Victoria Rayburn [00:00:00]:
Until you make time for your priorities, you won't have time for your priorities. You won't be able to pursue them well, and unless you're in constant pursuit of the things that matter most to you, these things will inevitably be put on the back burner. Also, as you assess your priorities, you might find that your priorities need to change. Every season of life looks different, and that's okay. Don't be afraid to adjust your priority list. Hey there. You're listening to the Priority Pursuit Podcast, a podcast dedicated to helping small business owners and leaders define, maintain, and pursue both their personal and business priorities so they can build lives and businesses that they love. I'm your host, victoria Rayburn.
Victoria Rayburn [00:00:42]:
And today, guys, we are taking a break from marketing content and focusing on another important topic we like to cover on the show priorities, specifically our personal priorities. Now, I can tell you firsthand that when you run a small business, it can be very easy to let your business become your top priority, especially when you find joy in what you do or you're super passionate about it. I can also tell you firsthand that it's easy to convince yourself that your business only affects you. Not your family, not your friends, not other people who are important to you. However, that's a lie. Running a small business is no easy feat. And unless you take the time to define and intentionally pursue your personal priorities, I can almost promise you that you will reach a point where your business runs your life and affects every relationship that you have. With this in mind today, I want to encourage you to use this episode to do a personal priority check and to walk you through the process I use to define, maintain, and pursue my personal priorities in case my process helps you also build a life that you love.
Victoria Rayburn [00:01:52]:
Now, before we get started, I want to offer full disclosure on a couple of things. First of all, I read a lot of self help books and a lot of business books. So the exercise we're about to go through isn't some ingenious thing that I came up with on my own. It's a combination of things I've learned from authors and life coaches like Michael Hyatt and Brendan Bruceard, and then also counselors that I've had over the years. Basically because I like processes, I've taken what I've learned from these individuals and come up with a process that works well for me. Also, while we're giving full disclosures, I haven't always pursued my priorities well. If you go back to episode one, are you prioritizing what's most important in your personal life and business? And then episode two, how my business almost cost me my marriage. You can hear the whole story.
Victoria Rayburn [00:02:44]:
There are always going to be days where I fall short. Nobody is perfect. But today, because I had to learn the hard way and was willing to make adjustments, I can honestly say that my priorities are in a better place than they've ever been before, and I am genuinely happy with where life is. Okay, all right, disclosures aside, the first thing that you need to do is determine your priorities and put them in order of most important to least important. Now, you might think that this sounds unnecessary because you already know what your priorities are, but unless you take the time to clearly define what's most important to you, lack of clarity will likely prevent you from pursuing your priorities as well as you could. So simply create your list and put your priorities in the order that you see fit. In case you need examples, your personal priorities might include your faith, your spouse, your significant other, your kids, your extended family, your friends, self care, working out, your dog, or whatever else. These are your priorities, and there aren't any wrong answers.
Victoria Rayburn [00:03:50]:
Now, in case this helps, this is what my priority list looks like my faith, my relationship with my husband, my daughter, whom we expect to arrive this December, my dog, my relationships with my family and closest friends, working out in physical health, caring for my household, my work. And yes, for the record, it's okay for your business to be on your list of personal priorities. In fact, I would encourage you to add it to your list so that you can decide where work ranks among your other priorities and then reading both for fun and for business. Now, I do want to quickly note that I am not a self care expert. And in fact, you may have noticed that self care wasn't anywhere on my list. But I personally find a lot of joy in spending time with God, spending quality time with the people I love most, walking my dog, exercising, and reading in this season. Those are my personal forms of self care. But if you'd like to hear from self care gurus, I want to encourage you to go back and listen to episode 32, how to Practice Self Care as a Small Business Owner with Courtney Porter.
Victoria Rayburn [00:04:58]:
And then also episode 60 how to Prioritize Self Care as a small business owner with Allison Ewing I don't know about you, but I often find the idea of self care intimidating. I mean, I'm not about to schedule an hour to take a bubble bath. As a result, I so appreciate how these incredible women make self care approachable and simple so that you can easily find these episodes. We'll be sure to include links to these episodes in the show notes. But anyway, back to priorities. I simply take a few minutes to determine and write your priorities down in order. And if you're married or closely share life with someone, I also want to encourage you to share your priorities with that person. It's so important to make sure that you're on the same page and that person can also help hold you accountable.
Victoria Rayburn [00:05:50]:
Again, there aren't right or wrong answers. And in every season of life, your priorities will likely shift and change. But you cannot pursue your priorities until you intentionally identify what they are. And if you're starting to feel nervous while making this list because you're realizing you haven't been pursuing your priorities, well, don't worry, we are going to talk about that in the next couple steps. Okay? So after you have your list, you need to determine how you're going to pursue your priorities. Because it's one thing to know what's most important to you, but it's another thing to actually pursue these things and have a plan for pursuing these things. So in my experience, I found that there are two ways that I can pursue my priorities well. The first being by forming habits, rhythms or rituals, like whatever you want to call them, and the second, by intentionally putting time on the calendar.
