Movement As Medicine

What if the fastest way to quiet a racing mind starts with a slow walk?  Our own journeys from duty-focused fitness to recovery-focused movement highlight a simple truth: when the goal shifts from performance to regulation, exercise becomes more sustainable and more helpful.

We talk about redefining fitness after law enforcement, when strength once felt like armor and speed felt like survival. We share stories about injuries, overtraining, and the post-achievement crash that hits after big races or PRs. The fix isn’t another extreme plan; it’s flexibility, grace, and small, repeatable wins that stabilize your week.

If trauma is stored in the body, the body must be part of the solution.  You’ll hear practical ways to start when you are struggling: 10-minute outdoor walks, easy strength sessions that end with energy left, and nature time. We also cover how to navigate busy seasons, break the all-or-nothing mindset, and build routines that feel good on ordinary days, not just finish-line moments.

Walk away with realistic steps that fit your life: less pressure, more presence, and movement that supports your mental health instead of draining it. If this resonates, follow the show, share it with someone who needs a nudge, and leave a quick review - then tell us: what small step are you taking this week?

If you or someone you know is in crisis and at risk of self-harm, please call or text 988, the suicide and crisis lifeline. 

To contact us directly send an email to  Dan@10-42project.org  or call 515-350-6274
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Transcript

Welcome And Topic Setup

SPEAKER_03 0:08

Welcome back. I did this fine with greenhead, but now it's like you're staring at me and it's made me nervous.

SPEAKER_02 0:18

I won't look. I won't look. Do it.

SPEAKER_01 0:22

I'm just gonna laugh.

SPEAKER_03 0:24

Welcome back to another episode of the Shared Voices podcast. I am Gentry and I am here with Jake. Hi, Jake.

SPEAKER_02 0:32

Hello, Gentry.

Fitness As Constant And Escape

SPEAKER_03 0:34

Um today's episode, we don't have Dan with us today, but we're gonna do an episode kind of um it's about fitness and mental health. And fitness is a really broad term. So what we're gonna to narrow it down a little bit, um specifically talking more about like the movement side of things and mental health. Um so what I want to start with is kind of clarifying what fitness means to the both of us, um, and then diving into a few other things. So just I'll I'll start here. Um but for me, fitness, what fitness means to me, it's so it's kind of had a couple different meanings throughout life, but I want to give two specific times um in life with two very different definitions. I don't know that might sound a little confusing, but what I want to say is so when I was a cop, my you know, and when I was going through some um personal trauma stuff with my assault and things like that, fitness to me kind of meant like, you know, if I'm strong and fit, that means that I have a better chance of going home at the end of my shift, right? Which, yes, being, you know, quote unquote fit is a good thing for law enforcement officers. Do not get me wrong. Like, you don't want to be an out-of-shape cop by any means. But um, you know, being physically fit isn't the only thing that gets you home at the end of the shift. So it was a little bit of a skewed view. But for me now, what it means is, and as cheesy as it sounds, it's really a a way for me to fight my own demons in a way. So that's how I fight, you know, or a tool, I guess, that God has given me to fight the anxiety, the PTSD, the depression, um, and help me continue to move forward and heal. So, Jake, I'm curious, you know, specifically talking about the times of when you were like really going through it. Um in your law enforcement career, personal career or personal life, you know, when you're really going through stuff and then kind of what it looks like now. Like, what does fitness mean to you? And what is it?

SPEAKER_02 2:51

That's a great question. And I have a similar response to what you said. I had some some trauma when I was younger and um turned to fitness, in particular weightlifting at a pretty young age, as a way to get strong and feel like nobody could mess with me. And that's really where it began. But then it transferred into sports through middle school and high school. I got into wrestling and football and um got really dedicated to fitness just for for the sake of it, for the sake of sports. Um and what I've realized, I guess, looking back is from the time that I started lifting and running until now, it's just always been a constant. You know, working out has always been a constant and it's always been predictable. Um it's always just a place where I can go, you know, especially now that I have a gym in my house. I go into my gym and my house, it's just me. It's just me versus me. And then the outside world quiets down. It's a little bit of an escape, and it's just it's the world gets simple. I just focus on moving the weight and then focus on the the break between sets. And from so yeah, from the first workout until now, that's just been true. When I became a cop, I had some similar thoughts about it that uh I needed to be strong, I needed to be fit in order to defend myself and to protect the public. And um that added another layer, I think. You know, I got I got really into heavy lifting for a long time, thinking that I needed to be the strongest. And you know, it served me well on duty, but was it absolutely necessary? Probably not. Um, I also had a a real affinity for foot chases. And so when I would start to get too big and get too slow, I would eventually have a foot chase where I could feel it, and then I'd say, I gotta start running, and I'd go do a bunch of sprints just because I never never wanted to lose. Um, and then yeah, post-law enforcement into you know dealing with PTSD and some of the addiction problems I've had since since quitting. Um it's gone back to just being that constant. It's gone back to just being that escape where at times when my mind feels like it's on fire or my life feels like it's on fire, it's an hour out of the day where that I I don't think about that. You know, it's it's a it's a break, it's an escape. And you know, this is something we talked about before we started recording too. I I firmly believe trauma is stored in the body. And so every time I move my body, my PTSD symptoms are improved. They don't, you know, they don't go away. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 5:24

