Overcome Addiction & Take Control

Ever notice how a “little escape” becomes the main event? We dig into the hidden sequence that drives most self-sabotage: discontentment breeds coping, coping breeds entitlement, and entitlement locks the cycle. Through a candid client story about marital distance and porn relapse, we show how ego turns justifications into handcuffs—and how to break free with clarity, courage, and consistent action.

We talk about the real reasons people reach for quick relief—alcohol, pills, porn, food, or endless scrolling—and why the short-term numbness never repairs the core issue. I walk through a practical audit of life domains—relationships, mental health, fitness, finances, career, and spirituality—to spot the exact gaps that trigger vices. You’ll learn why writing your thoughts cuts through fog, how to frame honest conversations that heal instead of blame, and what to do when fear of conflict keeps you stuck.

From there, we shift into a grounded playbook: replace numbing loops with stabilizing rituals, design simple pattern breaks for high-risk moments, and rebuild trust with actions that make you proud. No fluff—just direct tools to confront what hurts, speak what’s true, and act in a way your future self will thank you for. If you’re ready to stop justifying choices that weaken you and start repairing the parts of life that matter most, this one offers the map and the motive.

If this message hit home, subscribe, share it with a friend who needs it, and leave a quick review so we can reach more people ready to change.

Chapters

• 0:00 Entitlement And Ego Exposed
• 0:28 Host Welcome And Mission
• 0:50 Defining Pleasure-Seeking And Vices
• 1:43 Personal Addiction Backstory
• 2:38 Write It Down For Clarity
• 2:50 Discontentment Breeds Justification
• 3:23 Client Case: Marriage And Porn Relapse
• 5:24 Avoidance Versus Honest Communication
• 6:52 Entitlement As Self-Sabotage
• 8:04 Awareness, Inventory, And Action Steps
• 9:55 Closing And Support Request

