Hey , welcome to Doing Life with Ken and Tabitha . We are so pumped that you're tuning into this podcast . It has been designed
for people just like you . We wanna do life with you , share our wins , our defeats , our ups and our downs , in hopes that you'll grow closer to God and to the people that you love in your life . Sit back and enjoy today's podcast . We're pumped about today . Today's segment is entitled Becoming the CEO of the Home . All right , and today's segment is for husbands and wives , it's for married people and single people , it's for old people and young people , it's for business people , it's for employers and employees , and so , traditionally , the acronym CEO stands for what ?
Speaker 2Chief Executive Officer , Come on girl .
Speaker 1I don't know if I would have got that right , but I would have thought about it for a minute . I had to think about it . Chief Executive officer .
Speaker 2Come on , girl , I don't know if I would have got that right , but I would have thought about it for a minute . I had to think about it .
Speaker 1Chief executive officer . And what does a CEO do ? Here's the definition the CEO is the highest ranking person in a company . While every company differs , ceos normally manage the overall operations and profitability of a company , so typically the CEO is the head person in charge . All right . The problem is that in many marriages there are too many CEOs and not enough CEOs . There are too many CEOs , chief executive officers , people who are in charge , people want to make the last call , but not enough CEOs . And the second term of CEO is being a chief encouragement officer , and so when we talk about being the CEO of your home , drum roll please . That's what we're talking about . It's about us being a chief encouragement officer and we need more CEOs in the home . Chief encouragement officer , the chief encouragement officer . And there's too many CEOs , people telling everybody what to do , but not enough people really giving encouragement .
Speaker 2All right , you got that right .
Speaker 1And so today , we want to talk about you becoming a CEO , literally . This is a way for you to get promoted at your work . People are looking for encouraging positive people . This is a way for you to have better business dealings . People are looking for encouraging positive people to have better business dealings . People are looking for encouraging positive people . This is a way for you to get married and to help your marriage . We are looking for CEOs . The world is in need of CEOs . Any thoughts about that ? To start , off .
Speaker 2Yeah , I think you're right . There's so much in our daily lives that compete with God's vision and God's word . Which is positive and good . In our lives . It tears us down all day , every day , whether it's on our jobs , social media , whether it's comparison , whether it's us tearing ourselves down , unmet expectations , unrealistic expectations . There's so many things that compete for our positivity .
Speaker 1And can I just speak to the really religious person for a moment who feels like this is just self-help and positivity ? Stop right for a moment . You got to come to the end because I'm going to show you in the Bible why this is so important . And just take it from me after 22 years of ministry there are too many negative , fault-finding , critical people that are married and they are destroying their marriages because they don't understand what it means to be an encourager . They don't understand that it's even in the Bible . And there's so many people that are destroying their churches because they don't understand how not to fault find but to be a CEO . And honestly and here's the honest truth is that I am naturally a little bit more serious .
Speaker 1That my vibe , my natural vibe is a little bit more serious that my vibe . My natural vibe is a little bit more weighty . I'm a little bit of a heavier personality and I know that about myself . But at the same time , if you go way back , like our son Kenny , like naturally I'm kind of jovial too . Naturally I'm kind of like a carefree kind of person naturally . And so what I found out is that I'm naturally a carefree , lighthearted , joyous , nonjudgmental person . But as I've aged and as I've taken on more responsibility , more success , more challenges , I've stepped into seasons where I have tons of weight and seriousness to my personality , and so my default is to go serious .
Speaker 1But what I found out is that I'm a better me and more like Jesus if I walk in the joy of the Lord , which is my strength , and I cast all of my cares towards him . And so I have to be very intentional , not to go towards my default , but to be intentional with making sure that I bring encouragement into every environment that I'm in . Like this morning I came in and I'm like I'm going to go in and I'm just going to say hello to everybody , I'm going to let them know how important they are , so forth and so on , and you can just see people just lighten up , like , oh my God , I have the ability to create that kind of atmosphere and I believe other people have that as well . Yeah , absolutely .
