The Review Review
Hosts Ben and Paul welcome special guests from all walks of life to watch, rate, discuss, and RERATE the films close to their hearts. You'll laugh (hopefully), you'll cry (maybe), you'll reconsider everything you have ever known! Welcome, to "The Review Review"
The Review Review
Twins / It's Barnstang Now (Guest Cohost: Ben Burris)
Guest co-host Ben "Burrito" Burris joins his bro (not-identical) "regular” co-host Paul for a thorough examination of "Twins” (d. Reitman 1988). Starring: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Danny DeVito, and Kelly Preston. Is it possible for a PG rated comedy to be one of the horniest, busiest, raunchiest, rootenest, tootenest, and glutenest movies in the history of The Review Review?! That stuff, and all you need to know about repetitive jokes, and "twinsense," 11/11!
****A member of the “Review Review,” family is in the fight of her life, you can help! - TAP/CLICK HERE
More with Burris:
Season 1 - Somewhere In Time
Season 2 - Tim Burton's The Nightmare Before Christmas
**All episodes contain explicit language**
Artwork - Ben McFadden
Review Review Intro/Outro Theme - Jamie Henwood
"What Are We Watching" & "Whatcha been up to?" Themes - Matthew Fosket
"Fun Facts" Theme - Chris Olds/Paul Root
Lead-Ins Edited/Conceptualized by - Ben McFadden
Produced by - Ben McFadden & Paul Root
Concept - Paul Root
Uh I can't trust you. It's true. So I'm monitoring you for your deviance. I think that's fair considering the conversation we just had. Hi, everybody. But it's a fun idea. It is a fun idea. Welcome. It's a little teaser for you, and a teaser on a teaser there, and a hat on a hat on a hat. My name is Paul.
SPEAKER_08:And my name is Ben Burris. Whoa.
SPEAKER_03:I know. That's kind of a curveball. Right? That's fun. Ben McFadden, your more regular, not that you're irregular, Burris. Not strange. You can call me what you want. The rhythm is what I'm really referring to. The rhythm's what's gonna get you. It's about to get me. Ben McFadden would normally be your co-host, but today I have the Schwarzenegger to my DeVito.
SPEAKER_08:I'll take it.
SPEAKER_03:The I can't remember her. The Preston to my I can't what is her name? I have the fact sheet here. Uh Webb. Yeah? Okay. Sure. Why not? If you're not caught up, Ben Burris is here co-hosting with me, and we are going to talk about the movie Twins. This was Burris's quasi-selection. Will you tell will you tell the people about how you feel about how this went?
SPEAKER_08:Twins was brought up as a possibility. And then I had a couple ideas. So then I picked twins with the caveat that, you know, when it's the three of us, we'll return to one of those other films.
SPEAKER_03:Up your sleeve, you have the perfect weapon. Just waiting, like an ace up your sleeve, which is pretty cool. I don't even know exactly what that is. You also brought up a knight in the streets and kind of an expert. Uh-huh. Wow, cool. You had also mentioned a movie that like I'm super interested in watching, and I just want you to tell the people about Dracula's Dog.
SPEAKER_08:Oh, yeah, uh Dracula's Dog or uh or Zoltan. Okay. Uh Dracula's Dog. I think it's there's there's like three names for that movie. Special Effects was uh uh Stan Winston. And uh my dad worked on that movie, and uh as I don't know what he did. He was usually a UPN, uh UP production manager, but USP produced in but um he uh the dog's eyes glow in the movie, and my dad figured out how to make the uh the eyes glow. That's so cool. But like Stan Winston made like vampire teeth for all these dogs to wear because there's a bunch of them stuff. Yeah. What what was the premise of the movie? Oh god, I saw it when I was like 12. So um I don't know, Dracula's dog is out there and about and wreaking havoc, and I think eventually Dracula comes. But there's this movie was made in the 70s.
SPEAKER_03:I want to say the actual plot to this movie. Communist soldiers accidentally unleash Dracula's servant and dog, Zoltan, during Romanian excavations. They set out to find the last living descendant unaware of the dangers. But there's also a vampire hunter involved and other descendants and caves and all sorts of stuff. Yeah, so that was close. So we had talked about doing that movie and thought maybe do something a little more mainstream. And so we went to actually the complete opposite end of the spectrum and picked maybe the most mainstream movie that's ever been made.
SPEAKER_10:Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:From Dracula's dog, and they're like, you know what? Flip the coin 180 fucking degrees. A movie that I can't wait to talk about some of the fun facts for. Just some people know how to make magic happen, I guess.
SPEAKER_08:It's just the right combination of ingredients at the right time, right place.
SPEAKER_03:Throw enough spaghetti at a wall, some of it's gonna stick. Ben. What have you been doing?
unknown:What have I been doing?
SPEAKER_08:I I don't know. Um, I've been uh I have a new house because I inherited a house. My dad passed away in the summertime. It's been uh it's been a whole thing. I'm doing all right, you know, and now I'm living in my childhood home, which is interesting. Yeah. I've definitely put my own started to put my own spin on it and redid the living room. But now there's just there's just still a lot of stuff I have to go through. It's it's a packed house, you know, one day at a time.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, well, and just in terms of like the process of all these things. Like you were talking where it's like, I've already done two dumpsters, yeah.
SPEAKER_08:Two, you know, trying to figure out what to throw away, what to hold on to. What paperwork do I do? What taxes do I yeah, the estate side of it is just uh is awful. Yeah. And the fact that everyone at some point has like to go through this.
SPEAKER_03:But you heard it here last, as per usual on the review review. Yeah, shit's tough.
SPEAKER_08:Um but um um I'm doing a uh one night stage reading of um Macers. Oh.
SPEAKER_03:This is nor not a church nor a theater. Well, I know I just like okay. Macbeth and we can fight here for the one prize. Oh, great. It's not against the rules. Okay, yeah. Also, when is the next 1448 thing? What's going on?
SPEAKER_08:So we have a fundraiser coming up on November 15th at the Roguelike Taver uh Roguelike Tavern. There's gonna be a silent auction and a raffle, and we're uh doing readings of three different 10-minute plays, one from each year of the festival so far. And we're all just we're trying to raise money for our next festival that goes up on February 6th and February 7th.
SPEAKER_03:Okay.
SPEAKER_08:Mm-hmm. That'll be festival number four.
SPEAKER_03:You want to hear something cool?
SPEAKER_08:Uh yeah.
SPEAKER_03:You heard it here first.
SPEAKER_08:Okay. Oh.
SPEAKER_03:Breaking news. Is it? Which again, like normally we said, you know, you heard it here last.
SPEAKER_08:Mm-hmm. So we did we did one we booked it. 180. Yeah, we did that.
SPEAKER_03:It was a first. It's like a big tall bodybuilder and what is it, all the crap that was left over. You know, two totally different people that scratch their tonight simultaneously.
SPEAKER_08:Yes, you're a night bro.
SPEAKER_03:You promise? What do I do? I don't know what to do. Wouldn't there have been a manual where he was your twin brother?
SPEAKER_08:You'd think the education manual. That's to say, like, he's he knows what he he speaks seven or eight languages. Right. And is is working along scientists and is and is read, he's just he's book learned, is what he says. So why why hasn't he like there's there's tons of books about sex and the human body and and procreation, and but he's absolutely clueless.
SPEAKER_03:Interesting. Interesting. Think about that. Just think about that, everyone. Think about that real good. I also find it interesting that he needs to read a manual to drive a car, but knows exactly how the alarm works. Yes. Yes. Was that in that manual? It might have been. I get maybe.
SPEAKER_08:It might have been, but I mean It might have been. Let's nitpick it fucking. Oh, it's great. What are you doing? I love it. I'm learning the drive.
SPEAKER_03:I got to that point almost with uh goosebumps. I got very fast at reading goosebumps. Oh, because I had the first like hundred and something and got very proficient at reading the goosebumps. I I couldn't go Arnold Schwarzenegger reading a car manual fast. Okay, but pretty quick. Nice impressed.
SPEAKER_07:Very good. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:You know what else will impress you? I'm gonna tell you what I've been doing.
SPEAKER_07:Okay.
SPEAKER_03:I make a lot of breakfasts, and I don't think I've ever shared this specific piece of my breakfast on what we call uh Paul's Recipe Corner PRC. It that's all it stands for. Paul's recipe corner. Great. I like to make scrambled eggs and bacon in the morning. You know, that's uh special case, a big fan. And uh I do the bacon in the air fryer.
SPEAKER_08:Yes.
SPEAKER_03:That's the the only way to fly. And the only way to fly the eggs. Thank you. Yeah. The eggs, I put a little butter in a saucepan. And apparently it's the Gordon Ramsay method. Oh and I I'm sorry if you talk to I did. Okay. He took it and he put his name on it after I taught it to him. Fucking Gordon Ramsay. Well, I was back in my 50s then. In a little more vain now that I'm my teens, 1985.
SPEAKER_08:And you're trying to bring up the next generation of chefs.
SPEAKER_03:So I mean you just gotta soft scrambies. There you go. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You whip it around with the the nonstick thingy in the saucepan with the butter. Sour cream. Just a good, you know, it's a smaller spoon in there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Pepper, salt. The sour cream has like no flavor that transfers over. It's chocolate on there. The other secret you have it on the heat for 30 seconds and you keep scraping the saucepan. You take it off for 30 seconds, you keep scraping the saucepan because on the medium heat, it stays hot off the heat, and you don't overcook the eggs.
SPEAKER_08:I've seen it done on low, and you're just always scraping inward. And then so when the solids end up just staying in the middle, the liquid goes back out, and you just keep doing that. And that's supposed to be another method that works to get airy scrambled ox.
SPEAKER_03:I think it's I think it's effective. I know to which you're referring. I prefer But I don't like it. This met with the sour cream and within just a couple like heat, no heat, heat, no heat, like you're done. It's wonderful. The pan comes clean easily. It's fantastic. Ben? Yes. What have you been watching?
SPEAKER_08:Uh but what did I watch? Um, I watched Demon Knight.
SPEAKER_07:Dude.
SPEAKER_08:Because I had to miss. We were gonna go see it together, and I ended up having to work. I had a ticket and it just got wasted. Which is a real bummer. It was. It was a bummer. So I watched it.
SPEAKER_03:Ernest Dickerson Nvidia. And shouts to you for not doing the experience, but being like, shit, you know what?
SPEAKER_08:Go fucking watch this movie. I'm not gonna miss out. It was so enjoyable. What a warms the cockles. Yeah. What a what a silly tales from the crypt movie, which is exactly what it's supposed to be.
SPEAKER_03:Right. This was so funny to me. Ernest R. Dickerson was at the uh QA after the movie and had said that he just thought he was making a movie called Demon Knight. He didn't know it was a Tales from the Crypt movie for a while. And was offered to direct those sequences, which he handed over to Gilbert Adler to direct, who had done them on TV and stuff like that. And that's why they have such a specific feel uh that feels just like the show, and the movie feels like something.
SPEAKER_08:I I mean, you know that they spent so much money on getting the clipkeeper to like stand up and walk as the director on set, you know, with the like the shitty blue screen. It's like, oh, that's they're do they're going at it, but like they spent a lot of money on that.
SPEAKER_03:And a lot of time it kind of ages kind of well. The mixed media of that movie. You had said something. And Billy Zane. Oh my god.
SPEAKER_08:So he's top, he's a he's a zaniist.
SPEAKER_03:At 11 at Xaniacs Unite. We're here. I love it. I'm so glad you saw the movie. I'm so glad you enjoyed it. Great performances, great writing, great direction.
SPEAKER_08:Can I give you one interesting fact? Oh, please. Um, Death Becomeser was originally going to be a Tales from the Crypt movie.
SPEAKER_03:I did not know that. That is such a perfect movie for that. Because I these are all come up in stories.
SPEAKER_08:But I think it's like they got they got this cast, and like I think this has legs on its own, and then they I think it was something like that. I read it a while ago.
SPEAKER_03:No, and it makes sense too, because Robert Zemeckis is a Tales from the Crypt producer and obviously I guess made that his own thing, but Demon Knight doing its own thing, and we were talking about this before. There's some sort of point where almost every movie, especially horror movies or action movies, have to go fuck it for at least a moment. And this movie says fuck it at a point, and then it just says it doesn't stop. And doesn't stop saying it until the very end of the movie. Thomas Aidens. Something special. When do you do you feel that moment?
SPEAKER_08:Uh when it just they stopped giving there's now it's just like one long fuck.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, when did that moment start?
SPEAKER_08:The first problem I mean it's I mean it's it's shortly after when they get trapped in the hotel. Okay. I think at that point, like then they're just they're going ball. It's fine. Maybe maybe it's when CCH Pounder also when once they came on screen, I was just like, fuck yes, I know it was like this. Yeah, what a lot of CCH Pounder. It might have been when she when she lost her arm and then was like still like, I'm good to go. She didn't give me the vodka, give it to me. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:For me, it's one of the ultimate moves in a movie. And like Seven does this with like the credits, I think, where it's kind of setting you up for what's gonna happen. I don't really know what's going on with Demon Knight. And then there's the there's kind of these two moments that happen pretty quickly back to back. And I've seen this movie like 20 times. But the sheriff is like, all right, we're gonna go down to the station and sort this shit out. Both of the cars that were in that crash were stolen, and he's gonna take the villain and the hero.
SPEAKER_09:Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03:And Billy Zane turk turns away from the camera and then toward it and goes, Why wait? And then just lays a punch into the sheriff through his face. Yeah, through the mouth out the back of the head, get the head off of the body, and it's immediately like, This is what we're doing here.
SPEAKER_08:That's like that's right around the lockdown. Like once the hotel is like, it's like, oh, we're we're in it.
SPEAKER_03:Everybody's stuck.
