{"version":"1.0.0","segments":[{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":0.54,"endTime":4.26,"body":"Hey, folks, Ned"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":0.54,"endTime":4.26,"body":"here, like me, you want your"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":4.26,"endTime":7.56,"body":"kids, your students, honestly,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":4.26,"endTime":7.56,"body":"all the young people you know,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":7.62,"endTime":12.48,"body":"to thrive, and you know how much"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":7.62,"endTime":12.48,"body":"you can help. But like me, you"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":12.48,"endTime":15.72,"body":"probably also recognize that you"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":12.48,"endTime":15.72,"body":"fall short more than you like"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":15.72,"endTime":20.06,"body":"to, in part, because we tend to"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":15.72,"endTime":20.06,"body":"refer to old ways. 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Full of reflections and"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":44.2,"endTime":48.28,"body":"exercises to do yourself, with"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":48.28,"endTime":51.28,"body":"your partner and with your"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":48.28,"endTime":51.28,"body":"children, we want to help make"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":51.28,"endTime":55.36,"body":"the self driven child way your"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":51.28,"endTime":55.36,"body":"way, so that you can, more often"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":55.36,"endTime":58.54,"body":"than not, be as effective as you"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":55.36,"endTime":58.54,"body":"want to be with your kids in"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":58.54,"endTime":62.7,"body":"ways that we know you want to be"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":58.54,"endTime":62.7,"body":"if you get a chance, order a"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":62.7,"endTime":66.96,"body":"copy bill, and I and your kids"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":62.7,"endTime":66.96,"body":"would be grateful."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":68.459,"endTime":70.979,"body":"My grandma was a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":68.459,"endTime":70.979,"body":"great painter, watercolor"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":70.979,"endTime":73.619,"body":"artist, and she taught me how to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":70.979,"endTime":73.619,"body":"paint early on, and I remember"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":73.619,"endTime":77.459,"body":"her taking me to the garden, and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":73.619,"endTime":77.459,"body":"we picked strawberries, and then"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":77.459,"endTime":80.359,"body":"we brought the strawberries in,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":77.459,"endTime":80.359,"body":"and then she filled her palette"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":80.359,"endTime":84.259,"body":"with, like, cardamon red, and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":80.359,"endTime":84.259,"body":"this little, you know, yellow,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":84.259,"endTime":86.659,"body":"and, like, all these different"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":84.259,"endTime":86.659,"body":"colors. 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We"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":105.159,"endTime":108.579,"body":"can do that with how we approach"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":105.159,"endTime":108.579,"body":"our children and not putting"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":108.579,"endTime":109.359,"body":"them in boxes."},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":109.719,"endTime":112.599,"body":"Welcome to the self"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":109.719,"endTime":112.599,"body":"driven child podcast. I'm your"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":112.599,"endTime":116.259,"body":"host, Ned Johnson and co author"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":112.599,"endTime":116.259,"body":"with Dr William sticks, of the"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":116.259,"endTime":119.979,"body":"books the self driven child the"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":116.259,"endTime":119.979,"body":"science and sense of giving your"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":119.979,"endTime":124.139,"body":"kids more control over their"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":119.979,"endTime":124.139,"body":"lives and what do you say? 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Is"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":134.039,"endTime":137.459,"body":"your mind occupied not with"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":137.459,"endTime":140.539,"body":"vacation reveries, but rather"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":137.459,"endTime":140.539,"body":"lists of all the things you need"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":140.539,"endTime":144.439,"body":"to do already wondering how you"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":140.539,"endTime":144.439,"body":"and your kids will get it all"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":144.439,"endTime":149.059,"body":"done. 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I'm Ned"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":164.559,"endTime":167.679,"body":"Johnson, and this is the self"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":164.559,"endTime":167.679,"body":"Tiffin child podcast."},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":173.74,"endTime":176.5,"body":"My guests today are Dr William"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":173.74,"endTime":176.5,"body":"stick shirt, my partner inscribe"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":176.5,"endTime":179.62,"body":"and someone wisely committed to"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":176.5,"endTime":179.62,"body":"spending as much of his life not"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":179.62,"endTime":184.2,"body":"wearing closed toed shoes as"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":179.62,"endTime":184.2,"body":"possible. And Dr Diana hill a"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":184.2,"endTime":188.64,"body":"source of great insights on how"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":184.2,"endTime":188.64,"body":"to use our energy wisely. She's"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":188.64,"endTime":190.98,"body":"a licensed clinical"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":188.64,"endTime":190.98,"body":"psychologist, international"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":190.98,"endTime":194.28,"body":"trainer and sought after speaker"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":190.98,"endTime":194.28,"body":"and leadership coach on wise"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":194.28,"endTime":198.54,"body":"effort and Acceptance and"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":194.28,"endTime":198.54,"body":"Commitment Therapy, AC T. She's"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":198.54,"endTime":201.26,"body":"also someone who, like many of"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":198.54,"endTime":201.26,"body":"us, spent years of her life"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":201.26,"endTime":204.14,"body":"running full speed to achieve"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":201.26,"endTime":204.14,"body":"but then experienced a crash and"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":204.14,"endTime":208.1,"body":"burn that even the most talented"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":204.14,"endTime":208.1,"body":"and driven people often do. Her"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":208.1,"endTime":212.42,"body":"new book offers this you and"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":208.1,"endTime":212.42,"body":"your kids don't have to choose"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":212.42,"endTime":217.4,"body":"between doing well and being"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":212.42,"endTime":217.4,"body":"well. Wise effort how to focus"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":217.4,"endTime":222.88,"body":"your genius energy on what"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":217.4,"endTime":222.88,"body":"matters most. Hi Diana, Hi Bill."},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":223.42,"endTime":227.44,"body":"Hi Dad. Hi. Good to be here,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":223.42,"endTime":227.44,"body":"sweet Bill and I are such huge"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":227.44,"endTime":230.44,"body":"fans of your work and grateful"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":227.44,"endTime":230.44,"body":"to you for having us twice on"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":230.44,"endTime":234.4,"body":"your previous podcast and once"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":230.44,"endTime":234.4,"body":"on your new podcast wise effort."},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":234.4,"endTime":237.4,"body":"So thanks for joining us and let"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":234.4,"endTime":237.4,"body":"us turn the tables on you a"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":237.4,"endTime":238.48,"body":"little bit well,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":238.48,"endTime":241.44,"body":"I am such a big fan"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":238.48,"endTime":241.44,"body":"of your work, mainly because"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":241.74,"endTime":245.4,"body":"your work is paying off. 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Wakes"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":258.24,"endTime":261.2,"body":"up, starts making crates."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":262.82,"endTime":263.84,"body":"Perfect illustration."},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":263.839,"endTime":267.679,"body":"Yeah, wow, that's"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":263.839,"endTime":267.679,"body":"delightful. In reading your book"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":267.679,"endTime":270.259,"body":"wise effort, it's clear that"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":267.679,"endTime":270.259,"body":"your work and your way of"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":270.259,"endTime":273.199,"body":"thinking and the advice to give"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":270.259,"endTime":273.199,"body":"to people is steeped in both A,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":273.199,"endTime":277.159,"body":"C, T and Buddhist principles,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":273.199,"endTime":277.159,"body":"just to kind of set the"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":277.159,"endTime":279.919,"body":"framework for folks who don't"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":277.159,"endTime":279.919,"body":"know those. Can you say a few"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":279.919,"endTime":283.239,"body":"words about how each of those"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":279.919,"endTime":283.239,"body":"work and what experiences kind"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":283.239,"endTime":284.619,"body":"of brought you to writing this"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":283.239,"endTime":284.619,"body":"book."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":285.159,"endTime":287.439,"body":"Well, both act and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":285.159,"endTime":287.439,"body":"Buddhist principles are"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":287.439,"endTime":290.259,"body":"mouthfuls, right? There's a lot"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":287.439,"endTime":290.259,"body":"to both of them. So I don't want"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":290.259,"endTime":293.199,"body":"to, you know, I don't want to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":290.259,"endTime":293.199,"body":"oversimplify, but act is an"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":293.199,"endTime":297.399,"body":"approach that was developed over"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":293.199,"endTime":297.399,"body":"40 years ago. There's been 1000s"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":297.399,"endTime":300.599,"body":"of randomized, controlled"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":297.399,"endTime":300.599,"body":"trials. It's a It's. Built on"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":300.599,"endTime":304.319,"body":"cognitive behavioral therapy,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":300.599,"endTime":304.319,"body":"but it integrates a little bit"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":304.319,"endTime":308.639,"body":"more of values based work and a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":304.319,"endTime":308.639,"body":"little bit more of acceptance"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":308.639,"endTime":313.199,"body":"based interventions. And it's"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":308.639,"endTime":313.199,"body":"not a protocol. It's not like"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":313.199,"endTime":317.099,"body":"you go through steps one through"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":313.199,"endTime":317.099,"body":"10. It's more an approach to a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":317.099,"endTime":319.739,"body":"way of being, and that way of"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":317.099,"endTime":319.739,"body":"being is something called"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":319.739,"endTime":323.599,"body":"psychologically flexible. And"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":319.739,"endTime":323.599,"body":"psychological flexibility turns"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":323.599,"endTime":326.839,"body":"out to be probably one of the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":323.599,"endTime":326.839,"body":"most important skills that you"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":326.839,"endTime":330.319,"body":"can have as a parent and as a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":326.839,"endTime":330.319,"body":"human. If you are more"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":330.319,"endTime":333.619,"body":"psychologically flexible, you're"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":330.319,"endTime":333.619,"body":"less likely to have stress spill"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":333.619,"endTime":337.819,"body":"out over onto your kids. You're"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":333.619,"endTime":337.819,"body":"more likely to have connected"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":338.119,"endTime":341.919,"body":"and enjoyable relationships with"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":338.119,"endTime":341.919,"body":"your kids, and then your own"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":341.919,"endTime":345.219,"body":"mental health is likely to be"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":341.919,"endTime":345.219,"body":"better off. So psychological"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":345.219,"endTime":349.239,"body":"flexibility is where it's at,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":345.219,"endTime":349.239,"body":"and that's the focus of Act. And"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":349.239,"endTime":353.319,"body":"then Buddhism, you know, I mean"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":349.239,"endTime":353.319,"body":"1000s of years of contemplative"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":353.319,"endTime":356.799,"body":"practice, it's still around and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":353.319,"endTime":356.799,"body":"seems to be also the secret"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":356.799,"endTime":358.959,"body":"sauce in a lot of our"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":356.799,"endTime":358.959,"body":"psychological interventions."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":358.959,"endTime":362.099,"body":"These days. 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They say things like,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":398.899,"endTime":401.739,"body":"Oh, I'm not a genius. What are"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":398.899,"endTime":401.739,"body":"you talking about, and I'm not"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":401.739,"endTime":406.719,"body":"talking about stamper Binet"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":401.739,"endTime":406.719,"body":"scores, or how somebody is an"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":406.719,"endTime":410.979,"body":"Einstein, but rather the talent,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":406.719,"endTime":410.979,"body":"strengths, emotional"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":410.979,"endTime":417.279,"body":"intelligence, what puts you in"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":410.979,"endTime":417.279,"body":"flow, what makes you you that if"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":417.279,"endTime":422.159,"body":"you direct it in a wise way,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":417.279,"endTime":422.159,"body":"sort of like the way you and Ned"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":422.219,"endTime":426.059,"body":"have done it, can really have a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":422.219,"endTime":426.059,"body":"beautiful impact on the world."