The Gladiator Mindset: How to Win When Everything's Against You | Dariush Soudi

The Gladiator Mindset. Two heart attacks, £100 million lost, and 20 years learned the hard way. Then $700 in his pocket, everyone had given up, and Dubai was supposed to be a fresh start.

Dariush Soudi built and lost empires - gyms, tech companies, franchises - before arriving in Dubai broke, broken, and starting again from scratch.

In this conversation with Matt Haycox, Dariush breaks down what doing it the hard way really costs you, why most people are conditioned to lose before they even start, and how walking into every room like a gladiator became the philosophy that rebuilt everything.

Chapters
0:00 - Coming Up
0:16 - Intro
0:49 - Dariush's Childhood
5:38 - Future and Career Prospects as a Child
9:51 - Why did your family move to England?
10:20 - Skiving A-Levels
11:20 - Going into Sales, Working Hard, Becoming a Natural
12:26 - Biggest Mistakes You've Made in Sales
16:03 - Dariush as a Parent - Anger Issues, In and Out of Prison in England Growing Up
17:24 - Dubai Jail
22:46 - Sales Career in Dariush's 20s
28:16 - Dodgy Business Partners and Heart Attack from Stress
33:36 - Arriving to Dubai with No Money
37:05 - The Origin of 'Gladiator'
39:16 - Selling Events
46:04 - Why Dariush Does What He Does
47:52 - Final Thoughts

Follow Dariush Soudi
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dariushsoudiofficial/?hl=en
Website: https://dariushsoudi.com/ 

Enjoyed this episode? Please subscribe to Stripping Off with Matt Haycox and leave a ★★★★☆ review on Apple Podcasts or Buzzsprout – it really helps others find us! 

Transcript

Proving Your Worth Begins

SPEAKER_00 0:00

I realized that it was my mum would tell me I was no good, I was useless, this, this, this, all the abuse. So I think inside of me was like, fuck you, Mom, I'm gonna show you. I'm gonna show you that I am not the useless person you say I am.

SPEAKER_01 0:15

Darius Soudy, welcome to the show, buddy. Thank you, man. Appreciate it. I'm looking forward to having the original gladiator himself here. Russell Crowe's nobody with his with his gladiator.

SPEAKER_00 0:25

Do you know Russell Crowe? I think he's a year younger than me.

SPEAKER_01 0:28

Oh really?

SPEAKER_00 0:28

He doesn't look it now.

SPEAKER_01 0:30

He doesn't. I mean, he looked unbelievable, but also that shows how time quickly passes for us. I mean that movie.

SPEAKER_00 0:35

24, 24, 24, 25 years. 98 or something, wasn't it? 98, 99.

SPEAKER_01 0:40

And he was sorry, he'll be in late 30s, but yeah, he's in his 60s now, isn't he? But he's uh he's not aged like a gladiator.

SPEAKER_00 0:45

No, he enjoys his life as an Australian, as an Aussie.

SPEAKER_01 0:49

You weren't always a gladiator. Let's go back to the beginning and uh and uh let everybody know uh you know where life began and how we got to where

Losing His Father And Trust

SPEAKER_01 0:56

we are today.

SPEAKER_00 0:56

It began in Iran. Uh I was three and a half when my father died. He was 29 years old, my mum was 23, my sister was 30 days old. They didn't tell me for a year.

SPEAKER_01 1:07

They didn't tell you he died, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:09

So for one year, because they they've they didn't they weren't educated, they just thought let's avoid the pain for the kid. So every day I used to sit outside my house waiting for my dad to come because then he'd gone on business, and then um actually it's funny enough, I hadn't shared that with anyone till now. So um so I used to sit out outside the house every single day waiting for my dad to come, and then one night they dress me up and we go to this place, and I'm sitting and everybody's crying. And my granddad was there, he'd taken custody of me. I said, Why is everybody crying? He goes, Because there's your dad, he's dead.

SPEAKER_01 1:47

Just like that.

SPEAKER_00 1:48

Just like that. So something inside me thought that fuck, I can't even trust my family. Because even they can lie to you. I think that's something that still is in me, right?

SPEAKER_01 2:01

And you were four and a half, five.

SPEAKER_00 2:02

Four and a half, five years old.

SPEAKER_01 2:04

Do you do you remember this still to this day?

SPEAKER_00 2:06

Yes. I was sitting on his lap and everybody's crying, and there's a grave. I didn't know what a grave was, never been to one before. There's a picture on the wall, and then it was my dad. So it was his year anniversary. And then um two and a half, three years later, my grandfather died in front of me. He got up, he was burping, he had a bit of chest pain, went and had a shower, hot shower, which you are supposed to when you're having a heart attack, came and slept and never woke up. And then that day, they they took me up, picked me up, I'm thinking about seven and a half, seven, and then put me in a next-door neighbor and ignored me all day. So I can hear the screaming, the shouting, I look out, and my dad's been my granddad's been taken on a stretcher with a white sheet over him into an ambulance, and nobody even bothered. Because it was, they were just, you know, into their own world.

SPEAKER_01 2:55

Where was your emotion in this? I mean, just with your father, for example, were you sad missing him at this point? And then like a second question.

SPEAKER_00 3:02

I think it was a mix of emotions. I remember hating everyone for lying to me for so long. Because like, how can you be so how can my family lie to me for so long, right? Because I'll be where's that coming? He's on a business trip, he'll be here soon. I'm sure it'll be hurting, just didn't know how to deal with me as a child.

SPEAKER_01 3:20

And you say he was on a business trip. What was the financial situation for you back in those days?

