Ep. 19 Surviving Domestic Violence: How She Took Her Power Back

TRIGGER WARNING: This episode will be discussing topics surrounding Domestic Violence.

We’re joined by Becca, owner of Blink By Becca in Latham, New York, as she shares her domestic violence survivor story with honesty and care. We talk about how an early teen relationship turns into coercive control: the slow isolation, the rules about clothing and makeup, the broken phones, the sabotage of work, and the constant pressure to question your own reality. Becca names what so many people feel but struggle to say out loud, that you can be self-aware and still get trapped when fear, shame, and hope keep pulling you back.

Takeaways

• Social media has transformed relationships into content and performance.
• Influencers face immense pressure to maintain a perfect image.
• The audience's expectations can create a toxic environment for influencers.
• Relationships can become transactional when tied to social media engagement.
• Influencer culture can lead to unrealistic standards for parenting and family life.
• The psychological impact of social media can lead to feelings of inadequacy and depression.
• Taking breaks from social media is essential for mental health.
• Authenticity is crucial in navigating the influencer landscape.
• Influencer moms often feel pressured to present an idealized version of motherhood.
• Comparison to curated lives can distort personal realities. 

About Becca:
Matt is a therapist, an author, toxic relationship specialist, and podcaster. He is a social media influencer that has recently put his focus on "Criminal Motives". This is where he dives into true crime stories and provides his perspective.

Connect with Becca

Instagram
Website

Linktree

Resources

• National Domestic Violence Hotline
• YWCA Domestic Violence Support
• Blink by Becca
• Mom is My Emergency Contact Podcast

Host:
Lisa

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Transcript

Meeting Becca And Her Work

SPEAKER_00 0:17

Welcome to Mom is my emergency contact podcast, Real Conversations, No Filter. I am Lisa, your host. Before we begin today's episode, I want to offer a gentle but important trigger warning. In this conversation, we'll be discussing domestic violence, including emotional and physical abuse. Some of the experiences shared may be difficult to hear, especially if you've lived through something similar. Please take care of yourself while listening. Pause if you need to, step away if you need to. Your nervous system matters more than any podcast episode. Today I am honored to sit with a woman who has survived domestic violence and who is courageously choosing to share her story, not for shock value, not for drama, but for truth, for awareness. For the woman listening right now who may feel alone, confused, or questioning her reality, this is not just a story about abuse. It's a story about survival, about reclaiming power, about what it looks like to walk through fear and still choose yourself. If you're ready, let's begin. So we have Becca. She is the owner of Blink by Becca in Latham, New York. She is a survivor of domestic violence. Um, she's a mother of two wife and has been working tirelessly on her own healing journey by creating a safe space for others while enhancing their inner and outer beauty. Thank you, Becca, for being here.

SPEAKER_01 1:48

Thank you for having me.

Building Blink By Becca

SPEAKER_00 1:50

I'm excited. I'm excited too. So just to give the listeners some background, I came across Becca um, because she's part of a bigger network of women entrepreneurs, and she posted um a post that I looked at it, I'm like, okay, there's a lot of words in here. What's going on here? I read it and I was literally um in awe because you know, you never think who has experienced something like this. And it was such a raw story. It was your truth and it was empowering and it moved me. And then I reached out to her and I'm like, oh, I I would love for you to talk about it on the show. So um, Becca, before we get into your story, I wanted to ask you more about your business. So Blink by Becca, what is that?

SPEAKER_01 2:46

So Blink is something that I started in 2024. Um, and it is it stands for Brows Lashes Ink. So I do all sorts of brow services, lash services, and then I do permanent makeup. And then this past year I recently got into like minimal tattooing, um, not like huge pieces, but you know, just the occasional small, tiny tat.

SPEAKER_00 3:16

How did you get into this?

