Stacked Keys Podcast
The idea to talk to women who are out there living and making a difference is where the Stacked Keys Podcast was born. There are women who make a difference, but never make a wave while paddling through life. Immediately I can think of a dozen or more who impacted me, but I want more. I want to talk to those I don't know and I want to share with an audience that might need the inspiration to find their own beat. This podcast is to feature women who are impressive in the work world-- or in raising a family -- or who have hobbies that can make us all be encouraged. Want to hear what makes these women passionate and get up in the morning or what they wish they had known earlier in life? Grab your keys and STOMP to your own drum.
Stacked Keys Podcast
Episode 218 -- Laura Flowers -- We All Have Infinite Potential
What happens when a school psychologist with 18 years of experience decides to completely transform her career path? Laura Flowers joins us to share her remarkable journey from education professional to life coach and Reiki master practitioner, revealing the courage it takes to walk away from security toward purpose.
Laura opens up about what compelled her to leave the stability of her psychology career—mounting paperwork, expanding caseloads, and less time actually helping people. Though terrifying to step away from a reliable paycheck and benefits, she describes the energizing joy of finally working with women in transition on her own terms, combining Western psychological principles with Eastern energy healing techniques.
The conversation takes a fascinating turn as Laura explains Reiki energy work and how blocked chakras manifest as both physical ailments and emotional struggles. She shares practical wisdom about the power of stillness and breath, offering listeners simple techniques like box breathing to center themselves in moments of stress. Most compelling is her philosophy on trust—both trusting oneself completely and approaching relationships with open trust until proven otherwise.
Behind Laura's confident guidance lies profound personal experience with life's greatest challenges. She courageously reveals the "massive boulders" she's faced, including losing her mother to cancer at age 23 and the unimaginable pain of losing a child. Rather than letting tragedy define her, Laura has transformed these experiences into a wellspring of empathy, becoming what she calls a "lighthouse"—standing firm and grounded while providing light for others navigating storms.
Ready to explore your own infinite potential? Connect with Laura through her website lauraflowersllc.com for a free discovery call to learn how her unique blend of psychology and energy work can help you create the life you truly desire.
Music "STOMP" used by permission of artist Donica Knight Holdman and Jim Huff
I'm walking all alone down my yellow brick road and I stomp to the beat of my own drum. I got my pockets full of dreams and they're busting at the seams, going boom, boom boom.
Speaker 2:Welcome to Stacked Keys Podcast. I'm your host, amy Stackhouse. This is a podcast to feature women who are impressive in the work world or in raising a family, or who have hobbies that make us all feel encouraged. Want to hear what makes these women passionate to get up in the morning, or what maybe they wish they'd known a little bit earlier in their lives. Grab your keys and stomp to your own drum.
Speaker 1:Whatever you do, it ain't nothing on me, because I'm doing my thing and I hold the key to all my wants and all my dreams Like an old song everything will be all right.
Speaker 2:Today I have a special guest and I can't wait to get talking. We talked just for a minute before we got started and it's so funny the different parts of the country and the different weather and you know how we are as different areas and have different interests, and I just love connecting people and so today I welcome Laura Flowers. Welcome Laura.
Speaker 3:Hi, thank you so much for having me so excited.
Speaker 2:I would like to know right out of the gate, Laura, how do people know you both personally and professionally?
Speaker 3:Oh, my goodness, that's a bit of a story. So I have been I'll start with professionally. I've been a psychologist, a school psychologist, for the past 18 years, and so that has been my professional identity up until recently. So I have in the past year, decided for a multitude of reasons, that I am really feeling called to work with women outside of the school setting. So I have started a life coaching business where I support women who are in transitional phases of their lives, so whether they're looking for a career shift or a relationship shift, or if they're empty nesters and looking to reclaim their identity.
Speaker 3:So I'm kind of pivoting right now from my role as school psychologist and stepping really fully into my role as a life coach. And I've also recently really been delving into energy healing as well. So I am now a Reiki master practitioner and so I offer Reiki services both locally here in town and I'm located in Connecticut and I also offer distance Reiki sessions and I'm able to infuse energy healing into the life coaching work that I do with my clients. So that's a very, very, very quick synopsis of my professional identity. Personally, I am a wife and mother of two amazing boys, brandon and Jack. They're in seventh grade and fourth grade right now, and I'm so proud of them. I'm also a dog mom have to mention my dog here too and I enjoy just spending as much time with my boys, my family, as possible.
Speaker 2:Wow. So you are taking on a whole new identity and sometimes being in the education system and being in that that job is never finished. So for you to step away from that and for being able, you know, sometimes when you have a career and you can say, well, I'm a school psychologist, people automatically go okay and they know how to process that. So is it a scary thing to do to step aside, even at this young age in your career, to make such a huge change?
Speaker 3:You're so sweet for saying young age. There you go. Yes and no, I had been. You know, being in the education profession. It was so fulfilling for me for such a long time.
Speaker 3:But and I'm not sure how much you want to go into this but in recent years the job is not what it was when I started, and what I mean by that is just that my caseload has grown exponentially. My paperwork requirements have grown exponentially. There has also been a lot of like really litigious things happening that have required a lot of time and energy to process, and so I have felt for the past couple of years that my role as a school psychologist I'm not helping the people that I am truly passionate about helping in the ways that I want to help them. I'm spending more times sitting in meetings, I'm spending more times filling out paperwork and just because of the sheer numbers on my caseload, I'm only one person and they're not hiring other professionals to help with the caseload. So it's just it's felt really unfulfilling to me in the past couple of years for those reasons.