SPEAKER_00 3:24

He was an entrepreneur, he was leveraged. But my granddad was rich, um, considerably rich, because he was the mayor of a city. Those times, before these mullahs came in, he was uh he worked for the Shah of Iran, the king of Iran. So, uh, and he was like an uh enforcer. So what happened is the king will say, Go to this town and uh destroy all the uh dodgy stuff that's going on and put law and order in place. So he'll go in. I remember him as this very authoritarian uh big guy, old man. We had two dark circles here because he used to pray all the time. He was a very religious man. He was very hard circles here because he used to touch the stone every day. And um he died and he was only 54, right? And I'm 58 now, and I'm like, oh my god, I also saw him as an old man, but he wasn't. So every few years the king will say, right, go to this town, go to this town, and he'll go and fix things. And when he died and the revolution came, they actually want to dig my because my granddad's buried on top of my dad, and they want to dig their grave up and turn him into toilets because he put all those religious guys in jail because they were stealing people's money. Uh, about 20 years ago, 18 years ago, I went to Iran to pay my respect to my grandma who was passing, and they said, Do you want to go to your dad's grave? I said, sure, I hadn't been. And when I turned up, 30 odd people turned up to see me. So who are they? They don't know me. They said they're saying respect to your granddad, because he changed their lives. And then when five and a half thousand people turned up at his funeral, and we'd found out later on that he was helping people and never telling anyone. He was paying people family education, and they all turned up. And I thought, God, that's my that's the legacy I want to leave behind.

SPEAKER_01 5:14

And back in those days, of you know, seven, eight, nine, ten, uh, where did you think the future lay for you?

SPEAKER_00 5:19

I didn't think actually anything. It was just more like um I didn't have a good childhood at all. They were so because of the emotional emotional, and also uh, if you imagine, my mom was in her twenties, right? And she had she was a beautiful woman, still is a beautiful woman. And um uh her she had lots of frustrations because of me and my sister. She couldn't really live her life. So I guess there's a lot of anger inside, and they take it out on someone, right? So I was the one that uh she took it out on. So it was like a lot of verbal abuse, lots of physical abuse. Um, I just couldn't wait to leave home because I knew there was something better and bigger outside. Um, but it was miserable. I wasn't allowed to play with my friends. Uh, be careful, this you're gonna get this, you know, something's gonna happen to you. Because they experienced so much sadness so early. Yeah, it was just scarcity mentality and miserable mentality. But I just thought, you know, I want to go out and play with the kids. I want to, no, no, be careful. They're not good kids. Be careful, you be careful, do that, do this. Just make sure you education goes, education, education. My aunt who brought me up with my mum and my grandma, she was a headmistress of a school. So it was all education. And I just didn't like education. I didn't like anything. And I was even as a kid, I was like, when is this gonna serve me? Yeah, I don't want to be a teacher, I wanna be this.

SPEAKER_01 6:42

How did you do with your results? I mean, were you somebody who like one of the kids doesn't like education and ignores it button? Barely passed. Barely passed.

SPEAKER_00 6:48

Not smart, no, not a smart kid, nothing, no interest in anything. Sports. I loved sports and music. As I got older, when I was really feeling miserable, I go into my room, lock the door, play music. So even now, um my my in solitude, I create music. I have a studio, I create music. So our event, I'm hoping you join us. I'll be there. All the music is mine. Oh, really? Yes. What would you play?

SPEAKER_01 7:16

How do you make it?

SPEAKER_00 7:17

I mix things. I have I have uh visions in my head. Being Iranian, I think, we're very good at hospitality. So I kind of I can see the emotions of the crowd before it happens. So I know how to turn the lights off, which music should come. We've got 71 entertainers and drummers. So I know exactly where they should enter, how the lights should go on, where the music should play, and it really moves people. Um, yeah, it creates create creativity, I think, is is my uh escape.

SPEAKER_01 7:49

And where did you think your career was gonna be back in these days? You wanted a creative hospital.

SPEAKER_00 7:53

I was fifth, 14, I went to my mom and said, How do people get jobs? Because I don't know, go and ask somebody else. I really didn't know, honestly, Matt. Uh I was I'm dyslexic, so I knew I was good with numbers, and people said, you know, you're a good talker, become a salesperson. So I knew I wasn't going into education. So uh I left

Moving To England And Surviving

SPEAKER_00 8:12

school at 15, uh actually 16, because I had took my A levels, got three O's, and um went into sales, got fired from so many. In Iran. In England. 78. I was 12, we went to England. Okay. I was bullied non-stop for two out two years. I was the first foreign kid at this school, couldn't speak a word of English.

SPEAKER_01 8:34

So I was gonna say, did you speak English?

SPEAKER_00 8:35

Not a word. And then that's why I I couldn't go home and complain to my mum because she was always miserable and depressed, right? I didn't want to add to a depression. She married uh my stepfather who was an alcoholic, and he was uh horrible, nasty creature, so I had it everywhere. So I wouldn't go home to complain, I'll just step up, right? So I thought I learned English without an accent. So people often can't tell that I'm a foreigner because if I I support Liverpool, right? But when I supported Liverpool in Iran, I'd say Liverpool, because it's spelled with an I, and they'll I'll get beaten up for that at school. So I thought, you know what, I've got to concentrate so much on my pronunciation so I don't get beaten up. Everything was survival rate.

SPEAKER_01 9:22

Why did your family move to England?

SPEAKER_00 9:24

Um, Prosper, do better. We went '77 to uh Brighton. We stayed there three months. We got back the year Elvis died. I remember I was like, who the hell's Elvis? And uh and then we got back to Iran. We went to do the same thing in 78. Revolution started, and we stayed. It was just it was mayhem. So we just stayed. It was the best thing ever. But then I looked back then, I was like, God, my mom was 31.

