Stacked Keys Podcast
The idea to talk to women who are out there living and making a difference is where the Stacked Keys Podcast was born. There are women who make a difference, but never make a wave while paddling through life. Immediately I can think of a dozen or more who impacted me, but I want more. I want to talk to those I don't know and I want to share with an audience that might need the inspiration to find their own beat. This podcast is to feature women who are impressive in the work world-- or in raising a family -- or who have hobbies that can make us all be encouraged. Want to hear what makes these women passionate and get up in the morning or what they wish they had known earlier in life? Grab your keys and STOMP to your own drum.
Stacked Keys Podcast
Episode 246 -- Vanessa Mulligan -- Slow Down To Feel Rich: Connection Over Perfection
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What if richness isn’t a bigger house but a fuller table? We sit with pediatric nurse, homeschool mom, and Salted Oak founder Vanessa Mulligan to explore how faith, family, and craft weave into a life centered on connection. Vanessa opens up about choosing a homeschool hybrid that gives her girls community while preserving slow mornings at home, and why moving from bedside nursing to an inpatient education role restored her energy without losing purpose. The conversation gets real about resistant readers, social media pressure, and the loud inner critic that tells moms to master everything. Vanessa’s antidote is disarmingly practical: name your season, choose dinner together, and let the wrong plates drop.
We trace the origin of Salted Oak from a love of raw wood and old-world textures to a small business that invites people to pause around beautiful, useful pieces. Vanessa shares how she outsourced board-making to protect family time and elevate craftsmanship, and how something as simple as a brick of cheese and grapes can turn a Tuesday into a memory. We also talk about guiding kids who aren’t our copies, building a village through church and homeschool friends, and using late dinners to spark the unhurried conversations that shape character.
If you’re craving less rush and more meaning, this one is a warm nudge to slow down. Learn how to order engraved boards, get help styling a table, and create rituals that fit real life. Subscribe for more stories like this, share with a friend who needs encouragement, and leave a quick review to help others find the show.
Music "STOMP" used by permission of artist Donica Knight Holdman and Jim Huff
Meet Vanessa Mulligan
SPEAKER_02Welcome to Stacked Keys Podcast. I'm your host, Amy Stackhouse. This is a podcast to feature women who are impressive in the art world or in raising a family or who have hobbies that make us all feel encouraged. Want to hear what makes these women passionate to get up in the morning, or what maybe they wish they'd known a little bit earlier in their lives? Grab your food and stop. Well, I am super excited. We have a great time this morning, a fantastic guest. I cannot wait to dive into her talent and find out what inspires and just give you all the goods on Vanessa Mulligan. Welcome, Vanessa. Welcome to the show today.
SPEAKER_00Thank you so much. I'm just really honored to be here. Thank you so much for allowing me to be a part of today.
SPEAKER_02Oh, I'm I'm really excited and I cannot wait to find out so much about you. So, right out of the gate, Vanessa, tell the audience who you are, both personally and professionally.
Homeschool Purpose And Hybrid Support
SPEAKER_01Sure. Um, I'm Vanessa Mulligan. I work as a pediatric nurse. Um, and that is kind of what pays the bills. Uh, we homeschool our two girls, they attend a local homeschool hybrid. Um, we just really love that model. So that's a lot of my time goes to really them in this season. Um, and then I'm an owner of a small business called Salted Oak that really centers around connection. Um, really the heart behind that business is uh connecting people and really inspiring a slowdown, uh specifically around the table. Um, so we really focus on tablescapes and kind of these handmade charcuterie boards and beautiful food and just times of connection. Oh, wow. Well, you're not busy at all. Well, you know, I mean you just throw that in the mix.
SPEAKER_02Wow. That that you're in so many different seasons at the same time. Oh, yeah. Yeah. What's priority at the moment?
SPEAKER_01Um, I would say, you know, I became a mom a little later in life. Um, my first daughter was born, I was 34, and my second one was I was 37. And so I feel like that has really taken, you know, that is my priority. It's I think that as you get older, you realize how fast it goes. And so I really have felt that kind of treasured time with them. So I would say that, you know, my family, my husband and the girls are really, I just try to soak up that that time with them, which was really the driver of the homeschooling, was just trying to really maximize this season with them. Um secondary to that, I had a lot of creative energy. Um, and also really wanted to kind of take them along in that, and kind of sharing those passions of food and hosting kind of with them. And so um that's kind of where Salted Oak came about, also.
SPEAKER_02Well, that's really neat. Um now in today's society, there's a mix of homeschool thought. Um so you're not exactly blazing the trail, but yet you are. Um, and then when COVID came through, um homeschool became, oh, we're all homeschooling. And it's like, I mean, I cringed when I heard that because it's like, no, that is so not what true homeschooling is. And um, and a lot of times it takes everything out of you to do. Um, you may not be exactly strong in one area, but you're strong in another. So going down that homeschool path, have you felt like you've had to kind of blaze your own trail a little? Or do you have, you know, you you mentioned being a part of a hybrid. Um, so do you have that support?
