What Luke Skywalker’s "Day Off" Says About Midlife | EP154

After a big chapter ends, the hardest part isn’t knowing what’s next. It’s giving yourself permission to pause.

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After a big chapter ends, there’s often a quiet moment no one prepares you for.

The kids are grown.
A career chapter closes.
A long season of responsibility winds down.

And instead of relief or clarity, a different question shows up:

What now?

In this episode of Encore Living, I explore that in-between space through an unexpected lens — imagining what Luke Skywalker might have done the day after saving the galaxy in Star Wars.

Not the next movie.
Not the next mission.
Just the day after the big win.

Because chances are, he didn’t immediately try to figure out the rest of his life.

And maybe… you don’t have to either.

In this episode, I talk about three simple, very human things Luke might have done on his day off — and what they can teach us about navigating midlife transitions without rushing ourselves:

• Why rest often shows up after a chapter ends, not during it
• Why celebration isn’t indulgent — it’s acknowledgment
• And why putting the world in “airplane mode” can create space for something new to emerge

If you’re a parent or empty nester who’s feeling unsettled, reflective, or quietly wondering what comes next, this episode is for you.

As I share in the episode, the pause between stories isn’t a problem to solve — it’s a space to inhabit.

Here’s a simple question to sit with after listening:

Which part of Luke’s day off do you need most right now?

Not what would impress anyone.
Not what would make sense on paper.

Just what would help you honor what you’ve already lived.

P.S. If someone came to mind while you were listening to this episode, feel free to share it with them. Sometimes the most reassuring thing we can offer is the reminder: You don’t have to decide everything yet.

You can find me here:

Dr. Thor on Instagram @drthor.tv
Dr. Thor on TikTok @drthor.tv

Website: https://drthor.tv/

Transcript

Setting Up The Luke Metaphor

Dr. Thor Challgren 0:00

Have you ever wondered what Luke Skywalker did right after Star Wars ended? You know, Luke Skywalker, the hero of the original Star Wars movies. What do you think he did right after the first movie ended? I mean, right after, not years later, not in the next movie, but the day after he blew up the Death Star. Because I'm pretty sure he didn't sit down somewhere, stare off into space, because you know he was in space, and say to himself, okay, what am I supposed to do now with the rest of my life? And yet, that's the question so many of us ask at midlife. We raise a family, we finish a career, we pour ourselves into something amazing for years, sometimes decades. And then almost immediately we feel this kind of pressure to know what comes next, to define it, to make it impressive, to make it make sense. In this episode, I want to talk about what happens in between stories. Because I think that you and I, we have another big adventure in our lives. At least one, maybe more. Adventures yet to come. But what about the space before that adventure happens? What about the chapter that doesn't have a title yet? That's where I want to spend our time today. So roll the titles, it's Encore Living, episode 154, A New Hope. You spent years being an awesome parent. You were so good you could have won an Academy Award for Best Supporting Parent. Cut to present day. The kids are grown, the script is gone, and you're thinking, what's this part I'm playing now? Yeah, I get that. I had a 20-year career as a writer in Hollywood. All the while, I was the stay-at-home dad who did it all. Carpool, homework, soccer coach, girl scout leader. Then one day, my daughter left for college, and for me, it felt like the screen went dark. Like my life got canceled mid-season. That's when it hit me. Life wasn't over. I was just in between seasons. Now I'm a published author, TEDx speaker, and a new thought minister. I'm an OG fan of the original Superman movie, can't pass up a good Mox Ellen. Yeah, I'm the dad who ran a Girl Scout troop for 13 years, so I'm kind of an easy mark at cookie season. Every week I'll share fun, inspiring, and practical strategies to help you start over. Straight from someone who's been there. Welcome to Encore Living. Welcome to the show. I'm Dr. Thor, and I'm really glad you're here. So if this idea of being between stories already resonates with you, you're not alone. You know, we don't talk much about this part of our life. I mean, yes, we celebrate beginnings, we sing the anthems, we do the hoopla, we certainly celebrate big wins where crowds rush the field audiences cheer. We even talk about the endings. But that middle space, the pause after something big ends and before the next thing reveals itself, that tends to get skipped. And that's why I want to talk about that today. So let's go back to good old Luke Skywalker for a minute. It's been almost what 50 years since the first Star Wars came out. So I'm gonna spoil some things here. Spoil alert. In case you didn't know, at the end of Star Wars, Luke Skywalker blows up the Death Star. There, I said it. Which, by the way, I'm pretty sure blowing up the Death Star is probably the biggest thing Luke has ever done in his entire life. I mean, how do you top that? At least for another movie or two. He's probably thinking life doesn't get much bigger or better than this. Oh, Luke, just you wait. You'll see. But think about it. You save the galaxy, you torch the Empire's secret planet-sized weapon, you become a hero overnight. Princess Leia hands out the shiny medals, the music swells, everyone cheers. It doesn't get much better, right? But you ever wonder what exactly does Luke Skywalker do the very next day? I mean, I guess we assume what? He just immediately pivots to the next mission, I guess? But if you stop and think about it, that expectation doesn't make a lot of sense. Because after something that big, the first thing that happens is not someone saying, Luke Skywalker, you just destroyed the Death Star. Where are you going now? I'm going to Dagobah Disneyland. No, that's not what happens. More likely, it's exhaustion, shock, a nap, a beer, some food, anything to relax. I would wager that in reality, Luke would be in one of those unsettled moments where your nervous system hasn't yet caught up to what you just did. And that's where this metaphor really clicked for me. Because that's what I think this season can feel like for so many parents at midlife. You just did something enormous. You raised a human being, or maybe even several. You showed up every day, day after day, year after year. You worried, you you sacrificed. And now, where does your story go now? Because I'm bet that your house, it feels kind of different. There's less things on your calendar. And that structure that you used to have, the places to go, the things to do, it's way more relaxed now. And instead of being allowed to settle into that, many of us immediately turn inward and ask, okay, now what? Now what? Now what? Like the pause itself is a problem. I don't think that it is. I think what many of us are experiencing, it's not confusion over what's next, it's transition. There's a book I really like. It's called Life is in the Transitions by Bruce Feiler. In the book, he talks about something he calls a lifequake. A lifequake is when something big happens, an ending, a disruption, a change. And the old story no longer fits, but the new one hasn't arrived yet. What I like about that framing is that it doesn't treat these moments as failures, it treats them as natural pauses, as part of how real lives actually unfold. Without that framing, we tend to judge ourselves. We tell ourselves we should be more motivated, more grateful, more decisive. But what if this moment is not asking you to decide anything yet? So here's a thought experiment I've been playing with. Because I'm a huge Star Wars fan, I actually saw the original movie in a theater in 1977. So yes, I'm an OG Star Wars fan. So here's what I'm thinking. Instead of wondering what Luke Skywalker did with the rest of his life, which we kind of know some of that, I like to imagine what did he do the day after blowing up the Death Star? Let's say he blew up the Death Star on a Monday, because that kind of feels like a Monday thing, right? Also, then it would be a perfect three-day holiday going forward. So, yes, Monday. So, my question then is what