Wayne | Ep 7: "It'll Last Forever" Part 2

WAYNE ON YOUTUBE

The Tedcast is a deep dive podcast exploring the masterpieces that are Ted Lasso on Apple TV+ and Wayne on YouTube.

Sponsored by Pajiba and The Antagonist, join Boss Emily Chambers and Coaches Bishop and Castleton as they ruminate on all things AFC Richmond.

Boss Emily Chambers
Coach Bishop
Coach Castleton

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:22

Welcome to our Ted Lasso talk, the Tedcast. Welcome all Greyhound fans, welcome all you sinners from the dog track and all the AFC Richmond fans around the world. It's the lasso way around these parts with Coach, coach and Boss, without further ado, coach Castleton.

Speaker 2: 0:39

You develop your Netflix special Like I would pro bono, beyond the writing staff, because that line I mean, like what kind of thing is that to say? That's the only thing I would say again.

Speaker 3: 1:00

I said the only thing I've ever been responsible for in my life. I killed on purpose. She was a dog. It was time. Come on, this was like legal. The vet did it and knew what was happening?

Speaker 2: 1:12

Tell me you can hear that in like a promo reel for some upcoming Netflix comedy special. Tell me right now you can hear that right now.

Speaker 3: 1:23

I'm just saying I shouldn't be responsible for something that is going to outlive me.

Speaker 2: 1:27

This is about me having children.

Speaker 3: 1:28

I shouldn't. I want the doctor to set my uterus on fire. It's the most badass thing I could think of. Fuck you eggs, Burn down your house.

Speaker 2: 1:39

Fuck you eggs.

Speaker 3: 1:40

And that's actually like a real that's a legit fuck you.

Speaker 1: 1:43

according to Alabama Like who knows, maybe the eggs will say fuck you back. That's mass murder.

Speaker 2: 1:49

Pick it. I don't know who the fuck knows. I don't even understand. I don't understand any of this anymore.

Speaker 4: 1:53

Listen, in the world of eggs, one thing you don't wake up every day as an egg thinking is shit's going to burn in here, like that, yeah. That is one thing that is very, very deep down the list.

Speaker 3: 2:06

I'm about to be sunny side up like a motherfucker. Yeah, yeah, I mean actually. Yeah, you know what, now that I think about it, that is the way that most eggs end up. Well, maybe not most. All of the eggs that I've come into contact with eventually end up in a pan of some sort.

Speaker 2: 2:24

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 3: 2:26

Yeah, Something to think about Also. My eggs have to be dead. Just like my age and general health. They can't be viable anymore.

Speaker 4: 2:36

So, fingers crossed, I feel like your eggs might still be viable in a way like where it's like they're wearing a leather jacket and smoking and you're like it's like a Keith Richards kind of viability.

Speaker 3: 2:49

You know, like oh, the ones that are left are the Ozzy Osbourne where they had such a high tolerance for drugs, that it could get them.

Speaker 2: 2:58

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I can test that theory they down there smoke a little microscopic cigarettes and joints and shit.

Speaker 4: 3:06

Yeah, yep, yeah, and complaining about the quality, this is all we have. Are you serious? You know she's up there getting the good shit and we get this trickle down horse, horse, crap.

Speaker 3: 3:20

Yeah, now I'm thinking, maybe I could get a scientist to cut my ovaries out, put them in different levels of drugs and see what they do. All right, yeah, like one in straight vodka whiskey. Actually, let's get real. Yeah. They prefer whiskey and another one in like a. It would need to be harder drugs. I feel like nobody's ever overdosed on mushrooms.

Speaker 2: 3:43

No. I don't have a bad trip but I don't think we can open up something. No, it's actually all psychedelics. They scare the shit out of us, but they ain't going to kill you.

Speaker 3: 3:51

Yeah.

Speaker 2: 3:52

You might be people.

Speaker 3: 3:53

And sometimes, sometimes some people I've heard I'm not naming names, but sometimes people take a small amount of mushrooms and then watch last week tonight with John Oliver until he gets so shiny that you have to put him away for a little bit and watch him in the morning. Theoretically that could happen.

Speaker 2: 4:16

Theoretically that might happen to one.

Speaker 4: 4:20

Got it Well, welcome everybody. Yeah, oh, I know You're going to say, hey, coach, this is supposed to be a show where you talk about other shows and I have no regrets, no ragged rats right now, because I blow my one ragged rat is. We did not, I did not click record early enough because this started out crazy and then stayed crazy, and I hope we're going to bring that energy into the show today. I'm your host, coach Castleton. With me, as always, is coach Bishop.

Speaker 2: 4:50

Is it possible to say you've derailed if you were never on the rails Like we started off the rails? Yeah.

Speaker 4: 4:57

It's very liberating. And then with us back from the wars is our boss, emily Chambers, who, I might add, you know, got us really scared with this side pain thing and coach was really concerned and I told her to have her boyfriend, you know, I said, hey, I'm just kicking the side, wicked had break up them, kidney stones there, guy. But it's just like, not, I'm going to, I'm going to, I'm going to go, and it's not great medical advice, that's a bust and but. But it turns out Emily is, is a okay and everyone can breathe a sigh of relief because she's back with us today and she is attributed it to just just a, just a little little fainting spell. You know, little little Victorian Misting, is that right, boss?

Speaker 3: 6:02

I think what it was is that my ovary was trying to punch an egg out. This is all fucking free. Menopause is the worst it will, especially for me, because I'm it's so close to the end, I can't wait. But like it's so far away still in, my periods are getting worse. Actually, wait real quick.

Speaker 3: 6:21

Speaking about the boyfriend, I was really annoyed yesterday at with some shit at work. I was like my fucking board boss. It's just a different mindset. But he likes to have like a lot of documentation, a lot of optimization and maximizing shit. He wants to have a record of what we did and when it was done and then we could compare it to the benchmarks. And this is what his level does, like this level of middle manager like does this shit? That's fine, I don't want to do any of that shit. I want to do none of it. I want to do my job and then that's it and then I'm finished. So I was complaining to the boyfriend about how annoying this was, because just let me sit with my spreadsheets and not talk to anybody. That's why I take this job, that's why I do it. And he said yeah, I've got an annoying guy at work too, that every week that we're getting paid, he makes sure to walk around to everybody. Hey, it's payday Friday. He's that guy Wow.

Speaker 3: 7:19

I was like yeah, I was like that sucks. I was like how do you handle that? And he was like every time he says it I shout spoilers at him.

Speaker 4: 7:29

That's funny, that's funny.

Speaker 3: 7:31

I was like oh, that's what millennials do. Boomers do this shit. Millennials, fucking troll. Millennials are like I'm not going to acknowledge. Spoilers oh my.

Speaker 4: 7:41

God Jesus, Holy shit, dude. Is that guy named Mark? Maybe Mark's and Weiner's? What's your thesis on this boss?

Speaker 3: 7:57

Mark's and Weiner's is my thesis. I'm sorry to anybody out there named Mark, you're probably lovely. There have to be some good ones.

Speaker 4: 8:05

Boss is in search of a good mark. But she has this thing where the funny part of this is one of the things that came up before the show All Mark's and Weiner's. And then Craig says to her wait, was your dad named Mark? Yes, he was.

Speaker 3: 8:17

I already think I got how do you think I figured that out? This is how I do this.

Speaker 2: 8:22

Wow, I stepped away for that part. They're so messed up, sweet buttercups. I just got hit right between the eyes with that, just like you in real time. Boy oh boy. This place takes some dark turns, man, some dark turns on this journey.

Speaker 3: 8:40

Yeah, obviously. And also I dated a guy in college named Mark. I'm trying to think of some others, but the guy that says hey, payday, Friday, pay week, his name is Mark. I'm sure that there are some horrible Emily's out there also.

Speaker 4: 8:57

I would totally high five that guy and then look back at my friends. I would make sure he said it every. I'd make sure that the payday Friday train kept on trucking. I'd be like woo thanks, mark. Yeah, you know what I mean Just to make my friends in the office. I would want their insights to seize up.

Speaker 3: 9:22

I don't understand why you would hate them like that. I will say that on a podcast that I listened to one time, somebody wrote in and said that their boss had somehow gotten confused about the meaning of this phrase and at work, when he was angry, when he wanted to express his displeasure at something which say, if that copier breaks again, I'm going to bust a nut, and the guy follows oh, I'm sorry, I'm like do you know what he wanted to know, how he could gently explain to his boss you're using that phrase wrong. And the host said oh, you tell him nothing because you're robbing somebody in the future of getting to experience their boss Exactly.

Speaker 3: 10:07

Yeah, mine do so you have okay, but having your boss inadvertently say I'm going to bust a nut in the middle of the office is so much better, yes, than saying pay week, hey, hey, hey. Payday Friday.

Speaker 4: 10:23

No, that's also amazing. Looks like somebody's got a page on the Monday's boss.

Speaker 3: 10:29

Oh, god damn it. I was in such a good mode for a second.

Speaker 4: 10:35

It's all gone, I wish we could work together nine to five boss. You'd have a long you'd be. So how long before I run you out of dodge? How long?

Speaker 3: 10:44

Oh, I don't work to nine to five. I mean, like technically I'm supposed to, actually I guess it's like eight to five, but I just I do it. When I do it, if I have to go into the office, I include my travel time. I'm like fuck you guys, you're fucking paying me. It wouldn't last that long.

Speaker 4: 11:04

I just had this image of me filling your office with balloons you know how they do that with people and then you not smiling and pulling out a taser and like frying the balloons to get to your desk silently and everyone just watching you going like is she? Yeah.

Speaker 3: 11:23

Jokes on you. I don't have an office. I've got a cubicle. Good luck keeping the balloons in those. So I don't. Cubicles are nice I mean like for like.

Speaker 4: 11:32

if you're talking about just like being happy, like a being happy kind of place, being in a cubicle, it really does. I've had more than my share of cubicles Coming up coming up on my way up the ladder and and yeah, it's a.

Speaker 2: 11:49

I was sharing before we got on here. I know folks are going to find this shocking, but I don't work out in jobs and and like sitting me in a cubicle like that's a war crime, like looking back now I'm like that is so fucking wrong, like it felt wrong even before I understood why it was so wrong, but like I would feel like I was going to lose my mind eventually. Like I like I remember that one job in particular. I liked the people. The work was easy enough. I was selling like SAT, tutoring, shit like that. Like who cares? It was fine. You call around mostly speak to a bunch of moms who were bored or about to head out to pick up their kids or whatever. Like they're fine. And I still was like I'm going to kill myself and or the rest of humanity if this doesn't stop. So it's always very interesting to be the people who can make it through that, because it it was horrible.

Speaker 4: 12:53

I don't know how you. I think it's like waterboarding cubicles.

Speaker 2: 12:58

It's like that level of like torture.

Speaker 4: 13:01

See, I don't mind cubicles as much as I'd like private. I'm like I'd rather you don't look at me, I'd rather you know whatever. What I don't like is my back, Like I'm the kind of person that if I go to a restaurant I sit with my back. I want to see like, like every day in my life is like a mafia hit, waiting to happen?

Speaker 2: 13:18

Yeah, 100%, and so definitely we'll adjust. If we go into a restaurant and she's led to the seat that's facing the door, she will like, with no words said, my kids too, will adjust the seating arrangement so that I can be in my proper position. Yeah, watching the door so I can see my killer's approach.

Speaker 4: 13:38

But when you have children that have the same malady, then you end up in Chuck E Cheese with six of you on one side of the same Like cleaning your weapons. But the kids will be like dad, come on, can I get one meal where I'm not fully exposed? I'm like, well, fine, that's fine, I'll sit up. You guys got to call it out. You see, anything you got to call it out.

Speaker 2: 14:05

That's funny because that's when I will relax and sit with my back Certain people who, I believe, have that gene I will sit with my back. If I went to eat with boss, I would sit with my back to the door with such comfort, with such peace in my soul, because I would know that before I even would have reacted, that they would already be dead and we'd be making a call to the blood guy. So I just like oh, yes. Yeah, that would be no problem, no problem.

Speaker 3: 14:36

I love so much that you believe that because I was just going to say she would serve you off boy she would serve. No, I wouldn't serve you up. She's the one that hired the person I'm not paying for. That that's frigging ridiculous. I love it. That's the issue. It's just fiscally irresponsible.

Speaker 4: 14:54

What are we talking about now.

Speaker 3: 14:57

No listen for those of you outside of the US, it is currently tax time. Our system is so fucked up we are legally sorry. Tax preparers are legally required to offer one service, one free service, to anyone who is filing the simplest of simple tax forms, which in our case is just the 1040. If you do that, they're not going to charge you anything. If you have a health savings account, which is supposed to be a fix to our incredibly horrible medical insurance system, where you get to use pre-tax dollars for your medical things, then you have to file a second form. Then H&R Block tries to charge you $60. Now my actual plan is that I'm going to walk to the library and pick up a paper copy of a tax return and fill that out and put it into the mail and send that to the government, because I would rather do that.