Wins, Struggles, And Realistic Expectations
SPEAKER_01Um great question. Um, the two things, we have a really strong church community and a village of women there that homeschool. And so that has been a real like inspiration and support to my heart personally of kind of the the why, like, why am I doing this? So on those like harder days when you go, why am I doing this? Um, you've got those voices of the women that inspire you, that village. Um, and then yes, we are a part of a hybrid, which, you know, they provide the curriculum, um, which is super helpful. It's a fantastic curriculum. And then it's also a community of support. So that has been um, you know, really like a it's a larger hybrid of, you know, K through 12. And so it has given, especially as our girls are getting a little older, um, really kind of a school community of sports and clubs and social things happening and just more maybe what feels like that traditional uh private school experience a little bit, um, while coupling with getting a lot of time with them. So they go to that hybrid two days a week. That is when I'm able to work as a nurse and pay the bills. And then um the other three days during the school week, they're home with me. And so I I love that.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, that's a great blend. And you know, I I remember having advice given to me early on, where someone said, you know, do you do your kids always say, Oh, when you ask them to go make their bed, oh mommy, I'd love to clean my room? They're not gonna do that with school either. They're gonna do the same thing of uh some days. And when you take that attitude of wait, this is just like those other tasks in life that we're kind of getting them prepared for, you're not expecting that enthusiasm every single day.
SPEAKER_01Oh, it's so true. It's so true. And you do sometimes too. I think you know, you look at social media or you look at sometimes the highlight reels that we're faced with, and it will just can feel like, oh my gosh, is everybody just zippity-doo-dying their way through their magical moments, you know? And you just go, Well, wait a minute. Um, I know that's not the whole, the whole story and the whole picture for any of us. And so, you know, you definitely have those wins that you try to capture and treasure. And then the days where you're like, how's this going? Um, that maybe feel like a little less victorious.
SPEAKER_02So we roll with those two. Yeah, definitely. What's your favorite subject to be involved with your girls on?
Reading Joy And Different Kids’ Paths
SPEAKER_01I love um the reading. I mean, I just they I I honestly um both my girls were kind of resistant readers. And so um, it's been really cool to see my older daughter make this kind of shift kind of later in like fifth grade, probably. Um, she had a uh actually part of the hybrid, a teacher that was a really passionate reader. And I think it really inspired. So it's been neat to see her um the last couple of years, she's entering seventh grade, just become an avid reader. Um, and just soak up because I loved reading. And so I love seeing them just love a good story and kind of get lost in a great story. And so we're still, you know, prayers for the little one. She's not yet there with her passion in that area, but um, but you just see this, you see them kind of catch that, like, man, it's just so empowering. So that's my favorite thing to kind of be able to, you know, sit with a great book and read with them and see them both still enjoy that is awesome.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Oh, I know I can relate to that. And you have when you have more than one child, you're gonna have differences, and that is um part of your journey of being able to find those passions and differences that they have and really accentuate on them and give them the opportunities. So um, but you've got both a science background and a creative background. I didn't know both sides of that brain could develop, so I'm really impressed. Um, but how do you divide yourself pediatric nurse and all of the drains that that can be? I mean, you're having to put your passion and life and concern in one area. How do you have enough?
SPEAKER_01Oh, that's a great question. Yeah, when there's days you feel like, oh, how am I doing? Um I feel like my faith is a really big piece of just my bandwidth, of just really seeing how God is working um in all of it. And so on those days when you just feel like you're kind of emptied or um, you know, I'm hitting my own limits, I think seeing that God is picking up the slack and kind of like that he's the one kind of carrying it all anyway, I think allows me to kind of lay it down and just enjoy what it is in kind of those imperfect days. Um in a practical way of so I work now full time in education at the children's hospital. And so that has, you know, in leaving bedside nursing, um, I was able to still, you know, be inpatient. So I work in the inpatient hospital and patient facing, but physically it was, I definitely found it less draining. And so it's very compartmentalized, which has really been just a blessing where I kind of go, I'm able to connect with people and support them there. But then when I leave it, I leave it and it stays home or it stays at the hospital and I go home. And so that's been a real blessing because I feel like it's been almost more of a tool in this season to kind of enjoy it and pay the bills with it. But then really home is my passion. And so I think that's, you know, it's allowed me to kind of keep my foot in it, but but leave it, leave it at the office when it's time to come home.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Well, and then education that kind of goes parallel with the homeschool, and you're thinking of educating. And then so that's that's really I guess that you're exactly right. God provides and you take the turns when they come. Have you have you ever had any of those moments where you've gone, I should have turned left and I turned right?