did Luke do on Tuesday? Just that one day. And here's what I imagine. I think the first thing Luke did was sleep in. Not a little. I mean really sleep in. No alarm clock, no droids hovering over him with updates. R2D2 and C3PO are just parked in the living room of whatever super bougie rebel suite he was staying in on Yavin for. He didn't have to be anywhere. He didn't have to do anything. He didn't check the galactic news feed to see what people were saying about him. He just let his body catch up. Because the day before, his nervous system had been through everything fear, adrenaline, loss, relief, victory. You don't metabolize that overnight, right? Neither should we. For a lot of parents, exhaustion doesn't fully show up until after the long chapter ends. When the pressure lifts, the body finally says, Oh, now we can feel this. Rest isn't something that you earn after you figure out what's next. Sometimes it's the thing that makes the next chapter possible. So that's the first thing I think Luke did on that first Tuesday. He slept in. The second thing I imagine Luke did that day, I think he went to brunch. And yes, brunch is kind of ridiculous. It's a little frivolous, kind of bougie, which is exactly why it's perfect. Brunch says, you know, we did the thing. We survived. We're allowed to enjoy this for a minute. So I picture Luke sitting there with Han and Leia eating avocado toast, endless mimosas, drinking coffee that didn't come out of a metal tube, not talking about the fate of the galaxy, just being people, people who destroyed the Empire, on Monday. And this is the part a lot of us skip. We skip the endless mimosas and avocado toast. We finish something huge, like raising kids, closing a career chapter, maybe, and we minimize it. We normalize it. We tell ourselves, well, that's just what you're supposed to do. But celebration isn't indulging yourself, it's acknowledging yourself. It's letting yourself feel the weight of what you actually accomplished. So I think that's the second thing Luke did. He went to brunch and had endless mimosas. Also, of course, Chewbacco is probably there. He probably had endless bloody merries. And before I tell you the third thing I imagine Luke did that day, let me pause for just a moment to tell you something I'm really proud of. I write a free weekly newsletter called Encore Living Insider. It's where this conversation continues during the week. A growing group of readers who are also in this in-between season of life thinking about what comes next without rushing themselves. I share reflections there that don't always make it into the podcast, things I'm noticing, ideas I'm still working through, and observations that feel more personal and still kind of unfinished. If this episode resonates with you, you'd probably enjoy being part of that weekly conversation. It's free, as I said, and you'll find the link in the show notes. Okay, back to Luke. So the third thing I imagine Luke did that day, Tuesday, the day after he blew up the Death Star on Monday, is this. I think he put the rest of the afternoon in airplane mode. Because by that afternoon, you just know everyone wanted a piece of him, right? Commanders probably wanted debriefs, strategists, talking plans. Someone's probably already talking about what the Empire might do next. Probably something even bigger and even worse, even death starrier. And if Luke had let them, the rest of the day would have been jam-packed with what other people wanted. So I imagine him doing something simple. He just turns on airplane mode. He wasn't available. No notifications, no responding. Everything could just wait. Because how else would he have time to process what just happened? Losing his aunt and uncle, watching his mentor, Obi-Wan Kenobi, die, the shock of becoming someone new overnight. Reflection doesn't happen in five-minute gaps between blowing up Death Stars. It needs maybe a little quiet. This is where I keep thinking about something from the book The Artist's Way by Joe Cameron. She talks about this idea of an artist's date, time you take for yourself alone, with no productive goal attached to it. What I love about that idea is that it's not about figuring anything out, it's about putting the rest of the world on hold for a bit. It's airplane mode. Not because you're avoiding life, but because you're giving yourself space to actually hear yourself think again. And this part feels really relevant right now. With everything going on in the world and the constant pull to stay informed, stay responsive, engaged. It's easy to forget that you're allowed to step back for a minute. So that's the third thing I think Luke did. He put the rest of the afternoon in airplane mode. When I put all of that together, the sleeping in, the brunch, the airplane mode, it changes how I think about this season of life. Because none of those things are about deciding the future, they're about honoring what just happened. So instead of asking yourself some massive question about the rest of your life, I want to leave you with something much simpler. As you listen to this, just notice which part of Luke's day resonates with you. For some, it might be the sleeping in part. Not literally necessarily, although maybe, but more the idea of letting your body slow down without feeling guilty about it. For others, it might be the brunch part, the mimosas, the celebration, the moment where you actually pause long enough to acknowledge what you just finished mattered. And then there's the airplane mode part. That one for me feels especially important right now. What would it look like to give yourself a day, or even just an afternoon, where nothing needs to be solved? Where you don't have to process everything at once. Because if Luke Skywalker didn't have to decide the rest of his life the day after blowing up the Death Star, you probably don't either. If your life feels quieter now, that doesn't mean the story is over. It just means you're in between stories. And that space, as uncomfortable as it can feel, might actually be doing important work for you. And that's Encore Living. If you liked this episode, please consider subscribing to the show. That way you'll always have these conversations waiting for you when a new episode drops on Mondays. And if you haven't already, sign up for the Encore Living newsletter. That's where I share reflections like this one, along with what I'm working on next. The link is in the show notes below. Thanks for spending this time with me today. Until next time, take care of yourself.