SPEAKER_08:Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_03:And then when Billy Zane jumps out the window, throws off the cowboy garb, sick, all this cowboy shit, which is apparently watch the movie. So he sheds all this garb that he apparently is required to wear for I think his job, like his day job, his nine to five is doing being a demon and chasing people. Yep. But he says, uh, sick of this cowboy shit, you fucking ho dunk, podunk, whoa, them there, motherfuckers, and then cuts his hand open and like starts these demons start spawning or whatever. The movie just hits fucking 15 so fast.
SPEAKER_08:And very like, oh yeah, this this feels like Crypt Keeper demon, like the makeup style, and then like the weird uh vestigial tail/slash abdomen.
SPEAKER_03:So like like butt people, all of them.
SPEAKER_10:Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_03:What a time. I'm so glad you enjoyed it. Oh, yeah. I'm so glad you brought up CCH Pounder and Thomas Hayden Church. I love Charles Fleischer in that movie. Mildly known fact that he plays Wally the Mailman as the voice of Roger Rabbit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Please bring it up, Paul. I couldn't help myself. And just playing, like, you know, absolute stereotype character, especially for that time, you know, the the quote-unquote good guy who's just fawning over, you know, right, you know, that whole thing the movie does a really good job at subverting some of these archetypes and tearing them down and bringing them up. And I don't think you expect the hero that emerges to be that. And also, I think the movie, it's in one actor's hands and then another and then another, and it hands the movie to these other actors perfectly from act one to two to three.
SPEAKER_08:Also, always love to see um, can't think of his name, and it's not Dan Hedeya, but I always group them together. It's the the alcoholic Dick Miller.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. From Gremlins. Uh Burr shake my hand. He's great.
SPEAKER_08:Always love to see him.
SPEAKER_04:God's doing some serious thinking tonight.
SPEAKER_03:Let's get fucked up, Uncle Willie. What have I been watching? Uh, I'm gonna say one line, and I hope you will get some satisfaction out of it. I don't know. Maybe some of the listeners will. No, you're obsessed with her? And you're obsessed with her darter. You're obsessed with her and you're obsessed with her daughter. Parker Posey in Screen Three. It's a it's a deep cut. I just re-watched it recently. Deep cut was intentional, yes. I enjoyed the fucking shit out of that movie. That movie, we did Cabin in the Woods recently on this program. Solid movie. Watching Scream 3 and that the first two movies, the way the first one subverts the genre and all sorts of tropes and things, and the way the second movie is kind of honoring like all these other horror films that it's taking off of, and yeah, yeah. And the second one kind of does a similar thing, but other movies to a degree, and it feels like artists and dialogue, which is really cool. And then the third one is the like you greedy money-making fucks, I hate myself. Is that the Timothy Olafon one? Is that the college one? The second one is the Timothy Olaf one, not to give it up, but the killer uh spoiler alert, it it's cool about that one. I don't know if you like this about it. I want to hear is that his reasoning is just that he's fucking crazy. Like, I'm just fucking crazy, I just want to kill people. And I've I think that's the only one that there's been. I mean, it's good to have a backstory. Did you like the fifth one with Jack Quaid and Barrera? Oh, yeah. Yeah, I didn't mind that. I think it's a really good series, like overall and underrated series.
SPEAKER_08:And like six, I enjoyed six. Like I liked I liked six. I rewatched them after the fifth one came out. So that was a couple years ago. Yeah. So they're all kind of in there, but also mixed together. But except the first one, the first one stands alone.
SPEAKER_03:Agreed.
SPEAKER_08:Um, could not watch these as a kid. No. I saw Scream when I was 12 and had nightmares for months. No, Burrus, not. I slept with a down comforter over my head in the heat of summertime. It was awful.
SPEAKER_03:I I saw the first one at the theater, I was like, this I love this. This ruin I'm sorry, Fonzi's in this, this movie fucking ruins.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, couldn't couldn't do horror uh when I was powder wrecked me.
SPEAKER_04:Coco, cocoa, cocoa, cocaine, cocaine.
SPEAKER_03:Go on.
SPEAKER_08:I mean, the deer dies, brings it back to life, but also he's bullied this entire time, and then he gets just like he finally like feels at peace and then just like runs because something else goes wrong, and then he gets just zapped up by lightning and it's gone. And I was just like, uh, yeah, could not deal with like the death side of things yet at that age. Okay. So fucking wrecked me.
SPEAKER_03:It took me a long time to be okay with Nightmare in Ohm Street was my thing. I could not look at even a movie cover with Freddie Krueger on it until I was in my teens. Oh yeah. But I was somehow okay with Scream. Oh yeah. Not that I was in my teens, I was 70. Shut up, you.
SPEAKER_08:Horror came into my life probably like college. Good for you. That's when it that's when it opened up for me. Other than, you know, like Ernest scares stupid, which is uh, you know, a classic.
SPEAKER_03:Are you the bugger man? Who's the guy who was always talking to? Hey Vern! Was it Vern?
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, it's Vern. The uh the monsters from that movie. The little trolls, yes, they were the leftover. Oh, they're the leftover makeup uh uh from Killer Clowns. Great. Love that movie. I'm fairly certain. Love that movie too. It's the same prosthetic.
SPEAKER_03:I bet the face shape is probably the same.
SPEAKER_08:They use the same molds to make the the trolls out from and they're like you can you can tell by like just the the heights and the the character, the the weird trolls that you meet with Ernest and stuff. And I was like, I saw that recently, I was like, and I put it together, I was like, oh my god.
SPEAKER_03:This is a cool thing. You told me recently, back to your thing for a moment, that the cryptkeeper's eyes and Chucky's eyes are the same. Yeah, also they reused them. Courtney Cox's bangs in Scream 3 are the same ones from Psycho Hillbilly Human Eater number two in Last House on the left. Burris. Wow, few people know that.
SPEAKER_08:I'm surprised you knew that. Let's get to the facts. Good on you.
SPEAKER_04:Archaeology is the search for facts. Go.
SPEAKER_08:All right. Twins is a universal picture. It is rated PG, uh, released in 1988. It is an hour and 47 minutes long. Uh the budget for this movie was 15 million, uh, which would adjust it would be 41 million today. Um opening weekend was December 9th, 1988. 11.1 million dollar uh opening weekend.
SPEAKER_03:Illuminati.
SPEAKER_08:But adjusted is 30.4 million and not so Illuminati. Not so fun. Well, we can get it back. Okay. The final growth in North America was 111 million.
unknown:What?
SPEAKER_08:Yep.
SPEAKER_04:No! Yeah.
SPEAKER_08:Is that real? It is real. Oh my goodness. Adjusted is 307.2 million. And the uh final gross worldwide was 216.6 million dollars. And adjusted is a whopping 594.7 million dollars.
SPEAKER_03:Burris, true or false on every single one of these, that's just entirely too much money.
SPEAKER_08:Yes. 15 million, like a budget of 15 million in 1988, and no special effects. To get those two guys, it all went to them.
SPEAKER_03:There is one, I mean, that has to be a special effect. I hope I'll remember this, my weed addled brain. But there is one effect in this movie that I'm like, damn, that I really liked. Okay. But I don't know how special it was, really. It's probably super easy, and I'm just lame as shit.
SPEAKER_08:I think I know what you're talking about, and I can't wait for you to bring it up.
SPEAKER_03:I'm excited.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah. Okay, let's see. What other releases were that weekend? Well, I'll tell you. It was uh My Stepmother is an Alien. Another class.
SPEAKER_03:Another horny movie, though. Oh man. Very horny movie. Rocky horror picture show Earth Girls Are Easy. This movie, My Stepmother is an Alien, which we will eventually do. We'll get all the horny alien movies. How is Twins Alien? I don't know, but there's just something not right about the whole thing. Something unnatural about it.
SPEAKER_08:Um, the the the weekend top five was uh this movie, The Naked Gun from the Files of Police Squad. That's a good one.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, dude.
SPEAKER_08:Oh shit, really? Scrooged. Love Scrooged.
SPEAKER_03:Um listen to our Scrooged episode. Nothing bad. Tequila Sunrise.
SPEAKER_08:Oh shit, Oliver and Company. Hell yeah, dog. That's yeah, that's a that's a good weekend. That's uh that's a that's a good movie weekend. 1988. Way to go, 1988. Right? Special shout-out to 1988. Other films from 1988. Speaking of 1988, did I mention Little Nikita Vibes? Critters 2, the main course.
unknown:Yeah.
SPEAKER_08:Um White Mischief. Haven't heard of that film. Nope. I missed that. I don't like this Dead Heat. Nuts. Hot to Trot and a classic, Mac and Me.
SPEAKER_03:We see we finished strong there though. We got Dead Heat, Nuts, and Mac and Me.
SPEAKER_08:I always appe appreciate Paul Rudd on talk shows that brings up a clip and it's just Mac and Me. Poor Conan. Oh man. It happens. Poor Conan. Oh, it's so good. What a what a great like joke.
SPEAKER_03:One of the great recurring jokes of all time. Maybe who knows if it's the greatest. I think we could be experts on that. Depending on who you ask. Yes. I think we're depending on which. We know what we're talking about with recurring jokes, people.
SPEAKER_08:Depending on where you look on Reddit.
SPEAKER_04:You're already thinking it's kids.
SPEAKER_08:It was insane.
SPEAKER_04:Insane.
SPEAKER_08:Uh the letterboxed average for this movie is three.
SPEAKER_03:Like three on the button.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, three on button. I was gonna say three point zero, but I thought I'd just I'd just No, that was good. Use the syllables that I then just used to explain it because I'm now explaining too much. Uh hey, what's your um what's your letterboxed at Paul Ax Badly?
SPEAKER_03:What's yours?
SPEAKER_08:Uh mine is at Ben DoneBefore. Follow us, see what we rate other movies, and know all the things we're watching. I haven't done a lot on there, I'm not gonna lie. But um, every once in a while I'll go on and like try to like catch up. I'll teach you. Okay, teach me your ways.
SPEAKER_03:The the way it drives is kind of difficult sometimes, right? Or it's like the user interface.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, and like searching for a film and then like rating it, like saying that you want to see it, but then it says like that means it puts it in like your C pile sometimes. I'm like, and yeah.
SPEAKER_03:I sat with that thing for like three days, like figuring it out, and got an unhealthy obsession with it. But it took me it was I am aware. It all was almost like mastering a Mario game.
SPEAKER_08:Repetition, repetition, repetition and a game guide.
SPEAKER_03:Repetition. Again, experts of repetition.
SPEAKER_08:Tiscal and Ebert gave this movie two thumbs up. Has a rotten tomato score of critics is uh 42 and audience of 40. Whoa. It has a higher critic rating than audience rating.
SPEAKER_03:And that's pretty this is a two thumbs up movie that equivalent today to today made half a billion dollars on 40 million, which also like uh this I couldn't imagine that I don't know, so many things about this movie are confounding.
SPEAKER_08:And um yeah, Metacritic is um 50% with a 6.7 for users. So it's flip-flopped of I guess Rotten Tomatoes takes themselves more seriously. They're very prestigious. We over here at Rotten.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. They are based in Denmark. You got something there.
SPEAKER_08:Oh, well, fuck me, Rotten, and call me Denmark. Oh, I almost missed it.
SPEAKER_03:I knew it was right there on the tip of your brain. See it. My name is Julius. I'm your twin brother. Where was it? Ah, yes.
SPEAKER_08:Major award wins and nominations. Uh Golden Globes nomination for best original song. Um This is your nightbow.
SPEAKER_03:It had to be that, right? Tonight is your nightbow. That's right. Tonight is your name. It had to be that, because it also won the Grammy for Greatest Song Ever Made last year. Danny DeVito accepted on behalf of Danny DeVito.
SPEAKER_08:Oh, he was inducted into the uh Rock and Roll Hall of Fame for that song.
SPEAKER_03:It's actually just now called the Danny DeVito Tonight is your nightboro hall of fame.
SPEAKER_08:At your local um hard rock cafe. Perfect. Yeah. And uh People's Choice winner for Best Comedy, and it tied with big two movies about horny, horny fucking people.
SPEAKER_03:I mean, I think that was the 80s. Can we be honest? People are just horny though. Like what's stop it with all this non-horniness. Yeah.
SPEAKER_08:I mean, we just allowed ourselves to show it in in movies.
SPEAKER_03:Because it's natural, it's human. Come on, it's okay. It's okay.
SPEAKER_08:Everybody fucks. Well, not everybody. I mean, like at a once you become at a certain age. Not the young's, but they don't listen to that. Yeah. Okay. Um, so yeah, uh, tell me, uh, what's the cast look like for this? Who who worked on this movie? I'm gonna tell you a lot of that question.
SPEAKER_03:I'm so glad I asked. You won't be. Oh. Director of this film was Ivan Reitman. Oh. R.I.P. Kindergarten cop. We will do that on this pro. I know it has a sequel with Dolph Lungren, but you're not so top without your car, are you? Ghostbusters and Junior. The look on your face. Wasn't Danny the V doing that one as well? Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_08:They rejoined for this.
SPEAKER_03:And they bring in like Emma Thompson. Yeah.
SPEAKER_08:Like somebody very prestigious. I mean, that should have been a direct sequel to Twins just going off of that Arnold, because he's supposed to be incredible. So he's been working with doctors on an island. Absolutely. And like then he became a doctor, he like became a scientist and then impregnated himself. And it's just that story continuing.
SPEAKER_03:That is probably we're gonna talk about twins.
SPEAKER_08:That's that is that is a movie, and they they should have just connected those two. So shake my hand again.