Nursing, Faith, And Bandwidth
SPEAKER_01You know what? Oh, sure. You know, where I'm like, oh, that was, you know, that didn't go as planned, or you know, and there's even those moments in life where you're like, you know, I've had such a passion for home and creating. And, you know, I just sometimes I'm like, wow, should I have gone a different route versus the science route? You know, when you kind of see these passions for design or, you know, hosting and different, but then you see how God just gave you a tool. Um, you know, that nursing is and what what I love about nursing is the connecting. Um, it's the people that I get to interact with every day and support and listen to and help and empower. And so it's really the same passions that just show up in a different way. Um, and so I've been so grateful for that career and just how it's empowered my family. Um, but then to be able to use those same passions and you know, pour them into something like Salted Oak. Um, it's really the same drivers of connection and people that that kind of are the foundation of what you love about it. So um it's funny how it's different, but then it all kind of goes together um in the way it like presents itself.
SPEAKER_02So well, let's talk about salted oak. Um, how did it come about? Talk to me about the name. Uh salted oak is uh I I just know there's some strength in that that uh company name just to start with.
SPEAKER_01So yeah. Absolutely. I so I grew up in Colorado, so I love the outdoors, I love the mountains. Um, and I just fell in love aesthetically with kind of raw wood and just the way that that just how beautiful that could be. Um even just seeing how God's such a creator. I mean, you just can look at like a raw piece of wood and you know, you oil it up and you're just like, oh my gosh, it's like artistry on like it's just a piece of wood. Um, but you just see it's just so beautiful. So I really fell in love with that aesthetic of kind of this idea of bringing the outside in, um, you know, the flowers, you know, kind of farm to table food, and just kind of this idea of um I loved kind of European styling, you know, when you just see this really kind of old world um aesthetic that I just thought was so beautiful and kind of would inspire me to slow down. Um, so that creative energy of just loving that kind of raw wood, loving the kitchen, loving um creating a table that was beautiful, um, and really desiring connection in my own family and you know, among family and friends. And so salted oak, the idea of it was this idea of, you know, wood, oak, um, and salted being kind of the seasoning, you know, the the extra that you add to, you know, make it make it especially special, um, or feel kind of um, yeah, salted, if you will. And so I know that there's a lot of, you know, kind of parallels with that name. Um, but that's kind of where it came from, this idea of taking wood and really flavoring it and making it something extra special.
SPEAKER_02Well, now you are involved in putting together the chakuterie boards and the, but do you also create the board?
From Bedside To Education Role
SPEAKER_01You know, I did initially. Initially, I was um, I would source the wood and then I would create the board. Um, and then, you know, over the years, because of just with homeschooling and kind of, you know, the where my time was, I felt like my time just became super precious. Um, and again, feeling like I was in this really kind of special season with my kids. Um, it's it's interesting. As my kids have gotten older, I have almost felt like they've needed me a little bit more, um, which surprised me as a mom. I felt like growing up, my mentality was always thinking, oh, you know, we hit kindergarten and you know, you kind of start to be less needed or some like school age. But I found that especially as we, you know, my oldest has entered middle school, and I just felt like, man, I they really um the the bandwidth and the intentionality of the conversations and the you know connection with them just was just so important and my time was so precious. So I now source that out. So I have um woodworkers um and places that I will get those handmade boards. Um and that's been really beautiful from a time standpoint. And then honestly, they're so talented. So I'm like, wow, this is better than what I could, you know, this is really beautiful. Um, so that's been really fun too, is to kind of be able to find those unique handmade pieces um that really reflect that vision.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Well, and that is interesting that you say that because you're able to let go of some things which open up more. And and that's kind of a sometimes we don't think of that as a balance, but it really is if you let go and open up. Um, I want to keep going on that same line of thought, but I want to jump just a second. You were talking about the conversations that you are are able to have. Is there a particular conversation with your girls that that you have found to be incredibly difficult?
Why Salted Oak Exists
SPEAKER_01Oh, sure. Um, it's funny, you know, when you have kids, they I don't know what I when I dreamed of motherhood, I just kind of imagined like mini-mies, you know, like they're gonna be just like me and they're gonna love the things that I love and they're just gonna lean into my instruction. And, you know, it's been as you have your kids and you go, oh wow, you're so different than me, or you know, what like lights you up and gets you excited. Um, and so I think sometimes there's been that grieving in those conversations because you realize, wow, you are just not quite maybe into you know what I'm into in different ways. Um, I'm like, come on out to the garden, and they're like, no, thanks, you know, like and you're like, oh, come on, you know, it's so fun. Um, but then what's really cool is as you have those conversations and you draw them out and you start to lean into who they are, that's amazing because you go, wow, look, look at these talents and interests that you have that I never had. Um, and you just start to admire and recognize what they are and how it's beautiful that they're different from me and really celebrating that in them and helping them to celebrate that. Um look how God has made you. It's amazing. So I feel like sometimes those initial like discoveries have been you kind of grieve it a little bit where you go, oh, I thought we would like enjoy this aspect of me together. Um, but then you know, it's it's been, you know, even when I started Salted Oak initially, one of my daughters was like, oh, mom, it's a board. Like I just do not see the, you know, oh, like what just kind of felt like, you know, and then you know, you'd put something together and she's like, Well, I mean, that is that is pretty. Or, you know, I'd be oiling something up and she's like, Wow, that, you know, I do like that one. And then it's funny, she's been my one to really become a creative. I mean, she just loves art, loves making things beautiful, loves being in the kitchen. And so it's funny how as as she's getting older, you start to see her, oh, you're a little more like me than I thought, you know. So, but it just looks a little different.
