A Flash Of My Smile

Come and listen while Host Candace Gish interviews a variety of extraordinary women, whom are working to make the world a better place! #DivasThatCareMeredith Ethington is an award-winning writer and author of The Mother Load, a book about the journey through motherhood and mental health. She is also the author of her 2018 debut book, Mom Life: Perfection Pending. She started writing on her popular blog, Perfection Pending and her viral essays have reached millions of struggling parents. She lives in Salt Lake City, UT with her husband, three kids, and muppety dog, Millie. In her loads of spare time, she is studying to become a licensed mental health counselor.https://perfectionpending.net

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Transcript

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It's Divas That Care Radio. Stories, strategies, and ideas to inspire positive change. Welcome to Divas That Care, a network of women committed to making our world a better place for everyone. This is a global movement for women, by women, engaged in a collaborative effort to create a better world for future generations. To find out more about the movement, visit DivasThatCare.com after the show. Right now, though, stay tuned for another jolt of inspiration. Well, hello there

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and welcome back to The Divas That Care. My name is Candice Gish. If this is your very first time tuning in, a huge welcome. The Divas That Care has now been online here for 13 years. We've been listening to it in over 30 countries around the world. It's been just a pleasure to be able to do this and I'm so excited that you've joined us today. I am excited today. I'm going to be interviewing a brand new diva in our program. She is amazing. She actually submitted her story to an anthology that we just released, Our Mothers, Our Daughters, and I'm Meredith Eppington, welcome to the Divas That Care. Thank you. Thanks so much for having me. Oh my gosh. I am so excited that we're finally able to do this podcast and have you on the show just so that I can get to know you a little bit better. Yeah, same. Meredith, would you mind doing a quick introduction about yourself? Yeah, sure. So I am a mom of three. I live in Salt Lake City, Utah. I've been writing online since the beginning of time, so since about 2007. So I'm in the years of having teenagers, and so my kids are 16, 14, and 11. And I just kind of wrote about parenting and about motherhood as a way to kind of with the challenges of parenting myself, but also to help women feel less alone. So that's kind of been my mission all these years. And it's been such a fulfilling and wonderful thing to be able to do what I love. I love that. And I'm a mother of teenagers too, so I totally get that. And the things that we go through, isn't it awesome that if you're able to have that ability to write and share that, it does really support other people out there that are probably looking for something to learn about? Yeah, I think I started out hoping to help other moms, but realized very quickly that it helped me as well. It helped me feel less alone. It helped me feel like I could cope with whatever was going on in my life by writing about it and then kind of letting it go. So it's really been a beautiful thing in my life. I love it. You're doing an online journaling. I totally am. Yeah, for sure. That is fantastic. So, Meredith, can you tell us a little bit why you decided to submit your story to the Divas That Cares, our mothers, our daughters, and tell us a little bit about what your story is about. So, I think I really just struggled from day one being a mom, and my oldest is a girl, and so being a daughter myself to my own mother is And then also having a daughter myself has kind of created this, I don't know, internal conflict sometimes with me. Growing up, I didn't always have the best relationship with my mom. And so when I went into the parenting journey, I really wanted to have a good relationship with my own daughter. And my essay that I submitted is kind of about that, about how I reflected a lot on how who I was as a daughter in my relationship with my own mother and put so much pressure on myself that whatever hiccups my own daughter and I might have, that that was kind of a mirroring of my own relationship with my mom. And then going through the process of realizing that my daughter was her own unique person and she's not me and she's going to approach the world in her own unique way. And just like I'm not– just like my mom in the way I parent her. So it's kind of just this processing through of that conflict. I think so often the mom and daughter relationship is sometimes a little bit difficult. And I like the concept of the book to be able to kind of talk about the relationship between mothers and daughters. And so it turned into something really great to be able to be a part of it. Oh, well, we thank you so much for being a part of it. We truly are honored. Oh, thanks. And you know what I like about it, too, is that your essay, your chapter, is in the inner self part of it. And I really thought that it worked out really well for it to be in there because it's that internal reflection that we're doing is to try to figure those things out. Yeah, I'm kind of really one of those people that is probably too... analytical and to internally focus sometimes on all my flaws and my imperfections. That's kind of why I started writing because I felt so overwhelmed by motherhood in the beginning and just wanting to do it right and wanting to do it perfectly. And so my internal conflict has been the biggest challenge in my parenting journey. To be