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":426.119,"endTime":429.299,"body":"So I think the listeners could,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":426.119,"endTime":429.299,"body":"if they're big fans of yours,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":429.299,"endTime":431.159,"body":"I'm sure they are, if they're"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":429.299,"endTime":431.159,"body":"listening to this, they could"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":431.159,"endTime":434.459,"body":"say, oh, I know what Bill is a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":431.159,"endTime":434.459,"body":"genius at, and I know what Ned"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":434.459,"endTime":437.999,"body":"is a genius at, and it's not the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":434.459,"endTime":437.999,"body":"same thing, small overlap,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":438.66,"endTime":439.56,"body":"small overlap."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":441.959,"endTime":444.319,"body":"But a lot of"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":441.959,"endTime":444.319,"body":"difference, right? Like, what?"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":444.319,"endTime":447.139,"body":"What's your Genesis, qua, what's"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":444.319,"endTime":447.139,"body":"your mojo? What makes you tick?"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":447.139,"endTime":450.499,"body":"What do you light up around? And"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":447.139,"endTime":450.499,"body":"the listeners could also think"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":450.499,"endTime":453.559,"body":"about their kids. Maybe they"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":450.499,"endTime":453.559,"body":"have two kids or three or one"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":453.559,"endTime":455.599,"body":"kid, but they could say, oh,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":453.559,"endTime":455.599,"body":"yeah, you know my kid that's"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":455.599,"endTime":460.519,"body":"making crepes right now. He is a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":455.599,"endTime":460.519,"body":"problem solver. He's a creator."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":460.519,"endTime":463.839,"body":"He likes to make things with his"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":460.519,"endTime":463.839,"body":"hands. He's always been that"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":463.839,"endTime":468.939,"body":"way. He's a genius in the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":463.839,"endTime":468.939,"body":"kitchen. And when we channel"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":468.939,"endTime":472.599,"body":"that, when we honor that, when"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":468.939,"endTime":472.599,"body":"we direct that with values and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":472.599,"endTime":475.659,"body":"support it, then beautiful"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":472.599,"endTime":475.659,"body":"things will blossom from it,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":475.659,"endTime":480.359,"body":"like your work, right? What can"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":475.659,"endTime":480.359,"body":"happen with genius energy, with"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":480.359,"endTime":484.799,"body":"our kids or with ourselves, is"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":480.359,"endTime":484.799,"body":"that it can go underground. We"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":484.799,"endTime":487.079,"body":"can hide it. We can say, Oh,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":484.799,"endTime":487.079,"body":"this part of me, it's kind of"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":487.079,"endTime":490.019,"body":"me. My genius energy is"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":487.079,"endTime":490.019,"body":"emotional sensitivity. So for"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":490.019,"endTime":492.659,"body":"years, it was like, I need to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":490.019,"endTime":492.659,"body":"hide this part of me. I need to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":492.659,"endTime":496.139,"body":"shove it down. I need to put it"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":492.659,"endTime":496.139,"body":"away. I'm too sensitive with"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":496.139,"endTime":498.839,"body":"something that I heard a lot as"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":496.139,"endTime":498.839,"body":"a kid. Guess what? If you're"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":498.839,"endTime":502.459,"body":"emotionally sensitive, it really"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":498.839,"endTime":502.459,"body":"makes you an awesome therapist."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":504.439,"endTime":507.979,"body":"It's a great genius to have as a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":504.439,"endTime":507.979,"body":"therapist, right? Probably"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":507.979,"endTime":510.319,"body":"wouldn't have been my great"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":507.979,"endTime":510.319,"body":"thing for me, if I turned into"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":510.379,"endTime":513.739,"body":"an aer doctor, I would be like,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":510.379,"endTime":513.739,"body":"you know, crying on every table"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":513.739,"endTime":518.239,"body":"of every person that was"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":513.739,"endTime":518.239,"body":"struggling. So the the nature of"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":518.239,"endTime":521.379,"body":"genius energy is, is that it's"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":518.239,"endTime":521.379,"body":"not good or bad, it's just what"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":521.379,"endTime":525.099,"body":"makes you you. Often it develops"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":521.379,"endTime":525.099,"body":"from temperament, but it also"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":525.099,"endTime":528.819,"body":"can develop from life's"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":525.099,"endTime":528.819,"body":"hardships, and then our work, I"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":528.819,"endTime":532.479,"body":"think, as parents, is to spot it"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":528.819,"endTime":532.479,"body":"in our kids, help them see it in"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":532.479,"endTime":536.859,"body":"themselves, and then really"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":532.479,"endTime":536.859,"body":"nurture it and help them channel"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":536.859,"endTime":540.719,"body":"it like create really rich soil"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":536.859,"endTime":540.719,"body":"for it to grow into whatever"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":540.719,"endTime":541.919,"body":"it's going to grow into. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":540.719,"endTime":541.919,"body":"I'd"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":541.92,"endTime":543.72,"body":"love for you to"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":541.92,"endTime":543.72,"body":"talk a little bit more about"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":543.72,"endTime":546.9,"body":"that, because you have some"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":543.72,"endTime":546.9,"body":"really terrific exercises in the"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":546.9,"endTime":551.4,"body":"book about how we as adults can"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":546.9,"endTime":551.4,"body":"identify and pay attention to"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":551.4,"endTime":555.6,"body":"and honor our talents, character"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":551.4,"endTime":555.6,"body":"traits, all the things that are"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":555.6,"endTime":559.5,"body":"personal geniuses. But my"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":555.6,"endTime":559.5,"body":"observation is that,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":559.5,"endTime":564.2,"body":"particularly for kids in high"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":559.5,"endTime":564.2,"body":"achieving spaces, the idea of"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":564.2,"endTime":569.0,"body":"what matters, like what is true"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":564.2,"endTime":569.0,"body":"genius is really narrow. So it's"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":569.0,"endTime":572.78,"body":"your grades, your math, your"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":569.0,"endTime":572.78,"body":"English, maybe soccer and a few"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":573.02,"endTime":577.1,"body":"sports, right? But really,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":573.02,"endTime":577.1,"body":"really narrow sense of kind of"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":577.1,"endTime":580.6,"body":"what, what, what matters. And"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":577.1,"endTime":580.6,"body":"that a lot of kids, to your"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":580.6,"endTime":583.42,"body":"point about emotional"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":580.6,"endTime":583.42,"body":"sensitivity, there are a lot of"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":583.42,"endTime":586.66,"body":"things that kids that are that"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":583.42,"endTime":586.66,"body":"are skills or traits or"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":586.66,"endTime":590.74,"body":"geniuses, that one, they may not"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":586.66,"endTime":590.74,"body":"think matter because they don't"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":590.74,"endTime":594.64,"body":"show up on a test, and two, that"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":590.74,"endTime":594.64,"body":"they may poo poo because this,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":594.64,"endTime":597.88,"body":"well, that's not that big a"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":594.64,"endTime":597.88,"body":"deal. It's easy for everyone."},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":598.54,"endTime":601.02,"body":"With that said, are how. What"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":598.54,"endTime":601.02,"body":"are some of the ways that"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":601.02,"endTime":604.32,"body":"parents can help young people,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":601.02,"endTime":604.32,"body":"their children, pay attention,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":604.32,"endTime":608.94,"body":"take note of their skills, and"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":604.32,"endTime":608.94,"body":"have them not dismiss them or"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":608.94,"endTime":610.32,"body":"say, well, that's no big deal,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":608.94,"endTime":610.32,"body":"Mom,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":610.92,"endTime":613.56,"body":"I take my kids on"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":610.92,"endTime":613.56,"body":"retreat. This year, we went to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":614.1,"endTime":618.66,"body":"Deer Park monastery down in San"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":614.1,"endTime":618.66,"body":"Diego, and one of the practices"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":618.66,"endTime":623.48,"body":"that we do on retreat is a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":618.66,"endTime":623.48,"body":"practice of beginning anew. And"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":623.72,"endTime":626.36,"body":"in the practice of beginning"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":623.72,"endTime":626.36,"body":"anew, the children and their"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":626.36,"endTime":629.12,"body":"parents, teens and our and their"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":626.36,"endTime":629.12,"body":"parents in this setting, because"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":629.12,"endTime":632.72,"body":"we're teenagers now, sit in a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":629.12,"endTime":632.72,"body":"circle, and we start with"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":632.72,"endTime":636.56,"body":"turning to our family in front"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":632.72,"endTime":636.56,"body":"of the everyone in the circle."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":636.56,"endTime":639.56,"body":"So maybe there's 12 families in"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":636.56,"endTime":639.56,"body":"there, and we start with"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":639.56,"endTime":642.88,"body":"something called watering"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":639.56,"endTime":642.88,"body":"flowers. And watering flowers is"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":643.0,"endTime":646.66,"body":"a practice that Tai Thich Nhat"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":643.0,"endTime":646.66,"body":"Hanh taught, and he taught at"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":646.66,"endTime":648.82,"body":"first to the monastics to do to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":646.66,"endTime":648.82,"body":"each other, and now he's"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":648.82,"endTime":651.22,"body":"teaching us to do it as"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":648.82,"endTime":651.22,"body":"families. The way that you water"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":651.22,"endTime":655.12,"body":"flowers is you express"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":651.22,"endTime":655.12,"body":"appreciations for who the person"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":655.12,"endTime":660.1,"body":"is, not what they do. But what"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":655.12,"endTime":660.1,"body":"kind of flower are they? You"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":660.1,"endTime":662.52,"body":"know, I have a garden, I have"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":660.1,"endTime":662.52,"body":"sunflowers, and I have Zinnias,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":662.52,"endTime":665.64,"body":"and then I have a few little"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":662.52,"endTime":665.64,"body":"tiny blue flowers that are just"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":665.64,"endTime":668.28,"body":"little volunteers. And what do I"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":665.64,"endTime":668.28,"body":"appreciate about this little"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":668.28,"endTime":671.58,"body":"blue flower? How does it impact"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":668.28,"endTime":671.58,"body":"me? How does it impact our"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":671.58,"endTime":674.82,"body":"family? What do I see that's"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":671.58,"endTime":674.82,"body":"different about it? And when you"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":674.82,"endTime":677.88,"body":"water a flower, especially one"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":674.82,"endTime":677.88,"body":"that's growing, guess what"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":677.88,"endTime":683.72,"body":"happens? It grows stronger, it"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":677.88,"endTime":683.72,"body":"opens up. It perks up, right?"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":683.78,"endTime":687.38,"body":"It's able to receive the next"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":683.78,"endTime":687.38,"body":"part of beginning anew, which is"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":687.38,"endTime":691.04,"body":"actually we start to talk about,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":687.38,"endTime":691.04,"body":"here are some things that I'm"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":691.04,"endTime":696.74,"body":"hurting around, you know, and,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":691.04,"endTime":696.74,"body":"and so if we want to have kids"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":696.74,"endTime":699.56,"body":"that are resilient and strong"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":696.74,"endTime":699.56,"body":"and, you know, all the things"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":699.56,"endTime":702.4,"body":"How are gritty and whatever we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":699.56,"endTime":702.4,"body":"we need to do it more with our"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":702.4,"endTime":704.92,"body":"partners. We need to do it more"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":702.4,"endTime":704.92,"body":"with each other. I watered your"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":704.92,"endTime":707.62,"body":"flowers last time we met, I was"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":704.92,"endTime":707.62,"body":"like, let me tell you about you."