Victoria Rayburn [00:06:44]:
Okay, so let's talk about habits first, for me, habits or rhythms are anything that you can do on a daily or at least a weekly basis. Now, for example, my morning routine is very much rooted in my priorities. Every weekday, I get up at 515 to read my Bible. This allows me to pursue my faith priority. Then I pack Zach's lunch and make his coffee. My husband's love language is acts of service, so this is an easy way that I can serve him and prioritize our marriage. And he is, full disclosure, not a morning person whatsoever. So, yes, this makes him feel loved and valued.
Victoria Rayburn [00:07:19]:
Then I go to a class at the gym at 630, which is how I prioritize my physical fitness. While that happens on almost a daily basis, saturday and Sunday being the exceptions, I've also built habits around triggers. So just as another, for an example, whenever I'm going to driving for more than half an hour, I call someone who's important to me just to check in. This might be my mom, one of my grandmas, or a friend. Basically, a longer drive serves as a trigger to call someone to pursue my family and friend priority. Or when I finish my workday, the first thing I do is walk hattie our dog. That's how she gets prioritized. And yes, feel free to judge that my dog comes before many of the relationships in my life, but she is just that important to me.
Victoria Rayburn [00:08:06]:
Now, Zach and I started doing this a couple months ago, but while we typically do our Bible reading separately, on Monday nights, we started doing a short devotional together, which has proven to be a great way to prioritize both our faith and marriage. Basically, in this step, I want to encourage you to look at your priorities and determine ways, even if they are just little teeny, tiny, make your spouse a cup of coffee ways that you can actively pursue your priorities on a daily or weekly basis, so that pursuing your priorities becomes habitual. Simply think about routines and triggers you can create and go from there.
Kelly Rice [00:08:44]:
Many small businesses don't have an effective marketing strategy, and because of this, they try one tactic after another without seeing results. This not only prevents consistent business growth, it makes managing marketing efforts more difficult than it should be. As a marketing agency for small businesses, we understand how frustrating it can be when hard work doesn't deliver the results that you want. Because of this, Treefrog has developed a proven four step marketing system that will help any small business grow. On our website, you can also schedule a 30 minutes discovery call to discuss working with Treefrog to build a marketing strategy that will allow your small business to finally see the growth you've been working so hard to achieve.
Victoria Rayburn [00:09:22]:
As a small business owner, you probably have a seemingly endless to do list, but I can almost promise that there are things on your list that can be outsourced, like grocery shopping. I mean, as a Weding photographer, the last thing I wanted to do after shooting a wedding on a Saturday was to spend my Sunday in a grocery store. So I am forever thankful that a friend told me about Instacart. Instacart is a grocery delivery service. Basically, you use the Instacart app to make your shopping list. Then a personal shopper goes to your preferred store, selects your groceries for you and delivers them to you, typically all within just a few hours. You can also schedule your delivery time. Personally, I will sing Instacart's praises forever because one, it has saved me countless hours, and two, Instacart employs local personal shoppers.
Victoria Rayburn [00:10:07]:
Meaning with every Instacart purchase, you are putting money directly back into your local economy. While Instacart does charge a delivery fee, when you upgrade to Instacart Plus for just $99 a year, you'll receive free unlimited deliveries for all orders over $35. Considering the time and frustration you'll save, that's $99 well spent.
Victoria Rayburn [00:10:26]:
If you'd like to avoid going to.
Victoria Rayburn [00:10:28]:
The grocery store and save $20 on your first order from Instacart of $35 or more, visit treefrogmarketing.com instacart. Again, if you'd like $20 off your first Instacart order of $35 or more, visit treefrogmarketing.com instacart.
Victoria Rayburn [00:10:43]:
Also, in case you need help or would like to learn more about forming strong habits, I highly recommend checking out Atomic Habits by James Clear. This book guys seriously changed my life. I cannot recommend it enough, and we will be sure to include a link to this book in the show. Notes now, habits and rhythms are going to get you far, but it's also important to put time on your calendar for the people and activities that matter most to you. For example, perhaps family is one of your priorities. Everyone's family and season of life looks different, but pursue this priority. I'd encourage you determine how often you want to spend time with your family, specifically, the family outside of your household. So, for example, maybe you live close to your family and can schedule monthly or bi weekly or even weekly know very Gilmore Girl style.
Victoria Rayburn [00:11:32]:
Maybe you live far from your family and decide that visiting them for a week every year is a great way to prioritize them. Or maybe at the beginning of every month that you sit down and look at your calendar and choose an activity that you would like to do with your mom, with your sister. Again, there aren't any wrong answers. But in order to pursue your priorities, you need to be intentional with your time and calendar, especially as a small business owner or leader. Between work responsibilities and personal responsibilities, you likely don't have a lot of free time. After all, there's always something that you could be doing, and as a result, unless you plan for your priorities, you'll likely fail to pursue them well. Long story short, look at your priorities and determine how you're going to pursue each and everyone by either creating habits around them or by scheduling a specific amount of time for them. Next, on a regular basis, whether that be monthly, quarterly, annually, all of the above, or whatever works best for you, it's important to assess whether or not you're pursuing your priorities well, and if not, why.
