Lynn & Tony Know
Lynn & Tony Know
The Miracle of Baby _____
Life changes in the most unexpected ways. After months of absence from our podcast, we're back with a birth story that's as dramatic as it is meaningful. Our journey to baby number three began in the aftermath of October 7th, a day that fundamentally changed how we viewed the world and our place in it. Amidst grief and trauma, we felt a spiritual calling to bring another Jewish child into the world, despite having previously considered our family complete.
What followed was a whirlwind pregnancy at age 42 and a birth experience that defied all expectations. From false alarms and desperate attempts to naturally induce labor (including a memorable prenatal massage from a therapist who looked like Mr. T!), to a middle-of-the-night rush to the hospital and a delivery that happened in just three minutes flat—the entire experience was intense, terrifying, and beautiful all at once.
The drama didn't end with delivery, as we discovered the umbilical cord had been wrapped around our daughter's neck, explaining the urgency that filled the delivery room. And later, complications from the epidural sent us back to the hospital for an emergency procedure. Through it all, we felt guided by something greater than ourselves, from the serendipitous timing of having our regular doctor on call to the arrival of family support just when we needed it most.
We share the deeply personal decision behind naming our daughter Arielle Eden, honoring two hostages who lost their live, a young boy and a young woman with whom I felt a special connection despite never having met. This episode isn't just about childbirth; it's about finding hope and purpose amidst tragedy, making spiritual decisions in a material world, and completing our family in the most unexpected way.
Whether you're planning a family, expanding one, or simply curious about the messy, beautiful reality of bringing new life into the world, join us for this raw, emotional conversation about our newest addition and the remarkable circumstances of her arrival.
Your hosts: @lynnhazan_ and @tonydoesknow
follow us on social @ltkpod!
Hey, welcome to the Lynn and Tony Know podcast. I'm your host, Lynn.
Speaker 2:And I'm Tony. We are both wellness coaches and married with kids.
Speaker 1:Join us as we talk about all things health, wellness, relationships, life hacks, parenting and everything in between, unfiltered. Thanks for listening and let's get into it. Welcome to the show.
Speaker 2:Welcome back. I don't know. It's kind of weird to say welcome back. We've been gone for about a minute, so we kind of just disappeared sort of.
Speaker 1:Our last episode was about our four-year wedding anniversary, which is end of october really, yeah, yeah, yeah, you look this up I just remember it being our last episode, and then just life happened, um, I stopped sleeping like yeah I stopped sleeping and I was like really taking a lot of, I don't want to like get too into it, but um, that's not what this one's about that's not what we're not talking about.
Speaker 1:Insomnia now, but I'm better, um. And then a couple of months later, surprise, we found out that we were expecting baby number three, who's sleeping right now in my arms. She exists and you know pregnancy and everything. But we wanted to come back and share the birth story figure. This is the best kind of outlet to talk about everything that went down.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean, even if nobody heard this, this is something that I would want on a permanent record because, quite frankly, it was insane yeah for me to witness.
Speaker 1:It was nuts the whole thing and also like, as time goes on, you start forgetting details. So like, yeah, like you know, we're four days postpartum, so we wanted to kind of sit and record everything. So we have it you can also. You know, maybe're four days postpartum, so we wanted to kind of sit and record everything. So we have it you can also, you know, maybe get some tips and tricks and whatever. Uh, from our experience. And yeah, where do you want to start?
Speaker 2:well, we could. We could start with the week before you. We had a false alarm yeah, not a false. Well yeah like a. Yeah had a false alarm. Yes, not a false. Well, yeah like a. Yeah like a false alarm.
Speaker 1:Essentially, so at 38 weeks.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:I, it's embarrassing. I, oh, she's gonna, she's gonna. We're gonna have to take some pauses.
Speaker 2:That's okay.
Speaker 1:So at 38 weeks. All right, we have a third host today, all good so at 38 weeks I um like woke up in the morning like early in the morning. I felt really wet and I didn't understand what was going on.
Speaker 1:And then it was happening like throughout the day and I was like, okay, either either my water broke or I just you're peed myself yeah and it's weird because you normally feel like if you're peeing yourself, like you feel it right, but like I was just like wet, you know, and so I I emailed my doctor and I was like you know, this is what's happening and she's like she should come in and made immediately. So it was like wednesday night, tony comes home and I'm like I have to go to the hospital because I think maybe my water broke I'm not sure, you know and so I went in and of course, it turns out that it was. In fact, I urinated myself, in fact, and it was definitely very humbling.
Speaker 2:Can't take that chance. Yeah, you can't. You can't take chances, it's just like it was.
Speaker 1:It's a schlep Like it's Mount Sinai in in, you know, new York city with the drive, and we had Noah. We didn't have you in New York City. We had to drive and we had Noah. We didn't have a babysitter or anything like that. It was a little stressful. Then there was the thought of oh, am I going to have to stay? I don't have anything, I'm not ready.