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":707.62,"endTime":710.38,"body":"Bill all the things that I"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":707.62,"endTime":710.38,"body":"appreciate about you, and I saw"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":710.38,"endTime":712.54,"body":"you perk up. You remembered"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":710.38,"endTime":712.54,"body":"those things because sometimes"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":712.54,"endTime":715.12,"body":"it's hard to see our geniuses in"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":712.54,"endTime":715.12,"body":"ourselves. We don't see it, we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":715.12,"endTime":719.38,"body":"don't feel it. So day to day, we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":715.12,"endTime":719.38,"body":"water our children's flowers,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":719.38,"endTime":721.86,"body":"and we water the things that are"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":719.38,"endTime":721.86,"body":"truly, authentically, that we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":721.86,"endTime":726.24,"body":"see about them, not that society"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":721.86,"endTime":726.24,"body":"tells us we should be, you know,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":726.42,"endTime":730.74,"body":"rewarding. It's just, you know,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":726.42,"endTime":730.74,"body":"I walk in, my kid's making"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":730.74,"endTime":733.32,"body":"crepes, and he's wearing this"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":730.74,"endTime":733.32,"body":"little bathrobe, and he's just"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":733.32,"endTime":737.88,"body":"cheery as can be. And I say, I"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":733.32,"endTime":737.88,"body":"just love this about you. You"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":737.88,"endTime":740.54,"body":"wake up in the morning and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":737.88,"endTime":740.54,"body":"you're just like, pulling out"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":740.54,"endTime":744.02,"body":"the eggs. You're whipping them"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":740.54,"endTime":744.02,"body":"up. There's something about you"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":744.02,"endTime":749.18,"body":"that is so I could use the word"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":744.02,"endTime":749.18,"body":"self driven. And when you reward"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":749.18,"endTime":751.46,"body":"something like that, you"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":749.18,"endTime":751.46,"body":"appreciate it, strengthens it,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":751.46,"endTime":755.48,"body":"and it's more likely to happen"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":751.46,"endTime":755.48,"body":"again. So we can do that on a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":755.48,"endTime":758.54,"body":"day to day basis, and then we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":755.48,"endTime":758.54,"body":"can also think about our genius"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":758.54,"endTime":762.04,"body":"and our kids is also developing"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":758.54,"endTime":762.04,"body":"as interests are developing. I"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":762.04,"endTime":765.22,"body":"love the work of Cal Newport,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":762.04,"endTime":765.22,"body":"and he has a great book How to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":765.22,"endTime":767.92,"body":"be a high school superstar that"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":765.22,"endTime":767.92,"body":"I read with my eighth grader"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":767.92,"endTime":771.16,"body":"before he was starting high"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":767.92,"endTime":771.16,"body":"school. And in it, he talked"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":771.16,"endTime":776.2,"body":"about having enough space to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":771.16,"endTime":776.2,"body":"just explore interests. You"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":776.2,"endTime":779.5,"body":"know, a lot of our kids are on"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":776.2,"endTime":779.5,"body":"these super highways where we've"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":779.5,"endTime":782.22,"body":"taken them off the back roads,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":779.5,"endTime":782.22,"body":"and we put them on a highway to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":782.22,"endTime":786.12,"body":"college or a highway to this"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":782.22,"endTime":786.12,"body":"sport, or if you haven't played"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":786.12,"endTime":789.84,"body":"baseball by your by the time"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":786.12,"endTime":789.84,"body":"you're 12, you're out kid, no"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":789.84,"endTime":792.12,"body":"chance for you don't even get on"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":789.84,"endTime":792.12,"body":"that field, it'll be an"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":792.12,"endTime":794.64,"body":"embarrassment, because all these"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":792.12,"endTime":794.64,"body":"kids have been playing since"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":794.64,"endTime":797.46,"body":"they were six, right? What is"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":794.64,"endTime":797.46,"body":"going on there? What if the kid,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":797.52,"endTime":800.22,"body":"he had no idea, or she had no"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":797.52,"endTime":800.22,"body":"idea, that she liked baseball,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":800.88,"endTime":804.68,"body":"because she never got a chance,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":800.88,"endTime":804.68,"body":"right? So another aspect of"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":804.68,"endTime":808.34,"body":"exploring genius with your kids"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":804.68,"endTime":808.34,"body":"is really that it's still"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":808.34,"endTime":811.7,"body":"developing. Their interests are"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":808.34,"endTime":811.7,"body":"developing just like you keep on"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":811.7,"endTime":814.1,"body":"putting lots of variety of foods"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":811.7,"endTime":814.1,"body":"on their plate and keep on"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":814.1,"endTime":817.4,"body":"trying until you know, maybe"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":814.1,"endTime":817.4,"body":"they figure out what's what are"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":817.4,"endTime":820.36,"body":"their interests. Continue to do"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":817.4,"endTime":820.36,"body":"that for your kids, continue to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":820.36,"endTime":824.08,"body":"explore, continue to be open,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":820.36,"endTime":824.08,"body":"and don't channel them too soon"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":824.08,"endTime":827.62,"body":"into one super highway, because,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":824.08,"endTime":827.62,"body":"um, don't maybe miss out on"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":827.62,"endTime":830.38,"body":"something that they didn't know"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":827.62,"endTime":830.38,"body":"would put them in a space of"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":830.38,"endTime":830.68,"body":"flow."},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":831.28,"endTime":834.58,"body":"That's such great"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":831.28,"endTime":834.58,"body":"advice. Every, every kid that I"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":834.58,"endTime":837.76,"body":"test is neuropsychologist,"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":834.58,"endTime":837.76,"body":"every, every kid who's over 10"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":837.76,"endTime":841.8,"body":"or 11, I write out my own hand"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":837.76,"endTime":841.8,"body":"all the things they could do"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":841.8,"endTime":844.32,"body":"better than most people, and all"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":841.8,"endTime":844.32,"body":"the nice qualities that I"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":844.32,"endTime":846.6,"body":"observed with their parents."},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":844.32,"endTime":846.6,"body":"Told me about other teachers, I"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":846.6,"endTime":850.2,"body":"write it out, and the last kid I"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":846.6,"endTime":850.2,"body":"saw, I've written out for him a"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":850.2,"endTime":853.2,"body":"year ago. And the parents came"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":850.2,"endTime":853.2,"body":"in, they said, we have it framed"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":853.32,"endTime":857.76,"body":"in our house. And I just think"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":853.32,"endTime":857.76,"body":"that letting kids know that I"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":857.76,"endTime":860.9,"body":"appreciate this in you. And"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":857.76,"endTime":860.9,"body":"because so many kids that I see"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":861.2,"endTime":864.56,"body":"that figure, well, if I'm good"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":861.2,"endTime":864.56,"body":"at it, it must be easy. There"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":864.56,"endTime":867.8,"body":"must be everybody must be good"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":864.56,"endTime":867.8,"body":"at or there's somebody better in"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":867.8,"endTime":870.74,"body":"me that I'm there's, there's a"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":867.8,"endTime":870.74,"body":"class that's above me. I must"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":870.74,"endTime":874.34,"body":"not be good at this. And it's"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":870.74,"endTime":874.34,"body":"helping people really understand"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":874.7,"endTime":876.74,"body":"what they can bring to this"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":874.7,"endTime":876.74,"body":"world, what they have to offer"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":876.74,"endTime":880.16,"body":"this world. I just love this"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":876.74,"endTime":880.16,"body":"idea of genius energy, that this"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":880.16,"endTime":882.46,"body":"broader than just IQ, right?"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":882.94,"endTime":885.46,"body":"My grandma was a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":882.94,"endTime":885.46,"body":"great painter, watercolor"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":885.46,"endTime":888.04,"body":"artist, and she taught me how to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":885.46,"endTime":888.04,"body":"paint early on, and I remember"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":888.04,"endTime":892.0,"body":"her taking me to the garden, and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":888.04,"endTime":892.0,"body":"we picked strawberries, and then"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":892.0,"endTime":894.88,"body":"we brought the strawberries in,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":892.0,"endTime":894.88,"body":"and then she filled her palette"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":894.88,"endTime":898.48,"body":"with, like, cardamon red and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":894.88,"endTime":898.48,"body":"this little, you know, yellow,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":898.48,"endTime":900.72,"body":"and like all these different"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":898.48,"endTime":900.72,"body":"colors. Dollars. And then she"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":900.72,"endTime":904.68,"body":"mixed them all together, and she"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":900.72,"endTime":904.68,"body":"said, for this strawberry, I"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":904.68,"endTime":910.14,"body":"think it's this color, right? So"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":904.68,"endTime":910.14,"body":"with kids, we want to put them"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":910.14,"endTime":912.48,"body":"in these boxes. And I even"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":910.14,"endTime":912.48,"body":"hesitant. You know, when I talk"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":912.48,"endTime":915.36,"body":"about genius energy and wise"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":912.48,"endTime":915.36,"body":"effort, I talk about these five"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":915.36,"endTime":917.94,"body":"primary ways you can start to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":915.36,"endTime":917.94,"body":"explore it. What are your"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":917.94,"endTime":920.54,"body":"interests? You can take a test."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":917.94,"endTime":920.54,"body":"What are your character"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":920.54,"endTime":923.0,"body":"strengths. You can go on via.org"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":920.54,"endTime":923.0,"body":"and figure out what your"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":923.0,"endTime":925.7,"body":"character strengths are. What is"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":923.0,"endTime":925.7,"body":"your emotional intelligence?"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":925.7,"endTime":928.1,"body":"What is this kid's personality?"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":925.7,"endTime":928.1,"body":"More extroverted, more"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":928.1,"endTime":930.86,"body":"introverted, more ambiverted."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":928.1,"endTime":930.86,"body":"You know, there's all these"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":930.92,"endTime":935.06,"body":"boxes, like colors of the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":930.92,"endTime":935.06,"body":"palette, but your kid is like"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":935.06,"endTime":940.9,"body":"that strawberry. It's unique,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":935.06,"endTime":940.9,"body":"and there's no one color in any"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":940.9,"endTime":944.56,"body":"palette that is going to be your"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":940.9,"endTime":944.56,"body":"kid, and your job is to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":944.56,"endTime":948.76,"body":"appreciate the strawberry like"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":944.56,"endTime":948.76,"body":"see it, appreciate it, point it"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":948.76,"endTime":952.6,"body":"out. And that is what is going"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":948.76,"endTime":952.6,"body":"to feel so good to them. And"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":952.6,"endTime":956.14,"body":"also gives them freedom to have"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":952.6,"endTime":956.14,"body":"the ultimate goal, which is to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":956.14,"endTime":959.5,"body":"be themselves, to be one life. I"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":956.14,"endTime":959.5,"body":"just want to be myself. Can I"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":959.5,"endTime":962.7,"body":"just be me and and, and, you"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":959.5,"endTime":962.7,"body":"know, this is the kind of"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":962.7,"endTime":966.54,"body":"strawberry I am. So we can do"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":962.7,"endTime":966.54,"body":"that with how we approach our"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":966.54,"endTime":968.4,"body":"children and not putting them in"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":966.54,"endTime":968.4,"body":"boxes."},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":968.82,"endTime":971.88,"body":"Wise effort is lay"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":968.82,"endTime":971.88,"body":"down really kind of three big"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":972.06,"endTime":975.42,"body":"pieces of, kind of the three"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":972.06,"endTime":975.42,"body":"parts to foster our genius"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":975.48,"endTime":977.22,"body":"energy. Can you walk us through"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":975.48,"endTime":977.22,"body":"that?"