Speaker 3: 15:58

I would rather get pregnant and birth a child and then hand that child over to H&R Block before I will give them 60 of my dollars to file this shit. It's so fucking wild to me that I need to pay money for that. So no, I wouldn't hire somebody to kill you, I'd kill you myself. But the larger point is that I have such a wild disregard. Thank you, thanks. I appreciate that I have a wild disregard for my own personal health and safety, that it's never occurred to me in my life that somebody wants to kill me. I've never been on the outlet for that.

Speaker 4: 16:37

Oh, that's so funny. I thought you were going to say I have such a wild disregard that it's crazy to me that you would put your life in my hands because I'm not paying attention to that Again.

Speaker 3: 16:47

I leave my back door open when I go to the store, Please stop saying that I don't think. I'm allowed to talk like that at work. I leave the back door ajar.

Speaker 2: 17:00

Better? I'm pretty sure it's not, but I'll let him answer for himself.

Speaker 4: 17:05

All right. Well, today, everybody we are Aren't you so glad I came back we are yeah, with a vengeance, with a vengeance.

Speaker 4: 17:16

Like the sun shining over the cemetery. Are you caught up, boss? Have you caught up? Yes, okay, so we are going to talk about Wayne, episode seven. This is part two. The episode is entitled Chapter Seven. It'll last forever. Coach and I brazenly got through 20 minutes to zero of the 32-minute episode, so today is going to be a relatively quick one, boss. Overall feelings about the episode. How long ago did you see it?

Speaker 3: 17:56

I watched it over the weekend and then rewatched it just this morning, so it's a little bit fresh. It's a good episode. I like it. I mean we haven't had a bad episode yet. I'm a little bit angry, though, that if you got to the 20-minute mark, you already talked about what's the space? Who knocked out the girl?

Speaker 4: 18:14

Brendan Bradley, bradley, yeah, no, bradley, yeah, no, no Bradley. He's still with us in this scene. Oh right, so you're catching us right at the middle end of the Bradley part of the show. Please talk to us about Bradley.

Speaker 3: 18:31

I think Bradley sucks but also I love him as a character. I wouldn't want to know him in real life, but on the show he brings a little something Bradley's handsome, oh my God, I think he's got the most beautiful eyes.

Speaker 4: 18:47

I'm telling you, I'm like that guy is so good. He just looks like an all-American, corn-fed, middle-american farm boy, not necessarily this one I don't care for any of that. Yeah, yeah, right. Well, that's why, before we started, everybody we talked about a coach that was talking with a friend who says oh, she doesn't need no worry to meet a nice guy. And Boss said why do you want to meet a nice guy? For what? As a mark.

Speaker 2: 19:16

That's so funny as a mark. That was when I took off my headphones and went and took care of what I had to do, because I was just like I just need a moment with that, because that's the only possible reason you would look for a nice person as a mark. That was so funny.

Speaker 3: 19:34

I've got a list of things that I look for in men and a nice voice.

Speaker 4: 19:41

Stabilization, stability, a patina of two days of sweat unwashed. I want that appearance.

Speaker 3: 19:54

I want him to be smart and I want him to be funny, and then I want him to be hot in a weird way that I enjoy, and then basically anything after that. That's it. That's all I care about.

Speaker 2: 20:05

I'm with it. I'm going to toss out the nice guy thing. I actually, because I do such things, found myself googling the etymology of nice guy's fitness last. It's not etymology, I guess, if it's a phrase, but anyway the history of it, and it was said by a football coach, whatever and I used to fight against that phrase, like in my spirit. I just hated that phrase of nice guy's finish last, and probably in the way it was originally intended, I would still fight it.

Speaker 2: 20:45

But I've been looking at my own life. I'm actually serious about this. I've been looking at my own life and going, yeah, a little too much nice sometimes. Now, sometimes not enough. I will acknowledge that. So nobody needs to come out in me for the things I've done in life, because, yeah, there are a few of them. But times when I'm like people a lot of people, please, and I like someone will say something off kilter, I've been watching myself do it recently and you're going to have to figure out how to check people more gently so that you don't feel like, ooh, I hate to have to take this person's head off. So I'm going to let it go, because it also shouldn't go unchecked. But yeah, so the nice guy's finish. Last thing I'm starting to come around to difference between nice and kind and too much nice. That is why you finish last, because you're ignoring yourself for whatever reason, and then you end up losing out. Nice and kind aren't the same thing.

Speaker 3: 21:49

Yep, and I would argue even further that there's a lot of times where people think that they are because they are nice. Others shouldn't expect too much more of them, Like, oh, we'll give them a break. He's a nice guy, I'm like well, I don't want to give them a break. What I want him to do is be better at this. And if he can't be better at this, then he needs to figure something else out. And we're saying he, but this applies to all people Like yes, being kind is good, of course.

Speaker 4: 22:17

Yeah, not all.

Speaker 3: 22:19

But if you are using nice as a crutch, you're not going to do that well because nobody's actually going to respond well to that. We don't want to have to treat you differently because you are nice. We want you to deserve the way that we treat you because you are kind.

Speaker 2: 22:35

I'm going to toss this in and then coach can tell us why he hates everything we've said for the last five minutes. Yep absolutely.

Speaker 2: 22:41

But I'm going to throw this in One of the things in my coaching maybe think about it too is, in my coaching, what I say to people is we don't do positive, negative in sort of the classic way. So like somebody who would be like, oh, yelling at someone is a negative way to communicate, like no, no, no. In the context of the coaching, positive is moving you toward the point, which is essentially how we define where you want to go, and negative is moving you away from the point, and that's it. That's the whole definition of positive and negative. And so they've been sometimes where I've been nice and ways that were ultimately negative is what I'm saying.

Speaker 3: 23:24

Oh, I absolutely agree with that, but I am also waiting for Castleton 20.

Speaker 2: 23:27

Oh yeah, he's coming in guns. Oh no, no, no, here's the thing.

Speaker 4: 23:33

I just feel like we've been recording for a few years together. Now it's been, you know, it's had its moments, but mostly it's trash. And I will say that you should know better than to just just welcome boss back with open arms with that particular statement, because it leads her down this. She feels justified, she feels like I'm winning over one of the two fake nice guys on this podcast I know nobody's actually nice and so it's a matter of just accepting your, your primal nature and stop pretending to be nice. It gives her an entree to poke fun of my, my dear friend and movie star legend, matt Damon. It just opens up every Matt Damon talking point, and I don't like when she's happy.

Speaker 2: 24:36

I don't like when she's happy, that's nice guys often do.

Speaker 3: 24:42

They get upset when other people experience. Yeah, that's it, that's it, that's great. You've really.

Speaker 4: 24:48

You've, really, you've really opened me up to a whole other side of myself. Boss, yeah, listen, I know what you're saying. You don't want to. This is a.

Speaker 4: 24:59

I look at it differently, I do. I remember thinking I have a friend and we always talk about how we're not provocable. That's the word we use, and that's because we don't do the correction thing when we probably should. But again, a huge part of it, now that we've started this podcast and been doing it for a long time, a huge part of it is privilege. First of all, I have the privilege of not reacting, which I never saw as privileged before, but it really is. It's like oh, I have the option. You know, some people just plain don't have the option. I have the option. So that's a big part of it.

Speaker 4: 25:36

The second thing is the me not wanting to make it us out of it, and then the because I just I don't want to be associated with anybody that's going to be like that. And then the third thing is I don't. I think I don't like I know, I know you're saying, I know it's funny because I understand completely. A boss is saying and you're right, there is a huge difference between nice and kind coach. That's a. It's a big. They talk about this when they talk about people from the East Coast or people from the West Coast.

Speaker 4: 26:05

Remember watching this nice but not kind, which is the West Coast, and East Coast is kind but not nice. Obviously you know huge rationalization, but but yeah, no, no, I it bears there, it has merit. I will say definitely that you have to be able to stand your ground in certain, in certain places, in certain times. It's going to look very different, for how that manifests itself in your individual personality is going to look wildly different. So my sense is how boss would show that in her personality, how it would present to an outsider would be very different than how it might present for you or me, coach, because we're generally probably going to sand off the corners of that response to a large degree. Just, boss doesn't care about that. She, she's glad if you get scratched on one of the corners.

Speaker 3: 27:04

If it's called for.

Speaker 4: 27:05

Yeah, if it's called for. No. No, I mean, listen, there's.

Speaker 2: 27:09

Yeah, there's a lot to that, no you know we joke, but I actually do feel like in that way, jokes aside, boss, has impacted me because that ability to just be plain I feel like I've had over the years. I have like I will rip your head off or I will put up with an unbelievable level of bullshit, like where even other people in my life are like what the fuck man? Like, how long are you gonna take this? So I appreciate about seriously, boss, and some of the things that she's like even shared or advised or seen in the shows that it's like a thing happened. This is my response to that thing. My response may bother you, my response may elate you, who knows? But this is my response and you do what you need to do. But that's my response and I do appreciate. Yeah, I've spent a lot of time in my life. How's this gonna land? Oh, they're gonna think this. So I don't want them to feel that it's like, no, that's my business anyway. I can't control it anyway.

Speaker 4: 28:32

Yeah, but coach, that is, in the last three years, you've had like a quantum change. First of all, you understood. You had ADHD, which changed everything.

Speaker 4: 28:40

Everything, like literally every single thing, about my life, you still yeah, yeah, no, and that allowed you to contemplate and change and question. But if we step back and we say, look, let's take anybody, it doesn't matter about the three of us, but you take, you step back in your life and you say, okay, what is your view of humanity, what is your view of your time on this planet? Okay, my guess is boss would say something along the lines of like, she's more of a realist, right? So she marches to the real. She is not an idealist. She says this is what it is. It's a pit of, it's a mosh pit full of animals, and I am an animal in the mosh pit. I have no problem labeling myself in the way that doesn't elevate me. Like I'm just telling you I'm right here, I'm trying to do the best I can, but like I'm not pulling string, I'm not a puppet master above the mosh pit.

Speaker 4: 29:31

Coach, you and I would probably say, okay, yes, we would agree with all that, except we are marching to the ideal. We would like to go to the stairs and step up out of the mosh pit, and so we hold ourselves to the standard at the top of the stairs and Boston's. That's probably an absolute waste of time. It totally disregards reality and is unattainable, considering there are no stairs. So it's how you all, when you step back and you look at these things, you can put them in perspective, not? I will also add the fact that at a certain point in life, your kids are mostly grown. Coach, you hit 50, the amount of fucks that you have left to give about like worrying about other people.

Speaker 4: 30:20

It really does, just it's dwindling. Yeah, yeah, yeah it really does take a huge nosedive. But, like when we talk about those, we know we have a lot of people that listen who have ADHD and we thank you. We hope we jump around top is enough to keep that dope mean crackle acting. But one thing I'll say is the other day I was thinking about when I was when I was a little kid and I don't know as I started dating and stuff and I was like, yeah, I started dating pretty young, like I think, younger than the curve.

Speaker 4: 30:56

At the time I was like the first of my friends to get girlfriends and I was like had a bunch of my dorky, we were dork, we were nerds, so that was my. That's how I identified as a nerd. And so if I kissed a girl, my friends would huddle around and be like, oh my God, like what? So I was how do you? You know what I mean.

Speaker 4: 31:17

It was like like I was unlocking mysteries in the universe and I was telling coach that I had this realization that I, you know, in my early teens I cheated on a lot of people, a lot of girlfriends, and it made me sick to my stomach and it always made me sick in real time and I never realized until like last Wednesday I was like holy fuck, that was ADHD. Like I would feel compelled and it was so nice to talk to coach about it because, first of all, there was no judgment. I'm sorry for anybody that hears this and doesn't have ADHD and goes no, you're just a shithead. That's what boss is making a face of right now, but it really was like you'd be in a moment and you'd be, and you would be like I don't know, it'd be like you would just be.

Speaker 4: 32:06

It felt like you were compelled. It was so awful and I was like this is not who I am. I hate that I do this. Why the fuck do I do this? I was so mad at myself every time Because I'm like like loyalty is a huge tenet of my personality, always has been and I go, what am I like? And coach was saying that he had a different situation, but his experience was I'm so tired of hurting people, mine was. I'm so sorry to saying sorry because I didn't like to feel like I had been the wrong. I was the wronging party, I was the one that had made the error and I was like I'm so fucking sick of saying sorry because I have to, because I'm the one that did it. Like if I just stopped doing it, I wouldn't have to fucking say sorry, because I hated that position, knowing I had fucked up.

Speaker 4: 32:51

I didn't like it and it completely did not compute with me. First of all, I didn't know I had ADHD until I was diagnosed with 44, coach, how old were you when you got diagnosed? 48. Yeah, 48. But I look back and I'm like, oh my God, like it's like this. It was a dopamine search and I was fighting against myself, didn't have the tools to combat it, had no one in my life who could make any sense of it whatsoever, and so you just imbued with shame and misery and self-loathing and you start to build this picture of yourself as no, I'm a cheater. Like I am a cheater, like that's who I am. I'm not a good person. I am not. I lie to myself. I have a belief system that is not congruent with what my actions are, and it is horrible and I don't know why. I ported my brain back to that age and it got better as I got older, but it was still like it was always there. It was always like I've had a hard time fighting temptation, a hard time always making the right choice.

