Happy New Year: This Decision Might Change How Your Entire 2026 Unfolds

Happy New Year. I know it's been a while, but I feel like I have something to say that would benefit you as you start 2026 fresh.

A lot of life changes for me recently. Since the last time I've been on this podcast, my son was born—I've become a parent, a dad. You start to see the world through a different lens and perspective. And I think it really brought something into focus for me, especially over the last year being a parent: how other parents have such strong opinions and beliefs about everything.

If you somehow have a different belief or carry a different set of rules or want to parent differently than what they believe is the right way to do it, then instantly it's like you're demonized. And this isn't just in the world of parenting—this is in everything. Your life, your hobbies, your business, whatever it is that you want to do.

If you aren't careful with these opinions and you aren't careful with how you manage everybody else in your life, then all of a sudden it starts to take you over and it starts to change the way you act.

THE BEST WEIGHT YOU CAN LOSE

The message going into the new year—and this is something you can really do yourself, almost like a self-audit—is this: the best weight that you can lose in your life is the weight of other people's opinions. Free yourself completely from the shackles of other people's opinions.

It's not something that happens by accident. It's not something you just wake up one day and do by flipping a switch. It's something you have to become consciously aware of all throughout the day. You have to become aware of it: Hey, I'm doing this because somebody else's opinion is hijacking my physical body. It's literally hijacking my physical body to the point where it alters the thing that I want to do.

You have to get to that point where you can say to yourself: This is the direction that I want to go. This is what I want to do, so I'm going to literally not care about what other people think. On top of it, I'm just going to cross them out. I'm going to operate as if their opinion doesn't matter.

Because if you think about it—this friend of mine believes this, my parents believe this, this family member believes that, my closest friend thinks I should do this—and you're doing something against what they believe, it's almost like you get put in the blender. Your self, your identity, and what you want to do is kind of mashed up in the blender of other people's opinions around you. It turns into mush. Your direction and your drive turn into mush because you're so afraid of what these people closest to you think.

HOW TO PUT THIS INTO PRACTICE

It's easy in theory to say, "You know what? I'm just going to free myself from the shackles of other people's opinions." That's great in theory, but how do you put it into practice so that you aren't constantly locked up or frozen or hijacked by other people's opinions?

1. NOBODY REALLY CARES ABOUT YOU

The first thing to realize, especially if you're someone who gets caught up in this: nobody really cares about you to the extent that you think they care about you.

There's a thing called the spotlight syndrome, or main character syndrome—the belief that other people in your life (people really close to you, acquaintances, strangers, people who like you, people who dislike you) are all watching you. There's this belief that you are the main character in their minds too, and that you're the main character in this whole story called Earth.

But the reality is you are not. You're the main character in your own life, and everybody else who you believe has opinions or a plan for how you should live your life? They don't actually care about you as much as you think. Why? Because they are the main character in their own story.