But um I would agree.

SPEAKER_02 5:26

Yeah, I guess that's a long answer, but it it's it's you know, I've been working out for like 20 plus years. So it's it's it's evolved over time.

Injury Setbacks And Mental Health

SPEAKER_03 5:34

And I think it's a good thing to talk about at the beginning of this episode to give people some context, kind of it's where we're coming from um and how it's looked on our healing journey. But I'm actually curious now. So I've had this, but I'm curious if you've had this. Um, have you ever had like an injury or anything in life to where like you, you know, you're down for a while, right? Like you can't go run, you can't go lift heavy, you can't, you know, go do whatever you know exercise you want to do because your body needs to heal, like you physically cannot do it. Have you ever had any situations like that in life? And I'm not sure. If you don't, that's good. But I was just curious because if you had, do you think that affected like your your mental status a little bit, not being able to move?

SPEAKER_02 6:26

So I've never had an injury so significant that I couldn't do anything. But I've had definitely had time, many times where I've gotten really into lifting and then injured myself in a way that prevented me from lifting the way I wanted to lift. And I've had the same with running where I've had overuse injuries from running that prevent me from running. And yes, you know, like how does it affect Yeah?

SPEAKER_03 6:49

I was just curious if it, you know, like do you feel like anxiety increased in those times or depression or anything? Like if you couldn't do what you really wanted to do.

SPEAKER_02 6:57

Definitely at times in my life where I've relied very heavily on those outlets and I've had that injury and I couldn't do it, it has been very problematic. At this point, I've come a long way. And so if I'm injured, I'm injured. I actually hurt my shoulder the other day and can't do any pressing motions, can't bench, but I just do other stuff and it's okay.

What Training Helps Most

SPEAKER_03 7:17

It's a it's a tool. Like I think maybe you know, you and I both now look at it as like another tool in your toolbox, right? To help deal with things. Um so what this is an interesting question for me. Um, but what type of training feels the most beneficial for you to like you know, help your anxiety, help your depression, and help you process things for me now. Mine is running. But back, like I'd say, you know, my early 20s, it was definitely like lifting heavy things, right? That was that was what I wanted to do, and running wasn't super on the radar, but it is like completely transitioned for me over the years, which I find really interesting. But I'm curious what your thoughts are.

SPEAKER_02 8:09

I go back and forth. Uh really for the most for the most, I guess no matter what, running like a nice long, slow run, like that's the best for processing. It's it's for me. I have a lot of noise in my in my mind at a baseline that I've like I said, I've come a long way and I've learned to just kind of live with it. But when I run, it that goes away. And I can I can kind of think about a certain thing or I can process through a situation, or you know, if I have some sort of challenge in my life, I can kind of think about it while I'm running. Um, but I go back and forth. I I'll get way into running, and then one day I'll just be like, I'm tired of running. And I get then I get way into lifting.

SPEAKER_03 8:50

Back into lifting.

SPEAKER_02 8:51

And then I'm kind of at this point now with lifting where I'm like, I'm kind of tired of lifting, and so I'm gonna get back into running.

SPEAKER_03 8:57

Marathon, marathon time.

SPEAKER_02 9:00

We'll see. We'll see if I injure myself. I have calf problems, so we'll see if I get a calf injury or not.

SPEAKER_03 9:07

Des Moine marathon, that's the way to go.

SPEAKER_02 9:09

If I can, I will.

SPEAKER_03 9:11

Um so what is a how old are you?

SPEAKER_02 9:18

36.