Speaker 2: 33:56

Impulse control. Yeah, impulse control. Wanting novel experiences, I mean it's just, it's set up, it's just, especially if you don't know that you're like needing the lookout for that.

Speaker 4: 34:07

Yeah, and coach was like when we were talking about it it was like two friends whispering, but I really wanted to own it. I really wanted to talk about it on the podcast because if there's anybody out there that had a similar experience, I just didn't want you to feel like it was just you, because it felt horrible to me. To this day, I feel terrible about it and I'm not the. I know that there's that thing where you get good at forgiving yourself and whatever, and I'm still not. I'm just playing, not great at that. But if anybody else had a similar experience or never, I don't know why it took me so long to put it. It should be obvious.

Speaker 4: 34:47

But I guess you just you get diagnosed and then you start to think like, okay, how can I address this? Because one of the things about ADHD is now versus not now. And so you're like, okay, well, now you know, let's deal with it now. There's a big issue. Like I better deal with it now. And then you start to go back and think about some of the things that affected you in your formative years and you start to see like this invisible, it's like a mage hand of ADHD just gently nudging you toward decisions that if you didn't have that particular diagnosis, you may not have gone that direction.

Speaker 3: 35:28

So number one. Thank you, coach, for saying that I made any impact. Excuse me, sorry. You're understanding anybody's understanding. Hey Castleton, you too, man, if I impacted you at all. That's wild to me, because I'm still of the opinion that, not that people don't notice me, but like sometimes I'll run into somebody, like a friend of a friend that I've met once or twice before at a party or something, and I'm like, oh hey.

Speaker 1: 35:54

I'm Emily and they're like yeah, I know you, I've met you before.

Speaker 3: 35:57

And I'm like I didn't realize you would remember me I would have acted differently before. Okay, so that's first Number one. That actually means a lot. Thank you, I think the only thing, not that you were wrong about the pit with the animals, but only that what I would say is I don't think it's bad that people are animals in a pit, like I think, especially relating it to what you just said about cheating and ADHD and what I would say is that people self report that infidelity has affected or existed within roughly half of marriages, and maybe that's the same for relationships and maybe that's, you know, whatever else, if it is impacting half of the population.

Speaker 3: 36:48

Should we say that this is something so wildly unforgivable that you should hate yourself and feel like you are a terrible person for it? Or should we redefine the parameters where it says, if you're married for 40 years and you fuck up once or twice, like? Should we have a different way of dealing with the fact that as animals, even though we're human beings, as animals we will have these impulses and we might make these mistakes. And how do we recover from making those mistakes and how do we keep our identity, saying I do love you, I do care about you. I am trying to take care of you, but also I fucked up in this way.

Speaker 2: 37:26

This isn't a direct response to that, but you sparked this for me. I knew you know to have conversations about relationships, blah, blah, blah. And this woman shared with me that she actually told her husband, essentially with what was going on in their lives. Look the way shit is. I'm gonna cheat, like if we don't sort out what the fuck's happening right now, and I thought that was such a brave thing to do and I think it speaks to somewhat just saying around shame because not being able to address, like in that case it's in different cases, I mean 50% of relationships. I mean we talk up pretty big numbers here, right, so there's a lot of things going on, but I think sometimes what's going on is some version of there's some experience I'm looking to have that I'm not having. Who knows that could be, depending on the person, any number of things and our inability or our lack of skill, frankly, in being able to recognize our needs and articulate our needs and be vulnerable enough to share our needs. It's so across the board low that I think then the acting out does become a piece of it.

Speaker 2: 38:51

I'll connect this quickly because I brought it up with somebody else and I've been thinking about it a lot in terms of our Ted Lasso conversations, michelle and Dr J, and the more I've thought about it, because when Ted talks to her about it, she hangs up and then she smiles.

Speaker 2: 39:15

I think Michelle was like I have known this man, I have fallen in love with this man, I have had this man's child and I don't actually know at any given moment what actual emotion he's really experiencing, because he's gonna talk about Rosa Parks in a fucking donut, and so I think it was like what rule could I break? What fucking thing could I do that would get you to say it's not all good, it ain't all sunshine and rainbows. There's no pithy rhyming with a famous name that you're gonna do to fix it. Like that we're gonna deal with some real shit. And so, yeah, I think our ability, I think that 50% number would come way down. I don't think it would go to zero, cause I think there are a lot of things going on, but I think it would come way down if we were just better at that.

Speaker 3: 40:21

Oh yeah, yeah, I never wanna absolutely agree with that. Number two I think that you might find people like Rupert who seem to be serial cheaters, or other famous rich men who are serial cheaters. If we had a different understanding of what the requirement in a relationship is. And this isn't gonna be across the board. It's not gonna say, well, you get married and then you never look at it in person other than your spouse for the rest of your life, like it's not across the board standard. But you say this is what I need from the relationship and the other person says, okay, this is what I can do for you, this is what I could give to you.

Speaker 4: 41:01

So this is Rupert. I hear you, boss, rupert. I love that you made that connection, because him cheating is totally different from the type of cheating that I feel like with Rupert. If you had an open marriage and you said go ahead and do it it would take all of the joy out of it because the whole thing is the sort of back alley nature of it.

Speaker 2: 41:25

Well, I think yes and. I think it's a bit of. It's the same drive that got him to his billionaire status. I would say looking from the outside in, and this is total dinosaur psychology, so I would acknowledge that. But he seems to me, and the way the show plays out, it seems to me this is right. He's looking to fill a hole that you can't actually fill. Wow, and so how much money, how many women? Well, that matter very much. Go ahead boss. I set him up, you knock him down.

Speaker 3: 42:06

I don't even know where you're going with this one. No, that was it. Just you try hard enough, you can fill it.

Speaker 2: 42:12

No, we can fill it, fill in the hole, got it, but yeah, but I just, I think, you know. So he becomes a human hoarder, right, like he becomes like a, because truly, at a certain point, I mean he's not a young man, so like how many 23 year old models Like even my favorite meal. I don't want to eat it all day, every day, for the rest of my fuck life. I mean, like how, you know what I mean and so I think, yeah, I think that. But even that piece like how broken we're, how broken is he as we see over time, Well, and I think that that's a huge thing.

Speaker 3: 42:57

I know for a fact that in my early in my late teenage, early 20 years I put all of my mental unwellness. The entire focus was getting a boyfriend. If I got a boyfriend, then I could prove somebody likes me so much that I was a good enough person that this and this and this and this, and then all of my other problems would go away. And then I got a boyfriend. I didn't like him very much and none of my problems went away and I was like well, this isn't actually fixing it.

Speaker 3: 43:28

So, I think that there's so many issues that go into this that we think you get married, you have a kid, and then your life is what it's supposed to be. Or you get married and now you're not gonna have any trouble not cheating because you're gonna love that so much. It's automatically gonna solve this. We pretend that marriage is the same as mental health all the fucking time.

Speaker 2: 43:51

Right, because it's not. Oh my gosh, the perceived stability, the perceived stability, it's perceived stability, yes.

Speaker 4: 43:55

You know how many people nodded along with you when you said that. So why is that? Why are we conditioned to seek extrinsic validation? And so it's like oh, if I just get this boy like and the point, this is where the health economy comes in. It's just that nobody told us this, unless your parents model it for you, and unless you have an example. I remember when I filed for divorce from my first wife, I remember thinking I cannot model this for my children. I don't want this to be their model. I know it can be better and I can't have this be their only relationship that they aspire to, because it's not healthy.

Speaker 4: 44:43

And when you step back and you say you know, for people who've been listening to us for years you know how much I harp on the concept of shared agreements and marriage is a beautiful thing when it works. It's less beautiful when it doesn't. I would step back and say if we take the any of the sort of codifying of marriage out of it let's say we take away the you know signing agreements and the fiscal bonding of entities, and we take away the religious, any sort of approval by religion, it ultimately ends up being a partnership and we're unrealistic that partnerships that you start in your 20s can last your 70s without understanding every single aspect of what that entails. And we do a I mean a remarkably lousy job of preparing people for that. And I talk all the time about how people get really excited for a wedding and not they have no concept about the marriage that comes after. So we as a society, we as a civilization, have to take a long, hard look at this.

Speaker 4: 45:56

If there are, I didn't know that half of the things were cheated or there was some infidelity, but it's also in the language, like I just said, infidelity, and it's like why is that, you know? Why is fidelity then the goal? And why is like, why are people having relationships where a shared agreement is not you know, some other form of, like corporal satisfaction? You know, because you get people all the time who are in love, they love each other. They get no marriage. They find out their libidos don't match.

Speaker 4: 46:29

Now what are you gonna do? Like there are these threads that I've stumbled across where I go. Oh my God, like this is like it's a whole thread about somebody who's deeply, deeply in love and they just cannot get there. You know, it's both, it's men and women, it's gay and straight, it doesn't matter, it's just like this person is the core of my life and yet when we first got together, we would have sex all the time. And now, you know, it's tapered off and no matter what I do, I can't seem to reignite the spark and people are suffering over it.

Speaker 4: 47:05

And is it any wonder, when these things aren't sort of addressed upfront, that it can lead to, you know, tribulations in a relationship? It's not. We don't do a good job of preparing for that and, like I said, the language is instructive. It's funny. I picked up my 14 year old. He just turned 14. The other day picked him up the day after his birthday and he was driving home and he said how many words can you name for someone who's not religious, so, but also like someone, a religious, somebody like that would be sort of branded by? Maybe you know, historically branded and less so today, but how many words in the language?

Speaker 3: 48:01

I mean it depends on what exactly you're going for. You could do straight atheist or agnostic. There's also a heretic.

Speaker 4: 48:08

Yep keep going.

Speaker 3: 48:10

Oh God, I mean, you're gonna ask me about this.

Speaker 4: 48:12

I'm saying pagan, non-believer.

Speaker 3: 48:15

Well, a non-believer, I would say, I would actually argue against pagan. I would say that pagan is a religion. It's just not a religion that we believe in anymore or that we don't necessarily accept.

Speaker 4: 48:25

Absolutely yes, but I'm saying in colloquial terms, there are what? Eight or 10 terms for someone? Yeah right, like a heathen, apostate. There's all these different terms that are pretty widely used, even if they're used improperly. Is what I'm saying. You might say, okay, here's the actual etymological root of pagan. And I might say, well, you know, my neighbor used it the wrong way yesterday. But he right so I'm saying it's in the language. And then he said to me how many words are there in the English language for the day after tomorrow?

Speaker 3: 49:03

Yeah, no, it's tomorrow.

Speaker 4: 49:05

The day after tomorrow. Does that have a name? The day after tomorrow?

Speaker 3: 49:08

Yeah, no, not tomorrow, two days from now.

Speaker 4: 49:10

Two days from now, but it's not.

Speaker 3: 49:13

That's how the boyfriend refers to the Dennis Quay film. The day after tomorrow, oh, you know, two days from now.

Speaker 4: 49:22

I thought anyway, I thought it was instructive because I thought, wow, that is funny. You just inherently we are so bridled with the language that it will say, okay if you're not in this one group. And again, this is nothing against religious people, this is not. This is not a tack on people who are religious. I've said many, many times. This is not. People have lost the nuance with regard to that.

Speaker 4: 49:50

I happen to not be, but I really love spirituality and I love how people find wherever they find it. It's fine by me, as long as it doesn't negatively impact somebody else, like most of the rules that I try to adhere to. So, yeah, anyway, I just think it's just an interesting thing where language affects that. And then we have lots of words for cheaters and you don't have a single word for adult unmarried boyfriend and girlfriend. Like Julianne and I have been together for 16 years 15 years, something, you know a long ass time and right, and there's no word for we say partner. Usually you say partner. People think gay, so it's just a weird. You know less so now because, like there's more of us out there, so now you can sort of say partner and they whatever.

Speaker 3: 50:43

But there's no automatic word for it. There's still no good word for your partner's parents or family.

Speaker 4: 50:52

Oh yeah, that isn't in-law.

Speaker 3: 50:53

Yeah, right, right, yeah yeah yeah, Other than in-law, you're not getting. You're not getting a partner in law. That's not a thing that people generally say.

Speaker 4: 51:03

Because it's technically not in-law.

Speaker 3: 51:04

My mother my mother in partner, like it doesn't make any fucking sense. You can't figure out a word for that. I think that's a really good point. I think I was just this past week and discussing how and I'm pretty sure I've mentioned another podcast before but the idea that when a woman is interested in a man who might not be standardly physically attractive but is smart and ambitious and successful, we would label her a gold digger yes, If that man, who is maybe not conventionally attractive but has a lot of money, marries a much hotter, often younger, wife, we refer to him as nothing.

Speaker 3: 51:46

We still call her the trophy wife. In both cases, regardless of who we are considered to have done something good or bad, the label is applied to the woman and the way that that negatively impacts our perception of her. Theoretically, donald Trump is the asshole because he could only get a much younger, hotter wife because he has so much money. Even if you don't think well of him, she is the one with the label. I think that there are so many things that are built into marriage that are still connected to treating women like property considering a woman to be something that two men agree to exchange in order to end some war in France or England, or some bullshit that we don't have a good idea about the way we're supposed to treat spouses within the relationship that we've only within maybe my generation decided that partners are actually supposed to be equal. In some sense, that's the way, like there's a lot of shit.

