The Importance of Embracing Slow Growth as a Small Business with Mary Marantz

A world that glorifies speed and instant success often leaves little room for the virtues of patience and measured progress. 

Today, we're privileged to unpack the insightful wisdom of Mary Marantz, a bestselling author, as we explore the concept of embracing slow growth in business. 

This episode goes beyond the adrenaline rush of instant gratification, encouraging us to pause and deliberately cultivate strong roots for enduring success.

Delving into Mary's remarkable journey from a trailer in rural West Virginia to a graduate of Yale, a successful photography business owner, and a bestselling author, we uncover the pivotal role that 'slow growth' played in shaping her trajectory. 

Mary's philosophy unravels the idea that enduring success in both business and life is intrinsically tied to the deliberate choice of patience and thoughtful pacing.

So, if you need a little reminder that the path to growth doesn't always have to be a sprint, this episode is definitely for you. Let's slow down together and find the true value in our growth journeys.

Specifically, this episode highlights the following themes:

• The power of 'slow growth' in building successful businesses
• The value of empathy and storytelling in entrepreneurship
• How harnessing patience can shape your journey towards success

Other Mentioned Links & Resources

Get a copy of Mary Marantz's books:
Dirt and Slow Growth

Visit Mary Marantz's website:
https://marymarantz.com/

Explore a wealth of photography resources:
https://jmthestore.com

Take the Achiever Type Quiz:
https://marymarantz.com/quiz

Follow Mary Marantz on Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/marymarantz

Learn more about Treefrog services:
https://www.treefrogmarketing.com

Get access to this free mini-course - Marketing Guiding Statements:
https://www.treefrogmarketing.com/marketingguidingstatements

Enjoy 35% off one year of HoneyBook:
https://www.treefrogmarketing.com/honeybook-coupon-code

Join the Priority Pursuit Podcast Facebook Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/179106264013426

Follow Treefrog on Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/treefroggers

Follow or DM Victoria on Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/victorialrayburn

Transcript

Mary Marantz [00:00:00]:

Card stories build empathy, and I think empathy is a key component to being a good storyteller and having sort of like that they talk about people who've gone through trauma. Your weaknesses out of that can also become your superpowers and your strengths in the form of discernment. You can look at a room and instantly get a read on the temperature. You can look at somebody and instantly know everything that's going on with them. Those are very powerful skills to have. You want to be able to tell someone else's story by understanding them on a deep level. You.

Victoria Rayburn [00:00:27]:

Hey there. You're listening to the Priority Pursuit Podcast, a podcast dedicated to helping small business owners define, maintain and pursue both their personal and business priorities so they can build lives and businesses they love. I'm your host, Victoria Rayburn, and guys, I have a quick question for you. Have you ever listened to an audiobook and loved it so much that you then immediately went and read the actual book, like the hardcover copy? Well, I can honestly say that that has only happened to me one time. I listened to Slow Growth Equals Strong Roots by Mary Marantz while walking hattie bit by bit and so much of this incredible book hit home for me that I simply had to read the hard copy as well. Plus, it's really pretty. If you're on YouTube, you can see that I'm holding it up right now. It's absolutely beautiful.

Victoria Rayburn [00:01:15]:

But anyway, today I cannot begin to express how excited I am to have Mary Marantz herself on the show. When I first discovered Mary and her husband Justin, it was through the photography world. You see, Justin and Mary are big names in the photography industry, but there is so much more to them than their successful photography business. You see, Mary grew up in a trailer in rural West Virginia, the first of her immediate family to go to college. She went on to earn a master's degree in moral philosophy and a law degree from Yale. And then after turning down six figure salary law firm offers in London and New York, and starting a photography business with her husband, where they were later named one of the prestigious Profoto Legends of Light. Guys, their work is beautiful, you should just check it out even if you aren't a photographer. But anyway, they have since gone on to build a successful online education platform for thousands of creative entrepreneurs worldwide.