Speaker 3:And so when I say yes and no, it's scary. Yes, it's scary because, yes, I'm leaving a very stable, well-paying profession where I know exactly how many days I have off per year, I know what my vacations are, I know how much money is going to be coming in every week, I know that I'm putting into a retirement and I'm walking away from all of that and that is scary. But it's also not scary because I feel so energized and happy and joyful, being able to spend my time, my talents, my passions into really helping people in the ways that I am really lit up by doing so. It's a mixture of being really scared and terrified and then just doing it even though, and feeling all of the good feelings and the confirmations that, yeah, I'm on the right track.
Speaker 2:Wow, and life coaching, you know, that's been kind of a hot topic of late, and some people are qualified to do that and then some people are not. And so how do you differentiate yourself in the noise of what life coaching can maybe be to someone? And maybe we should back up just a little bit what is life coaching to you?
Speaker 3:we should back up just a little bit. What is life coaching to you? Okay, so so life coaching to me is meeting somebody exactly where they are and co-creating with them the future that they want, whatever that is. So it's different, in essence, from therapy, because therapy and counseling we're really looking at a person's past and how that has influenced where they are and possibly healing old wounds so that they can move forward, whereas life coaching is very much about meeting the person in the present moment, creating the vision that they want in the future and guiding them to create that and giving them the tools that they need so that they can manifest the dreams that they truly have. And I forget the first part of your question. What was the first part of your question?
Speaker 2:I'm not exactly sure, except you're going down the right path of life coaching, and what is it to you and how do you differentiate yourself?
Speaker 3:That was it. Yes, thank you so much. So how I differentiate myself? Because I agree with you. There is so much noise in the field and everybody's like wants to be a life coach and thinks they can be a life coach.
Speaker 3:And but what makes me different is I have a huge background in psychology. I, for the past almost two decades, I eat, sleep, breathe, live psychology. I am fascinated by the human mind, the human brain, how it works. I have so many different techniques that I have acquired over the years psychologically to be able to help people create the change that they want in their lives. Also, personally, I have, in my own youth, a history of mental health issues, with depression and anxiety. So I am also extremely passionate about helping women, particularly that are struggling with issues of mental health, to be able to overcome them so that they can achieve their goals. And also, what I'm most excited about most recently is how I am truly stepping into my role as an energy healer as well. So I offer a really unique way of bringing in all of the like traditional, research-based, science-based psychology principles, but also all of the awesome more Eastern techniques of energy healing and Reiki and being able to help people from that aspect as well.
Speaker 2:Tell me about Reiki, Tell me how that works. I mean, I've seen it and I know that if you are in like a relationship with a therapist and then they've been seeing you on that side, then they can't necessarily see you on the Reiki side. So kind of explain that to our listeners. Of what is it?
Speaker 3:Yes, I will explain that, but first I want to just highlight that's why I chose life coaching instead of doing private practice in psychology because I have the freedom and flexibility to pull in my expertise with Reiki and energy healing, whereas if I was a traditional counselor psychologist I would be very much like I have to stay in my lane. I can't be pulling in from that part of it as well. So Reiki, if your listeners are not sure of what it is, so Reiki is essentially universal life force, energy, and so as a Reiki practitioner, I act as a channel where I'm able to access the Reiki energy and I am able to direct it towards my clients, and in doing so, I can sense where there might be energy blockages among the different chakras that they have, because we all have seven main chakras, from our crown down to our root, and there are many more minor chakras throughout our bodies, through our hands and everything but the seven main chakras. If there are energy blockages in any of them, it will manifest in a number of ways. So, for example, I'm just going to use the throat chakra, for example. So if there is an energy blockage in the throat chakra, so physically what that might manifest is like a sore throat or respiratory illnesses or things of that nature, even thyroid issues.
Speaker 3:But more mentally, psychologically, spiritually, what that might manifest is like being unable or having difficulties with communicating your truth, speaking your truth, speaking up when you need to, feeling as though you can't use your voice when you need to. So I'm able to use the knowledge of energy healing and Reiki and infuse it in the life coaching to help people on a much more holistic way. So I'm not just looking at how the brain works and the psychology of things and giving you strategies that way, but I'm also able to use my skills as a Reiki practitioner. But also, what I love doing is empowering my clients to learn how to use energy healing themselves, because we can all do it. It's not mystical, it's not just for the chosen few. We all have the ability within ourselves to do it, and so I love being able to give my clients the skills to be able to know how they can heal themselves.
Speaker 2:Laura, how did you tap into that? Is that an interest that you just had and seen it personally work for yourself and just kind of dug a little deeper? Or what attracted you to the energy work?
Speaker 3:So I believe there's like science, that the universe gives us all the time right, and so you could call it intuition or science.
Speaker 3:So what interested it to me, what drew me to it, is that it just like kept popping up in my field of vision. So what I mean by that is like for a period of time, the topic of Reiki came up so frequently. This was before I knew what it was, before I was interested in it, so like it might come up at work in a conversation, like where a friend would mention that they were doing something. And then all of a sudden I'd like be listening to a podcast and the topic of Reiki would come up. And then I'd be reading a book and somehow, like that would come up. So it's just like, okay, like I very much believe in following the science of the universe, and so like.
Speaker 3:So, so many times, reiki, reiki, reiki just kept coming up. So I'm like, okay, I'm just gonna, I'm gonna take a, a Reiki one class and I'm going to see what it see, see what it's all about. And so I took my first Reiki class and it was life-changing, like literally life-changing. It opened up my eyes to like a whole other level of being, and so then I was hooked.