Speaker 2:Well, back it up. That wasn't a thought that was put forth by the intake person.
Speaker 1:We have bad luck with intake people like, if you listen to the birth, noah's birth story, we just have bad luck with the admin not even bad luck.
Speaker 2:It's just like kind of incompetent, incompetent they're really sweet but like incompetent.
Speaker 1:So I, I check in and she's like, uh, she's asking me what the problem is. I was like, oh, my doctor told me to come. Like I, you know, it might be my water broke or I peed myself, I'm not sure. And she's like, oh well, you're 38 weeks, you might not be leaving this hospital. I'm like panicking.
Speaker 2:She's panicking and I'm downstairs because I have Noah and they won't let you up to that floor with a kid. So I'm stuck downstairs and she texts me the. The secretary says I might have to stay and I'm like why is the secretary saying that? So, of course. Then it's like, okay, great, uh, that's, if that's a possibility, I gotta. I gotta take noah home and I gotta start making preparations, because nobody's here like it's just me and noah. And I gotta start making moves to get noah covered. If I, if this is, if she's gonna have to stay, so I go home yeah, I was like go home put noah down worst case, I'll uber home and we'll figure it out that's best case actually
Speaker 1:worst case is you get stuck there yeah, and then, yeah, and that's what will happen. They're like everything's fine, you can go home, um, but you're, you know, three centimeters and and that was it. I went home and and then it was like okay, like let's get this. But then, you know, I was like all right, like it's time to get things moving. I was at you know, a couple days, like a day or two later I was like ready to that you know what.
Speaker 2:Like that, that whole dry run was like kind of made it real, like we were definitely in any day now territory where before it was like you know soon, it's definitely soon, we know that. But then you know, going to the hospital, driving the route that we're going to drive, and then the possibility, even if the person doesn't have a medical degree, that she might have to stay, made it like, oh, we're at, we're at that point, it's time to be very ready yeah, it's time to be ready to go, yeah, and and then it's like it's kind of a mind fuck is, if you're at the end of pregnancy and you're like ready to go, you're just like let this be it because I can't do this anymore.
Speaker 1:But at the same time, you know, we weren't ready. Like we we were waiting for Tony's parents to come and so that they can help out with Noah, like we have other kids that we need to consider.
Speaker 2:It's not like we can just like All of our backup plans were gone Right. Pretty much for that weekend, so.
Speaker 1:Tony was like telling literally talking to the baby in my stomach please wait for the 26th of August. I'm like, just come whenever you want to come.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:But anyway. So the 25th rolls around Now. Oh yes, we're talking about you.
Speaker 2:Yes, my, love.
Speaker 1:The 25th rolls around and I'm like, okay, tomorrow's the 26th. Now I also have concert tickets to go see Oasis. Now we bought these tickets, everybody knows. Now I bought these tickets in December when, when they came out and you know, a huge Oasis fan like I'm talking like fan club, like super geeky, like posters of Noel Gallagher I was a Noel fan, like in love with him, you know do you have to pick one?
Speaker 2:as a young fan of oasis, are you supposed to like you team?
Speaker 1:like, a like, a line with one but and no like. Although liam is the like front front singer, noel writes all the songs okay, so they both have their you know but? And I was like no is more talented and everybody's like in love with liam, so if I had a chance, I would have a chance with no. That was like my logic as a as a 12 year old like you were real practical about your fan.
Speaker 2:I was like I was practical.
Speaker 1:Okay, I was like I'm more of a no fan, like I'm team no and um, anyway, huge fan, like once in a lifetime concert they're coming to met life, which is 20 minutes away from here, have to go, bought the tickets, spend an arm and a leg, fuck it like we're going. This is my bucket list concert. And so we bought the tickets and then literally a month later, found out, um, I'm pregnant and I'm literally due three days after this concert. So the clock is fucking ticking. It's august 25. Tony's parents are arriving august 26. Let it's operation get this baby out now. Throughout my whole pregnancy, at a very active pregnancy, I walked a lot, I, I, I strength trained, I ate like nutritious, nutritiously. So I think being active really helps the process you know also third baby too, right.
Speaker 1:So it's, uh august 25th and I was like, okay, we, I'm doing everything that I possibly can to get this baby out. Your parents arrived august 26th, so august 25th, uh, I did the like I was eating dates did everything I walked well, so like that's I did. I did most of everything on the 26th, but on the 25th I was like we need to have sex, you know, because sex helps did that and sex helps like induce labor, like the sperm is, is like a, I don't know whatever it was also fun
Speaker 1:it was also fun and I was like it's gonna be six weeks till we have sex again. Let's have sex, had sex, I was like, oh, you know, maybe you know get cracked good, like I'm being um, which he did eventually. It worked. But anyway, it was fun, we had fun and and then the 26 in the morning I was like it's fucking go time. I'm treating this today like a full-time job. Now in the morning I woke up and, uh, I had a school like thing for noah's, like preschool that she's going to. So I went, you know, went to hoboken and I was like, instead of ubering home, I'm gonna walk home. And I walked all the way from hoboken to the heights and I don't know if you guys know the like these if you live in the area. There's these diabolical stairs that go from Hoboken to the Heights and they're like intense.
