring up an interesting point, which is also about that it's not what makes us happy is not necessarily, of course we don't want to be working every second, but we also, I find that as well that I don't mind working more hours. I left the state job last year after 10 years, and I work more than I did, but I don't feel as drained. I actually feel more energized at the end of the day. I'm tired, but it's a different kind of tired. And I agree with you. In fact, I think when that happens, and first of all, this is my first time hearing that you left your job and congratulations and good for you. I can't wait to chat more with you over coffee. But the thing is, I'm convinced that when we make that transition that we actually begin adding more years to our life. I really do. I think once, even for those listening, even if you're still working for the man, while you're starting to build your speaking business, that you're in your area of expertise, you're already adding days and weeks and months onto your life because you know that there's a bright future at the end of the tunnel and you're building your platform, you're building your message, and you're growing your audience as well. So I don't want you to give away the whole book, but I'm wondering if you can just say a little bit for people who are now saying, yeah, you know what, I'm definitely thinking that this could be a really good thing for me. I like speaking, but I don't have the faintest clue about where to start. How do I even get started getting out there? I don't have any speaking experience. What are some ways in which people can get started speaking? Well, first of all, one of the first chapters of the book, the title of my first chapter is called You're Not a Speaker, you're My Husband. Because that was actually said to me by my wife because it signifies the fact that those closest to us don't easily see us doing something risky or don't see us in a different way. So in the beginning of the book, what you have first have to do is you have to shed all the, and I help you shed all the things that covers people put on you what they wanted you to be for them. So you've got to shed all that stuff and look deep inside your heart. There's exercises you go through to figure that out in case you're stuck. Once you discover what you're passionate about or your area of expertise, then you begin to build on that. And when I talk about area of expertise, even if you come to me and say, look, I'm a couch potato. I don't even have an area of expertise. I'm a couch potato and I watch Star Trek movies. Well, guess what? You could be an expert in Star Trek movies. That's right. You could be an expert on sofas, the ones that feel the best. We've got to be able to look deep inside and say, this is what I love. This is what catches me on fire. So to answer your question in the beginning of the book, if there's exercise you go through to figure out what yours is, then when you discover that, you then the book takes you through the channels of crafting your message. And what is your message? What would you say if somebody gave you 30 minutes to talk about what you love in that area of expertise, what would you say? So you begin to craft the speech, and to do that, you first try to figure out who it is that would be talking to you or who you would be talking to. I mean, so who would listen to you? So if you're a Star Trek fan, who would you talk to? You'd talk to other Trekkies people that love Star Trek, just using that as an example. So the object is, regardless of your expertise, whether it's guarding or bicycling working on cars, you figure out who would be willing to listen to you. And here's the most important thing. What problems do they have that you can fix? What problems can you fix for them? So the book takes you through exercises of figuring out what those problems could be in your area of expertise. Begin crafting the message, and then the next step is to start finding those people who are willing to listen to you, find them, actually envision them in your mind, figure out where they're hanging out and go hang out with them. So for example, I became a parenting expert speaking on the stages of behavior conferences. I had to carve out who my person was that I would speak to, and the more you can narrow it down, the better you're going to find that audience. So mine ended up being parents of young children ages 18 months to six. And then I began to, I developed the first three problems that always came to the top with parenting, which is tantrums and cooperation and mealtime. And then I began to craft my talk around those three problems. And before you know it, I had blog posts, I had magazine articles, I even had speeches ready to go to hit the stage. That's a very, very good point. So you have to find, what do I need to say? What is it that I can speak about? Who needs to hear this? And then find where they are and go hang out with them. And so the people that I hang out with were the parents. So I had to be with parents, I have to get them to know me. So I would join parent associations. I also joined teacher associations. I started subscribing to any newsletters that my typical audience would get teachers and parents or anybody who's caregivers. In fact, my biggest growing audience right now are grandparents. So. I. Had to go get their newsletters, subscribe to them, learn about the events they go to, and begin to really walk and talk their lingo. Now you also talk about, I know in the section two of the book, you talk about the importance also of having a web presence, right? Yeah. You've got to do that because the title of the book is from the soapbox to the stage. Back in the 18th century, the soapbox is what the soap manufacturers used to. That was their trash. They used to transport soaps in these wooden boxes that would get thrown out or used in fires. Well, some