SPEAKER_01 3:17

So um I started with cosmetology school in 11th and 12th grade. My mom was a hairdresser for, I mean, it's been well over 40 years now. So we always had a salon in the house. Um she was doing my hair and nails since a young age. And I kind of just realized that that's what I wanted to do. Not just like the beauty aspect, but her clients were family to her. And like we had a small shop in my house growing up, and all of her clients, I mean, they were like older little ladies, and and they soon became like when she had me and my brothers, it was they were kind of like extended family, they would watch us while she worked on another client, and like it was just very it was nice, it was a close-knit thing. And then I ended up going to work with her all the time when she finally um when we got older, and she branched out to having a salon and and different things like that, and then one thing that she used that really inspired me, I guess. She worked in salons for years, but then when she got older, she really wanted to use it for a purpose. She she worked in an Alzheimer's assistant living home doing everyone's hair. And I would go with her and I would do their nails, like little like like manicures and stuff. And I was probably like 12 at that point. So, and then uh she also worked for I think 16 or 18 years at the VA hospital. Um, she was like the barber, the men called her. So she she always wanted, she was like wanted to be in that kind of setting. And I loved going with her. So I went to aesthetic school in 2015. But at that point in my life, when it kind of took a turn, my ex-boyfriend, we were together in high school, and then my senior year we broke up, but I dated someone else, and he ended up that guy ended up cheating on me. So after high school, I reconnected with the old ex-boyfriend, and um that was when I was starting aesthetic school and working as a hairdresser on the side, and everything kind of just took a turn. So it was very hard.

SPEAKER_00 6:03

Wow. I mean, your mother, wow, that's crazy. That's so that's just such a beautiful thing. And for you to see that and be involved in it, you doing the nails at oh my god, how cute is that? Your mom sounds amazing, and for you to see that. And I can now see why, you know, in even in your business, and I see your post, like you said, it's not just beauty, but you're really looking for a woman to leave or person to leave you feeling amazing. And I I love that about you. But um, obviously you have a story to tell, and you know, I said to you, just tell the story. So wherever you feel is the most appropriate point to begin, that's where you begin.

Proposal Night Turns Physical

SPEAKER_01 6:49

So I met him uh when I was actually 13 years old. Looking back now, I was a child, you know, and I I have like a November birthday, so I started school when I was young, like younger. Um so I was turning 14 in ninth grade. So I met him the first month of high school, and it was kind of like at first he wasn't someone that I was into. I was really into like the scene boys, like the emo boys, and this guy was you know muscular, and he already had a tattoo at 15, and like he was just not something that I was typically into, and but something about it, he asked me to the homecoming dance, the first dance of the year, and I said yes, and it was kind of after that that he I think he just didn't let me go, like he just like was like you know, claws in right away. And at that point, it was like the manipulation, the controlling why are you hanging out with these people and stuff like that. And he was also a smoker at 15, and he he just wasn't a good student, he had the bad boy reputation. Um he was constantly breaking up with me, like every other week, and I guess that just kind of hooked me because I was like, well, I can prove to him that you know I really do want this, and I and it was just an ongoing thing um for years until I was going into my uh senior year, and I met a boy, and we started dating, and I was like, oh my god, he's gonna like get me away from this toxic relationship. And that relationship was really great. It was we were best friends, um, and he had a broken home life. My parents took him in as another son, and we had a really great relationship until we didn't, and it was like after a year and a half, out of nowhere, I was I was like getting this rental property set up for us to move in together when I graduated high school, and my brother stopped by, and my brother was at Siena College at the time, and he told me that he had seen my boyfriend partying at Siena, and he was sleeping in some dorm rooms. I was heartbroken, absolutely devastated. I mean, I thought we were gonna get married and like all of this. I was just completely devastated. Um, and that's when my ex found out and he reached out to me and immediately got back together. Uh he asked my mom to propose to me. I was 18. Um, and she said no. He didn't ask my dad because he knew that my dad would say no. Um, my mom said, you know, she just got out of a relationship. She's not ready. She's 18 years old. Like, what are you doing? He didn't listen, of course. He still proposed to me. Um I said yes. And that's when it I felt like, oh my god, I finally got him. Like I we're meant to be together. He's my first love. Like, I was just so happy. And that's when it totally just changed. He I remember the first time that he ever got physical with me. It it was horrible. I mean, I try to piece together things, but the only things that I really remember is like the proposal and it was the same night. And then he got mad because I was still connected with my the the boy that I was dating, his family. I was going to a party, family party for like his cousin or something, and because me and his cousin were close. So, and then when I got back with my ex, he was upset that I was talking to this other guy's family, and that's when he I mean, I just remember like him on top of me, and there was like a corner of like like a doorway, and the corner of the doorway, like my head was like hit into the back of that, the tile on the kitchen floor. I mean, he was just my head was bouncing off of the tile. Um and I that I ran for my life that night.