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":977.22,"endTime":979.44,"body":"Kind of, yeah, well,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":977.22,"endTime":979.44,"body":"the first part is getting"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":979.44,"endTime":983.24,"body":"curious. So we know that"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":979.44,"endTime":983.24,"body":"curiosity is actually very"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":983.24,"endTime":987.02,"body":"rewarding, and the type of"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":983.24,"endTime":987.02,"body":"curiosity that we're talking"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":987.02,"endTime":990.68,"body":"about is questions that lead to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":987.02,"endTime":990.68,"body":"more questions, and we want to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":990.68,"endTime":993.14,"body":"just learn more. And when we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":990.68,"endTime":993.14,"body":"approach ourselves with"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":993.14,"endTime":996.5,"body":"curiosity, it helps us with the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":993.14,"endTime":996.5,"body":"tendency towards self judgment"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":996.5,"endTime":998.96,"body":"and self criticism and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":996.5,"endTime":998.96,"body":"comparison. That's not what"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":998.96,"endTime":1002.04,"body":"we're in the you know, work of"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":998.96,"endTime":1002.04,"body":"so we're getting curious about"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1002.04,"endTime":1005.76,"body":"what is our genius, but then we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1002.04,"endTime":1005.76,"body":"also get curious about, how is"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1005.76,"endTime":1009.18,"body":"our genius our problem? How has"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1005.76,"endTime":1009.18,"body":"our genius gotten ourselves"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1009.18,"endTime":1013.74,"body":"sometimes off track? So the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1009.18,"endTime":1013.74,"body":"person that is great at problem"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1013.74,"endTime":1016.98,"body":"solving, their genius can be"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1013.74,"endTime":1016.98,"body":"their problem if all of a sudden"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1016.98,"endTime":1022.28,"body":"they're trying to problem solve"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1016.98,"endTime":1022.28,"body":"their wife, right? The person"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1022.28,"endTime":1024.92,"body":"who's a genius at making"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1022.28,"endTime":1024.92,"body":"everything light and humorous,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1025.16,"endTime":1028.4,"body":"that genius can become a problem"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1025.16,"endTime":1028.4,"body":"if you're making everything"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1028.4,"endTime":1030.8,"body":"light and humorous, and you're"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1028.4,"endTime":1030.8,"body":"never actually really feeling"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1030.8,"endTime":1034.4,"body":"the depth of sadness or the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1030.8,"endTime":1034.4,"body":"complexity, and you're just"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1034.4,"endTime":1038.18,"body":"using it to avoid your emotional"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1034.4,"endTime":1038.18,"body":"sensitivity, in my case, can"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1038.18,"endTime":1041.44,"body":"become a problem as you could"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1038.18,"endTime":1041.44,"body":"imagine. You know, if you're"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1041.56,"endTime":1044.5,"body":"taking you're so poor as you're"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1041.56,"endTime":1044.5,"body":"taking in everybody's stuff, and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1044.5,"endTime":1047.62,"body":"you're not able to, you know,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1044.5,"endTime":1047.62,"body":"sort of protect yourself from"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1047.62,"endTime":1051.04,"body":"that. So I do a bit on how your"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1047.62,"endTime":1051.04,"body":"genius becomes a problem. And we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1051.04,"endTime":1054.16,"body":"get curious in sort of the three"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1051.04,"endTime":1054.16,"body":"primary ways that I really draw"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1054.16,"endTime":1056.92,"body":"from act, from the science of"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1054.16,"endTime":1056.92,"body":"psychology, as well as"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1056.92,"endTime":1060.48,"body":"contemplative practice, that"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1056.92,"endTime":1060.48,"body":"lead us to our genius becoming a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1060.48,"endTime":1063.84,"body":"problem, which are we get stuck"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1060.48,"endTime":1063.84,"body":"in a story. We hold on too"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1063.84,"endTime":1066.72,"body":"tight, and we're avoiding"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1063.84,"endTime":1066.72,"body":"discomfort. So that's the first"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1066.72,"endTime":1069.48,"body":"part. And we get curious about"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1066.72,"endTime":1069.48,"body":"our values, a lot of curiosity,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1069.48,"endTime":1072.18,"body":"a lot of questions. That whole"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1069.48,"endTime":1072.18,"body":"part of the book is just open"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1072.18,"endTime":1075.3,"body":"questions, questions, questions,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1072.18,"endTime":1075.3,"body":"questions. And then the second"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1075.3,"endTime":1079.38,"body":"step is about opening up and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1075.3,"endTime":1079.38,"body":"opening up our minds, opening up"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1079.38,"endTime":1082.52,"body":"to feeling, opening up our sense"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1079.38,"endTime":1082.52,"body":"of self and opening up to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1082.52,"endTime":1085.82,"body":"change. And then the third step"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1082.52,"endTime":1085.82,"body":"is about focusing our energy."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1086.0,"endTime":1088.7,"body":"How do we want to focus it more"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1086.0,"endTime":1088.7,"body":"wisely? You talked about summer"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1088.7,"endTime":1092.3,"body":"coming to an end, school"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1088.7,"endTime":1092.3,"body":"starting. There's a menu of"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1092.3,"endTime":1097.58,"body":"options. How do you choose? And"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1092.3,"endTime":1097.58,"body":"part of that has to do with what"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1097.58,"endTime":1101.2,"body":"is your genius? What are your"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1097.58,"endTime":1101.2,"body":"values? Where do you want to put"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1101.2,"endTime":1105.58,"body":"your energy, and are you willing"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1101.2,"endTime":1105.58,"body":"to experience the feeling of"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1105.58,"endTime":1109.66,"body":"letting something go in the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1105.58,"endTime":1109.66,"body":"service of living more"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1109.66,"endTime":1113.26,"body":"effectively and more values"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1109.66,"endTime":1113.26,"body":"driven? There is loss in"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1113.26,"endTime":1116.44,"body":"focusing. There's loss in"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1113.26,"endTime":1116.44,"body":"choosing, and we actually need"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1116.44,"endTime":1119.26,"body":"to get better at experience that"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1116.44,"endTime":1119.26,"body":"loss because our plates are too"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1119.26,"endTime":1123.84,"body":"full. We're unwilling to say no,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1119.26,"endTime":1123.84,"body":"and then we suffer the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1123.84,"endTime":1127.62,"body":"consequences of our too many"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1123.84,"endTime":1127.62,"body":"yeses, and we complain about it."},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1129.66,"endTime":1131.04,"body":"This is hitting"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1129.66,"endTime":1131.04,"body":"close to home,"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1131.04,"endTime":1134.94,"body":"yeah for both of"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1131.04,"endTime":1134.94,"body":"us, probably, yeah. You know,"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1135.0,"endTime":1139.08,"body":"Diana, you talk about the"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1135.0,"endTime":1139.08,"body":"importance of flexibility,"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1139.08,"endTime":1142.52,"body":"psychological flexibility, and"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1139.08,"endTime":1142.52,"body":"about things that can support"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1142.52,"endTime":1145.1,"body":"that kind of development,"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1142.52,"endTime":1145.1,"body":"flexibility and things that"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1145.1,"endTime":1148.04,"body":"don't. Can you talk a little bit"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1145.1,"endTime":1148.04,"body":"about why flexibility is so"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1148.04,"endTime":1150.8,"body":"important. I mean, you mentioned"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1148.04,"endTime":1150.8,"body":"it a little earlier, but tell us"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1150.8,"endTime":1153.86,"body":"a little bit more about why it's"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1150.8,"endTime":1153.86,"body":"so important and what parents"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1153.86,"endTime":1157.34,"body":"can do to support their kids,"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1153.86,"endTime":1157.34,"body":"including neurodivergent kids,"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1157.34,"endTime":1161.2,"body":"who might necessarily be as"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1157.34,"endTime":1161.2,"body":"flexible as most people."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1161.38,"endTime":1165.34,"body":"Yeah. Well,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1161.38,"endTime":1165.34,"body":"psychological flexibility is"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1165.34,"endTime":1169.84,"body":"important, in part, because"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1165.34,"endTime":1169.84,"body":"everything is always changing."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1171.04,"endTime":1175.36,"body":"So if you are inflexible and you"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1171.04,"endTime":1175.36,"body":"are holding on too tight, and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1175.36,"endTime":1178.48,"body":"things are changing right, so"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1175.36,"endTime":1178.48,"body":"you're holding onto a rope"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1178.48,"endTime":1181.5,"body":"that's moving, you're going to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1178.48,"endTime":1181.5,"body":"get rope burn, right? So we want"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1181.56,"endTime":1186.78,"body":"to be adaptable. The one"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1181.56,"endTime":1186.78,"body":"guarantee about life is that we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1186.78,"endTime":1190.02,"body":"are in a constant state of flow"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1186.78,"endTime":1190.02,"body":"and change. We don't we want our"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1190.02,"endTime":1194.4,"body":"kids to be able to know how to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1190.02,"endTime":1194.4,"body":"adapt. I just want to we just"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1194.46,"endTime":1198.24,"body":"this end of our summer trip, I"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1194.46,"endTime":1198.24,"body":"was taking my son up to Canada"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1198.48,"endTime":1202.04,"body":"to see my good friend. End up"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1198.48,"endTime":1202.04,"body":"there. Who's she is a world"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1202.04,"endTime":1207.62,"body":"champion mountain biker, which"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1202.04,"endTime":1207.62,"body":"is terrible. My son is a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1207.62,"endTime":1210.86,"body":"mountain biker, which is rad."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1207.62,"endTime":1210.86,"body":"And he's 15 year old, and I"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1210.86,"endTime":1213.92,"body":"barely get any time with him."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1210.86,"endTime":1213.92,"body":"And this was our end of the year"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1213.92,"endTime":1217.82,"body":"trip, and we get on the plane to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1213.92,"endTime":1217.82,"body":"go to Canada, and I had three"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1217.82,"endTime":1219.98,"body":"days with my son, so I've been"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1217.82,"endTime":1219.98,"body":"looking forward to this all"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1219.98,"endTime":1223.42,"body":"summer. I get on the plane to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1219.98,"endTime":1223.42,"body":"Canada, and we get pulled off"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1223.42,"endTime":1226.48,"body":"the plane because there's a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1223.42,"endTime":1226.48,"body":"problem with his passport. And"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1226.48,"endTime":1229.78,"body":"what ends up happening is the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1226.48,"endTime":1229.78,"body":"trip is canceled. If you want to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1229.78,"endTime":1233.32,"body":"see somebody very"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1229.78,"endTime":1233.32,"body":"psychologically inflexible, you"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1233.32,"endTime":1238.42,"body":"would have seen me in that"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1233.32,"endTime":1238.42,"body":"moment on that plane. Something"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1238.42,"endTime":1241.98,"body":"is happening that I don't want"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1238.42,"endTime":1241.98,"body":"to happen. I really want to go"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1241.98,"endTime":1246.12,"body":"on this trip with my son. I was"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1241.98,"endTime":1246.12,"body":"so upset. I was I was like,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1246.12,"endTime":1248.76,"body":"yeah, no, we're gonna make it"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1246.12,"endTime":1248.76,"body":"happen. Okay, we have to make it"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1248.82,"endTime":1251.34,"body":"happen. I was forcing it,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1248.82,"endTime":1251.34,"body":"forcing it, forcing it. We were"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1251.34,"endTime":1254.22,"body":"in the airport for five hours."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1251.34,"endTime":1254.22,"body":"I'm trying to force this trip."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1254.94,"endTime":1259.26,"body":"And finally, my son says to me,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1254.94,"endTime":1259.26,"body":"Mom, you gotta let it go,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1259.92,"endTime":1263.54,"body":"because I just spent five hours"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1259.92,"endTime":1263.54,"body":"fighting something when I could"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1263.54,"endTime":1266.84,"body":"have spent five hours with him,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1263.54,"endTime":1266.84,"body":"which is what I really wanted."