EP 06: MMIP Activism, Grief, and Commitment With Runner and Advocate Jordan Marie Brings Three White Horses Whetstone (Part 1)

Welcome to Episode 6 of Supersede! 

Today, Madeleine is joined by runner and activist Jordan Marie Brings Three White Horses Whetstone in an episode that honors our need to make spaces both for thriving, and for heartbreak and pain. In part one of this two-part conversation highlighting Jordan’s journey as an activist fighting to honor Missing and Murdered Indigenous People, Jordan reminds us the value in showing up for movements and letting them transform you. 

In her work with Rising Hearts, Jordan has honored her calling to build community and bring people together. As she discusses this work, Jordan explains her journey of grief and growth as she ran the Boston Marathon in 2019 in dedication to MMIP and their families. Jordan’s commitment to running with purpose while still caring for her wellbeing emphasizes the importance of prioritizing our humanity within organizing work. 

May 5th, the day we are airing this episode, is National Missing and Murdered Indigenous Peoples (MMIP) Awareness Day. Supersede urges listeners to show up for MMIP throughout the year. To get involved with Jordan’s work, visit  https://www.risinghearts.org/ and sign up for the 2023 Running For Justice virtual and in person races at https://events.elitefeats.com/23justice.

Jordan Marie Brings Three White Horses Whetstone, a member of the Lower Brule Sioux Tribe, is a fourth generation runner, athlete advocate, community organizer, project manager, filmmaker, founder of Rising Hearts and a new mom. Since the 2019 Boston Marathon, she uses her platform - #RunningForJustice, to help raise awareness of missing and murdered Indigenous relatives by dedicating the miles she runs to a missing or murdered Indigenous person - their families, survivors and advocates. Jordan is committed to helping make the running and community spaces a more equitable, safe, visible, supportive, diverse, inclusive, affordable and accessible place for people today and the next generations. 

Jordan's Socials
Instagram: @nativein_la / @rising_hearts
Twitter: @_nativeinla

Seeding Sovereignty's Socials
Instagram/TikTok/Twitter/YouTube: @seedingsovereignty
Website: www.seedingsovereignty.org

Madeleine's Socials
Instagram/TikTok: @madeleinemacgillivray
Website: www.madeleinemacgillivray.com

Credits
This episode was edited by Madeleine MacGillivray. Theme music was written by Luke Poulsen and recorded by Madeleine MacGillivray and Luke Poulsen. Episode description by Julia Jackson.

Transcript

Madeleine:
Okay, hi Jordan, welcome to the podcast.

Jordan:
Hi, thanks for having me.

Madeleine:
Thank you so much for being on and having this conversation. I just want to kind of start off by having you talk about just who you are and what you're working on now. Just give the listener some background on you.