honest, it hasn't been the pressures from other people. It's been the pressure that I put on myself. And so through my writing, I've always tried to kind of process that and challenge that way of thinking and encourage moms to know that if they feel like they're failing, they're probably not. And we're all doing the best we can. What type of tips can they take out of your essay? I would just say mostly to remember that Thank you so much. Look, I'm certainly not the expert on having a perfect relationship with a teenage daughter. She and I have our own struggles, right, like all moms and daughters do. But I think my biggest tip would be to– Can you continually talk about things, be open and honest in your communication? Because kids are living, and when we make mistakes, if we can talk about those mistakes with our girls, I think that it can only help them as they move forward in their lives if they one day become a parent to kind of give themselves grace to see that modeled in the relationship with their own mother, if that makes sense. It does. I really love that tip. You know, I have four daughters myself and every day it's kind of a new adventure, I always say, and I never know what's going to happen. I take it with a grain of salt and I grin and I always say my motto, just keep swimming. And I think that's why we had started the Divas That Cares because... of what you're saying. And I really think it's great that we're able to share these stories with other women so that they can see that they're not alone. Like everybody goes through different things in their lives and the relationships that we have with either our mothers or with our daughters, they're not perfect, but they are relationships. And I think there's always something that we can learn from them. Absolutely. And I've learned so much from her and just being a mom to a girl in general, I think because I am a woman, it puts, kind of this added pressure to it. You want to teach them everything you know, and you want them to not make the same mistakes you made, but in reality, they're going to be themselves, and that's a good thing, and they're going to teach us as much as we teach them. I love it. So tell me, Meredith, what is next with you? Well, gosh, I have a book of my own that just released last month called The Motherload, And that's about parenting and mental health. I write a lot about my own struggles with anxiety and depression through my parenting journey. And it's a lot about that, but also about kind of the mental load that all moms carry. So it's a great book for any mom that feels like she's maybe struggling with that mental load or her own mental health. And then I'm currently in graduate school, which makes me very, very busy. Oh, wow. Yeah, I went back to school in my mid-40s, and honestly, it's been a great experience. I'm getting my master's in clinical mental health counseling, and I'm just loving it so far. And again, back to that mental health aspect, that's something that I'm really passionate about. Yeah, I hope to be able to tie the two together, you know, continue to be in the writing space, but also become a therapist. So that's my next thing, I guess. I think it's fantastic. I just want to do a quick plug. Where can they go and check out your books and follow you? Yeah, so my blog is perfectionpending.net. And that has links to both of my books there, or they are both on Amazon. I do have two books. I have one called Mom Life, which was released in 2018, and then I have The Motherload, which was just released last month. They're both available on Amazon or barnesandfernal.com, or if you just go to my website, perfectionpizzy.net, you should be able to find them there. Thank you so much. I hope that you can come back on the show again, Meredith. I just think there's so many things that we can chat about and everything that you're doing, and I'd love to have a more in-depth conversation. Yeah, for sure. Let's do it. Definitely. Thank you so much for chatting about your chapter today. And what is the name of your chapter? Oh, my gosh. I don't remember. That's okay. A Flash of My Smile. Oh, that's right. That's right. Oh, my gosh. I'm so sorry. I don't have a book right here in front of me either. I write too many things, obviously. That is perfect. That's what we love to hear. And I want our listeners to go and check out everything that you're doing. And so just to let our listeners know, I will be posting your information too, Meredith, because I really love what you're doing out there. And that way they can follow you on all your social media. That's amazing. Thank you so much. You're welcome. And to all of our listeners, thank you so much for tuning in today. I know our program is very short. We're doing these special shows just to showcase our mothers, our daughters, and all these amazing contributors that have been a part of this anthology. So we're so excited that Meredith was our guest today. Her chapter, A Flash of My Smile, is available now. And we are so fortunate to announce that we made the number one bestseller in literary essays. So thank you so much for all of you that have been a part of this amazing journey. You can pick up this book, actually, at anywhere that you buy a book, Barnes& Noble, Chapters, Amazon, and Absolute Love Publishing. So thank you again, Meredith. Thank you to all of our listeners. And please

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remember to do something kind today. Until next time, everyone. Thanks for listening. This show was brought to you by Divas That Care. Connect with us on Facebook, on Instagram, and of course, on divasthatcare.com, where you can subscribe to our newsletter so you don't miss a thing.