Speaker 2: 52:43

I know when was that vote taken I didn't get that memo.

Speaker 3: 52:47

I know, I don't know if your wives have informed you yet, but you guys should be treated equally. Now I don't know if they're doing it, but they should be treating you better.

Speaker 2: 53:00

Should be treated equally. Yeah, okay, yeah.

Speaker 3: 53:05

Don't tell her who told you that.

Speaker 2: 53:07

Do not bring my name into it.

Speaker 3: 53:09

I cannot blow up their spots, but just that I on threads the other day re-threaded I don't know the terminology there either but that we societally raised one generation of women to feel empowered and didn't raise the same generation of men to deal with empowered women. So we were at a fucking point.

Speaker 4: 53:35

We talked about that on this podcast. We talked about that exact point Really. Men are lagging, lagging way way behind, Even in role models. I posted that the YouTube video talks about how there's no total absence of male role models on television.

Speaker 4: 53:54

I got Bandit Healer right behind me. You can see that right there. It's the best dad I know on television and he's a cartoon dog, australian cartoon dog man. We're just killing it. We're killing it as a culture. But yes, these are all amazing points. If any of these things have resonated with you, if it's something that you've been contending with, we hope that you will think about joining the Butter Cups and coming and chatting with us on the community site. Let's roll into the last 10 minutes or so of Wayne, episode 7. When we left last time, coach, if you remember, we were at a scene where Del comes out and she basically was like we got to go get some booze. Bradley, as we mentioned, is one of those people that's like whatever, the last thing he hears is the best idea. He's like yes, absolutely, we got to do that.

Speaker 1: 55:08

Maybe we should get some cocaine and we should get some. Whatever, he's just totally, he's total mess.

Speaker 4: 55:15

But Del has a point and her thing is, boss. This is what we left off. I don't know if you I don't think you've listened to the last episode yet but when Del was in there no matter how much everybody else hears Bobby Luchetti screaming and yelling and carrying on being psycho she heard pain, she heard actual suffering. He was hurting and it's something that she this goes back to you. We quoted you several times. The whole thing on the episode was a lot of love for you. It was just a real lot of compliments directed towards you, boss, and one of the things we said was when you talked about I don't remember if it was Rosie O'Donnell, it was some comedian who saw somebody be drunk and they're like no, no, that's a good drunk, you don't have to worry about that.

Speaker 3: 56:06

Yeah Right, rosie O'Donnell and Danny DeVito.

Speaker 4: 56:08

Is that what it was? Okay, it was Rosie O'Donnell. Okay, and I said that like. So if you're, if you are, conditioned to deal with people who are under the influence, you can hear things that other people are not going to hear. And so we brought that up and we said, okay, dell feels like she's got to do something for her dad. Can we hurry the fuck up please? And she turns around and Bradley says do not get her pregnant. Now we are. We're in the parking lot, we were mixing drinks and we did this beginning of this last time, and right where we finished was Bradley takes a sip of the Cape Cod. Cooley, this is we're trying to figure out what was in this thing. It looks gnarly. He takes a sip and he goes oh God, that's rude and then he drinks more.

Speaker 2: 57:13

So that was a time in life. We got into that a little bit last time, but like there's a time in your life when that's the reflex, I would have thrown that bottle. So far, yeah what, I don't have to put up with this. Like I feel a little bit sick watching him drink it. Yeah.

Speaker 3: 57:31

So definitely now that I'm an adult. Oh my God, I I got a six pack of beer a couple weeks ago. Sometimes I like to have an adult beverage after dinner.

Speaker 1: 57:45

I'm an adult, I could do that and I realized it was.

Speaker 3: 57:48

It was not a bad batch, but there was something weird about it that made it explode. It had been in my fridge for days and I would open one can and it would still overflow and I was like I'm not drinking this anymore, like whatever's happening with this, I don't, I don't like it. And then I just threw all of the beer away and there was like the 16 year old and me would have been like what the fuck are you doing? You made me drink Skoll vodka. You know somebody who purchased Asko brand tequila and you're throwing away per yeah yeah, you're throwing away perfectly decent beer just because it has too much head.

Speaker 3: 58:25

You're, but no.

Speaker 4: 58:26

I'm an adult.

Speaker 3: 58:26

now I don't have to do that.

Speaker 4: 58:28

Coach, I need too much head joke. I really was.

Speaker 3: 58:32

It's not a joke, because it's impossible. There's no such thing. Yeah, no such thing.

Speaker 2: 58:37

You know what boss took care of it. I'm going to go back on mute she does for most things.

Speaker 4: 58:44

So Dell Dell says she's heading in and of course, wayne has now had a change of heart we talked about you know. Listen, wayne's learning curve is pretty damn good. He learns from his mistakes. He had made the mistake earlier in the episode. He's not going to make the same mistake again. I do really really like it is. It is a borderline superpower, considering what an Encino man he is and how little like any modeling he has in his life, that he picks up on this so quickly. Go ahead, coach.

Speaker 2: 59:16

But, I think, in an interesting way. The Encino man comic made me laugh, but it also, I think, speaks to why he can, and it's the comment that came up earlier about not having prepared a generation of men. He has intentionally removed himself from what I'll describe, for simplicity, as the mainstream, so he hasn't taken in a lot of that shit. He sees justice and he sees injustice, he sees right and wrong, but he's not like oh, I'm a dude, I'm not going to follow some girl into the hospital. You know what I mean? Like he. He he's just like what's the right thing to do? Oh shit, I just learned that the right thing to do is to be supportive here, even if it's going to suck for me. Yeah, you know, like we'd, we'd almost in some cases. I guess what I'm saying is we'd almost be better off if we had raised some boys in the wild than to have taught them all the shit we've taught them to this point and now to try to have them unlearn that so that they can be the things we're talking about.

Speaker 3: 1:00:25

Yeah, I don't know if I think that he is uncivilized, so much as I think that he has surprisingly little ego and not ego in terms of self confidence. These two things are different yeah.

Speaker 3: 1:00:40

The self confidence is I do this thing well and I feel pretty good about it, and ego is if somebody says something mean or bad about me, I must be a terrible person. I can't stand that. So I think that what he has is a great ability to say I fucked up, I shouldn't have, I'm going to fix it in the future. But you get all these people all the time that said, oh, I did this thing. But the fucking. I don't know if I can't remember if we've talked about this, but the Willie's chocolate experience in Scotland.

Speaker 2: 1:01:11

You did, we did talk about it. Yes, yes, yes, they were fresh. Yeah, go back.

Speaker 3: 1:01:17

Some guy used AI generated descriptions.

Speaker 4: 1:01:21

Oh yeah.

Speaker 3: 1:01:22

Yeah, there's going to be an immersive not Willy Wonka, but Willy Wonka experience in some warehouse. And then it was a fucking joke. It was terrible. And he did an interview and he was like I've lost all my friends. My partner left me. I didn't mean to. This isn't who I am as a person and I'm like no, you are saying that people telling you that you did something wrong is an indication of who you are as a person. What we're saying is you did something wrong. You need to separate those two things. You fucked up. I'm not saying you deserve to go to hell, I'm saying you fucked this up, except that and then move on from it. And I think that Wayne actually has a great ability to do that. Like I fucked something up, I am not a fuck up. He knows the difference there and he knows how to spot.

Speaker 2: 1:02:06

I think there's a distance that you're describing to between fixed and growth mindsets. I'm for real about that. Yes, one of the most powerful sermons, personally, I ever heard, this woman who was in Divinity School shared with us that the translation when people say that God said I am which okay, quickly, that's in the scripture, so okay that the actual translation is more like I am becoming what I am becoming. So, even if you believe this literally or not, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I think that would completely change, like almost everything about my church upbringing, that it's an evolving thing.

Speaker 2: 1:02:54

And so I think sometimes when people say what boss just highlighted, which is like I'm not that kind of person, they're almost treating the self as like this fixed thing. And then, whereas I think what Wayne is saying is the person I wish to be had really dealt with this particular piece, but the person I wish to be would go into the hospital with you, I'm realizing. So now I'm going to go into the hospital with you. It's not fixed. He's like he is learning as he goes and he's moving toward in any moment who he wants to be as Wayne. I think we'd be a lot better off in a number of ways if we, if we could see ourselves that way, because it always makes me go oh, I'm a racist born in my body. I'm like, listen, I got racism in my views. How the fuck, do you not? How could you live here?

Speaker 2: 1:03:50

Like I mean it's like saying you have no water, no oxygen, like you're surrounded by the shit, like this is impossible. I don't see color yeah exactly.

Speaker 4: 1:03:59

Exactly, you know sorry. So it must be tough for you, coach, with your, with your racist tendencies. I, some of us, are just really, really bad.

Speaker 2: 1:04:09

We're just people.

Speaker 4: 1:04:11

I saw a thing, or Elon Musk was like I don't want people to use racism as excuse. It's really boring, I don't want here. And I was like, oh my God, like I don't know that it wasn't deep fake, I didn't go into it, but it looked real and I was like you're not really saying that out loud. I was like, wow, because, because, on top of being insensitive and and like like chicken level ignorant you know what I mean you just go like, wow, your entitlement is so you don't want to be bothered, right Hearing everybody chirp about how this all the racist stuff that happened to them.

Speaker 2: 1:04:49

I don't know Time for that Civil rights error man. Oh my God.

Speaker 4: 1:04:54

I was like, wow, yeah, I. Anyway, I want to point out that Wayne's. The only role model Wayne has really ever had is his father, who had that code, a very black and white sort of thing, no nuance, no gray area and his. The only role model he has that's not his father and they've only alluded to it a little bit is Conan the barbarian who just handles shit with a sword. So it's not that much of a reach. Just who is, who is intentionally uncivilized, who embraces it as a character that embraces his lack of civility.

Speaker 4: 1:05:35

He thinks civilization is a joke and you know you handle things with your sword. So Wayne has has been conditioned to do that from the only two primary influences in his life. So to see him follow Dylan is great. He says I'm going to go with you. She says I don't want you to know. He says, del, no, I don't want to, I don't want you to catch a cold or some shit, because she's a tough. She's a tough cookie and she's been. She's clearly wounded, right.

Speaker 3: 1:06:04

And what does Wayne say here, boss, I don't like hospitals because of my dad. Yeah, Because when his dad got sick in the hospital he only got sicker and they told me he was never going to get better and nothing. They tried to meet him better, so I like that he was able to express to her I'm not unwilling to go in because I don't care about you. I am hesitant to go in because it is difficult for me, and I think that that's one of the things that men need to get much, much better at. Just in my own experience there's so many times.

Speaker 4: 1:06:43

Oh, just man, jesus Christ.

Speaker 3: 1:06:45

Yeah, no, a little bit just men.

Speaker 2: 1:06:48

That's the real sexism. I'm kidding we're going to go on.

Speaker 4: 1:06:52

That's the real sexism. Thank you everybody. Thank you for tuning in.

Speaker 3: 1:06:57

I will not pretend that women don't do it sometime, but it is the manner and your condition to do so. Patriarchy hurts men as much as it hurts women. It just prefers men. It's what I always like to say.

Speaker 3: 1:07:11

Thank God, there's actually a Buzzfeed article or something that I read late last night when I had insomnia. It was all these things about how men were saying it's about things that women don't know about men. And men were like I have been friends with somebody for 20 years I don't know their last name. I've been friends with this group of guys. We talk about what our favorite rankings of different dipping sauces are, and so they're going to all these things like men can just chat about nothing. We don't. There was a guy I knew. I didn't realize his name was Dave. His name was Dave.

Speaker 3: 1:07:47

Like all this shit I've got. One of my best friends is a guy I know at the gym. We've never seen each other outside at the gym. I'm like he's not your best friend, he's an acquaintance. So it was all these things about how impersonal their closest guy relationships are. And then after that they wrote about how we're lacking physical touch. People don't care about my emotional well being. If I post something on social media saying I'm having a rough week, nobody cares. And I'm like you have to see the connection between those two right, like you have to understand how those two things are related.

Speaker 4: 1:08:18

What Hmm?

Speaker 3: 1:08:24

Like if you pour all of your emotional connection and physical well being into one relationship. If that relationship fails, you are fucked. So you're going to need to like open yourselves up to some level of danger where you tell people how you're feeling and you tell people I don't like going to hospitals because it reminds me about how my dad died and that's why I failed to go in with you before, but now I'm going to because I'm going to address that.

Speaker 4: 1:08:52

This is why, when coach and I see each other after a long time, we just turn around and rub our butts up against each other. I was like what the fuck's he about to say? Luna, don't be really cool if we did, though.

Speaker 3: 1:09:08

Is that weird? I just rubbed my boobs. No, no, we're trying to disperse the physicality.

Speaker 4: 1:09:14

It can't all be Daphne, Sorry.

