Tertiary Sports
Your sports outsider, outsider sports podcast where two clueless comedians who are outsiders to sports serve up side-splitting hilarity while exploring the wildest and most obscure sports ever invented! From cheese rolling to extreme ironing, join us every Tuesday as we stumble through the sporting world like two uncoordinated penguins on ice. Laughter guaranteed!
Tertiary Sports
Tertiary Sports 2.4- head, shoulders, knees & toes (Sepak Tekraw)
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You ever wonder what its like to kick wood but never had the courage to go through with it? Check out Sepak Tekraw, or kick volleyball with us this week! A unique twist on the traditional game that's all the rage in many Malayan schools with badminton/volleyball courts. So tune in, strap in, and let's get weird with Tertiary Sports!
Now with video: https://youtu.be/n_M--MAE_I8
Connect with us:
- Socials: Find us @clambakeincident or @clambakeincidentpodcast on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and TikTok.
- Contact: Email us at tertiarysports@gmail.com or give us a call at 207-200-6051.
Tertiary Sports is:
- Reed Bridge-Koenigsberg & Sam Workman performing for you.
- Art by Hailey Mealey.
- Editing and production by Sam Workman.
- Behind the scenes content by Reed Bridge-Koenigsberg.
Our theme music: "Red City Hero" by Big Man. Outro music: "Big Time" by ikoliks.
Until next week, live well & be kind! Cheers!
Tertiary Sports
Speaker 1I'm creeping up and eating there inside , like my indecision to call you and hear the voice of treason . Are you ready , weird ?
Speaker 2Go Sport oh .
Speaker 3Slam Ball is a full contact sport .
Speaker 2Now we pump things , we find you back in two , or we go in a rotation , we can twist . Hey , you want to talk about ?
Speaker 1sports . I have a special club that meets up at the target every Thursday night . We beat this shit out of them .
Speaker 3We wrestle real hard on those old mattresses . Okay , read Sam Sport Sport , you said the magic word , I'll just have to wither and die . Yeah .
Speaker 1I said it three times . It's like Beetlejuice . The opposite , though . I have a sport . You fucking toes at me . I got it yeah , hey those are extra . Keep those out of frame .
Speaker 2No , no , no you didn't say the magic word you almost got there , sam .
Speaker 1But no , yeah , those are For a reasonable fee . You too can look at Sam's feet . Welcome to tertiary sports folks . My name is Read , my name is Sam , and I'm not really still sure what camera to look at , but I'm going to stare at this one . Just stare at all of them . I'm Read . I'm also Read . Do you see ? We're twins actually , clearly . Yeah , he got the looks . It's true , heard , you got a sport for me . I do . Also . What are we ? What do we do ?
Speaker 3We're tertiary sports .
Speaker 1You're outside our sports podcast . We're sports outsiders . Heard , you got a sport for me . Hahaha , in either parts of the intro we can pepper in before you can explain your sport , like us on Instagram . Hahaha , just weird hard cuts between all of that . So I do have a sport for you and we're going to start talking about the sport in a moment . Okay , I thought you were just telling me what we're doing . We're going to talk about the sport . We're going to talk about the sport On the sports podcast we've been doing .
Speaker 1Here on tertiary sports , we discuss a sport , a sport that's peculiar , some might even say it's potentially maybe Bizarre sports that ESPN Are just not going to Afraid to talk about . They won't touch it with a 10 foot stick . Espn 8 or lower , higher , whatever Higher Actually it's ESPN 4 , because that's when dart starts . That's fair . Not that that's a good . No offense dart players , but little offense dart players .