SPEAKER_02Um, I know what you're saying. Um, I I guess this past holiday season, my son has um, he does a lot of living in Mexico and he's travels a lot. And this last Thanksgiving, he was asking me for recipes because in the group he was in, he was like, Okay, I need to make those cinnamon rolls, tell me how. Um, I need to make uh how do you do a pecan pie? Well, I don't know, I haven't done that in years. Um, but you know, then we had these traditions, and then that you realize that your recipes you've tweaked and you haven't written that down. And yet he's wanting to recreate this. And so all of a sudden, something I've been doing since he was a toddler in his 30s, he's like, Hey, I need that. And uh and it is one of those feelings of like you're like, Oh yes, you noticed. Wow, that's so special. Oh my gosh, that's amazing. It was really it was funny actually, because you're like, wait, what? And and of course, you know, he's asking when you're in the middle of something else and you're like, Oh, I've got to stop this and and focus on getting that for him. So um, but there's a lot of hard things these days. I mean, you've got social media to deal with that I did not. And then you've got, we've always had peer pressure, we've always had bullies, we've always had some of these, but it is like on a ramped up scale now. So have you found those issues to be a bit difficult? Or do you have a peer group that kind of helps you in the monitoring and the the parenting as a tribe? I guess.
Wood, Aesthetic, And Outsourcing Boards
SPEAKER_01Yeah, great question. Um there, yeah, our village is really key. We, you know, from the get-go, I really wanted our church family to be that core village. And so that was something that, you know, as a family, my husband and I were both really, really intentional about as far as um special experiences or like when you start thinking about okay, where are we going to make our family memories? Um, let's really pour into this community. Um, these are our people. And so it's been neat to see the girls kind of come into that and really, really feel like church is home. Um, and so that was like our our core. And then secondary to that, our homeschool community. Um, what's nice about the hybrid model is they are, you know, they're with me five days a week. Um, and then they're there two days a week. So in that, you feel like those things come at you and you want them to come at you in some degree because they've got to maneuver that stuff. So, you know, if you run into that, you know, maybe somebody that said something unkind, or, you know, somebody hurt your feelings, or somebody has curiosity and something that you're like, I don't love that. Let's talk about it. Um, you want some of those things to come their way because that's life. Um, but I I do feel like that that homeschool model, it kind of has come at us a little slower. So you feel like you're able to kind of because instead of getting like, you know, land blasted, you feel like it kind of comes at you at a pace that you can tackle it with some great conversations. Um key for us too has been like family dinners, um, which is really hard as they get a little older because you start adding the sports and the, you know, and you're like, oh my gosh. Um, and you know, we were always like, okay, you're gonna do one activity at a time. Well, then when they come at you and you're like, wow, but they're so passionate about these three things, and you just want them to be able to lean into all the things that they're enjoying. So you really kind of wrestle with not filling up their schedule too much. Um recently, and this is you know, pretty recent, we kind of pushed our dinner time back, um, which, you know, my husband would do remote days on certain days, and then all that ended. So he's like back at the office every day. Um, so we we pushed dinner. We actually been eating more like 7 or 7:30. But something I've really loved about that that surprised me is it's later than I would wish, but it's kind of our end of the day. So, you know, practices are over, dad's home, and we don't have anywhere, you know, the school day's done. We don't have anywhere else to be. And so that there is like a spirit around the table where you feel like some of those conversations um can really happen of you know, school days or questions or, you know, somebody said this and I wasn't sure. Um, you feel like there's nobody's rushing off anymore, anywhere at that time. And so I've really um that's been a really treasured time recently, uh, just kind of around the table that's helped our family sort of slow down, even though they're maybe eating at, you know, 7:30.
SPEAKER_02But I get that. I mean, you get to set your own pace as to to what what works and what works in a season. I think to if I had any advice for anybody, it's to realize that there are seasons. And in those seasons, they can change drastically. And if you can go with the seasons, then you can find what you need at the same time, what your kids need, and what your education needs, and what your career or your spouse's career need, because it is it's fluctuating.
Hard Conversations And Letting Kids Differ
SPEAKER_01And so true. It's so true. And it's you're always re-evaluating. I mean, I feel like we're constantly reevaluating, saying, okay, this is really working. This isn't. Um, let's like tweak this and let's pow-wow, and you know, um, and that's okay. It's okay to say, like, oh, this isn't working, or this isn't, you know, flowing the way I would want it to. Let's reevaluate and make a shift. And and that is, you know.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I'm back in my school days from a long, long time ago, we were on the quarter system and I loved it because I could do anything for a quarter and then go, okay, now this quarter is going to be like that. And I think sometimes life can can go like that. Um, you know, from and I'm watching, you know, Becca and Seth with Newborn now, and what they were doing three weeks ago is not the same as what they're doing today. And it won't be the same in three weeks. So it'll, and if you can give yourself that grace. Um, and I I mean, as far as homeschooling, I I remember having um a group of mentors that had kids way older than mine. I mean, they're the ones that I wanted to homeschool because I would see them spending so much time with their kids. And I was like, well, that's cool. I mean, you're you're actually seeing your kid during the day and they're a teenager. And um, and I just remember when they got into their college years, I I looked at my friend Vanda and I went, so are you like going, good job? I got them to hear. And she's like, No, not yet. And I'm like, oh wait, that was my goal. That was and and I get it because you're in each stage and you're you're a cheerleader on the side. In the beginning, you have quite a bit to do with it. And as they age, you have less and less.