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1267.2,"endTime":1270.14,"body":"Psychological flexibility is"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1267.2,"endTime":1270.14,"body":"about knowing your values. What"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1270.14,"endTime":1272.3,"body":"were the values that were"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1270.14,"endTime":1272.3,"body":"driving that trip? For me, it"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1272.3,"endTime":1276.08,"body":"wasn't about mountain biking. It"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1272.3,"endTime":1276.08,"body":"was about spending time with my"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1276.08,"endTime":1279.38,"body":"son, one on one. I just wasted"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1276.08,"endTime":1279.38,"body":"five hours of it fighting the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1279.38,"endTime":1282.76,"body":"United Airlines people. So we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1279.38,"endTime":1282.76,"body":"all are psychological we all"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1282.76,"endTime":1285.58,"body":"move in and out of psychological"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1282.76,"endTime":1285.58,"body":"flexibility, even people that"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1285.58,"endTime":1288.1,"body":"are experts in psychological"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1285.58,"endTime":1288.1,"body":"flexibility. I show"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1288.1,"endTime":1290.98,"body":"psychological inflexibility at"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1288.1,"endTime":1290.98,"body":"times, but then we catch"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1290.98,"endTime":1294.4,"body":"ourselves. This is a choice"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1290.98,"endTime":1294.4,"body":"point, right here and now. Is a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1294.4,"endTime":1297.34,"body":"choice point. Do I want to be"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1294.4,"endTime":1297.34,"body":"inflexible in my thinking,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1297.34,"endTime":1301.02,"body":"inflexible in my behavior,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1297.34,"endTime":1301.02,"body":"inflexible in my attention? Or"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1301.02,"endTime":1304.86,"body":"do I want to flexibly move"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1301.02,"endTime":1304.86,"body":"towards what I care about,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1304.86,"endTime":1308.28,"body":"what's most important in this"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1304.86,"endTime":1308.28,"body":"moment, and when I do so, life"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1308.28,"endTime":1311.82,"body":"opens up, and I actually have"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1308.28,"endTime":1311.82,"body":"more of what I want. I am more"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1311.82,"endTime":1315.12,"body":"of who I want to be. I am proud"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1311.82,"endTime":1315.12,"body":"if someone videotaped me in that"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1315.12,"endTime":1318.24,"body":"moment when I let it go and I"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1315.12,"endTime":1318.24,"body":"looked at him and I said, let's"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1318.24,"endTime":1322.4,"body":"just go to the guitar shop and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1318.24,"endTime":1322.4,"body":"play some guitars together. We"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1322.4,"endTime":1325.52,"body":"took an Uber, we went to the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1322.4,"endTime":1325.52,"body":"guitar shop in our hometown, and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1325.52,"endTime":1328.82,"body":"we just, I just watched him jam"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1325.52,"endTime":1328.82,"body":"for a few hours, and that was as"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1328.82,"endTime":1332.9,"body":"good. It was about something he"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1328.82,"endTime":1332.9,"body":"loved. It says genius, and it"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1332.96,"endTime":1335.54,"body":"doesn't have to be in Canada on"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1332.96,"endTime":1335.54,"body":"a mountain bike, right? So we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1335.54,"endTime":1339.44,"body":"can. We need to let things go,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1335.54,"endTime":1339.44,"body":"but we also need to know what's"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1339.44,"endTime":1342.82,"body":"what our values are, and that's"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1339.44,"endTime":1342.82,"body":"what psychological flexibility"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1342.82,"endTime":1345.7,"body":"is all about. You"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1342.82,"endTime":1345.7,"body":"share in the book that act has a"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1345.7,"endTime":1351.7,"body":"motto, the pain and values are"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1345.7,"endTime":1351.7,"body":"two sides of the same coin, and"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1351.7,"endTime":1354.58,"body":"that feels, if I'm hearing you"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1351.7,"endTime":1354.58,"body":"correctly and understood the"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1354.58,"endTime":1359.14,"body":"book correctly, that being more"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1354.58,"endTime":1359.14,"body":"mindful of our values is the one"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1359.5,"endTime":1364.08,"body":"of the key ways to avoid or get"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1359.5,"endTime":1364.08,"body":"our pull ourselves out of that"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1364.08,"endTime":1367.08,"body":"psychological inflexibility that"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1364.08,"endTime":1367.08,"body":"we so often find ourselves"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1367.68,"endTime":1369.6,"body":"right remembering"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1367.68,"endTime":1369.6,"body":"that our pain points to our"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1369.6,"endTime":1373.74,"body":"values. Yeah, if I didn't care"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1369.6,"endTime":1373.74,"body":"about that time with my son, I"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1373.92,"endTime":1378.12,"body":"wouldn't have been so upset."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1373.92,"endTime":1378.12,"body":"Yeah, right. So the the upset"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1378.12,"endTime":1381.86,"body":"isn't the problem. The upset is"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1378.12,"endTime":1381.86,"body":"an arrow. It's what we do when"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1381.86,"endTime":1384.8,"body":"the upset shows up. Do we do we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1381.86,"endTime":1384.8,"body":"close off to it and try and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1384.8,"endTime":1388.76,"body":"control it? Or do we see it as"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1384.8,"endTime":1388.76,"body":"an arrow pointing to, oh, what"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1388.76,"endTime":1391.64,"body":"do you care about here? Whatever"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1388.76,"endTime":1391.64,"body":"the feeling is, whatever the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1391.64,"endTime":1395.12,"body":"listener is having. Same thing"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1391.64,"endTime":1395.12,"body":"with frustration and anger. You"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1395.12,"endTime":1397.76,"body":"are only angry about something"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1395.12,"endTime":1397.76,"body":"because you care about it,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1398.0,"endTime":1402.76,"body":"right? So you're angry, you're"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1398.0,"endTime":1402.76,"body":"frustrated. You can act on that"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1402.76,"endTime":1407.74,"body":"anger and have unwise effort,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1402.76,"endTime":1407.74,"body":"you know, or you could have wise"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1407.74,"endTime":1411.34,"body":"effort, which is having the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1407.74,"endTime":1411.34,"body":"wisdom to look inside, ask in"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1411.34,"endTime":1415.42,"body":"your heart mind, what is it that"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1411.34,"endTime":1415.42,"body":"matters to me here and act from"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1415.42,"endTime":1418.84,"body":"there? And usually, what matters"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1415.42,"endTime":1418.84,"body":"to you, what flows to the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1418.84,"endTime":1422.58,"body":"surface are things like, Oh, I"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1418.84,"endTime":1422.58,"body":"care about presence. I care"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1422.58,"endTime":1427.38,"body":"about being in relationship. I"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1422.58,"endTime":1427.38,"body":"care about justice. I care about"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1427.38,"endTime":1431.34,"body":"self respect. I care about"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1427.38,"endTime":1431.34,"body":"adventure, whatever it is,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1431.34,"endTime":1435.0,"body":"whatever floats the surface."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1431.34,"endTime":1435.0,"body":"Okay. How can I act on self"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1435.0,"endTime":1438.72,"body":"respect or adventure or justice"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1435.0,"endTime":1438.72,"body":"or whatever in the here and now?"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1439.02,"endTime":1442.16,"body":"And so the what I often will do"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1439.02,"endTime":1442.16,"body":"with clients is I'll have them"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1442.16,"endTime":1445.16,"body":"write that write the painful"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1442.16,"endTime":1445.16,"body":"thing on one side of a note"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1445.16,"endTime":1449.0,"body":"card, and then I'll have them"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1445.16,"endTime":1449.0,"body":"flip it over and write the value"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1449.0,"endTime":1452.48,"body":"that it connects to on the other"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1449.0,"endTime":1452.48,"body":"side of the note card. And I'll"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1452.48,"endTime":1456.62,"body":"say, you can't have one without"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1452.48,"endTime":1456.62,"body":"the other. You see that like I"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1456.62,"endTime":1460.24,"body":"could take away what's painful"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1456.62,"endTime":1460.24,"body":"to you, but in doing so, I'd"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1460.24,"endTime":1463.12,"body":"also have to take away what is"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1460.24,"endTime":1463.12,"body":"important to you. So we need to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1463.12,"endTime":1466.36,"body":"make space for the pain, but we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1463.12,"endTime":1466.36,"body":"need to make it a big enough"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1466.36,"endTime":1469.9,"body":"space, more flexible space, so"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1466.36,"endTime":1469.9,"body":"that you can act from your"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1469.9,"endTime":1473.2,"body":"value. And that is the key to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1469.9,"endTime":1473.2,"body":"psychological flexibility. And"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1473.2,"endTime":1475.78,"body":"also think the key to wise"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1473.2,"endTime":1475.78,"body":"effort. That's what makes us"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1476.08,"endTime":1480.84,"body":"wiser in our efforts. Sometimes"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1476.08,"endTime":1480.84,"body":"the wisest form of effort is is"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1480.84,"endTime":1485.28,"body":"the capacity to open up, to do"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1480.84,"endTime":1485.28,"body":"something different, to feel the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1485.28,"endTime":1488.58,"body":"feelings that you need to feel,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1485.28,"endTime":1488.58,"body":"because we know our comfort"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1488.58,"endTime":1490.86,"body":"zones keep us in the sameness."},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1491.76,"endTime":1494.76,"body":"One last point that"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1491.76,"endTime":1494.76,"body":"you made there in your book is"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1494.76,"endTime":1499.68,"body":"that values help us do hard"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1494.76,"endTime":1499.68,"body":"things. You know, one of the"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1499.68,"endTime":1504.38,"body":"things. Things in in our second"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1499.68,"endTime":1504.38,"body":"book, what do you say? We have a"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1504.38,"endTime":1509.12,"body":"deep dive into values as well."},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1504.38,"endTime":1509.12,"body":"So I think we're on the same"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1509.18,"endTime":1513.02,"body":"we're on the same page. There"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1509.18,"endTime":1513.02,"body":"you talk about research about"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1513.26,"endTime":1517.46,"body":"goal setting versus goal setting"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1513.26,"endTime":1517.46,"body":"with values."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1517.7,"endTime":1520.96,"body":"Oh, well, so smart"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1517.7,"endTime":1520.96,"body":"goals. We've all heard about"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1520.96,"endTime":1526.06,"body":"smart goals, right? Specific,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1520.96,"endTime":1526.06,"body":"meaningful, you know, timely."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1526.54,"endTime":1531.76,"body":"The study that I mentioned was a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1526.54,"endTime":1531.76,"body":"study by Steve Hayes where he"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1531.76,"endTime":1536.14,"body":"had college students at the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1531.76,"endTime":1536.14,"body":"beginning of a semester set"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1536.14,"endTime":1539.5,"body":"SMART goals for themselves,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1536.14,"endTime":1539.5,"body":"academically, right? And then"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1539.5,"endTime":1543.18,"body":"another group randomly assigned"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1539.5,"endTime":1543.18,"body":"to Smet, to set SMART goals,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1543.42,"endTime":1549.06,"body":"plus write about the why behind"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1543.42,"endTime":1549.06,"body":"it. What are the values that are"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1549.06,"endTime":1552.18,"body":"driving this academic"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1549.06,"endTime":1552.18,"body":"achievement that you want to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1552.18,"endTime":1554.46,"body":"have? Like, what does it matter"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1552.18,"endTime":1554.46,"body":"to you? Like, deep down in your"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1554.46,"endTime":1557.58,"body":"heart? Why do you want to show"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1554.46,"endTime":1557.58,"body":"up in this way? What matters to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1557.58,"endTime":1560.36,"body":"you about it? What's important"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1557.58,"endTime":1560.36,"body":"to you personally about it, not"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1560.36,"endTime":1562.88,"body":"just what's important to your"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1560.36,"endTime":1562.88,"body":"parents or your teachers, but"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1562.88,"endTime":1565.4,"body":"for you, like, what do you care"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1562.88,"endTime":1565.4,"body":"about here?"