Speaker 1Little offense , dart players , you played at a bar . It's not a sport . Volleyball was created in 1895 . I know this sport , what's the ball ? Volleyball ? I know , yeah , this is not very tertiary , it's in the Olympics . 1895 , 1895 , really , in Holyoke , massachusetts , massachusetts also gave us basketball . Mmm Springfield , did Massachusetts also give us slam ball ? The dude was from Massachusetts . I thought it started in LA . That tracks , that tracks that a dude from Massachusetts Went to LA and started slam ball . Yeah , coming back . Yeah , actually , by the time this sounds it's back . Yeah , we'll cover , we'll update you guys with some news . I know you're itching for it . Just that slam news , that sluice , splall , splall , slam ball . Some facts about volleyball , volleyball , volleyball .
Speaker 1I believe it's pronounced woleyball in other places . You play with a soft leather or synthetic leather ball . You use your hands and no other parts of you . Okay , it requires 15 points to win . Okay , oh , that was those . I have no jokes . Muay Thai is a combat sport called the Art of Eight Limbs .
Speaker 1Okay , no no , no , no , no , no , no . Can I go on ? What Eight Limbs are talking about ? Yeah , yeah , I guess first off arms legs halfway there , yep , head , shoulders , knees and toes . That'd be good . I think actually it would be elbow . Elbow , which are different than arms , ear , ear , wow , you , hey , are you a Muay Thai instructor ? Cause that was spot on , spot on . You had a dark motherfucker Fucking Muay Toes over there looking at me . Little fucking dogs hanging out , sam Off screen . You may use in Muay Thai . You may use fists , knees , elbows , feet .
Speaker 3Ears .
Speaker 1To strike out . Apparently , its popularity as a sport is predominantly based on the large gambling practice surrounding it . Okay , yeah , I mean it sounds like it's unpadded fight , fighting , and so that feels like a place I could gamble , yeah , gamble and drink . So the sport we're talking about today is not those Just throw that all out , anything to do with those two . Just throw out the window . I'll be real , sam , if you just came to me with two actual sports and then did like .
Kick Volleyball's History and Discussion
Speaker 1And now we're talking about Darts . Darts , I was gonna say dog touching , but that didn't feel good . You could have just let my voice override yours in that one small moment and just never said dog touching . But here we are Sam's a dog touching professional . Do not let him touch your dog . Let me touch your dog . I love dogs . Let me pet your dog . Yeah , its pet is the verb we're looking for . Fuck off read Anyway , this is what we're talking about today . You're in a dog park .
Speaker 2You walk over and you're like You're not just a dog .
Speaker 1Sam's in a trench coat and flip flops , or just a poncho and flip flops . He's like Can I touch your dog ? Oh , okay , I don't know , touch your dog , man , please . I need to touch your dog . Your dog is beautiful . Oh god , off the rails already . Hey , it's a little spice alive . This is what we're talking about today . Read it's fucking old .
Speaker 1Yeah , it's not as fucking old as some of the other ones we're talking about , cause one of them started in like fucking 395 AD . Some bullshit . Oh , what A Turkish oil wrestler BC , bc , not AD , that would be 600 years difference . Over 2000, . Dropping the bucket . The modern version of the sport Uh huh , after surviving colonialism , of course , began taking shape around 1935 in Ceremban , okay , and I obviously know where that country is . But for those of us who don't know where , that is Sam , where I'm vamping , because Sam clearly also does not know Malaysia it's a city of Malaysia .
Speaker 2Okay .
Speaker 1Yeah , which obviously we knew . Yeah , I had it written down right there .
Speaker 3Yeah .
Speaker 1Yeah , I definitely knew it would be important . Yes , and it's definitely a question I would ask . 1935 in Ceremban , a city in Malaysia ? Yes , obviously , it's almost embarrassing for people who didn't know that . Yeah , fucking weirdos . Yet , with the times , no countries Sorry , I get nervous Did Stormy fart . Yeah , okay , this game is now played in the United States the US of A Screeee , but it's an eagle Mm-hmm . Uh , united States , philippines , japan , canada , thailand , myanmar and several others . The Wikipedia didn't include .