SPEAKER_03:Okay, well done. Quite clanny. My hand, not yours. Writers of this film. William Davies flushed away, William Osborne, the real McCoy, Timothy Harris, Brewster's Millions, and Herschel Weingrad, Trading Places. Okay, especially in terms of trading places and Brewster's Millions. Like there's so many things that cross over with this movie that these gents have worked on. Director of photography of this film was Andre Bartoviak, Guiltiest In Speed. Listen to our speed episode with Christopher Morrison. Anyway, talk like David Caruso in Twins. But uh Jade was what he was the director of photography of, which also starred David Caruso. Music was Randy Edelman, who did uh the score for what I think is arguably the best score of all time. The Last of the Mohicans. Ridiculous. And the his resume is wild. There was a second person who apparently worked on the score of this movie. Georges Deleu Deleu? Deleu. The Day of the Dolphin. Do you know what that movie's about?
SPEAKER_08:Uh Dolph Lundgren? Um he uh uh like uh The Little Mermaid, and but he was a dolphin, and um and then he made this uh deal with someone to be able to go online and he turned into Dolph Lundgren. And that's and then got a uh a career in uh in uh movies.
SPEAKER_03:This is maybe the only plot better than what you just pitched. It is a movie starring George C. Scott trying to stop a plot to uh get a dolphin to assassinate the president. Oh, did not see that coming. Did not see that coming. Producers of this movie were Ivan Reitman Stop, or my mom will shoot a movie that Schwarzenegger tricked Stallone into doing.
SPEAKER_08:So the president must like go out for ocean swimming a lot.
SPEAKER_03:I haven't seen the movie.
SPEAKER_08:I'm not stuck yet. I'm just stuck on this.
SPEAKER_03:I was he gonna like do be in involved with something at SeaWorld, maybe?
SPEAKER_08:Or was it gonna be like uh you know, sharks with lasers on there? You know, was it that with dolphins with lasers?
SPEAKER_03:Because otherwise, how did we get to that point? Did they know he was gonna be visiting the the place the dolphin was? I have a lot of questions. We may have to watch this movie. Joe Medjuk produced Dave, a movie that apparently is very, very good and charming that I should re-watch for the first time since I was but only 690. I don't know why why do I know this movie? It's Kevin Klein takes over for the president because he's like a look-alack. And it's Sigorni. Apparently it's super fucking charming. I remember that being fun. Michael C. Gross, R.A.P. Ghostbusters 2 with the peace sign, and several other producers. Uh, the famous comedian Amul Braunschwago plays Julius the Long Goodbye. He has the little yellow undies in that one. Stay hungry and Maggie. Danny DeVito plays Vincent the Rainmaker, War of the Roses, uh, quite an accomplished director himself, directed that film, and Jewel of the Nile. Kelly Preston, R.I.P., plays Marnie, Jerry Maguire for Love of the Game, and Sky High. Chloe Webb plays Linda, Sid and Nancy, Practical Magic, a movie we almost did for spooky season. We were so close I had to watch it. It was so, so awful.
SPEAKER_08:Uh Chloe Webb plays Nancy, right? Is that am I in Practical Magic? No, in Sid and Nancy. Oh, she does. Okay. I was like, I was like, practical magic. I was watching this movie. Why do I know this person? I was like, and you said Sid and I was like, oh, that's it. That's it. Sorry, everything just clicked.
SPEAKER_03:Don't apologize.
SPEAKER_08:Everything just clicked for me.
SPEAKER_03:I love when things just click. She was also in She's So Lovely, because isn't she? Bonnie Bartlett was Marianne. Francis Shiloh, the Grass Harp. Marshall Bell was Webster. Nightmare in Elm Street 2, Freddy's Revenge. Yes, that one. Total Recall and Stand By Me. Trey Wilson, R.I.P. was Beat Root. I almost rated this movie on beatroots because that's what I always be doing. I beat root. That's what I do. Every chance I get, I'm very sore.
SPEAKER_08:But I can see how you got those guns.
SPEAKER_03:Bull Durham Raising Arizona, a soldier story. David Caruso was Al, King of New York, First Blood, Session 9. And if you when you're talking to a lady, you talk like David Caruso in Jade. Hugh O'Brien was Granger, Game of Death, The Shootest, Love Has Many Faces. Tony J, R.I.P. was Werner. Time Bandits, Beauty and the Beast, the Disney animated version, and Love and Death. Burris, I'm dragging us down. I'm dragging us down, man.
SPEAKER_08:Well, I have to make a public apology. Oh. Um, because I referred to something earlier as fun facts. I mean, I thought they were fun, but apparently those are just facts.
SPEAKER_03:I think we've made them more fun. I think you were making them more fun in the first half. Okay. But I need you to I need you to talk about it.
SPEAKER_08:But now is actually the uh now is the real fun facts. Now you get to hear the song. Ladies and gentlemen, fun facts.
SPEAKER_01:Fun facts, fun facts, everybody. It's fun fact time.
SPEAKER_08:I just realized we're not going to listen to the song. We're not. Um, okay. Uh we can if you really want to. Ah, I'll just listen to it when I when I listen to this. I just mute all of my parts and listen to you every and the songs. That's what I do. Okay. Good. We're the same weird. Universal Pictures saw this movie as a risk, uh, mostly because of Schwarzenegger co-leading a comedy. Jokes on this.
SPEAKER_03:Is this his like first comedy? I think so. Yeah. And he's got comedic chops, I think. Schwarzenegger's an okay actor.
SPEAKER_08:And uh which is why they only put up a$15 million budget. So that's why we have a$15, still, I think too high.
SPEAKER_03:It doesn't. If I look at this in today's standards, I I don't see$40 plus million dollars up there. And I understand the the big thing of why this was so cheap is I think between those two guys, this movie should have cost like forty, thirty-five or forty million dollars in 1980 money.
SPEAKER_08:Interesting. Schwartzenager and uh DeVito and director Ivan Reitman uh mutually decided to agree to 40% of the gross profits split evenly rather than their high upfront salaries. Oh, majority of that the 50 million didn't go to the them. That's interesting. Interesting.
SPEAKER_03:But I guess they made the right choice because this movie nowadays would have made half a well considerably yeah, considering now you're they got essentially a piece of a pie that is equivalent to four over four hundred and fifty million dollars. I don't know, crazy amounts of money.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, and it took in 260 million worldwide. Awesome money. Um the end result was uh all three earning the largest and close to the largest paychecks of their careers, which is incredible.
SPEAKER_03:Considering who those guys and what they've done.
SPEAKER_08:And they just it was just them negotiating uh quite the deal. Smartly. Yeah. Like they bet on themselves and it worked. Let's see. Almud uh Schwarzenegger and Danny DeVito uh and current racist skeleton, Terry Hulkan, have all revealed in interviews that Schwarzenegger and DeVito were given the option of doing this movie or Suburban Commando. I think they made the right choice. But I do want to see that alternate world where Danny DeVito and Schwarzenegger star in Suburban Commando. Oh my god, yes. The whole turn I movie.
SPEAKER_03:I want I want Schwarzenegger to play the Christopher Lloyd role and Danny DeVito to play the alien. That's what I want.
SPEAKER_08:But if they had done that movie, that means who would be the twins in this? Well, I'll tell you the perfect matchup. All right. It's it's Terry Hogan, you know, uh racist dirt meatbeg. Um and uh and Christopher Lloyd.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, so they were just gonna flip. The suburban commando guys were gonna be the twins, and the twins guys were gonna be the sure, sure. Yeah. But Danny DeVito.
SPEAKER_08:But I would love to see, I mean Christopher Lloyd and Danny DeVito's part, though, and twins would have been so different.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, I would have been super into that.
SPEAKER_08:I think I I think we all know what the the Hogan version would be.
SPEAKER_03:Hogan and Schwarzenegger.
SPEAKER_08:No, Hogan as Schwarzenegger's role.
SPEAKER_03:Imagine it as Hogan and Schwarzenegger in twins or Schwarzenegger and Lloyd. The way to to mix and match these guys in these two movies feels endless.
SPEAKER_08:That's a great shuffle.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. I think we ended up the with the best possible version of twins that we could.
SPEAKER_08:Yes, I agree. Yeah? Oh, yeah. Christopher Lloyd would be an interesting. I would love to see the I would love to see him read for it. You know, like one of those SNL skits where like the uh the fake auditions and stuff. With Bill Hayter. Yeah. And just have Christopher Lloyd do it.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, Malinolda.
SPEAKER_04:Son Eurigo's writing Shakespeare Body can't care.
SPEAKER_08:There was a sequel to this movie called Triplets that was uh conceived by Schwarzenegger.
SPEAKER_03:Didn't they do that in Junior though?
SPEAKER_08:That's what I mean.
SPEAKER_03:He was the one who conceived. Oh, hey. I mean, I God, your your sequel idea is so much better than this. I know, keep going.
SPEAKER_08:I know, I have great ideas. In in junior, the baby could have been Eddie Murphy, who would have played the triplet in this movie. I think I just took that one two cogs. But it feels like, you know, if this movie was made during like the nutty professor era, like or like junior time, you know, like that. Yeah. And then like it's just Eddie Murphy as a baby. And so you shoot him separately, like in baby prosthetics. So he's like, he's got like a Pudgy Army.
SPEAKER_03:Look who's talking now, right? Yeah. And then like what a Luku is talking as well.
SPEAKER_08:What what a what a thing.
SPEAKER_03:Good tabs and noodles out. The image in my head is terrifying.
SPEAKER_08:I've gone down a very bad record.
SPEAKER_03:I enjoyed it.
SPEAKER_08:Uh but uh uh the project went uh triplets, went through various stages of development uh between I did not realize it was this long, 2003 and 2020, uh before it was just put on the shelf.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, and apparently like it was on and off and on and off and on and off.
SPEAKER_08:I could also see this is going into spoilers for the movie. I could see another uh version of this where it's uh because the end of the movie they both have a set of twins.
SPEAKER_03:Happy ending.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah. So the movie could be that the sequel's twins squared, you know, and it's following the kids of Arnold Swordsneger and Danny DeVito. And that could be, let's see, Danny DeVito's side, could be Charlie Day and um Oh god.
SPEAKER_03:Uh I can't get this made Burris.
SPEAKER_08:Uh I I already know it's gonna be good. Um shoot, what's his name from New Girl? Jake Johnson? Yeah. So it'll be Jake Johnson and Charlie Day, and then the age doesn't make sense, but it doesn't matter. John C. Riley and Will Farrell are Schwarzenegger's kids.
SPEAKER_03:None of it matters, yeah.
SPEAKER_08:What a duo. And just and then meet them the kids of Schwarzenegger. Arnold Schwarzenegger revealed later on that while taking a break from filming uh during lunch, Danny DeVito offered him a cigar. And you know, Schwarzenegger is you always see him with a cigar in hand or just like in his mouth that's like. And uh and but he didn't know it was laced with marijuana. Oh and uh by the time they got back to finishing the scene, he had forgotten his lines.
SPEAKER_03:No shit.
SPEAKER_08:Of course. The thing is though, there are many moments in this film where I could see that having taken place. So now, like, there's there's a bunch of moments in this movie where it's like, think, I think he forgot what to say here.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, really? Okay. So I see it as him taking like moments. I I it's weird. I don't think he's a bad actor, and I don't disagree with what you're saying because I can see it that way too. But I see it him almost as like Julius is taking a moment to consider him. Oh, yeah. And a lot of people like that. I want to give him some credit as an actor. There were a couple that were just like and I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right.
SPEAKER_08:But I love uh yeah, I mean, I love that he's like just like this complete innocent in being dropped into the city and like not knowing much of anything about how Stranger, Strange Land. Yeah, yeah. And you know, and just the the wide smile, just wow, they do him like that. Do they really dress like this?
SPEAKER_03:What this happened? It wasn't me, it was the pavement. What books do they have on that island? I have so many questions.
SPEAKER_08:Only like martial arts and science, but not reproductive science.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, we forgot our lines apparently.
SPEAKER_08:Uh oh, and famously the idea for this film and its cast was hastily conceived in a Hollywood bathroom after the writer's initial pitch to an executive for an unrelated project that had failed.
SPEAKER_03:I think this is wrong. Okay. I think it was it was hastily conceived on this podcast, but just a few minutes ago. And I think that's what actually And that's uh Arnold Schwarzenegger now clapping back in time.
SPEAKER_05:Arnold Schwarzenegger running us up to us on the screen here. Yeah, he was.
SPEAKER_03:This podcast episode is brought to you by books. Any books you want, any books you can think of, as long as they don't have anything to do with reproduction or people liking other people or shit like that. No. Burn out. We're not into that. No. Get rid of that. Yeah. We are going to just tell you the log line to this movie, because Ben's not here. What the fuck is he gonna do? So he knows we're close to getting those Cinephile cards. He knows we're close. We almost had them on Sunday. So close. Uh, Burris, if you would be so kind.
SPEAKER_08:Yes. A physically perfect but innocent man goes in search of his long-lost twin brother, who turns out to be a short, womanizing, small time crook.
SPEAKER_03:I got I have to admit the casting of the two is is pretty fucking genius. I'm pretty sure the log line came out after they cast this. That's why you got to casting so quick. By the way, I love how they refer to him as genetically perfect and Burris. I see perfection for you now. Same smile as Schwarzenegger with the gap and the sharper canines, and yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Schwarzenegger and Jason Bateman. When you have this, you notice this. Uh again, this episode is brought to you by books, but not the kind that like that we want people reading. And let's never leave out Paul Shear. I get it. I see what you're doing here. Alright, everybody, we'll be back. Wow. We're back from break. You have to read all those books. Many books. Just a crazy, crazy amount of a lot of them had cool shapes and colors and neat characters.
SPEAKER_08:And you had to like find yeah, I like the one where you gotta like find the guy in the crowd.
SPEAKER_03:Right. That those are good. I like the colors of those.
SPEAKER_08:Did you feel like anything was missing? Well, I really wanted a book that would just like, you know, penetrate me.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah?
SPEAKER_08:And I didn't I didn't really find that. Like books about people fucking? No, I I mean, I mean, if you want to take it there.
SPEAKER_03:Okay. People just loving other people. People loving people.