SPEAKER_00 12:32

This is the this is the same night he asked you to marry him. So, and was he like like punching you?

Isolation And Total Control

SPEAKER_01 12:39

And he was not punching, his thing was like holding me down, he would grab my face so hard that I would have marks and bruises strangling. That was his thing, and just like I remember he took my foot one time and like hit himself with my foot. I thought my ankle broke, I thought my and my heel bone. I was like, that hurt so bad. But that was years later. Um but this night, and I I just we were living with his brother at the time, and that was the other thing. He had me like move in right away, like he wanted full control, like everything. So we had been dating, he proposed, and there was like this door, like front door to the house that no one ever used, and it was kind of like in a secluded area outside, and I just remember sprinting to that and trying to unlock the door, and then I ran out, and his mom lived next door, and I she remembered like she came up and she heard me screaming. Um, and she told me right then and there, she's like, I need to drive you home. He he is just like his father, and he's never going to change. Wow. So that was I should have gone home, but I told her, I can't go home. I don't want my parents to know. Like, I just I was so embarrassed. Um, and then I don't really know what happened after that. I think I just I black things out, yeah. Of course. But um, yeah, that and that wasn't the first time that she told me that, you know, he's just like his father and he'll never change. So it was kind of like this knowing of you know, I I should get out of this, but at the same time, I was trying so hard because I was so in love with him, and I just I wanted things to be different, and I I wanted to have that like I'll fix you. And I mean, I've gone through a lot of therapy to realize that I've always been a fixer, and I think it comes from um I have an older brother that is a drug addict, and I've seen struggle with that, and you're always just hoping for them to change, and and it was just I was used to the chaotic and the yelling and the you know and so then when you know my boyfriend raised his voice to me, I didn't blink an eye. So looking back on that, I I noticed that now. And then at that time I was starting aesthetic school, and that was a very isolating point because he became so, and I don't know how it happened, it was just overnight that like I couldn't have a phone, I couldn't wear makeup, I couldn't wear leggings, I couldn't have a job that I had to quit. Um I did I did hair and he didn't want me doing men. Um and I just had to kind of step back. I had to get a job that was approved by him. Um I worked and I'm I'm thankful for the experience that I did, but I worked with um as a direct support professional for like people with disabilities, and and that was it was a good job, but I wasn't able to uh work it to my to the fulfillment that I I wanted to, um because I was always late because he was driving me and I was, you know, oh his car was messed up this day, so then I couldn't get to work. So eventually I got fired, and I told him like I need to go back to doing hair. Like it's it's just not that's just what I need to do. And it was just a fight every day, and then going to school, um, aesthetic school. I didn't want to get close to anyone because I just I didn't want to explain anything. And it was just it was very hard. And the school was actually right across the street from where we were living, so he could keep an eye on me, and he knew when I was leaving school, and he just like always knew where I was. I mean, it was before you could track the iPhones and stuff, but I mean, he would just need to make sure what I was doing at all all times. But then, of course, he was, you know, cheating and behind my back doing this and that. And it was just a very one one way.

SPEAKER_00 18:15

And um, did you let me just um ask you one question? Um, when he was having these controlling behaviors, from your perspective, what were you thinking about that? Were you thinking, wow, he's really controlling, or were you thinking that he cared?