Speaker 2I think , just in different roles that we play in life , we have different expectations and so , like you as a leader , yeah , when you walk in the room , people are excited to see you because they're like , oh wow , there's Pastor Ken . They're excited to see you , whether they're an employer or anyone . But now if you come in and you do something other than encourage and you bring something negative , oh that's a big letdown . I deflate and beat them up . It's a big letdown . But also as a father , when the kids come in , they're happy to see you . If you come in and bring something negative , it's a big letdown .
Speaker 1Are they happy to see me ?
Speaker 2They act like they're not . You know , I understand what you're saying , but no , they aren't . I've read the statistics and I've heard people that are like 18 , 19, . Yeah , don't give up , they're listening , they understand , yeah , so yeah , but I'm just trying to point out that , yeah , when you are negative , it really brings down the whole room , it brings down people . But I'm saying that also to accentuate when you're positive , it does so much more . I mean , people need sunshine , people need a smile .
Speaker 2The key into being a CEO , a chief encouragement officer , is that in order to stay steady in it , you have to remember to encourage yourself as well , because if you're not first encouraged , you can't encourage other people . And I think in your life there's so many things I mean with our kids , you know , teenagers , college , high school , middle school , all of that stuff , the businesses that we do , the ministry that's going on , all of these things . There's so much I see you take on and handle in a day that it's easy to feel discouraged like , oh man , I didn't get to do this or that or the other , or maybe you wanted to encourage more , but you are doing it . You have to remember , at the end of the day , to encourage yourself and I think that's biblical as well to build yourself up in your most holy faith .
Speaker 1Yeah , I would give a definition for encouragement to our audience . It is the action of giving someone support , confidence or hope . The action of giving someone support , confidence or hope . My second definition would be to inspire with courage or the spirit of hope , and so they're synonymous words with encouragement , words like inspiration , reassurance and support . And so if you say I want to be a CEO , you're saying that I want to be an inspirational person , I want to give people reassurance and I want to give them support . And if you want to be a CEO of your home , it's saying that I want to give my wife reassurance , I want to give my wife support and I want to inspire her . Or vice versa , I want to give my husband reassurance , okay , and that's how you become a CEO of the home . And for me to be a CEO of the home is like a personal decision that you get a revelation on the power of your positivity or the power of your encouragement .
Speaker 1You know , I read a book and I would really recommend , especially business people and people that are supervisor . It's called the Energy Bus by John Gordon . John Gordon is a believer and he's in the business world , but he talks about . It's a fable about a man who feels like giving up on his marriage , giving up on his career and everything because things just aren't going his way .
Speaker 1And he gets on a bus and the bus driver teaches him 10 principles of having the right kind of energy . And I see that in my staff and in my team that sometimes people go through things and they come to the office with the wrong energy . They just go through life and they go home with the wrong energy and you're sleeping in the bed besides somebody and you just got the wrong energy . And there's just something about becoming a chief encouragement officer that changes the wrong energy . And so here's some scripture . Okay , first , thessalonians 5.11 tell me what you get out of this . It says , therefore , encourage one another and build each other up , just as , in fact , you're doing . Mm-hmm , what jumps out to you with that ?
Speaker 2I think it's just confirmation that , like yes , you should encourage . The fact that the Bible is commanding us to encourage one another means that we need encouragement . Like , okay , we need to be encouraged . Well , look at what it's saying . So this is a command .
Speaker 1This is an instruction . The opposite would discourage each other and tear each other down , and that's actually more common in some homes than the opposite . So the Bible says encourage one another , build each other up . 1 Thessalonians 5 and 14, . It says and we urge you , brothers and sisters , warn those who are idle and disruptive , encourage the disheartened , help the weak and be patient with everybody . The Bible's given us this . Oh God , this playbook , this vibe , this mantra of how we ought to be as the salt of the earth and the light of the world .
Speaker 1Proverbs 12 and 25, . It says anxiety weighs down the heart , but a kind word cheers it up . And so if you're a married person , what would happen ? I think , what people are waiting to do ? Well , he got to talk kind to me before I talk kind to him , or he needs to encourage me , or she needs to talk kind to me before I talk kind to her . She needs to encourage me first . No , why don't you sow a seed ? See , a lot of people want to harvest and they haven't sowed a seed . You go in with kind words , no matter what kind of words they're using .
Speaker 2You be the hero in the home .
Speaker 1You can be the CEO of the home .