Speaker 2:Famous Steve Fulop ad.
Speaker 1:Yeah, famous. Yeah, steve Fulop, our mayor, did an ad like running up the stairs like Rocky style, right, did those steps, walked home. It was grueling, it was intense. I was in a dress too and like flip flops, like what a weirdo. I was just like so determined.
Speaker 2:You were determined.
Speaker 1:Get home, His family, his parents arrive. I went to. We went to get a deli sandwiches. I ate a deli sandwich.
Speaker 2:Apparently, like you know, deli sandwiches. What else did we have that morning? There was something else, because I didn't go in till after I don't remember. I don't remember. I don't remember either. Oh no, no, I picked, I picked my parents up from the airport, came back right, and then you were walking back and then I went to work after that yeah and on my way just walking to the pass station, I believe you texted me and said by the way, yeah, I'm having some contractions some contractions I was having some contractions, very, very minor.
Speaker 1:And you know, when you're at the end of pregnancy you're like every twinge is like is this it? Is this it? So I was like not sure you know what I mean. I was like, okay, just letting you know it could happen today. I have no idea, you know. Yeah, and he's like, okay, keep me posted. I walk home, his parents are home, they get me a deli sandwich. Slam that.
Speaker 1:I was like maybe this will let you know, maybe this will help me go into labor, had some dates. And then I was like you know what? I'm going to schedule a massage. I'm going to schedule a massage Because, you know, my in-laws are here. I'm gonna schedule a last minute massage and somebody in my DMS recommended this like specific massage place that, uh, they offer, you know, prenatal massages to induce labor and for, like, women who are past like 38 weeks or 39 weeks. So I make the massage. I, you know, make the massage and I select, you know, first, available practitioner, not even not thinking twice, like I don't know, you know. And and I walked to hoboken. I was like, okay, we're walking, we're walking again, we're getting this baby down, you know this is after the stairs, after the stairs.
Speaker 1:Yeah eight, I rested second trip to hoboken walking, you know, walking to hoboken. And so I walked to hoboken. I walked to this you know massage place and there was like some scheduling issues and whatever. It was fine. Like I had to wait like 30 minutes and then this guy comes in. He literally looks like Mr T and he's like lynn. Uh, he's like lynn, I'm ready for you. And I'm like in my head, I'm thinking my head, I'm like this is the guy that's gonna give me a prenatal massage.
Speaker 1:And normally I like go for women. Like you know, I usually feel more comfortable for women, with women. But like I was desperate at this point. I was like you know what, whatever, like he must know what he's doing. He, this is like a place where they get pregnant women. He probably, you know, probably like he's probably like tough and he'll get this baby out. Yeah, and mr t went to town and he knew so much about pregnancy. It was like the weirdest thing you know. And he was like really new. He's like oh, how far along are you? And da, da, da and like are you feeling any contractions or like any? You know, is this like he was very good, he was very good at what he he did and gave me a really good massage and I did like 70. It was like 75 minutes then. Then what did we do? We came home. Like you picked me up, we came home right, I picked you up from the massage.
Speaker 2:We came home.
Speaker 1:Yes, came home and then we were like okay, you know his parents are here, um, noah's taken care of. It's like a good opportunity for us to go on like a mini date. Right, yeah, now I didn't want to go for like any dinner or the city. I was just like let's go back to hoboken and let's go on to the waterfront and let's go get snacks at like nuts factory and just like chill. And which is what we did.
Speaker 2:We drove to hoboken, we walked around stories already changed from then till now because I made the plans okay, you made the plans but.
Speaker 1:I said let's go sit on the waterfront you said let's go to a waterfront and I said, let's go to hoboken waterfront because we can stop at nuts factory. Eighty dollars worth of nuts right, which is what we we did. And then we sat at the waterfront and it was like super romantic and beautiful and kind of was like okay, like this feels like this is the last date before we become parents of three kids. Which we were right and that was it. We went home.
Speaker 2:We went home and normal night, like just normal, went to bed normal, went to bed. Whatever crossword puzzle yep, that's our new thing, by the way, we do crossword puzzles before bed we do, we haven't since we, we, we had the baby, but yes, uh, it was just normal everything was normal until and then we go to sleep and I'm trying to fall asleep and again I'm.
Speaker 1:You know I have sleep issues, right. We already determined that some nights are good, and I know drama, and then other nights are really hard for me to get to sleep and it's just, it's like a very up and down battle. Maybe one day I'll talk more detail about it, but it's, it's. It's been a struggle, right. So I'm struggling to to fall asleep, but I think I do end up like dozing off and then I get startled awake and I wet myself again and I'm like and I don't feel like, and I just wake up and I'm like wet, like, and I'm like what the fuck? Like what's happening, you know? So I go, I'll clean myself up, I change. And that's when the contract and then the contraction started I don't think I knew about that part yeah, and that's when the contract and then the contraction started.