people would grab them and stand up on the soapbox in the middle of a busy square and talk about what was important to them, almost like town crier kind of person. Well, those days are gone, but guess what the new soapbox is? It's two things. It's the blog and it's the stage. The next thing to do is you have to develop a web presence. Everybody's hanging out on the web. That's the new hangout, that's the coffee shop because you've got people on Facebook and business people on LinkedIn. There's a brand new site that just opened up. It's supposed to replace Facebook from what I understand. And actually there's several out there. So you got to stay on the cutting edge to know where people hang out. And this is another way of hanging out with the people that would end up hiring you or wanting to hear your message. And I know one of the things that you talk about also is something I love, which is using podcasting as well to expand your reach. I think that's really neat as well that you address that. And that's good because most of us find ourselves driving more than sitting still to be able to read something. And I don't know if you're probably a lot like me. I'm on the go. So when I'm. Sitting. In an airport or on a plane or in a taxi, I can plug my iPod or iPhone in and listen to podcasts from people who have a message I care about that would help me grow, that I can learn from. And then of course, we've got audio books too, which is a big, that's a great way of listening to books. My book is in the process of being converted into an audio book as we speak. Because we're so busy with our lifestyles, it's hard to sit and read something, but being able to listen is one other way of being able to take in the information that we need. As you talk about this, I wonder, here's a question for you that people sometimes ask me, which is they say, well, that's great for you, Doug. You're an extroverted guy and you speak, you just love moving your mouth. But I wonder, in your experience, does one need to be extremely extroverted or the life of the party kind of person to be a successful speaker? Absolutely not. In fact, believe it or not, I'm an introvert, and I've struggled this for years because of the big barrier that stops people from doing this kind of thing who aren't the life of the party. It's the fear. The fear of standing up in front of their peers and being judged. The fear that you're going to screw up, the fear that you're going to make a mistake and say something stupid, and that fear holds us back. But that's representative of everything in life, Doug, because fear is one of the biggest destructive forces of positive living, of empowered living because afraid we're going to make a mistake, afraid someone's going to see us, afraid that we're going to be look like a fool. So the first step, whether you're introvert or extrovert, is to learn to get up in front of others. And that's why I love Toastmasters International in my favorite organizations because it teaches you, helps you get past that fear to be able to stand up and begin developing the confidence you need to get your message out. I love that. Thank you very much for talking about the fear piece because I agree with you and for me also, one of the things that I struggled with for a long time was that fear of being visible. And I think that's something also that, at least from my experience, going from a state employee mindset to an entrepreneurial mindset in many ways, a lot of times in jobs, people were taught keep your head down and don't be noticed. A good day was a day when the boss didn't see you. And that just doesn't work If you're going to be an entrepreneur, if you're going to be a speaker, you have to be visible, you have to be vulnerable to some extent. And that actually starts in our childhood where our parents who were very humble, just our grandparents, said, now it's not about you, it's about other people. So stop being such a show off, stop being. Such. A goofball, that kind of thing. I also wanted to, because I know this is something that you do very successfully just to say something about, you also talk about getting on television and you have a very successful show yourself. So I wondered if you could say a little bit first about just your own show and how you've built that up over time. Well. Most communities in the US have a public access TV show, and it's not even used to the capacity it could. So I knew where mine was, so I went in and checked it out to see what it could offer me because I needed a way to get my message out further. I write a syndicated column. I've been on radio shows. I teach and I speak at conferences, but probably the majority of the people in my own town or surrounding towns don't even know who I am. So I needed them to get my message out to help other parents. So I began to use the public access show, and it's a free resource for people who want to extend their platform. And I've done that. I'm in my third year of production and still going to get you on the show, Doug, and it's a lot of fun. The volunteers help me put it on. We have a sponsor and we created a show that looks similar to Dr. Phil, but it's about parenting, and I say looks familiar to Dr. Pill Phil. The style, the style of it. It's not the same kind of drama, but it's to try to simulate a professional show that people would want to watch. What's wonderful about that too, and I'll say this is to me the same thing about podcasting as well, is that you're getting your message out in a format that people are familiar with. I wonder if, has that helped you build your expertise? Because when we think about everyone loves the media, everyone loves tv, everyone loves, so that you're a producer and host of a television show, did that give you extra credibility as an expert by doing that? Oh, you bet it did because now I can add that to my resume, to