Speaker 1Also donate to Wikipedia . The most properly organized competition of this sport was held at a swim club in Penang . Penang , yeah , okay , in Vietnam . Yep I think Um , on May 16th 1945 . And that's just a pool , right ? That's just what a swim club is , just a pool . I mean , I imagine they . Well , I guess depends on how rich a swim club is , Because if it's like a swim club , then it's got like a fucking racquetball court somewhere .
Speaker 3Okay .
Speaker 1I mean , right , yeah , that sounds right . I mean , hey , sam , yeah , I don't fucking know , but yeah , that sounds right . You're the authority on country clubs . You're supposed to know this stuff . Is that my ? It's in your job description Shit , I have to read that better . Three teams from Malay populated localities in Penang .
Speaker 3Okay .
Speaker 1We're among those that competed for the Nyak Din , Nyak Cham Trophy by 1960 , the variation was well known in many Malayan schools that had admin cores . Okay , I actually might know what this one is . Is it still not good ? No , you're good , I'm just oh well don't do the same symbol that's very raised by hat for just being weird .
Speaker 1Okay , so it . Okay , so it needs a volley . I guess maybe there's a volleyball court at the swim club Maybe , which is something they have . Admin court Is there is . This is a genuine quick Is there a difference .
Speaker 1I feel like the net smaller , less sturdy Maybe , because I mean they only use the shuttle . Cocks , yeah , and badminton , yeah , but also Stormy where on Mike she's just sleepy . She's just a sleepy little potato . By 1960 , I already said that badminton courts several Sapaq Raga associations formed in various Malayan states . Can I guess the name of the sport ?
Speaker 1Yeah you should park Raga . No , oh , got you . I was fucking bamboozled just then Got him . Oh , sam , okay . About the same time , similar developments occurred in Thailand . The sport Got to guess Violent ball . It's like volleyball , but you fight . No , I can I get . Can I just give one more guess ? Yeah , I don't know the name of the sport , but is it volleyball ? Just feet Close ? Is that the name of the sport ? Is what I'm asking .
Speaker 3That yeah actually .
Speaker 2Okay , yeah .
Speaker 1It's actually very close . It's also known colloquially as kick volleyball . Shit , is it really ? Yeah , yeah , it's just feet , though it's funnier to me . We just had the volleyball , just feet . Association . Oops , the volleyball , oops , all feet . Yeah , no , the sport Sapaq Tachra , also known as kick volleyball , was first played in badminton courts over the net , with players on two opposing sides composing of two to four players on a court , and this is the thing that humans can play . Yeah , I've seen the videos . It's literally just like football players , like the rest of the world football , not American football just kicking it over the net .
Speaker 2That sounds really fucking hard .
Speaker 1Yeah , dude , especially the people that like do flips and like kick upside down Same . We've played volleyball together and it didn't go well .
Speaker 2And that was with our hand when sunglasses against two fighter pilots .
Speaker 1Exactly , we all smooched at the end , yeah , in slow motion . I'm Ben . Unfortunately , sam tragically died in a training exercise and now I'm on a secret base training fighter pilot . Yeah , anyway , so you remember the volleyball ball , the soft leather or synthetic leather ball ? Yeah , it'll still fucking hurt when it slaps your arm . This ball is made of rat-tan , which , in case you didn't know , wait , hold on . Can I guess ?
Speaker 2Yeah , you nailed it .
Speaker 1Yeah , it's wood . It's what it's wood , and you kick it with my soft human flesh . Yeah , it's basically like bamboo , like pressed bamboo . It was rat-tan , not made out of bamboo , it was made out of rat-tan . Yeah , like , is it wait , hold on . I have some follow-up questions . Is it a solid ball of wood ? No , oh , okay . It's like a woven wood ball .
Speaker 2Kind of like a wicker ball .
Speaker 1That is better . For me , it's still worse than a volleyball . Oh yeah , a thousand times worse , but better than I always think there's kicking a log over the thing and what that would feel like on my shin . That would be pretty bad , I mean . Hence the shin guards .