Speaker 1:I don't think I knew about that part, yeah, and that's when the contraction started and I you know the I was trying to you know I didn't wake tony up and I was just like, okay, maybe this will pass, maybe it's just, you know, braxton hicks or whatever, because it felt kind of braxton hick key and then. But it was like a little bit more intense and that was it. After like it started at like 11 o'clock and then after like 40 minutes, I was like I started moaning and I was in pain. I was like babe, I think this is it like yeah, I think it's time.
Speaker 1:And so he wakes up and I tell him call you, know my doctor. Yeah, but it felt like urgent, like I felt like I was. It was like if it wasn't like the like when I was in labor with noah, where we had time like we had felt like the contractions were like less intense, but I but they were like regular.
Speaker 1:This time the contractions like hit me. They hit me like right away, super quick, and I was panicking and tony's like taking his sweet ass time. Like I go to the bathroom to like get myself ready and I come back to the room and he's just like in the closet, like just standing there. I'm like what the fuck are you doing? Just pack up. We got to go to the car like right now.
Speaker 2:See, I've only had one other experience to base my speed on, and it was so casual. I remember the video. I'm like this seemed pretty tame.
Speaker 1:And it wasn't like that. I was like get your ass to the car, like we need to go to the car right now. You know, and usually I'm very kind with my husband, like very sweet. But this time I was like move your fucking ass, we're going into the. I'm going into the car right now. I don't care if you forget anything, we're delivering in New York City. Whatever you need, whatever you forget, you'll find it. It's OK. Okay, let's go. Yeah, right, I grab a protein bar because I was like I'm not fucking around, I need my energy. We go to the car, we go to the car and and that drive to new york city with the potholes while you're having contractions not fun diabolical but thankfully it was like quick, like we got there I was super quick.
Speaker 2:It took us 20 minutes because this is like it was yeah, midnight we got there quick.
Speaker 1:And then we get to the you know the same admin and like I'm, I'm, I'm moaning, I'm screaming. I'm like, yeah, I'm ready. And as soon as I walked in there, I was like I want the epidural put me on the list immediately now, since this is my third kid, I have experience, I know how labor and delivery works at this point and I know that there is a wait list for the epidural.
Speaker 2:Or there can be. You have no idea how many people are delivering. You don't know how many people are delivering that night.
Speaker 1:So if they have a busy night, you know it takes time to get down the list of the people who need epidurals. So I wanted to make sure that everybody in that fucking floor knew I was my business and I am ready and I want the epidural. And they, they're, they're good, they're like right away. Everyone like as soon as they took me back. Then everybody knew oh, you want the epidural, you're ready for I'm like, yes, so if you know that you want to get the epidural, as soon as you walk into the hospital, just say that you want the epidural and they take me back and they check how many centimeters dilated I am. The nurses were hilarious. We were chatting and just like making jokes and they're like oh, you know what you're doing, girl, like your experience like third kid, blah, blah, blah. Uh, at that point it was like six cent five centimeters, yeah, five centimeters dilated, which is like active labor, and they're like yep, you're not leaving here without a baby.
Speaker 2:I was like no shit, no other crucial point when, when we called originally to find out hey, should we go in? Yeah, you call your ob gyn's office, yeah, and then they direct you to whoever is on call, which that night happened just happened. Oh my god to be our doctor who delivered Mia. So this is like our person right. This is the person that we want, and it just happened to be on the night that she is on call.
Speaker 1:It was the luckiest thing ever.
Speaker 2:It was crazy.
Speaker 1:And yeah. So the two nurses checked me out. They're like, okay, you're ready to go? I'm joking around with them and super sweet. And they're like, oh, ready to go, I'm joking around with them and super sweet. And they're like, oh, you want the epidural. Like oh, like we heard you. And like, oh, you know, like one of the nurses came in. She's like we heard you and we were like hoping that, like oh, hopefully it's a full term.
Speaker 1:you know, because, like, I'm sure they get a lot of like false alarms so they were like happy that I was like ready to go, um, and and yeah, and then, and then they bring me into the room and everything happened. So fast, so fast so yeah, dr khan comes in and she's like you have five hours to deliver this well, she was just like I'm she.
Speaker 2:We were like you were so glad you're on call, and she was like I'm on call for the next five hours and I'm like, oh shit.
Speaker 1:And she's like, oh, we'll be fine I'm like we'll definitely get this baby because like last time we went in with Noah it was 18 hours of labor, right.
Speaker 2:So like I'm like, oh we're like she's not going to be here, like that sucks.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And she's like no, we're going to knock this out. And I'm like, okay, Okay.