Speaker 3:After that, I just kept going, I kept going back, I kept going back and learning more and more and got the training all the way up until so now I'm a Reiki master myself, the training all the way up until so now I'm a Reiki master myself, and it's just, it's amazing and I feel like I just it's part of my mission is to spread this to the world, because it's so life-changing on so many levels spiritually, physically, mentally, emotionally that I just want to be able to share my knowledge both my knowledge, but also be able to give it to other people so that they have it within themselves and that they can share it with the people that are in their community and in their surroundings as well.
Speaker 2:Yeah, Do you find that translating somewhat into your parenting? Do you find that translating?
Speaker 3:somewhat into your parenting. Oh, yes, totally Parenting, like every aspect of my life. It's translating into literally every aspect of my life. But with parenting, yes, and I'm able, it's amazing, it's so cool, so like, if one of my boys is dysregulated and we as moms know what that looks like when our kids are dysregulated, they're all like they could be a hot mess, um, but I'm able to hold the space for them, give them the language also that, um, that you know, you, you are needing to release something or you're holding onto something that needs to be let go and and to be, and to be able to help them regulate through using energy and I do use the Reiki terminology Like I will do like scans with them and like they will see, like, where there is tension and we'll do different practices and exercises to help them release the tension and release the blocked energy and then it's just like been a really calming.
Speaker 3:It's been such a calming addition to parenting and it's a tool that I'm thrilled that I'm able to give to my boys at this young age that they're at, because I wish I knew it when I was a kid, because, you know, as we know, we learn. It's so much easier for us to learn new concepts when we're young, when we're children, and it's hard like think of learning a new language anything else. It's harder to learn concepts as we get older. So I am so, so filled with gratitude and joy that I am able to teach my boys this at their as as children, so that they'll be able to like it's just going to be a part of who they are that they know that they can tap into it and use it at any time, and it's just, it's a tool that they can use.
Speaker 2:Yeah, have you seen where they tapped into it and and you weren't really a part of it, you just kind of saw it happen?
Speaker 3:That's a really good question. So my older boy yeah, yes, I've seen that. My younger one. He still definitely needs coaching with it, but I have, you know, seen my older son when he is in a dysregulated state. I have seen him at times like just be able to, like, right now I'm holding my hands over my heart right now and just being able to give. I've seen him like take a pause and give him that love and that space over his heart, space when he's feeling emotional about something. And it's such a beautiful thing to see. I'm just so proud of them and so and so proud that he knows already that he has this gift within him and that he can access it at any time. And is it perfect? Of course not. You know, everything is a work in progress and all humans, at all points in life, have room and space to continue to grow. But I'm just so overjoyed to see that he's able to tap into it already. Yeah, that's great.
Speaker 2:Well, there are so many demands on parents, on moms, and when you are doing the juggle from school to activities, to teaching life skills, there's just so much. How do you balance, how do you, how do you applaud yourself as you're going through those stages, especially with younger, younger kiddos?
Speaker 3:Wonderful question.
Speaker 3:Yeah, there's so much to juggle, so I've gotten better at it recently, especially in delving into my work as a life coach, because I've really spent so much time with teaching the value of stillness and teaching the value of creating space to reflect and to meditate, and so I have made it a part of my schedule really every day to have some quiet time to myself, whether it's before my family wakes up in the morning or after they go to bed at night, or if I, if they're watching a show after school.
Speaker 3:You need to make time for yourself because when you create and it doesn't have to be a long chunk of time If you can create even 15 minutes of stillness where you meditate or you journal or you do something like just really tuning in to yourself and your present state, you are able to. I find that, like those 15 minutes that I give to myself, like it's, it's like I can give back, I'm so recharged and so so much more, like my cup is full so I'm just able to give back to my family and so much more and I'm not as stressed or exhausted or things that I used to be, and it's really been a skill that I've been practicing and been very deliberate about doing, but it is so helpful and really I would encourage anybody listening to do that to prioritize yourself and start small. Start with five, 10, 15 minutes and you'll be surprised at the the rate of return of what you get for your investment of time in yourself.
Speaker 2:Oh wow, I found it interesting. You said it's a skill and it's like well skill we can work on, improve and make time to to work on that. So in your scheduling, are you a block scheduler? Are you a minute by minute? Are you an overall? This is the day I'll get to this here whenever I mean, how do you schedule and how do you keep up with yourself?
Speaker 3:So I like to create a schedule right, just because it's nice when you wake up in the morning to have kind of a roadmap for what you think your day is going to be like. But the universe, you know, always has other plans too. So you have to, you have to be flexible. So, yes, like every day, I do have a schedule and I try to stay on that schedule. But if things come up or if things take longer, if things don't happen, do I freak out about it? No, I don't. I, you know, you have to learn how to bob and weave and just, you know, be flexible and find pockets of time that maybe you didn't think you were going to have and instead of, like, picking up your phone and scrolling through your social media, like, do something productive, like it's amazing how much time that we have in our days that is not really accessed as productively as it can be. So, so, yes, I create a schedule and I don't, I don't freak out if it gets messed up.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that could be a daily freak out, I know, for me, just because just earlier I needed to make a quick phone call, the person that I needed to talk to wasn't available. She's going to call me back. I keep looking at going don't call me now, don't call me now, and it's like that's not within my control, so I just kind of have to let it go and by the end of the day hopefully we can connect and take care of that. But you know we're constantly solving problems. Entrepreneur, an entrepreneur, life can be so incredibly lonely. How have you set up to make sure that you don't feel some of those aches and pains as you are growing your business?
