Paralyzed by Perfectionism

Here is a sneak preview to the new Faith Flow Daily Mindset Shift. In this kick off 5- minute episode to the subscriber-only series, I tackle one of the most common causes for procrastination, inaction and stress: perfectionism. 

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Transcript

Are you a perfectionist? You may be fully aware of this, or you might have perfectionist tendencies that you aren’t aware of. Let’s take a look at the signs of perfectionism, and why it can be such a paralyzing mindset that holds you back from being productive.

I am personally a recovering perfectionist, so I know this topic very well. One of the tell tale signs of perfectionism is very high expectations. I have always set very high standards for myself and I have consistently fallen short of those standards. I am not saying that we shouldn’t set the bar high for ourselves, but I am saying that sometimes we can be unrealistic and unforgiving of our weaknesses. If you have set goals for yourself that you feel you are constantly struggling to meet, this is an issue for you.

Another sign of perfectionism is anxiety. This can be paralyzing because we want everything to be perfect and we overthink what needs to be done, how it should be done, when it should be done, what order everything should be, how it’s going to look, how it’s going to feel, etc. It goes on and on and we don’t think we can get it just right so we just don’t do it at all and then we procrastinate and it doesn’t get done.

Here is another one: difficultly delegating. Are you like me in that you feel like you have to do everything because if someone else does it, it just isn’t going to get done right? Have you tried to allow someone else to take over a task, only to lord over them and tell them how to do every step? Or maybe you leave them to it, but then you sneak back behind them and do it all over again “the right way?” You are a perfectionist, dear. This can really stop you from really being able to focus on what matters and let some less important things be done by someone else. I’ll talk more about delegation in the future, but perfectionism is going to get in the way of that.

As a recovering perfectionist, I can tell you that it can be extremely liberating to let things be less than perfect. Sometimes done is better than perfect. The thing about desiring perfection is that it is almost always unattainable. If you are able to achieve it, it is extremely temporary. That moment when things are totally perfect will pass, and you will have to come back down to reality. Reality is imperfect.

What has liberated me from the perfectionist mindset is Jesus, obviously. He is God, and my standards shouldn’t be higher than His. I can not demand from myself anything that the Lord doesn’t will. The little things that I was obsessing over, wanting to be amazing at everything, wanting to be impressive all melted away. I just need to please God. Just focus on pleasing God.

The thing is that the Lord does want perfection out of us. The difference is that He doesn’t expect us to achieve perfection outwardly, it’s inwardly. He wants us to be holy. Our human nature doesn’t allow for us to be perfectly holy, that is why He died on the cross. Hebrew 10:14 says, “For by one sacrifice he has made perfect forever those who are being made holy.” It is through Him that we are made holy. It is through Him that our souls are being made perfect so that we can be in relationship with God. 

The things that we stress about being a certain way do not mean much in the light of eternity, and it’s time to let those things go. God doesn’t expect us to in our own strength do absolutely everything in glorious perfection. He want our hearts to be right. It is more important to Him that we do everything for His glory and not our own. He wants our attitudes to be right. He wants our motives to be right. Nothing we do outwardly is going to impress God, no matter how perfect we think it is. He sees through all of that. You don’t need to impress God, He already loves you. You don’t have to prove anything to the Lord, because He made you. You don’t need to be perfect. You do need to be surrendered. 

Give over all of you flaws and imperfections to the Lord. Let go of that stress, and let His strength make your heart perfect before Him.