SPEAKER_01 9:48

Nothing.

SPEAKER_00 9:49

You know, really nothing.

SPEAKER_01 9:51

So, teenager, you finished your O levels, you didn't do very well. Did you stand for A levels?

SPEAKER_00 9:55

I did my A levels, but I didn't show up. Okay, so I went through the process and I sky for a year. Um no other is just lazy, really. I I used to be a squash player. So I used to play two, three games of squash, game of football every single day.

SPEAKER_01 10:09

Every day?

SPEAKER_00 10:10

Every day, every day. Uh I was number one in my uh town, but not because I was any particular good. I should have been coached, I could have been international. But I had a like they used to call me the tiger. I never quit, and I used to bounce off walls and I never stopped running. So I think that not quitting is something that uh still stays with me. Um, but then I reached a limit whereby uh younger people were beating me because I was coached, right? And I had too many bad habits. So yeah, I went to uh my mum caught me not going for a year, so to a piece that I went to college the last year, got three O's, and then retook them and got a couple of passes. But then I just went straight into sales, selling photocopias, fax machines, you name it, Kirby, vacuum cleaners, everything I sold it.

SPEAKER_01 10:58

The original sales training rounds. Yeah, I remember could could you sell could you sell? I mean, were you a natural salesperson at that point?

SPEAKER_00 11:04

No, no. Uh I just worked hard. So what I say now is that if you a shit salesman selling a shit product, if you knock on enough doors, some idiot will buy your product, right? So I just worked hard. When my friends or colleagues were in the pub, uh, I lived in Manchester, I was in Northampton knocking on doors on a Friday afternoon at six o'clock.

SPEAKER_01 11:25

But did you have anyone teaching? Because I mean, I mean, yeah, look, I'm with you.

SPEAKER_00 11:29

No one's ever taught me anything. It's always been self-taught. Then my ex-wife introduced me to Tony Robbins and into personal development, then I started reading. Before it was just hard work and learning, sitting in the car going, where did I go wrong with that one? How can I improve that one? And then I realized some of the shit that I did was actually being taught in America, right? Yeah, reading somebody's uh how to overcome objections. I just did it naturally.

SPEAKER_01 11:54

If you look back to then, what do you think a couple of the biggest um mistakes you were making in sales were that you had no one to coach you out of?

SPEAKER_00 12:04

I should be where I am now 20 years ago. So learning in my way cost me two heart attacks, loss of 100 million pounds, and 20 years of my life. Yeah, but then would I be so humble and live in gratitude if I had it too easy? You never know. But I'm always a seeker, and they said, you know, you're this and you're not. So I'm in work in progress. I'm still learning more than ever before, right? And also now we're a bit spoiled because before, if I want to learn anything, I had to either know someone who was rich and successful or go to the library. There was that one book somebody told me about. Now we can sit on the toilet, on the bus. All the information we need is in the tip of our hands, so uh fingers. So um, yeah, I can't wait to consume more information, learn more. Um, but those days it was tough. Was the Tony Robbins a big eye-opener to you? Do you know what it was? It was the case of from H the moment I found out my dad had passed, I was told it's your responsibility to take care of the family. It was that sense of responsibility that kept me going. I didn't think about the future, I thought I'd live forever. But one thing I did though, I I started counting. Like so by year 1990, I'll be so many days old. By year 2000, I'll be so many days old. If I live to be 76, I only have so many days left. So I was always very um uh very aware of time. So I didn't waste it. Okay, and I was always productive. I had to do something because I don't want to waste it. Because I've I've watched young people die in front of me and they had limited times, you know, limited lives. When I see people, it breaks my heart, and I'm thinking, well, you guys are walking around like you're gonna live forever, right? And you just don't know that you're gonna have regrets when you're old, that you just wasted your time. So it was just in me, and it was just like I have to provide, it wasn't about personal growth, so I had to earn money, and then I realized that it was my mom telling me I was no good, I was useless, this, this, this, uh, all the abuse. So I think inside of me it was like, fuck you, mom, I'm gonna show you. I'm gonna show you that I am not the useless person you say I am. Yes, I'm not gonna so I started being driven as a reaction of proving my mom wrong. Because whatever you say, even last week, um, she's a lie, so hopefully she's not gonna watch this. Even last week, I launched my book, it sold out in a day. My book sold out in a day, and I said, Hey mom, uh I was talking to you a couple of days ago, and she was going about how wonderful everybody else is. And I thought, you know what, I'll just throw something on in the in the pot. And I said, Mom, by the way, my book came out, and uh you sold out in a day. So who would buy your book? You know, not wow, amazing, and what's it about? Because immediately she's thinking, Am I in there? Are you with me? And I was like, Here we go. Never in my life I've ever had somebody who can literally get under my skin and say, Wow, I'm proud of you. You're amazing.

SPEAKER_01 15:07

How does that make you act as a parent? Did you ever worry about repeating that same process to your kids, or did it make you go the exact opposite way?

Anger, Violence And Learning Control

SPEAKER_00 15:17

I haven't been, I don't think I've been a perfect dad. Because you can never have perfection. Because I think I've there are many times I'm very I'm inside, even today, I'm a very angry guy. And there's that anger inside brewing.

SPEAKER_01 15:29

You seem so chilled and relaxed.

SPEAKER_00 15:30

Yeah, but then if if I snap, it's really dangerous. And it's calmed down over the years. But in England, I was in and out of jail.

SPEAKER_01 15:38

Oh, really?