Speaker 3:Thank you for bringing that up. That is incredibly powerful statement. Yes, it can be isolating, because I right now am a solopreneur. I am a business of me, it's me just me.
Speaker 3:So it can be lonely if you don't deliberately make time to connect with other people, and I truly believe in the value and the importance of community. We are social animals, us humans. We are not meant to live in isolation. It is not healthy for us to live in isolation, and so I have been very deliberate about networking, creating friendships, creating connections with other entrepreneurs, and we are so lucky in this generation, in this day and age, that, like you and I, are in different states or like in different parts of the country, but we can talk in real time and have a meaningful conversation.
Speaker 3:It is so easy to be able to connect with other like-minded people by virtue of the internet, and so I am blessed in that I have made a good number of friends that are doing similar entrepreneurial endeavors as me, and so we build each other up, we share our whinge, we share our struggles, we cheer each other on. That's so important. Also, you know, as a life coach, I'm in the business of working with people, so I'm with people all day, you know like. So that's a part of it too is that I very much am filled up by the clients that I'm talking to, by the people that I'm helping by, by the um, the humanity that I'm in contact with, and so it's isolating. If you let it be, don't let it be. So, make the choices. Do the things to prevent yourself from being isolated.
Speaker 2:That is so interesting. The if you let it be so much of what you are saying has this thread of responsibility, of personal responsibility. So you believe that there is some personal responsibility that we each have to be able to create what we want to come out with Would. I be correct in assuming that, yes, you would.
Speaker 3:You know I am a strong believer in the concept of manifestation. So you literally create the life that you have, like you do, like everything in your life the house that you're in, the car that you drive, the friends that you have, the food that you eat, the places that you choose to go. You decide, we all decide what we want and then we take inspired action to make that our reality. If we going back to like, am I isolated? If I don't want to be isolated which I do not want to be isolated you better make sure I'm taking steps to make sure that I'm not putting myself in a place where I'm feeling isolated. And I strongly agree that we all have the responsibility to create the life and we have the power to create the life that we want, all aspects of our life.
Speaker 3:We are not victims. We are not just, like you know, feathers in the wind that you know. It just happens Like we decide what we want and we create it. And it's so magical and so fun and that's the pieces. You have to have fun. If you're not having fun, what's the point? Right, everything that you're doing.
Speaker 2:Yeah Well, a lot of what we're talking about here involves trust. You have to trust yourself, you have to trust the process. So if you were to describe trust and how you establish trust, how would you go about that? What would be your description? How do you establish it with yourself and with others? Let's talk about trust.
Speaker 3:Okay, so I trust myself 100% all the time. I like that, just that's my baseline. I trust myself and if whatever I decide is going to happen is going to happen good, bad, right, wrong. Like I am the maker of my own life, I trust myself Like there's, it's just like there's. There's not even a conversation to me.
Speaker 3:Trust with others, um, trust with others I, I, I, always, always, always. When I'm starting a relationship with somebody else with friendship, connection, colleague, whatever, I give them the benefit of trust immediately, and that's just how I operate. I don't know if that's right or wrong, but that's how I am. I trust you until you give me a reason not to trust you. And then, if you've given me a reason not to trust you, then I make my decisions in accordance with that and that's on me. Again, I'm trusting myself because I, you know, am blessed to have a brain that works, that can make decisions, and so if I have learned through experience that somebody is not trustworthy, then it is on me to react accordingly and to choose what I want to share or not share, or do or not do with this other person. Does that answer the question?
Speaker 2:Yeah, it does. It does so have you had to forgive yourself for being too trusting sometimes and then kind of reset what that might need to look like, look like as you go in the future? Yeah.
Speaker 3:I don't know that.
Speaker 3:I would use the word forgive myself, because I think that we all are operating by doing the best that we can with the information and the resource that we have at any given time, and so if I made an error with trusting somebody prematurely, then that you know I'm not angry at myself for that.
Speaker 3:You know it's information that I'm learning and so so I I not necessarily feeling a need like, oh shoot, I messed up, I, I trusted that person too soon. I'm just, I'm like okay, like I'm just gathering information and and yeah, and because I think that if we spend time beating ourselves up, that is not energy that is well spent at all. Like really for and I and I struggle to think of like anything like like think about, like how, how and when. Would that be a good use of your time? To look back at a decision you made erroneously and beat yourself up over it and wallow in that Like that isn't going to propel you forward, that isn't going to help you improve. It just, to me, is energy, that is could be directed in a more productive way.
Speaker 2:Yeah, wow, people do, they really do go back and they go. If I'd only known I would have done X, y, z, and it's like you know, I think too is as parents.
Speaker 2:I mean, probably the biggest comfort I have is if my kids will have that assumption, that I made the decisions based on everything I knew at the time, because you look at I mean I look at when I was growing up versus today the information available to me was not available to my parents. The comparison you know that we have with our peers today, they didn't have.
Speaker 2:And so you look at that and go, wow, if we all make decisions based on what we know I mean, we make health decisions based on what we know and then when you find out, oh, that really wasn't good for you, you're like, well, at the time I thought it was. I mean, you know, there are definitely some things that are clear cut. But yeah, that idea of taking the information you have, processing it and making a decision and moving on. Where do you go when you have a problem? How do you sort out a problem, whether it's a problem in your work and learning something, of not being able to master something in a relationship I know there's different places for every problem but where do you go when you need some help?