Chasing Goals And The Letdown

SPEAKER_03 9:19

36. So in your 36 years of life, what is a workout experience you've had that has stuck with you for a long time and meant meant a lot to you? So for example, just gonna use mine. I did a that 30 mile thing a few weeks ago back in November. Um and I don't think we've released an episode talking or me talking about that. Um, but I did like a a 12-mile ruck with 35 pounds on a Saturday. And then after that, I did a five-mile unweighted run. And then the next day I did a 13-mile unweighted, you know, run walk or whatever. So a total of 30 miles. Um, and it was through this um army guy, gritty soldier, um, that was doing this challenge. And you get like cool challenge coin, dog tags, all this stuff, right? And that was something that stuck with me because that Saturday, when I was doing those 17 miles, that was like the least amount of anxiety that I have felt in so, so long. Um and it just that kind of blew my mind to be honest. But then, and I mentioned this to you before how the next day, so it'd be like Sunday night and then clear through till it was roughly like Wednesday, I felt like total garbage. Like, obviously, yes, physically you're not gonna feel the greatest, but like mentally, I was off in about every way that I could be off. Like, I was anxious, depressed. I mean, I just felt like junk. Um, and then this is where I wanted to bring up I can't remember exactly how you said it, but it it was we talked about before how uh the chase. Do you remember what I'm talking about?

SPEAKER_02 11:13

The thrill of the chase, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 11:14

The thrill of the chase, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's um, but what was the other thing with it? The thrill of the chase, and then oh, you're just not satisfied. It's like that that chase and the journey of it, but then once you get there, it doesn't fix your anxiety, it doesn't fix your depression, it doesn't fix your PTSD or whatever. Um, and we had that conversation after I had done this 30-mile thing, and so the that workout experience and then added to the conversation that I had with you, that was just mind-blowing to me.

SPEAKER_02 11:45

I'm glad. So that was just me sharing my own experience of something that I've done repeatedly my entire life.

SPEAKER_03 11:51

Still working on the solution?

SPEAKER_02 11:53

I don't know what the solution is, but yeah, awareness goes a long way, I think.

SPEAKER_03 11:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 11:59

Uh, but I've done that. Yeah. I mean, I ran a marathon, I've run a half marathon, I've hit, you know, different weightlifting numbers. And when I'm working up to that, I I hit this phase, you know, even training, you know, like this the preparation phase of just being so driven. And I can it's because I can look at my entire week and say, here's what I'm doing to train this day, that day, you know, it's all for a purpose. And I've definitely set up different events or different, you know achievements on a pedestal. And then I get there and I go, Oh, like I'm still I'm still just me. Like that didn't fix me. And I've had that big letdown. Not so much anymore, but I also don't really set that big a goals anymore. Um, so I yeah, I don't know what the solution is, but I've done that a lot.

SPEAKER_03 12:46

What is uh so have you had a it could be literally anytime, but like a workout, a specific workout that you've done over the years could be like even in your garage where you've just had like a I don't know, like the a light bulb moment to anything in life, you know?

SPEAKER_02 13:04

Like um just repeatedly, over and over. Repeatedly. Yeah. Trying to figure, trying to like pinpoint one. You're you're asking, like, have I ever had a workout that felt like monumental?

SPEAKER_03 13:13

Yeah, or it and it doesn't even have to be anything crazy, right? Like it could literally just be leg day in your garage. But like, I don't know. I feel like that's a time when you know, God's given me the passion for fitness, right? The passion to to move and to do hard things that not maybe a lot of people want to do. Like, not a lot of people want to go run a marathon, right? But like I feel like in my movement times is when I just learn a lot about me, and I feel like it's a time for God to like me to be really close to him. And I just didn't know if you've had it ever had a time where it was like, you know, like you just feel like he's revealing something that you to you about you that you just you know you hadn't thought about before, or maybe it's like a new business idea or something like that. I just was curious if is that your thinking time too?

SPEAKER_02 14:07

Like, yeah, yeah. And the problem is it that happens all the time. But I don't I don't know that I can come up with an answer, but that's one of the things I like the most about running. When you're asking about like a specific workout, I think about the like my best 10 mile run that I ever did. For the longest time, I wanted to be able to run 10 miles at under a nine-minute pace. So 10 miles in 90 minutes. And one time I went, I this is a while ago, uh probably 2019 or 2020. Um, I went running thinking I was just gonna do a like a two or three mile run, but I just it was one of those days. And I was like, I've got I've got more to go. And so I just like Forrest Gump, I just like kept kept running. And then I looked, I was like looking at my watch and I was like, I could do it, I could do this nine minute pace for 10 miles, and I did. And it was my time was like an hour, 29 minutes, and like 58 seconds. It was so close. Let's go! It was so close, but but it was just an easy run. Like it it didn't feel hard. I wasn't like suffering, I wasn't like dividing up, you know, all right, I got four miles. That's just two miles, two miles twice. You know, like I wasn't doing that whole thing, it just felt good. And I I think about that run a lot, but I had that whole letdown thing too, because what I wish now, what I wish I would have done is build on that, right? But I hit that milestone and then I think I just stopped running for quite a while after that.