SPEAKER_01 18:36

No, I always knew it was controlling. I knew I that's one thing that I'm very proud of that I'm self-aware. And I I know when things are wrong, and I knew things were wrong right away. I knew that no man should ever tell me what to do. And you know, I wasn't going out with my cleavage down to my belly button. I was wearing a a sweatshirt and leggings, and then and I always had acne, so to not be able to wear makeup, that was a huge thing for me because he he just wanted to strip me down so much where I just didn't even feel pretty myself. Um, and and I was just so embarrassed because I know I mean my mom would show up to the house that we were staying in, and she would beg me to come home, and that broke my heart because I've always been like it's me and my mom, like we are best friends. And for him to do that, and he knew what he was doing, he was putting a wedge in between us because he knew how close we were, and I think there was a lot of jealousy over the years as well because he didn't have a family like mine. Um, and he he didn't want me to have that. So, and she would always ask me, like, what are you doing? Why oh you know, you need to take a shower. Like, you you look like what is going on? And then it was wasn't until like my phones were getting broken, my laptop that my dad bought me was broken. And then that's when my parents were like, okay, something's going on. Like, but they couldn't convince me to go home. Because if I did, it would just be constant blowing up my phone. I'm gonna change. I promise this, and I promise that, and then I would fall for it. And then it would just go right back to normal.

SPEAKER_00 21:00

Did they know the extent at any that during that period? Did they know that he already put his hands on you? Did they know any of that? No.

SPEAKER_01 21:09

Wow, they just thought he was controlling. Um, it wasn't until we I the last night that I ever saw him that they knew.

SPEAKER_00 21:21

Wow. And how long from the first time, just to give people like a timeline of how long this relationship was, because you're saying that it was it was off and on, con continuously uh abusive. So how long from the first time he hurt put his hands on you to the moment where you're like I'm I'm out?

SPEAKER_01 21:45

And then I left him in two thousand seventeen.

SPEAKER_00 21:52

Okay. So it was a c it was years, not like a m coup a year. Yeah. Okay. And through that entire time it was Him hurting you in some fashion. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 22:03

Yeah.

Planning A Final Break

SPEAKER_00 22:04

Alright. So let's go to that night where you it was the last time you saw him and kind of just give the listeners a sense of how did that big day begin and and to into the point where you left.

The Truck Ride And The Hit

SPEAKER_01 22:17

I had to get to a point where I finally realized like I have to just call it quits and I have to I had to do something to make him hate me because I didn't trust myself to not go back at the time. Wow. Like, why am I putting myself through this? Right. And and I I knew that I never wanted him to be the father of my children. There was no way that I could forget what he's done to me. And I've always wanted to, I've wanted to be a mom since I was young. I just that was my goal to find my husband and have kids. And when I started realizing that too, I was like, yeah, what am I doing? And I started going to church with my mom again. I mean, there was something really powerful that happened at church that I was like, just another thing. Like, and so he left, and I was saying at home with my parents. He showed up in my driveway drunk one night and was just, you know, up and down, and I'm all changed and this and that. And and but I I could tell that he was drunk, and he told me to come outside, and I just wanted to get him off of the property. So I went outside, and I should have never gotten in that truck because he was drunk. And he immediately when I got in, he pulled out of the driveway. And then we were driving around. I was like, What are you doing? Like, bring me, bring me home. And he was driving crazy. So I don't know if I told him to like, yeah, bring me back and I'll like get my bag or something. But I just I had to get out of there. And so he he brought me back, and I was about to get out of the truck, and he I went to like check something on my phone, and he went and grab like went to grab my phone, and I snapped because he has grabbed my phone so many times. He has broken so many phones of mine. And I looked at him and I said, Don't you ever touch my phone or my property ever again? And then he backhanded me, and I he broke a blood vessel in my eye. So I had to like just calm down, and I was like, let me out of the trunk because the truck was locked. And I ran inside and I was crying, and and at that point, my mom saw my eye, and you know, my face was already like swelling up, and and I couldn't hide it anymore. So he had words with my dad, the cops were called, and I went down to the police station that night and got a restraining order, but it turns out I already had a restraining order against him from one of our previous fights that I totally like blacked out on.

SPEAKER_00 25:28

And so they just reissued that one. Wow. So then at that point you never saw him again.

Getting The Car Back Safely

SPEAKER_01 25:36

I had to with my dad. So I had at my car at the time, he had his webs into everything that I owned and everything. We had dogs together. It was, yeah, just everything was entangled. And he, when I got my new car, he immediately took it as his own. It was in my name. The loan was both of our names, but the registration and the insurance was in my name. Um, and he it didn't have like a front plate bracket on the front, so I just I never put the front plate on. It's kind of like a sportier car. And he held my car from me because he was driving it every day. I never drove my car because once I got it, that was his car. And so my dad and I had to show up with the police to get my car and to get um the plate for it. And then after that, I had to contact him about one of our dogs had a vet bill, and we had to figure that out. And then eventually I was like, just I just didn't care. If anything was still like entangled with him, I just didn't care. I was like, well, like, not like the loan and stuff. My dad helped me refinance my car and stuff, but like little bills here and there. I'm like, that's his problem, he can figure it out. I blocked his phone number. And after that, I mean, but it never ends because he lives right a mile away from me. And now?