Speaker 1:Yeah, exactly Tony's like okay, and and then the contractions are getting like really intense and I was like I can't because like I didn't mentally prepare myself to do anything, to do like natural labor, you know what I mean. Like I just didn't prepare, I just wanted the pain meds. Like I was just like I already resolved myself to getting the epidural for previous pregnancies. I was like gonna try to work through it, but like this one I didn't want to. I also didn't have the energy again. I haven't. You know it's been nine months since I've had like a consistent good night's sleep. I don't have the energy to push through contractions.
Speaker 1:Like give me the drugs yeah so I was like when's the epidural guy coming?
Speaker 2:yeah, that was the.
Speaker 1:That was the next thing, that was the next thing and then so I get the epidural, which we'll talk about later yeah, two 12 year olds roll in to give us the epidural Doogie. Howser, I don't care at this point, I'm like just give it to me whatever I get the epidural, great, I'm good now you know.
Speaker 2:And then they're like. Basically they're like okay, just chill for a few hours. At that point I went out to get some coffee and some waters and some snacks or whatever, just to kind of get prepared to buckle in for the long haul which I thought.
Speaker 1:I thought I was going to just chill, have the epidural take a nap, like be able to like sleep a little bit, watch some Grey's Anatomy, like just chill out, Right.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And at that point it was like what time? And what time was like?
Speaker 2:probably like I got back from going out to gather stuff must have been around 2, 30 or so right somewhere around 2 30 we settle into the room a little bit so it's like 2, 45, 2, 50 am yeah and I'm like nodding off, but then I hear chilling again.
Speaker 1:This is my third baby. I know what's going on and this happened with mia, with my first baby. I know when the like you can hear the baby's heart rate and it's like consistent, like and then real fast, and then you start hearing it drop.
Speaker 1:And then I was like, fuck the baby's heart rate. Yes, and I knew right away, and I was like, okay, it might be nothing, just relax. Don't like, don't panic, they know what they're doing. And of course, uh, a doctor came in and and like, I hear the like hustle and bustle. They're like page dr khan, page dr khan.
Speaker 2:And I was like, yeah, we got it, we got a doctor, we got the peds doctor, we got dr khan we had two nurses. You know, dr khan comes in and she's like we're delivering this baby yeah, no, she just walks in with, like you know, full get up on. It was like you're ready to go ready. I was like what the fuck it's like yeah, we've been here for oh, and before that they did?
Speaker 1:they broke my water. They broke my water. I forgot that they broke my water. And she's like you're, you know, eight centimeters dilated or whatever, nine. And then, like an hour later, it's like okay, okay, you got to push. Oh, my God.
Speaker 2:But they get in, but she rolls in like, all right, we're doing this. Basically, yeah, we have to get her out now. We have to go now. And she says I'm going to give you a test. Push, Right. We didn't know at that time what the test was for.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:The test push, as it turned out, was a test to see if she could get any movement at all, because we're talking station zero, no crowning at all, the baby's not coming through in the slightest. And Dr Khan was basically giving Lynn a test push to see if we were going to deliver it naturally, or if we were going to the OR. That was it. Those were the two options. She gave one test push and we didn't know. We didn't know at the time that those were the stakes, but that's what we found out later was that was what we were up against in that moment.
Speaker 2:And she gave a test push and apparently the baby just like lurched forward. And she said one more, and like you were like teeth gritting, and of course you can't, you don't know, like you have no idea I have no idea what's going on, but I can't feel I could see like five doctors like all looking at my vagina, basically like staring down the barrel of baby harry it's so weird, it's such a weird, it's so weird.
Speaker 1:It's like like tony's like at my head and uh, there's just like a bunch of doctors just staring at my vagina like I haven't seen my vagina in a year, okay, and they're all staring like I, you know, like I haven't shaved down, like I can't like see, so like it's probably there's like patches, I don't know, it's probably a mess, whatever, but they're all staring at it and like first row concert tickets and and I see some panic in their eyes, like I do see, but like in my mind it's intense, it's not, it's not.
Speaker 2:I didn't see panic. I saw urgency. It was more urgent than intensity. Yeah, it was like in my head.
Speaker 1:I was like everything's going to be okay, everything's good. I know everything's going to be okay. Like I felt God. I I felt God. I know this is cliche, I like I hate being cliche, but I felt like God Hashem like there with me. You know what I mean, because the whole, you know the fact that Dr Khan was there and just the way the fact, the baby waited till our you know, tony's parents were here. Like everything was serendipitous in a way.
Speaker 2:This was like the last day, probably ish, maybe not, but we're in that very narrow window of she has to come out now for you to recover enough to go to oasis.
Speaker 1:Yeah, exactly, she did like yeah, she showed up at the right time and they're all lit up and and she's like you need to push, you need to get this baby out, like right now. Now I can't feel my legs because of the epidural and I'm just pushing for the like, just pushing, and I'm like I literally like my brain, like I literally squeezed everything and like I don't know what's going on down there again, I don't feel my legs and I'm just pushing with all my energy, you know, and I pushed her out in three minutes.
Speaker 2:Three minutes yeah.
Speaker 1:Three minutes.