Speaker 1And that's what I'd like to do to kick volleyball to . It's just oops , all wood . It's just oops , all feet , but the feet is crossed out . It's when you kick feet across . That would actually be kind of fun . One big rubber foot that you kick back and forth . I wasn't picturing a rubber foot , I was figuring us having to get a human foot . Oh no , thank you , are you sure ? I'm pretty good , you too . Sam told me that he is a foot guy . I don't know what else that means . Speedy , you gotta stop snoring right into the mic . She's just eepy . Okay .
Speaker 1So instead of your , you know , kick volleyball . Instead of your volleyball hands , you can only use your football body parts . And whereas we call them legs , yeah , well , I mean chest and shoulders and head , I guess , as we call them , not arms , not arms , yeah , what do you think ? So far ? It sounds fucking hard . It sounds like I would be saying . It sounds like if we had both brought this , we would have been fucked . You want to see the ball ? Yeah , it's one of the older balls . I don't know if you can see that . No , that . That looks like it would hurt . It also looks like I would really enjoy biting into .
Speaker 2I know right .
Speaker 1Yeah , it looks , we're cool , we have cool brain chemistry . Positively munchable , yeah , absolutely Look . And crunchable I want a munch . We have our own munch squad , but it's just inanimate objects we think would taste great or feel great to bite into . We actually done that a lot now that I think about it . Yeah , the tracks Okay , so the net should be made out of it's just a regular ass net mesh six centimeters to eight centimeter mesh , similar to a volleyball net .
Speaker 1Just a bunch of net specifications . The ball we've already talked about should be spherical , made of ratan . Lovely blocks of 20 intersections .
Speaker 3Okay .
Speaker 1And it's slightly different specifications for women because of , I guess , gender based weak feet . That's right . Sam says first , women's feet are not big enough for him . No , men would have weaker feet . Oh , because women have genetically or at least to my understanding , this could be totally wrong in modern science but stronger lower bodies , whereas men have stronger upper bodies .
Speaker 1Oh interesting that is . And if that's wrong , I'm going to give you Sam's mailing address . You could also just send me the article and I'm always happy to learn . The match was played by two teams called Regu . It's pronounced Regu , it's just several sauces set up to play volleyball . Oh , it sounds fun . But with the , what do you call them ? What is foosball ? That's right , folks . If anyone is wondering if we've been friends for a while , I got foosball out of this motion . Thank God we're on camera . Imagine how hard that would be for people just listening . Just a couple seconds of silence and Sam breathing heavy . Oh shit , all right , faults in the game , touching it with your hands . Probably the inside player who is throwing to the server plays with the ball throwing up the ball , bumping , passing to another inside player , etc . After the call of score by referee . So you can't play with the ball after the ref says point or whatever .
Speaker 1Or you can't just play with the ball . Yeah , that fucking sucks , right Okay .
Speaker 3Well , I'm already .
Speaker 1hey , I'm already bad at this game .
Speaker 3I guess I was bad before .
Speaker 1There's a bunch of other specific rules to like serving , like the serving and the playing with the ball , and like specifics to If the ref says this , you can't do this . Well , you haven't started a new play . It's whatever . Any player who touches the ball on the opponent's side , that's a fault or a penalty , any part of the players but you can't cross the whoop Playing the ball more than three times in succession .
Speaker 3Okay , so that's volleyball yeah .
Speaker 2Okay .
Speaker 1I say that confidently . That feels like a volleyball rule . No , that's volleyball . Okay , volleyball also has gotten more stringent over the years , surprisingly , and not like in a fun , cool way , in like a oh , they made more rules so that you couldn't pass it a couple of times on your side . That's weird . Yeah , you also have to do 15 points now instead of 21 points . Anyway , moving on to the sport we're doing , which isn't volleyball , which isn't volleyball .
