Hey , welcome to Doing Life with Ken and Tabitha . We are so pumped that you're tuning in to this podcast . It has been designed for people just like you . We wanna do life with you , share our wins , our defeats , our ups and our downs , in hopes that you'll grow closer to God and to the people that you love in your life . Sit back and enjoy today's podcast . Welcome to another edition episode of Doing Life with Ken and Tabitha .
Speaker 2Yes , pumped edition . Episode of Doing Life with Ken and Tabitha . Hope to have you guys with us today . We're so glad you're here today . If you're new to our podcast , thank you for tuning in and we're praying for you . So glad that you can be with us today .
Speaker 1Yeah , no matter where you're tuning in from , matter of fact , can you just take a moment If you're not driving , comment . Let us know what's your name , what city are you tuning in from , what state if you're in the States ? If you're in another nation , what nation are you tuning in from ? Let us know who you are , but also let us know how this has been a blessing to you , if you don't mind . And we started this podcast with one simple goal in mind help you grow closer to God and also closer to the people that God's placed in your life .
Speaker 1We've been married for 25 years and we've been through the ups downs , the ugly , the good and the bad , and we want to take what we've learned over 25 years and pay it forward to other people , and so this is mostly a marriage relationship podcast , but it's also a personal growth podcast and you know , what I've learned is that we have tons of single people that are tuning in , people that are preparing themselves now for marriage , and I wish I would have said this last week in the last podcast . Is that the best time ? Because last week we did a thing called marriage do's and don'ts . Yes , dating do's and don'ts . The best time to work on your marriage . You know what it is . It's before you get married . You know before you get married , it's you becoming a better you right now .
Speaker 1Yes , that's the best time to work on your marriages . Before you say I do , that's good . Today is good . Guys , we're going to talk about positive perspectives and God knows we need this today . Eight traits worth developing Okay , that's the subtitle today . Growth in God . It never comes to an end . This side of heaven , do you believe that ? Yes , growth in God doesn't come to an end ? What attributes are you developing in your growth , right ?
Speaker 2now what attributes ? Well , you know I was just joking about this not too long ago with someone else that I'm always working on patience , and we were saying something . I said well , maybe I'm just not patient enough , maybe I just need to be more patient . And he goes . It was Pastor Will , he goes . Oh , do you want me to pray for you to have more patience ? And I was like no , thank you , I'm good , you know I'm working on it . I got it Meaning that you know , if you pray and ask God to help you with patience , you're going to be presented with opportunities so that you can be more patient . So I think patience is one for me that I am continually working on .
Speaker 2I'm continually working on being positive toward myself . Yeah , just learning to . I think I have a natural inclination to be hard on myself , to take on too much weight and responsibility , and so I'm always working on loving myself so that I can love my neighbor as myself and being good to me . I think that's really important .
Speaker 1For me , I feel like I'm working on living with joy and peace consistently no matter the seasons , no matter the weather , no matter what I'm going through . I want to be known for my joy and peace . I want to be known for my joy and peace and I feel like I've been doing pretty good , but every once in a while you'll just have a relapse .
Speaker 1You'll be frustrated or stressed or touchy or edgy , and that's not how I want to live my life . So that's one big thing for me . The second thing I feel like I'm really working on right now is just intimacy with Jesus , and I'm really big on being close to him , understanding his word , his heartbeat , knowing his voice , listening for the still small voice of God , living my life with an invitation to his presence into all things , and so I'm working on that , and then , lastly but not leastly , I think what we're going to be talking about today .
Speaker 1I'm just working on being a more positive person altogether , and this one for me , I don't know , do you consider me to be a positive person ?
Speaker 2I do .
Speaker 1Okay .
Speaker 2I think you're positive . I think you have to . I think I'm more positive than you are .
Speaker 1Really .
Speaker 2Yes , I do . How do you think that ?
Speaker 1I think that I tend to look at the happier look at the happier , lighter side of things , where you would be more serious and . Well , I guess it depends on how you define it . If I was to say between us , I would say you are , if there's like , let's say , in the house with the kids or just in life in general , I would think that you would have more negative thoughts period than I would .