Speaker 2: 1:09:16

Daphne, that's right, you don't get all of him. So, totally hearing everything you just said, and I think there's like a how do I frame this? I think there's a combination of things that can happen that would be healthy. So there's a level of like. I've had women friends who like anytime we're going to connect, like I know we're going to talk about some shit eventually, like we're going to go on and we're going to get into something, and it might be something that's actually going on in either of our lives. It could be from we're going to get into some shit and we're going to dig in.

Speaker 2: 1:09:57

And I do have. I have male friends I can do that with, but who I also like coach and I can have a whole fucking an hour on fantasy football. But I think it's the it's when it's exclusively that and when the other would be a problem. And I've actually consciously now also have I tend not to have guys who are close to me at this point in my life who would be like so freaked out by, you know, human emotions, so I acknowledge that. But I am willing to make it awkward, like I am willing to be like love you man as we hang up and some of my guy friends respond and some pretend they didn't hear me and they hang up and I and it's fine.

Speaker 3: 1:10:44

And it's fine, thor, it's fine. He doesn't mind at all, it's fine, you know so there you go.

Speaker 4: 1:10:49

I get really grossed out because I just think it's like super sexual.

Speaker 3: 1:10:54

And he's just coming at you, coach.

Speaker 4: 1:10:59

And I'm like dude Jesus, it's got a full out, that's right, yeah.

Speaker 3: 1:11:05

No, I think that's a really good point actually, because I can't imagine how fucking exhausting it would be to have only significant, deep, like emotionally bearing conversations with every person in your life all the time. Right, like, I can talk with all of my friends about these things, but also sometimes I get really fucking drunk and dance to yeah, add a bad bar in sandwich Illinois with my friend Mandy, like sometimes you just fuck around. So yes, there should be a way to move through all those levels comfortably.

Speaker 2: 1:11:41

Now there's something it's a step aside, but in this scene that I think is worth calling out in the context of conversation we're having on gender, and it is that, like Bobby Dell Dell expresses being in pain with a brand of violence Right, you might catch a cold or some shit Like she's. That's definitely not just like emotionally balanced. I really didn't enjoy that. You didn't support me, right. Like it's. It's, you know, that's a hurling of a rock back over her shoulder. And and I bring it up because I also think that some of the conversation we're having about men and women is also making room for women to be whatever you want to call it, 360 or whatever human, in that she's not always going to have the perfectly emotionally balanced response and she's not always going to be able to do her work and his work too. Matter of fact, right now she's dealing with her dying father. She don't want to do no motherfucking work. You want to mix this Cape.

Speaker 2: 1:12:57

Todd coolly and deliver it inside, because this motherfucker alcoholic and he ain't going to calm down till you get his fucking drink, absolutely, you know. And so I think there's Daphne talks. I've thought about this, but recently Daphne has spoken to the fact that, like my, my children have a right to be mediocre like anybody else. Right, can we talk about like black excellence and all this stuff, and it's very exciting. But it's also, like Jesus, that's a lot of God day impressions, like I can't just everything you do. If you did, you got to be the greatest motherfucker in a certain point. Um, yeah, she should be allowed to be like you know what? I need you to come inside with me. You didn't. I'm kind of pissed about it. I got other shit going on and I can't take care of your feelings and my feelings too, so there, yes, we call that, that mediocrity.

Speaker 4: 1:13:48

We call white excellence coach True.

Speaker 2: 1:13:51

Fucking true, I have to say quickly, I will say that between Elon Musk and a certain former president, they are really blowing up the white man's game. Like the white, like you'll never be the same again, guys, they have fucked up your shit Cats out of the bag, cats out of the bag.

Speaker 4: 1:14:10

Um, yes, and and, and. There's this beat here. It's funny, like when you see one thing, you see it everywhere. Uh, Dr Sharon admits to Ted hey, listen, if I you taught me something. I thought I was the best, but it took me to open up to you, to really do this. In this moment where, where um Wayne is vulnerable to Dell, I was, um, I'm reading this book, uh, by Chicago's own Edwards Wick. Do you know, uh, ed's Wick, the American filmmaker boss, unfortunately not, no, the director of glory they were here of glory, oh, oh, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4: 1:14:43

Yeah, yeah Um, he wrote his uh. He's 71 years old, uh, proud son of Chicago. Uh, he wrote about his, uh, his Hollywood career and it's sort of everyone in town has written it. Um, but it is uh, it's so good and I really enjoyed it. But there was this one moment he was talking about where he got his first gig directing a feature film. He was hopping from TV to uh film and he was directing a, a, a film that later uh be called about last night I think it's called Um with a Rob starring Rob Lowe, and remember that one yeah.

Speaker 4: 1:15:20

His first first feature and he was getting into I guess Jim Belushi was in it Um and uh, chicago's own Jim Belushi and the two of them were, or just not. Jim was like not listening to him and this week was, you know, getting frustrated and they got into a shouting match and it was somewhere on the on the L? Um where they had to like get off the train. And then they he's like, as we're screaming, we see like the train they had to like do it on a loop cause you can't stop the train. So he's like, as we're yelling, like screaming, fuck you, no, fuck you, no, fuck you, no, fuck you Like. He's like I see the doors closed and our whole crew and the producers, like everyone just pulls away and the two of us are left on this platform.

Speaker 4: 1:16:07

And he's like we started running out of dialogue. It's so funny and and he was like at some point it was so hot, like physical violence was about to erupt. He's like I'll never know why I said it. He's like, but I was like, if you don't, I'm just really worried, man, like, if you don't do this, I'm going to lose my job. And I've never had it as my first feature film. I'll never get another one if they fired me off this and I'm just scared. Man and it's belushi, apparently instantly switched Like once he heard that he went oh, he's like they're not going to do anything. Come here, man, and he opened his arms and hugged him. He's like I got you, I got you and they've been friends ever since. Yeah.

Speaker 2: 1:16:50

It's, it's, it's fascinating those. Sorry coach, I didn't mean to cut you off, no, no, that's it.

Speaker 4: 1:16:54

That's the start, but it's like one year when you show that vulnerability right, but one person has to lean into the boat, right? Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2: 1:17:01

Exactly, and I'm not. I'm not as weak and don't pretend to be, but when I directed dinner for two coach will tell you I mean it was, you know, million dollar budget tops 14 days. I mean it was just. But for me this was my chance and this was the script I had written, that I had actually prayed and said out loud whatever my equivalent of prayers was. If I could only ever bring one thing to screen, it was going to be this thing and I had this chance to do it. So I was so on it. I mean I was, and we so I wanted to like break down every shot every minute, be walk on a set so prepared. My poor DP also wanted it and this was her first feature. She's gone on and like shoot all this Marvel stuff and whatever. She's amazing. And so she.

Speaker 2: 1:17:55

But she was like frankly tired and I was like, all right, we need to meet about this and we need to meet about this sequence and we need to, you know, and I was going to do all we want to do all these hours and she pushed back and was like, hey, like this is not normal during a shoot. Like you know, we do a long day and then you want to meet at night after the shoot. So we're kind of you know it's tense and she goes to get off. We're finishing up the meeting and she goes to get off the elevator. And I stepped off the elevator and I didn't do the exact same. I basically I said, look, I have been through so much, I traveled across the country, I left my family behind. This has been a nightmare and I feel like I have this one chance to prove that I was right and they were wrong and I can do this.

Speaker 2: 1:18:49

And I really started tearing up, like I started choking on it. It wasn't for a fact, like I was really like, look, I'm going to just lay it out. And I said I just need this thing to be great. I said I don't know that I'll ever get to do anything else. I need this to be great. And I watched her entire, like I could physically see her change. Yeah, and she was just like, okay, Like she, just like you know, she heard me. It didn't mean she wanted to meet for another five hours, but she, like she got what it was she was experiencing from me. Cut to later, just so I could feel like a total asshole in this story Cut to later. We've shot the thing, blah, blah, blah, and she announces that she's been pregnant the whole time.

Speaker 3: 1:19:33

Holy shit and. I was like okay, I didn't see that for a couple of hours.

Speaker 2: 1:19:38

I was like I am so fucking sorry. I am so fucking sorry. So she was like oh, I'm tired, because you know what it like say what the fuck was really going on. I was like I am the worst ever and I am so sorry. She, you know, she knocked it out of her too. Fantastic, anna, wherever you are, if you ever hear this, I still love you. Everything's fantastic. We ended up so tight.

Speaker 4: 1:20:01

No, no, I'm well, yeah we ended up so tight with everybody, coach. There's a reason that funny.

Speaker 2: 1:20:05

Yeah, yeah, I love you, I love you.

Speaker 4: 1:20:09

I, like you, should not get along with boss. I'm telling you she's not good. I want to point out, when we're looking at here at Wayne yeah, we just left Bradley saying oh that's so rude, right, and so he's back wherever they left him in the parking lot. But we don't point out continuity a lot because it's a you know it's a low budget show, they scrapped us together but it's not Bradley in the background right there.

Speaker 2: 1:20:38

You know it could be. I didn't notice it but it could be. And yeah, these things I mean, especially when you are just like running and gunning in and we use this shot, you know like it. Very well, it could be. I mean that person does, I mean they certainly, whoever that is, certainly favors him. If it's not him, right. But yeah, if you watch enough movies, this, this shit, shows up. I've been rewatching season three, total, totally a comfort view at this point. I've watched enough Ted Lasso that I can like categorize the views for you. So this one is just a total comfort view.

Speaker 2: 1:21:14

I was unhappy and I wanted to be happy and there are now like I've watched it enough that I can catch it like, wait a minute, he wasn't, he wasn't smiling in a two shot, yeah. And there are a few of those now that I'm like I caught, yeah, and it only took me 57 views in your face.

Speaker 4: 1:21:35

Yeah, no, I well this one. I get Sean Simmons and the and the and the writing team here of Wayne. They do such a great job with the ancillary characters that when I see this shot I see what might be Bradley. And then I see the other three people and I'm like, oh, what story lines for those three didn't have to get clipped out. You know I ended up on the editing room floor but you have this big, this nice moment. Well, you know, wayne is vulnerable. He says I just don't like him about hospitals, but I went for him and now I'm going to go for you, which I really like and which Dell likes. So can I come or whatever, but listen, dell likes it. Right, but Dell is Lucchetti. So is she going to fawn all over him? Absolutely not. She can like it without completely changing her demeanor. And what does she say here, coach?

Speaker 2: 1:22:29

in response to this very vulnerable gesture of his, she says don't expect a goddamn medal, because that's what that's, that's what you, that's what your welcome sounds like in the Lucchetti In Bostonese.

Speaker 4: 1:22:48

You know you don't expect a goddamn medal. So they walk in, there's some cops waiting and they zip into the nearest doorway and it puts them in the morgue, in the morgue of the hospital. And, boss, we've been watching For those listening the, I have watched Wayne many, many times, all the way through, many times. There are 10 episodes, boss and coach. We decided would watch it as if it's like an episodic show where they watch it and then and then we have the episode one at a time, so they don't know, like, for example, what's in episode eight. They're learning it the way that you guys are learning it at home. And so boss had gallbladder infection last last time I think it was.

Speaker 3: 1:23:44

I think you're intentionally at this point ignoring that it was 100% my ovary and not a gallbladder but it definitely definitely was an ovary, my apologies.

Speaker 4: 1:23:54

So she had kidney stones last time. And what happened was you did not get to see coach's reaction to this scene in real time. But, coach, why don't you walk us through this? Because you had a powerful reaction to it. I will start, I'll start it off and then I'll hand it over, because I like this thing. They walk in, they realize wait, we're in the morgue. There's a lot of a lot of cadavers who are covered by almost stiffs. And then I felt like, oh God, I'm such a trash person. You can't say funny.

Speaker 4: 1:24:27

A bunch of stiffs. That's horrible. These are human. Where the hell is that coming from? Anyway, a bunch of stiffs. I mean you use that as a term for someone who is dullered in real life, but you don't use it as for actual cadavers.

Speaker 3: 1:24:46

So I mean they do well, yeah, but also the rigor mortis means they are pretty stiff. It's descriptive, if nothing else.

Speaker 4: 1:24:53

See animals in the pit. I'm trying to get up the stairs, coach, and bosses reminding me. There are no stairs, we're all in the mosh pit, I mean you just, just, oh, you know what?

Speaker 3: 1:25:04

I will get out of the pit. Actually, I have a goal in life I will get out of the pit, and that is when I am launched from the trebuchet.

Speaker 4: 1:25:11

Yes, Out of the pit? Yes, we're back into the pit. Right, we're your stiff Right. Yes, and over, and one assumes, because of the rigor mortis that you've pointed out, ass over two kettles, as they say.

Speaker 3: 1:25:23

Yeah, as long as you can get everything together in time.

Speaker 2: 1:25:26

Otherwise I'm going to get sloppy again, oh wow. All right, okay, floppy again, I gotta be sure, let's talk about Wayne then I guess I don't know.

Speaker 4: 1:25:41

So Wayne says are all those dead? And then I just love this next line, so much it is so it is. So del is so snarky. She leans forward and she says what here, boss?

