Breaking The Burnout Cycle
Are you a female entrepreneur who is currently spinning your wheels, doing all the right things, yet continuing to find yourself hitting an invisible wall that is keeping you from the success, fulfillment, freedom, & happiness you want?
You’ve read the books. Taken the courses. Implemented the strategies. You know the “how to”...but somehow they either don’t work for you when you apply them OR you can’t get yourself to stay consistent with them to get them to work for you.
And because of that there is a part of you that wonders deep down
“Why is this working for everyone else but me?”
“Maybe I’m doing something wrong? What am I missing?”
“Am I not doing enough?”
…or worse - “Is something wrong with me?”
And because you’ve only learned one way to achieve success, you now find yourself believing that the only way to achieve your goals is to work even harder. To push and push and push, like nothing else matters, not your health, not your family, not your life.
Here’s the truth: You’re not broken. You’re just burnt out from doing success the way you were taught — the hustle-harder, push-through, ignore-your-needs kind of way.
Breaking the Burnout Cycle is the podcast that finally speaks to you. Hosted by Dr. Reana Mulcahy, subconscious reprogramming coach and former hustle-addict turned aligned success mentor, this show is your permission slip to stop over-functioning, start honoring your truth, and finally create the next level of success from a place of alignment, not exhaustion.
Dr. Reana over the past 4 years has been high achievers, like yourself, break free from the burnout cycle by teaching brain-based tools, rooted in neuroscience and neuropsychology, to help you identify, understand, and break free from subconscious habits that are keeping you from the success, fulfillment, and freedom you crave.
Each week, we dive into subconscious mindset work, nervous system healing, and the invisible beliefs that keep high achievers stuck in survival mode — even when they look “successful” on the outside. You'll hear solo episodes, client breakthroughs, and expert conversations designed to help you rewire your beliefs, reclaim your energy, and rise into the results, relationships, and reality you know you’re meant for.
It’s time to stop chasing success that costs you your peace. It’s time to break the burnout cycle — for good.
Subscribe now and let’s rewrite the rules of success, together.
Breaking The Burnout Cycle
Five Mistakes High Achieving Women Make To Try To Regain Their Energy
Feeling tired but unable to switch off? We dig into why smart, driven women keep circling burnout even after vacations, stricter routines, and “better boundaries.” The problem isn’t your willpower. It’s the hidden operating system—your subconscious identity—that keeps pulling you back into overgiving, people-pleasing, and nonstop productivity.
We start by naming the six mistakes that quietly drain energy: chasing perfect work-life balance, banking on me time and vacations to fix everything, setting boundaries that still consume mental space, trying to care less, forcing meditation that spikes anxiety, and believing more time will finally make it all click. Each seems sensible. Yet each backfires when your identity still says, “I’m the reliable one,” “I never drop the ball,” or “I’m only valuable when I do more.”
From there, we shift to what actually works. Using a brain-based approach, we show how to update the “I am” statements that steer your choices under stress. Drawing on the outcomes–processes–identity model popularized by James Clear, we explain why change rarely sticks when it starts at the surface. You’ll learn how to create bridge beliefs your nervous system can accept, pair them with small proofs, and reduce the anxiety that typically follows saying no, resting, or leaving work at work. The result isn’t cliche balance—it’s sustainable energy, boundaries with mental peace, and care that doesn’t cost you your health.
If you’re done with quick fixes and ready to change the code that runs your day, this conversation will meet you where you are and guide you forward. Subscribe, share with a friend who needs this, and leave a review to tell us which mistake you’re retiring first.
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Discover more ways I can support you in breaking the burnout cycle. Visit my website.
