Feminine Energy Reset: A Simple Plan To Reignite Attraction In Your Marriage

Feminine energy made practical. If you’re a high-achieving wife who feels like the default manager at home, this reset will help you soften without losing standards. Lemon breaks down a simple 4-step plan you can try this week to cut mental load and bring the spark back.

What you’ll learn
• What feminine energy looks like at home
• How the mental load flattens attraction
• The one-sentence handoff to get something off your plate
• The two-beat pause that invites initiative
• One weekly anchor that builds connection
• A simple respect loop that restarts desire

00:00 Introduction to Feminine Energy

01:30 Defining Feminine Energy

02:19 Personal Experience and Reset

03:16 Four Simple Steps to Reignite Your Marriage

03:31 Step 1: Naming the Mental Load

05:58 Step 2: Learning to Pause

08:20 Step 3: Establishing a Shared Anchor

12:41 Step 4: Restarting the Respect Loop

14:55 Conclusion and Homework

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Enjoy the episode, everyone!

How can you be part of the movement to equip women?
1. Share the podcast!
2. Leave a 5-star review!

Thanks for listening!

If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to share this in your stories and tag me!  And don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review the podcast.

CONNECT WITH LEMON:

• LinkedIn
• Instagram
• Visit the Website
• Apply for the Cohort

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hi, friend. Welcome back to the Supportive Wife Society. I'm your host, Lemon Price. And today I'm excited because we're talking about feminine energy and not some fluffy version of this. I'm talking about the kind that lets a high-achieving woman soften at home without really losing her standards. And so if you feel like the default manager at your house and you kind of miss the spark in your marriage, then this episode is going to be for you. So I'm going to define what I mean by feminine energy into some plain English and give you a really simple plan you can try this week. This is not going to be like some full training that I do inside of the Supported Wife Society. It is a reset that you could literally do this week. So I want you to think about this. Like, does your day kind of right now look like two parallel lives? They're kind of meet in the kitchen to exchange logistics. If so, then you're not alone. A lot of us have built careers, we've launched businesses, we became the reliable ones, and then we bring that same energy home. We're efficient, we're decisive, we're organized, and we're exhausted. And then we wonder, we're like, why does my attraction feel flat? Spoiler alert, it's so hard to be the project manager and a playful, fun wife at the same time. I hear that from, you know, men all the time. Oh, my wife used to be so fun. My wife used to be fun. She used to be spontaneous. She used to be all those things. It is because she has taken you've taken over as project manager. You've taken over as the parent for everything. And so we're going to reset that a little bit. So, what do I mean by feminine energy? I don't think that being feminine means you're passive. I think that it is just a softer power. I think it's about receiving, inviting, responding, creating space. And it's about the fact that you don't have to carry everything to be valuable. It lets the people you love bring their strength to the table. Right. So at home, it can look like pausing before you solve. It could be delegation. It could be letting good enough outcomes be good enough while your connection's growing. And here's the thing I know somebody's going to ask me. I'm going to get a DM about it. I don't want you to shrink yourself. This is about choosing a different gear at home so your nervous system can relax and desire has room to actually breathe, which we could all use. So when Glenn and I actually merged our lives, I went from, you know, my own routine, my dog, my cat. I was by the pool every day at noon, to raising like two kids, volunteering, running a house, and running my business. And so it felt like I went from juggling two balls to 10, but nobody handed me extra hands here. I remember thinking, like, I don't feel like his wife right now. Um, I feel like a manager, and managing kills desire. I can't sprint all day and then magically feel soft at 10 p.m., right? Your body just says nope. And that is something I teach about in the support of wife society, like how our body actually tells us no and doesn't let us feel desire. Um, it's literally a safety mechanism of your brain. So anyway, so Glenn and I we had a reset, right? And it wasn't with some like big speech, it's these small, doable shifts that rebuilt some partnership and brought a spark back into our marriage. And so this week, I'm gonna give you four simple steps. Like they're gonna be really simple. This is enough just to see movement. I don't want you to think that you're gonna reset your marriage dynamic from one 10-minute podcast episode. It's not gonna happen. So the first thing I want you to do is, and we do this in the Supportive Wife Society, but you're gonna see and name the mental load. So you can't hand off what you have not named. So in the show notes, or you could go lemonprice.co slash audit. There is a mental load audit. I want you to take 10 minutes. I want you to brain dump everything you carry. And then again, this is deciding, remembering, planning. So write down appointments, kids' shoes, dog food, you know, birthday gifts, auto drafts that come out, car maintenance, travel plans, especially with the holidays coming up. Like, what are you thinking about when it comes to the holidays? All these million little tabs open in your mind. I just had this conversation this morning with Glenn. I was thinking about the fact that we were at the commissary Wednesday night. I'm recording on Friday. And I said to him, Oh my gosh, next week I should go to the commissary. Because especially with the shutdown, I know people will be shopping last minute at the commissary and for Thanksgiving. And