Jordan:
Yeah, my name is Jordan Marie Brings Three White Horses, what's known now. People know me as mostly Jordan Marie Daniel, but got married last summer. And yeah, I'm the founder and organizer of Rising Hearts. I'm a professional runner and athlete advocate, really kind of braiding together both of my passions and my love of running, but also my love and passion of advocacy, especially for missing and murdered indigenous peoples. I'm a project manager at UCLA. I am a filmmaker. I am a consultant on justice, equity, diversity, and inclusion. And yeah, I just really love, I think primarily the common thread throughout all of that, all the titles that I just named is really bringing community together. And that's something that's been, I feel like ingrained in me since I was little, always just like rallying up my little cousins and friends and either being bossy of them or more playfulness. And then as I've grown up, it's just something that... I really gravitated to is like trying to find ways to bring us together. And as I've grown up and we've seen this injustice that we're seeing today in society happening right now in the last several years, especially, especially since Standing Rock, is that as an advocate myself and a community organizer, I felt like I was being kind of siloed within my own kind of advocacy track of, you know, only focusing on Indigenous peoples and rights. And that's super important to me. And that's how I began, is really focusing on indigenous rights. And I think that's how we all kind of begin. And when we're becoming advocates is like, we kind of find what we're passionate about and who we're passionate about. And it's kind of like our only track. But ever since the murder of George Floyd, I really felt it important to kind of reflect on the teachings that my dad and family have taught me. And through ceremony is mataku yeoyasin, we are all related. and seeing that we are as people, all people, not just indigenous, that we are related, that we are kin, and that we aren't above or below each other or any living entity on this planet, and that we need to live in reciprocity. And so that is something that really inspired me and motivated me to kind of change my advocacy and also pivot rising hearts in a lot of the work that we are doing to kind of reflect that work. And so... But Takuya Yasen to me and how I've grown up is that's like the first indigenous intersectionality term that I've been raised with. And so I wanted myself and I wanted my advocacy work through Rising Hearts to embody that. And so we started creating programming that was more intersectional. We wanted to be a pro organization that really could be a good relative in being. you know, an advocate, a platform to amplify other community voices and really taking that opportunity to learn from other communities, other frontline groups who are experiencing racism, who are experiencing oppression, who are experiencing, you know, the effects and consequences sadly of colonialism. And we're experiencing it in different ways, but I think it's super important if we're gonna have that thriving future for our next generations that we need to sit, listen and learn from each other. and really activate those grassroots. And I think that's really the key and the power in the change that I think that we're all trying to fight for. And so since the murder of George Floyd, that's where we really try to change to create that pathway for more than just indigenous peoples to be part of this advocacy work, to be exposed to different perspectives and different community voices that, you know, are doing incredible things that not only of what they're like fighting for and trying to bring like awareness to, but also like what they're thriving at. And I think that's equally as important to have that balance. So people can see the joy that they can see the laughter and the happiness that, you know, we all have within our communities that resilience, but also there's a reason for that. And that's also the other side of it, the hard, the heartache, the tragedy, the really troubling issues that we have to deal with and that we're trying to change. So. That's who I am. That's what motivates me. And now the biggest motivator is I'm a mom and I have a son and he is 15 months old and wild and already running everywhere. So I'm always constantly chasing after him. But he is also like my biggest inspiration. And like, this is the reason why I do this work to bring people together to have that change so that he can be himself that he hopefully doesn't have to carry on like all of what we're doing and trying to impact change that. he and the next generations can unapologetically be themselves and they can be visible and supported.

Madeleine:
I have so much to say in response to all of what you just said because

Jordan:
And so it's the same.

Madeleine:
you...

Jordan:
It's the same as the sentence.

Madeleine:
Oh, I'm hearing an echo. Oh no, hold on. Let me fix that. That was so beautiful. I have... Oh, it's okay. Yeah, I have so much to say in response to what you just said. I first just want to... Because we could talk about kind of an unpack. every sort of aspect of what you just talked about so eloquently throughout the entire episode. I want to start with just like you giving the listener a little bit more background on what Rising Hearts does and sort of how that came to be and then we can go deeper.