my title, and now that my show's airing and nearly 300 communities around the US and internationally, a lot of people are beginning to hear about me that in cities I never would have perhaps never have gone to or traveled to. Yeah, I think it's great. That's why I wanted to make sure for you to talk about it. I just want to also say I'm just going to just again for everyone, my guest is Bill Corbett, and we're talking about how to start a speaking business. This is www start a speaking business.com, and the book is called From the Soapbox to the Stage. I just want to say also, because we're only going to get a chance to cover a small piece of this, but there's a lot to this book. There's a lot of content in here, correct? Oh, there's lots of it. It actually started out as an ebook and then when I realized there's so many steps to the process to to build your platform and become that speaker and end up turning into a 240 page book. I mean, that's the thing. So you really take the reader, I mean, this really has everything you need to start from day one. I think I might want to speak, what should I do all the way, all the way through things? How do I put together, how do I get a headshot? How do I get out there in the press? How do I actually do the speech? And then you even get into creating audio and video products. Yeah, everybody has a message no matter what it sounds like we all have a message. So the book takes you from standing on a soapbox, so to speak, of sending your message to just your family or your workplace, all the way to standing on a stage with thousands in the audience if you want to go that far. But you don't have to because I know some people who are speakers just in their own community and they love just doing that. It's funny, you probably have heard this story, and I can't remember who it was that I heard it from, but it's always stuck with me. There was a speaker who he went to go speak and was just, it was like a thousand people in the audience, and somebody came over afterwards and said to him, I just want you to know that everything you said today, I just needed to hear. And it was just exactly the message that I needed to hear to make a difference in my life. And the speaker said, then you are the one that I came here for. And I always thought about that when I've done speeches that we really are, it really, it is for ourself, but it's for other people because we can have an impact on people in a way that we would never possibly know people that we would never meet in our regular life and get our message out. And even if it's one person, what a difference that can make. You're right. And with your show, with Making Change the title, it's important to know that everyone we meet, if you begin to open yourself to realize that everyone you meet is either a student or your teacher and you'd be open to that, amazing things will happen. So lemme ask you this. Obviously when people will want to get the book, how can they go ahead and get the book? They can get it right from Start us speaking business.com. All the links are there. You can read the first couple of chapters for free and Jot, download it. You can look at the table of contents is there, and you can see all the endorsements I've gotten for the book. There's really no other book on the market like this. There's been a huge need for this for a long time, and I'm so excited that I was able to become the messenger to put it out there. And you said this really started from people coming up to you and saying, how can I do what you're doing? So many people were dissatisfied with their lives and they come up to me on breaks when I was doing my trainings or my lectures or my keynotes and saying, this was awesome. I envision myself doing this. I love to do this, and how possible is it for me? What steps would I go through? And I've been hearing that for several years until finally I got the nudge and the universe just came all together and said, Hey, sit down and write it. Hurry up. People are waiting to hear the message. And I just want to give you the last word to also, you can also direct people if people are interested in your work with the work you've been doing for years about raising cooperative kids. Yeah. I just wanted to give you the last word about anything you'd like to say about the book, and also if you want to just even direct people also to your other site as well. Thanks. Yeah. My passion is with helping parents or caregivers of children from 18 months to 18 years of age because it is really difficult today. So they can learn more about my program@cooperativekids.com. You just type in cooperative kids.com. It'll give you all the information on my work. There's tons and tons of free stuff right there on the website. It's not even about selling anything. You can buy my printing books if you like, but you don't have to. I've got all my free articles, podcasts are on there, the television show you can watch for free. And if you want to learn more about me as a speaker and to see what I'm doing, you can reach me@billcorbett.com. We'll give you all the information. And from that, you can see how I built my speaking business as well. Bill Corbett, such a pleasure to have you on, and it's always great to have someone who's a professional speaker and host themselves. It just makes it so much easier, Mike. It's like autopilot. So thank you so much for, thanks so much for making my job so easy today. When you are presenting something that ignites the passion in you, everything changes. The topic is delivered effectively. The audience is receptive, and you as a speaker feel so complete and aligned with yourself and your message. So figure out what your message is and start putting it together to change the lives of others. This recording is the property of Bill Corbett and the Get Paid To Speak podcast copyright 2023, all rights reserved.