listen, I'm so sorry if you don't have commissary privileges, but it is the best thing ever. And so they had displays out for like the staples you need for Thanksgiving here in the South. And I was like, I actually am gonna go next week when I have a little more free time to load up on all of these things that we need for the holiday. Those are the million little tabs that are open in your brain. So I want you to pick one recurring thing that you're done carrying by yourself. And I want you to say this exactly to your spouse: like, this XYZ has been on my plate. Can you take the lead on it for the month of November? I want you to keep it low risk and keep it real. So it could be trash day, it could be Friday dinner, you know, it could be scheduling a doctor's appointment. I want you to put it on a calendar so it live somewhere besides your brain. And I want you to, here's what I want you to do. I'm gonna put some guardrails up here, like bumpers when you're trying to bowl and you're not very good like me. Okay. I want you to hand off the what, not the how. You are only gonna step in for safety reasons or if there's like a literal, like a time bomb about to go off. That is it. That is the only reason you're going to step in. And when it gets done, I want you to say, like, thank you for taking that off my plate and stop there. We're not gonna criticize. We're not going to suggest how they could do it better. We're not doing any of that. We're literally just gonna say, thank you for taking that off my plate and move forward. So, step two is we're going to learn how to pause. And I just actually did this with the women in Supportive Wife Society. We talked about what the pause actually does. I talked about confidence loops, prediction loops, all kinds of fun things that um happen in our brain when we pause. So, if you want to know more about that, shoot me a TM and I could send new stuff to get into the community. So, with this, pause. I want you to know the leadership needs oxygen. And at home, the oxygen is silence. So when a decision pops up, I want you to wait like two beats before you answer. Okay. And then I want you to ask your like your partner, what do you think we should do? So it could be your kid asks for what's for dinner, right? And so pause, look at your husband, like, well, what do you think we should do? Right. Or a repair needs to get scheduled. Like, do you want to take this one over? Do you want to trade me for something else? I do this all the time with Glenn and I because I am home all day long and he's not. And so a lot of this like falls to me. But guess what? I don't schedule it. I don't talk to any of the people who do it. I literally just drive, like, I just had to get a new back window for his truck. I feel like I mentioned this. I had to get a new back window for his truck. I did not call Safe Flight. I didn't set anything up. I didn't do anything. And guess what? It wasn't my credit card that paid for it. It was his. So all I literally had to do was drive it to Safe Flight. He picked me up at Safe Flight. I went, took like our other vehicle to Costco, did things that I wanted to do, went back to his work. Guess what? They called him when my like when the truck was ready. And he drove me back to Safe Flight. I went home, unloaded my stuff from Costco, everything was good. I did not think about any part of that. He handled that for me. Okay. So I want you to like ask your spouse, like, can you take this thing? Are you willing to trade with me? Maybe it's the plans this weekend. Like, what's your plan for Saturday morning? And here's what I want to tell you too. If the silence feels awkward, that's good. That means the habit is loosening. I want you to resist the urge to rescue the moment with your plan. If his idea is not your exact way, I want you to just be like, cool, let's go with that. Let's go with that. That's fine. Okay, we're not, we're not rushing in. Okay, let's go into step three. So this is about having a shared anchor. So all teams have rituals. And I think that couples need one too. So I want you to pick one tiny weekly anchor that tells your bodies we are all on the same side. So some easy options. And I've done these, I would say I've probably done all of these, but you know, we get together. Um, Glenn and I will get together, even with the kids, honestly, and talk about what's upcoming, who's handling what, what does our week kind of look like? And now for us, it's a little challenging. A lot of stuff falls defaults to me because Glenn doesn't know his work schedule until the day before. So nobody kind of gives him a heads up. So, prime example, like today he only went to work, I want to say like 8 to noon. Like he'll be he'll be leaving work soon. Um, I'm recording at 11:30 on a Friday. So he'll be done work soon. That is not like I can't always plan for that. Um, there are some days where he doesn't get done until 4:30, 5 o'clock. Um, so we really, if it's stuff that has to happen before I would say 7 p.m., typically falls to me unless he's home early and then he takes it over. But we do, we sit down, like what's going on? Okay, we know Wednesday the kids have students. I have to leave the house by such and such time. You know, I'm gonna get home at this time. He's on his own for dinner, he makes his own plans. Tuesday night. I know that he usually has like his men's Bible study Wednesday mornings, like I have Bible study. So we're we're constantly like just checking in. Is there anything? Is there a dance at school this week? And the kids are not gonna get home until five o'clock on a Friday night instead of 3:30. Like it just it changed it. So we sit down and we figure it out. What does this look like? Who is carrying what? And then we make sure there's something fun. So, like tonight, prime example. Um, Blenn and I were up early this morning making chili because we have a worship and production bonfire and chili cook-off tonight. So we were up making chili together this morning, right and early while the kids were getting ready for school. Then we have that fun thing tonight. We have um