SPEAKER_00 27:19

Mm-hmm. Did he move? Mm-hmm. Girl.

SPEAKER_01 27:23

Yeah. Because where we were living with his brother, it has like um his mom's house, his brother's house, and then he bought the house right in front of them. And but he bought it after my husband and I bought my childhood home. Oh. So, like, we've always been very close in proximity, but he moved away, like he was like up and on the mountain somewhere, and like, and then I find out that he bought a house right down the road for me. And so I still like I see him drive by all the time. He has the audacity, if I'm outside with my kids, to beep at me. Yeah. Okay, Becca.

Healing And Meeting Her Husband

SPEAKER_00 28:08

Okay, hold on. Yeah, all right. Before we go into that, Jesus Christ. Um girl, I know you are a strong woman, God. Um okay, so but then it the relationship ended and you had enough. And it's interesting. It's it's interesting when you you when you said I snapped, and it's like all these years of you submitting to him, and you're like, I'm done. Yeah. And um I feel like when you said I had to be a certain way to get what I wanted, you were on survival, survival mode. You were like, I need to get out of this truck. What do I need to say and do so I can get the fuck out? Yeah. And you did just that. Like, I think anybody would have done that to get out. And I'm glad that you know you did the therapy and you you went through that. And I can't imagine all the women who haven't done that. Um, but you took the you stood up for yourself and you said, you know what, I'm I'm gonna I want to heal. And you you did that, and that's something to be very proud of yourself. But moving forward, so now you're married, right? And you have kids. I you know, a lot of women who may still be in it or on their way out, their thought is always, how will I find somebody? And who would want someone like me? So can you talk a little bit from that period where you're doing your healing journey and then you met your your now husband?

SPEAKER_01 29:45

Yeah. Um, I guess it it was just always, I mean, from the first time that he hit me, I think uh deep down, I always knew like he's not he's not the one. And I didn't want to believe that. Um, but I always knew, I mean, I just trusted that God had my husband out there. Like I knew, I knew that there was someone out there, and I just had to find him. And I don't know how or why, but that was always on my mind that like that I wasn't in control, that I was like, well, I just I don't know how to explain it. Like, I just trusted that there is the perfect man out there for me. And I just haven't met him yet. But and like some people are like, oh, like, did you go out looking for him? No, I I had fun in the meantime, but I was very quickly aware that, like, okay, this guy that I'm talking to right now is not the one. Like, I was very like right away, I was like, no, not the one, not the one. And then I was like, I'm just gonna wait and see, like, he'll show up eventually. And then my husband slid into my DMs, and I was on his Instagram, and I saw a beard and a motorcycle and and some cars, and I saw a picture of him and his son, and I was like, I was like, oh, he's a dad, and he looked like a really good dad. So I was like, okay. I was like, so then we kind of met and hung out as like friends kind of first, and the first time I met him, then that turned into, do you want to go grab a drink? It turned into dinner, and then I invited him back to my parents' house for a bonfire, and we just were inseparable ever since. And I as soon as I was sitting down across from him at when we were having dinner, I was like, it this is so weird. Like, I'm talking to my best friend, like it was just very easy, and like, and I could tell he was just very genuine. He cared about his son, and like he was just he was also searching for that person to settle down with. And I was like, immediately I was like, this is him, this is this is my husband.

SPEAKER_00 32:30

Did um you know, the other question is that a lot of women feel like, how can I tell this guy that what I went through? Like, what did that feel like and what was his reaction?