Speaker 2Interesting .
Speaker 1I think that I would be a little bit more carefree , but not like you carefree , like joking and like stuff like that . I'm a little bit more serious in my approach , but I'm just thinking overall , general , like I feel like and this is not even a slight , this is not , it's like we just have a conversation , husband and wife in traffic .
Speaker 1I feel like you can be a little negative . You know , like with yourself you can be a little negative , maybe with the kids a little bit negative , but I mean I'm sure I am too . I mean , I think my point is this that's like our default flesh , my flesh is default negative . So I always have to keep purposeful , intentional effort to be positive . But it's so important to be positive . But I think it's interesting that you think that I'm more negative .
Speaker 2Yeah , I would think . Yeah , I guess it's just depending .
Speaker 1You mean that I'm more serious .
Speaker 2I think is what you mean I would say more serious . I don't think you're negative . I don't think I'm negative either , but I think when it comes to joy , Definitely not in comparison to some yeah In comparison to , or even thinking about , joy and being jovial and fun loving . I think I do . I can be more like , especially in the house with the kids and in traffic , when I'm more intense , more intense , yeah , like , get this done and for me come down here and take out the trash and you know so for me , I don't think I'm serious .
Speaker 1I just think I'm , I have responsibility and I'm disciplined , so for me I feel like um that might come off as negative , but it's more so .
Speaker 1I got things I need to do and I have responsibilities and a lot of people are eating because of us , or you know a lot of people I need to care for , minister to . I say that because if you think about me when we first met before responsibility and kids and business and all that I think the foundation of me is pretty lighthearted , pretty carefree . I think we even see that in my son , in Kenny , yeah , and I mean honestly see that in my son , In Kenny yeah .
Speaker 1And I mean honestly . I'm trying to get back there and live there . So now my and this is why I'm working on it , because how do you leave live carefree with so many cares ?
Speaker 2Yeah .
Speaker 1You know , like in you know , even before we began to air negotiating with banks and speaking to underwriters , putting out problems and fires and such serious things . What I'm trying to do right now and I'm on my way there is how do you do that , but still do it with joy and peace and just carefree and just with a positive perspective .
Speaker 2Yeah , I think it's an attitude , um , definitely an awareness of yourself and your thoughts and , you know , a thankfulness , a gratitude in your everyday walk , because the same things that like doing this podcast could stress you out like , oh my gosh , we have to do the podcast and I have a thousand other things .
Speaker 1If you're not careful , everything can stress you out . Everything , yes , the kids .
Speaker 2Yeah , Everything . But things that were once a blessing and you wish you had the opportunity to do this podcast , or you wish you were married , you wish you had kids you know what I mean . Like those things that they were once a blessing can now become you know a burden , yeah . Uh , if we you know a burden , yeah , if we don't have the right perspective . So I think it's always being aware .
Speaker 1Well , I'm glad you said that , because today's title is positive perspective . How would you define perspectives ?
Speaker 2Point of view .
Speaker 1The way you see things the way you see things .
Speaker 1And so perspective is so important , because one thing that I've tried to do to really help , especially with other relationships , is can I put myself in their shoes ? I think we call that empathy where can I feel what they feel ? Put myself in their shoes or see things from their vantage point and I think it's huge , especially in a marriage relationship Like if you're frustrated and going through things instead of me saying , well , you're not doing this and doing that , can I put myself in your shoes ?
Speaker 2and see things from your perspective , that will squash so many arguments that will kill so many , just like sleepless nights , bad attitudes . When you put yourself in their position , in their shoes and see from their perspective , it really changes things .
Speaker 1So for me , a life is a lot about fighting for the right perspective . People , you know , everyone has their own version of reality and your version of reality might be real to you , but it doesn't make it real . So if you work for a supervisor , you work at a company , and if you want to be a great employee , you have to fight to see things like your boss sees them . Try to , just for a second , see things from a different perspective . It's easy to have one perspective , so when it comes to politics , I'm trying to see things from all different angles . I don't want the media to put me into one view . I want to see things from many different views so that I can conclude correctly . And I think that that works in the workplace , it works in the business world , it works in the home . I guess we can call it the fight for right perspective . And I think that some people they just don't have enough intentionality to say , okay , let me look at it from this angle and this angle and this angle and this angle before I judge it too fast , and it's important .