Speaker 3:So I mentioned earlier the importance of community, the importance of relationships and connections, and so I am blessed that I have a circle of people that I am very comfortable going to when I have a problem, because we all have problems, you know, nothing is perfect. And so if you are lucky enough to have friends, family, colleagues, neighbors that you can turn to, depending on what the problem is, and realizing that asking for help is actually a huge sign of strength, Because I think that a lot of people get that wrong and they think that I'm vulnerable or weak if I'm admitting that I need help. No, admitting that I need help, no, Admitting that you need help and asking for it is a sign of self-awareness and strength. So asking for help my husband, Damon, is a wonderful source of support for me as well, so he and I will talk if there are things that come up. And we you know two brains, two or more brains always are good at processing different information because, like you, can just recycle the same thoughts in your head over and over and over, but it's hard to generate new thoughts without having another thinking partner with you.
Speaker 3:So, um, so, utilizing the people that are around you and and talking through problems. Even you know this might sound a little odd to some listeners, but I'll talk to my children too, because I think we discredit the wisdom that they hold. Um. So so, yeah, do I talk to them about my bills and my taxes? No, but, but like if I'm like if I had a disagreement with somebody or something happened in the supermarket, that was odd.
Speaker 3:I'll be like, hey, this is a conversation I had, Like what do you think of this? And sometimes it's wild, like the wisdom that spews from their little mouths. Yes, Like I didn't think of that. Yes, Like I didn't think of that. And then another thing again, because I mentioned stillness earlier a lot of times we down the clatter around you, the noise, because when you do that, sometimes it's just so surprising at the information that comes forth that is really possibly from within you, maybe from universe or whatever source you want to call it. But yeah, there are many ways that you can tackle problems and resources. You don't have to do it by yourself. I know that.
Speaker 2:Well, I mean, you do some guided meditation and thinking and it's funny because we assume that we hear our own thoughts. But if you ever take just a few minutes, it's amazing how many darts off of the path you can can go in in 60 seconds. So true. So do you have a a quick way of like, hey, try this to stay channel focused other than practice.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so your listeners have probably heard this before, but I'm going to bring it up because it's so true. Your breath, your breath, is truly one of the greatest tools that we all have access to at any single point in time to help ground us and bring us back to center. And so there are so many different breathing strategies and breathing techniques that you can do. If you are needing to still yourself to come in, like, there's the box breathing technique, which is a good one. So that is just so, I'll do it. So you breathe for four, hold going down, exhale for four and then hold going up, and you just do it as many times as you need to.
Speaker 3:Your breath will always be able to regulate yourself. It will reduce your heart rate, it will calm your racing thoughts because you are focused so singularly on the act of your breath, the sensation of it coming in your nose and out of your mouth. Focus on that, and if you feel your mind darting off, which it will, don't judge it, don't beat yourself up, just notice that like, okay, my thoughts are going there. I'm choosing to bring it back to my breath. Do that for a minute. A minute, we all have a minute where we can just, you know, stop and focus on our breath and then notice the physiological changes that are going to happen in your body and in your racing thoughts. You're going to notice a shift.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that is so interesting. And when you're talking about breathing, you know, in exercise breathing is important. You, you can do more of your routine. If you're breathing properly, you can achieve more reps, you can. You know, pace it. And, and it's funny, I I'm in this swimming class and we're doing these. He calls them soldier boys and then something else. I'm not sure what the other one was, but you go down to the deep end and you are straight leg, straight arm and you're just, you know, doing a soldier walk. But the secret is not that, the secret is breathing.
Speaker 2:And the secret is, like you know, taking the breath in, taking the breath out, and my first reaction was I'm focused on not drowning, so I'm going to be like using my arms and my legs, and but then I thought, all right, all right, I'll, I'll try this. And and it was amazing, because you're so, I mean, the three minutes flies. Well, not really, but the three minutes goes a little quicker when you have that focus on that breathing of like you know it's going to go in, it's going to go out, it's going to go in, it's going to go out, and I guess that with that focus I didn't bob down under, or you know.
Speaker 2:So it's really important and kind of cool when you come across these little nuances that people say like that, and then you apply it and, lo and behold, it works. So do you chart your successes to where you're like, see that worked. So now I can propel myself a little further now I can propel myself a little further.
Speaker 3:Do I chart my successes Not enough? Yeah, I probably should. I probably should do more. So so I'm I. In recent time I've really been delving into journaling and so sometimes my successes will come out through my journaling. So me thinking through different things, but but I am not deliberate about charting. My successes will come out through my journaling. So me thinking through different things, but but I am not deliberate about charting my successes. And, and you know what? I'm glad you asked that question because celebrating your successes is a really important part of whatever process, whatever process you're in or whatever you're you're you're trying to do, whatever process you're in or whatever you're trying to do. It is so important for you to acknowledge the successes and we all have, you know, micro and macro successes, but it's important to celebrate all of them. Do you have?
Speaker 2:your successes Not enough. And I've started to do that because, um, as a matter of fact, I was challenged to go back to my very first career success, like all the way back when I was probably in college doing internships, and write down what I considered to be a success in each one of my career changes and you know, I hadn't thought about those a lot in years, and so it became very interesting to me. Those successes were my stepping stones and because I've stepped on them and moved on, I really hadn't thought about it, but yeah, I think it's something that probably would be beneficial to increase. Agreed, yeah, what do you think you'll always need help with? I mean, you've already said you're not an island, so are there things that you feel like that are always going to be, just where you turn to someone?