If you are a high achieving woman who is exhausted, then chances are you're exhausted to the point that you sometimes don't even recognize yourself. And if this is you, then today's episode is for you because I am going over five of the biggest mistakes that most high achievers make when they try to regain their energy and how it's actually costing you. That's all coming up today on today's episode. So stay tuned. Hi, I'm Dr. Rihanna Mulkhee, and after burning out not just once, but twice, I've uncovered that burnout becomes a never-ending loop unless you uncover the subconscious beliefs at the root of it all. Each week, I'm bringing you brain-based tools and strategies that will help you to identify and rewire subconscious blocks, keeping you from the success, happiness, and freedom that you really want. This is Breaking the Burnout Cycle Podcast. Today we're covering the top five mistakes that I see most burnt out high achievers make as a way to try to regain their energy and break free from that cycle of burnout or that cycle and feeling of exhaustion. And you know, if you are there or you've ever been there, then you most likely know what that level of exhaustion feels like. Like it stops being a physical lack of sleep type of tired, right? Because let's be honest, when you are at this level, chances are even though you're dead tired, you most likely find yourself struggling to even fall asleep or stay asleep still. And so it almost like evolves to this mind, body, spirit, emotional level of exhaustion, where you now are starting to have these like uh red flags almost of brain fog, or you're starting to notice that your fuse is a lot shorter, right? Like you're snapping at your kids or your spouse almost every week, um, or even just like the things that used to bring you joy now just feel like a chore. Like everything just sounds eh, it sounds meh for lack of a better term, right? And so, like, if you are there or you've ever been there, then you know how um how pervasive this level of exhaustion is and how it bleeds into kind of every facet of life, right? Your family life, your work life, uh things get harder to push yourself. And to be honest, after years of probably pushing through some of the early signs of this, you're probably at a point where you're just like, I don't know how much longer I can keep this up. And if this is you, then most likely you've done maybe one or maybe all of the five mistakes that I'm about to share uh on today's episode to try to fix that, right? And I share this because honestly, it would be a disservice if I don't show you the reasons why those things aren't working to fix your lack of energy problem, your burnout problem. Because what I see time and time again is that by the time women come to work with me in our coaching program to heal from this level of exhaustion, is that they share with me all of the things that they've tried to fix the problem, to regain their energy, to start feeling like themselves again. And they share with me just this level of like belief almost like something's wrong with them, like they haven't, they're the only ones who haven't been able to figure it out, right? They they tell me all the things that they've done to try to fix the problem, and then they follow that up with a statement that tells me this because they'll tell me things like Rihanna, I've done this, this, this, and this, and yet I'm still, you know, I'm still in that level of burnout, that level of exhaustion. And so I don't know what I'm doing wrong. So it's like they start to look at themselves as like something's wrong with me, I'm flawed, and then the danger in that is that they then start to believe that, right? They start to believe that something is wrong with them, and therefore that is why they're not worthy, or that is why they're unlovable, or that is why, you know, whatever conclusions they draw from that. And so this is why today's episode is going to be so powerful because chances are you can maybe relate with what I've just shared, where maybe you've tried, you know, the retreats or the spa days or vacations or more me time or whatever it is that you've tried, right? And it didn't work for you, and maybe you can relate with that where you're starting to wonder what is it that I'm missing? What am I doing wrong? What is it that I haven't figured out that it seems like everyone else has figured out? Because on social media, right, everyone looks like their life is put together, they're not going through these types of things, or when you are out in public and you ask people how they're doing, right? Everyone has a smile on everyone, looks like everything's fine. When the reality is, I I'm willing to bet 90% of those people are equally exhausted, equally burnt out, and yet they're just not at that point where they're willing to admit that. And and so if there is anything that I hope you get from today's episode, it's first off to know that you're not alone, and it's second off to put the hammer down, right? Like there is nothing wrong with you, and you're not doing anything wrong if you've tried uh interventions or you've tried things to try to get your energy back and it didn't work for you. Okay, because today I'm about to show you why all of those things that you might have tried haven't worked, and none of those are your fault. Okay, so let's dive in. The first mistake that I see most high-achieving women try to make uh or try to do to fix their energy problem is achieving work-life balance. And how many of you have heard about work-life balance, right? Like, oh, you just need more work-life balance to fix your exhaustion, to fix your burnout. Um, yeah, and how many people have actually achieved that? See, this work-life balance, why I have such an issue with it is because if you think about the word balance, it creates almost like a tipping scale, you know, like those old-fashioned weighted scales where you put one item on