Transcript

Brian 0:09

Happy New Year. I know it's been a while, but I feel like I have something to say that would benefit you as you start 2026 fresh. A lot of life changes for me recently. Since the last time I've been on this podcast, my son was born—I've become a parent, a dad. You start to see the world through a different lens and perspective. And I think it really brought something into focus for me, especially over the last year being a parent: how other parents have such strong opinions and beliefs about everything. If you somehow have a different belief or carry a different set of rules or want to parent differently than what they believe is the right way to do it, then instantly it's like you're demonized. And this isn't just in the world of parenting—this is in everything. Your life, your hobbies, your business, whatever it is that you want to do. If you aren't careful with these opinions and you aren't careful with how you manage everybody else in your life, then all of a sudden it starts to take you over and it starts to change the way you act. THE BEST WEIGHT YOU CAN LOSE The message going into the new year—and this is something you can really do yourself, almost like a self-audit—is this: the best weight that you can lose in your life is the weight of other people's opinions. Free yourself completely from the shackles of other people's opinions. It's not something that happens by accident. It's not something you just wake up one day and do by flipping a switch. It's something you have to become consciously aware of all throughout the day. You have to become aware of it: Hey, I'm doing this because somebody else's opinion is hijacking my physical body. It's literally hijacking my physical body to the point where it alters the thing that I want to do. You have to get to that point where you can say to yourself: This is the direction that I want to go. This is what I want to do, so I'm going to literally not care about what other people think. On top of it, I'm just going to cross them out. I'm going to operate as if their opinion doesn't matter. Because if you think about it—this friend of mine believes this, my parents believe this, this family member believes that, my closest friend thinks I should do this—and you're doing something against what they believe, it's almost like you get put in the blender. Your self, your identity, and what you want to do is kind of mashed up in the blender of other people's opinions around you. It turns into mush. Your direction and your drive turn into mush because you're so afraid of what these people closest to you think. HOW TO PUT THIS INTO PRACTICE It's easy in theory to say, "You know what? I'm just going to free myself from the shackles of other people's opinions." That's great in theory, but how do you put it into practice so that you aren't constantly locked up or frozen or hijacked by other people's opinions? 1. NOBODY REALLY CARES ABOUT YOU The first thing to realize, especially if you're someone who gets caught up in this: nobody really cares about you to the extent that you think they care about you. There's a thing called the spotlight syndrome, or main character syndrome—the belief that other people in your life (people really close to you, acquaintances, strangers, people who like you, people who dislike you) are all watching you. There's this belief that you are the main character in their minds too, and that you're the main character in this whole story called Earth. But the reality is you are not. You're the main character in your own life, and everybody else who you believe has opinions or a plan for how you should live your life? They don't actually care about you as much as you think. Why? Because they are the main character in their own story. While you may believe that they think you should be doing something that you're not, the reality is they don't care. They just don't care about you. But in your own head, you believe they do because you believe you're the main character. You believe that you're always in the spotlight, and it's really hard living a life where you believe that the spotlight is always on you. I hate to break it to you, but most of us listening to this are not celebrities. The spotlight isn't on you. And by the way, you can even take some of the most popular celebrities in the world—they're in the public eye all the time, covered on the news, social media, TMZ. Everybody has opinions for the way they live. But guess what? Same with them too. The second the camera goes off, nobody even thinks twice about them or what they should do. It's an out-of-sight, out-of-mind thing. Opinions are cheap. Someone can be right in front of you and they can formulate whatever they think you should be doing with your life, but it doesn't really matter. If you find yourself stuck in a position believing that everyone is watching—you're afraid to do things, afraid to take a risk, afraid to take a swing in a business because you think, 'What are my family members going to think if I do this and fail? Are they going to laugh at me? Are they going to think that I'm a big joke and that they were right all along?'—remember this truth. Or maybe you want to focus on health and getting in shape this new year. You're actually afraid to make the change. You're actually afraid to eat something healthy or make a lifestyle change because everyone else around you isn't doing that and they think you're foolish or stupid for doing it. It just doesn't make any sense. I say all this as reminders to myself too. One thing I learned real quickly is in areas where I'm good at—like running my business, which I've done for the past 15 years—I'm very good at just literally not caring what other people think. I'm really good at casting aside whatever opinions or negative or hateful things people say about what I'm doing, because I realize I'm the main character in my own story. But being a parent for the first time last year, I also quickly realized that every single parent you converse with has their own point of view on things, and if you share a different point of view, they take it as an attack. If you aren't careful—and this is good advice for all parents listening—you choose your own ideas. You choose the way you want to raise your kids. You choose what you think is best for them. Don't let society, don't let other people, don't let outside influences change the way you want to do things. There's no need to buckle to that weight. Mentally removing the weight of other people's opinions—removing the weight you lose from the shackles of all these opinions that are placed on you—is the most freeing thing you'll ever experience on the planet. 2. YOU'RE GOING TO DIE ANYWAY The second most important thing to remember: at the end of the day, all of us enter the world the same way, and we all exit the world in the same way. We're going to die. So nothing is as permanent as we think. Nothing is as set in stone as we may believe. We may be afraid to make a big change, afraid to do all of these things because we assume this is permanent—that once I do it, I can't go back. But the reality is anything is changeable. Any decision you make then gives you the opportunity to make another decision, and then it gives you an opportunity to make another decision. This goes through all sorts of different areas of life where you can say to yourself, "I am stuck. I want to do X, Y, or Z. I want to do this thing. But there's people around me who think it's dumb, who think it's stupid, who don't agree with it, who think I should do something else." It's that same paralysis. But by telling yourself, "I'm going to die anyway. Nothing is permanent. I'm going to leave the world with nothing. Why not just take a swing? Why not just do it?" The regret you don't want to have is at the end of your life on your deathbed, thinking to yourself, "Why didn't I do this? Why didn't I try? Why didn't I just try and fail?" You don't want to look