Speaker 3:I think that you know, my mind just went to like my, my entrepreneurial journey right now, and I think that that's just one example. Like, we all need help at every stage of our lives for different things and, and you know, for me, right now, my focus is like learning how to grow a business, because I've never done it before and so I've been in the helping profession for almost two decades but and so I'm really good at that but I know nothing, or I knew nothing, about what it takes to start and grow a business, and so that has been incredibly humbling takes to start and grow a business, and so that has been incredibly humbling. How much you don't know. You don't know what you don't know, and I love that saying, cause it's so true, I had no idea what I didn't know, but I do like, and I still don't know what I don't know, but I'm learning and, and just so, whatever you're trying to do in life, whether it's starting a business, whether it's a new hobby, whether you know, whatever it is, I think, being humble enough to ask for help and to receive help, um, and that you know that you don't have to do anything on your own.
Speaker 3:Uh, so I, I um, I'm very much a believer in being a lifelong student. Like I never want to stop learning. I always want to grow my skill sets and learn new things because, like there's infinite potential in all of us. So, but we can't learn. You can learn, you can learn from reading books and watching, you know, youtubes and webinars and things like that. But there there's something about working with actual people and communicating with actual people, where you're able to propel your knowledge so much faster and more efficiently and it's just so much more expansive. So I think, just connecting with others, leaning into their areas of expertise and getting whatever nuggets of knowledge you can get.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I love that and it requires so much action. You can't be stagnant in a relationship and just get poured into. It's just kind of a give and take. What's your definition of strong? I know you've come across strong women strong I mean through the, the academic field. You I'm sure you had mentors and and people that you looked at that were pretty strong within the system, and strong parents that you've worked with or strong kids. But but what would your definition of strong be?
Speaker 3:Yeah, my definition of strong, okay, so knowing what is right and being unwavering and supporting that and standing by that. So I think in education, in my, in my career in the public education setting, knowing your true north at all times and like going in that aspect of my life your priority as an educator needs to be the wellbeing of the children that you are serving. Period, that's it. It's not about you know getting the awards or you know um getting it, it's you need to always have the kid's best interest at heart and if you see something happening that is not in the kid's best interest, then you are brave enough and strong enough to speak up and to do something about it.
Speaker 3:It is so easy to be silent and to do nothing and to just watch things go by, because that's easier. Being strong is taking a stance and being unapologetic with speaking up and showing up for what you know to be right, and we all have this within us. We all know what is right and wrong, and I believe that to my core, I truly do. If something is happening that is wrong, at whatever level, you feel it in your body, you know it, and to be able to do or say something about it Like that is strength. That, to me, is strength, and for the good of other people.
Speaker 2:Wow. So a follow-up question on that and it's probably going to go down the same avenue is if you could shout about something really loudly this is your platform. What would you say?
Speaker 3:That every single human has infinite potential. Every single human has infinite potential. Every child, every adult, every. I don't care what age, what socioeconomic status you are, what your quote unquote disabilities or limitations are. Every single human has infinite potential. And once you realize that, you are going to be thrilled with the magic that you're able to create in your life. But it really truly starts with believing this and knowing it to be true in yourself. And when you have that belief in yourself, it's really easy to share that with other people.
Speaker 3:So in my career as a school psychologist, I very much saw this in every single child I worked with. Every single child had infinite potential to be and do whoever they wanted to be. And now in my life coaching practice, because I'm so passionate about helping women in later, different stages of their lives, because I feel like women lose sight of the greatness that they hold within themselves and they live so small in so many ways, whether it's the career or being in a relationship that's not serving them or not pursuing the dream that they thought like oh, it's too late for me, no freaking way you could do whatever you want to do, like. The sky is literally the limit, and it's not just for the select few. It is all of our right, all of our purpose to truly decide what we want our lives to be and to create it.
Speaker 2:It's so interesting that you say that I've had the privilege. In this swim class that I go to, there's a lady who's in her 80s and she's going to be on the podcast here with me, but I mean, she is kicking my butt in there every day and we were talking the other day and she's like I've got probably 20 more years, I've got so much to do and I need to be physically and mentally fit to do it. And I'm like, wow, she's great, isn't that inspiring? Right, it is.
Speaker 2:But then here was the absolute astonishing part to me I realized that I was 20 years the senior of two ladies behind me, and and you know they were talking about being young moms, and and it was like, oh, wow, she's 20 years older than me, I'm 20 years older than them. And then it just goes on and on, and so all of a sudden you know it's like not only do you have potential, but those that are watching you have potential and they're getting some of their inspiration or drive off of you. So true, oh, it was just this moment of like responsibility.
Speaker 3:It is fully into your power and what you are able to do. Not only are you making a fabulous life for yourself, but, as you just said, you are inspiring a younger generation of people to show them how to do it and just show them what's possible. Like you, like just by essence of being yourself, like fully, like stepping into all of your greatness, you cannot help but have a ripple effect on the people that are witnessing you. True true.
Speaker 2:Well now, at the same time, in your life coaching and in your career with the students, your heart can get completely wrapped up in this, and yet the power and the control to do or change or implement may not be all yours. How do you deal with that? Are you a heart thinker, head thinker? How do you handle it?
Speaker 3:You know, in the helping professions there's something very real called compassion fatigue. Real called compassion fatigue, um, because we pour so much of ourselves into um, doing the heart work of helping others and helping them and getting in the weeds with them, and and um, so it's very, it's an important skill, one to have and desire that you know that I have. And people in the helping profession have to be able to meet individuals, children, adults, I don't care to be able to meet people where they are in their journey, emotionally, emotionally, holding space for them, but also know that you are a lighthouse. You need to protect your energy and realize what is theirs and what is yours.
Speaker 3:And that is how I have been able to protect myself, because and this is why so many people leave the profession because of the compassion fatigue, because it is, if you are not able to differentiate your energy from the energy of those that you are serving, you are going to burn out.