SPEAKER_01 32:41

He was very comforting, and it was hard at first. I I don't know if I told him everything right away, but it was like I I know that I um told him certain things right away. Like, yes, it was physical abuse, and I never went into details until like we were a little further along, and and now I mean there's still things that'll come up that he's like, Oh, I you know, I you haven't told me that before. And I'm like, Oh, I haven't. Like, I there's just like still things, but he was very comforting, very just reassuring, and and I remember the first time that I went out that it was for my sister-in-law's bachelorette party, and I was wearing this dress that I like I felt really good in, and I I loved this dress. And he was complimenting me and like saying that I looked so good, and then I was like, Are you sure? Like, are you sure this is okay? And he was like, Yeah, why why wouldn't it be? And at that moment I was like, Oh my god, like he doesn't care what I wear. I was like, Oh my god, like so, and it's just so funny how your brain is, especially because I was so young, and like my brain was just programmed to this certain way of living, and I'm still working on like undoing it, but yeah, and but he was really, I mean, he's constantly just so supportive, and he's great, he's the best.

SPEAKER_00 34:32

That's good, that's good to hear. Uh, I think a lot of women feel like, you know, how could I share this um information with someone that I'm in love with and would he judge me?

SPEAKER_01 34:43

It's a a couple things that I was scared of that. Um, but he was and the way he reacted to those things, uh, it just reassured me even more that he was he was great.

SPEAKER_00 34:57

Yeah. The green flag was his behavior. Oh you said your truth, and his response was not judging, not criticizing, not leaving. Um, and that was the green flag to say, this is this is a person who's gonna support me. Yeah. So with all of that, you know, you're and I you know, I gotta ask to say this, you know, because I was gonna ask you, you know, where are you with everything? And I um appreciate your um your vulnerability of saying, I'm still working through it.

SPEAKER_01 35:31

Yeah. It's a I mean, it's a daily thing. It's I mean, the littlest thing will send me into like a like a flashback kind of thing. And then there's so many that times that I don't remember. I so I I know that subconsciously I've blocked out some things, but yeah, it's it's crazy.

Going Public And Helping Others

SPEAKER_00 35:57

Wow. Well, you know, the the good side of this is that there is obviously a I don't want to say happy ending because there is no ending, but is it's the fact that you got out. Like that that was the most important thing, and you found yourself, and now here you are telling your story. So what prompts you to share? I mean, social media is you're going through the mat, you're going, you're reaching the masses, you don't know who's gonna read it, but what prompts you to share that story, number one, and number two, how did you feel from the response?

SPEAKER_01 36:36

Um, so I with my clients over the years, I've shared things with them and connected with different people over my story. So it wasn't like I had never shared it before. Um, but I think like being a business owner now, and I wanted to give back to I've always wanted to somehow um connect with like the community with my business. And I was like, okay, how do I do that? What's something that's like near and dear to my heart? And I found uh the YWCA and I started doing like this um teddy bear project, it's I call it. Um and it was kind of this thing that I rolled out in October, Domestic Violence Month. So there was that, and I was like, well, if I'm gonna do this, I need to be authentic and share my story. And so I sat down and wrote it for probably a good week, and it was like I just wrote a little bit at a time. I was like, I'm not gonna try to like push this out immediately, but um I know that it's something that I wanted to do, and the response was great. It was, you know, some people knew, some people didn't know. Um, and I actually had some people reach out that are very close to him. Um, and yeah. There's his ex now. Um she had three children with him, and she reached out to me.

SPEAKER_00 38:34

And so we had like staying contact here and there. You bonded, bonded through that experience. Um let me ask you this. Uh, how did it make you feel?

SPEAKER_01 38:45

Oh my, it felt like a weight lifted off and empowering, and just like I kind of feel like there was me before that, and then like me after that. Like, because no, like I don't want to like I want to blast his name out there, but that's just like I don't that's just not me. I I think that that would be taken wrong. Um, and he smears his name plenty enough just by on his own. On his own. So I don't have to do that. But um there was uh when I started that fundraiser with the YWCA, I printed out flyers for the project that I was doing. And since we live very close to each other, I had my husband, because I I couldn't do it, I was too nervous. I had my husband go and put one up at the Stuarts right across from his house. So I want people to know, and I wanted him to know that I'm out here doing things and I'm I'm open about it, and I am like I'm not hiding. And and I kind of I want him to know that like we can't hide it forever. Like it's kind of like this, I don't know.