Speaker 3: 1:25:58

I don't know. Let me ask, excuse me Are you guys dead Such?

Speaker 2: 1:26:02

a fucking smart ass and she goes yeah, they're fucking dead.

Speaker 4: 1:26:06

They're fucking dead. And then we hear somebody come in and you know, someone jiggled the door and they duck when would you go? Where would you hide? Right, you're not a cheat and lover. So it's not under the bed or the closet. But wait, wait. What's the version of under the bed and the morgue? It is under the gurney that is holding the cadaver, which is draped with white sheets that go down far enough to obscure the bottom shelf of the metal sort of examining table or slash gurney. So Del says, shit, come on. They hear someone jiggle in the door. Shit, come on. They grab them, pulls them under the nearest cadaver.

Speaker 4: 1:26:52

For those watching at home, who don't watch the show and just listen to us saying, I'm not making this up, this is what they. They're in a morgue and they have gone underneath a dead body too high, not the body itself, underneath the table holding the dead body. So in walks too, looks like sheriffs or like they have that in Massachusetts. That's the. I know there's a word for it. It's the wide brimmed that we call this with the state police. Wear it, but it's not like the ball cap, it's the one with the hat goes all the way around. Is there a term for that boss? You should know this from your years in law enforcement.

Speaker 3: 1:27:33

The super troopers hat, the super troopers hat, that's right, thank you, thank you.

Speaker 4: 1:27:36

And so these two guys walk in. You got a younger one, sort of a smaller one, and a bigger one. And the smaller one says, yep, there's a son of a bitch right there, no fucking doubt. And this is where I love. We talk about how humans are messy and how this show captures it better than anyone, and also how there are no small roles in this show. Right, and there's the son of a bitch right there, no fucking doubt. He walks up to the guy and we do a quick cut to underneath. Right, you have Dell and Wayne are huddled face to face, really pushed together tightly to fit onto the metal shelving. And then we hear the guy, the little guy, punch Boom, the corpse, the cadaver, punch it. And the other guy goes dude, cut the shit, you can't be punching dead bodies.

Speaker 2: 1:28:38

And it's interesting cause we do have rules around that right, and I'm sure it's a lot, but like the respect you know, a certain level of respect that we are to, you know to show the body.

Speaker 4: 1:28:48

I mean we don't have, do we have? Hard and fast rules Like you can't punch a dead body, it's just a really.

Speaker 2: 1:28:53

it's like a well-known, accepted societal norm right, Right, like you just wouldn't do that. But yeah, you wouldn't do that.

Speaker 4: 1:29:00

He does. And so the guy chastises him, his partner. He says this guy killed my partner, I don't give two, goddamn. And then he stops and he says, wait, does this guy not have a mustache? And he pulls the sheet down, sees that the guy doesn't have a mustache and goes shit. Now his partner is looking at him like he's a complete turd. This is just, you're just like what? Again, they could have chosen anything. They could have had a nurse come in to get some syringes they could have. You know, when you create, when you're a creator, show creator, you create whatever. And but I love the inclination, the way that this show constantly paints characters full of vibrancy. Now we know this guy's partner got killed and he's suffering over it to the point where he's willing to hit a. Now it's the wrong cadaver. And his partner just looks at him like he's a fucking lunatic and he says you fucking idiot. And they walk out. And before the little guy walks out, who was doing the punching? He leans into the cadaver and what does he say?

Speaker 4: 1:30:18

boss, he goes, my bad man my bad man To the dead person and then covers his face up.

Speaker 3: 1:30:26

I have to say I obviously don't care that much about what happens to my body after I die, hence the Trebuchet jokes. And in real life I really do mean it, like put me in a hole. I don't care. If science could use anything, go for it, otherwise I don't care. I do like that some people respect the dead body enough. That one they would want to punch it, but then two also they would apologize to it. This is sort of like how you'll notice people will say excuse me to the dog if they accidentally like bump into it. I kind of like that.

Speaker 3: 1:31:04

Like the dog doesn't really understand but say excuse me, I'm sorry. Like it says more about humanity than anything else.

Speaker 4: 1:31:11

All I saw now was thanks, Alexa. We don't have an Alexa whenever he gets to use one or Siri or any AI. He's like. This is a data driven device. They're going to know who is polite to them before they take over, so I want to make sure I'm on record, as I always respected him. I feel like I can see him.

Speaker 2: 1:31:31

Yeah, he goes thank you very much Logicking that through.

Speaker 4: 1:31:34

He's like look hey just in case Drives his siblings. They're like you, idiot. Stop saying thank you to the computer.

Speaker 3: 1:31:42

He's like I got to play the thing that Siri says most often to me is I don't know how to respond to that, and that's what she's been programmed to say when you swear at her Right. So I'm I am in trouble.

Speaker 4: 1:31:56

So I say the most to you too, boss.

Speaker 2: 1:31:59

I don't know how how much curb either of you are watching. I watched for years and then skipped many seasons, Daphne watched and now I've started watching this most recent season and there's a great enthusiasm for those.

Speaker 4: 1:32:12

Sorry, sorry, yeah, no, you said yeah.

Speaker 2: 1:32:15

But there's a moment where Larry David and I generally don't deal with Siri too much because it's more trouble it's almost always more trouble than it's worth. But he starts to add, like get direction someplace, and Siri is completely fucking it up. And he refers to Siri as a see you next Tuesday, which is a word I never use. But I laughed so hard. I don't know why, like, but the idea of calling disproportionately, yeah, like what? But like he's trying to get directions to lunch and Siri's fucking up, I just laughed so hard. So, anyway, that idea of like, engaging with Siri like a person, like, for real.

Speaker 3: 1:33:03

Oh, I get actively angry at her. I know that she's not real, but also I'm like God damn it, siri, you, stupid, fucking bitch You're wrong. That's not what I asked you for.

Speaker 3: 1:33:12

God damn it, Siri. I am a middle-aged white lady with 17 national albums on you on the database On you. They live on your body. They live on you, you know you know God damn well, when I say play WBEZ, which is our local NPR station, I am not asking to hear easy by Chris Brown. You fucking know it, you fucking know it, and you still do that to me once a goddamn week. Just just play iRigLas, that's all I'm looking for.

Speaker 2: 1:33:44

Don't start. No shit Won't be. No shit, siri, amen.

Speaker 4: 1:33:49

Well, this guy says my bad man, and he walks out and then, coach, I want you to take it from him because you had such a wonderful response to the rest of this.

Speaker 2: 1:33:58

This is fun because I don't remember actually the what my reaction was. So let's go. So the door closes, we cut directly to a really provocative shot. It's like the we're at the feet of a corpse, so you can actually see the toe tag, which the whole time I had been thinking about toe tags, because the feet, for some reason, jumped out at me. Their feet weren't covered, which makes sense. And then we go to the shot again underneath the gurney where they've been hiding. White sheet on both sides is actually quite pretty, with the light diffusing through. Blah, blah, blah.

Speaker 2: 1:34:34

So it is yeah, wait, I think it's okay to go from Wayne. Wait, not yet. And they've now. They're now having this very tender moment. And what hit me, I knew as soon as she grabbed his jacket. I was like these two, most appropriately, are going to have their first kiss and fucking more. I just like, I was like, I resent this, like they are such sweet kids, life has dealt them all the shitty things and of course, of course, these two would have this kiss in a morgue, like, like, in a way, I feel like how could I believe? Even before we got in here, you should have been able to ask me Orlando. Where will they have their first kiss? And I should have been able to guess a morgue Right, yes, yes, absolutely right.

Speaker 4: 1:35:33

Well said coach, like what the fuck Anyway.

Speaker 2: 1:35:35

so yeah, so we're there, we're on the table. It's a very tender moment. These two are so sweet, I just want to bottle this shit. And so my dad was different before my mom died, so that's also like speaks to why we're delivering the Kooli now. We all were, I guess, but right. So she's trying to like explain him. I don't know, he wasn't always such a dick, or maybe he was, and my mom made him less or or better or whatever. But I mean, this is her returning the intimacy of what Wayne shared outside. Yes, exactly Right.

Speaker 4: 1:36:21

So she's not going to get it.

Speaker 2: 1:36:22

You know what I mean If he goes. I got no one, which is also deep because we know he's got two brothers, but we also get what is meant by it.

Speaker 4: 1:36:34

Yeah, but does she have them? It's so interesting. They're so vacuous and slight you know what I mean Like they're not. At least Bobby Luchetti has some sort of like anchor to him, some sort of gravitas.

Speaker 2: 1:36:48

Yeah, he's there. To reality, it's on some level.

Speaker 4: 1:36:51

They're like a happy meal. You know what I mean. You're just like. Like they're merely disposable as humans. You just go. What are you? All they do is repeat him or each other. They have no perspective. You know they're nothing, if not like. It's like a. They're sort of what is the word I'm looking for? What's the word boss? Let's draw on a little D&D knowledge, where you sort of create minions if you're a sorcerer or something that you create like a constructs or something like that. Well, whatever it is like. If we're talking video game jargon or D&D something, it's like if you kill the sorcerer who created the things they would evaporate to. You know what I mean. It's like what? Are they?

Speaker 4: 1:37:38

Oh right, yeah right, the head vampire too, also right, correct, that's the same thing. So you understand, I think, why they're not part of the equation, and it's interesting that it's a little bit of a delayed reaction with Dell. So when he opens up, right, she doesn't get soft Like she is very vulnerable here. I don't know where the fuck this comes from. Oh boss knows, but it didn't happen on the spot, it didn't happen like in real time. Her first natural reaction was a defense mechanism. Don't expect a fucking medal, right, because hardness is her default setting. It's only when she has a second to actually be physically close. Maybe her love language is touched, maybe this physical closeness softens her up. Maybe the looming sort of approaching moment of giving the koolie to her dad is starting to really nod her emotionally. Whatever it is, she says, yeah, if he goes, I got no one. Keep going here, coach.

Speaker 2: 1:38:52

Well, hold on, because I'm super curious to hear bosses take on where. Yeah, because I felt like I saw a moment of connection there. Sorry, go ahead.

Speaker 3: 1:39:03

No, no, no, I was going to interrupt him, so thank you. I think the one thing is that we say normalize blah, blah, blah too much, but normalize people's immediate reaction, not being their genuine emotional reaction to something Like, especially in difficult situations, you will go on autopilot and do whatever is most comfortable and then discover what your emotions about that situation were later. So sometimes you need a second literally to process it especially because this is a highly emotional moment for her.

Speaker 3: 1:39:39

So there's that, I think. Also, I love the way that they did this because I love a channel Sunshine and Spotless Mind.

Speaker 2: 1:39:47

So do I.

Speaker 3: 1:39:49

And I also get very not annoyed.

Speaker 3: 1:39:51

But there's a scene where Clementine and Joel are they've just first started dating their in bed and they are under the covers like literally have pulled the covers up over them and they are talking about like deep, important childhood memories and it's supposed to be this time when they connected, really fell in love.

Speaker 3: 1:40:10

I think it was great when we saw that in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and then it somehow became a thing where, it's like, in order to show their physical closeness, we're going to show these two people under the covers being close and intimate with each other, and it's too much, we've seen it too often. This is a way that they organically got to the point where you need to be physically close underneath something covered all around so that you are right in each other's faces and it doesn't come off as cliched or weird. The story called for it. They had to do it. I think that having a couple of minutes of distance from what he said and also now being this physically close and having to deal with him is what prompted her to be able to talk about this.

Speaker 2: 1:40:57

I also think in terms of dealing with grief, which I won't take us down that whole road, but there's something about having something to do. I've thought about this a lot over the last couple of years, like all the rituals we had and we've talked about this some, but all the ritual we have around death and this and that, and if you're going to the pack store and then you're mixing the drink and then you got to deliver the drink and then you got to do, right, like there's an amount of movement that allows you to not deal with the fact that you lost your mom for reasons we still don't fully understand, you didn't get to go to the funeral, you're in a morgue, like talk about facing death, right. So I think the fact that she's forced to stop it's almost like the emotion catches up with her in this moment, because she stopped Like she was out running it and now she had to wait.

Speaker 4: 1:41:58

Right, nice. Yeah, no, that's exactly right, but it's definitely there, it's palpable, it's clever how they got here. I like what Boss said about like oh, the story organically sort of called for it, but it was written this way. You know, it's like, but it's not done in a way where it feels forced, it just feels completely natural, totally by it yeah, and then what happens, Coach?

Speaker 2: 1:42:25

So, but you do now, though. So he's basically declaring you got me, and then he says right. So then he's like I'm saying you got me, do you wanna got me? Which I thought was really great. And that is the moment where we have our kiss and they're just again. I just wanna bottle this, like in the midst of all this insanity, they are just the sweetest. So yeah, so we get that bit of a push in from above them. Well done In an interesting way. It's passionate, but by that I don't mean sexual, it's just like a lot of emotion being expressed in this moment. Absolutely it's powerful.

Speaker 4: 1:43:12

Listen we waited seven episodes to get their first kiss, yeah, and it felt worth it.

Speaker 2: 1:43:20

And I love that there's a cut to guess whatever movement we've got going on underneath there. Not putting that in a gross way, just there's some movement.