Speaker 1Volleyball loops all feet Scoring system . An official doubles or regu is won by the best of three sets , with each set being played up to 21 points . So OG volleyball , gotcha , old school WOS , that's good audio . People love a long tent silence . Anyway , team event or group match is effectively three regu matches played back to back using different players for each regu . Okay , thank God , yeah , the winner is determined by the best of three regus , where a winner of each individual regu is determined by the best of three sets Played up to 21 points .
Discussion on Kick Volleyball
Speaker 1In the last or third set a change of sides takes place when one team reaches 11 points .
Speaker 1That makes sense yeah , that might be volleyball too .
Speaker 3No bad , they have to change sides yeah .
Speaker 1Probably yeah , sports .
Speaker 3Sports yes , sports Sports sports , word sports sports , sports , sports , sports sports , sports , sports , sports , sports , sports , sports , sports sport sports sports , sports , sports , sports sports sports s sports sports , sports , sports sports sports .
Speaker 1Um , serving teams alternate serving every three points , regardless of who wins the points . If a tie takes place at 21-21 , each team alternates one serve until a winner is determined . Okay , mm-hmm , that makes sense to me . Yeah , set each set is won by the side which scores 21 points , with a minimum lead of two points to a ceiling of 25 points . In the event of a tie , the set shall be won by the side which gets a lead of two points or when a side reaches . This is just reiterating . That is , and I think maybe volleyball .
Speaker 1Yeah , probably but again just hard , or an orio hard sport . Yeah , no , when I was still playing soccer . Like when you're playing soccer football , it's like you have to train you train your feet to be just as good with a ball . Like it wouldn't be that hard if you play football . Let's go right now . I mean , not for me , we find a badminton court , not for you . For me , we get two of the best soccer players we can find and we challenge them for money , as in if we lose , we get money .
Speaker 1Obviously , we're like drinking . We're drinking thick stouts right before we go on here . Drink this gallon of milk before we go on the court yeah , that'd be great . We died out there . He's dead , which means we lose , right ? Give us money , well , give me money . Donate to the Reed Foundation , anyway , yeah , that's . That's . That sounds really hard Zipok . Tekra , the cool fucking name .
Speaker 1Or kick volleyball or Sam volleyball . Oops , I'll feed . Yeah , it's a picture of you , like on the box of the cereal we've made just like , surrounded by different feet in your natural habitat . I didn't include the history to this one because it is convoluted . Essentially , it may have been introduced to Southeast Asia by the Chinese , who are inspired by the traditional game Kujoo , which is an ancient military exercise where soldiers play to keep a leather ball filled with feathers airborne by kicking it back and forth between two or more people no net . As the game evolved , the feather stuff ball was replaced by an airfield ball with two-layered hull . Quick question yeah , so you're saying that kick volleyball came out of a sport that was ancient Chinese military hacky sack . Yeah , pretty much .
Speaker 3That's awesome , excellent , no further questions .
Speaker 1This would be fucking excellent training if you were , if you'd played like , if you were like I want to be a professional football player . Yeah , we say that all the time .
Speaker 3Yeah all the time .
Speaker 1We're like I'm going to get out there and I'm going to do it . I mean the prime of my youth , you know 28 . Prime of the youth . I'm hungry , I'm ready . Bones never been more solid , Joints crackling Poppin' . So in Mayanmar , Sipak Takara is known as Shilone , which has been played for about 1500 years .
Speaker 1That's roughly 1500 to 2000 years ago is when the sport kind of Okay , so it seems like maybe volleyball . We reinvented the wheel . What You're telling me that White colonials lists , colonial Colonisms , colonists , colonists . Thank you . The word you're looking for is colonists . You're telling me that white colonists took something and made it theirs . You sound crazy , sam . Read , sam . You clearly haven't read your history book . You sound crazy . Right now you got an F on your paper . Thank you , white teacher . Thank you , welcome . Hey , look , it's white . Save your Barbie . It's pretty good . Watch the Barbie movie .
Speaker 3It's fucking good .