Jordan:
Yeah, so Rising Hearts came about in January of 2017. So I really kind of came into the advocacy world, definitely not on purpose. I wanted to work on policy, work in DC. That was my dream to be the Indian Health Service Director. I wanted to impact change through policy because... I guess I didn't know any better. And I guess when you're young and naive and like, that was my eighth grade dream, that's what I thought. Like change equals like legislation. You got to be a lobbyist and like be out on the Hill. And so that was like my dream for so long and finally made it to DC and started working there. Um, but I had no intentions of like becoming a community organizer, like marches, rallies, like soapbox public speaking, all of that. It just like made my, like made me stick to my stomach. Um, but I had friends who you know, we're part of that community. And so I started showing up at the Reject and Protect, Stop KeyXL Pipeline, Cowboy Indian Alliance, and Indigenous Environmental Network back in like 2014, April, and just started learning from them. And that's where I really started to learn more about like climate injustice and how it's impacting Indigenous communities and, you know, just that kind of like domino effect of like all of these consequences and how it's impacting our ecosystems. And that's also where I first learned about what we now know as like the hashtags and the movement of like missing and murdered indigenous women and peoples and learning that it started in Canada with First Nations families and so on and so forth. And so that's where I first got exposed to it and learning about this epidemic of violence. And I had seen it and I thought it was more isolated incidents or that it was only in my community, but being part of those conversations and hearing advocates talk about this, that it's not an isolated incident. This is happening to so many indigenous peoples, families and communities. across Turtle Island and Eagle and Condor and basically everywhere where colonialism is. But I was like, oh man, this is so cool to be in community. We're marching. I'm learning. But I saw the behind the scenes of what it takes to make this event that brought thousands and thousands of people marching on the National Mall. I was like, that's a lot of work. I don't know if that's the kind of work I want to do. So I just started showing up and just being a volunteer, just showing up to learn and support and being solidarity. And so I started attending more and more in my first year of living in Washington, DC. And then, you know, we get to the summer of 2016 and that's when we start learning about what's happening in Standing Rock and the Standing Rock youth and the LaDonna Braveville Allard and just so many indigenous voices that were on the front lines talking about what was happening in this injustice. And then they were announcing that they were gonna do the 2000 mile run. from Cannonball to Washington DC. And a friend of mine had asked me, hey, you're a runner? And that's primarily how my identity has been, is Jordan the runner. So he was like, hey, you're a runner, you should do something for the youth when they come to DC and like welcome them. And I was like, ah, okay. And I was like, I've never done that, but I'll give it a try, how hard can it be? And luckily one of my friends joined me on this effort and we got the permitting all within like, six hours of the event. We were struggling so hard with figuring out what we had to do. We were crowdfunding to make sure we had food and water. We found a land blessing speaker. We found drum performers. We were just trying to make sure we had everything. And then all of a sudden, last second, the youth show up. All of a sudden, all of the police escorts show up and we had no idea that they were coming, but we were so happy that that's what we kept requesting and having everyone's safety. But it all turned out beautifully and like the whole day was all about the youth. And we ran from the Supreme Court to the Army Corps of Engineer Headquarters. And we stayed out there for a few hours and trying to have conversations with people who were coming in and out of that space. And it was just really inspiring to watch the youth, especially as little as like my son, like barely walking. you know, doing the little like circles and like being part of this run walk and like babies being pushed in strollers to, you know, our elders running and walking with us. And it was just super inspiring to see community. And so I go home that day and I tell my friend as she's dropping me off, I'm like, I'm never doing this again. Like it was so stressful. And I was like, I'm glad it went off well with like no glitches or anything. Like everything went perfect, but I don't want to do that again. I just want to show up and like help support. And then three weeks later, I see the same youth that I had met being attacked by dogs and some of the elders that I had seen. That's what motivated me to want to honor my grandfather's legacy because he had also passed away in that time. And I was kind of conflicted with like, what is my life? I just lost my superhero and lost him to cancer and just didn't. And he's also the first one that took me running for the first time. So. I was just really at a crossroads of like giving up on running and kind of giving up on this like path that I've been so passionate about and that also connected me directly to him. And so he was a big youth advocate and it just kind of this full circle of like, no, I can keep doing what I'm doing and I can honor him in the best way that I can. And that's carrying on his legacy of investing in our youth and supporting them. And this is how I'll continue to mourn and heal is by... being with youth and supporting this movement and helping as much as possible. So I like threw all of my emotions and like grief into this like new found like advocacy arm that I was like doing. And so I started doing pop-up marches and rallies and started showing up at the White House and like inserting myself into these community grassroot organizing groups that, you know, didn't have indigenous representation in them. And so that's what sparked Rising Hearts. I, we needed an advocacy group in DC. that was Indigenous-led, that we could start facilitating these conversations, that we can have this representation on these stages, and make sure that when Indigenous peoples are coming here to D.C., that they also feel like they have family here and that they feel supported. So that's where Rising Hearts came about, was, you know, increasing that representation within the grassroots movement in D.C. And so we started collaborating with all of our partners in D.C. We started collaborating with national partners. like Indigenous Environmental Network and Native Organizers Alliance, and started organizing marches and rallies and that we had huge turnouts and we were part of the 2017 People's Climate March where we got over 200,000 people in DC. And it was just incredible work and it was incredible opportunity to help bring community together and that's something that I really like love doing and now I haven't like left that track of like. knowing how to multitask, working really fast, having your days be super long, conference calls, meetings, and showing up to things. And it was just kind of like a blessing in disguise and something that was really unexpected that I had no intention of wanting to be someone behind a soapbox or on a soapbox or behind that microphone or the bullhorn. But over time, I think when you become an advocate and you get more confident. and knowledgeable in the things that you're advocating for. It becomes so much easier to communicate that and to stand in front of thousands, to speak truth to power. And it just got easier and easier. And it was really amazing to see community with me that was also using their voices. And we're all rising up together. And I think that was just, I love DC. And that was like one of the best times of my life. And it's brought me here today in the work that I'm doing and how Rising Hearts has grown. as an organization, but also me as an advocate personally.