the left side and then you put weights on the right side to try to even the scales? Well, that is kind of what the term balance implies. It implies that there's a perfect balance, a perfect, like equal distribution between work and life. And let's be real, how often is that a reality? And what I've seen time and time again of why this actually causes more harm than good, is I see it create so much pressure and actually a source of shame for women when they can't achieve this perfect balance because life is not perfect, right? There's gonna be times where the kiddos get sick and then uh excuse my French, but shit hits the fan, and then it's like now work schedules behind, and then you gotta postpone or push dates back for your launch, and that's just the nature and the reality of life. But when we have this idea that there should be this perfect balance, then it really creates a lot of pressure that if it doesn't look the way we were told it should look, then that's the reason why we're burnt out, and therefore we start going back into the blame game. And so this is one of the biggest issues that I have with work-life balance, and it tends to be a lot of source of stress and then shame and guilt when women are finding themselves unable to strike that balance, okay. Mistake number two that I see all the time is women scheduling in more me time or scheduling in more vacations, right? And then they come back only to find yourself just as drained as before, um, or sometimes more drained than before. There's a reason why we hear the cliche all the time that I need a vacation from my vacation, right? Like if taking time off and having more me time was going to be the solution, then you should be coming back, or you would have been coming back feeling more energized, and yet that's not the case. So why is that? Okay, mistake number three that I see is setting boundaries. Okay, and you might be thinking, like, what, but setting boundaries is great because I'm protecting my time, I'm protecting my energy. The problem with that, though, is that here's what actually happens. Okay, you set the boundary, and then all of a sudden, you find yourself sliding back into the old patterns, or you set the boundary, and then even though you uphold the boundary, you can't concentrate on anything else because it is eating up all of your attention as you expend so much mental and emotional energy ruminating about the situation, right? Ruminating about what it the other person potentially thinks about you, are they upset with you? Um, are you disappointing them? Are you letting them down? And so it's not that boundaries don't work, it's that if all of these other things like sliding back into the old patterns or uh spending all of your energy worrying about people happens, then it's not really doing what it's meant to do, is it? Okay, mistake number four that I see is pretending that you need to care less. Okay, is like this is for all my empaths out there. How many of you have ever said these words? If I just cared less, right? Like when it comes to either patient care or taking care of your clients or caring about the quality of work that you put out there, right, that you stamp your name on, then it's like you always love to go above and beyond. You deeply care about your team, you deeply care about your clients, you deeply care about the quality of work you put out there, and sometimes you even say that it's just a matter of your standards, but is it really right? And how many of you have then said, I would have more energy if I just cared less? Okay, that's mistake number four. Mistake number five is spending more time trying to do meditation and mindfulness. Okay, like we see this all the time. You gotta sit in the silence, you do some yoga to calm the nervous system, um, all of these tactics to try to quiet the mind. But how many of you guys struggle to even sit still? Where the minute that you try to either do meditation or mindfulness, it's like um all of a sudden I have anxiety, right? Like that sitting still gives you more anxiety than if you just stayed busy. Or you maybe do well for like a day, maybe two days, maybe a week, and then all of a sudden it's like rubber hits the road, we've got deadlines, and then you struggle to maintain consistency with keeping that as a regular routine. Okay, I'm actually gonna add a sixth mistake in here as well, and the sixth mistake that I see is the fact that so many people believe that if only they had more time, right? Like, how many times have you maybe uttered the words, God, if I just had more time, then I would be able to be more productive, I would get more done, and then right, with the underlying belief being that then I won't be so stressed, and then I won't be so exhausted. And so those are kind of like the big six mistakes that time and time again I see high achieving woman after high achieving woman come through my doors telling me that they've tried one most times all of all six of these, right? And so it's not to say, first off, that these tactics don't help, they absolutely can help, okay. But where the problem lies is if you are expecting these tactics to be the solution to your exhaustion and your burnout, then I hate to break it to you, but you're going to continue finding yourself disappointed. Like you're gonna find yourself disappointed as you start these, you swear you're gonna do things differently, and then all of a sudden you find yourself stuck in the same patterns, right? Like frustrated that you weren't more disciplined or that you weren't better about taking care of yourself or whatever it is that the tactic the tactics goal was to accomplish when the reality is like none of that is the case at all, and the reason why every single one of these fail is because it is a it isn't a lack of willpower, okay? It's not a lack of willpower, it's because the tactics work, but only as much as you do. And here's what I mean by that. The