Speaker 4: 1:43:30

There's camera movement, we push in and we pull out.

Speaker 2: 1:43:32

Yeah, and then the arm of one of the bodies I soon wanna try to above them falls to the side of the table in the frame. So I thought that again. Just when you're like, oh, I'll just sit here and enjoy all this sweetness, like there's this reminder that there's a whole story going on outside the sheets.

Speaker 4: 1:43:54

Yeah, and then somebody some orderly starts to move the actual table and he's got like his earbuds in and just kinda grooving and moves them out and goes right past the I don't wanna say Jay and Silent Bob, jay and Sergeant.

Speaker 4: 1:44:17

Gellar, that's funny and they're talking at the front desk. Jay is saying please don't embarrass me for that fine-ass cafeteria lady. As well done as the reason they were under the corpse was. I have no idea why the orderly leaves the like a cadaver in the middle of a aisle for a second, but he does. And Gellar pops out Before that. We hear Gellar is complaining about the quality of the ciabatta that he got and Jay is like nobody told you to get the ciabatta. He's like all right, I'm gonna go get a potato. And so Gellar heads off to the cafeteria and Jay says make sure you tell my girlfriend Beyonce in the cafeteria. You know I'm looking forward to lunch tomorrow to Sarge. This is all over top. While Dell is sneaking into Bobby's room, she glances through like the. It has the type of a window that has like the chicken wire fencing in it, like the security window. I don't know why, but she notices that the person in the next bed over from Bobby's room is asleep. Was this little girl there?

Speaker 2: 1:45:32

Yeah, I didn't think that was a coincidence. That was a very sweet father-daughter scene comparison.

Speaker 4: 1:45:40

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then we pan over to we have a camera, move over to follow Dell's subjective camera, looking through the window and we see Bobby is asleep in the bed. He is restrained, he has restraints around his wrists and he is on his back, head tilted back. He's sort of, you know, snorting and mucusy, like you imagine anybody who lives in New England area would be from all the pollen, and he is messed up. He looks like hell licks his lips. He's fully asleep and Dell walks in, she gets up the nerve and she goes right next to the bed, puts the mixed Cape Cod Cooley plastic bottle on the little sort of elevated tray next to his bed and stands there with her arms crossed.

Speaker 2: 1:46:36

I just want to share quickly. We don't have to discuss it because we've already talked about this drink, but when she put that bottle down and it said pink grapefruit, I really retched, like I was like, oh my God, it was even worse. It was even worse. This cream involved in something that also has pink grapefruit, like I, just like. That was terrible.

Speaker 4: 1:46:59

I really want to try it. I'm dying to try it. I want to just give it a whirl, just to see. I want to be able to say, oh, that's rude, like Bradley. Um, she stands right there and then walk us through this boss.

Speaker 3: 1:47:14

So Bobby wakes up, takes him a second to realize Dell is in fact standing there. She isn't necessarily happy to see him but is glad that he is responsive. He says to Lila, she says hey, daddy, it's not a standoff. Because she immediately says brought you a Cape Cod Cooley. And he says, hey, you, um, takes him a second, you coming home? Because that's what he wanted to check about. He didn't even say are you okay, like are you all right? Are you coming home? And we've discussed before about how it's more a property than anything else. It just hammers home the fact that that is what he's most concerned about. What she says is the cops said you were dying.

Speaker 4: 1:47:59

Yeah, you died. And the cops said you're dying, yeah.

Speaker 3: 1:48:02

Cops said you're dying. He says cops lie. Shockingly. Can't believe Bobby Luchetti would say that. Um.

Speaker 2: 1:48:08

I love that he's right, though, like also he's right, but you're right.

Speaker 3: 1:48:11

Yeah, no, also also. He is in fact right. And then Bobby looks over, sees Wayne, starts getting upset, says you, you motherfucker. Now he's starting to like try to against his struggle, against his restraints. What are you doing in my goddamn room? Well, come on. And then Dowell grabs his hand and says bye, daddy. And he's screaming Teddy, Carl, she's up.

Speaker 2: 1:48:34

I mean it's a second bye daddy, because that's what she said on the back of the bike one. But also the minute he looks over and sees Wayne and says you motherfucker, she moves. She's like, oh, I know, like I have seen this movie, yes, but it's not like she waits. And is he like, is he gonna like she knows exactly what he's about to do and she's like we gotta get the fuck out of here immediately. So I just let those as much as the Cape Cod Cooley was a reality. She knows her father, she knows that man.

Speaker 4: 1:49:06

Yeah, and they back out. She's by daddy Bobby's screaming wait, teddy Carl. And he's screaming. He's here, he's in the hospital Like he's screaming nurse Anybody that'll listen. And they back out and we get this great shot. I really love this shot. We got a shot of them backing out and then we see them look down the hallway and we pivot and it's Geller coming back, sergeant Geller coming back with a paper plate with an aluminum wrapped potato on it.

Speaker 2: 1:49:37

Because it's such, because I don't know when they thought of it, but it's such a specific thing to get. If that had been a burger or this or that, like you wouldn't know what it is, but the fact he mentioned that potato, you also know, like it's just a specific thing to have to hold and somehow it adds something to the absurdity of this scene but also like making it life.

Speaker 4: 1:50:01

And what does he say Coach?

Speaker 2: 1:50:02

Steady. So he's like he knows. You know that's a good place to start with Wayne. He says I just want to talk which cops lie, and then they take off running. He'll stop, but holes as he's running, he is holding, he continues to hold the potato, and I don't know. It adds a lot to the scene for me that he because it's to me it's also that's true Like if you don't think about it. I'm sure if you stopped him and thought do you need to hold on to the potato or you can get another potato, you'd be like, of course, but in the course of that all happening you wouldn't think to put the potato down. You just don't run in after them. So it works.

Speaker 2: 1:50:45

We go into what is looks like MRI room and he's now got them essentially cornered, which, as we all know, the best thing to do with a dangerous animal is corner it. So he said so. Gellar says I'm here as a friend. Yeah, which he? I mean one, we know it's true. But also Wayne does have to ask himself, like what's this guy doing? I mean, I guess he has that time now to ask it, but like, why is he here? Like, it does seem like there's got to be an explanation beyond. I'm in trouble. Um, my name is Sergeant Steven Geller. I'm from Brockton, just like you. Right, okay, everything's okay, let's not. Let's not do anything crazy.

Speaker 4: 1:51:32

He does move away from from the door coach, right he?

Speaker 2: 1:51:35

yeah, as he's saying that I'm not trapping you.

Speaker 4: 1:51:37

I'm not trapping you. He's smart enough to say like all right, I am not getting between you and the door.

Speaker 2: 1:51:41

And he's got his hands up in the universal. I mean, you know, harm, I come in peace.

Speaker 4: 1:51:47

Just right, yep, um, I come from Brockton, just like you.

Speaker 2: 1:51:52

Eat town spa pizza. So he's like this. I mean, this is almost like like a, a hostage negotiator, like creating like a personal connection and you know we're all friends here Um.

Speaker 4: 1:52:04

I love this. He says I eat town spa pizza just like you.

Speaker 2: 1:52:07

And there we go. Now. Do you like town spa pizza? Cape Cod Cafe is better, and it from Wayne, and Del finishes the thought with buy a fucking mile.

Speaker 2: 1:52:20

So they are on a side, like is it a great way to show Like they are in sync, they are together. Um, gellis has a lot of people would agree with that. So he's like all right, I got you. I got you Now. Look, wayne Dell, I'm here Now as a police officer. Are you a police officer? He didn't realize. He fucked that up. Now he's got a new problem. Not officially right now. I'm a bit off the clock, so we don't have to listen to you officially right now.

Speaker 2: 1:52:46

Dell sort it out like what's actually happened here. He sighs, huh. He realizes that he's in trouble. Look, I've done a lot of thinking about what I was going to say to you and now I don't know what I'm going to say to you. So he's really trying. I mean, he is really trying. He's here. I want to give you something that you've never been given. What is that? And that's a chance to get out. And he points toward the door. Even he's like listen, I'm not here to harm you. All right, before you get caught up in the current of a life you never wanted to begin with. He's laid it out there, but I need you to trust me. And that's where it derails. Trust you. Cops lied and said my dad was dying. Yeah, okay, yeah, okay. That's why I'm trying to help. Once other police officers get involved, once you get down to Florida, and I mean he knows their whole deal.

Speaker 4: 1:53:44

Yeah, you know he understands their whole deal. He says God knows whatever's waiting for you down there. You know he has been tracking them, he's been trying to figure out what this speech is going to be. And he says you know, I'm trying to give you a chance before you get caught up in life. God knows whatever's waiting for you down there. And then we hear the machine kick on and coach keep going here. What, what happens? Looks like Wayne gets an erection. Is that what, right?

Speaker 2: 1:54:15

So Wayne's jacket pocket starts to pull toward the MRI machine Like we're dealing with a magnetic field. We see Dell's name plate, you know, reached toward the, being pulled also toward our Dell necklace, the necklace of her.

Speaker 4: 1:54:35

It literally the the charm on her neck this is Dell is pulled.

Speaker 2: 1:54:40

Yeah, it's like parallel to the ground almost.

Speaker 4: 1:54:41

Yeah, it's great and we get an insert of the door that says no metal allowed in the room. Right, right, so so.

Speaker 2: 1:54:50

So we've got a new factor in this game. And what's in the pocket, that help that is pulling Wayne jacket, that famous hammer we've seen all along. And it turns out Gellar's got some metal of his own. Because he at that point is like, all right, I'm going to pull my gun because that's a hammer. Look, wayne, steady Wayne, I know the kind of man. Your father was Right. And he gives up his gun. He, he turns and allows the gun to to be pulled toward the machine. And Wayne holds up his hammer, quite Thor like actually. And Gellar's telling them to take it easy. And instead of taking it easy, wayne lets it go and allows the forces of nature to do their job. The hammer is pulled, clocks Gellar between the eyes.

Speaker 2: 1:55:42

Third eye, third eye took a real shot. Here comes Jay running. Now he sees Gellar down, he goes to get him. God damn what happened. They just left. Go go. He's reaching for his gun now and off he goes. He cocks the gun I mean, we are, he's got one in the chamber and he's running after Wayne. He bumps into Tweedlede and Tweedledum.

Speaker 4: 1:56:03

What is your problem? What the fuck is your problem? This is ridiculous. These guys are so they, of course, are in the way.

Speaker 2: 1:56:10

And of course, miss Dell, like she may have walked right by them, like they just left right, so OK, and of course, jay is still in his, in his high tension tensile strength, hospital to hospital socks.

Speaker 2: 1:56:25

Right, right, right, right Right. That's yes, so he's got. He's got on the traction socks. He better not try out on a wall. He pushes them out of the way, runs outside, sees Wayne getting on the bike with the jacket and the hoodie and the whole thing. He grabs Wayne off the bike, takes them down and it is our new dad. Wayne has apparently traded the bike for the car. What's the guy's name? Sorry, bradley.

Speaker 4: 1:56:53

Bradley's. So yeah, so Wayne is obviously arrangement is, but is. But Bradley's got Wayne's jacket on, he's got the bike Right.

Speaker 2: 1:57:02

Yeah, so this is yeah, so they. They definitely wanted to throw whoever came running out of the hospital off the trail. I got a little boy on the way. I'm going to be a dad.

Speaker 4: 1:57:13

Yeah, don't shoot me, bro. I got a little boy on the way I'm going to be a dad. And then he realizes what he just said to Jay and he puts his head back on the concrete and he says I'm going to be a dad.

Speaker 2: 1:57:25

He repeats it like it's like it became real to him in that moment and then he says outlaw and Jay gets up as a fuck.

Speaker 4: 1:57:34

And now listen, I was really impressed that Jay tackled the guy on a bike. I was like I was like a way to go, officer, can Eddie like right, that was pretty. That's, that's the husband. He is it. He is not a little boy, he is off.

Speaker 2: 1:57:44

He's not. Yeah, he snatched him off that bike. Yeah, he really did. And Brad has a smile on his face, which I liked because he's already expressed the holy shit, you know, I got somebody. And then the next step of that, that's our last shot of Bradley yeah. Who.

Speaker 4: 1:58:02

I think was a really fun character for all of us. We all liked him and he's a horse's ass, but super fun, super fun, interesting, weird, whatever. True to true to fact, true to how this story goes. And out comes Geller at a dead sprint. And what does Jay say here, coach?

Speaker 2: 1:58:22

They're gone, sarge, what do you think about your boy now and Geller's bleeding from his forehead, where you got clocked, and he says no more chances and that is not a great sign. So.

Speaker 4: 1:58:40

I thought boss would really like that, because this is this feels like your thing, boss, where it's like OK, listen, I will try to be nice, but like you, show me who you are, I'm going to. That's it, I it's. I'm sure I would be like. I don't think he meant to let that hammer go. Maybe maybe one more chance. Maybe one one more chance. That's funny.

Speaker 3: 1:59:04

Well, you know, rewatching it. I'm not sure if Geller actually did give his gun away. I was going to say that too. It was pulled from it.