Speaker 2:From 3.14 AM to 3.17 AM, essentially. And then she comes flying out and one of the other doctors is like hey dad, you want to cut the cord, and the cord was around her neck. The cord was. That's why her blood pressure was dropping. Was she got tangled up in the umbilical cord, which is, you know, a thing that can happen?
Speaker 1:for sure, it's a lot more common than you think but yes it can end up in something tragic, but we were very lucky we were very lucky and we had a good you know. And dr khan is just amazing, she's amazing dm me if you want her info.
Speaker 2:I don't know if she's taking any new patients, but yes she's amazing awesome and uh but yeah, they were like dad, do you want to cut the cord? No, because that means like I got to go around to the other side. No, and cut the cord. I'm like no, no, thank you.
Speaker 1:You're in the team where tony doesn't look at what's going on, like I want to keep my vagina a mystery you guys are the professionals like yeah and then she said and then she was like that because she knows I watch gray's anatomy and she's like.
Speaker 2:That was like kind of like on gray's anatomy and I was laughing she was like, yeah, that that was about as close as it gets to Grey's Anatomy level and baby was born she was born, she just came out and we were just sitting there like it's, like what the fuck just happened?
Speaker 2:we have been in this hospital for less than three hours. We expected, you know, we expected to chill for a while, set up shop, nest a little bit and then, you know, do the thing, maybe 10 hours later, 8 hours later, I don't know, 6 at the earliest, but less than 3 hours in the hospital and we have a baby and it was just like she made a dramatic entrance. So dramatic.
Speaker 1:And that was it, and we met her and I was just like all right.
Speaker 2:Then we just hung out for one night. The other thing that started happening was the anesthesiologist that administered.
Speaker 1:Doogie Howser. Well not him at first. Doogie Howser's bestie.
Speaker 2:There's the attending, and then there was either a resident or probably a resident, I don't have any idea. But the guy that administered the epidural after the birth came in and said hey, just wanted to check and see if you had any headaches going on. There's a chance, based on how the epidural was administered, that you might have some headaches. And not only did he ask, but his attending asked, and then, like the nurses kept asking too. So after a while it became this thing. It was like we weren't there for that long before, like four people had asked us how the headaches were, and the whole time it was all good. It was all good, like you're just like a normal headache, but nothing crazy, right. And then the next day we were discharged at like one o'clock or whatever it was, and then we came home, uh. And then the next day was when yeah, I started feeling horrible.
Speaker 2:I had a horrible headache things started to get bad, yeah, and the headaches worse. And the difference was we were told at one point and we figured out that if you get an epidural and this is not to scare anybody, because I think but it's good for everybody to know.
Speaker 1:It's good for everybody to know, and I knew it comes with risk.
Speaker 2:That's even the day you would still get it right.
Speaker 1:Yes, absolutely.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so if you go too far with the needle for an epidural, you run the risk of piercing the dural.
Speaker 1:Again, it sounds scarier than it is because I was really scared, but after learning more about it, it's pretty common. It happens to one in a hundred people.
Speaker 2:It's not crazy, but it's just something that can happen. Right, it can be a weird placement. Everybody's spine is different. It's not the simplest thing in the world and you can pierce it and spinal fluid could leak out. During the epidural procedure, which I didn't know. That's what happened, but I saw the attending who was there watching the procedure being done, and he looked over at the same time as the guy looked back at him and I knew that something happened. But I couldn't. I have no idea what's going on behind her back. And then so, basically, the her headaches started to get very, very bad. And the difference with a regular headache and this is if you're standing up, it's worse, if you're laying down, it's better. When she started standing up the second day home, it started getting very bad. So they told us ultimately you can come back in, we've got a procedure, we can do that. That'll probably'll probably fix it. Um, if it gets worse and then you know, about five o'clock that evening she was like it's worse, we need to go in.
Speaker 1:And I was an excruciating pain.
Speaker 2:Well, I mean you, you, the the 30 minutes between here and the hospital, things escalated for you like dramatically, like crazy bad. So we had to go back to the hospital two days later and have what's called a blood patch done, which they basically run a line from your arm of blood back. It's basically like getting an epidural again the needle goes back in your spine and the blood ultimately clots, whatever they nicked yeah, and I felt better, but I still have like a lingering headache, like I have a headache now like it's just, it'll go away it's a lingering headache but, like it also could be from sleep deprivation, it could be from dehydration.
Speaker 1:She's sucking the life out of me. So you know, childbirth is serious. It's nothing to be afraid of, but things do happen and I'm, you know, really grateful for the doctors at mount sinai. I'm really grateful for the experience. You know the experience overall was was great, you know, it know the experience overall was great.
Speaker 2:You know, it was a great experience. The staff was great, the hospital was great, I had a good original delivery my third baby. I'm feeling okay Today. You're feeling okay. Yesterday I did not feel.