Speaker 1So to me , positivity is huge and for some people that might sound like self-help or something that's not spiritual , but I think it's very spiritual Because if the Bible says , have faith , there's a positive perspective to have faith . We call it expectation . Expectation is an outstretched neck anticipating something good to happen . That's like being positive Hope . Hope , Like these three abide . The greatest of these is love , faith , hope . And being positive hope , hope , like these three abide the greatest of these is love , faith , hope and charity .
Speaker 1Faith hope and love . So hope is like positive , something positive , um , and matter of fact , philippians , I think it's four . It says um , uh , if there'd be anything lovely , pure good rapport Pure good rapport , think on these things .
Speaker 1So basically it's telling us we need to be meditating on positive stuff all the time , and so if you can get your mind to where you can think the best of people , to where you think that God is moving instead of God's not moving , it will keep you out of skepticism and fear and just bad places . So it's like being a positive person and I don't know about you .
Speaker 2I think it's important . Yeah , the Bible says that as a man thinks in his heart , so is he , and so I mean , I think science has proven , and you know . So all of this . I think science proves the Bible and all of that . But you know , even science has proven that . You know we are what we think , and so if you think wrong thoughts all day long , you're going to be a negative person . Thinking positive thoughts all the day long will produce a positive attitude , and so I think that's very important .
Speaker 1How do we tell if we're negative people ?
Speaker 2How do you tell ? I'm guessing that negativity produces fruit . You know a certain kind of fruit , a negative fruit . How would you be self-aware enough to know that you're a negative person ? Are you grumpy a lot , you know , are you ? Are you skeptical ? Are you quick ?
Speaker 1to kind of get mad . Yeah , are you critical ? How do you know ? Yeah , critical , are you judgmental ? Are you critical ?
Speaker 2How do you know ? Yeah , critical Are you judgmental ?
Speaker 1Are you competitive ? Do you , you know , compare , compete and compare to where you be little . Are you touchy , fretful ? Are you anxious ? Are you , are you mean ? There's a lot of mean people out there . Mean in the name of Jesus . It's crazy . Wow , what a contradiction . But um , you know , I don't know . I think we all need people in our life that can identify blind spots and I think sometimes we're negative and don't know it .
Speaker 2Yeah , I think your family and people closest to you would be able to point that out .
Speaker 1Well , when you said family , I was thinking but some people got such a negative family that they don't know no better . I think that that's just life , and it's like oh , you're negative . You're a negative Nancy . Oh my God , you know , and it really would to me . When you're negative , it actually hurts you . It just hurts you . I almost see it like an ulcer .
Speaker 1You know , you're hurting yourself from the inside out . So I don't know . So let's just say for me right now and maybe there's some other people that you're out there as well I just want to be positive . You know , and maybe even some of the negative thoughts that you have are not even your thoughts . It's Satan throwing thoughts to see if you'll take it and become more negative .
Speaker 2Yeah , wow , you know , I think I know for myself like if I have one negative thought , it's like it leads to another , and another , and another , and you go down this deep , dark tunnel To where you're just mad , yeah , yeah . And now you're sad and you know lonely and you're just mad at everybody and you don't even know why at this point . But it started with one thought that we didn't check at the door to your spouse , the more negative you can be towards them if you're not intentionally positive .
Speaker 1That's why this is so important . You know you can take someone who's beautiful and be like .
Speaker 1Well , your hair is and your breath is and your nose is and you need lotion and , oh my God , you get on my nerves and you're not smart and you didn't pay the bills and it's like you are a negative Nancy and it's hard to live with a person like that . That's not a good life for anybody . But what if you could flip it and just like even what I'm doing with you right now ? I'm choosing everything to be positive about you Like , I love your hair and your eyes and your skin .