SPEAKER_08:I yeah, and yeah, and fucking. But yeah. But there wasn't any.
SPEAKER_03:I felt like that too. Yeah. Yeah, but I did love no romance novels.
SPEAKER_08:No, either. Not nothing like that. We got no like fourth wings in that in that stack of books.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, wow. All right. I also found out that it's the Barn Stan Bears, or at least that's the way that they want there's no Bernstein or Stein.
SPEAKER_08:There's no Barnstein or Bernstein. But now it's Barnstein. It's Barn Stan. Barn Stan? Did I just jump to another? I how many times do I gotta jump?
SPEAKER_04:Oh Ziggy. Pull me out of here, Ziggy.
SPEAKER_03:Here we are. We're here. Ben, we almost had them on Sunday. The Cinephile cards. We were so close. We'll see you soon.
SPEAKER_02:I can't believe you've done this.
SPEAKER_03:I can't believe it's not butter. That's how I did those scramby eggs. That's not true. I always use real butter butter. Okay, good. Yeah. I don't want to. Paul's recipe corner is a serious thing. People tune into this program to hear about Paul's recipe corner.
SPEAKER_08:About your butter.
SPEAKER_03:Do you turn your own? No, I don't turn my own. Do you want to use an actor from this movie? Or do you want to name an actor that you like? Or can just try to do it? No, no, we don't have to. I'm just pitching it. I can cut this.
SPEAKER_08:No.
SPEAKER_03:Okay. Okay. You can be like, no, you know what? I do want to play. However you want to play this.
SPEAKER_08:I do. I do, I do, I do. Okay. Um, just trying to pick an actor. Sure.
SPEAKER_03:I'll pick an actor from a movie we've done that is close to your heart for multiple reasons if you don't pick one within five seconds.
SPEAKER_08:Okay. Um, let's do um what we talked about earlier.
SPEAKER_03:Let's do let's do uh let's do Mac and me's uh Paul Rudd. Okay, Paul Rudd. And you can have the freebie. You get the first movie. I think that's all means that.
SPEAKER_08:Oh, I'm gonna fail at this so bad.
SPEAKER_03:I just I just know. I always I always come in with that attitude is not like I want you to feel like you can every self never at this game.
SPEAKER_08:I always just end up drawing a blanket. I picked it. Do you want me to go for the red hot American Summer? Good pull. Clueless bitch.
SPEAKER_03:Ant-Man. Ant-Man and the Wasp. Ant-Man quantum. The Avengers Civil War. Avengers endgame. The Avengers Infinity War.
SPEAKER_08:Um I think we exhausted the game. Well now we've gotten that out of the way. Yeah, yeah. Um, is it still it's my turn now. It is. Shut up. That went the wrong way. Okay. Um uh it's um it's he um uh uh 40 something. This is 40. This is 40 something.
SPEAKER_03:I know what you're talking about. That's fine. That's fine. I know what you're talking about. Halloween six, the curse of Michael Myers.
SPEAKER_08:Uh um what is the name of this?
SPEAKER_03:I can't let you gesture forever. I'm gonna take it if you keep gesturing. Is that your pee-pee? The slap at the best.
SPEAKER_08:The 40-year-old virgin. No, that's not no, no, no, that's not the one I'm thinking about.
SPEAKER_03:Oh. But yes. I love you, man.
SPEAKER_08:I love you, man. There we go. Okay. Well, you gestured too much. I know.
SPEAKER_03:Slap at a base. And I was like, that's my dog on Mar Sadat.
SPEAKER_08:Oh, it's Anchorman, is Anchorman too.
SPEAKER_03:I'm now after I lose. You picked a good actor. Like, I thought we had a pretty good round. This is the thing when actors do things like Marvel movies. I think those of us that play this game, we get slogged by the is that person in that Marvel movie? Is that person in that Star Wars movie? Is that person it's hard to discern.
SPEAKER_08:And then you go through, and then you're only thinking about that, and you forget about everything else. And then because I was like, oh. He did the uh Nintendo commercial, the Super Nintendo commercial that they right somewhere there's a story about him cutting his hair during the clueless auditions.
SPEAKER_03:I'm almost sure of it.
SPEAKER_08:And then like long hair, and then they cut it, and he was like, Oh, oh, looks like he needs to look like a lawsuit. Nobody told me to hold like to keep it, so I cut it for this thing, and but I don't remember what that thing was. It's a great story. I'm really good at telling stories.
SPEAKER_03:I noticed. Uh, which is so apropos. What is your story of this movie? Had you seen it before? How much have you seen it? Where are we now?
SPEAKER_08:Tell me, tell me about your journey. Um, I saw it as a kid, and I probably watched it like on Laserdisc or something, you know? Something ridiculous like that. Um, I don't I can't tell you the last time I did watch it, but I could reference this movie my entire life, you know. Also, like just like them wearing the suits in general, that on its own is a good thing. It's like omnipresent. It's just there. It was yeah, it was just it's something that's kind of like always existed.
SPEAKER_03:Okay. Have you always felt like it was pretty good? Like, did you love it as a kid? Or how do you remember?
SPEAKER_08:I remember it being like, yeah, this is like this is a good like comedy, you know?
SPEAKER_03:Yeah.
SPEAKER_08:Like this is of that time, like where all these like cool buddy comedies are coming out and stuff. And it was like, yeah, it's like that was like a you know, oh yeah, twint, twint.
SPEAKER_03:And you watched this recently.
SPEAKER_08:Oh yeah, I watched it yesterday. Okay. And I and then I watched a little bit more just going back through it this morning.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, so you kind of watched it one point something, one point two two twent? One point one how many not a lot.
SPEAKER_08:I didn't I didn't. You watched it one time and then I'll just. And I just checked in a little bit more. 1.22? Yes. Okay. I'll give that to you. I was like, let me just go back and just like re-catch up on this. Because I watched it late last time. I was like, well, I just want to see this part again. Okay. Just to refresh yourself. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:Just like jump through it and for a part of me was like you that you wanted to relive certain moments, but it was more about it.
SPEAKER_08:You want to make sure it was like kind of fresh, which you know, who knows if that'll actually happen. But I tried. At least I tried. I think that's what I'm saying. I can say that.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, we'll talk when I'm editing. But for now.
SPEAKER_08:This episode just becomes a solo episode with just you.
SPEAKER_03:Just me talking to the Billy Zane drum of a.
SPEAKER_08:Uh-huh. Wait, is it drum effect? I thought what are you trying to tell me?
SPEAKER_03:Nothing. Nothing. Okay. We're not ready to shatter burst this reality yet, listener.
SPEAKER_08:I can still hear you. Now I see you laughing at me. I have eyes and ears. I have feelings.
SPEAKER_03:He's right. What have I done?
SPEAKER_08:You've penetrated my heart in the worst of ways.
SPEAKER_03:Wait, I didn't see anything about this in any of the books. Or wait, are you talking about like a tongue? Like what happens to Breaker? That's the worst way to get your heart penetrated. Oh. Remember? No. Demon Knight. Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. You blanked that out of your mind.
SPEAKER_08:Except character names.
SPEAKER_03:I'm like, I I should William Sadler, the great character actor. So you watched this last night a little bit today. Yeah. And how are you feeling about it now?
SPEAKER_08:What an interesting movie.
SPEAKER_03:Okay.
SPEAKER_08:It has a lot of different thematic elements.
SPEAKER_03:Doesn't it?
SPEAKER_08:And I forgot that the beginning was supposed to be about um making like a genetically perfect child from from uh with three with six fathers. Right. And I was like, oh, we're off to a weird start. And it was like, and then they introduced and it was and then there was they introduced the mother, and it was like, and she was the father. The child was like, oh, this is getting weird.
SPEAKER_03:It's like vegetable jerked off in a petri dish to make the Captain America stuff. And then they put it into like a joybook.
SPEAKER_08:And then they put it into like a potato masher that glows blue. To make the milkshake.
SPEAKER_03:And then and you're already in the weeds a little bit. So you feel weird about this movie.
SPEAKER_08:I mean, it was just like, I don't remember this. So, like, oh, what a what an interesting way to start a film.
SPEAKER_03:For a PG movie, and we just did Poltergeist, which is also a PG movie somehow. For a PG movie, not only is this movie horny, this movie is all about the science of reproduction. Yes, I don't, isn't it?
SPEAKER_08:I haven't read a book. I don't I don't know. I haven't read much. There were no access to those. No. I I mean they didn't they didn't show the stork come by.
SPEAKER_03:No, but but it does have very adult themes. Like it's a very adult. Everyone in this movie holds a gun except Arnold Schwarzenegger.
SPEAKER_08:But like present day, like that whole sequence is like, oh, it's a little uncomfortable.
SPEAKER_03:It's the movies that were PG in the 80s, it's uh it's kind of wild.
SPEAKER_08:And especially when you consider the people who were involved in those movies that you know and then you know, and then find out they say, like, oh, and the mother died in childbirth before, but then they didn't know that there was a twin. And then you know you've got like you've got baby Schwarzenegger and baby DeVito, and then DeVito like kicks Schwarzenegger's leg and like are you super down on this then? What's your current no? I just it was just a weird way to start. It just like caught me off guard about how this movie begins.
SPEAKER_03:So you're basically on a weird journey, like it's a strange journey. You feel like Arnold Schwarzenegger does. I you have to you do have to rate this movie. I know. I will. I I enjoy it.
SPEAKER_08:I like I enjoyed it. I was just like, it was just like, oh, it's not how I thought I remembered it starting. Sure. That makes sense if I saw when I was a kid, so I probably just went out of my head completely.
SPEAKER_03:So it's like the beginning is like a an entire movie made for streaming these days.
SPEAKER_08:And then it's and then it's like all about you know finding your family. I adore it. And then it goes on this weird heist journey that turns into a road trip with a love story. Well, and then back into a I know what the movie's about.
SPEAKER_04:I know.
SPEAKER_08:I'm just like, no, talk about it. But I was saying, like, it has a lot of different facets. Like, there's a lot of different facets in this movie. I agree with you.
SPEAKER_03:As I was watching, this has like these all these beats are a very busy movie. I have more notes on this movie than I do on a lot of movies. That's that's what I was trying to say. You can rate them you're in a safe place. It's okay to like twins, bro. It's alright. It's alright.
SPEAKER_08:I mean, it's still enjoyable, and I mean it's it's enjoyable, it's fun to watch, and it's their I love that their chemistry is good. Uh so I mean, I give it like um three and a half carwhees.
SPEAKER_03:That's one of the really iconic parts of the movie. Did you see me do the two-wheel thing? I can teach you.
SPEAKER_04:We don't like a wise ass. Smart ass. I can teach you. I read the book.
SPEAKER_03:Apparently, the procreation part was no problem. Book or no. Me! Yeah, well, have what do you think about this film? When did you first see it? Thank you for asking. I want to say the first time that I saw this movie, my mom had rented it. I was young, I was but only, it was before I knew I had a twin, so I must have been very young. I remember liking this movie quite a bit in terms of being just like massively entertained. I for sure had a huge crush on Kelly Preston.
SPEAKER_08:I thought you were gonna say Danny DeVito.
SPEAKER_03:Do I have to say it? Why do you invite always make me say it? Uh because you just just Because Danny DeVito is a gorgeous sexual creature. She shows gorgeous locks. Oozes confidence. Yeah, you can bite my nose off, Danny DeVito. Fine with me. Just the tip. The tip of the nose.
SPEAKER_04:Leave the rest alone. Bite your gotcha nose.
SPEAKER_03:Everybody on this program knows I do love a Danny DeVito appearance, writing, directing, whatever.
SPEAKER_08:Oh, me too.
SPEAKER_03:Big Danny DeVito. True Renaissance man. Yeah, it was really well put. Thank you. Wow. Yeah. He is. He is that. This movie for me also has been like pretty omnipresent. I've seen this movie probably a dozen times or more in my life. But I had not watched it for several years up until this year. One night I was very, very tired. I had been doing much throughout the day. I turned it on and by gum, wouldn't you know it? I finished it. And thought, what a charming movie. I am exhausted. I was already tired. Why did I stay up and watch this whole movie? As you had mentioned, it's so busy. There's so many plot lines, there's so much going on.
SPEAKER_08:It jumps like from genre or like you know, story track to story track. It's like, oh, what? And then they're like, but they're all like combining as they're going.
SPEAKER_03:And I saw the movie Good Fortune recently, the movie where Keanu Reeves is an angel, and Seth Nogan and Aziz Ansari Body Swap. Good. And Kiki Palmer. I liked it enough, like similar to this movie. And I'm gonna I'm gonna give these two movies, I think, the same rating in the end. We're gonna get there, I promise, pretty quickly. How quickly, I don't know. But as quickly as twins. I watched this then. I went to Mo Slice. It's a cute movie, it's very charming. People like twins. And watching this movie with another person made me so conscious of the way the movie starts, like and the science of the movie, like we were talking about, and the science of the reproduction piece, and then it's a PG movie. And it's like, oh, this is a PG movie because it's Reitman, Schwarzenegger, and Davida. That's the only reason this movie is P. This is like on the absolute ragged edge of PG. I also Found this renewed reverence in terms of like the lines and some of the moments. Like you were talking about the two-wheel car thing and stuff. And fucking A of Arnold Schrott Snegner isn't a really talented comedic actor in terms of timing.
unknown:Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:It doesn't hurt when you're working with Danny DeVito or Pamela Hayden and uh the folks in Kindergarten Cop and some of the other comedies that he's done. Doesn't hurt. But man, he's fucking charming in this movie.
SPEAKER_08:He can be very endearing. And I think playing the innocence, which is his whole the whole character.
SPEAKER_06:I'm a big dumb strong guy.
SPEAKER_08:Living in a city or dating or anything.