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:00

If you do something that you know you shouldn't do and you justify the behavior, it's because you feel like what you're entitled to do it, you're above, you're above everybody else. It's okay for you to do it. Entitlement is so damaging. That's when the ego manipulates you to do something that you know is not to your advantage or bettering you in your life, but you do it anyways because you justify it. Welcome back to another episode of the Unstoppable Mindset Podcast. I'm your host, Sean Crane, and thank you for tuning in to this message. Make sure to subscribe and share if you haven't already. The goal is to grow exposure, grow this message, change more lives. I couldn't do it without your support. So I appreciate you helping me reach more people, share with your friends, family, social media. I don't care. I appreciate it. And today I want to share with you guys a message that's going to help you. Okay. Whether you're somebody that's struggling with vices, um, uh, you know, procrastination, pleasure-seeking behavior, or if you know somebody, this could generate some insight that will help them break free of that pattern and change and make a meaningful change. And so the first thing I want to share with you is how we end up basically justifying pleasure-seeking behavior. What I mean by that is if you're somebody that uses drugs and alcohol to numb things out or cope, maybe use food like a lot of people do to manage stress or just some something that you're unhappy with in your life. A lot of people get addicted to their phones and screen time. I know a lot of guys out there who struggle with porn addiction or sex addiction. You know, there's a lot of different addictions that people develop. And there's a reason why. It's like a band-aid. It numbs some feelings, something that you don't want to face. You know, for me, I battled addiction for 10 years, predominantly pills, alcohol, weed, but I would just do all kinds of drugs. I'd go out and party and I was just wild. And it was because I was numbing out pain and hurt from my past that I didn't want to deal with because I wasn't willing to accept it. And the reason I wouldn't accept it is because I wasn't willing to even talk about it or face it. So we're going to get into that. We're going to get into how you have to address things if you want them to change. You have to have a little courage there and willingness. Because it's really hard to look at parts of your life that you're unhappy with and address them, especially if it's in a marriage, especially if it's with your business partner, especially whether it's your best friend. Like relationships are some of the issues that over time become toxic and people don't change or address them, and it allows these issues to persist. So the first thing I want to share with you is, and you can write this down. Write this down because when you write things down, it increases your retention up to 60%. So whether it's a podcast episode, a piece of piece of content you like, if it's something you're reading in a book, write it down. Take notes. It's going to help you to retain that information that much more. And I want you to write this down. Discontentment in your life, meaning being unhappy with something, not content, not grateful for it. Discontentment leads to pleasure-seeking behavior, and it also leads to entitlement around that behavior. So let's take, let's take this example, for instance. I'm going to say that again. Discontentment leads to pleasure-seeking behavior. Again, vices, right? Something that you're using to numb out that feeling. And it also creates entitlement around that behavior, like justification. You know, and I want to use this example. I was talking to one of my clients last week, and we brought this exact topic up. And he's somebody who has in the past struggled with not just sex addiction, but more recently, porn addiction. And he and we were talking about this, and it was something that he's done well, abstaining from, but that every once in a while like relapses. And I've worked with a lot of clients who have porn addiction. I've worked with a lot of clients who have addiction to drugs and alcohol. I've worked with a lot of clients who have food addiction. You know, they're all very similar. People use a different substance or have a different outlet, but it's all to numb a feeling out and make them feel okay in a moment where they're at disease, where they don't feel well, where they have discontentment. Right? What it does is it temporarily numb that feeling. It blocks it. It's like a band-aid, but it doesn't fix the core issue. Typically, the core issue comes from something that they went through that they're upset about, angry about, some hurt, some shame, something they're still discontent about in their life. Okay. So we're talking about this, me and my client, and in the midst of that, he brings up his relationship with his wife and how they haven't been on the same page for about a year or 18 months. And this is something that started happening after their last child that they had. They're not intimate as much. He's not getting the affection from her. It's not just the sex, it's the attention too that he's bringing up. So that leads to him just feeling discontent about the relationship, lacking gratitude for this beautiful life they've created, like not looking at their relationship through the lens of positivity, but more so of lacking, right? So this first starts as a thought, a perspective, right? That festers over time. And then it leads to a feeling, an underlying emotion. And so for him, that became discontentment. Discontentment with the relationship, not feeling like he's appreciated, not having his needs met. And I'm sure a lot of you out there can relate to that, especially in relationships. But people have the same underlying feeling in a lot of areas of life. Maybe it has to do with your career path or the amount of money you make in your job or just your friends or just what you're doing in your life. Maybe, like my client, it's one of your personal and close relationships. Maybe it's your marriage. And so when this happens, instead of addressing it, talking about it, and communicating this feeling to his wife, um, he just let it let it persist. He didn't want to rock the boat, so to speak. You know, a lot of times in relationships, uh, people are scared to bring things up. They're scared to create an argument, they're scared to create, you know, these resentments and and they don't want to have that uncomfortable feeling of arguing and fighting. Sometimes you gotta fight things out and you gotta you gotta communicate to get on the same page. And one of the best things you can do, especially in a marriage, is be honest with your significant other. And even if you feel like something you tell them might hurt them or might cause them to be shocked a little bit, um, people don't know what they don't know. They can't change if if you're not being open and honest with them. And so, yeah, it might might hurt them at first. Like if my client was like, hey, I've been uh to his wife, I've been looking at porn, you know, I relapsed, I've been masturbating every night. Like, that's an embarrassing thing for a man to probably go and tell his wife for most guys and make him feel ashamed and make him feel embarrassed. But guess what? If if you're scared to do something because of those reasons, chances are you're already internalizing those emotions. So this is actually what came out of my conversation with my client. You know, he's talking about how he's not being intimate with his wife, how he's relapsed on porn, and you know, he's doing something that he feels ashamed about. That's what it ultimately comes down to. He's feeling ashamed of the behavior, right? And he's also justifying it. This is where the entitlement comes into play. Okay. If you do something that you know you shouldn't do and you justify the behavior, it's because you feel like what? You're entitled to do it, you're above, you're above everybody else. It's okay for you to do it. Entitlement is so damaging. That's when the ego manipulates you to do something that you know is not to your advantage or bettering you in your life, but you do it anyways because you justify it. Oh, my wife's not giving me attention. Like, oh, things have changed in the relationship, you know. Like, that's like the guy who's not making money in his job and he feels bad because he can't provide the life he wants for his family. So he's drinking every night to numb that feeling out. Same thing. You're justifying the behavior, you're entitled. You're entitled to drink because you're broke, because you feel like you're being a lame father or provider for your family. So that's never gonna work. That's never gonna resolve the core issue. Same with my client who is looking at porn and feeling bad about that because he's a married man. It's not gonna resolve or fix the relationship. See, a lot of people have this delusion where if they just leave something alone and ignore it for a while, it fixes itself. Seldom does that work. Oftentimes it progresses and gets worse. The issue, the resentment, the underlying emotion, the feeling, it gets worse over time. It never goes away. And so if you want to fix any area of your life where you feel discontentment, and that's leading to these coping mechanisms, behaviors that don't serve you, these vices, these bad habits, number one, you have to be aware of it. You have to be aware of it and take inventory. This is why self-reflection and honesty with self is so important. I want you to look at every area of your life right now: relationships, health, your mental health, your spirituality, your finances, your career, take inventory. Are all these areas up to par? Are they exactly where you want them to be? Or do you have a void? Is there a missing piece? Is there something that you're discontent about? Secondly, if you're in a marriage like my client, or you know, you have a career and a job that you hate, or you're unhappy with your friend group, or whatever it is, you have to have the courage to address it and and and talk to somebody or communicate this issue. You have to be assertive and direct, you know. And if you want to fix anything, you have to go to the problem. You have to address the problem, identify who, what, why, you know, and I would recommend writing these things out and taking time to reflect. But then you have to be willing to do something about it. You know, the person that just keeps themselves in denial and they're too scared to communicate or address an issue, you're gonna make the problem worse over time. You're gonna continue with that behavior that you know you shouldn't do. You're entitled, so you're justifying the fact that you're doing it. And ultimately you're gonna sabotage yourself and make certain parts of your life worse because of that. So I hope this message reached someone that needed to hear it. I know a lot of people out there, like myself in the past, who struggle with addiction, who struggle with these coping behaviors, this pleasure-seeking behavior that in the moment feels good, in the moment numbs out some pain or creates this feel inside of you that you're longing. But long term, it makes you a lesser version of yourself, it makes you weaker, and it's gonna compromise the results in the life that you truly want. So, you guys, do me a favor, share this message with someone that you know needs to hear it. Like I said, share, like, comment, subscribe. Do do your best to support this channel. Let's reach more people with this message. I appreciate you. Have an amazing rest of your day.