Speaker 1Do you have to work hard to do that . Do I have to . I feel like I set myself up for that .
Speaker 2I'm just trying to help the people .
Speaker 1You really did I felt like that was a serious question whether you want to know ? Do you have to work hard towards me ?
Speaker 2No , you don't have to work hard . Sometimes I do you do , sometimes I do you be negative towards me .
Speaker 1I can tell by the way you be negative , especially like if I bring in some food into the bedroom and you're trying to sleep and you got these super bionic nose nostrils it's waking me up , you got barbecue chicken times .
Speaker 2Did you eat ? Yesterday you had dinner and then last night I smelled food just all in my nostrils .
Speaker 1That's your problem . You're negative and you don't even know this morning .
Speaker 2Early in the morning you were eating bacon .
Speaker 1When I went downstairs I'm downstairs in the kitchen eating bacon . Did you many ?
Speaker 2times did you before you went to bed . And then , right , I'm like what is this guy doing ? So ?
Speaker 1that's negative . So , maybe I just need to point it out a little bit .
Speaker 2Maybe I can help you , can I help you ? Can I help you ? Have a boot camp for that .
Speaker 1I love you anyway , I'm getting over your negativity boot camp . I want you to sign up .
Speaker 2You just wanted to point out .
Speaker 1you started to point it out , so I started but I well , you try to , you try to , you try to trap me in a question . Well , I'm just trying to help the people of the lord you try to trap me .
Speaker 2You trap me in a question about .
Speaker 1Do I have to do that with you ? A lot and I'm , and then I had to get out of the trap , letting you know that you are the one who needs to not be negative towards me . I can go through a bunch of list of stuff . I can too . Yeah , you know how you feel about the mail that's out on on on the front place and all the boxes that's in the front of the , in the doorway right now .
Speaker 2I don't like it at all . Yeah , I know what does it mean .
Speaker 1I'm negative about it .
Speaker 2What did you come and say to me , the other ? This is not being negative , this is stating the facts . I told them that they are going to go and be responsible for cleaning the kitchen , just those two , the two younger ones . Because what they do is they say , oh , I'm just going to leave it here and then somebody else is going to come pick it up . But who's the somebody else ? Either me or you .
Speaker 1Well , I thank you for that story , but is that negative or positive ? If you had to rank it on ?
Speaker 2one . I think it's positive .
Speaker 1You're positively being negative towards what you're going to do .
Speaker 2I'm not being . That's not negative . No , not now .
Speaker 1But there was a whole attitude with it . There was a whole vibe with it that was like I don't know what I'm going to do with these kids .
Speaker 2If I said that , yes , that was negative .
Speaker 1Anyway , we're going to help her . Y'all stretch your hands towards Sister Tabitha here .
Speaker 2Pray my strength in the Lord . You have to lay down the law with these children .
Speaker 1We love them . We got the best kids on the planet . We really do . We do . Colossians , chapter 3 . Let's at least read some Bible today . Y'all ready ? Colossians 3 , verse 1 . It says and tell me what you get out of this . We're going to have a conversation with him . Then we're going to give him eight traits . If , then , you were raised with Christ , seek those things which are above , where Christ is Sitting at the right hand of God . Set your mind on things above , not on things on the earth , for you died and your life is hidden with Christ and God . When Christ , who is our life , appears , then you'll also appear with him in glory . Therefore , put the death your members which are on the earth for an acclamation . Uncleanness , passion , evil , desire , covetousness , which is idolatry . Because of these things , the wrath of God is coming upon the sons of disobedience in which you yourself once walked when you lived in them , but now you yourselves are to put off all these anger , wrath , malice , blasphemy filthy language out of your mouth .
Speaker 1Come on , somebody , do not lie one to another , since you have put off the old man and his deeds and put on the new man , who is renewed in knowledge according to the image of him , who created him .