Speaker 2Yeah , we have to understand . I mean , the battle is not against flesh and blood . We're not fighting each other , we're fighting powers and principalities . So , even when you are speaking negative words , if there's no person in the room and you're speaking negative words , number one , you're influencing yourself because you hear these negative words , and number two , you're influencing the spirit realm . Number three , you're influencing your environment . So , those negative words , if you were in a room by yourself all day long speaking bad words , bad words , bad words and someone else were to walk in that room , do you know what they would feel ? Yeah , bad , just bad . They would feel a dark cloud , they would feel negative energy , because that's the power that you have in your words .
Speaker 1For .
Speaker 2God said let there be light . And there was light . There is life and death in the power of your tongue , but if you start speaking life , the opposite of what I said would happen . People walk in the room and say I just feel good , man , I was having a bad day , but I just feel good right now .
Speaker 1There's power and people say that all the time in our church just something about the atmosphere .
Speaker 1It's just people loving people , encouraging people , prophesying over people , and that can happen in our homes and in our marriages as well . Romans 15 and two here's a command that says each of us should please our neighbors for their good to build them up . We should actually please our neighbors for their good , to build them up . We should actually please our neighbors for their good and build them up . Not tear them down , but build them up . That's what it means to be a CEO .
Speaker 1Proverbs 29 , 21 and nine it says it's better to live on a corner of a roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife . Proverbs 21 and 19 , it says it's better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and nagging wife . Proverbs 27 , 15 says a quarrelsome wife is like the dripping of a leaky roof in a rainstorm . Proverbs 25 and 24 says better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife . I got questions . Proverbs 19 and 13 says a foolish child is a father's ruin and a quarrelsome wife is like the constant dripping of a leaky roof .
Speaker 1Proverbs 14 , written by Solomon . Solomon , he got some issues here with with his wives , but there's some things happening here and like it's all between Proverbs 14 and Proverbs 17 . So within about 10 or so chapters 13 chapters of the Bible you're hearing this common thing . I got questions . I got questions , like you know . Why is this pointed towards a woman more than a man ? Is that like a temptation for more wives ? What's going on with King Solomon ? Was this like a big deal for him ? Is it a big deal for people in different houses around the world today ? What is your thoughts about this ?
Speaker 2I just think it speaks to the power of a woman . I think it speaks to the power of her words and her role as a wife in the house that if she is the CEO , she sets the atmosphere , she sets the tone of the house . And so I personally think that a woman runs that house If it's happy spouse , happy house where the man is the head of the house , truly indeed . But if that woman has a stank attitude , if that woman isn't submissive , if that woman doesn't care , that house is not going to be a good atmosphere there . It doesn't matter what the man's doing . If the woman doesn't care , that house is going to be just , is not going to be a good atmosphere there . It doesn't matter what the man's doing .
Speaker 2If the woman doesn't want to be happy , she's not going to be happy . So therefore , she controls what's going on in that marriage . She controls what's going on in that house . However , if that woman is a woman of God and submits her character and submits her attitude and submits everything to God and his word , well , she will be submitted to her household , she will be submitted to her husband and that house will be loving , it will be kind , it will be an encouraging atmosphere . Can I ?
Speaker 1stop you right there . Can you look right into that camera and just prophesy over a woman who's been called to be a CEO , but there's been some things that's been holding her back . Can you ?
Speaker 2just speak into that potential and call that out of her very quickly .
Speaker 1Because she needs this . This is going to save her marriage .
Speaker 2Absolutely . I think that you've been caught up and it's funny that you say that . I just see you caught up in just a web . It's just like strings and strings tangled all around you and you're frustrated . You've been deceived . You've been listening to lies , but you've been listening to lies , but you know what ? I think ?
Speaker 2That through this podcast , god is empowering you right now to be able to break all of those lies , to break all of those strings , to break free of all of the things that have bound you to this spirit of negativity that you have been saying things out of your mouth .
Speaker 2You don't want to say it , you don't like to say it , you hate being positive , but you've been feeling like you were trapped and I don't know what to do . You start , you just get mad and you just go off . No more , in the name of Jesus , there is a way out . God is able to break those bondages , he's able to break wrong mindsets and it's all going through your faith right now and your ability and willingness to submit to God and say God , I submit my ways , I let go of my ways and I want your ways . Father , help me to speak the words that you want me to say Help me to calm down , help me to hear my spouse and hear my children and hear my loved ones and respond with a loving heart and not out of retaliation . I believe God is renewing your heart and mind in this area .