SPEAKER_05Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Um, but um, but they still still need the cheerleaders. Do you find you still need a cheerleader?
Village, Social Media, And Family Dinners
SPEAKER_01Oh, absolutely. I mean, it's it's it's amazing the um, you know, the the the way I think as women, we just question ourselves, you know, or we can always kind of have that internal, how am I doing? Maybe not so good, or you know, just where we we look for the areas that we feel like we're falling short in. And that can be sometimes our narrative instead of all the things that, you know, that mind, that mindfulness, that mindset of, you know, well, wait a second, there's a lot of wins here. Um, there's a lot of magic here. And um, I remember my husband challenged me one day. He said, Vanessa, don't miss it. Like, look at what God is doing. Don't you see what God is doing? It's like a miracle. And it's like sometimes we, you know, we're so as women, we're kind of tackling the day-to-day needs of the family and usually the problems. You know, it's like you're kind of like, okay, how do I fix that? Um, when there's just, you know, a bigger picture kind of magic happening, um, that I sometimes I have to just step back and go, wow, look at look at where we are. Um and, you know, I think that the the village is really key to that, like having people around you that inspire you um and looking for those people. Um I'm really blessed to have my parents uh here. They moved from Colorado a few years ago to Woodstock. And so that has been, you know, they're probably my biggest cheerleaders, you know, where it's just they look for the best and see the best. Um, but no, you're absolutely right. I think that sometimes challenging that self-doubt and that internal narrative of um, man, I could do this better. Uh, it's funny, interestingly too. You know, I'm such a I think when people are creative or they, you know, they like to um, you know, the that vision and kind of the dreaming tends to go with it, where you're always kind of dreaming of what could be and what could happen. And it's it's beautiful, right? It's like amazing to be able to dream and look forward. Um, but I've been struck lately by, you know, kind of everything that is and all that God has done that's right now, and just enjoying it, you know. Like I'll say to Joe, like, oh, wouldn't it be amazing? Like we could buy 10 acres and we could have this like farm venue and like, you know, this whole big plan of like what we could host dinners and just invite people to our home and just really make it, you know, have all these ideas. And then I just like looked around and he's built me this beautiful garden in the backyard and he put a chicken coop back there. And you know, I'm like looking around, going, man, that's amazing. You know, it's fun to dream, but look at everything that is. This property's amazing, you know, like this house is a is a dream. And I'm like, sometimes I feel like I, you know, in in dreaming forward, if I just kind of step back and just look at what is, you you realize how much of the dream is like right now, um, that I'm in it. And so that's been something kind of recently. Um just been kind of just kind of sitting in contentment of wow, where I am right now is really beautiful. I don't know what God'll do and you know, great things ahead. It's fun to dream and have a vision, but also like wow, the the dream is also like right now, like look at everything that is.
SPEAKER_02So I love that, and I'm also hearing it of like that doesn't mean it's all simple. Yeah, it's like you know, not some hard in there. I mean, a chicken coop alone is not easy.
SPEAKER_00Every day it's like my shoulder hurts from that garden I built. Yeah, are your dreams coming true? I'm like, thank you so much.
SPEAKER_01I'm like, yes, I love it. I love it. I'm so grateful.
SPEAKER_02That's funny. But I mean, you know, sometimes I think people can find themselves sitting in the hard and and can't even reach for that. Um, the the dream state. But it, you know, being rich can mean so many things. And a lot of times in our society, it's like how big the house is, how much you've got, how you know, all of those things. But in what ways do you feel rich? And I think you probably just covered a lot of that. But but yeah, I mean, there's differences in what others might think. What do you where where do you stand there?