SPEAKER_03:Schwarzenegger has gotten pretty much. I just know history and science and but not diad. Science. So I also just I find myself still very entertained by this movie that I watched it last night. So in the course of I'm gonna say eight or nine months, probably nine months. Uh-huh. You've watched a few times. Nine months in the last year. I've watched this movie three times. Maybe like nine and a half months.
SPEAKER_07:Nine and a half weeks. Let's talk about that movie. You want to talk about secretary? I want to talk about nine and a half weeks. No. So never solo.
SPEAKER_08:That can be your solo episode.
SPEAKER_03:Or always solo episodes. Podcasters are sitting here masturbating. No, like actually.
SPEAKER_08:I I'm just I'm just another just another beat root.
SPEAKER_03:That's what I that's what I was gonna rate this movie. Beaten roots, beat beating myself, beaten root. This is the major switch for me between the last viewing and this viewing, and it was part of what you hit on. Too many premises, things that I kind of knew, but also just like holy fuck of some of it where I guess I shouldn't be saying.
SPEAKER_04:Don't talk about this in a PG movie.
SPEAKER_03:Because yeah, probably have the hard cover. I don't know. I this is why I'm not with the MPAA, but I'm gonna move this movie from a three and a half of my most recent viewing to a three with a heart, which for me means this movie personally to me is a reviewable, enjoyable movie, regardless of the level of execution or quality of filmmaking. I think it still works today.
SPEAKER_08:It hasn't aged as well as I agree. Oh, hello, hello, hi. A cat just appeared in my lap.
SPEAKER_03:Scared the crap out of me. Less appeared and more demanded. Sandcat doesn't fuck around. Uh what did you rate this movie again? Remind the people when you're done with your fucking heart attack.
SPEAKER_08:Uh I said uh three and a half. I went over three and a half because I was still endearing. I know I have to just, you have to just I had to go in. I once I was like, okay, this movie was is 80s, so I have to go in knowing when it was made and not come at it with a this was made last week kind of kind of ideal.
SPEAKER_03:So three and a half wheelies.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:I'm going to go with the three milkshakes with a heart. Three DNA milkshakes. Just a bunch of dudes jerking off into a petri dish trying to make Captain America. It's totally normal. It's totally fine. Hang out.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah. Wow.
SPEAKER_03:Hey, everybody, we're gonna get the movie!
SPEAKER_04:And now, a feature presentation.
SPEAKER_03:So the voiceover, does it make it easier for you walking through the beginning of this movie? I mean, yes, because it's the only thing that explains anything. I find the voice endearing too. The voice actor is in a million things. Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_08:Very impalatable. And it and it and it also so it's weird because it it it makes it sound like at the beginning, it's like, oh, is this the father? Because it kind of has it's a very similar like the dialect is is not far off.
SPEAKER_03:I know they're not the same, but the I mean he did raise Schwarzenegger, though. That guy with that diet the dialect, he's the guy who raised him on the island. Yeah. So I mean that that adds up. Like some of the detail-oriented stuff in this movie, uh, maybe they go a little too in-depth.
SPEAKER_08:They penetrate a little too much maybe, maybe just a little for a movie that's not supposed to know much about it.
SPEAKER_03:Well, and the movie's all uh I feel like the movie is very upfront in that it's all about the lies that we keep within our families, like the familial deceptions. Some of these things are voluntary, some of these things are not. Some of these things are based on communication that we choose or choose not to have.
SPEAKER_08:But I think the movie is asshole doctors who just don't that too. They've old desinformation.
SPEAKER_03:Absolutely that too. Which I love that they also we'll get into it. Well, we're starting the movie. We're ripping and roaring, and I like that we're already getting into it as you're saying. The whole thing where everybody's been told that everybody died. And even in the beginning of the movie, we're told by the narrator, who is, I guess, unreliable, that the mother was killed during childbirth. By the way, probably because those babies were fucking huge. Both of those babies, each of those babies was one Danny Davito. Those babies are massive.
SPEAKER_08:I mean, later on, I think I think I think I think the doctor, the narrator doctor, at least, I think believed that the mother died in childhood because it seemed like only one knew the truth.
SPEAKER_03:Right. Well, and it was all kind of fit. That's the mystery. This is the thing that I was trying to say about Good Fortune that I missed earlier, aside from saying that I enjoyed it or the similar rating. There wasn't really a villain in Good Fortune, and that works in its favor. This movie has so many villains.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, yeah, it does.
SPEAKER_03:And it's too much. Where it's like if they're overlapping at some point. Oh my goodness. So fucking we flash forward past the Captain America cocktail, mom's dead, dad's dead, two babies were born.
SPEAKER_08:To immediate uh adults, Arnold, like, I have a twin. Yeah. And and then the voice was like, I didn't think he'd want to leave the island. And it's like, I gotta go find them.
SPEAKER_03:Do you think that one of those babies that was as big as Danny DeVito that's claimed to have killed the mother, maybe like if it were quoting kind of pinhead in a soft way, it would be like, I'll tell you whole apart. And that's how she died. Those I can't get over how huge those fucking babies are. They're so big.
SPEAKER_08:Not newborn.
SPEAKER_03:Not at all. Not at all. Those are fully trained actors. Look who's acting now. But Julius' daily life on the island is kind of idyllic.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, and he's like just working in with the scientists doing science stuff and reading books. But he's a virgin. But and doesn't know what to do. There's no books about that. It's just such a strange island. I kept waiting for like Ricardo Montebomb to show up.
SPEAKER_03:What?
SPEAKER_08:What's just like as he's like leaving the island, just you see him just like waving his tattoo.
SPEAKER_03:His assistant.
unknown:Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:Fantasy island. Yeah. The South, the newer South Parks. Oh God. So Arnold Schwarzenegger's like, wait, wait, I have a twin brother. I gotta bounce from this island. Yeah. And the scientist sees him off. I do love the visual joke of Schwarzenegger rowing that boat so fast that it's out of the water.
SPEAKER_08:Yes. Oh, so quickly, yeah. It's pretty so strong, and like they make sure to tell you that he's trained in all of the martial arts. Right. And that he can speak several seven or eight languages. Yeah. But we never see him speak any of those languages in the movie.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, yeah, you're right. Do we do we even see or hear him understand any of those languages?
SPEAKER_08:No, I don't think anyone ever speaks a different language at around him.
SPEAKER_03:So it's really just to set up the fighting.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah. So it was like he's smart and knows how to fight, but he's a virgin. And and completely innocent in the ways of the modern world.
SPEAKER_03:And city life and the flip is when that kind of entry, like that prologue, that short bookend, starts the movie, and then the movie really gets going after the titles and Schwarzenegger. And Danny DeVito sleeping with another woman's wife. Danny DeVito.
SPEAKER_08:And he's just like a scumbag. Like, ding dung, I gotta go. And then stunt man Danny DeVito climbing out of a window, second story window, and shimming down the sub wall.
SPEAKER_03:We love you, Danny. Just absolutely scaling walls like no other. It's wonderful. Spider-Man-esque.
SPEAKER_08:Always gotta acknowledge the stuntman of this world.
SPEAKER_03:Well, and he immediately he leaves from cheating on some or leading someone to cheat on their spouse with him. And then he's immediately hit hitting on another random woman. And then he picks up his ex-girlfriend. Yeah, his ex on and off girlfriend. Whose sister's first line is don't give him any money.
SPEAKER_09:You got it.
SPEAKER_03:And Danny DeVito is hiding in this. Is it the random restaurant or do the sisters work there?
SPEAKER_08:I think the sisters work there.
SPEAKER_03:Okay. But we have to guess.
SPEAKER_08:Yes. Yeah, I didn't get it until he was like crouched down, and then the other sister gets asked, like, oh, him? No, I wouldn't let him in even if he was crawling on all four, you know, serve him and dumps like food on like crumbs on him and stuff like that. Which I like. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:Because he earns immediately that it's like this guy is a piece of shit. He is terrible. And it's very nice that the sisters hide him from these brothers he owes$20,000 to. This is one of 15 different fucking storylines in this movie, by the way. We've already gone through two or three. And Burris is already tie-tai. So it may just be me and Sandcat who caused his heart attack, by the way. And if you need to end up calling the police, let them know that Sandcat did it. They won't believe you. She's too charming and gorgeous. She's I just I was tucked so far into the table, so I didn't see the cat.
SPEAKER_08:And I just like appeared like.
SPEAKER_04:Did you see her eyes?
SPEAKER_03:Yes, I was like, what? Julius by this time now is flying to Los Angeles as Vincent is running away from people he owes money, trying to find money, parking tickets. He's got no real job or whatever, no real anything. He's still not going to be able to do that.
SPEAKER_08:And we learn even more like he's he's he's he's uh stealing vehicles from the corps uh he's surviving, yeah.
SPEAKER_03:Long-term parking lot. And he has got he's got some homies that help him out. But Julius is flying to LA, and he it's the first time he's heard like rock music. Oh god. And he he doesn't flirt with this flight attendant, and that's what like it seems like kind of charms her. This is a nice little acting moment, but it is also one of the other moments is we've already had a couple in this movie where Schwarzenegger like leans over and he like checks out the flight attendant, and the music turns up and it's like used for laughs, and it feels kind of like a John Hughes movie. And these are things that I think we don't necessarily endorse anymore, necessarily. But he is eating everything when he gets to Los Angeles.
SPEAKER_08:His yakada yak is hunting.
SPEAKER_06:It's yakada yak. You got the tag on the trash.
SPEAKER_08:I can't even think of the words, I can't even understand him.
SPEAKER_06:Yakada yak, don't talk back. I sorry my full style. It's like that was just musical of you doing the song.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, how do you know the lyrics then?
SPEAKER_08:Oh, did they have a book of lyrics? I thought this was poetry. I did not know this was rock and roll music.
SPEAKER_03:They didn't teach you about fucking, but they taught you about yakity yak. And you didn't know that was about fucking. Come on. So I love in this montage of Schwarzenegger's strange, uh, strange person in a strange landing, where he sees uh Stallone's uh poster. What a what a great call-out. Like those two guys going after each other in the 80s and 90s is so wonderful in Last Action Hero and other movies. But when they when Vince and Julius cross paths during this moment, oh, right. And they're both scratching their asses.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, outside of the the the Chinese theater.
SPEAKER_03:Right. This one moment is supposed to set up like, hey, now that they're kind of close to each other, they can find each other always, just so you know.
SPEAKER_08:And it's I think is that what that's trying to set up? I mean, they it they kind of go back where they revisit it later, so it's but like that that twin sense, you know, and also but it also shows how alike they are. Right. Ah, yes, of course, of course they're related. They both did they both scratch their bus at the same time.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, they came from the same Petri disc of Jerkov. Oh boy, they're both the same Captain America. So Vince steals cars and Julius defends his suitcase accidentally.
SPEAKER_02:Do they yeah, do people really well this stuff?
SPEAKER_08:And it's like, yeah, if if you if you're lucky, gross and and I'm like, ah, yes, and this is this was in the day and age where like pit pocketers just like rode motorcycles to grab your stuff on Hollywood Boulevard, on the walk of fame. It was a dangerous time. I remember seeing just a range of like yeah, motorcycle bag grabbers.
SPEAKER_03:How satisfying is it though, that moment.
SPEAKER_08:Oh, it's great. Oh, just I mean, you know, the comedy of the yeah, the motorcycle goes by and tries to grab a suitcase, and then he just gets pulled right off the bike and slams onto the ground.
SPEAKER_03:And Schwarzenegger's holding onto the suitcase the entire time. And the way that dude's skull cracks the pavement. There are a couple shots in this movie that I really like, and this was one of them when the motorcycle comes through, it's like, okay, this is an okay little action sequence, I guess. And dude hits the pavement, the shot of the bug's eye view of the playmate's neon sign, and how LA this movie feels. A lot of it until it doesn't when we leave LA. But it's such a great little LA movie for a while.
SPEAKER_08:It's just very like look at Hollywood. Here's Hollywood, here's Ralph's, yeah.
SPEAKER_03:He here's the Walk of Fame, and Julius says, the pavement was he sending me, I hope you're okay, and they're weirded out by him.
SPEAKER_08:Uh-huh. Is pretty great. Let me carry you to a doctor. Yeah. He's like, Let me get you a car. It's like, no, I'm just gonna pick you up and run.
SPEAKER_03:I wonder if this is a fa yeah, no, don't. We're okay. Just go away. I like it a lot.
SPEAKER_08:When when Vincent is wear a helmet. Yeah, right. I will. The man who doesn't know how to drive vehicles but knows vehicle safety.
SPEAKER_03:Right. And vehicle alarms and vehicle, all sorts of vehicle things. Two wheelies, I need better lists. But that's my thing. I'm not I'm not always making lists. I should. Steven, let me know. When Vincent almost gets arrested here, or Vincent almost, Vincent gets fucking arrested here because of his unpaid parking tickets and being in handicap spots.
SPEAKER_08:Because he was in the handicap spot and he gets look at me.
SPEAKER_03:Like, of course it was like when he says, Do I look normal to you? When they ask him if he has a sticker, that for me is the moment where I'm like, I really want to hate you because you're a terrible person. But when he says, Do I look normal to you? the sincerity of it and the quickness of it and the sharpness of it, of the like, I'm a survivor.
SPEAKER_08:My life has been I am the way I am because of many very distinct situations that circumcurrency circumstances.
SPEAKER_03:Yes, with grandma Gilmore. Right. Oh no. You know that uh Mr. Mista lady?
SPEAKER_02:Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_03:I uh I think I killed her. Mista! Mr. Too bad we didn't get that movie a while ago. But when he visits Julius visits the orphanage and gets the breakdown from even the sister at his orphanage, where apparently he lost his virginity to one of the sisters at the orphanage.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, ruined, yeah. Because Julius is a virgin. And then she had to leave because she broke her vow. I also like the night's nice thing of like um he knew where he slept, but got the reasoning all wrong. Right. Like to save everyone from the fire is like actually, there's only better when one fire here, and it was it was caused by him.