SPEAKER_00 15:39

For beating people up all the time. So, and and I don't care if I lose an eye, get stabbed. I didn't care. When everybody goes red, it was something inside, I think it was just an anger coming out. As I get older, I'm like, the the the results of that anger, it's not gonna serve me well. You know, I I was in my 40s, sat in jail for beating somebody up. I was in my suit and my knuckles were all bleeding. I'm like, I've been here six hours because he used to put me in jail to calm me down. And um, I was thinking there's more to life, it's an embarrassment. Yes, that I'm sitting here as a business owner uh because somebody crossed me um uh behaving like this. I just made a decision to just curb it a little bit, right? I think in Dubai I've lost it three times. That's it.

SPEAKER_01 16:22

You've not been to a Dubai jail yet?

SPEAKER_00 16:25

Once.

SPEAKER_01 16:25

Oh really? Once. How do they compare to the UK once?

SPEAKER_00 16:30

It's really strange. If it's a UK, I'm claustrophobic. So in the UK, they put you in this and there's no there's no bar, uh there's no what do you call it? Metal bars. Yes, it's it's a green room you're locked in and with a metal toilet, right? And I get claustrophobic. So I I I want really I could die in there, and you're knocking, and everybody else is knocking, and don't answer the door, shitheads, right? So uh the British police. And I tell you why I say the British, because I had really bad experiences with the British police. Here, I went in and there's like 200 people in one big cell, and they have business cards, they're trading, and at midday, uh a person comes with a trolley and they get the cash out, the best sandwiches, and then at five o'clock.

SPEAKER_01 17:15

People have got cash in the jail.

SPEAKER_00 17:17

Yeah. I had my briefcase, internet, and my laptop working, and there was like locals there, accountants, lawyers, and they've been before. So they were telling me what to do. And and at 10 o'clock, somebody came in and said, mentioned my name, said not guilty. I said, Of course. You got my case. No, no, no, wait till your paperwork's done. So had the lunch at six o'clock, they come in, and then a gentleman came in with a list and he goes, Abdul, 20,000. So Abdul comes out, gives a 20,000, off he goes. Askar, 10,000. 10,000 in common went. I was like, this is a good business. Right? So they were ready with the fines. They're paid, and uh, I didn't get a fine, obviously I was not guilty and left. But um, yeah, it's totally different. But you know what? I liked it in a way that you don't, you're not effed, you know, like in a in when you got no views, no light, no anything, you can mess with your head, right? Over there, you're talking to people and and they still treat you with respect, right? I felt respected, although I was in jail in Dubai. Nobody knows about this. Well, all the exclusives. Do you know what happened? Do you know how I ended up with? Yeah, this is interesting. We had a client, we had a website company, and these clients were uh from Yemen, two uh dark ladies. There isn't I'm saying dark, they were black.

SPEAKER_01 18:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 18:38

And I was in England, my wife was giving birth to our second child. So I'm in a really good place. And I hear these two ladies come in and started abusing the black employees of mine. It just like didn't make sense, right? And they threw bottles of water at them and everything.

SPEAKER_01 18:53

What in the office?

SPEAKER_00 18:54

In the office. And no reason, these are the nicest guys, and they were supposed to come at five, they came at eight in the evening, my staff stayed behind. You know, I was hearing about this and great, great service. Well, obviously, they had issues. So I send them a message and I said, uh, please, there's a full refund waiting for you, and we'll give you all the codes. We don't want this energy. They didn't like it, they felt rejected. So they go to my bank and they say, This guy's this company's dodgy, and da-da-da-da-da. So the bank manager phones me up and said, What's wrong with these two women? They're a bit wild. So I sent them a text message saying, Um, Mrs. So-and-so, we're giving you a full refund. We give you a code. You haven't lost anything, you've gained. You can take on take a website somewhere else, and they'll give you a full refund. I'dn't I never bitch behind anybody's back. So please don't talk behind our back wrongly. And I sent it.

SPEAKER_01 19:41

That's a threat. They take that like a threat, don't they?

SPEAKER_00 19:43

So I get in and the police call me and say, Can you come? And I knew it was about them. So I go in with a whole file of our conversations, everything to show that everything's okay and they got their money back. And I sat there in the police station and the guy pulls out this piece of paper with the word bitch circled. And I said, I don't bitch behind people's back. But they took the word bitch, translated it in a female, yeah, female dog. You call them a female dog. So I had to 18 months, I was in and out of court, and my lawyer was saying, You could, you know, if you're found guilty, they're gonna pack your bags and send you home. And I just built a business for myself, you know, for uh for the final time. So there's lots of uncertainty. And this particular day, I I've been like, they didn't not once they turn up in court. So I've been there like 10 times, ruining my life. Yes, not once they were on holidays, they're chilling out, and and then nine times you got adjourned. The tenth time I went thinking it's gonna get adjourned, and they go, Can you sit over there? I said, Yes, all right. And then took me downstairs to jail. Yeah, so for 12, 13 hours until they came in at 10 and not guilty. I thought, let's get me out. This no, no, sit down till 6, 7 p.m. I was there. Uh, and then he found not guilty, and that was the end of that.

SPEAKER_01 20:58

And you never heard from them again?

SPEAKER_00 20:59

Never heard from him again. But then I had it was costly, and of course, the worrying because our kids are at school, and here, if you're found guilty, you pack your bags, your passport, you go back. I had kids at school and business and so there was a lot of uncertainty that I didn't appreciate. So um I tried to be very careful. I don't text anything to anyone anymore, right? Even if it's because it could be trans. I had three international translators saying I don't bitch behind people's back. It's an English terminology. You're not saying you're a bitch. And even to the last day, I was like, how's this gonna end?