Seasons, Reassessment, And Contentment
SPEAKER_01Man, that's a great question. Um man, for me, I mean, I I feel like such a driver of my life has been connection. Um, and so I I feel like that really, even that really drives the heart of Salted Oak and just really the the desire to inspire deep connection, um, and to inspire slowing down. And um so to me, that really just being able to enjoy those moments with my family and with our friends and with, you know, the people that we invite into our home, um, that to me is rich, just enjoying that connection and something that has struck me in these years, uh, that doesn't have to be complicated. You know, that does not have to be a, you know, fancy dancy spread of food or um even like a perfectly beautiful table. Um, just the being together. Um, it's something too that that's what I've loved about charcuterie is it can be very simple and still feel really, really special. Um, you know, you can throw a brick of cheese with a side of grapes and suddenly it just feels like, oh, you really like, you know, let's enjoy this together. Um, because, you know, that simplicity is is really um, it's the it's the moment um of slowing down together that is really to me what feels rich. Um and so I would say those, like those moments with my kids in the kitchen, um, just teaching them or showing them, you know, how to put something together and seeing their excitement to share what they've created with someone else and love somebody in that way, you know, like like facilitate that connection with their creativity. Um, to me, that's what makes me feel rich is just the the time together um and the connection together. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Well, you know, one of the blogs that you wrote, you talked about the inner voice and that being the loudest voice sometimes. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Tell me about that. Yeah, I think, I mean, that is something for me that that internal like self-doubt of just kind of that voice of, you know, I think social media has played a part in that. It's like social media can be such a place of inspiration where you're able to connect with just incredible people. Um, and I love that aspect of it. It can also be just a place of comparison where you feel like, you know, you're you're watching a highlight reel, um, feeling like that kind of defines someone else's space. Um, and it's just easy to kind of question yourself. I think as women today, um there is so much pressure that we place on ourselves to do everything well. Um and, you know, my mom and I have had many conversations about this, but you know, she'll talk about when she was raising me. Um, she's like, I never worried about, I never thought about all these different, you know, am I cooking organically? Um, am I, I mean, you know, you the how's your mindfulness? How's your anxiety? I mean, there's just all these things that, you know, today as a mom and a wife, it's like you're trying to do so many things well. You feel responsible for, you know, so much of their well-being in all these areas of life. And I think there can be um a lot of hats we wear and a lot of pressure we feel, especially, you know, you had homeschooling to it and you're kind of taking on their education. Um, there can be just just an internal dialogue of doubt. You know, what am I falling short in? What is it, what if it's gonna be, what if it's detrimental to my family in some way? Um and I think versus when I shift that and walk in faith and realize that it's it's it's really God carrying them, not me. Um I'm, you know, he's just working through me. And so that sort of takes that self-reliance piece that can be that, you know, that loud voice of self-doubt and fear. Um, because sometimes I found my intentionality was driven by fear more than faith, like a fear of I'm gonna drop the ball in some way and it's gonna really um my my kids are gonna suffer. Instead of no, if this is driven by faith, um, sure, I want to be intentional, but if I really believe it's in God's hands, I can like rest in it and and know that that he's got it. Um, even in those areas that maybe are not, you know, I'm gonna I am gonna fall short, like a lot. Um, and that's okay. They're still gonna thrive.
SPEAKER_02So well, Vanessa, when I look at you from the outside, I go, wow, she's got it together. She has no boulders that she hits up against every day. Um am I wrong? Or are there things that you hit on the daily, or there's something in your path that you constantly are going around or over or not quite through?
Richness As Connection Not Things
SPEAKER_01Man, great question. Um, I mean, I feel like for me that, I mean, you brought up, you know, balancing and kind of like trying to to carry all the different, you know, spin the different plates. Um I feel like for me, that is, you know, that is the challenge and kind of the the resting in that, like resting in my faith. Um, because my tendency and my nature is to just pick it up myself and to want to um be, you know, self-reliant and to carry, carry it myself. Um and so I would say that that internal dialogue, even that I wrote about in that article, um is you know, that that sense of yeah, falling short and just putting that at God's feet. To me, I feel like I have to battle that just regularly. Um just that own internal narrative. Um and you know, I'm 47 and so I'm definitely in the throes of like hormonal shifts. And you know, even my husband this week, he's like, ooh, you're a little, you're a little spicy this week. Somebody's a little edgy. And I was like, Oh, am I? But it's like, you know, as we're as we're changing and we're getting older, um those, you know, that bandwidth, I find like my bandwidth of tolerance is like a little, you know, it's stretched. Um and so I think that that for me, you know, is just that trying to, you know, show up for my family. It's um I I I've come to realize how much that self-care is so important. Um and I feel like that to me is probably kind of I feel like currently that shift of realizing, man, if if I don't, I I need to really take care of myself um and prioritize um slowing down. Um indifferent, how do I say that? Like uh yeah, slowing down, like in like taking care of uh just my own health and that fit that faith component becomes so important um of just you know realizing that yeah, we've just got to really rest. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02What does self-care mean to you? I mean, it you you alluded to it earlier of you know things being, you know, these trendy things and and and such, but but what does real self-care mean for you? And if you were talking to a mom out there that's balancing some of the same things you might be, what what would you say, here's the here's the self-care key?