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1565.4,"endTime":1567.8,"body":"And I'm gonna jump"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1565.4,"endTime":1567.8,"body":"in for a hot second there for"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1567.8,"endTime":1571.4,"body":"just for folks who don't know,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1567.8,"endTime":1571.4,"body":"smart, specific, measurable,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1571.46,"endTime":1575.9,"body":"attainable, realistic and time"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1571.46,"endTime":1575.9,"body":"bound. And so that sounds super"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1575.9,"endTime":1579.02,"body":"operational, but what it lacks"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1575.9,"endTime":1579.02,"body":"in just the ways you just shared"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1579.02,"endTime":1585.1,"body":"there, there isn't values,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1579.02,"endTime":1585.1,"body":"meaning heart. It's all Excel"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1585.1,"endTime":1586.42,"body":"spreadsheet and org chart,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1587.98,"endTime":1591.52,"body":"right, right? It's"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1587.98,"endTime":1591.52,"body":"all behavioral without Yeah. So"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1591.52,"endTime":1594.64,"body":"we know that behaviorism is"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1591.52,"endTime":1594.64,"body":"really effective, and I'm not"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1594.64,"endTime":1597.1,"body":"throwing behaviorism under the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1594.64,"endTime":1597.1,"body":"bus here. It's actually really"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1597.1,"endTime":1599.74,"body":"important, but when it's"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1597.1,"endTime":1599.74,"body":"behaviorism without a heart,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1599.74,"endTime":1604.32,"body":"when no one's looking. You don't"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1599.74,"endTime":1604.32,"body":"engage in the behavior, you"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1604.32,"endTime":1607.32,"body":"know, so you got to have the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1604.32,"endTime":1607.32,"body":"heart in there. And then the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1607.32,"endTime":1610.14,"body":"behaviorism is what helps you"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1607.32,"endTime":1610.14,"body":"make sure that you're clarifying"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1610.14,"endTime":1613.02,"body":"the goal, like making it"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1610.14,"endTime":1613.02,"body":"specific. Not just, I want to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1613.02,"endTime":1617.1,"body":"get good grades, but in my"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1613.02,"endTime":1617.1,"body":"algebra class this summer, I"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1617.1,"endTime":1621.68,"body":"want to raise my, you know, a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1617.1,"endTime":1621.68,"body":"minus to an A or whatever it is,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1621.68,"endTime":1625.1,"body":"like I want to complete all my"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1621.68,"endTime":1625.1,"body":"essays on time, whatever it is,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1625.1,"endTime":1627.98,"body":"making it specific. So what they"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1625.1,"endTime":1627.98,"body":"found in the study was the folks"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1627.98,"endTime":1631.28,"body":"that just set SMART goals didn't"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1627.98,"endTime":1631.28,"body":"see any academic improvement at"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1631.28,"endTime":1635.72,"body":"all, and the folks that set"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1631.28,"endTime":1635.72,"body":"SMART goals, plus having that"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1635.72,"endTime":1639.32,"body":"values work showed significant"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1635.72,"endTime":1639.32,"body":"academic improvement. And makes"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1639.32,"endTime":1641.92,"body":"sense. If you you can have the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1639.32,"endTime":1641.92,"body":"roadmap, but if you have no"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1641.92,"endTime":1643.96,"body":"heart in it, you're not going to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1641.92,"endTime":1643.96,"body":"you're not going to"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1643.959,"endTime":1646.419,"body":"take it. It's so"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1643.959,"endTime":1646.419,"body":"interesting. One of the things"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1646.419,"endTime":1650.439,"body":"that that caused, that caused"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1646.419,"endTime":1650.439,"body":"Ned and I to get into kind of"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1650.439,"endTime":1654.579,"body":"focusing on values in our work"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1650.439,"endTime":1654.579,"body":"with parents and kids, is that"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1654.579,"endTime":1657.339,"body":"the research where you got these"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1654.579,"endTime":1657.339,"body":"very anxious high school"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1657.339,"endTime":1660.479,"body":"students preparing to take a"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1657.339,"endTime":1660.479,"body":"test, if they take 15 minutes to"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1660.479,"endTime":1662.759,"body":"write an essay about their"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1660.479,"endTime":1662.759,"body":"highest values. They're much"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1662.759,"endTime":1665.279,"body":"less anxious, and they do better"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1662.759,"endTime":1665.279,"body":"in their test because it puts"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1665.279,"endTime":1668.939,"body":"things in perspective. And I"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1665.279,"endTime":1668.939,"body":"think that kids like talking"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1668.939,"endTime":1670.979,"body":"about what's important to you."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1671.16,"endTime":1673.56,"body":"Yeah, the sweet spot"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1671.16,"endTime":1673.56,"body":"of wise upper I mean, really the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1673.56,"endTime":1678.84,"body":"argument that I'm making is that"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1673.56,"endTime":1678.84,"body":"it's the combination of genius"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1678.84,"endTime":1683.24,"body":"and values. So genius is what"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1678.84,"endTime":1683.24,"body":"comes easily to you. It's what"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1683.3,"endTime":1685.82,"body":"comes naturally to you, what"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1683.3,"endTime":1685.82,"body":"you're great at, your strengths."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1685.82,"endTime":1689.18,"body":"Kids need that. But there's also"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1685.82,"endTime":1689.18,"body":"sometimes we have values that"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1689.78,"endTime":1694.16,"body":"aren't our genius, you know? And"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1689.78,"endTime":1694.16,"body":"I really care about it, but it"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1694.16,"endTime":1696.68,"body":"doesn't come easily to me."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1694.16,"endTime":1696.68,"body":"Things like Courage, risk"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1696.68,"endTime":1700.54,"body":"taking, patience, isn't one of"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1696.68,"endTime":1700.54,"body":"my geniuses, but I really value"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1700.54,"endTime":1706.72,"body":"in right? But if I, if I can, I"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1700.54,"endTime":1706.72,"body":"put them together, then, like"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1706.72,"endTime":1709.42,"body":"the the values are like the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1706.72,"endTime":1709.42,"body":"banks of the river that help"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1709.42,"endTime":1714.76,"body":"that genius energy flow and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1709.42,"endTime":1714.76,"body":"direct it. And when our kids can"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1714.76,"endTime":1717.1,"body":"figure that out for themselves,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1714.76,"endTime":1717.1,"body":"and all of a sudden they're"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1717.1,"endTime":1720.72,"body":"making wiser decisions. I mean,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1717.1,"endTime":1720.72,"body":"if you think about deciding what"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1720.78,"endTime":1724.02,"body":"classes to take in college,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1720.78,"endTime":1724.02,"body":"deciding your school schedule,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1724.02,"endTime":1727.32,"body":"deciding our fall schedule, when"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1724.02,"endTime":1727.32,"body":"there's too many extracurricular"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1727.32,"endTime":1730.56,"body":"activities on your plate, you"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1727.32,"endTime":1730.56,"body":"know, are there areas where you"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1730.56,"endTime":1733.8,"body":"want to explore some things,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1730.56,"endTime":1733.8,"body":"explore some geniuses of yours,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1733.98,"endTime":1737.22,"body":"you know, have that those"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1733.98,"endTime":1737.22,"body":"interests, you know, kind of be"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1737.22,"endTime":1739.92,"body":"new and different. Try something"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1737.22,"endTime":1739.92,"body":"different to figure it out. And"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1740.04,"endTime":1742.76,"body":"then also, what are your values?"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1740.04,"endTime":1742.76,"body":"What's important to you for you"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1742.76,"endTime":1746.9,"body":"know, for my son, that is, could"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1742.76,"endTime":1746.9,"body":"be an completely over scheduled"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1746.9,"endTime":1750.62,"body":"son. He he's going to super"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1746.9,"endTime":1750.62,"body":"academic school next year, a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1750.62,"endTime":1754.16,"body":"ridiculously academic school."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1750.62,"endTime":1754.16,"body":"And he really values his"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1754.16,"endTime":1758.78,"body":"friends. He values surfing with"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1754.16,"endTime":1758.78,"body":"his friends. On Thursday"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1758.78,"endTime":1762.58,"body":"morning, they wake up at 645,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1758.78,"endTime":1762.58,"body":"and they go surf together, try"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1762.58,"endTime":1767.86,"body":"and get a teenager out of bed at"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1762.58,"endTime":1767.86,"body":"645 for anything other than"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1767.86,"endTime":1772.18,"body":"surfing with friends. It's his"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1767.86,"endTime":1772.18,"body":"genius and his values. And let"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1772.18,"endTime":1776.14,"body":"me tell you, I will get up at"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1772.18,"endTime":1776.14,"body":"630 and drive him there, because"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1776.44,"endTime":1779.8,"body":"this to me, there's richness"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1776.44,"endTime":1779.8,"body":"there, and it's not academic,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1779.92,"endTime":1782.88,"body":"it's not the and it will make"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1779.92,"endTime":1782.88,"body":"his school life so much better,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1783.0,"endTime":1787.02,"body":"right? So we want to support"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1783.0,"endTime":1787.02,"body":"that in in our kids. And when"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1787.02,"endTime":1790.68,"body":"you see that, you start it, it"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1787.02,"endTime":1790.68,"body":"paves the way for self driven"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1790.68,"endTime":1790.98,"body":"kids"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1791.22,"endTime":1794.04,"body":"for whatever it's"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1791.22,"endTime":1794.04,"body":"worth. Diana, if I met your if"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1794.04,"endTime":1796.8,"body":"science consulting with your"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1794.04,"endTime":1796.8,"body":"kid, and he was sucking in"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1796.8,"endTime":1800.66,"body":"school, and he told me, I get I"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1796.8,"endTime":1800.66,"body":"get up at 640 Five to go"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1800.66,"endTime":1804.74,"body":"surfing. I don't worry about"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1800.66,"endTime":1804.74,"body":"you. I'm not worried at some"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1804.74,"endTime":1807.32,"body":"point you'll probably want to"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1804.74,"endTime":1807.32,"body":"pay a little bit more attention"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1807.32,"endTime":1809.84,"body":"to school. You probably want to"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1807.32,"endTime":1809.84,"body":"get an education, but I know"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1809.84,"endTime":1812.66,"body":"you're sculpting a brain that"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1809.84,"endTime":1812.66,"body":"knows how to go pedal to the"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1812.66,"endTime":1816.38,"body":"metal for stuff that's important"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1812.66,"endTime":1816.38,"body":"to you. And I'm not worried at"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1816.38,"endTime":1816.62,"body":"all."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1817.04,"endTime":1819.44,"body":"We do something in"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1817.04,"endTime":1819.44,"body":"our house where with our chores,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1819.44,"endTime":1823.54,"body":"this is like a great genius and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1819.44,"endTime":1823.54,"body":"values exercise for folks, we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1823.54,"endTime":1826.24,"body":"share in a household, we are"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1823.54,"endTime":1826.24,"body":"many second you know, we're sort"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1826.24,"endTime":1829.42,"body":"of what we I see. I call us the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1826.24,"endTime":1829.42,"body":"family body has two arms and two"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1829.42,"endTime":1832.42,"body":"legs, right? And we need to work"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1829.42,"endTime":1832.42,"body":"together to make this family"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1832.42,"endTime":1836.08,"body":"body work. And so what we do"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1832.42,"endTime":1836.08,"body":"with chores is we write down all"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1836.08,"endTime":1839.56,"body":"of the tasks of living that need"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1836.08,"endTime":1839.56,"body":"to happen. The compost needs to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1839.56,"endTime":1842.34,"body":"go out, the chickens need to get"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1839.56,"endTime":1842.34,"body":"fed, the dishwasher needs to be"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1842.34,"endTime":1845.04,"body":"emptied, we need to vacuum."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1842.34,"endTime":1845.04,"body":"These are just the things that"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1845.04,"endTime":1847.86,"body":"need to happen for our house to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1845.04,"endTime":1847.86,"body":"function. And I put them on post"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1847.86,"endTime":1850.74,"body":"it notes, and I put all the post"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1847.86,"endTime":1850.74,"body":"it notes on the counter. And"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1850.74,"endTime":1856.68,"body":"then we get to go in and choose"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1850.74,"endTime":1856.68,"body":"which ones do we want to do"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1857.64,"endTime":1862.28,"body":"right? And then we also get to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1857.64,"endTime":1862.28,"body":"choose, how do we want to do"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1862.34,"endTime":1865.94,"body":"that? Love this. So for my 15"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1862.34,"endTime":1865.94,"body":"year old, who's learning how to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1865.94,"endTime":1872.12,"body":"drive, he chooses compost. Now"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1865.94,"endTime":1872.12,"body":"the compost pile, we live on"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1872.12,"endTime":1875.3,"body":"this shared lane with all these"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1872.12,"endTime":1875.3,"body":"houses, and the compost is like"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1875.9,"endTime":1880.4,"body":"an acre, okay, down the road."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1875.9,"endTime":1880.4,"body":"Okay. So he takes the compost."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1880.4,"endTime":1883.3,"body":"He said, Yeah, I get to do it"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1880.4,"endTime":1883.3,"body":"how I want to do it. So for him,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1883.42,"endTime":1887.74,"body":"it's putting the compost in the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1883.42,"endTime":1887.74,"body":"car and driving it down the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1887.74,"endTime":1891.34,"body":"lane, like just down the lane,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1887.74,"endTime":1891.34,"body":"getting out of the car, dumping"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1891.34,"endTime":1895.0,"body":"the compost, getting back in the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1891.34,"endTime":1895.0,"body":"car, driving it back. My 15 year"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1895.0,"endTime":1899.2,"body":"old with his permit. So here we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1895.0,"endTime":1899.2,"body":"go, right. He's doing it his"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1899.2,"endTime":1902.04,"body":"way. He's getting the job done."