Madeleine:
That I feel like, again, there's so much unpacked there. And thank you for like taking us through all of that because I think that as someone who, you know, has had their own journey and you've had such a journey and we're all just on our own individual and collective journeys in like. sort of this existential but joyful and curious and painful path of figuring out and learning about ourselves and the ways that we can enact change in the ways that are best for us. You're illustrating how that has happened for you. And I think that's really helpful for a lot of people to hear. Oftentimes there is a situation that we kind of find ourselves in like you in DC where you were really being pushed really hard and it was a dream of yours and you had this really intense motivation to do one type of thing and then you learn what the reality looks like but that brought you to a place of growth and figuring out kind of... how you can use those skills, you know, or use that experience to continue with your work in a way that is unexpected for you, as you just said. To me, sort of looking at your work and seeing what you do, it's very, it seems very natural, you know, it's like you, it feels like you're meant to do this kind of work. Do you feel that way? Do you feel like, yeah.

Jordan:
Yeah, I would say another part of that that has deeper meaning is when I went through my coming of age ceremony and got my name, Chinggwetch Gawweshtewi, it translates to basically, you know, making the sacred hoop whole again and like bringing people together. And for so long, when I got that, I think I was 12 years old, I always felt like it was a big name that carried a lot of responsibility. And it always kind of scared me. And I always kind of felt like it was the wrong name for me. Because I felt like up until that point, like I wasn't living up to that. And it didn't happen until I was older. It didn't happen until the work that I started doing to help Standing Rock and all of the advocates that it was a full circle moment. It was like, I can't remember. I think we were planning for the People's Climate March. And we We wanted to do more work of like, not just have the march and rally end with amazing speakers, guests line up. We wanted to throw a community round dance after that. We wanted to have a big potluck and like feed everybody and have a drum group and like a small powwow. And we get to the powwow and it's just like, it's crowded. It's so crowded with not just indigenous peoples, but like allies, friends and... I'm making fry bread and it's that moment in Smoke Signals where she like rips the fry bread in half because like they had run out and like that's what happened to us. Like we ran out and like our friends are trying to like get more supplies for us so we can make more. And I started ripping them in half and I just started laughing. And I was like, I feel like, you know, in the movie Smoke Signals, but, and I like look out and I look at the head count and I'm just like. damn, I am so grateful to be part of this community. And I just started tearing up at seeing what we all did together to make this happen. And that's where I was like, I feel like I've lived up to my name. I feel like I've earned it now. I feel like I'm walking that path that I always thought I couldn't get to. And it was like, I started tearing up because I just finally felt like. I earned it and that it was meant to be and that it didn't mean that you had to be on that path right away, that it takes time. And so I'm someone who's not always great with patience and having that understanding and getting to understand that in that way. So yeah, it was just like a full circle moment of laughter, but also just seriousness of like, okay, I don't need to worry anymore. I am meant to be doing what I'm doing and this is where my heart wants to be and this is what makes me happiest even though it can be really stressful and really emotional at the same time but it's what I'm meant to be doing and I think that the biggest component out of all that is just being in community is the most important thing to me.

Madeleine:
Yeah, yeah, that has come up and continues to come up and will continue to come up just the idea that community is really like one of or the kind of antidote to just a lot of what we're facing. I talk about that in particular in regards to climate emotions around climate injustice and I think that the way that you have kind of grown to be able to sort of grown into your, you know, passions in this way is really beautiful and a testament to how it's like a lifelong, you know, path. And if you felt like you, cause I feel like you're also still quite, you know, like. early on, we're all, I feel like always kind of early on in our journeys, kind of always having like this level of curiosity. And I feel like, you know, for you to come into this realization and have had that like moment of like, okay, I feel like I'm living up to my, you know, my name and my, you know, sort of like path at that point in time is even relatively early on almost. But yeah, it's really cool to hear that sort of that's how that went for you. I want to talk a little bit of yeah, do you have anything to say in response to that?