The Loud Inner Voice And Faith
SPEAKER_01Man, I don't know if I have it all figured out. I don't think so, but I will. Um I would say core is is remembering who God is. Um I think when you when you realize just how much God is fighting for you and is holding on to you. That is, I think, resting in that. So for me, the my my core would be like what I'm telling myself in here in my mind, um that I've gotta carry it and hold on to it versus when I realize no God is really fighting for me and I remember who God is. So I feel like staying really anchored in that to me is the foundation for me for you know, all of my bandwidth, but but also just my my heart health, my soul health. Um when I'm sitting in that space of just realizing that he's got me. Um I'm more patient, I'm not anxious, I feel like it really changes um just my narrative and my my perspective completely. Um and then secondary to that, I think just feeling like I can, you know, even in that, like let like put down some of the plates that I'm spinning and realizing, okay, if if I'm if I'm not rested, um, if I'm not hydrated, water is like my worst thing ever. You talk about challenges in a really practical way.
SPEAKER_00My husband's like, could you just drink a glass of water? It's water. I'm like, oh my gosh, I can, you know, can't put the coffee down, but I just drink a glass of water.
SPEAKER_01Um, but I think just that that rest um and you know, movement of just, you know, go take a walk. I love that fall is coming, the leaves are coming out, you know, just starting to, I've just started again to exercise for the first time in years. Um, because you do, you reach this space in your life where it's like, wow, this is like my my crossroads. Um, that's either gonna go this way or this way. And um it's you know, silver is kind of going this way. So you just needing to kind of just on a practical way, just you know, um, hey kids, you're gonna, I'm gonna kind of table this right now, but I'm gonna go take a walk. I'm gonna go um do a little Pilates. Um and just take care of my, I think those are the practical ways. But I know my my faith, I would say, is kind of my my core when when that is on straight and I'm remembering who God is, um it it's everything kind of flows from that.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I can I can relate to that and um so much of it has to be a conscious effort. You can't you can't go in neutral. Um because neutral will take you a long way. And then all of a sudden it's like, wait, wait, wait, I have no traction. So that that becomes real. Well, tell me how salted oak works. I mean, uh we've we've talked all around it and we've talked about some of the aspects of it, but how does it work? Who would who would look at you and go, yeah, that's what I need? And how do they uh how do they incorporate some of um salted oak into their lives?
Hormones, Self-Care, And Rest
SPEAKER_01Oh yeah, great. Thank you. Great question. Um, so you know, my primary form of contact is uh social media, Instagram. Um, that is a great place to be able to see, you know, different pieces and work that has gone out. Um, we do also have a website that has not been as updated recently with pieces, but will be, especially as we enter kind of gathering season. Um, but that is a great place if somebody wanted to either order a piece or um was looking to purchase a piece. Um, the social media and the Instagram account at salted.oak is a great way to reach me. There's also a website. Um, and so you know, I I can do people can either order pieces or I'm happy to help someone with like an event if they want to do like a table spread um, you know, of like flowers and pieces. Um reaching me through that uh Instagram handle is great. And so that's also a great way to get hold of me. Yeah. And any piece can be engraved, so that's nice too. If somebody wants to, you know, that's kind of what makes our pieces unique is you can add any phrase or name or anything like that.
SPEAKER_02Um that's fun. All right, you mentioned as the gathering season.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_02Talk to me about that because so often we say, you know, the holidays. The holidays. Talk to me about why you say the gathering season.
SPEAKER_01Oh, I think it's just um, there's just something in the air about, you know, as we do approach the holidays, um, I think the weather's cooler, kind of the whole like, you know, comfort foods and like some of these like really special family dishes. Um, I just think it's such an incredible time to really, you know, it's always a great time to have people in your home, but I think there's something in the air of just wanting to gather and connect and kind of start to make memories around the table. Um, you know, in the summer it just feels a little different. Everybody's hot. Come on over, I'll give you a piece of fruit and a salad. Um but you know, in this kind of season is your, you know, the the weather cools down and um I think there is just this desire to connect and kind of drive to like just make these really special memories around the table. Um that's how I do. I think of it as like, ooh, it's in the air. Let's get our pumpkin latte and like curl up in front of the fire with our spread.
SPEAKER_02Spread, that makes all the difference. So what kind of challenge would you put out there for a mom who's maybe your peer? Ooh, challenge.
SPEAKER_01That's a great question. Um Man, I I would just say enjoy what is today. Like just to really like, you know, we all have there's like, you know, challenge, there's seasons where you feel like I'm just trying to get out of bed, right? There's like those those seasons where we're really in the middle of a loss or something really hard. I mean, sometimes it's just hard to um, you know, there's definitely seasons where you go, wow, this is hard to be grateful today. Um, but that would be my to look for the things that are um like the dream that exists today. Um, there was like many years in my life, you know, I became a wife and a mom later. Um, and there was years I thought I'm I don't know if I'm gonna get to be a wife. I don't know if I'm gonna get to be a mom. Um, and so there's times that I just kind of sit and go, man, I'm a I'm a wife. Like I, you know, I found him. You know, there he is. Um, I have two girls. Like, what a dream. Um, and so I think just kind of dwelling in that space, I think contentment and gratitude is so powerful. Um, and then even, you know, as you you sit down to dinner, and sometimes it is, you're like, okay, everybody, we're gonna have, we'll call them, you know, Asian noodles, top ramen tonight. You know, whatever it is, it's like you can throw it in a bowl and make it a memory, you know, like every year here we go, everybody sit around the table. So it doesn't always have to be grand or even pretty. Um, but it's like, man, I'm just gonna enjoy whatever it is today and look for those things that are that are the magic.