back at it and say to yourself, "I didn't because all these people around me thought that I shouldn't do it, or I was afraid that all these people were going to laugh at me or they were going to think I'm dumb or they didn't agree with me." You have to really lock in on what it is you want and realize that we all get one shot at life. That's it. We get one shot. And no matter what we do or how much we fail or how much we succeed, none of these things matter anyway because we don't take them with us. We're all going to die. So it's all about experience and it's all about fulfillment. Do the thing you want to do and go for it. Don't wait. Because the longer you wait, the harder it gets and the more you look back. They say if it's hard today, it's impossible in 10 years. You've got to seize the moment. In order to seize the moment, you've got to realize and tell yourself: I'm going to die. I'm going to die one day. If you find yourself stuck in paralysis—maybe you feel frustrated, maybe you're reading this and saying to yourself you have your own ambitions, your own dreams, your own thing you want to fulfill, but you haven't done it because you've been literally paralyzed or locked up by friends' opinions, parents' opinions, family members' opinions, society's opinions, acquaintances' opinions, coworkers' opinions—whatever it is, you just have to tell yourself and realize two things: Number one: They don't care about me as much as I think. Number two: I'm going to die anyway at some point, so I might as well go for it. The longer I wait, the less probability I have of actually doing it. So as difficult as it may seem, as scary as it may seem, you have to realize the opinions of those around you don't matter. It's really just noise. And that noise around you somehow seeps into your brain, which hijacks your ability to act. If you can constantly remind yourself of those things, you're already going to be ahead of most people because that's half the battle. Awareness—it's not like the shackles just flip a switch and they're removed. You have to be aware of when the shackles are actually holding you back. 3. THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO JUDGE HARSHLY ARE UNSUCCESSFUL You may be afraid of judgment. The third thing you should really keep in mind: the only people who judge you harshly are the people who are not doing as well as you. Let me say that again: the only people that are harshly judging you and are rooting for you to fail are the people who are already not doing as well as you. It's like the crabs in a bucket syndrome. You know, where you put a bunch of crabs in the bucket and all the crabs will end up getting boiled one day, because if one crab starts to crawl too high or make its way out of the bucket, the other crabs start pulling it back down. You can remind yourself that the only people that judge you harshly are the people not doing as well as you. Because in my experience, anybody who is successful on this planet, anybody who's done well for themselves, they want to see other people succeed and they're happy to watch other people succeed. There's nothing that's more rewarding to be around when you have a group of friends that succeed and everyone succeeds together and everyone kind of cheers and roots for everyone else to succeed. But that's rare. That's rare because your circle matters. I put myself in the public arena a lot, so I'm used to it and I don't really mind it. But people are always going to criticize, people are always going to leave hateful comments, spiteful comments—anything designed to make you second guess yourself and get you to shut down. They may even be the most ridiculous things. But if you aren't careful, they affect you. You just have to realize: anytime anybody criticizes me, anytime anybody is writing anything negative, it's simply because they aren't as successful as me. No person more successful than you will ever criticize you for trying to make your life better or doing something that would better whatever situation you're in. So you have to go for it. 4. BE FOCUSED ON YOUR DREAMS Which leads me to my last point: just be focused on your dreams. Be focused on your goals. Whatever it is that you want to do. The one mistake I used to make when I was younger is I somehow thought that other people around me were supposed to support what I wanted to do. I was looking for the approval of other people. I need the approval to start a business. I need the approval to lose weight. I need the approval to parent this way. I need the approval. I need to get the group consensus. The group consensus has to agree that it's the right thing to do for me. But the reality is that doesn't matter. And the quicker you stay focused on your goals—whatever goal you have, for whatever reason you have (they can be your own reasons, your own private reasons; nobody has to agree with why you want to do something or why you see value in something; nobody has to agree with it)—the quicker you stay locked in on your goals, the quicker you stay locked in on the thing you want to focus on and have such a strong conviction in that thing you want, everything else, everybody else around you doesn't matter. You don't need the approval of everyone else. That is a character flaw—when we seek approval from those around us to do the thing we know we should be doing. If we're always seeking approval from those around us, we're living to please other people at the expense of ourselves. When you have a goal, you have a vision, you have something you want to accomplish, you just go for it and you say: I don't care if people agree. I don't care if people understand. I don't care if people support me. They can all hate me because of it, but I'm going to do it anyway because in my life, I am the main character in the story of my life, and that's for me to write this story and for nobody else to decide the way the main character in my book should go other than myself. Everybody else should focus on their book. They are the main character in their book. They can do whatever they want. Who cares what they think about what you do with your life? YOUR ACTION PLAN FOR THE NEW YEAR Maybe you are somebody reading this who never thought about this before. I'm not big on New Year's resolutions—if something is urgent enough, you should start today. But they are good things to do. If you want something to focus on for the new year and you've thought about it and you've said, "I don't know what I want to do, necessarily," focus on this: Focus on shedding the weight of other people's opinions. Focus on removing the shackles of the beliefs, opinions, and thoughts of other people around you. Then watch how quickly your life changes because of it, and watch how much you become freer to do the things you want to do because you're no longer being held back. When you do that enough, you can actually make a nice list for yourself. Draw a line and say: actions that are dictated by me, and actions that are dictated by others. Just make an honest list. The goal is you want the column on the left side—all the actions that are dictated by me—you want that column full. On the right side, all of the actions that are dictated by other people, you want to start crossing those things off one by one. Because now, from having these things in your head, you realize: you know what? I'm doing these things because I'm afraid of the judgment of people. I'm afraid of other people's opinions. But this year I'm going to focus on removing those shackles. Freeing myself from that judgment so that I can ultimately do the things I want to do. If there are things you want to accomplish and things you really want to do with your life that you have not yet done, that's a really good starting point: to act purely and to free yourself of those shackles. Again, the weight you lose from the shackles of other people's opinions is the greatest weight you will lose in your life. Happy New Year.