SPEAKER_03:We think it was Vincent.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, we think it was Vincent.
SPEAKER_03:Pretty sure. So Vincent has basically never been wanted. He's always had to survive on his own and scratch, things like that. And then also, like coming to terms with the fact that these cars he's stealing, the people that have to deal with it, their time and energy is valuable, the money that they lose and stuff is valuable. People are hurt by this. The ones who ultimately hopefully are really hurt by these sorts of things are the insurance companies that rob people every single fucking day. So it is terrible that he survives the way he does. But there are things that people do uh every day that are nice and legal that cause more people more pain and issues. Yeah. So Vince is in jail, and Julius gets the idea to check the jails from the orphanage because that's what they assume Vincent is. Okay, and then he picks the correct jails. Yeah. Because the twin mind. You assume it he must have just picked it. He didn't go to like the county registrar. He doesn't know it.
SPEAKER_08:He didn't make calls like, hey, do you have uh someone by this name in your in your jail right now?
SPEAKER_03:Were Los Angeles County municipal rules and contacts in one of the books on the island? Oh yeah, he was that was one of his favorite.
SPEAKER_08:He knows exactly what holding.
SPEAKER_05:I know all the laws of Los Angeles County. Traffic, penetration, vibration.
SPEAKER_04:Ruination.
SPEAKER_08:I'm the governor. He's waiting to meet him and then sees this big, tall, muscular man walk by and like, uh, and oh mist um.
SPEAKER_03:The fact that Schwarzenegger plays that so well, DeVito plays it so well, that they play up the size difference between the two of them and the look difference. And it is great when they come together how ridiculous the premise of this movie is. And that's the whole thing, that's what the movie goes on. The casting and the premise.
SPEAKER_08:It just and it just they keep pushing that. Like, even to like like once he realizes, like, oh, I am at the right booth that Danny DeVito is my brother. Okay, and then he starts talking to him. And Danny Devito picks up the phone and is like, you gotta use the phone.
SPEAKER_03:Bozo. He calls him a bozo. Immediately a bozo. And Schwarzenegger's only comment is well, not identical twins. And Danny DeVito's like, no shit.
SPEAKER_02:Same matter, can I buy some space?
SPEAKER_03:What really? DeVito is able to get Schwarzenegger, who, as far as DeVito knows, is just some fucking crazy guy.
SPEAKER_08:Yep. I'm just gonna like I can take advantage of him just like I do uh to get by otherwise.
SPEAKER_03:Yep, they've set this up nicely that he's totally fine with this. And Schwarzenegger pays to get him out, pays to get his car out of impound, which includes all the traffic violations. And so how much money did Schwarzenegger come with?
SPEAKER_08:Uh, whatever. I mean, like that must be the briefcase. Like the briefcase must be filled. It's just cash.
SPEAKER_03:No sandwich?
SPEAKER_08:No.
SPEAKER_03:No. What about a book about the three rules of a crisis situation? I mean, I I think that's I think that was his favorite book.
SPEAKER_08:Because he ref he references the crisis situation.
SPEAKER_03:You forgot that's not the rule of the crisis situation. This movie does the rule of the three beats through as many storylines as it can.
SPEAKER_08:As they possibly can.
SPEAKER_03:It's so tiring. Vincent, when he gets his car out, is now like, I'm gonna fucking ditch this guy, and just leaves Julius in a parking lot. He's so full of energy.
unknown:That's right.
SPEAKER_04:That's all he says.
SPEAKER_03:This is when we're now introduced, because Danny DeVito has a chance to be a scumbag again, and whenever he's alone, that's what he does. We find out that he is stealing a Cadillac with is it a snow cone like a is this after the desk? Is this uh is this after he goes back to the office? I think this is about at the oh no, that's before he goes to the office. He steals the Cadillac and then goes back to the office and is like, we're pausing business.
SPEAKER_08:Yes, and then uh and all your stuff's getting repossessed.
SPEAKER_03:Yep, and the Cadillac has like a jet engine in it, is what it is. It's not a Wadahita, it's not a Snow Cone maker, it's not an espresso machine. His secretary's like Aqua Velva, and he's like, mmm, sexual assault, and then throws the Aqua Velva in the trap.
SPEAKER_08:Hey, basically, you're fired because we're like, you know, they just took all our furniture and stuff, and like, oh, thanks for the birthday present, and then just like kisses her in just I'll call ya.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. I think I will say he does as right by her as possible. Like, oh yes, yeah. By the time we get to the end of the movie, there's uh that that's a beat that they make sure to come back and hit. So Arnold shows up as the claim brother enforcer is there for like we want our 20 grand. Yeah, again, Arnold just showing up. I knew you'd be here. Yeah. And Arnold goes over the first rule of a crisis situation, and it's the first of three times?
SPEAKER_08:Yes, yeah, yeah. And what is the first of three times? I don't crisis. I don't remember.
SPEAKER_03:You moved too soon. I felt like that was all of them though. Prepared to have your blood. Love called. Like I think that well, and the third one I think wasn't real. No, no. That was and it was a very weird.
SPEAKER_05:The three beats of a Hollywood script is what the real rule is.
SPEAKER_02:We've got to get out of the situation that we wrote ourselves into.
SPEAKER_03:Hey, they had saved the cat on the fucking island, but they didn't have the Kama Sutra? Nope. Shit. When Schwarzenegger, this is the moment, Burris, that I'm like, damn.
SPEAKER_04:Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_03:They get in a fight, the Enforcer guy in Schwarzenegger, and Schwarzenegger, they use two different shots to be like Schwarzenegger's lifting this guy off the ground.
SPEAKER_08:But love that he didn't like ankle converse and shorts.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, it's great. He's a style icon. He's got like a blade, like a weird fabric blazer on. I don't know what it is. I love the wardrobe in this movie. Across the board, it's so fucking 80s. Yeah, it's such a time capsule. Boom, don't be bad. When it's his first t shirt. T-shirt.
SPEAKER_05:I'm still kicking. Great.
SPEAKER_03:When Schwarzenegger throws dude to the back of the elevator here, I'm like, awesome. Oh that looks great. I'm sure it's a wire.
SPEAKER_08:Oh, you can see the wire.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, I didn't notice it.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, at the end, I could you could see it against the wood paneling uh slash styrofoam of the inside of the elevator. Awesome. It just moves a little bit. It was like, I got it. I also I love seeing moments like that in older films where I say you can see the practical effect. That's there, like you hide it with it's just a black wire, and that's all you do. You don't you don't like go and post and erase it. You just it's just there.
SPEAKER_03:We learned that in speed with the bus that exploded that was being towed by us, like a Chevy S10 or whatever it was. I love like what you're saying. It's just like a brave, talented stunt person that's able to really convincingly play this role, and or it's an actor that's brave enough to do the stunt. Because I think it's the same guy. I think I was more focused on the guy, but like the motion of him flying in the back of the elevator is very effective. Yeah. And another one of our twin moments is I think this is the end of the first act. Oh, we're still going here. Arnold Intuits, it's$20,000 that DeVito owns, and we're off on the bro venture.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, he owes a shit ton of money.
SPEAKER_03:A lot of money.
SPEAKER_08:And then it was um, hey, can you um I got this Cadillac and I need to get this to uh my friend, I gotta drop it off so then they're gonna split cards up? Yeah, for the for the kids, and and then I was like, I don't know how to drive.
SPEAKER_03:And he he like reads a book in two wheels. Yeah, you're just like going on, like, I've only been driving. No problem. Uh Chloe Groove and Kelly Preston, who are they're just bombshells.
SPEAKER_08:And they're just are they just did they just randomly come across them? Did I forget? Did Danny DeVito like know that they were at the grocery store?
SPEAKER_03:I think it's twin energy man. I think those two twin men are supposed to be with those two non-twin women. They're just sisters. Are they fraternal twins or are they? They're just sisters. I mean they're both bombshells. Well, Cazaro says like, your sisters. Yeah, he's so excited after he gets caught with the Playboy and is like, I didn't know this was in you.
SPEAKER_08:Well, yeah, what a what a meat cute. It's gonna they're gonna end up together after that, right?
SPEAKER_03:And he's so embarrassed about it. And DeVito's like, oh that there would be this kind of pictures in the in the Playboy, and DeVito being like, Oh my god, you're a virgin, and Arnold being like, That's private. And you go through Vince's kind of daily life, like his apartment's kind of messy and it's filled with a lot of snack food, and he microwaves take out and shit like that. And Vince kind of breaks down the experiment for us again as an audience, as it's been broken down for him again by Schwarzenegger off camera. Like there's a fade, and that's what happened. It's all told to us through stories that are apparently a croc, and they go through that DeVito thinks is a croc, and the McClain's attack again. Can't get past these guys, and now Webster's involved, and he kills the guys that lost the car.
SPEAKER_08:And it's it's another fucking they've we've got another plot element now of like, oh, the car was there for scientists who are gonna pay and drive this thing because they were selling it to some other person, you know. We don't know much about it, and right, but now we've got this like assassin/slash courier trying to get the product back bag made.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, yeah. Vince is in this stolen car that is supposed to be for the kids and finds out, oh shit, I can make some money for this. And Julius finds out they've been lied to, and all this shit has to come together for them to be like, we're gonna go find our mom and deliver this car so Vince can get his renegotiating but not five million dollars.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, and Julius the whole time is like, You're my brother, I will help you. Right. So I'm gonna help you do this thing.
SPEAKER_03:Altruist the whole time. Even when Marnie walks in on him singing and showering some yakity sex and checks out his dong in a mirror. Like the movie is so fucking.
SPEAKER_08:He's just like, uh, let me just his muscles and he's like, Oh, I should probably change this. Oh, yes.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, I know Danny DeVito killed the mother during childbirth, but you can kill someone with that thing, terminator.
SPEAKER_08:She's like actively drooling.
SPEAKER_03:Everyone in this movie is equally horny. I'll give it that. Yeah. So even the neighbors, like, I made some cookies. Yeah, great. I can't wait to toss them later. Yeah, because he thinks that that's what you're supposed to do. Toss your cookies is toss your cookies, according to Danny DeVito, about being sweet. But even the neighbor that's like, don't sleep with that man and don't give him any money. The pussy this guy pulls is insane. Insane. It's the it's the it's the hair. I think it's the confidence.
SPEAKER_08:I don't know. Maybe it's that.
SPEAKER_03:Well, and it's maybe it's not the pulled back man but it's not the skulllet, the cigal ponytail without the shoe polish, like widow's feet. DeVito's response about the neighbor is I cleaned her pipes once. It's exactly what you'd expect.
SPEAKER_08:It's from the skill, like it is on point for that character.
SPEAKER_03:And do you feel like it's part of the movie that hasn't aged super perfectly?
SPEAKER_08:No, because I mean, like, everyone knows that. I mean, it's more just like the womanizing aspect, but like not that. Right. I cleaned your I cleaned your pipes once. Like, I think at that point, it's we're in a comedy. Like, yeah, it's like we know who this person is. It didn't feel out of place for this character to say that. So do you feel like Or maybe at that point it's so much had happened. I was just like, all right.
SPEAKER_03:Do you feel like part of our problem with the DeVito thing is that we're jealous? Are we jealous?
SPEAKER_08:Like it's it was just a different I mean, like parts of it age better than other parts. That's all I like. It was more of that beginning that was like, huh.
SPEAKER_03:How can he be so confident and be such a Lothario? But just jealous?
SPEAKER_08:It's all but it's all fake. It's all just surf-rise.
SPEAKER_03:He's not happy, man.
SPEAKER_08:No, you see him in those moments of just like loneliness, and you just like you see his despair. He's so and then he just like he just he translates it into anger and grumpiness. And apparently that's like really attractive.
SPEAKER_03:Apparently, you're right. It were and works for him in the movie, anyway. So they decide we're out of here, we're leaving LA, and Webster shows up just as they're leaving. The guy, the bagman who's needs the jet engine. I we gotta, I gotta keep linking all this shit together. You gotta link this shit together, Burris. It's chains, it's pounds, it's yards, it's miles of chains.
SPEAKER_08:We still don't know what the thing in the trunk is. Yeah, we you know, as it always I mean, like it just it looks like a bomb. Like if this movie was made two years later in 1990, it would have been a bomb, it would have been terrorists, and that would have been that.
SPEAKER_03:I like I'm so glad it's not because it's another fucking storyline. Yeah, but thank goodness that it is the kind of interestingness of like, yeah, it's just corporate espionage, man. I do kind of like that. Like, this is how shit gets done. The claims show up at Vince's at the same time as Webster.
SPEAKER_08:Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_03:And that poor fucking abandoned cat that's just like, I will eat garbage, please. Please feed me, just let me outside. This man traps me in here for days. All I have is stuff to read. That's all I have. And Webster finds like what is like uh an address written down or something? That's what it was of the artist retreaters or something, or the Los Alamos, Los Alamos. Why doesn't Webster just fucking shoot, like kill them? They saw his face too. He shot the scientists, he shoots them in the line. I mean, maybe because they're like in the same business. Oh yeah, because they're all scumbags.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, respect to uh scumbags code. Yeah. You're here to kill okay, yeah.
SPEAKER_03:Okay, fine.
SPEAKER_08:I'll give you a pick. Like we're all we're in the same guild. Oh, 405? Oh yeah, 253. Oh, great, yeah. Cool.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, super. Bang, bang. So the room with your feet. Oh, shoot. Bang, getting shit done. Arnold busts through DeVito's shirt that DeVito's been like mad he's been wearing.