Speaker 1:But again it's like the journey is not linear and it's just really being patient Postpartum. I mean, with Noah it took me a year and a half, two years to feel like back to myself. You know, it takes time, like you're, you're growing a human, you're breastfeeding that. Like I don't know her, she's a stranger, she doesn't know me, we're fucking strangers to each other, like, yeah, she was in my belly, but we don't like I don't know what she. You know, we're still trying to figure out like a rhythm and it's very early, yeah, and it's just. You know, I'm grateful that I have like the support and tony's been amazing and tony's family's been amazing. It's really just like a day-by-day process, you know, but I feel like our family is complete yeah, it very much feels like I'm sure a lot of people want to know.
Speaker 1:First of all, they want to know the name but, they also want to know why you know, because whenever we you know, why do we have the third kid?
Speaker 2:we talked about it a little bit. I mean, online, we've talked about it, I know that. But no, this one, you know this was not something we had strongly considered doing at all. In fact, you know we pretty much had determined not with any real conversation about it. But we, we were done like we were good, we had noah, we have mia, we're, we're sweet we're good we have a three-bedroom home you know like a car in the car, it all makes sense it all makes sense.
Speaker 1:Like we, you know there's stuff that we want to do and accomplish in in our careers and life and whatever you know. So, like it was almost so sure that, like I gave away all of Noah's newborn stuff, but I did hold on to some other stuff, which is weird. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:Like I held on to my pregnancy pillow. I wasn't ready to like let go of that, which is interesting. But you know we were, we were, and you know I'm not I'm not a spring chicken Like I'm 42 now and when I had Noah I was 39. It was like okay, like that's it, like that was our window and let's you know, move on, let's travel, let's do fun stuff with the family. And then October 7th happened. You know, october 7th, and I was actually planning on launching a business October 15, like a new business, a health coaching business, like I had everything done and I, you know, paid a business coach, everything I had, like you know the business name. I had like the course that I was going to do this online course and and do like private clients, and I had this whole plan. And then October 7 happened and it just changed everything. You know it changed. You know, for a long time I couldn't do anything right. I was just stuck in the trauma of it and the you know, like it was just.
Speaker 1:It changed how I feel about the world, how I connect to people. It changed how I just. You know it was the most traumatic thing that could ever happen and I wasn't even there. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:But, as a Jewish person and Israeli, and the hatred and the anti-Semitism that came afterwards, and seeing people that you've had relationships with for many years kind of turn their backs on you, and it was a very difficult, very heartbreaking and difficult time and I was just like, okay, I'm just going to do, what I need to do is that run my marketing agency and take care of Noah and take care of Mia and and find you know, moments of joy in between. But I was really like in it, like it's like a dark cloud kind of just like following you around everywhere, right, and then on top of that, you know, so then the insomnia and all that stuff.
Speaker 2:So it was a really difficult time for for both of us yeah, but ultimately we ended up having a conversation like not even so it happened after on the anniversary of oct 7th, like a few days after the anniversary.
Speaker 1:So I remember going to a ceremony in New York City and a synagogue on the. It was a commitment commemoration for October 7. And I went actually for a nonprofit organization that I do work for. So I was there for work and I was like I wasn't like necessarily there to like mourn, it was just like I'm there to do my job and to get content and all that stuff. And I remember grabbing whatever videos I needed to and then putting my phone away and then I was just like lost in the in the whole like evening and all the speakers. And I remember one of the speakers.
Speaker 1:He was a father of an IDF soldier who died on October 7th and he he was killed by Hamas and he was protecting innocent civilians and his father was just telling stories about his son and how, what a wonderful man he was, what a you know patriot he was and how he was excited to join the army. Because if it meant, you know, the old lady sitting, you know, on a bench, that she could feel safe, then that made him feel good. It was something along those lines and it broke. I don't know why, but that broke me, hearing the father speak about his son, and I was thinking in my head what can I do? I feel helpless. Everything is so bad. What can I do? I feel helpless. Everything is so bad.
Speaker 1:All this death, you know, all this trauma that the Jewish people and Israelis are dealing with now, and all this hatred, what can I do? And it was like a voice in my head. It's like more Jewish babies, have another Jewish baby. That's what you can do. You're really good at that. You're really good at having raising Jewish babies and you have a husband that supports you and loves you and you can do it together. More Jewish babies. And that was the first time. It was like okay, okay, maybe I'll think about it. You know like it was? Like it was like two voices in my head, like fighting each other, like no, you're done.
Speaker 2:You have your abs, most of your abs, talking.
Speaker 1:Most of my abs were like no, we don't want this, you're skinny now. And then, a few days later, tony was, you know, on his way back from work and he FaceTimed me.
Speaker 2:Sunday and I was doing the dishes.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and he was stuck in traffic and we all started talking about it Wasn't even an in-person conversation, I was like what does it look like?
Speaker 2:It wasn't even 10 minutes long. It was quick too. We just went through all the reasons why not and then the reasons why to do it. And the reasons to do it were all like they weren't logical.
Speaker 1:And they were spiritually driven.
Speaker 2:The reasons not to.