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1899.2,"endTime":1902.04,"body":"He's using his genius, and it's"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1902.04,"endTime":1904.68,"body":"his values. Guess what? A"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1902.04,"endTime":1904.68,"body":"teenager really values"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1904.74,"endTime":1910.26,"body":"independence. So I step back and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1904.74,"endTime":1910.26,"body":"I say, that's that is wise"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1910.26,"endTime":1913.26,"body":"effort, right there, Simon, just"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1910.26,"endTime":1913.26,"body":"don't put any banana kills."},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1913.32,"endTime":1917.4,"body":"I think you've just"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1913.32,"endTime":1917.4,"body":"given us our newest book, self"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1917.4,"endTime":1919.92,"body":"driven composters, right?"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1919.919,"endTime":1926.239,"body":"So wise effort is is"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1919.919,"endTime":1926.239,"body":"putting energy and effort into"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1926.239,"endTime":1930.619,"body":"things, into things that matter,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1926.239,"endTime":1930.619,"body":"and less energy and effort into"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1930.619,"endTime":1933.919,"body":"things that don't matter, like"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1930.619,"endTime":1933.919,"body":"fighting over chores. You're"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1933.919,"endTime":1938.179,"body":"lying bill like I love you more"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1933.919,"endTime":1938.179,"body":"than you know I love you too"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1938.179,"endTime":1940.539,"body":"much to fight about your"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1938.179,"endTime":1940.539,"body":"homework. I love you too much to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1940.539,"endTime":1942.999,"body":"fight about chores. Why are we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1940.539,"endTime":1942.999,"body":"spending our energy in our"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1942.999,"endTime":1945.819,"body":"family body on this? This is"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1942.999,"endTime":1945.819,"body":"such a waste of our family body"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1945.819,"endTime":1949.119,"body":"energy. And so I want us to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1945.819,"endTime":1949.119,"body":"think about, how are we using"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1949.119,"endTime":1953.079,"body":"our family body energy,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1949.119,"endTime":1953.079,"body":"especially, you know, these kids"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1953.079,"endTime":1956.439,"body":"are, they're going, they're on"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1953.079,"endTime":1956.439,"body":"their way out. You know, how"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1956.439,"endTime":1959.559,"body":"much more time do I have? The"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1956.439,"endTime":1959.559,"body":"runway is short, so let's make"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1959.559,"endTime":1961.979,"body":"it not about fighting with her"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":1959.559,"endTime":1961.979,"body":"as much as we possibly can."},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1962.1,"endTime":1966.18,"body":"It's so beautiful."},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1962.1,"endTime":1966.18,"body":"Ned and I read that by the time"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1966.18,"endTime":1969.66,"body":"your kids leaves home, that age"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1966.18,"endTime":1969.66,"body":"18 or so, they'll have spent was"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":1969.66,"endTime":1970.92,"body":"95% of the time,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1970.919,"endTime":1973.199,"body":"90% of all the time"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1970.919,"endTime":1973.199,"body":"they will have ever spent with"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1973.199,"endTime":1977.279,"body":"us, on average. Which makes it"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1973.199,"endTime":1977.279,"body":"go, yeah. But one would one"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1977.279,"endTime":1980.479,"body":"would suggest, when you have a"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1977.279,"endTime":1980.479,"body":"family, body wise energy,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1980.479,"endTime":1983.899,"body":"process the way that yours is,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1980.479,"endTime":1983.899,"body":"the Wiser it is, the more time"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1983.899,"endTime":1986.539,"body":"they're likely to want to spend"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1983.899,"endTime":1986.539,"body":"with you later, you know,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1986.539,"endTime":1989.359,"body":"because I always think about,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1986.539,"endTime":1989.359,"body":"you know, for even kids 12 and"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1989.359,"endTime":1992.359,"body":"15, right? I'm trying to build"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1989.359,"endTime":1992.359,"body":"towards the adult relationship"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1992.359,"endTime":1995.719,"body":"that I want to have with them,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1992.359,"endTime":1995.719,"body":"you know, later on in life, so"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1995.719,"endTime":1998.059,"body":"that there's so that they will"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1995.719,"endTime":1998.059,"body":"want to spend time with me when"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1998.059,"endTime":2001.619,"body":"I'm, you know, old and, you"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":1998.059,"endTime":2001.619,"body":"know, crotchety well."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2001.62,"endTime":2003.66,"body":"There's also"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2001.62,"endTime":2003.66,"body":"perception of time, which we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2003.66,"endTime":2007.08,"body":"know there's a researcher,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2003.66,"endTime":2007.08,"body":"Cassie Holmes, out of UCLA, that"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2007.08,"endTime":2011.28,"body":"studies time perception and and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2007.08,"endTime":2011.28,"body":"actually, specifically time"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2011.28,"endTime":2015.18,"body":"poverty, the feeling that we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2011.28,"endTime":2015.18,"body":"don't have enough time. And what"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2015.18,"endTime":2017.46,"body":"some of her she has done a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2015.18,"endTime":2017.46,"body":"number of different fascinating"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2017.46,"endTime":2021.26,"body":"studies, but what some of her"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2017.46,"endTime":2021.26,"body":"research shows is that when we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2021.38,"endTime":2026.12,"body":"are engaging in a meaningful"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2021.38,"endTime":2026.12,"body":"activity, we feel like we have"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2026.12,"endTime":2030.44,"body":"more time when we are being"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2026.12,"endTime":2030.44,"body":"generous with our time and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2030.44,"endTime":2034.04,"body":"giving it away. She actually did"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2030.44,"endTime":2034.04,"body":"a study where she had people"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2034.52,"endTime":2039.08,"body":"donate their time to helping"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2034.52,"endTime":2039.08,"body":"college student that was like a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2039.08,"endTime":2041.56,"body":"first gen college, college"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2039.08,"endTime":2041.56,"body":"student work on their essays or"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2041.56,"endTime":2044.5,"body":"something like that, the folks"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2041.56,"endTime":2044.5,"body":"that donated their time felt"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2044.5,"endTime":2048.16,"body":"like they had more time in their"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2044.5,"endTime":2048.16,"body":"day. What is that about? Right?"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2048.16,"endTime":2051.64,"body":"So when you're engaging with"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2048.16,"endTime":2051.64,"body":"things in a meaningful way, in a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2051.64,"endTime":2053.98,"body":"values based way, when you're"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2051.64,"endTime":2053.98,"body":"engaging with your kids in a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2053.98,"endTime":2057.4,"body":"values based way, you will feel"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2053.98,"endTime":2057.4,"body":"like you have more time with"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2057.4,"endTime":2061.5,"body":"your kids. Because most of the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2057.4,"endTime":2061.5,"body":"time we're just rushing through"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2061.74,"endTime":2064.98,"body":"and we feel like we don't have"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2061.74,"endTime":2064.98,"body":"enough time. We're not slowing"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2064.98,"endTime":2068.4,"body":"down to pick the strawberry,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2064.98,"endTime":2068.4,"body":"like my grandma did for me that"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2068.4,"endTime":2072.12,"body":"probably 10 minutes or 20"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2068.4,"endTime":2072.12,"body":"minutes, I'm talking about it 40"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2072.12,"endTime":2075.72,"body":"years later, it was in a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2072.12,"endTime":2075.72,"body":"meaningful time they had stuck"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2075.72,"endTime":2080.3,"body":"with me, right? So we can create"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2075.72,"endTime":2080.3,"body":"those types of moments with our"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2080.3,"endTime":2082.7,"body":"kids, when we use our energy"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2080.3,"endTime":2082.7,"body":"wisely, when we make it more"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2082.7,"endTime":2085.46,"body":"meaningful, more values based,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2082.7,"endTime":2085.46,"body":"we drop the stuff that needs to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2085.46,"endTime":2088.82,"body":"be dropped. And that sadness, if"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2085.46,"endTime":2088.82,"body":"you just had a little thing in"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2088.82,"endTime":2091.82,"body":"your stomach that turned upside"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2088.82,"endTime":2091.82,"body":"down when you said 90% of the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2091.82,"endTime":2094.82,"body":"time you're spending with your"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2091.82,"endTime":2094.82,"body":"kids, is now that sadness points"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2094.82,"endTime":2099.74,"body":"to what you value. So use that"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2094.82,"endTime":2099.74,"body":"sadness as a guide for how the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2099.74,"endTime":2102.34,"body":"choice. Choices that you're"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2099.74,"endTime":2102.34,"body":"making and how you're spending"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2102.34,"endTime":2103.96,"body":"your time today. Can you finish"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2102.34,"endTime":2103.96,"body":"that"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2103.96,"endTime":2107.14,"body":"point by telling"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2103.96,"endTime":2107.14,"body":"the story about Daniel and his"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2107.14,"endTime":2110.26,"body":"daughter, someone who had"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2107.14,"endTime":2110.26,"body":"limited time, and we all do, but"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2110.26,"endTime":2111.16,"body":"his was more,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2111.34,"endTime":2117.1,"body":"yeah. So Daniel was"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2111.34,"endTime":2117.1,"body":"a medic who had cancer, and he"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2117.1,"endTime":2120.24,"body":"had this scar that went down the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2117.1,"endTime":2120.24,"body":"side of his neck, and he had a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2120.24,"endTime":2123.72,"body":"reoccurrence of cancer. And if"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2120.24,"endTime":2123.72,"body":"you are a cancer survivor, you"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2123.72,"endTime":2129.42,"body":"know that every single test is a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2123.72,"endTime":2129.42,"body":"waiting game, right to hear back"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2129.66,"endTime":2134.46,"body":"whether or not what's going to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2129.66,"endTime":2134.46,"body":"happen this time. And he, he"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2134.46,"endTime":2137.4,"body":"actually came into my office and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2134.46,"endTime":2137.4,"body":"he, he would never touch his"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2137.4,"endTime":2140.18,"body":"neck. He was so avoidant of this"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2137.4,"endTime":2140.18,"body":"thing. He was like a medic who"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2140.18,"endTime":2142.34,"body":"could, like save lives, but"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2140.18,"endTime":2142.34,"body":"couldn't touch his own neck in"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2142.34,"endTime":2145.1,"body":"the shower, right? Because the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2142.34,"endTime":2145.1,"body":"neck touching his neck, he"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2145.1,"endTime":2149.96,"body":"associated it with loss of his"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2145.1,"endTime":2149.96,"body":"kids. He was so terrified of"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2150.32,"endTime":2153.2,"body":"dying and leaving his kids in"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2150.32,"endTime":2153.2,"body":"the pain that it would bring"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2153.2,"endTime":2156.92,"body":"him. And so one day, he was off."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2153.2,"endTime":2156.92,"body":"He was in between. He was"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2156.92,"endTime":2160.36,"body":"waiting for a PET scan to come"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2156.92,"endTime":2160.36,"body":"back and spoil alert. It came"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2160.36,"endTime":2165.22,"body":"back positive. So he was waiting"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2160.36,"endTime":2165.22,"body":"for this PET scan to come back,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2165.94,"endTime":2171.16,"body":"and he wrote to me. And actually"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2165.94,"endTime":2171.16,"body":"what he wrote is what I put in"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2171.16,"endTime":2174.82,"body":"the book, but he wrote to me"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2171.16,"endTime":2174.82,"body":"about how all of a sudden he"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2174.82,"endTime":2178.72,"body":"realized that the thing that he"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2174.82,"endTime":2178.72,"body":"was so afraid of touching was"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2178.72,"endTime":2182.28,"body":"right there while he was rock"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2178.72,"endTime":2182.28,"body":"climbing with his daughter, and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2182.28,"endTime":2185.04,"body":"his daughter looked up to him"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2182.28,"endTime":2185.04,"body":"while they're on the face of the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2185.04,"endTime":2189.48,"body":"rock, and was like, Daddy, and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2185.04,"endTime":2189.48,"body":"he saw her, and in that moment,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2189.6,"endTime":2193.14,"body":"he had the very thing like life."