Speaker 3:It is not going to be healthy for you, it is not going to be healthy for your family, your loved ones. You must, must, must, must protect your own energy and it is not selfish or being, you know, not a great professional to protect your energy. In protecting your energy, you are able to show up every day for the people that you are serving and be with them and sit with them and guide them and help them through their struggles, while also maintaining your own strength, your own groundedness, your own centeredness. Because, as we were saying, with you inspiring others like you, but by me showing up and being a fully grounded, centered person, my energy is going to influence theirs and help them co-regulate with me to be more grounded and centered. And and yeah, I mean that I'm not sure if that answered your question the way, the way it was intended, but that was what came to mind for me.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely so. You made reference to lighthouse. Why? Why lighthouse, you're to be a lighthouse, so tell me how that analogy plays out.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so when I think of a lighthouse, I think like, think you know, envision a lighthouse. So tell me how that analogy plays out. Yeah, so when I think of a lighthouse, I think like, think you know, envision a lighthouse in your minds. And it is just this strong, um, unwavering tower that provides a light, provides guidance, shows the way, um, but I'm not moving. Like I am, I am strong and I am firm and I am grounded. But I am going to show you, I'm going to guide you, I'm going to help you so that you can take the steps and that you can do the things that are required to create healing, to create change, whatever it is that you're trying to do.
Speaker 3:A lighthouse very much is is, it's immobile. You know you're standing there, you are the source, the unmovable. You are like the true North. When you get lost, you look back to the lighthouse to see like, where am I? So, so that's like kind of what I picture it Like. I'm just like, okay, like you, feeling lost, I'm here, I am here for you, I am not going anywhere and I'm going to guide you and help you. But but you know what, like I, um, I can't do the journey for you Like you, you've got to do it.
Speaker 2:Sometimes, when people start a business, and especially one that is a service business it's not a measurable product. Um, they find themselves sometimes going into what they feel like is imposter syndrome, like who am I? Who am I to be the lighthouse? Who am I to show the way? Who am I? Do you ever have mornings you wake up and you, you have that feeling you.
Speaker 3:You know what? Yes, and I think that's totally normal, and I actually look at imposter syndrome as a good thing, and I'll tell you why, and I say this to my clients as well Imposter syndrome if you're experiencing imposter syndrome, that means you are stretching yourself and growing as a professional, as a friend, as a, as a coworker, whatever it is. If you are experiencing imposter syndrome, that means that you are expanding and you're growing, and it is a normal reaction to trying something that is maybe new or maybe maybe unfamiliar or uncharted, and I think that's just a part of the process. To be honest. I like that's just a part of the process, to be honest.
Speaker 2:I like that. I like that because people talk about it and go, yeah, I'm not worthy, yeah, you're right, you're right. And it's like it kind of falls in that same category as failure. If you step into it and you stay there, then yeah, but if you go through it, then you're going to come out having grown, having learned, having something else that makes you a little more comfortable going down the road. What's the scariest thing you've ever done? And it might be just this.
Speaker 3:The scariest thing I've ever done. I've done a lot of scary things. I'm not sure. We want to talk personally, professionally, whatever. What are you thinking?
Speaker 2:Wherever your mind takes you.
Speaker 3:Okay, well, I think I'll just stay on topic here. Starting a business is freaking scary, especially if you had a really stable career and a family. While you have a stable career, to make a decision that you want something different and more and to truly step into the unknown. And what makes it so scary for me, and I think for a lot of entrepreneurs in my particular status as being a wife and mom of kids at this young age, is that it's not a risk. That is just me I have a family to take care of, I have mouths to feed, I'm saving for their college education, and so I'm just in placing this trust that I know in my soul that this is the right path for me, and I do know that. But still it is scary to be walking away from, like so much of the known security of a life and career and identity that I've cultivated for myself for so many years.
Speaker 2:Well, you touched on something there the identity, and you started out with that of who you were and now who you are. So, as we change our identity, there's so many seasons to life. Have you found that that? That your identity changes. You know, from the from as a mom, from the toddler to the, the I don't know what they are in fourth grade, but yeah, to the grammar school kids middle school kids.
Speaker 2:Yeah. And then you know to the adults I mean, my father walked into the room when my son was born and he goes well, you've had the last peaceful night's sleep you will ever have. And I was like, oh yeah, but you know, we'll get the feeding under control and everything and then we'll go back to sleeping. I had no idea what he was talking about and now I know my son is in his thirties, I still am, am awake, or whatever. He sent a text yesterday, said he was going surfing, never came back and said, hey, success in our family chat. We came back in and said, hey, are you still alive? And he goes yeah, I only almost died once. And so it's like, you know, there's just all these things. You don't know what, what your kids are doing as young adults, and I mean we're still pretty connected and, um, out of choice, you know of being involved, but there's just this your heart is always not sure what's going to happen.
Speaker 3:So true, yeah, yeah, and I totally understand what you're saying. And you know, I think back to like when I was a teenager and I'd go out with friends and my mom would stay up until I got home, and I didn't understand it at the time. I'm like, mom just go to bed, like I know, like she goes to bed at nine o'clock and if I came home at 11, she's staying up. I'm like, why are you staying up? I'm coming home, I get it now. I get it Like you, you. You, a piece of your heart is living outside of your body. And like you, just you need, you're always thinking of them, and it doesn't matter if they're a baby or an adult, like you're. You never stopped being their mom, and so I understand that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it definitely, definitely changes as as they go along and you know, you still have those incredibly proud moments because you've given them the tools, like the tools we were talking about earlier, and when you see them, use them and it's like Ooh, yeah, yeah, Um, what? What do you think will always make you smile?