SPEAKER_01 21:34

So you're in your 20s, you

First Companies And Big Growth

SPEAKER_01 21:36

you're doing the selling. Were you selling for yourself or for other people?

SPEAKER_00 21:39

No, um what happened was uh what was my first company? It was computers, so PCs just come in, and because before uh it was all big rooms of servers, and I saw an opportunity that oh my god, we can take these servers down into desktop machines, and I met someone who was an engineer. And we started putting little desktop machines together, and I went knocking on doors, and it did really well.

SPEAKER_01 22:05

And then we we were first before Dell came to I was gonna say it's this circa 1990 kind of time. Yeah, the reason I say that anyone who's born from 2000 onwards or even from kind of 1990 was to their computer experiences will just be walking into the shop and buying a computer or particularly you know what you know ordering a Mac online or something now. But back in those late 80s, early 90s, I mean that was like being a computer builder was was big business. It was like exciting, wasn't it? It was like a like the pick and mixed. The slots, I mean the soundboards, I mean this memory slit. This graphics card, yeah, yeah. Remember it.

SPEAKER_00 22:42

Graphics cards, yeah. Uh three and a half inch, five and a half inch disc drives. So um, yeah, but our returns rates were very high because I didn't know what the hell they were doing, right? I just had a production line and I was selling, but 50% of our computers kept back, come back in the first three months. Um so I had other things that I learned from those experiences. And then um photocopiers I got into, and then I met my second wife. She was a beauty therapist, and I was doing okay, but I knew this. Oh, and also very interestingly, after a couple of years, people didn't respect you as a computer assembler like they did two, three years before, because everybody was doing it. Yeah, it's like when social media comes out, you're a social media manager. Wow! Before you know it, every Tom Dick and Harry does social media management, right? So I felt like nobody was giving me the credit that I deserve, so I need to get out. I met my second wife, she's a beauty therapist, and I went to a beauty show, and first thing I said to the woman who was selling this product, I said, What's your USB? And she goes, Well, it smells good, the box is nice, colors. I was like, that's not good enough. What's the benefits, right? And nobody knew. So I said to my uh wife at the time, Michelle, I said, I think I can do quite well in this industry. So we flew to America, we got a couple of products that they were very results-oriented rather than stick it on a smells good, peels, the skin peels. Um, and then they did very well. We kind of like saturated the UK, saturated Europe, really did well. And then I quit the computer business. But at the same time, she had a beauty salon above a post office. But then out-of-town David Lloyd centers, yeah, they were doing really well. I said to her, we should have an out-of-town health club. She goes, try it. So I went and got a lease, one, and in the first year we got like 10,000 customers go through, but nobody became a member. All right. And I was like, look, I've had 10,000. Okay, I haven't been able to keep them. There are a lot of people coming and going and not becoming members. I need you because you're a farmer, I'm a hunter, right? So after a year, she joined and it just took off. Then we had seven. Uh in over 17 years, we had seven clubs, 30,000 members, 600 staff, and they were doing really well.

SPEAKER_01 25:01

So it sounds like there's uh that there's a next bit in the story that they were doing. They were doing really well. Yeah. What happened?

SPEAKER_00 25:07

Um, we got divorced. Uh we had properties and stuff in Dubai. She came here, she met a man, uh, fell in love after our divorce, and I said, stay, I'll look after the kids. So I got some marketing. I had a couple of other companies then. One was called 3D kids. I don't know if you've seen his glass blocks with 3D images inside them.

SPEAKER_01 25:27

I think I know what you mean.

SPEAKER_00 25:28

Like they burn holes in his glass blocks. Absolutely, yeah. And um, I was at Dubai Airport. I became a I met my second wife then, but I was really a single dad. I inherited

Franchise Gone Wrong And Home Invasion

SPEAKER_00 25:40

my first two children. And um they were at the Dubai airport, and they said, Dad, look at these crystal blocks. And they had the images done 3D inside the glass. I was like, wow, I can keep this forever. This is incredible because photographs are 2D. It's 3D, I can keep this. As I sat there for a couple of hours, the machine was never used. I'm like, this is really clever, but why is it not used? And they're paying all that rent. So on the flight back, I'll do a business plan. I said, the problem is that they're not going to the schools where the client, the customers are. They're sitting and hoping that somebody stops by. So I wrote a business plan, contacted a manufacturer, bought a machine, and got cameras all over the UK. And within six months, I was in every single kindergarten.

SPEAKER_01 26:21

Oh, really?

SPEAKER_00 26:22

Yeah. And I saturated the market uh with 3D kids. I ran out of money. The machine that could only print like 12 blocks an hour couldn't print anymore. It was 120,000 euros. The cameras were 20,000 euros, so I ran out of cash. So I thought, oh, franchising. So I got myself six franchises in a very short period of time. One of them was from Liverpool. The guy was dodgy and he would um like pay me cash. Uh, he said, don't email me, don't message me, call me. You know, all the signs were there. And I was just so busy, I didn't see it. And I knew the guy must have been touched, it has nothing to do with me, whatever he does with his money. One night at a house, there was a knock on the door. I opened the door, him and three other men broke into my house. And my kids are in the house, and they put a knife to my neck, uh, demanding money. And I said, I don't have it. I said, When we know where your company is, we know your kids' school, and if you don't give it, we'll kill you all. So that night I sent my kids to Dubai because I was scared for the safety. Uh-huh. Uh, and I got a police escort, packed my Q7, and I drove because I had three properties in Spain. My Angela, my second wife, wasn't my wife at the time, she was in Spain, and I drove through England, Tunnel, France, Spain in 48 hours.

SPEAKER_01 27:42

Where in England were you in the Manchester?