tomorrow, we have separate plans. We have next weekend, we already have fun stuff planned and we'll mention it because it is a surprise party. But there's like a lot happening for um, we always make sure there's something fun, like caked in. Like, what are we doing? Let's make sure there's something fun that is for us as like a couple. And again, leave room for spontaneous things. So on Tuesday, we had to go to uh Beaufort, South Carolina to go get new military items while we were out there. We were driving around. I'd never been to Buford, I've been to like Bluffton and Halton Head, but I've never like taken the extra 10 minutes to go to Bufort. And Glenn thought I would love it. So we drove around. We were like, this is beautiful on the water. I love it. I'm obsessed with it. And we were like, why don't we just grab dinner here instead of what we were gonna make at home? So we did that. It was spontaneous, it was fun. We went for a walk on the beach afterward. There's like a cute little boardwalk. Usually go to my Instagram, um, my personal Instagram. It's just Lil'Lemon Price on Instagram. Go look at these beautiful photos. Like it was gorgeous. So here, what I'm saying is have know what's going on logistically, but add something fun to the calendar too. Add something fun. Um, it could be that you're going for a walk. Let's say every Thursday that you're gonna go for a walk, 15 minutes, no phone. Put that in maybe interweek or first Friday date night. So I've said this before, my grandparents always went on a date every Friday, actually. And I know that the economy isn't for everybody for right now. So it could just be a first Friday date night. So maybe he's gonna plan it in November, you're gonna plan it for December, and he takes January. And so it's not always on you. And here's the thing: like getting a pizza, a frozen pizza, and having a glass of wine at the house also counts. It counts. It doesn't have to be super elaborate. So I want you to put your anchor on the calendar, and I want you to protect this, like that, you know, that time together pays for your marriage. Like you would never skip your mortgage payment. Do not skip pouring into your marriage. Okay. Now, the last little piece of this is I want you to restart your respect loop. So desire does not live where resentment is running the show. So if you catch him doing something and you're like so appreciative of it, appreciative of it, I want you to say it out loud. I noticed who handled the trash. Thank you for taking it off my plate. There's no critique hidden inside of a compliment. We're not doing that. I firmly believe that respect is foreplay and that initiative is foreplex. And so when he leads, I'm just gonna, it's attractive. Period. Like it just is attractive. And so here's the thing: this might start to feel a little twitchy. Don't jump again. You might be like, I want to get in and fix it. That is normal. That is your nervous system learning you do not have to do and be on all the time. When you feel the urge to fix, I want you to try a micro reset. Right. So I want you to breathe, drop your shoulders. I want you to ask, like, is this actually mine right now? The answer is no, I want you to walk away for two minutes. If something truly falls through, then address it when you get together. We are playing the long game here. So if you start implementing this here, here's what's gonna happen in the next week. You're gonna have something off your plate. You're gonna have one decision where you pause and pass it off, and you will have a shared anchor on the calendar. I promise you are going to feel calmer. He's going to have a visible win, and that will feel magnetic. Let that be enough for the week. And here's the thing: if he doesn't respond the first time, keep your ass specific and time-bound. Can you take the lead on scheduling the you know, kids' cleanings, like at the dentist for next month or whatever? If he can't, like offer a trade, like you take this, I'll take this. And that's okay. That is okay. Now, what feminine energy is not? We talked about feminine energy here in the beginning. It is not mothering your husband, it is not swallowing your knees, it is not pretending that you do not have standard. Feminine energy is the discipline of space, it is having courage to receive and the willingness to let adults be adults. It says, I am valuable even when I'm not controlling the outcome. Okay. So your homework this week, I want you to do this brain dumb. Okay, go to lemonprice.co slash audit and get the mental load audit and choose something to hand off for the next month. I want you to pause once a day on a decision. Pause once a day and just see how it makes you feel. And then I want you to put one anchor on the calendar. And then finally, I want you to say one clean appreciation sentence when he follows through. So again, no hitting critiques, nothing like that. I just want you to appreciate your husband. If you want help choosing the right handoff, you can also take my roommates to root romance quiz. Um, just go, it's in the show notes, but it should just be lemonprice.co slash quiz. Um, and it's gonna show you where your dynamic is specifically stuck and then give you a starting point for your marriage specifically that you could do right now. But if you're like, okay, Lemon, I could use a little bit more coaching and you want this full step-by-step path, you want community, you want accountability, then I'm gonna encourage you to join the Supportive Wife Society. We keep it simple, right? We keep it respectful and we get results. And I do feel like I always have to say this: if you're ever in a situation with abuse or there's some kind of control or addiction, the advice in this episode is not for you. I want you to be safe. Um, reach out to me. I understand I have lived that life. And so I have resources and I will help you. But if you are in an otherwise healthy, functioning marriage, then run with this. I want you to seriously send me a DM on Instagram. Tell me how these shifts impacted your marriage, and I will see you all next week. Tootoloo friends.