Consistency Through Busy Seasons

SPEAKER_03 15:26

Um, so kind of a next the next question how do you stay consistent with working out when you're going through harder days? And or like, you know, you have a busy week, like you have two little kids, right? So like maybe your kids have things going on all week and it's hard to find time to to get things done. How do you stay consistent when you don't always want to be?

SPEAKER_02 15:53

I've just learned to be a lot less rigid. I used to get these workout programs and I used to think that I had to do every single set and every single rep. And I used to have this like really rigid pre-workout routine where I drank, you know, pre-workout powder and everybody had to leave me alone and I had to like get in the zone. I've just become a lot more flexible. Like, if I can work out in the morning, if I have time then, I'll do it. If I have to work out at you know 9 p.m., I'll do it then. And also I just give myself the grace to just miss one. Like it's okay, it's not the end of the world if if a busy day comes up or if I just don't feel like it. That has been a big, a big uh shift for me. Because like if I just don't feel like it, sometimes I just won't.

SPEAKER_03 16:33

Yeah, I'm yeah, I agree with that. And it's okay to not be perfect, like nobody is going to be perfect, and no workout, you're not gonna have you know, every single workout's not gonna be insane, right? Like, you don't need to kill yourself every single workout in order to get a good workout, even like going on a walk.

SPEAKER_02 16:51

Yeah, like that's I've become a big walker.

SPEAKER_03 16:53

Yeah, I walk my dogs a lot. Not now because it's absolutely freezing.

SPEAKER_02 16:57

But you know me, I love cold weather walking and running.

SPEAKER_03 17:02

You can hang out out there, I'll stay inside in the heat.

SPEAKER_02 17:05

I'm hot, I'm just hot all the time. So if I run in the summer, I've got a mile or two before I just am covered in sweat.

SPEAKER_03 17:12

Like I so like the humidity is probably horrible for you.

SPEAKER_02 17:16

I look wet. I look I look like I got out of the swimming pool. So running in the winter, I have I still sweat a ton, but I can get to like four or five miles before I get like soaking wet.

SPEAKER_03 17:27

So interesting. I just sweat so much. I do not like running outside in the winter. Not at all.

SPEAKER_02 17:31

Oh, that's great. I'm actually, I think I'm gonna do it today five times.

SPEAKER_03 17:33

Have you ever slept on the ice and like hurt yourself?

SPEAKER_02 17:36

Uh not hurt myself, but I slip on the ice all the time.

SPEAKER_03 17:38

You fall on your butt a lot?

SPEAKER_02 17:40

No. No, don't. I don't think I've I don't think so. I remember one time it was like there was nothing, it was not the winter time, it was like perfect weather. And I was running. This was in Iowa City, and there was just like a slightly raised like section of the sidewalk, and I just wasn't looking, and I just tripped and just like I fell so hard. Like I was not running fast, I was running like a 10 or 11 minute pace or whatever, just to just a jog or whatever. And I tripped and I hit like there was like a smack, and this guy, this guy came running out of his garage. He's like, Are you okay? I was like, Yeah, I'm just yeah, I don't know what happened. I just fell over, but no, that's never happened on the ice. I've I've like slipped a lot and had a lot of those, like, you know, like you're sliding, but you just you just have to slow, you just have to slow down, and you have to like that's another thing I like about running when there is ice and snow, is you have to like focus. You have to look at it, you have to be in the zone. Speaking of that's interesting. When I go to Colorado, which I'm going at the end of this month, my in-laws live there. I always go trail running.

SPEAKER_03 18:44

That's a blast.

SPEAKER_02 18:45

It is, and it's the same thing. You have to be looking at where your next step is.

SPEAKER_03 18:48

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_02 18:49

It adds another level of like in the zone. Like you, I sometimes I can't even listen to music because it's too distracting. I have to just like focus on it.

SPEAKER_03 18:56

What's it like to go from Iowa to running in the mountains?

SPEAKER_02 18:59

Yeah, it's rough. It's rough. I I say running, it's a loose term. I got you. I got you. It's like fast hiking.