SPEAKER_08:Also, how how does that how does he fit? I don't know. For that long, even. How did it button? I don't know. How did it hit his waistline? I don't know. The shoulders on the man, the traps. And like now it's like, ah, we should probably get him a new shirt because he flexed and just flexible boner. Oh, that's right. He gets into the car and sees and sees are just like ready. And he's just like, oh, and uh this is his PG film, so this is the election moment.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, we're not at any point. So euphemism for the ding dong, folks. Well, I know the books, the books aren't there, but come to the review review, come to the review review, and we will come, we will tell you about the reproduction and the boners. The father's bulge, dad's bulge. There's a lot of things. There's a lot of horny uh movies done by this podcast. Yeah, baby. We try. This is what people bring to the pot. Thank you. Thank you, everyone, for your horny, horny movies. Because you're born to be bad. It was your first t shirt. I love that line. Because Arnold's so happy about it. It's a t-shirt. Yeah.
SPEAKER_08:And it's there's like there's a picture on it.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. There's a childlike nature to him that feels so honest.
SPEAKER_08:His smiling grin is just so good. It's it shouldn't work, but it works so well.
SPEAKER_03:I'll just the camera angle and him doing the same pose as the shirt. Yeah, and looking around. Okay, so who's lying to who? We have to go to Los Alamos to find out. And the worst security guard ever lets Arnold Schwarzenegger kick a door like 12 feet into a room, and he's like, tell us the truth. Why are we born?
SPEAKER_08:And the doctor kind of tells them the biggest asshole in the world, or the biggest asshole in this film.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, he's just he's like William Atherton or some of the other big pricks we've done. Ben Gazara, the big pricks we've done in this movie. This guy doesn't as much credit nor as much screen time, but we see the birthing room, which uh they dust regularly, pretty regularly.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, I was like the door had dust opening a little, but like the metal uh exam table and stuff was pretty in good shape.
SPEAKER_03:Look like mildly shiny. Yeah. We go through the experiment again, this time to the end that Danny Nevito's like, so I'm all the crap, like I'm all the stuff that the body should have rejected and thrown away. And it's a heavy moment.
SPEAKER_08:Just like, yeah, just more baggage for him to carry.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. Arnold talks him through it, which is nice is a nice. It's nice that Arnold grabs the doctor and he's like, if you're lying, I'll be back. Which he's saying how many movies he has to say.
SPEAKER_08:I think it's it, I think it's in his running contract.
SPEAKER_03:In his contract. So I know he did it in Running Man and Last Action Hero, which are on this program. Arnold kind of talks, threatens the doctor and talks Danny through, like, hey, you're different parts of a lot of different people. Like whatever the case is fathers. The people that raise you to a degree, right?
SPEAKER_02:Are and in the sense like you didn't have anyone. No one there. Of course, you're like this. You had to you had to take care of yourself and fend for yourself, but now you've got me. And now we're gonna go find a mother and we'll have a family.
SPEAKER_08:You know, like it was like it was a really sweet moment. Dude, I can't I can't talk about this movie and not try to go and I just fall into like a I love it.
SPEAKER_03:It's it's about chosen family and like the the funkles and the fance, the the foss.
SPEAKER_08:Yes, but it was like it was like a really well, like great. That's exactly it's like I'm here now. You don't have to be alone, you don't have to wall yourself up and and don't listen to that guy. It's I believe it. Don't listen to the person that's hid our mother from us our entire lives and and told like both of us were dead. Like, don't don't take his word for anything. It's nothing.
SPEAKER_03:I believe it. I I think it's well delivered. I think it's a a solid actor doing solid work delivering this, and I feel like he feels real empathy for Danny DeVito and uh both actors like doing really solid shit, and it's like proto fast and the furious, like Paul Walker and Vin Diesel. It's Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny DeVito. Wow, I'd love this. We'll finally be complete. A family.
SPEAKER_05:I said forget about it, could family.
SPEAKER_03:So they go. This is the time they're like, we're gonna meet mom. She's alive, she's around, we're gonna find her, we're gonna get it dialed in, and they go suit shopping.
SPEAKER_08:Yes, this is the iconic scene. And what what amazing suits that they get.
SPEAKER_03:Dude, they're like my are they cream? Are they chiffon?
SPEAKER_08:It's like it's not, it's like an off-chaki brown, creamy egg, but then like the blue, and then teaching them how to walk. You know, you're too stiff, so you gotta you gotta loosen up like like music.
SPEAKER_03:The square sunglasses, does the romance the jacket flip glasses, yes. Schwarzenegger flipping that jacket over Danny DeVito's head is physical comedy gold.
SPEAKER_08:Also, the um we we skipped over it, but the nuked dinners and them oh yeah um how setting their and setting their table.
SPEAKER_10:Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_08:They're all doing identical movements for that. And I was like, I like nuked food. And I was like, no, you don't.
SPEAKER_03:No one no, you don't. You just you think you like it because suddenly it's hot. Uh-huh. So you're just mystified by it. I also I I feel like this is a preamble. It's like the penguin and Mr. Freeze walking together. We're like Mr. Freeze is like, do I look cool? And then the penguin is like, Mr. Ice.
SPEAKER_05:My condition is let me cold to your compliments. I'm too altruist.
SPEAKER_08:The ice age. But now they've got these matching suits, and then they're very top siders, the whole deal. And then now we're in the motel, and it tonight is your night, bro. It's your night, bro. Like the tonight is your night, bro. And this goes on for a while. This is one of those moments where I think, okay, this is where Schwarzenegger was probably stoned because there's a while of like hey, he's just repeating that line. It it felt like in the script, it's like, and Danny Vero says that uh that character says, tonight's your night, bro, and he didn't get his line back. Like, no one said their next line, so he's like, I'm just gonna just gonna keep going. Tonight is your night, bro, and he keeps and he yanks himself and then we then then swords and talks. I was like, ah, I was it was just I got a little bit of pause, but like, there was that was a very long time of just like letting that happen.
SPEAKER_03:I would be interested to watch just how long that clump is because I'm sure it feels longer than it is, uh-huh. But also, it is so sweet. It's one of the moments there aren't a lot of them. He's so nervous, but and he's Arnold's super nervous, and Danny DeVito's like, Oh, I really want you to get laid. Like, it's so weird that the thing that makes him redeemable is how bad he wants his brother to have sex.
SPEAKER_08:And they both have these moments of being the older brother, you know. Oh, yeah, yeah. Like we've got sort of like talking to Vino, like, you're not, don't listen to this guy. And like, you this is why this, and like you don't have to be that anymore. I'm here. Yeah, books are Street Smart. Yeah, it's a big brother thing. And this is also the same thing. I was like, You've never been on a date before. Oh, well, let me show you. Like, I'm like, what are you afraid of? I was like, Oh, we're going dancing. It's like, oh yeah, oh, you don't know how to dance? All right, let's dance.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, I I really like the way it sets up. That's where it feels super, super natural. Oh, what's that smell? It must be a ghost in here. The it sets up them dancing, DeVito dancing with Schwarzenegger, going to the country western bar and dancing. That feels natural and charming. And then all of a sudden the claims show up, and you're like, God damn it, that doesn't shouldn't Webster have fucking killed you already. How are they back again? And how do they find them? And what the yeah, nice of your boss to tell us where you were. It's like so it's so fired. Yeah, yeah. Also, we're fired. The way Kelsey Kelly, Kelsey, Kelly Preston says that also we're fired. It's kind of funny, yeah.
SPEAKER_08:And then it seems like, oh, we're getting to like a climactic moment in a way like, oh, shit's gonna go down. Right. Because I didn't remember what happened next. And it was like, oh no. And then more cousins come out. I was like, uh oh. It's really coming to a head. And like, uh, it's gonna just gonna be like a big scene outside. It's like, nope, nope. He's like, oh, the second rule of uh that's when we get our second rule. The crisis situation. Yeah, crisis situation. And uh too soon.
SPEAKER_07:Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_08:You're bluffing, you gotta call the bluff. And he's like, No, I'm not bluffing. That's when the other cousins come out, like take him outside and kill him. And then Carlos like, oh, it's not a bluff, and then he just jumps up and kicks them in the face and smashes the two other cousins together.
SPEAKER_03:Does a scissor kick and then pulls them together. It's like a three-stop just. Oh, he's talking funny again. Oh, jeez. And Danny DeVito like beats up the other one, and it's kind of you're expecting this big thing, and it's kicks him in the nards. Is that right? Yeah, I think so. It turns into like what feels like mostly a fairly real world world fight. It's very short, and then it's over, and they leave. And everybody's fine with it.
SPEAKER_08:Everybody cheers, everyone's fine. There's unconscious people on the floor, and all the dancers come back out and just dance around the three unconscious bodies.
SPEAKER_03:It's so bizarre because Jeff Beck's playing.
SPEAKER_08:And and like there's there's one of them that's right right next to the the one that had like the the um the neck brace and like the dance is like just like right over his body and doing like this move. I'm like, what is what is happening?
SPEAKER_03:You are gonna try to- What is this extra? Do you assume they just got trampled to death? Oh, after that, yeah. There has been a moido. By the way, it must have been super crowded. For that is Jeff Beck playing the guitar on stage for that scene. It's like, I guess they got lucky.
SPEAKER_08:That was a nice like the dance was also a nice bonding moment with the brothers, yeah, and also uh taking those relationships to the next level. Yeah. Like, ah, there, and like, and then the synchronized movements and everything.
SPEAKER_03:And then the talk in the bathroom, the flushing at the same time.
SPEAKER_08:And then twirling them out, and and then they come to then the brothers come together and waltz back to their uh dance partners and stuff. It's like, ah, you know, like this is what they did, this is what they practiced in the room.
SPEAKER_03:It's it's so visually charming, and the the way they move in synchronicity, and like you were saying, that how they have those talks where the dynamic changes. Yeah, they're grabbing the girls' asses. But then they make sure to show the child like excitement. Oh, that's good. And then the sleeping arrangements tonight is your bad bro. Because it was on the request line, it had to come back. It sticks in your head, right? It's been in my head all morning. So they meet their mom? We're not sure until the end.
SPEAKER_08:But we also, you know, we have the sleeping moment. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. Like Danny V leaves, and then and then the other sister comes, she's like, Oh, I can't, I can't sleep.
SPEAKER_03:Kelly Preston comes after. There's a camera angle of her booty sticking out here.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah. So she takes a bed, he sleeps on the floor, because he always sleeps on the floor. EG. And then like he's not getting the signals. Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Oh, darn. She's like, what teach you?
SPEAKER_08:The bed is too lumpy. Can I sit? Can I come down here with you?
SPEAKER_03:And then I guess it's like he's much lumpier, by the way. Yeah.
SPEAKER_08:Just so you know. But then, yeah, what do we do now? And it's like, let's find out. Like, cool.
SPEAKER_03:Cool. Okay, we fucked. Do you want to meet my mom? And then the cigarette.
SPEAKER_08:The cigarette. Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_03:This is the other moment of like, and then his just like, yeah.
SPEAKER_08:I was like, that was another one. I was like, oh, he I think he had a line and he just forgot it.
SPEAKER_03:Who knows? Yeah. Maybe that was the weed lace. We're just like, this way. Smoke my stogie however I want. So they meet the mom at the artist retreat. Well, and as far as they know, they did not.
unknown:Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:And they reveal it at the end of the scene. Like, we're not ruining anything. They walk through the artist retreat. Oh, you're after an asshole gatekeeper. Like they met one of the real dads. Earlier, yeah. Yeah, who's one of the buff guys who helped them along to find the mom. Daddy. Yeah, daddy. Yeah, kind of one of them. That guy's great. Like a lot of the people with the smaller roles in this movie. That was that was a good one. Yeah, yeah. Like the secretary's really good. It's a small role, but she does really well with it. So mom lies, and basically everyone has lied to everybody except like Julius.
unknown:Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:He's speaking from an honest place always.
SPEAKER_08:And the mom doesn't believe it. They brought up throughout the film was like the people that knew that the mom is still alive was that she gave birth and the child didn't survive. Yeah. And that she never was able to let go of that.
SPEAKER_03:And especially didn't know there were two. Yeah.
SPEAKER_08:But she always she never could get rid of over it. And so then, and that was the whole reason why he said she lied. He's like, Where are your twins? It's like, you motherfuckers trying to get this land will say anything. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:She thinks they're real estate developers. Yeah, trying to basically the thing. Like trying to negotiate. And that's that's the thing about this movie is uh I think it's trying to tell us so much, like our chosen family, our you know, mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, whatever, uh, friends, cousins, all those things, like just what a twisted web, like a lot of this stuff is, and like what a web of lies, and for why. And of course, it's not stuff like by the way, like you gave twin birth to twins, one is a genius, one is Danny Novito. Like, sorry. Like, but the movie doesn't go into the any of that. Vincent, this isn't my mom. Oh my god, and just fucking loses it. He ditches everybody. This is the thing, like, how do you come back from that? How do how is he forgiven? He left Marnie.
SPEAKER_08:He burned every bridge, everybody.
SPEAKER_03:He leaves them in New Mexico, drives off in the stolen Cadillac with the jet engine, and it's the beetroot trap. Like where beatroot's like, yeah, come and meet me, but Webster is there because he's been tailing everybody the whole time. You know, and the claims are hot on the trail, right? They gotta be.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:Because we're gonna see them again, right?
SPEAKER_08:We don't. No. We don't see them again. Nope. They got knocked out and trampled by the uh all the guests have been stomped to death by the roadhouse at the roadhouse.
SPEAKER_03:So it plays uh the runner-up for best song ever, Brother to Brother, which is pretty great. And Vince delivers the engine to Beatroot, and they just pay him. They they threaten him. It feels kind of threatening with the gun, and they're just like, Yeah, here's your five million dollars, Vincent, for delivering the engine. You negotiated well. I know it seems like they're gonna kill him.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, and like it seems really weird. It's like it's just also they also like make sure to like neg him down. Like, also, just you know, like, yeah, you really you really are just a car stealer, aren't you? You just you have no idea. I was like, and then like and then the honesty of like Andy Villages, like, yeah, yeah, I am you know, just like yeah, it's like I'm not armed, but like, yeah, you're right, I'm I'm a piece of trash, nobody.