SPEAKER_00 27:45

Cheshire, Cheshire, South Manchester. And my next door neighbours are Wayne Rooney, David Beckham, uh uh yeah, all these footballers. But I was targeted, and it was when I found the police that found his fingerprints on my doorbelt, my address in his car. He was arrested. Now, this is what pisses me off because they pleaded with the police guilty. He gave two assailants, him and somebody else. He didn't even give them the other two names, and they did a deal. I had to go to court, sit in front of them, and they did a deal behind the scenes. Six months house arrest. So they only got a tag. Oh, is that what they call them? Tag or something around the ankle. So when I came here, long story short, I had a heart attack. I was very honest. I told people the stress of it all.

SPEAKER_01 28:31

You had the heart attack here or back in England in England.

SPEAKER_00 28:33

I was about to fly to one of my businesses in Canada, had this pain, phoned up my first wife. I said, Listen, I've got this pain. And the kids by this time were in Dubai. She goes, Whatever you do on the way within Show Hospital, go and check it out. I went in and said, You had a major heart attack. So, and I was there, they said, You're probably gonna die, it's not good. And um, I was lying there and I was thinking, okay, if it's death, fuck it, it's gonna come to us all. But I couldn't stop crying because I was on my own man, right? And I thought, if I survive this, I want to be with my loved ones. So I want to take my new wife and take her uh to to Dubai to be with my kids. And I was very honest. I told everyone I had buyers for the business, and they paid me 10%, they didn't pay me the 90%. They said, sue us, fuck you, sue us. Right? And uh if I was gonna sue them, it would have taken years. I went to Spain, did a house sale, left the keys on the kitchen top, and walked away with doors wide open. My house is in Spain. Came to Dubai, taxman came after me, the bank came after me, paid everybody off. And then um the reason the new buyers gazumped me, they didn't know, I was very honest to say September then 2000, I've bought the ticket, I'm going to Dubai. So they took advantage. But at the same time, I had a dispute with a VAT in England for 30,000 pounds.

SPEAKER_01 29:56

This is on the kids' business, on the 3D kids business. No, no, that was a long that was going.

SPEAKER_00 30:02

It was the health clubs, and uh yeah, the health clubs were always the flagbird, they were the biggest, right? And um what was the brand? Yurveda, U-R-V-E-D-A, after Aeroveda, Aerovedic treatments. Okay. So I took the A off. I've got stories to tell you on that side. It's really, really you know, they say like it never it never rains, it pours. That year was a bad year. And I remember I was really, really down, and then Michael Jackson died. It's really weird. So so I go, I sat in a park and I couldn't stop crying. I was like, what the hell? And Michael Jackson was died, you know. It was like, because I grew up in Michael, it's really weird. Everything was just magnified and it was raining, and it was just like, what is this about? So I couldn't wait to come to Dubai and start again. So what happened was if the if you you're in a dispute with a government body like the VAT or tax, it's an old English law. I didn't know this. They have to announce it in the London Gazette. So as soon as it goes in the London Gazette, the lawyers of my purchase of my business saw it. So said, let's screw this guy. I had in one of my accounts at 750,000 pounds. The dispute was 30,000 pounds. That account still frozen in the Royal Bank of Scotland. Can you believe it? And they were coming after me for the loan payment. I said, but the 700 and odd,000 sitting in that account, pay us our loan payment. It was just like weird, you know, it was like from every angle it was coming at me.

SPEAKER_01 31:31

Did you ever settle that case?

SPEAKER_00 31:33

Yeah, because what happened was I couldn't trade. The bank account was frozen. I was trading cash. So we were getting our customers to pay cash from the cash. I was paying salaries, rent, this, this. It was just too much. And also, staff started thinking, what the hell's going on? Right?

Heart Attack And Financial Collapse

SPEAKER_00 31:48

So I just I just walked. I just done. I burned my boats and paid everybody off, didn't go bankrupt. I wish I had done, because I could have walked away with something, right? I came here with $700 in my pocket, totally broken. You had no money when you were arriving by nothing, totally goosed.

SPEAKER_01 32:05

And how and how did you feel at that point?

SPEAKER_00 32:07

Because I mean I guess I just come out of a heart attack. So um my ex-wife had an apartment and she had a maid's room. So I said to her, Do you mind if I live in a maid's room? She goes, No, you can have your own bedrooms. No, I this is my punishment. Because I felt I've let people down. And for literally for a week, I never got out of bed. Because I was just recovering and uh started knocking on doors, uh selling everything you could imagine.

SPEAKER_01 32:33

How long ago is this now? What you're doing?

SPEAKER_00 32:35

2009. And then uh I just knew, Matt, I was just going through a fucking bad winter of my life. Because I knew I was a good human being, I knew I worked hard, I know if you do great things, eventually good things will happen. I just had this inner belief. Everybody gave up on me. Everyone. You're a loser, you're this, that, that. I just had this inner belief that if I work hard enough monetarily, things will happen. Because I've always been a decent human being. Yes, I always want to serve, but I just I was just going through a cold winter.

SPEAKER_01 33:08

And when did it change? What was the uh what was the first good business success in Dubai?