Speaker 1Where there is neither Greek nor Jew , circumcised or uncircumcised , barbarian , scythian , slave , nor free , but Christ is all and in all . Therefore , as the elect of god , holy and beloved , put on listen , tender mercies , kindness , humility , meekness , long-suffering , bearing with one another , forgiving one another . If anybody has a complaint against another , even as christ forgave you , you also must do for them . But above all all these things , put on love , which is the bond of perfection , and let the peace of God rule in your hearts , to which you were called to one body , and be thankful . Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly , in all wisdom , teaching and admonishing one another in Psalms and hymns and spiritual songs , singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord . And whatever you do in word of deed , do it all in the name of Jesus , giving thanks to God and the Father .
Speaker 2Through him , anything jump out to you from that Whatever you do , do it in the name of Jesus . The last part yeah , do it as unto the Lord . Yeah , it really speaks to me as a mom and as a wife , because those are the most private areas , the most demanding areas , the most sensitive , you know , highly emotionally charged areas of our lives , and so it makes me . I mean , I think with you I'm pretty good . You're an adult , you know what I mean . I don't have to parent you and talk about rules and things with you , but really , particularly when it comes to children , in our children , like you said , it is a balance . Like , yes , I need to parent them and discipline them and correct them , but also love them and not condemn them and not , you know , speak unkindly or be angry or in wrath or practice malice , you know . So it's like , oh , my , you know . Like it really is like , okay , lord , help me out , help me to do this .
Speaker 1Yeah , yeah , yeah , I don't know . Once again , I got a long way to grow on this one , but when I read the tone of these scriptures , meekness and humility , and kindness the first thing that I think is like that's the opposite of what we hear online a lot in the name of . Jesus . We hear ridicule and slander and persecution , all in the name of calling somebody out . We hear it's just the tone . See , a lot of times when I listen to people preach and share the gospel , I listen . Do they have the spirit of christ ?
Speaker 1yeah and I think that there is a time for calling things out . But I think we many times people are calling out things that the hand of the lord is on Churches and ministries who are bringing a lot of souls into the kingdom , but they're a different style than what we like or they have a different presentation than what we like . They're still lifting up the name of Jesus , but just because they're a different denomination , a different stream , we would rather make them the devil , and that's the level of blasphemy when you call a work of God some of the nightclubs , abc , liquor stores , um the corrupt politicians and the witchcraft and the Ouija board people and uh and the false , the stuff that deny Christ and say aliens are coming back , like we're wasting way too much energy with .
Speaker 1Oh , was that baptism real ? Like , so for me , I've , I've retired from that . I don't see it , I don't hear it , I'm done with it I will I will unfollow .
Speaker 2I'm like I don't like this , so anyway for me in my house .
Speaker 1I'm listening , and I'm listening for the tone of kindness , I'm listening for the tone of humility . I'm looking for the listening , for the tone of unity I'm looking for and I learned this principle years ago it's that in the essentials we have unity , but in the non-essentials we have liberty , meaning that we have , we need unity , that Jesus is the way , the truth and the life there's no way to the father except by him .
Speaker 1That is an essential . We all need to be saying that as Christians . But we have liberty and a whole lot of different ways to get this gospel out . Different , you know , different dresses , different styles you got long services .
Speaker 2You got short services . You believe in tongues , you don't believe in tongues . Whatever , with all of that ?
Speaker 1to be honest with you . None of that is really depopulating hell and populating heaven . You might not understand something that I understand . You know what I'm saying . Like , I really have a great understanding , in my opinion , of certain things , and so I'm not going to live my life at another person's revelation because they just don't understand it .
Speaker 2They just don't understand it and I didn't understand it either , years ago .
Speaker 1But I always listen for tone . So I have eight traits , eight things that I see out of Colossians that I want to highlight today . Number one it says to seek things above , jump in whenever you want , and God has to be sought for . To me , it reminds me that we have to go after him , to seek the things above . I thank God , I have a degree , you have a bachelor's degree . We love to study and we love to handle all of the natural responsibilities that we have . We have an investment portfolio . We do a lot of different things , but I want to seek things that are above as well . I don't want to seek just things that are natural . Those things are good , but to me this means it places the priority on eternal matters and on spiritual matters .