Speaker 1I might rewatch it later . Yeah , there's just a shit ton of history . That's actually really cool . I think one of the things I want to dive into at some point is like ancient sports , because I think there's a lot of cool ones that we don't do anymore because they were either popular or very dangerous , yeah , or just incredibly dangerous , yeah , yeah . I mean , I think the one that we touched on was like horse ball , yeah . Yeah , pato had to get changed because there were just too many knife fights and the Pope , or like one of the Cardinals , was like you won't go to heaven if you play this . Pato is an excellent . Did you see the new intro video that we have at the beginning of this episode ? Oh , yeah .
Speaker 3Yeah .
Speaker 1That horse ball , you fucking watch your show .
Speaker 1I think I did . I listened to it certainly . No , I definitely watched it . Yeah , no , we got that cool Pato footage , nice . Hey , sam , thank you for the little introductory into the world of foot . The feet Same is . As I've always said my guy Don't do this , don't do it . Just because I walk around barefoot doesn't mean you get to put me on wiki feet . What do you mean ? I get to ? I had to . I was on her bound . I fulfilled my fucking duty as a night of the round foot table . That around is the table around foot , or one or a table made of feet in around . I actually like that better . It's a circle of feet , Okay , like a , like a mandala . Awful , yeah right .
Speaker 1You like that . The worst , sam . That was great . That was like one of those . I think that might be the hardest sport , not the sport that we're least equipped for . I would say Pato's on that list . Yeah , because I don't have a horse . Yeah , we should play with cars or like mopeds . Mopeds would actually be kind of fun .
Speaker 1I think that'd be , fun , but like the low speed ones , yeah , 15 miles an hour , 30 CCs or below , yeah , it's basically a weedwacker on wheels . Lawn mower Pato would also be kind of fun . I'm into it . I'm also into this game . This feels like so is this popular America at all ? Like it's probably not organized . So there was .
Speaker 1So it was created in America , in Inglewood , california , and there was like one dude who kind of kept it going . There was like some people that were playing there and then they were eventually invited to like some of the international games . Not good for them , yeah , and so there's a small presence in America and but in California , well , no , I mean , this can be played anywhere . There's a fucking volleyball court and feet when Sam knows where all feet are at all times . We did establish on a trip to a convention yeah , to a PAX East that I know where . I'm not into feet , but I know where all feet are at all times . Yeah , that was a fun trip . It's a fun trip , weird trip , fun trip , yeah , anyway , that was SIPOC TechRaw .
Speaker 3SIPOC TechRaw . Sipoc TechRaw .
Speaker 1Yeah .
Speaker 3Okay .
Speaker 1T-A-K-R-A-W . Close enough , I got it close enough . Anyway , I'm Reed . Is it T-E-K ? That's Sam . I'm Sam . He spells and smells .
Speaker 3Yeah , no , I got it right , and we are your .
Speaker 1I don't smell , fuck you . We are your sports journalists for outsider sports . We hope you enjoyed this show and we hope you enjoy next one .
Speaker 3As we .
Speaker 1Reed and Sam , come back for put sport here . It's going to be good and until next week or next time we see you , I'll see you in the showers . It's going to put a slow zoom on your face right there . I can only zoom so far . I know you can do it slow . Thanks for listening to our Shierie Sports . If you had a good time with us , share us with a friend . Give us a five star review on one of your favorite podcasting platforms . You can also find our socials at clan bake incident at whatever platform Instagram , tiktok , twitter
Co-Creators Bid Farewell and Express Remorse
Speaker 1, et cetera . This show was co-created by Reed Bridge Konigsberg and myself , sam Workman . We'll see you next Tuesday and be well and stay kind .
Speaker 2Say it ain't , so I will not go Turn the lights off . Carry me .
Speaker 1Sorry , Stormy .
Speaker 2I miss you . I'm so sorry . I cannot sleep , I cannot eat tonight and in the darkness I wonder something about spiders comes creeping up and festing there inside , like my indecision to call you .