SPEAKER_03:Do you feel like they're like you lucky son of a bitch?
SPEAKER_08:Like a bit, but they're also like they're putting him down, like you're just a nobody. And then you see him truly fully say it's like, yeah, I am, I'm a nobody. I feel like they thought he was lucky. Like you've made it that like I guess a little bit, but there's I felt like there's a bit of like it was it was, I think it was like a half and half because that I mean there was that one particular neg at him that that like when he had to answer again, like, yeah, no, I'm I I just I'm just a I'm just a scar thief. I'm not interesting or you know, and which is just great for that moment because he's already as downtrodden as he could be. Well, you know, he just burned all the bridges, he's alone again. And so it's just like which he's chosen, yeah. And but he had that like moment of like honesty of it's like agreeing, it's what it kind of felt like, but then also, yeah, it's like, oh great. It's like it's your lucky frickin' day.
SPEAKER_03:I think it it immediately earns that moment, like you said, where Danny DeVito is finally honest, somebody well above his status puts him in his place, he agrees, the people above his status leave are immediately killed.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, and Danny is celebrating because he's got five million bucks. Yep. Oh, I just want to back check really quickly. Some more twin sense stuff was oh yeah, yeah. Arnold flies into like Houston, uh, wherever yeah, and uh and is like looking for him and like feels like the burn on the hand, or like screen, he's like scratching the hand, he feels that, and they're doing like similar things, and he's sensing him on uh and then steals a car, you know.
SPEAKER_03:So he's doing learned from his brother, yeah, exactly.
SPEAKER_08:So older brother lessons. So like he's searching for him and is gonna we all know he's gonna find him.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, and and that's what happens is like there's this underground chase scene thing that happens between Webster, who is doing like long-range stuff with a shotgun, and Danny DeVito scuffling around. He just running and running and running with the smallest steps. Oh, yeah. He's scuffling, yeah. He's scuffling and shuffling, and Arnold shows up at random.
SPEAKER_08:Well, because he's like, finally I've got like the clear.
SPEAKER_03:He's getting out, and he's gonna get away. And that that underground stuff, as we were talking about, the just like the mild action stuff with the motorcycle. The underground stuff with the lighting and some of the pushes that are happening and the dollies and the lens pulls, yeah. Yeah, it's nice, it's got like a little bit of style there, which like I enjoy. When this movie's really trying to move, it does have a little stylistic flair to it. Yeah, there's some speed ramps and stuff that happen. And then uh and then he But here's Arnold out of nowhere.
SPEAKER_08:He's got his I his sights are on DeVito, and Arnold's there just in time with his silver briefcase and just chucks it at him and makes a miss. And DeVito comes back like, uh shit, I could have got out. Well then he yeah, he's like, he keeps running, and then he's a Miami or whatever he says. Yeah, he's like, he hears the voice, he's like, shit. Yeah, he's like, no, and he tries to fight it, and he's like, No, I can't. And like, that's my brother, and he goes back like also lovely moment.
SPEAKER_03:And yeah, and it's like I was yeah, dude, it's the third, the third rule thing that happens where they're like the third rule in the crisis situation, and apparently Webster's so they open the brief. What is it? What is it case?
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, and like we gave you the money, you're gonna kill us anyways.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's so enthralled by whatever the third rule might be that they're like so slow, but there's no like the whole time I lied, I was like, ah, there's a lever there.
SPEAKER_08:That's the third rule. I get it, but like there's no signaling to the lever. They're just looking at each other. I was like, okay, I guess it's twin sensing.
SPEAKER_03:They're intuiting, yeah. They're twin sensing. So I don't know. It's it's pretty fucking corny and it makes no sense, but it drops that insane chain, which is pretty cool.
SPEAKER_08:So good. And it's like nine feet high, eight feet high. And they they let you just they let you just soak that up for a bit of just watching them watch the chain, you watching the chain. Yeah, and the sound effects and and then next thing is just a white cut and the chain is the pile is so much bigger than our expect it to be.
SPEAKER_03:Arnold's like a 6162. Ridiculous pile of chains. And we cut back now to the mom, who we know is the mom because they told us earlier, and we have to wrap that up. We never saw the claims again because they got they got stampeded. They got bigger.
SPEAKER_08:The Billy's making return the money.
SPEAKER_03:Right. Julius is like, you gotta return the five, you gotta return the money, you gotta return all of it. But they show up in USL, USA today, and it's proven that they're twins and they're this big national story, and they return this missing engine piece, right? This corporate espionage shit, and the mom shows up at the evil doctors and punches him in the face. Again, this guy's the worst fucking security guards, I swear to God.
SPEAKER_08:So satisfying though.
SPEAKER_03:The mom kicks the door 16 feet, yeah, picks him up with one hand, just chucks him out the window, and it's now like the biggest.
SPEAKER_04:I'm tearing the hole apart. Yeah. What happened to me?
SPEAKER_08:But then, yeah, they're they're now we've seen them and they're like, they're in a big old expensive job. Office.
SPEAKER_03:Nothing there.
SPEAKER_08:We've got the secretary back. They their business is something.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. He gets Linda back, he he does this big grain gesture, Danny DeVito does it.
SPEAKER_08:And then the the yeah, and the the sec oh sorry, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03:He does do the gives her all the flowers, but they they start the Benedict Corporation.
SPEAKER_08:Somehow breaks and enters in in like five seconds flips around the back side.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, yeah. Breaks into the back side. Nobody knows how he did it. But there he is. So now they're they have the Benedict Corporation, which is like the Rand Corporation, but smarter.
SPEAKER_08:Yes. There you go.
SPEAKER_03:And uh they're tallying everything up, and with the$50,000 reward, how much do they have left? Their office is swanky, they're wearing nice shirts with cuff links.
SPEAKER_08:They've paid off all their loans and debts, and they still have sixteen thousand dollars a good amount of money.
SPEAKER_03:And it's it's told to us pretty much that Danny Devado DeVito was somehow able to take a million dollars of that cash and put it.
SPEAKER_08:Oh, the four million dollars. That's right. It's like, oh yeah, you made me return the four million dollars. And then I can't tell. Do you think Julius knows about the the other? Like, did they agree? I don't think Julius knows. Because I thought, I think I thought he heard that it was five million earlier.
SPEAKER_03:He but maybe he did. Yeah, the movie has something, like, who knows?
SPEAKER_08:It's just like is he just oblivious, or is he like, I yes, return the movie? Sure, we can take a little bit.
SPEAKER_03:I don't think he ever told anybody the amount. He didn't tell the girls a lot, does he? Well, he does when he renegotiates it. Five million dollars, five million dollars. Which I like that scene a lot. Five million dollars ain't enough for you. I like the guy who plays Beat Root. Here's the thing though, I would rather they had all five million dollars because I want Julius to have that money to do good with it. That other four million dollars went back to some company or went to the government. No. Yeah, no, thank you. It's a bit far-fetched. The whole movie's a bit far fetched. But then the mom something did. It's about Danny DeVito and Al Schwarzenegger being twins. I don't know if you know this.
SPEAKER_02:Oh, yeah. I know I I thought that was very believable.
SPEAKER_03:Is that far fetched to you? The twin sense was great. Yeah. Mom comes like, mommy, and then they all hug together and Mama. Yeah. Danny DeVito there, the moment before he says Mama, like it was very sweet. There's some actors here. There's some breakfast for sure.
SPEAKER_08:She's like, I didn't know.
SPEAKER_03:I didn't know, I'm sorry. Yeah. And it was like, uh It's a very sweet ending. So a lot of stuff doesn't get wrapped up, including as we were saying, like, did the claims just get trampled to death? Can we see the sequence? Is there a murder podcast about what happened to the claims? Can we get that?
SPEAKER_08:And now we jump in time to uh what's it? It's old LA Zoo. A year later or something? It's a carousel there. Yeah. They used to be there, or maybe it's still there. Is it at a park or a carnival or something? I've been there. I know that. I was like, I recognize this. I don't think it's there anymore. And the doctor from the island is there, and and the mom is there, and they and the the sisters and the br and the twins.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, the twins have had twins and the twins and the twins.
SPEAKER_08:And then yeah, you see that shot of them just walking together like before, but then they zoom out and they both have uh strollers with twins in them, and and that sets up the uh the Jake Johnson and uh Troy Day and Will Farrell and John C. Riley uh twin sequel. I really after you know the alternate version of Junior. Right, right, right.
SPEAKER_03:The way to go, but I just really wanna know what happened. I just wanna espe I would want to know what happened in the triplets. Did you know your uncle men faucets and that and that on that? What if it were triplets with your idea? Like Eddie Murphy was the third, and then the sons were, I don't know, Michael B. Jordan and Yahya.
SPEAKER_08:So we'd have to do triplets, and then we could do the twin triplets six tubits. Sick tup blitz. Oct octagon. Because then we've got the three brothers with the with the and the the bun with then six set six kids, two three pairs of twins that then are the infinity stones.
SPEAKER_03:We're at the end of this movie. We have spoken about this movie at Nazi. This has been going we've been recording for a while. Uh there's so much shit I'm sure we miss in this movie. There's so many goddamn fucking storylines. We did the very best that we could. Burris, should it be you, should it be I?
SPEAKER_08:Um I was just gonna you should stop reading my twins in modern cannot buy some.
SPEAKER_03:We're always finishing each other's sandwiches. We've both seen that a lot, apparently. Yeah. Okay. We just we watch twins. Uh I will tell you, I don't think I'm gonna move off the three with the with the three milkshakes with the heart. I don't I don't want to move off it. I don't think there's any I know I think I know the flaws of this movie intimately. And they don't bother again. I think I'm gonna start using this for a barometer. I would show twins to a child, my child, a child, fictitio or real, before I'd show them fucking Goodburger. I'm again like I'd show Terminator 2 to a kid before I'd show them Goodburger, but I just I think the movie is mostly harmless, and I think it can start, especially depending on how much you want to parent or funkal or font or whatever it might be, funk. Uh font, font? Oh no, don't do that. But like it just depends on a conversation you want to have with a with with a kid for the age appropriate of the rating. I guess I'm obsessed with that.
SPEAKER_08:And for this movie, like there are some very lovely like topics broached, and and like like the conversation with Arnold and DeVito, like don't listen to him. Like, it was because of you were raised alone, and of course you ended up this way. You didn't have you know a bunch of scientists taking care of you on an island, giving you a book story. Are you still at the three and a half? You know, I like the three and a heart. I do like because it is. It's like it that's I was like the half. It's like it's endearing. Like there's something about it that's like, ah, like it had some really good moments, even though like it's just a it's a roller coaster of things happening. So I think I'll go with like a three.
SPEAKER_03:So you're coming down, but you're staying the same because the the half is becoming the heart.
SPEAKER_08:It's yeah, it was that's a better way of describing it, I guess.
SPEAKER_03:How many wheelies is it? As we're trying to figure out math as we do on this program. How many wheelies are we doing?
SPEAKER_08:I think how many wheels is it? It's well three, three separate cars. How much do I have to learn? It's three, it's a it's a set of triplet cars all on two wheels.
SPEAKER_06:There's so much learning. Learning is so fun. See my movie kindergarten cop. I teach you. My mother was a teacher, my father was a teacher.
SPEAKER_08:At least they didn't put the strollers on wheelies. They didn't do anything with them.
SPEAKER_03:Jingle in all the way, they would be okay. So you threes and hearts. Three milkshakes and a heart, three wheelshakes.
SPEAKER_08:You know, you gotta just take your like this was made in the 80s, you gotta go into it with that. And then also know, like, it's just gonna be it's it's a movie called Twins starring Danny DeVito and Arnold Schwartz.
SPEAKER_03:You know exactly what it is.
SPEAKER_08:So don't be going in as you think.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. Don't go in with high expectations and then expect your high expectation to be blown the fuck up. Away by the amount of storylines and what they infer.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, don't go for like the storytelling, but go for like the heart and the comedy.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, it's charming. And open yourself up if you haven't yet. Oh boy, be careful. If you haven't yet, to comedic actor Schwarzenegger. Yeah, it's fun. Right? You understand why he was in Batman and Robin? Because he's the iceman. He's the ice. So cool. Everybody chill.
SPEAKER_06:I let you bite my nose off if you want. He's so sexy.
SPEAKER_03:Our themes on the bookends are Jamie Henwood. What are we doing? And what are we watching? Is Matthew Foskett. Fun facts are Chris Old's and the interstitials are by you know the usual, the normal, the regular. Not that you're non- No, I'm a regular.
SPEAKER_08:I get it.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, well, me too. That's part of the reason why I've got to stop recording. Ben will be back soon before you know it. But Bruce, thank you so much for joining me. This was great. I had a lot of fun. Right? And now you get to listen to this podcast. It's almost certainly longer than the movie.
SPEAKER_08:Yeah, I'm really excited to hear the solo version of this podcast.
SPEAKER_03:We had a good time talking about twins. Go read something. Not about uh reproduction.
SPEAKER_08:You know what? I mean, what read about reproduction or don't read about reproduction, or you know, read about whatever you want, whatever floats your boat.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, that's a good idea. Oh, I guess that's what I'm taking.
SPEAKER_08:You know, how about this? Read something that will let you learn something. Vroom vroom.
SPEAKER_00:Hi everyone, this is JJ, the co-founder of Good Pods. If you haven't heard of it yet, Good Pods is like Goodreads or Instagram, but for podcasts. It's new, it's social, it's different, and it's growing really fast. There are more than two million podcasts, and we know that it is impossible to figure out what to listen to. On Good Pods, you follow your friends and podcasters to see what they like. That is the number one way to discover new shows and episodes. You can find Good Pods on the web or download the app. Happy listening.
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