Speaker 3:My kids. I just I, you know, I, I'm just so. They, they fill me with so much joy, Like that's an easy thing. They, I just thought of them and I smile. You know, I just have to like close my eyes and call to call to my mind an image of either of their faces and, um, I'm just so incredibly joyful and so so thankful to be their mom that that I, you know, out of all the moms on the planet that I'm the lucky one that got them, and so so, yeah, Laura.
Speaker 2:What would you tell younger Laura? That that's coming, that you're in for warnings, encouragement?
Speaker 3:What would you tell that younger Laura? I would tell her you've got a lot of crap coming your way, but you're going to get through it. And it's going to feel like you're not going to get through it a lot of the times and you're going to feel like you're broken, but you have so much more strength within you that you have no idea and just just you wait. There's so much good to come and and you are stronger than you have ever realized.
Speaker 2:Well, when you say that just through our whole interview I never felt anything, any boulders that have been in your way, it just doesn't come across that way. So do you have boulders that you come up against?
Speaker 3:Massive boulders, massive boulders. I've had so much heartache in my life, yes, so much my, you know. Just to name a couple, my mom died at a very young age and she had ovarian cancer. She was 46 when she was diagnosed and she died when she was 48. And I was 23 when she died and she was my best friend. So there, that was a big thing. And then the other huge boulder was there was a middle son that I had, that that I lost. So I was meant to have three. I am left with two. So you know, losing a child, there is no pain, there is no pain like it that I've ever experienced, anyways, on this planet.
Speaker 2:I can't. Imagine.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I wouldn't wish it on anybody. I wouldn't wish it on anybody.
Speaker 2:And yet you kind of dig deep and here you are life coaching.
Speaker 3:Yeah, because I think that these experiences, we can choose to look at them and feel like I am a victim. Woe is me, I am broken. Or the way I am looking at them now and it didn't happen immediately is that it has given me different perspectives on life that are literally impossible for me to have were it not for these experiences that I've had in my life. And it has empowered me to be able to be that lighthouse for people, because I know what it's like and I know that you can get through it, and I just want to be able to shine that light for other people.
Speaker 2:Yeah, wow. Well, you definitely have some strengths and some gifts, and those are pretty powerful. Laura, we've talked about so many things. Is there anything that we did not touch on that you want to make sure that we do?
Speaker 3:Um, no, I mean, I I'm just really grateful for this opportunity to speak with you and I want you to know specifically, I really enjoyed this conversation and the questions that you've asked have given me like I've had to really like sit and pause and think before I respond. They're like really thought provoking questions, and so I'm just want to share with you. Thank you, I'm I'm I'm very grateful for this conversation that we've had. Thank, you.
Speaker 2:I absolutely a little. I can't talk. I absolutely love talking to women and um and diving into their stories, because we can get so much from one another. We can build each other up, we can tear each other down and um, the ladder is not productive, and so I really do enjoy it. Laura, how do people get in touch with you? How do they follow you? How do they connect with you if they want to use your services?
Speaker 3:So you can find me on my website, which is lauraflowersllccom. I am offering free discovery calls for anybody that's interested in working with me and learning about what that would look like, and it's absolutely zero pressure. I just enjoy the opportunity to connect, as you, with other women and hear their stories and see if we might be a good match for working with one another. Hear their stories and see if we might be a good match for working with one another. You can also find me on social media. If you're on Instagram, I'm at laurajane23, or you can find me on LinkedIn or YouTube or Facebook just my name, Laura Flowers.
Speaker 2:There you go. Well, this has been great. I have one more question. If you have a superpower for 24 hours, you can use it any way you want to personally or professionally, but you have it for 24 hours. What superpower would you choose? How would you use it? And I really love to know why would it be your choice?
Speaker 3:That's an interesting question. Oh my God, I think about this. I had a superpower for 24 hours. Hmm, you know what? I think I would choose teleporting because then I could see people physically, in person, that are in different parts of the country, in the world. Um, and I just it would provide me a chance to be in community with the people that I care about in physical space, because, you know, being virtual is wonderful, but I just I wish I could be. I wish I could be with, you know, the people that I care about, and be in their space bubble. So that's, I think I would do that. I think teleporting would be really fun too. It would just be kind of a cool thing to do.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I do too. Well, thank you, laura, it's been a pleasure.
Speaker 3:Same here. Thank you so much for having me on your show.
Speaker 1:Thanks. I got my pockets full of dreams and they're busting at the seams, going boom, boom, boom to my own song.
Speaker 4:Gotta stomp to my own drum. Stomp to my own drum. Stomp to my own song, stomp hey. Ooh, ooh, ooh. Gotta stomp to my own drum. Stomp to my own song, stomp hey.
Speaker 1:Ooh, ooh, ooh. There's a great big world that I wanna see and a whole lot of things that I want to be. All I gotta do is count one, two, three to my own drum. Whatever you do, it ain't nothing on me, because I'm doing my thing and I hold the key to all my wants and all my dreams.
Speaker 2:Find Stat Keys Podcast on Spotify, soundcloud and iTunes or anywhere you get your favorite podcast listen. You'll laugh out loud, you'll cry a little, you'll find yourself encouraged. Join us for casual conversation that leads itself, based on where we take it, from family to philosophy, to work to meal prep, to beautifully surviving life. And hey, if I could ask a big favor of you, go to itunes and give us a five rating. The more people who rate us, the more we get this podcast out there. Thanks, I appreciate it. Bye, thank you.