Jordan:
I don't know, I totally agree with you. I think that it's just, I hope everyone in their life feels that way. Cause I know I've talked to so many people, even within the advocacy movement, that they still sometimes feel lost or that they haven't found that moment. And I always get that question asked to me a lot. It's like, what is your advice for the next generation of advocates and community organizers? And I'm like, one, prioritize self care. Make that super important into the work that you're doing. And... Become knowledgeable in what you're advocating for and continue to keep learning because it's always gonna be changing and evolving. But don't put the pressure on yourself to feel like you have to have that profound moment, that aha moment. And it might take so long and you might find it right away. It might be something that you were born into and for so many people within the climate, social racial justice movements, some of us are born into it. It's not like we had a choice. And I think just people need to realize that, you know, it takes time and just have grace with yourself and patience with yourself and that don't be too hard on yourself. And we're all going to make mistakes. We're all going to keep learning. But that's definitely something that I can't stress enough when I am, you know, I have these opportunities where, you know, I have kids asking to interview me and they're in middle school or in high school, or I have people in their PhD programs or their master programs wanting to interview me. And I think it's so incredible and amazing, but I also can't emphasize enough of like, you know, enjoy your life and the things that you're part of and doing. And when it comes down to like, if it's enough is enough and like, I can't tolerate this anymore, like I have to do something, then that's the moment where you take those steps of like, I need to learn about this. I need to learn how to communicate in my own way, whether that's verbally, visually, audibly, you know, through art, through music, however it is. And then, you know, make sure that you're taking care of yourself in that process so that you can continue to do it, you know, for however long you want to or need to be doing it.

Madeleine:
I completely agree with that and that's something that we talk about. Also on this podcast is like sort of the idea that if it's possible, like if it's accessible to you to put yourself first and like self preserve and have work that actually makes you really happy. Because this is such a long game thing, right? It's not like you just do this for. a little part of your life, it really is intrinsic to like a way of life. And it's, and so if you're going to be doing it your whole life, it's like you have to be like fulfilled by it and happy and it has to it has to replenish you in some way. And, and I think, unfortunately, that's, you know, something that a lot of people, I think kind of you climate justice work or social justice work. as something that is extremely draining because it is. It's literally fighting for survival and yet finding ways to self preserve is actually what makes it really beautiful. I'm curious, how do you do that? What are your ways of self preservation?

Jordan:
Um, so now that I become a mom, it's actually been, um, a lot easier for me to take more time for myself. Before it was always like, I never took days off with running. I especially now that I've intersected my running with advocacy, I kind of felt even more like I had to keep running. I had to keep, um, you know, bringing awareness to the things that I'm running for and who I'm running for in those ways. But, um, you know, it's me. having more time with my family and listening to my body and like if I'm just really tired and exhausted today like why force trying to go run why force you know doing some of these things and luckily I work with really awesome people and all of the avenues of work that I do and if I need to like cancel meetings even if it's last minute they are so understanding and like they know all that I'm trying to do and all the hats that I'm trying to wear and so sometimes I just have to like Today's too busy of a day for me. I can only do half of these meetings and I'm gonna take today off from running. And it's like taking those in practice and trying to cook more and trying to just be outside as much as possible. Like my son is much like me. If I'm getting too overwhelmed or anxious or even depressed, just like going outside and being out there and disconnecting just re-clears my whole body and my whole mindset sometimes and it does for him too. So I'm really happy that hopefully he has that connection with nature that we always try to have with our family. And just like coloring. I love the mandala colorings. Something that I can lose focus in patterns and all of that kind of stuff. And so I try to do that every now and again when I'm writing or answering emails or just trying to do a lot of work. I'll always try and keep a coloring book and some pens. like in my backpack or at the desk with me and like, I need to take a break and I'll just like start coloring and doodling for a while. But yeah, it's how I am able to try to sustainably and consistently take care of myself and like make it into an everyday practice rather than like, I'm working really hard for a month and then I'm just like burnt out and then I need to take like one to two weeks off. And that's not like sustainable in my head and in my opinion. So I'm trying to integrate these little things in each day of my life a little bit more.