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2189.6,"endTime":2193.14,"body":"He called it life at its most,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2193.14,"endTime":2196.68,"body":"lifey is right here and now,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2193.14,"endTime":2196.68,"body":"independent of what that test is"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2196.68,"endTime":2198.9,"body":"going to have, like, what's"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2196.68,"endTime":2198.9,"body":"going to happen a week from now,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2198.9,"endTime":2202.28,"body":"or a year from now, or three"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2198.9,"endTime":2202.28,"body":"years from now, he had it, which"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2202.28,"endTime":2204.68,"body":"was to be present with his"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2202.28,"endTime":2204.68,"body":"daughter and connect with his"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2204.68,"endTime":2207.14,"body":"daughter, and then it all"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2204.68,"endTime":2207.14,"body":"shifted for him is that that's"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2207.14,"endTime":2211.46,"body":"how I'm going to invest my time."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2207.14,"endTime":2211.46,"body":"I'm going to touch my neck in"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2211.46,"endTime":2214.58,"body":"the shower, because I need to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2211.46,"endTime":2214.58,"body":"touch it to see if this thing is"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2214.58,"endTime":2217.88,"body":"growing. I'm going to go to the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2214.58,"endTime":2217.88,"body":"appointments, and I'm also going"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2217.88,"endTime":2221.38,"body":"to be with my kids. And it was a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2217.88,"endTime":2221.38,"body":"it was life at its most likely"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2221.38,"endTime":2224.38,"body":"that sometimes, going back to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2221.38,"endTime":2224.38,"body":"the impermanence that we talked"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2224.38,"endTime":2229.0,"body":"about before, sometimes getting"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2224.38,"endTime":2229.0,"body":"close up against impermanence"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2229.0,"endTime":2231.76,"body":"and knowing that things aren't"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2229.0,"endTime":2231.76,"body":"going to be this way forever,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2232.0,"endTime":2236.92,"body":"helps us make decisions and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2232.0,"endTime":2236.92,"body":"choose to use our energy in the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2236.92,"endTime":2240.96,"body":"here and now, really in a much"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2236.92,"endTime":2240.96,"body":"more aligned way. And for Daniel"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2240.96,"endTime":2244.74,"body":"that was being with his kids and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2240.96,"endTime":2244.74,"body":"continues to be so as he's, you"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2244.74,"endTime":2248.52,"body":"know, continued with love blame,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2244.74,"endTime":2248.52,"body":"I see this as a journey that we"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2248.52,"endTime":2252.36,"body":"get to cycle back in over and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2248.52,"endTime":2252.36,"body":"over again, get curious, open"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2252.36,"endTime":2257.94,"body":"up, focus your energy, and then"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2252.36,"endTime":2257.94,"body":"do it again. So it's beautiful,"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":2257.939,"endTime":2261.079,"body":"and I'm so"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":2257.939,"endTime":2261.079,"body":"grateful that you did. There's"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":2261.079,"endTime":2264.319,"body":"so much wisdom in this book, and"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":2261.079,"endTime":2264.319,"body":"really is and I think, in terms"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":2264.319,"endTime":2268.759,"body":"of our mission of helping"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":2264.319,"endTime":2268.759,"body":"parents and kids feel better and"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":2268.759,"endTime":2272.359,"body":"do better, there's so much that"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":2268.759,"endTime":2272.359,"body":"parents can use in their own"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":2272.359,"endTime":2275.239,"body":"lives and through which they"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":2272.359,"endTime":2275.239,"body":"could help their own kids. This"},{"speaker":"Bill Stixrud","startTime":2275.299,"endTime":2276.679,"body":"is beautiful Diana."},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2276.68,"endTime":2278.66,"body":"Thank you for such"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2276.68,"endTime":2278.66,"body":"a wise and wonderful book and"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2278.66,"endTime":2281.02,"body":"for gifting us with more of your"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2278.66,"endTime":2281.02,"body":"time."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2281.5,"endTime":2283.42,"body":"Thank you for having"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2281.5,"endTime":2283.42,"body":"me, and thank you for all that"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2283.42,"endTime":2286.36,"body":"you've taught me. And over the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2283.42,"endTime":2286.36,"body":"years, my kids are, like I said,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2286.36,"endTime":2290.62,"body":"at the tail end of that runway"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2286.36,"endTime":2290.62,"body":"of my 90% and your work has"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2290.62,"endTime":2294.22,"body":"really influenced me as a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2290.62,"endTime":2294.22,"body":"parent. It's been, you know, I"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2294.22,"endTime":2297.76,"body":"think the what do you say book,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2294.22,"endTime":2297.76,"body":"the nuts and bolts of that one,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2297.76,"endTime":2302.1,"body":"were really beneficial to me as"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2297.76,"endTime":2302.1,"body":"a parent, but then also me as a"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2302.22,"endTime":2306.12,"body":"therapist in coaching parents,"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2302.22,"endTime":2306.12,"body":"because sometimes we just need"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2306.12,"endTime":2310.74,"body":"to know what he said. And I love"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2306.12,"endTime":2310.74,"body":"having the two of you as coaches"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2310.74,"endTime":2313.44,"body":"in that and we'll continue to"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2310.74,"endTime":2313.44,"body":"return to that one. And then the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2313.44,"endTime":2316.02,"body":"foundational principles of the"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2313.44,"endTime":2316.02,"body":"self driven child have been"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2316.02,"endTime":2318.42,"body":"just, sort of like just saying"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2316.02,"endTime":2318.42,"body":"that. I mean, it's sort of like"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2318.42,"endTime":2320.78,"body":"wise effort. All you need to say"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2318.42,"endTime":2320.78,"body":"is the self driven child. And"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2320.78,"endTime":2323.12,"body":"people get it, you know wise"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2320.78,"endTime":2323.12,"body":"effort, you kind of get it. You"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2323.12,"endTime":2325.34,"body":"kind of know what unwise effort"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2323.12,"endTime":2325.34,"body":"is. You know what you know wise"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2325.34,"endTime":2328.22,"body":"effort is, you kind of know what"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2325.34,"endTime":2328.22,"body":"it unself driven child is, and"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2328.22,"endTime":2329.0,"body":"you don't want one"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2329.0,"endTime":2331.16,"body":"of those. They're"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2329.0,"endTime":2331.16,"body":"not making you crazy."},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2331.16,"endTime":2333.14,"body":"I love it's a good"},{"speaker":"Diana Hill","startTime":2331.16,"endTime":2333.14,"body":"term. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2333.44,"endTime":2335.66,"body":"beautiful. Love it."},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2333.44,"endTime":2335.66,"body":"Thank you. Thanks."},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2340.7,"endTime":2345.64,"body":"Here are four things I hope you"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2340.7,"endTime":2345.64,"body":"take away. One for kids in high"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2345.64,"endTime":2349.36,"body":"achieving spaces, the idea of"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2345.64,"endTime":2349.36,"body":"what matters like what is true"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2349.36,"endTime":2354.28,"body":"genius is really narrow. There"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2349.36,"endTime":2354.28,"body":"are a lot of skills, traits and"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2354.28,"endTime":2358.18,"body":"geniuses that kids may not think"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2354.28,"endTime":2358.18,"body":"matter because they don't show"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2358.18,"endTime":2361.74,"body":"up on a test. And we can help"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2358.18,"endTime":2361.74,"body":"our kids by noticing and"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2361.74,"endTime":2365.4,"body":"appreciating the things we truly"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2361.74,"endTime":2365.4,"body":"authentically see about them,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2365.88,"endTime":2369.0,"body":"not the things that society"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2365.88,"endTime":2369.0,"body":"tells us we should be rewarding"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2369.78,"endTime":2374.76,"body":"and express appreciation for who"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2369.78,"endTime":2374.76,"body":"your child is, not what they do."},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2376.2,"endTime":2381.56,"body":"Two your kids interests are"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2376.2,"endTime":2381.56,"body":"developing, continue to explore,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2381.56,"endTime":2384.92,"body":"continue to be open with your"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2381.56,"endTime":2384.92,"body":"children. Don't channel them too"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2384.92,"endTime":2389.06,"body":"soon onto one super highway,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2384.92,"endTime":2389.06,"body":"because they may miss out on so"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2389.06,"endTime":2394.04,"body":"many other things that matter."},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2389.06,"endTime":2394.04,"body":"Three, help your kids think"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2394.04,"endTime":2398.06,"body":"about the values that motivate"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2394.04,"endTime":2398.06,"body":"their goals, the why behind it."},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2398.42,"endTime":2401.56,"body":"What are the values that are"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2398.42,"endTime":2401.56,"body":"driving. This, say, academic"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2401.56,"endTime":2405.1,"body":"achievement that you want to"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2401.56,"endTime":2405.1,"body":"have, not just what's important"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2405.1,"endTime":2408.64,"body":"to parents or teachers help your"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2405.1,"endTime":2408.64,"body":"kids think about the values that"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2408.64,"endTime":2413.32,"body":"motivate their goals, the why"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2408.64,"endTime":2413.32,"body":"behind it. For example, what are"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2413.32,"endTime":2416.56,"body":"the values that are driving you"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2413.32,"endTime":2416.56,"body":"for this academic achievement"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2416.56,"endTime":2420.04,"body":"you so want to have, not just"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2416.56,"endTime":2420.04,"body":"what's important to us as your"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2420.04,"endTime":2424.14,"body":"parents your teachers, but for"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2420.04,"endTime":2424.14,"body":"you, like deep down in your"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2424.14,"endTime":2429.3,"body":"heart, why does it matter to you"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2424.14,"endTime":2429.3,"body":"four, when we feel that we are"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2429.3,"endTime":2432.78,"body":"engaging in a meaningful"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2429.3,"endTime":2432.78,"body":"activity, we feel that we have"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2432.78,"endTime":2437.52,"body":"more time so we can create those"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2432.78,"endTime":2437.52,"body":"types of moments with our kids,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2437.52,"endTime":2441.32,"body":"when we use our energy wisely,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2437.52,"endTime":2441.32,"body":"when we make it more meaningful,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2441.38,"endTime":2446.24,"body":"more values based when we do so,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2441.38,"endTime":2446.24,"body":"we drop the stuff that needs to"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2446.24,"endTime":2450.8,"body":"be dropped, and we put our time"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2446.24,"endTime":2450.8,"body":"and our attention and our values"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2450.86,"endTime":2456.68,"body":"in things that matter most. I'm"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2450.86,"endTime":2456.68,"body":"Ned Johnson, and this is the"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2456.68,"endTime":2464.08,"body":"self driven child podcast. Hey"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2456.68,"endTime":2464.08,"body":"folks, over the past 25 years,"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2464.08,"endTime":2467.08,"body":"I've talked to countless parents"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2464.08,"endTime":2467.08,"body":"of high school age students who"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2467.08,"endTime":2470.68,"body":"care deeply about their kids'"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2467.08,"endTime":2470.68,"body":"education and how they deal with"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2470.68,"endTime":2474.16,"body":"stress and the pressure to"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2470.68,"endTime":2474.16,"body":"succeed. It can help parents to"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2474.16,"endTime":2477.16,"body":"work with a team they trust"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2474.16,"endTime":2477.16,"body":"won't just pile on more pressure"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2477.16,"endTime":2480.22,"body":"to achieve better scores and"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2477.16,"endTime":2480.22,"body":"grades. That's why I founded"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2480.22,"endTime":2484.38,"body":"prep matters in 1997 to create a"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2480.22,"endTime":2484.38,"body":"different kind of experience for"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2484.38,"endTime":2488.28,"body":"test preparation and academic"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2484.38,"endTime":2488.28,"body":"tutoring. This podcast and my"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2488.28,"endTime":2491.22,"body":"books with my friend Bill"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2488.28,"endTime":2491.22,"body":"stixfruit reflect our company"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2491.22,"endTime":2494.7,"body":"philosophy and approach to"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2491.22,"endTime":2494.7,"body":"helping students. If you have a"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2494.7,"endTime":2496.98,"body":"high school age student and"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2494.7,"endTime":2496.98,"body":"would like to talk about putting"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2496.98,"endTime":2501.14,"body":"a plan together, please get in"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2496.98,"endTime":2501.14,"body":"touch with us. Visit our website"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2501.14,"endTime":2505.04,"body":"at prep matters.com, or while"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2501.14,"endTime":2505.04,"body":"your kids may only text, you"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2505.04,"endTime":2508.94,"body":"might want to actually talk with"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2505.04,"endTime":2508.94,"body":"a person, if so, you can reach"},{"speaker":"Ned Johnson","startTime":2508.94,"endTime":2512.78,"body":"us at 301-951-0350 you."}]}