SPEAKER_02I love that. And you're so right. I mean, can you remember growing up when a bowl of cereal was just like the ultimate?
SPEAKER_01Gosh, when we'd go on vacation and I'd get like cocoa puffs, it was like I know, right? I wish I got cocoa puffs. Yeah, it's true.
How To Work With Salted Oak
SPEAKER_02Um, it's so true. That's funny. Complete this sentence for me. We were put on this earth to man, um, I would say connect with God and love people. And that's what you're doing through your nursing, your homeschooling, your salted oak. Uh there just seems to be all of this um that's working in unison. Um but when you have a day where it's not working in unison, where do you turn? Who do you go to? Is that when it's important to have had your village put together in your faith?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I would say those two um, those two things. And you know, as you're busy, sometimes, you know, we've got we've got a really um close village, but even that, I mean, sometimes when you're kind of drowning in your, you know, the things on your plate, fighting for that connection, you know. I mean, there's times I just throw out a text or pick up the phone and just say, hey friend, um, ooh, it's been a rough day. Um, and kind of having those, that village on speed dial um when you need them is really, you know, is is really key. So I I think that that that's where like my um that bandwidth, you know, is really just in my faith and and then in those people um that are those like those inspirational voices that you know, like you said, cheerleaders, you know, that see the best um and can help you laugh, you know, and just kind of not take it all maybe so seriously. Um I've got a couple of those friends, I'm sure we all do. My mom is one that can take any tragedy and make it funny. I mean, just you know, she can find the humor in anything. And that's so key, you know, to that you go, even in the really hard where you go, there is nothing funny about this. You just have to kind of go, okay, I'm gonna like it's just life is life, and I'm you know, headed for heaven. And you know, that's just kind of that of just to take that deep breath and kind of let go.
SPEAKER_02Um I don't know if that helps. I think that's great. Um, we've talked about so many different things, and I just is there anything that we didn't bring up that you want to make sure we touch on?
Gathering Season Mindset
SPEAKER_01I mean, I um I would say, I mean, I hope that really, you know, my the the business and you know, it's so funny, like you said, all these different areas of of life are so related. Um and so, you know, I I hope that really, you know, salted oak for me has been such a a side endeavor of a creative, you know, creative outlet. Um, but I do hope it really inspires connection um and just inspires people to feel like they can slow down and that they can just have these really special moments. Um, they're empowered to have those moments um just around the table. So I just I really appreciate. I'm so grateful to be able to just, you know, honored to get to meet you and spend this time.
SPEAKER_02Oh, likewise, likewise. So tell us again how people get um in touch with you, your website name, and and and following you on any of your social media.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, so we're um we're on Instagram, it's at salted.oak. Um, there is a website there that you'll see um on that Instagram handle um listed there. It's visit saltedoak um dot com. And um the Facebook page is salted oak. And so um we're you know, also there. So that's probably the easiest way to get is to send me a message on social media um if you're looking for a piece. Um, and then there's content there of kind of easy ways to use your boards and um the flowers kind of go with that too, table flowers and different, different things. And then if there's yeah, if there's any event or um if you wanted kind of the the base setup for any uh parties or events, I'm always happy to help with um kind of the flower table decor. Um, you know, I love trying to bring that just natural aesthetic and do a pretty table if people are looking for that or would like help with that. Um happy to do it.
SPEAKER_02That's wonderful. Sounds fun. Vanessa, I have one more question. And that is if you had a superpower, you had it for 24 hours, you can use it personally or professionally. What superpower would you choose? How would you use it? And I really always like to know why it is your choice.
A Challenge To Moms
SPEAKER_01Oh, my superpower. That is a great that's a really good question. Um I would say if I could maximize my time. If I could take my 24 hours and make it 48 hours and not get tired, that is what I would. I would, I feel like I have do you have so many ideas and so much energy and so many things I want to do, and you just run out of time. Um, and so I would, I would think, I was like, is it possible to make 24 hours, 48 hours, and to be able to just soak up and use all of it? Um, that is what I would, that's what I'd wish for.
SPEAKER_02That is funny, and I am not surprised because I can see you you needing more hours every day.
SPEAKER_03So that's funny.
SPEAKER_02Vanessa, thank you. It's been an absolute joy.
SPEAKER_00Oh, thank you so much. I feel the same. It was so wonderful to connect with you. Thanks.
SPEAKER_02Or anywhere you get your favorite podcast, listen. You'll laugh out loud, you'll cry a little, you'll find yourself encouraged. Join us for casual conversation that leads itself based on where we take it, from family to philosophy to work to meal prep, to beautifully surviving life. And hey, if I could ask a big favor of you, go to iTunes and give us a five rating. The more people who rate us, the more we get this podcast out there. Thanks. I appreciate it.