Rebuilding In Dubai Through Sales

SPEAKER_00 33:13

My first deal. Um, because I was going in saying, now what happens is I've I teach this stuff now, okay? And before 2009, everything was booming. So it was for I called myself sales consultant because I've been selling all my life, right? So I thought I can add value to some company out there. But when you go in and they're all making money because they have a business card and everybody's going to Dubai, they're not gonna who needs a consultant, right? But the good thing was opportunity came when the recession hit. Suddenly people weren't making money, suddenly the phone wasn't ringing. So I'll go in and say, What's your USB? They didn't have a clue. I said, if I can increase your sales by this amount, would you give me a percentage of that increase? And that's how I made my money. So I go in, I train the salespeople, I had a recruitment program that I used in my own companies. I brought that here, a seven-step recruitment process. People found it amazing. So I charged $7,000, which Durham's, which is about $2,000 per hour, and people started paying me. Got fully booked after six months, got my own place, the address, which is not too far away from here, got got a studio apartment and one bedroom. I had vision boards, I had cards everywhere reminding me what I had to do to get what I wanted. And every single goal I set I hit every six months. Literally, and I was like, then I thought I'm a fucking gladiator, right? Because I should be dead, I should be good, you know, like defeated, yes. But then you know what drove me mad was my kids looking at me because I couldn't afford to send them to school. So every day I come home, they were looking at me like dad, what's going on? I was so embarrassed to be to be their dad, right? And I thought I've got to get this out. So whenever I went, although I never had a peer group, uh nobody helping me, I always sat in an appointment thinking, if my 11-year-old son was here, would he be proud of me? And I made them my kind of like uh invisible judge, judges. And I thought, if they would be proud of me, I'm doing the right thing. And then I built it out and um I'm doing very well more than ever before.

SPEAKER_01 35:23

And you just used the word gladiator, then saying I'm a gladiator. Yeah. Was that the first time that you'd used that word to yourself? Has that been a a concept you've you've looked at through your life?

SPEAKER_00 35:34

I I always have an emotional attachment to Rome. I used to go and just sit in the Colosseum for hours. When people were getting tours, I was like, there would be I could see myself living in Rome. And I was like, I wasn't uh like an emperor or anything, but I felt like maybe in my past life I was some kind of I fought in this arena. Right? So I always had a history, especially Rome. Then I thought, hang on a second, we're all born, well, most of us are born poor in like financial slavery. Okay, and the more people we serve, the freer we become. Right? The only difference between 2,000 years ago and today is now we just dabble with life. If you dabbled in the arena, you get killed, right? Which one do I want? Do I want a quick death or do I want a prolonged, agonizing, slow death? So I thought, you know what? I want to go out there, I'm gonna, because I can't afford to walk out without a deal. Right? I want to walk into every battle, every meeting, like my life depended on it, like a gladiator. And I look around and I think it people get up in the morning, and the first thing the bank manager says, Don't worry, 80% of businesses go bus in the first year. And after that, 20%, 80% of that business goes bus. I'm like, you're building people for defeat every single day, right? You're conditioned to lose in life, you're conditioned to pay your taxes and die poor, right? So this was within me, and I always, one thing my mom taught me is never be jealous. And I always thought, even before I knew a personal development, was like, what's Matt doing that makes him fly first class? I need to copy what Matt's doing. You know, so I was always inspired by wealth. I was thinking, well, he's got two arms and legs, maybe he's got he's smarter than me, he's better looking than me, maybe stronger than me, but I can work it. Okay, so the questions I asked always gave me the answers. That makes sense. I was never I'm I don't have one ounce of jealousy in me. I'm very aware of that. But successful people in different areas really inspire me.

SPEAKER_01 37:33

And when did you start to um, I guess, serve others with the information that you'd been learning? I mean, I know you were doing it throughout your career, but uh you know, quite specifically, when did you start uh you know putting on events, building the gladiator brand, doing the podcast?

Creating Gladiator Mastery And Summits

SPEAKER_01 37:48

You know, is that a recent thing or or and was that part of a business model or just part of giving back?

SPEAKER_00 37:54

There's not one single time I've had a business model or a or a vision to go to a certain direction. Uh, seven years ago, one of my students, I've had, I've had a I had so many miracles in my life.

SPEAKER_01 38:05

We say students, like sales students.

SPEAKER_00 38:06

Sales students, yes, uh uh entrepreneur. He was in the events business and he said to me, Doris, you have a good story. Do you fancy sharing it? I said, sure. And it was 160 people in this uh event, and he gave me the last slot of the second day, dead man's slot. Everybody wants to go home. And uh so I was dead enthusiastic and gave me an hour. I was there three hours. And all the other speakers were pissed off because they're all professionals, right? And I'm there, and in the room, I think about 190 people were there. When I finished, there were more people in the room than when I started. People were because they could hear people crying, dancing, hugging each other. And somebody opened up a Facebook page and I got thousands of followers. And I was like, hello, that maybe my shit works, right? And then people called up and said, Would you speak? Would you do this? And I thought, you know, if I have this following, maybe I can hold a classroom of 20, 30 people in a room, they can pay me for what I teach them. Because selling my time, I'll never get rich. But if I have bigger and bigger rooms, yeah, I could get wealthier and for just one hour instead of one hour per person. So um it worked. And then I was doing seminars, my own classes called Gladiator Mastery, one weekend every two months. Hundred people, three thousand dollars a piece. But then nobody could sell the ticket price. So when there was a query about why I should pay $3,000, the call will come to me. And it was exhausting selling hundreds of tickets myself. And it's like you're a brain surgeon, yes, but then you run behind the counter, write the prescription, then you go to the till. I felt like those losers who pretended they were brain surgeons, experts scaling businesses. Well, I couldn't scale my own. So I stopped. May 2023 I stopped, exhausted. And my events were uh, when I say events, the maximum I had was 110 people. Uh two-day events, 8 a.m. till midnight, 8 a.m. till midnight, Saturday, Sunday. I used to get blisters in my feed, back A's.

SPEAKER_01 40:06

It's a long event that, huh?