Speaker 1:We're all shallow like money and money and space and travel, and all the reasons were not like rooted in anything meaningful necessarily. And I remember I also even talked to our rabbi. You know like I was like okay, let me, let me get some some spiritual advice here. Um, and I talked to him and he's like he's like if the reasons are, you know, like physical, I understand mental, you know like mental health or things like that. But if your reasons are money and and travel and like superficial things and that's not, that's not a good enough reason you know what I mean.
Speaker 1:And and that was it and I was like okay. So I told tony I was like let's try, let's leave it to god. I'm not, you know, I don't have the energy to do like any sort of ivf or fertility treatments like, if it happens naturally, great, let's give it to my 42nd birthday.
Speaker 2:We'll have fun, we'll have sex, which was literally a month ago yeah, it'll be great, you know we'll.
Speaker 1:We'll just leave it to god, leave it to chance. Yeah, if it happens, great. If it doesn't happen, we say we did it. You know what I mean? Yeah, and so we did. And that was like we started trying, like november, yeah, I guess. And I found out I was pregnant on december 31st, on new year's eve. Should have waited one day so you could have enjoyed new year's eve. I know I should have not, I guess, and I found out I was pregnant on December 31st, on.
Speaker 2:New Year's Eve. New Year's Eve should have waited one day, so you could have enjoyed New Year's Eve I know I should have not taken that test on New Year's Eve yeah, and that was it, and we were pregnant.
Speaker 1:I'm very, and again, a very great like I want to you know disclaimer like I understand how hard. I know so many women who struggle, men, women and men who struggle with their fertility and who have problems getting pregnant and have to go through hell to get that baby, that bundle of joy, and it might be triggering to hear a 41-year-old woman just getting pregnant after one or two tries. I'm very aware of that and I'm super obviously grateful.
Speaker 2:And empathetic to anybody that you know. Yeah, absolutely for sure, for sure.
Speaker 1:All that being said, yeah, we're not gonna have a fourth, because that would mentally destroy you and I think hashem was like you're done after this, um giving me doogie hauser for my epidural guy, but no um he didn't do it, he was just watching um, we're good he was free is great, you know we, our family is complete. And let's get to the name.
Speaker 1:You know we had our baby naming yesterday yeah and so, after I found out that I, so a few months before I found out, which I think was like the little seed, you know what I mean? Sure, and it was kind of like a little seed and little seeds here and there, last August is when they found six of our hostages who were murdered in captivity, and one of them, her name was Eden, and I felt like a connection to her. And I felt like a connection to her because, you know, early on in the war, uh, the hostage forum asked me to do a video about her and I, like, got to like, read about her, that she was like she's a lemon cake, no she was into pilates oh yeah
Speaker 1:she's into pilates and she just likes to dance and she's just this young, beautiful, like 22 year old, who's you know went to a party to dance and was taken hostage and her life got cut short. And I just felt like I don't know like a connection to her, like I knew her, and hearing the devastating news really like it was really hard. It was a really hard week. That week I remember like just feeling like I lost a friend, even though I never met her, I don't know her. I just felt like I lost a friend and she was always like in my, in my mind, you know, um. And then, after we found out that we were pregnant, um, tony and I, that day, the morning that we were on our way to, uh, our first like ultrasound to confirm the you know, I think it's our 12-week old ultrasound, where it's like to make sure the baby's okay and healthy and, you know, growing the way it should.
Speaker 1:That morning we found out about the babies, the two, the two the toddler, who was four years old four years old when he was taken hostage and his baby brother, who was actually the same as Noah's age. So he would be, he would be almost three years old now, if he was still alive. And that was so devastating, cripplingly devastating, and there were so many feelings because here I am, you know, pregnant and happy that I'm pregnant, but at the same time, you know, we hear this news and it was just like so horrifying. And we heard the news and we were literally on our way to the, to the ultrasound, and I look at Tony, I'm like how do you feel about Ariel, for our baby girl's name?
Speaker 2:I don't want to cry, okay.
Speaker 1:And that was it, and we said Ariel, and then I was like middle name Eden, and that's her name.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And that's her name, our little miracle baby. And you know, in the Jewish religion you want to honor people who passed, and normally you honor people who passed in your family, but Jews and Israelis feel like we're all one family.
Speaker 1:We're all a family and losing Ariel and Eden and all the hostages and the 1,200 people that we lost on October 7th and all the soldiers that we lost afterwards they all feel like part of us and if I could have done this one good deed, this one mitzvah, and dedicate my beautiful third baby to these two people, then it feels good, it feels right and she brings us a lot of joy and we're very grateful. And she's Ari, she's our little Ari.
Speaker 2:Yep, I don't know what else to say.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think that's all that needs to be said, that's really all you can say about it.
Speaker 2:It was crazy and perfect all at the same time.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and what's next for us? We don't know, dvd. Maybe we'll continue recording. We'll see it's kind of just like a fun thing that we do to talk to you guys and talk to each other and yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:So stay tuned. Thank you for listening, thank you.