Victoria Rayburn [00:12:44]:
To do this, I found the most helpful things I can do are to look at my calendar and then also to reflect on my relationships. For example, if you decide a monthly assessment works best for you, look at your calendar from the past month and determine if you spent, whatever your definition of enough time is, pursuing your priorities. Then think about each and every relationship on your priority list and ask yourself if you're pursuing that relationship well. In other words, are you content in that relationship, or did you fall short that month? Now, if you find that you aren't pursuing one or more of your priorities well, determine why. Now, I know it can be easy to just want to get technical and add a little time for this priority to your calendar, but in order to have lasting change, it's important to understand why you've put that priority on the back burner. Discover why this priority isn't getting your attention. Ask yourself the question, Why? Until you get to the root of the issue, like a little kit. Why? For example, during the first few years of building my photography business, I was very bad about making time for family and friends.
Victoria Rayburn [00:13:52]:
At that point, I should have had a conversation with myself that went as little something like this victoria, you've been putting your friends and family on the back burner lately. Why? Because I'm really busy. Why? Because I have a lot of work to do. Why? Because I put a lot on my plate. Why? Because I find my value in my work. Why? Because work is an idol for me. We've talked about idols in past episodes. But long story short, within the Christian faith, an idol is anything you put before God.
Victoria Rayburn [00:14:22]:
My personal definition of an idol, however, is anything you put before God or your priorities. If you aren't a believer, if you aren't a Christian, please don't discount this idea. You can still have idols that affect your priorities. And to be fair, priorities can even become idols. But that is a conversation for another day. Chances are, however, if your priorities are out of alignment, you're making something in your life an idol, meaning you're making it more important than anything else, and one or more of your priorities are being neglected. Truth be told, as a small business owner or leader, there's a very strong chance that your business has become an idol again. Before simply making changes to your calendar, it's important to figure out why your calendar doesn't reflect your priorities.
Victoria Rayburn [00:15:09]:
Because knowing why is going to help you make lasting changes as opposed to temporary changes. Once you've gotten to the bottom of why, determine what changes you need to make. For this step, all you need to do is decide when and how you're going to make time for your priorities by either forming habits around them or adding time for these priorities to your calendar. For instance, if your faith life is currently being neglected, this might mean waking up 30 minutes earlier on weekdays to read, reflect and pray. Or if you're failing to prioritize your spouse, this might mean scheduling regular date nights. If you aren't seeing your parents regularly, this might mean scheduling a time to visit with them once a month. Again, there are no right or wrong answers. But until you make time for your priorities, you won't have time for your priorities.
Victoria Rayburn [00:16:00]:
You won't be able to pursue them well. And unless you're in constant pursuit of the things that matter most to you, these things will inevitably be put on the back burner. Because especially in busy work seasons, it's easy to take our loved ones for granted, neglect our personal needs, and become hyper focused on work. Also, as you assess your priorities, you might find that your priorities need to change. Every season of life looks different, and that's okay. Don't be afraid to adjust your priority list. Now, before we wrap up this episode, I want to encourage you to ask yourself one more question. Is your business enabling you or preventing you from pursuing your personal priorities? Honestly, this is a question that I wish I would have asked myself about a decade ago.
Victoria Rayburn [00:16:47]:
You see, as I built my photography business, I truly didn't think about how it would affect my personal priorities. While I loved the wedding industry and truly enjoyed spending my Saturdays photographing couples in Texas and beautiful gowns and high end florals and cakes, I embarrassingly didn't think about how being a wedding photographer, which requires working nights and weekends, would affect my marriage or other relationships until I experienced the negative effects. So, friend, as hard as it may be for you to answer, is your business allowing you to pursue your priorities? And if not, what needs change? Don't get me wrong, there are going to be seasons in running a small business where you have to put your head down and work harder than most and maybe put your priorities on the back burner for a short amount of time. But if your business is constantly taking a toll on your personal life, changes need to be made. If you need a little help with this, I would encourage you to listen to episode 116, when and how to Pivot Your Small Business. In this episode, I share exactly why I decided to close Victoria Rayburn Photography transition into educating small businesses and partner with Treefrog, as well as six ways you can change your business to give you the life that you want. After all, what is the point of building a business if you can't also love your life? Next week, we will be back to discussing business growth systems and marketing tactics, as per usual. But friend, I hope this episode was a good reminder to check in with yourself, especially as 2023 wraps up and we're just weeks away from a new year.
Victoria Rayburn [00:18:31]:
Thank you so much for tuning in to another episode of Priority Pursuit. If you enjoyed this episode, I hope you'll take a moment to share it with your small business friends and that you'll join us next week for even more marketing, boundary and priority driven tactics you can can use to build a life and small business that you love.