Nature, Walking, And Starting Small

SPEAKER_03 19:07

I thought that'd be nice, though. I would love to run in the mountains. Um, another question. So, what advice would you give a first responder or, you know, a it could even be a spouse of a first responder who feels so overwhelmed with life right now, whether they're depressed, anxious, whatever it is, and you know, and they can't even like they feel like they can't even get out of bed. Or if they get out of bed, you know, that's the win for the day, right? The fact that they even got up. What advice would you give them to just get started with any kind of movement? And it doesn't even have to be like a weight loss journey or anything like that. Just somebody that wants to start moving to just feel better in their body, right? Like nobody sitting around on the couch all day isn't like not really doing a whole lot for yourself. Like, how do you just go? Like How do you start?

SPEAKER_02 20:00

This is a good question because I think a lot of first responders, especially like us who leave that leave the career on not such great terms, tend to go from like super fit, like very capable, to like this long period of depression or isolation or whatever. And then and then we expect ourselves to be able to perform like we did right out of the academy. And it's just not realistic. So the short answer would be walking counts. Like walking absolutely counts.

SPEAKER_01 20:29

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 20:29

And especially if you couple that with like getting in nature, you know, if you live in a if you live in a city, go to a park, um, you know, like I live in a suburb, but I still go to like the state park or the county parks or whatever. Couple walking with time and nature, even 20 minutes makes a world of difference in the way you feel. And so, yeah, you just can't expect yourself to jump right back up to where you were benching 315 and you know running an eight-minute mile or whatever you did at the academy.

Key Takeaway: Trauma In The Body

SPEAKER_03 21:00

Have grace with yourself. And it's progress is at your own pace, right? Like you don't have to be setting bench PRs, you know, every week and doing crazy stuff like that. Like 10-minute walk every day for five days, next week 15 minutes. Like progress is it's at your own pace. Um, and then last thing to kind of leave everybody with, you know, what's what's the one big thing that you would want somebody to take away from this episode? Because I don't want this episode to just be like another fitness episode, right? Like I don't want to just sit here and talk about exercises and I don't want to just, you know, people to listen to this and be like, I don't have time to go to the gym or whatever. Like, it's not about any of that. It's not about whether you have time to to get, you know, to go to the gym and to to lift weights, to go on a run, whatever. It's not about any of that. It's it's about your movement and mental health and the benefits that come with movement and how it affects your mental your mental health. Neither one of us are therapists or doctors or anything like that. We're just two people that have really been through a lot of stuff in life and have found movement to be a very, very good tool. So, what is just you know, one thing that somebody, you know, that could take from this episode, literally just one thing to help them.

SPEAKER_02 22:19

Yeah. So I alluded to it earlier, but it's just the simple fact that trauma is stored in the body. Right. It took me a really long time to recognize that if you want to address trauma, especially when it gets to the point of PTSD, you have to take two different approaches, a top-down and a bottom-up approach. And the top-down approach is what everyone does with talk therapy and taking, you know, traditional medications and stuff. But the bottom-up approach means you have to address the way that your body responds because all that trauma is imprinted on your nervous system. And while you're going through that and while you're trying to live with a with a really sensitive nervous system, every bit of movement that you can do lessens those symptoms. Obviously, you want to find a therapist and do things like EMDR or ART or ketamine or you know, whatever, like some sort of somatic processing over time that's going to lessen how reactive your body is. But in the immediate, like in the present, when you're still stuck with that over-reactive uh uh nervous system, every bit of movement makes that better. And so that's why I'm saying walking counts. If you as opposed to staying inside all day, a 10-minute walk outside is going to have a massive improvement on the way your body feels and the way you feel in your body. And anything above and beyond that, I mean you get to a point where you're running for 30 minutes or 60 minutes, right? You see, we know this, this is why we do it all the time. You see this massive improvement. Um, that's a long way of saying trauma stored in the body, and exercise is a great tool for dealing with it.

Resources And How To Reach Us

SPEAKER_03 23:53

I agree with that. Well, I hope you guys took something good from this episode. And like I said, I don't want this to just be like a fitness influencer type episode, right? This is about mental health and about movement and the benefits that come from it. Um so if you guys have any questions about any, you know, getting started and things like that, me or Jake would be glad to talk to you. Um my email is at gentry g-e-n-t-r-y at 10-42project.org. And Jake's is same thing, just Jake. Jake, J A K E at 10-42project.org. Um, but either one of us would be happy to to go on walks with you or just you know help come up with a little bit of a plan to help you start getting some movement in. So I hope you guys enjoyed this episode, and we'll see you in the next one.