Speaker 4: 1:59:14

I thought I thought it was pulled from.

Speaker 2: 1:59:15

I didn't think he did that Really. I thought he did it to give it up. I kind of like your way better, you're right.

Speaker 4: 1:59:20

No, I kind of like your way better If he did. I think that's really clever, but I thought he just I thought it sucked it out of his hand yeah, yeah, yeah, it could be.

Speaker 3: 1:59:27

I think like to be fair, his police training probably did catch kick in. He saw somebody holding a weapon in this case, a hammer is a weapon and he was like I got to draw my fucking gun. I think what I like most about this scene actually is the authenticity of the storytelling, that Dell and Wayne don't know what Geller's motivations are.

Speaker 1: 1:59:54

They don't know that he has been saying this kid might need another chance.

Speaker 3: 1:59:58

They know that the cops lie, the cops lied to get them to the hospital and that they were wanted by the police. So I'm not saying that Dell or that Wayne was right to allow the hammer to hit Geller in the forehead, but from his perspective he doesn't know if he can trust him or not. Us knowing is a different sort of insight that we have.

Speaker 2: 2:00:20

Right.

Speaker 3: 2:00:21

Their characters were reacting the way that I expected them to, and in Geller's defense I do understand that he would say no more chances. It's like yeah, he has. Wayne has a record of attacking people at school, of being a delinquent, of not having a strong social support system. As dad just died, there isn't a lot of real. Geller also doesn't know everything about Wayne to know that he should be able to trust Wayne in these ways.

Speaker 3: 2:00:49

And these are the things that happen in real life. Like you can have a story where everybody understands everything about everyone else immediately. That's not going to lead to a lot of conflict, or often conflict. That seems very satisfying.

Speaker 4: 2:01:02

It says last of season two.

Speaker 3: 2:01:04

No, no, no, I didn't say it, I did not say it. I did not say it, but that's fine In this case.

Speaker 4: 2:01:13

Serenity now. Serenity now.

Speaker 3: 2:01:16

But in this case you have people who are working with reasonable understandings of the other person and making mistakes and that happens in real life all the fucking time. So having it there. Geller is not a bad guy for saying no more chances. Wayne isn't necessarily a bad guy for letting the hammer hit him in the forehead. This is how conflict happens that people are coming at issues from the opposite sides and that's making their actions incompatible.

Speaker 4: 2:01:44

And the fact that we get that defense from boss. This is the thing I knew. I just really love the show and the fact that you can, without much effort at all. Well, you know, low effort is kind of a boss's motto you can easily see. It's not like you have to leap through hoops to go like, yeah, I see why he would do it, I see what he would do it. Like I totally, that's how stakes get set up and that's how you as a viewer believe stakes, because you're like, yeah, this is, this is the nature of conflict. Geller Geller dabs his forehead and we zoom super tight, shot into the hammer in his hand he's now holding. Where etched into the, the handle is the name of our titular character and it says Wayne and then we get the compulsory splash screen that says Wayne and the music and we're mostly out. Right, that's usually end, but they started out these little fun buttons at the end. That wasn't something that did it with every episode. But, boss, walk us through this last sort of little button.

Speaker 3: 2:03:01

Oh, it's Bobby Luchetti, struggling as fiercely as he possibly can, rattling the bed, shouting fuck, god damn it, motherfucker. Obviously because he needs to go rescue his daughter. Oh wait, no actually he's just trying to get the fucking cooly Just so pissed that it's just out of his reach, just fast as fingertips, and then he accidentally knocks it off the table and continues screaming.

Speaker 2: 2:03:25

Quickly. I'll toss this in because it's more to the scene I think deserves some conversation. But I think it's also fascinating that the thing he wanted was almost within reach and it's his own inability to manage his own emotions. That is why he is not presently enjoying that delicious cave car cooly, because she brought it to him and would have given it to him had she not had to run because he started screaming that the motherfucker was in his room. So it's just, you know, he's so in his own way.

Speaker 3: 2:03:57

It can possibly begin to see it and if he hadn't been an asshole beforehand, they wouldn't have restrained him in the first place and that.

Speaker 4: 2:04:05

It's an allegory for everything that's happening in his life.

Speaker 3: 2:04:09

Same reason that he got tased, like he just cannot keep his shit together.

Speaker 4: 2:04:15

It's really pretty. And then what happens here, boss?

Speaker 3: 2:04:18

Oh, and then the little girl from next door that Luchetti has been talking shit about the family the entire time is standing in front of him. She waves. She's got a really cute little flower headband too, like Angelica and adorable.

Speaker 4: 2:04:33

Yeah, I was going to say Angelica, a garland of white flowers.

Speaker 3: 2:04:36

Like she is angelic yes. And she says hi, and he waves back and then indicating basically how much she wants the drink Smiling at her, trying to charm her. This is the flip side of not being able to control his own emotions. Is that he is somehow able to convince her to pick up the drink. Get him a straw so that he could finally enjoy it.

Speaker 4: 2:05:03

And yeah, the final shot is him sucking for Ollie's worth out of one of those little. You know the internal diameter, you know inside diameter of those little crazy straws is like nothing. It's like a Capri Sun sort of straw and he is sucking for Ollie's worth and she's holding the thing for her. But he did get managed to get the cape.

Speaker 2: 2:05:30

Well, it underscores sort of this function of the whole story, right, like Dell tells us that that's one of my childhood memories is mixing up this disgusting concoction for my father so he could get plastered. And then she goes and she does it, and then he convinces yet another child to give it to him. So the crazy straw to me just is like yeah, just a bit of highlighting of as a rule, let's not engage children in our drinking. Just try that out, see how that goes.

Speaker 4: 2:06:07

I mean unless you need to.

Speaker 3: 2:06:08

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I mean, I will fully admit, and this might, this might just be the Chicago one in me, but like, yeah, no, don't make your kid mix you the drinks to get you plastered. But also I know a lot of stand up, decent, good men who are good fathers that would also say to their kids hey honey, can you go grab me a millen light from the garage fridge, can you? Can you go run?

Speaker 2: 2:06:34

and grab that. Yeah, I'll allow it. I mean yeah, sometimes. Yeah, it's not why you have kids to shag Bruce.

Speaker 3: 2:06:43

I mean, there has to be something that you guys like about him.

Speaker 2: 2:06:47

Yeah, seriously.

Speaker 4: 2:06:52

Well that you know. Wait before we finish up. I want to say did. Are we meant to understand that Bradley had some of the Cape Cod Cooley that's so rude drank the rest of it, decided to make the wrong choice. And then officer J like was he running? Was it looked like he was? Oh, I didn't. And then officer J no, I didn't think so no.

Speaker 3: 2:07:14

No, I didn't think so. I thought that Wayne was like you would keep the bike and the jacket, but like you have to get him off of us, you're going to have to be the decoy.

Speaker 4: 2:07:28

That was so he didn't get money for it or something like that. You think no, he got the bike in the badass jacket. He talked about how badass.

Speaker 3: 2:07:33

The bike was Right, that's the that's and he had it within the context of just get out of the road and fucking take off. Okay, I think that this is he is going to keep the bike and become a club.

Speaker 2: 2:07:43

I don't know how I decided this and I am now about 95% sure I made the shut up, but in my head Brad had a car and they swapped. He said I will give you the bike if you give me your car, okay. So I don't know where I got that from.

Speaker 4: 2:08:04

Yeah, okay, well, well, shucks folks. That is it for today. That that is the. The. The blissful end of Wayne, episode seven, of the last forever. We will be back next time with Wayne. Episode eight must have burned like hell. That is the title of the episode.

Speaker 4: 2:08:26

I cannot wait, oh God, I am so excited for everyone to watch these last three. I cannot wait to see coach and boss watching these. You know, we should probably do a watch party. Maybe we'll do a watch party on the site. Maybe we'll do that so we can, so people can watch with us if they want to. Let's think to see if we can figure something like that out. If anyone's interested in that, hit us up on the on the on the community site, and we'll try to make it happen. It's just that these three are are so much fun it does.

Speaker 4: 2:09:01

I don't think it ends the way people think it's gonna end. But you know, I I'm curious to see how everyone imagines it'll go. But there's a lot, there's a lot crammed into eight, nine and, of course, 10, and that is it. There is no more Wayne. It'll never be made. Everyone has aged out of their roles by by about six or seven years already. So it is a, it is something a beautiful moment in time, and we're so happy that you took this ride with us and got to share these, these, you know, these, these conversations about it with us. Coach, where do people find you if they want to find you?

Speaker 2: 2:09:45

Come through the community site. Community site I've been, I've been pumping this. You gotta, you gotta like, you gotta subscribe. You gotta tell your friends we gotta move up the list on Apple Podcasts. Let's, let's, let's make it happen, folks, let's make it happen. We're not. We're not far away. There's no place like Richmond.

Speaker 4: 2:10:05

You're darn tootin coach and boss. What about you?

Speaker 3: 2:10:08

I will also reiterate the community site and I promise to be there more, also on threads, usually just blocking people every once in a while. Dunking on some depends on the day. On threads it is Emily dot chambers, dot 31 or blue sky, which is Emily chambers. I will again plug the antagonist, even though I've been neglecting it. That is antagonist blogcom. If anybody wants to talk to me about the 1997 movie a life less ordinary by Danny Boyle starring Cameron Diaz and Ewan McGregor, there is a similar plot point to the motorcycle. It's one of my favorite in cinema history. So if anybody wants to watch that and hit me up on any of those places I will talk for a long time about it.

Speaker 4: 2:11:00

Don't write about that on the antagonist whatever you do. Just just don't, because that would be a really good thing to read, just don't. Just make sure you only talk about it like offline, that's. I love Danny Boyle, huge Danny Boyle fan.

Speaker 3: 2:11:14

Yeah.

Speaker 4: 2:11:15

Yeah.

Speaker 3: 2:11:16

I really like him shallow, grave. Not enough people saw that either.

Speaker 4: 2:11:19

No, no, he's, he's, he's legit. Okay, that's it. Thank you everybody. We really appreciate you staying with us and joining us for all this, all this conversation. Like I said, next time we'll be weighing.

Speaker 4: 2:11:32

Episode eight must have earned like hell we are. So here's where we are. I want to give people the lay of the land because I'm terrible at that. That's the now and not now nature of my ADHD coach. Coach is always like wait, what are we? You should see behind the scenes when they're like coach about like are we like what are we? What are we watching today? Like what is it? Oh, oh, oh, I thought you could read my mind, sorry. So, yeah, we're going to come back. What we're trying to do is finish up Wayne and Ted Lasso. The fine, we're in the final episode of Ted Lasso, season two. We have that to finish up. We have eight, nine and 10 of Wayne to finish up. I can't say what order we're going to do them in. I lean toward blasting out Wayne First. I've made a tentative agreement with coach because he you know when you you have actual friends that that push back and stuff. So I'll be like hey here's my idea.

Speaker 4: 2:12:26

And he's like I'm gonna, you know, let me run something by you. He's just like so he wants to do a little bit of Wayne and then finish up Ted Lasso and then finish up Wayne. I don't know what we're going to do, but we're going to finish them up generally in tandem and then, and then we'll be able to open our next show, which we have not announced yet, but it's great and it's going to be a lot of fun. That show is going to be. We might make, we might make boss cry, if we can. We might, we might, I don't know. Might might be something we do. Ok, so that is it. Thank you for supporting us. Please like and subscribe and do the review thing and do the. You know anything you can do to help help. The podcast really helps. We're really close to sort of leveling up and as much support as we can get really makes a world of difference.

Speaker 4: 2:13:16

I know that I look at the numbers and I can see you know sort of who's what. I can't see who you are, I cannot see that, but I can see the numbers and what people watch and I know that many of you have been with us from the beginning and that you have listened to hundreds I don't think we're in thousands yet. I should add up all the hours. I don't think we're in thousands yet, but it's hundreds and hundreds of of hours of listening to us platter. If you if you can can get yourself to subscribe and you try to divide that number by the three, the minimum payment is three dollars a month. If you can do three dollars a month for the hundreds and hundreds of hours that you've seen, it must come out. I'm not so good at math, boss, but it's got to be. It's got to be a reasonable fee, I would think. Is that right?

Speaker 3: 2:14:11

I can put it in a spreadsheet and let you know, but I have no idea. Yeah, please don't.

Speaker 4: 2:14:15

But but in general, if you, if you're able to, and say you know what, I'll throw these idiots a bone Every little bit really, really, really helps that you wouldn't believe how the numbers work behind the scenes and what it means if you a lot of you listen and only I think 80 percent of our listeners, who listen every single time, are actually subscribed. So if you're in the 20 percent that haven't just checked the box to subscribe, please do that. We'll automatically come into your feed and also it helps our numbers. Every little bit helps and we really appreciate it. So we'll be back next time. Until then, please support your local libraries and the written word and until Wayne, episode eight must have burned like hell we are rich, rich rich. We finally get enough. Yeah, forever Right. And forever.

Speaker 4: 2:15:21

Okay, thanks everybody, we'll see you next time.