Speaker 2Yeah , what was it that you said to seek love ?
Speaker 1I said seek things above Seek things above , oh , okay . Because I'm kind of . There's eight things that I see out of Colossians . The first one was to seek things above .
Speaker 2Yeah , seek , things above . I'll give you number two , see if anything sticks out .
Speaker 1It says to set your mind on things above Okay .
Speaker 1And so to me when OK , and so to me when it says to set your mind , that means that you have to set your thinking , like my brain can . My thinking can go negative fast , it can go lustful fast , it can go competitive fast , like one of the things that , even on social media , is that I'm getting off social media more and more . I'm limiting myself because I can feel the thoughts that I have not being thoughts that I need , whether it be I feel less than I feel I'm not far enough , they're too far . I'm not for all those things . That's not helping me , none . I don't know why that can be a trigger .
Speaker 1But , for me . I got to set my mind on things of love . I want to keep my mind stayed on Jesus . He keeps me in perfect peace where my mind is stayed on him .
Speaker 2Yeah , that's so true . I mean , it's intentionality . Like you said , it takes a lot of effort . I think you have to be intentional with you , know what you're watching on tv , what you're listening to the radio . So I like to listen to talk radio , I like to hear what's going on in the world , I like to hear what's going on in politics , but at the same time , because I like to pray about it . But then also , a lot of times , I have to turn it off . And you tell me that , and you've been telling me that more and more , as we get in the car and we're driving together , I'll have the radio playing and sometimes it's just like it's playing and I'm not paying attention to it .
Speaker 2And you're like wow , this is negative . Do you hear this ? And I'm like , wow , no , I didn't , it is negative . I don't want to become desensitized to negativity and I think a lot of us have been .
Speaker 1So me and Kenny we were watching a sporting event and , man , we was like giving each other high fives like oh goodness . And then the thing went off and the nightly news came on and it went just like this Little girl found dead in the pond On the news 10 minutes , this person here . There was a car crash and people burned to life . It was like three things . And me and Kenny looked at each other . He was like oh my God , now he's 13 years old .
Speaker 1He was like we can barely watch the news because all it is is negative . I mean , no , he literally is like I don't believe that , like what is this about ? But that's so normal . We got to set our mind on things above Number three . It says it talked about dying daily . Okay , and it says something like we died , so it made this frame that we died Let me see that's salvation .
Speaker 1Yeah , we died , we died , we died . Let's see . Therefore , put the death of your members somewhere , for you died and your life is hidden in Christ . That's verse number three . I think that when people come to Jesus , they don't know that before there is a rebirth there needs to first be a funeral , and sometimes I see people struggle in their Christianity , especially when it comes to being in ministry , because they're just not dead enough . Because you have to come to the place where you die so that the life that God wants you to live you can now live by the faith in the Son of God , who gave himself for you . So there is a level of giving yourself away . I know Pastor William McDowell had this song years ago I give myself away , and what it really means is that if you give yourself away , god's going to give you something that was better than what you originally intended . But I don't think there's enough funerals .
Speaker 2There's not enough dying to see . Yeah , but what do you mean by that ? Like that you have to die to yourself or you don't ? You know you haven't given yourself away . Like , give me some examples . How have you died to yourself ?
Speaker 1Okay , so my life is not my own , so I'm not going to live in a city just because I like the climate . I want to be where God's called me to be .
Speaker 2That's good .
Speaker 1I don't want to be in a church just because my family goes there , or it's the domination I'm familiar with . I want to be there because God called me there . When I first got into business school I said I'm going to have a real estate company called Claytor . Realty and I'm going to build apartment buildings . And you was with me . Remember all the development books that I would read .
Speaker 1And I said I'm going to have Claytor Realty and I'm going to build shopping centers and apartment buildings and I'm going to be a property manager . But then the Lord said I've called you to ministry . So I had to give away my development books , walk away from my career to answer my calling . And so that doesn't mean that I don't , 15 years later , have investments and have a green light to do certain things on the side after 15 years .