SPEAKER_00 40:07

Yeah, and it was me, just me talking, right? And uh it was but feedback was really good. So I stopped May 2023. But then I just thought, screw this, I'm rich now, I don't need this, and then bookloads of holidays and trips and slides. But the phone kept ringing. You're saying, when is your next event? When are you gonna do? And I'm like, I'm not gonna do another one, I'm not gonna do another one. Then I thought, what was my pain? The pain was the ticket price was high. Well, I thought it was value, but selling it was on the phone. What if I drop the ticket price? So it's just somebody goes and pays online, they don't have to call me. What if I get the best venue in Dubai? What if instead of speaking for 24 hours, I'll call a few of my friends I met in my life. I feel they got a lot to contribute. Everybody said yes, they'll come and speak on my stage. Right? So at April the 27th, I had my first event. And I sat down with my poor staff and I said, hey guys, we've got this event going on. Um, it's gonna be called Gladiator Summit. What do you think? Okay, nobody really shares your vision. And then I said, look, guys, the worst nightmare for me is put this all up and nobody shows up. Right? That's him. I don't mind them. I've kissed the money goodbye, and we're not selling anything, right? So whatever happens, I'm gonna lose. Um, we're not selling anything, we don't have any sponsors, nothing. I just want to see if this gladiator movement has got any legs. We sold out in four or five weeks. And with five weeks to go, we were refusing tickets because our license in the room was limited to 500 people. We squeezed another hundred. Um, and then people were coming saying it's the best day of my life. This is incredible. They were hugging each other, event finished at 7, 9:30, 10 people weren't going home. And we were coming back to me, Dorish, when is your next one? I was like, I was still thinking of having another one. Uh, and I said, if you have another one, we'll bring our friends. So very next week, I drove to, I was I looked at venues, looked at the World Trade Center, popped two million derims down. I said, I'll take it for three days.

SPEAKER_01 42:03

How big is it?

SPEAKER_00 42:04

Two and a half thousand people. Already sold 1,500 tickets. It was five weeks to go. Amazing, right? And now my phone's ringing. World renowned, not particularly I like them or don't like them, I don't have an opinion, but world renowned speakers are speaking on my stage. Isn't that weird? Some of them are paying me that to speak. It's my second. And you know, when you they said why don't you hire an event manager or events company? Because nobody can see what you can see, right? If I feel if I hired an events company, it would have been just like other people's events.

SPEAKER_01 42:38

What's a typical uh attendee for you? I mean, is it is it all walks of the business life?

SPEAKER_00 42:43

All walks. The funny thing is, although one of my fears was because gladiators, people see these guys with six-pack killing each other, 65 to 70 percent of my followers or students are women. Because I feel in a white man's world, the women are catching up now, and they want to try harder, work harder to have their independence again, and they don't have much ego, they just want to achieve a goal, and they're more open to learning, they're more open to new ideas, to change. So, 70%. I mean, if you want to pick up women, come to one of my summits, right? Because I'm feeling this is a sales page. Yeah, I was thinking, if I was single, you know, it's incredible because um I'm honored, I really am honored that all these people are becoming part of the tribe. And I suffer from this um, what do you call it, imposter syndrome. So I asked my team, I said, You sold 1500 tickets, do a survey why people are coming. And over 50% are coming to hear me speak, and I'm here. Is that weird? I I honestly thought I wouldn't be even on the list. Uh it'd be Brad Lee's and Vishen and all. These people, there were two, three, four, five, six in a long distance. So I'm thinking maybe my message. Even today, I'm thinking I've got like six million followers on social media. And I was like, This actually means something. I'm changing lives.

SPEAKER_01 44:14

Darish, before we go, I've

Purpose, Legacy And Final Words

SPEAKER_01 44:16

got to ask you. Just before we started recording, uh, you kind of sat down, you're a bit like, oh, you know, I'm I'm tired, I'm grumpy. And you said, What do I do all this for? You know, I asked myself, what do I do all this for? You know, I could just give it up. So, what's the answer? You know, why why do you why do you do it? Why do you suffer the struggles and uh why why do you not just go and uh sit on a desert island and put your feet upon it?

SPEAKER_00 44:38

Okay, honestly tell you, mate, even when I tell you this, the hair stands on my eye. I don't have to work a day for the rest of my life. Okay, my past I earn more money when I'm on holiday than I'm in Dubai because Dubai I spend. When I'm on an all-inclusive, I'm not spending, I'm just earning. So I asked myself this question, and God or universe, I'll give you one example. I went to Babel Shams, same, took a weekend with a family, quality life, no phones ringing. I'm gonna stop this. God, why am I doing this? I get in these cards to go from the hotel to the restaurant, and the guy goes, Oh you, Mr. Dariush? So he goes, I lost my mother through two months ago, and my wife died a week after. Your your podcast and your videos keep me alive. I'm like, what the hell? And God just sends them to me at the at the weirdest times when I'm questioning myself. I get letters and emails saying you changed my life. And I'm like, this is God saying, don't give up. Yeah, because you are affecting people's lives. Because my legacy is what happened to my grandfather. That hopefully thousands of people will show up and say he changed our lives to my kids. And along the way, I've got 3,000 videos. So the next generations, hopefully, some of them will keep on the straight and narrow, knowing that their great-granddad was a good human being.

SPEAKER_01 45:59

Well, Darish, it's been an absolute pleasure to talk to you, buddy. I'm sure there's many, many more lives ahead that are going to be changed in the years to come. Uh, and I'm looking forward to being a part of it by coming to the event. So I can't wait. Thank you, Time. And uh, I look forward to talking again.

SPEAKER_00 46:12

Honor you, man. You didn't have to invite me to your podcast. You did. I thank you so much. Thanks, buddy. Pleasure.