tactics work as much as the system in which they're operating, right? And what I mean by that is your subconscious mind is the system, okay? The analogy I give is it's like a computer or a phone, even any piece of technology with the latest technology, right? What is Apple always doing? Well, you got an update, you got an update, you got an update, and every single update to the system settings, to the system programming, in theory helps that tech to run better, more efficiently, all of those things. Your subconscious mind is analogous to your iPhone or your computer, right? Where the programming that you have is your subconscious mind. And if you don't update the subconscious mind to match the outcome that you want, then you're always going to find yourself slipping back into these patterns. And I think um there was a book, The Atomic Habits, that I think is a really great book. And I wanted to share that here as well because what James Clear talks about so well is the reason why it's very similar to what we're talking about with your subconscious mind being the operating system that drives your behaviors, right? And what James talks about is that the three layers of behavior change are number one, outcome, number two is processes, and number three is identity. Okay, so what outcome layer of behavior change is, is it's focused on what you get. So it's focused on, you know, let's say losing weight or making more money or having more time and energy. Okay. Number two, the second layer of behavior change is the processes, and that one is what you do. Okay, so that's more action-oriented. It's like you saving money, you setting boundaries, you working out. And then the third layer of behavior change, and I would argue the most important layer of behavior change is the identity piece. And he talks about that being based on what you believe, right? So it's the identities that you uh resonate with. So, like, I am a healthy person. Or, how many of you guys have said this? I am a people pleaser. And what he talks about is that most people will start with the outcome or the processes that they need to do or that they want in order to get what they want, right? And the problem with that is that it doesn't address the identity level, which is your subconscious beliefs, and that's part of identity. So if you are constantly saying, I'm a people pleaser, I am, that phrase I am indicates that you are saying that's a part of your identity. It's essentially saying, This is what I've done, this is what I've always done, this is all I've ever known, and therefore I am, right? And so why is this important? Well, like we talked about with the analogy of the tech, right, of your computer or your phone needing upgraded systems, the same is true when it comes to your behaviors, right? Because as long as you continue to tell yourself that you are a people pleaser, that you are not good with time, that you are not good at setting boundaries, the longer you're going to keep finding yourself self-sabotaging your ability to set those boundaries and uphold them with mental peace, right? The longer you're gonna find yourself constantly putting everyone's needs before your own, the longer you're gonna find yourself um being able to leave work at work. And even though you might want more balance in your life, it's not about what you want. It if your identity is rooted in you being the strong one, you being the person who always figures it out, you being the reliable one, the one who gets things done, you being a hard worker, you always handling things, then the cycle just is going to continue because even if you saying yes when you really want to say no, even if that's not what you want, your actions are always going to match your identity or what you believe your identity is. Because when they don't, so like if your identity is that you're the reliable one, the one who always gets things done for people, well then the minute that you do an action that goes against that identity, then what happens is your brain automatically starts firing and perceiving um this action as a threat. It's like, wait a minute, this is the way we always do it, this is what we know, therefore, you're choosing a risky behavior. I can't predict the outcome because we've never done it that way. And then what happens? Well, that's when you start self-sabotaging yourself, right? You start having that increase in anxiety when you go to say no, you start worrying about what the other person is thinking, replaying the interactions and you setting the boundary and their response to it, right? And it this is your brain literally trying to keep you safe. It's literally telling you this does not match the operating system. And so if you want true lasting change, then it starts with changing at the identity level first. It starts with changing the operating system, the subconscious beliefs that are driving every single one of your decisions and every single one of your actions. Because ultimately, if the identity doesn't change, then the actions don't change and the results don't change. And this is why I see time and time again so many high-achieving women like yourselves out there who are making these uh valiant efforts to regain your energy and still finding yourself on the cusp of burnout. And it's why I'm putting on a free training. It's coming up on October 29th. And if this is you, where you are resonating with everything that I'm talking about here, then come and join us because I am gonna teach you the exact tools to help you step off of the cycle of exhaustion and stress so that you can finally take control of your life again, finally regain your time and your energy because that is what's getting in the way of you showing up the way you want to show up and also experiencing life the way it's meant to be experienced. And so the link is down below. And other than that, I will see you guys next week on another episode. Bye for now.