Speaker 1But it just meant that what I wanted was swallowed up by what he wanted , and actually what he wanted has been better than what I ever wanted . So instead of flipping houses , we've been flipping souls .
Speaker 2Yeah .
Speaker 1And I think that that's the things that have . So to live , you first have to die .
Speaker 2Wow .
Speaker 1And so it's almost like dying to what I want , my dreams , my ambitions . Da , da , da , da da . And say God , you do what you want to do with me that's good , yeah , that's good , yeah , that's good . Number four stuck out to me is this is that you got to put on ? You got to put off ? So it went through this phrase where it says to put off certain things fornication , uncleanness , passion adultery , all these different things .
Speaker 1Then it says to put on these things . And I think that sometimes we try to put on what's right without putting off what's wrong yeah , and it doesn't fit right . It's too tight , you don't , you know it's just well , you're trying to put new clothes on top of dirty clothes , and so I think we need to take a season of putting off wrong mindsets , lust , jealousy , pornography , addiction .
Speaker 2put off wrong things and then put on the right things mercy and grace and all these different things , and I think because sometimes it seems like you get born again and all of a sudden you're supposed to be this perfect Christian and when you do wrong things or people might talk about you , or now you feel bad because you're supposed to be a Christian but you're doing these things , and I think that's the wrong perspective . You get born again , but then that's the event of salvation . You are now born again . Nothing that you can do can separate you from the love that God has for you . Now you have to walk out your salvation . You live every day taking off those old things . It's a process .
Speaker 1You're laying down all of those old things . I heard a preacher say it like this that you got saved , you're being saved and you're going to be saved . I heard a preacher say it like this that you got saved , you're being saved and you're going to be saved . That means when you accepted .
Speaker 2Jesus , you got saved .
Speaker 1But you're being saved every single day , or you're being sanctified , you're being transformed more and more into the image , and then you're going to be saved when your spirit leaves the body , and you're going to be eternally with Jesus .
Speaker 1And so I think that's important . Thank you for that . Number five is this the tone of the believers ? I see that . I see that here , and so that's what I started talking about . I think verse 12 is the kicker for me . It says , therefore as the elect of God , holy and beloved , put on tender mercies , kindness , humility , meekness , long-suffering , bearing with one another and forgiving one another , as anybody has a complaint against another , even as Christ forgave you , so you all must do . This is a scripture that I think we need to make it like in the forefront in the faith-based community , because we need to see more kindness , humility , meekness , long-suffering , bearing with each other , forgiving one another . Let me just talk to me . I got some work to do on that . I got to get better at that . Just kindness , humility , meekness , long suffering , forgiving one another . If anybody has a complaint , forgive them . That tone doesn't that feel different than like the popular tone today ?
Speaker 2Cancel culture . Cancel culture criticism exploit them , expose their weaknesses tear them down , get them out , banish them .
Speaker 1They're a false prophet , they're a false teacher , they're the devil , they're this , that and the other . That sounds just like a pharisaical spirit , and it's just not the tone .
Speaker 2You see the tone , yes . So yeah , we love covers a multitude of sins . We turn the other cheek , we pray for our enemies , but even now I feel like I'm talking in a I've just kind of like dove into this , Like I feel a lot of peace . I feel a lot of , even when you're reading the scripture and you're talking about you know what we should lay down the wrath , the anger , things like that but we pick up , you know that which is holy , and we practice forgiveness and kindness and humility . It really makes me feel like , oh , like it just dropped a bunch of weight off of my shoulders , Like remember , oh , I remember , it's not that serious .
Speaker 1It ain't that serious . That's what I heard before you said . It ain't that serious . It's not that serious . Calm down , take a chill pill . Chillax woman . It's not that serious . Yeah , what is the ?
Speaker 2thing Keep calm and carry on .
Speaker 1It's okay , but I'm going to hit you with number six , because what also I pull ?
Speaker 2from this . It says let peace rule your heart .
Speaker 1That's good man , that's a podcast all by itself .
Speaker 2Yeah .