Speaker 1So good , so good , and I also see a man who just you've almost given up on life . You know that you've been called to be the head , but you haven't been being the head , you haven't been leading , and I believe that God , there's a sleeping giant on the inside of you that's been sleeping and God is causing him to awaken again and I want to speak over your potential man of God . It's time for you to arise and it's time for you to awaken , and I just want to pray for those men right now . I want to prophesy over you , because you've been feeling like man I have a lot of weight on me and you feel like , can you go on ? Can you carry it ? And it's been hard for you to be CEO because you've been so down in the dumps about where your life is . But I want you to know that your best days are still out in front of you and you don't let the world to define what your success is . You need to turn that measuring stick over to your creator .
Speaker 1He's the only one that can define success for you . And I want you to know that you have been called to be the CEO of your home . And I want to speak to those of you all who are actual CEOs . You are chief executive officers , you are managers , you are supervisors , you are influencers and you are business owners . And you do so many things to be the best CEO and manager and influencer that you can be .
Speaker 1But you're giving your wife the crumbs . You're giving her your leftovers . You're giving God your crumbs . You're giving God your leftovers . And God is saying today that he wants to be your first love , he wants to be number one and he wants your wife to be number two . After your business , after your success , after your portfolio , after your investment , he wants to be number one . He's a jealous God and I believe that if you can make up your mind to be a chief encouragement officer over a chief executive officer , god's going to begin to bless you as you begin to bless all of the people that are around you . And I sense marriage is changing man . I'm sensing church is changing .
Speaker 1I'm sensing environment changes as we divorce and renounce being fault finders , as we divorce and renounce being judgmental and critical , and we become the CEOs of every environment that we step into . We're going to bring the light where there's darkness .
Speaker 2Can I get a good amen right there ? Amen , you know what I see as you were spoken . I see the men and women listening to this podcast . Right now , you're going to begin to speak words that are encouraging and positive , and I just saw them being seeds , like seeds were being thrown into the ground , and what you have to remember is that seeds produce a harvest , seeds produce fruit and as you go and you begin to be positive , you are going to have a harvest of positivity . You're gonna have a harvest of encouragement , a harvest of joy , a harvest of peace . You're gonna see it happen in your family , in your businesses joy , a harvest of peace . You're going to see it happen in your family , your businesses .
Speaker 1It's going to be good . So we're going to give you 10 ways to become the CEO of your home . Just to make it as practical as we possibly can . We're going to give them to you quickly for the sake of time . Number one you can smile more often . A smile lifts the environment . It lifts your mood .
Speaker 2That's right .
Speaker 1Number two listen genuinely when your spouse talks . Let their word have meaning to you . Don't doze off and think about the next thing . Number three take absolutely nothing for granted . Notice and appreciate small things about your husband . Notice small things about your wife . She should not be able to get her hair done and you don't even notice it . Number four compliment them regularly and consistently . Not just flattery , just saying words . For word's sake , mean what you're saying . All right . Number five believe in them , speaking to them prophetically . Take what we just did , where you see what a person could become , and begin to declare it until it's established . Number six let them know how much you support them . Sometimes your spouse needs to know it don't matter where you go , I'm going with you . It doesn't matter if you fail , I'm going to fail with you . If you succeed , I'm going to succeed with you .
Speaker 1Number seven tell them how proud you are of them . I mean sometimes , especially men , we need to hear our wives say I'm proud of you , I'm proud of the man that you've become , I'm proud of the husband , I'm proud of the father that you are . Number eight never allow your words to tear them down or to degrade them . Speak life over them , even when you feel like they don't deserve it . Okay , and so there's so many things you can . Number nine plan in the fun , stay adventurous . Always date each other . If you're married , come on y'all . And number 10 , honor them on big occasions .
No-transcript . Think that the reason that maybe some of you all are enjoying this podcast is because we're doing everything we can to build you up and not tear you down . That means a lot to people , and so just spread the love .