Advice For Anyone Still In It

SPEAKER_00 40:07

But so that was empowering to go hang up my having well, my husband did it, but you know, your voice, you're you're empowering yourself, you know, going through that process is empowering. Um so I think my last question I have is if there's a woman listening to this story and she may be in in it and is afraid to leave or thinking there's no way this is my life, because sometimes women think that this is my life, it's just this is how it's gonna be. Yeah, what would you tell that woman?

SPEAKER_01 40:42

Run as fast as you can. Um, but I mean that's easier said than done. I would tell her that just take it slow if you need to, but know that there is someone else out there, like there's someone for you. And it's it's hard, it's definitely hard. But there's so much more to life than surviving. It's hard, it's really hard. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 41:17

There's I mean, just listening to your story is motivating enough and inspiring to see that, you know, there is more to life than staying with someone who is, you know, bringing you down. But you know, the other side of it is you're thriving and you're standing on your your with your voice and you are in a place where you're healing and it's way better than it was when you were in that situation.

SPEAKER_01 41:46

Yeah. And it definitely, I mean, uh my faith throughout the years has really stuck with me, and that's what I kind of leaned on in that time. Um, but even, you know, if if you don't have family around you, like to just find anyone, there's just one person that you can talk to, and then a little bit it'll start to get the ball rolling, and then I think that is what also really helped, is because then you finally get some people's inputs and you're like, wait, this isn't this isn't good.

Where To Find Becca

SPEAKER_00 42:24

Right, right. Yeah, absolutely. Well, I want to thank you so much for sharing this. Um, I think we went from you know, going through some hard times, and now here you are thriving with your business and you're being an entrepreneur and how exciting that is. Um, and you have kids and your mom and you're uh you're also a wife, and now you're speaking your truth. I mean, how amazing is that, right? Yeah. Um, so where can we find you? Where's your location? Tell us all that good stuff.

SPEAKER_01 42:59

So I am at the Sweetson 7 in Latham, uh suite number five, and then my website, blinkbybecca.com, and then um blink by becca on Instagram and TikTok.

SPEAKER_00 43:12

Yeah, and I want people to know that uh these uh dainty tattoos that she does are so beautiful and feminine, but yet empowering. And she doesn't know this yet, but I've been dying to reach out to her because I need one and I haven't I have no tattoos, and I've been dying to have something small. So we'll see when we do that.

SPEAKER_01 43:36

Um absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 43:38

I'll be here for you. Oh, that's awesome. Um, again, Becca, thank you so much for sharing the story.

SPEAKER_01 43:44

Thank you so much for having me.

Hotlines Plus Subscribe And Share

SPEAKER_00 43:46

No, this was a this was great, and I I know there's women listening, and it's very inspiring to hear the other side, right? That you have thrived. So, for everybody else, if you heard today's Story and it resonates with you, or if you see yourself in parts of this story, please know this. You are not crazy, you are not weak, and you are not alone. There is help available. I will be putting in the links the National Domestic Violence Hotline. Um, they offer support 24-7. It's 1-800-799-SAFE. You can also text start S-T-A-R-T to 88788 to chat safely. And if you are in immediate danger, of course, you can call 911. To those who are listening outside of the United States, we encourage you to search for domestic violence hotlines in your country. Many offer confidential and anonymous support. So, again, if this episode moved you, share it with someone who needs it. Um, because this is Mom is My Emergency Contact. This is where we tell the stories of women that whisper and we remind you you are not alone. But before you go, let's make sure you're subscribed to Mom is My Emergency Contact Podcast. Wherever you listen to podcasts on Apple, Spotify, and all major platforms. If you'd rather watch the conversation, head over to our YouTube channel just to search Mom is My Emergency Contact and hit subscribe. And if you want bonus content, because Becca and I are going to talk very briefly a little bit behind the scenes and you want in on it, hang out with us on Substack. It's the Mom is my emergency contact after hours. The link is in the notes for you to subscribe to. And if you have a story that is too crazy to be true, and it's like, oh my God, I can't believe this is my life moment. We want it. Email us at mom is my emergency contact at gmail.com, all one word. Your story might end up on the show. So again, this is Mom Is My Emergency Contact. And we remind you again, you are not alone. And until next time, bye.