Speaker 1Think about that title Let peace rule your heart . Think about that hat Peace rules my heart . Think about that hat Peace rules my heart . That shirt Peace rules my heart . Think about that . Marriage yeah , we let peace rule our heart around here . What if we trained our churches ? Yeah , we got peace . That rules our heart . I love the peace of God . It talks about how the shalom of God will guard your heart and your mind through Christ Jesus . There is something about the peace of God that's powerful and it says let peace rule .
Speaker 1Let it rule , Not stress not anxiety , not frustration , not competition , not judgment . Let peace rule . And I don't know . There's just something that's like lioness about that to me Like let peace rule your heart .
Speaker 2Like I want it all up in here . I want the peace .
Speaker 1You know I want to be known for that . I step into a room . I want to be like that guy there brought peace with him . He brought joy with him . We can feel it . I wonder , can you grow to where there's like a tangible anointing of joy and peace , like when you step up ? I think that you probably can , cause God is peace . So if you carry that and that's what you lean into I don't know Y'all , let me know what you think . I just feel like that's like you know , like you work in a place that's toxic , but when you step into the room peace shows up . You don't even got to open the Bible .
Speaker 2You are the man Because you carry it with you . Yeah , you carry the shalom of God . I believe that a hundred percent .
Speaker 1Ain't that a goal ?
Speaker 2Yeah , I like how it says you know to let peace rule , meaning that , like everything that you do is kind of ran through this filter of peace . So if I am ruling , you know like you can't do anything unless I say so it all has to come through me so whatever thought , whatever action , whatever deed , it's going through peace first , and so let peace rule . Let peace be your umpire . I love it .
Speaker 1Number seven is be thankful , because I feel like it's the glue that holds everything together . So in my personal quiet time , for some reason , thanksgiving has been jumping out off the page , like do this with Thanksgiving and I feel like it's the glue that holds it all together , like a grateful heart that holds it all together Like a grateful heart , it's hard to be mad and grateful , bitter and grateful , entitled and grateful .
Speaker 1It's hard to have a bad marriage if you're so thankful for your spouse . It really is . It's hard to be bitter towards God if you're so thankful for the cross and that he bled for us and he died for us and he was beat with a cat of nine tails and he went to hell so I wouldn't have to go . If you're just super grateful . The reason that people will throw away Jesus in the Bible is they don't care no more . They are ungrateful of the sacrifice . But I just feel like man , so I'm thankful .
Speaker 1I'm just so thankful right now . I'm thankful for my pastors . I'm thankful for those who are overseers for you and I . I'm thankful for my friends who have stood with us and prayed for me . I'm thankful for every person that's a part of our church that is given and they pray . I'm thankful for my staff . I'm thankful for our podcast team here . I'm thankful for you . I'm thankful for my children , like if I can just stay in the place where I just remain thankful and grateful and don't feel like anybody owes me anything .
Speaker 1I'm not God's gift to the earth . So to say , you know what I'm saying , just stay in a place , man , thank you , I'm just grateful . And number eight is do all things as unto the Lord , and I think you hit that one earlier . So everything that we do , we're going to do it unto the Lord , and when we do it as unto the Lord , only the Lord will reward us . This is eight traits worth developing , also talking about having positive perspectives .
Speaker 1All right , hey guys , we're out of time for today . If you enjoyed today , let us know . We'd love to hear from you . Every once in a while . We do like a Q and a session . If you have a question for us about marriage , about the Bible , about anything , shoot it over . Email address , of course , is in the show notes and we would love to hear from you . Like , share , comment , write a review . Let us know how this has been a blessing to you . Help get the word out .
Speaker 1Man , our family's growing , the Doing Life with Ken and Tabitha family's growing , and I believe that there's a lot of people around that need some help . You know we have a vision to help lead a million marriages closer to God and closer to each other . We've got a couple of products . We have a Better Marriage Online Boot Camp . We believe that any marriage , it doesn't matter how bad it is if you can do the work , it can get better . We would encourage you to sign up . You can find more information about that in our show notes as well . And just remember , we come on every Thursday at 3 pm . We'd love to see you next Thursday .