Madeleine:
Yeah, I love that and I relate to all of those. And I'm also thinking about how healing and like multi-generational healing has been so central to MMIP and your work with MMIP. And so speaking of healing, I mean, you already touched on this a little bit, but just like sort of how does that factor into your work with MMIP? How do you incorporate healing? into your work.

Jordan:
It's a

Madeleine:
I'm

Jordan:
lie.

Madeleine:
sorry.

Jordan:
I've had to go back to therapy. You know, I was going to therapy when I was in DC, and then I started going back a little bit kind of sporadically, not super consistent in my first year of living in Los Angeles. But then after the prayer run in 2019 at the Boston Marathon, every single race that I had done after that was dedicated to Missing and Merged Indigenous peoples and, you know, having... being connected to the families and learning their stories was really hard. And I'm someone who before that, when I would have a race and have something to train for, I was like, I was in a good mood. I had my like specific things I had to do, my kind of like superstitious things that had to happen and my music playlist and like everything that I had to do to execute a race like perfectly into the training plan. But since I had started bringing my advocacy into my running, I was going into these races mentally and emotionally exhausted and really triggered. And being a survivor of violence and sexual assault myself, and having to constantly tell my story about the Boston Pair Run and talking about the statistics, talking about who I ran for was really triggering. So I was going into every single run. kind of just really triggered and really anxious and depressed and the rest of 2019, I, by the end of that fall, I was in like really bad depression and running wasn't what it used to be for me anymore. And finally, I was like, you know what? I need to end the year on a good note. I need to try and have fun with a run, even if it's with intentions and purpose, I just still need to get out there and not let it get to me in this way. So I had... done a trail championships race and like jumped into it and had a better connection with running. And I was like, okay, good, I'm going to leave it on that note. And I need to take time off. And so after that going into 2020, I took almost two and a half months off of running. I hardly ever take a day off a month hardly. And so it was literally every day I was asking myself the question, are you ready to run today? Nope. Okay, we're not going to run. And it took two and a half months to finally say yes. And in that time too, I was like, I need to find a way to safely and healthily like communicate what is happening to me with someone that understands this. And so it was the first time ever that I had an indigenous therapist, someone who was from our communities and someone who I saw myself in and someone who knows. what I'm talking about and not like gaslighting me in the process because they are not indigenous and they just, you know, would belittle everything that I would try and say. So it was really nice to have that support system. And so we were working really hard on the anxiety and on the triggers and working really hard on creating a invisible toolbox for myself to pull out these specific. things that I needed in these specific moments when they were happening or about to happen, that I could calm myself down or talk myself down and create safe spaces for me to go and decompress, to unplug myself from the talking platforms to having to be in these very visible spaces and to learn how to still run with intention and with purpose and for justice. but also still enjoy that run for me. And it took a long time. It took all 2020 to really kind of master that. And I feel like I've got there and I was able to do that this year at the 2023 Boston Marathon. And I think it's just, you know, it's prioritizing your healthcare and your wellbeing in that process and having to not ignore. physically what your body is trying to communicate to you. Cause I was doing that for so long in 2019 that it just kind of all came to a flood head gate of unreleasing like all of these emotions. And yeah, it just, it took a lot of practice and it takes time. And especially if you are someone who has experienced violence and is, you know, I suppressed that trauma for so long and I thought I was perfect and fine. But then until I started running for Missing and Murdered Indigenous Peoples, that all came out of the woodworks. And I was like, I guess I'm not healed. So I guess just pretending that everything is OK and telling myself that happened X amount of years ago that that's the case. So it's having to confront yourself and being honest with yourself, I think, always the hardest part, maybe for me, maybe for anyone. But yeah, it's now just being mindful of how much I'm taking on. Now that there are so many other amazing advocates within this space and athlete advocates doing the same thing like me, I don't always need to be the one talking about this. There are so many other people that can talk to this issue and that are bringing visibility to it. And at first it always felt like I was the only one doing it for a while. And then I started seeing more athletes rise up and doing the same thing. And I think that's just the part of the community that we're inspiring each other. we're motivating each other to do something. And I think that's, you know, the beauty in all of that.