Victoria Rayburn [00:02:17]:

Mary is also the bestselling author of her books Dirt and Slow Growth Equals Strong Roots and the host of the top podcast The Mary Marantz Show, which I also highly recommend. Listening to her name. Her work has been featured on CNN, MSN, Business Insider, Bustle, Thrive, Global, Southern Living, Hallmark and Family, and so many other places. Mary and Justin live in an 1880s fixer upper by the sea in New Haven, Connecticut with their two fluffy golden retrievers, and Mary has committed her career to helping small business owners and leaders see their worth outside of their work. And today, Mary is joining us on the show to break down why, as small business owners and leaders, it's important to embrace slow growth and strong roots. And guys, I just also want to say really quick that we are right before the new year. Chances are you are thinking about what your new year's resolutions are, what your goals for the new year are going to be. And as a result, I'm really excited that we are having this conversation about slow growth now because if you can enter in the new year just with a new mindset, I can almost promise you it's going to be so much more rewarding.

Victoria Rayburn [00:03:34]:

But Mary, I will let you introduce yourself more thoroughly in just a moment, but I cannot begin to tell you how excited I am to have you on the show. Welcome.

Mary Marantz [00:03:44]:

Oh, my gosh, Victoria. Well, first of all, thanks so much for having me. And second of all, I just want to know what is the bill I will have to pay to have you go around and introduce me all the that's wow. You could just whisper that to me every morning.

Victoria Rayburn [00:04:03]:

It'll be a podcast episode. We'll just make part of your affirmation list.

Mary Marantz [00:04:08]:

I love it. Well, I'm so happy to be here, so thank you for having me.

Victoria Rayburn [00:04:12]:

Oh, my goodness. Absolutely. And guys, if you live in the Indianapolis area and you saw some woman walking down the monon, like teary eyed walking her dog, that was probably me. And this was the book I was probably listening to. But it's absolutely wonderful. And Mary, I'm so excited to dive deeper into what exactly it means to embrace slow growth and strong roots. But before we do that, can you please introduce yourself? I know that I gave really just a piece of your story, but you have had a journey as an entrepreneur and small business owner, so please tell take us all the way back to the beginning and lead us up to where you are now as a best selling author, speaker, podcast host. Tell us all the things.

Mary Marantz [00:04:55]:

Yeah, I love that. You know what that kind of reminded me of? I was telling you before we hopped on that. I was recently at an author's retreat in the Smoky Mountains. 26 authors and podcasters from all over the country got together to kind of share what's working and what to try differently, things like that. And when I was flying back, I had my headphones in and I was listening to this song. It's from United Pursuit and it has these lyrics that say, take me back, back to the beginning when I was running through the fields with you, basically. And it's such a beautiful song. It makes me so emotional because I feel like all of us listening have these parts of our story that whether they were really hard or whether it was just something that we ache for.

Mary Marantz [00:05:41]:

There are these parts of our story that formed us and made us who we are. And sometimes when I think back on my story, I can sort of see this ghost of like little Mary running through the fields where I grew up in a single wide trailer on the top of a mountain in rural West Virginia. These very overgrown weeds behind that trailer giving way to kind of the deep dark woods. And even though there were parts of that that were so incredibly hard, which maybe we'll talk more about, there is still this part of me that misses that littlest version. And so I bring that up and I start with that. Because what I have come to find out about entrepreneurs over 15 plus years of serving them through courses or speaking or teaching is that there are way more of us with a muddy story than you would ever guess by looking at our beautiful websites, our put together outfits at the conferences, our business cards, whatever it is. Our email lists, our social media following. There are so many people who are walking around feeling like every room they walk into, they have something to prove that they have to walk in without a hair out of place, just as the bare minimum standard they have to hit to be invited into those rooms, to be asked to sit down at those tables.

Mary Marantz [00:06:52]:

And the very first time I spoke at a conference and I stood at the front of the room for many of the times we'd spoken at conferences before then it was all about having a new outfit, talking about how well our business was doing, whatever. And I stood up and instead I showed a picture of that trailer and I said, I am the girl in the trailer. That was the first time there was a line out the door down the hallway of people who wanted to come talk to me. Not because of me, but because they wanted to look me in the face and say, I am the girl in the trailer too. I never knew somebody like this could stand on these stages. And so I think that's the most important thing I want people to know right off the bat is we're going to talk a lot about giving up, achieving for your worth. And that is because I've spent a lifetime trying. I've spent a lifetime trying to run away from that trailer only to get to a point where I'm on an airplane after spending time with all these authors and speakers aching to go back.

Mary Marantz [00:07:40]:

So that's where we'll kind of start, I think.

Victoria Rayburn [00:07:43]:

Oh, yes, and Mary, this is not on the list of questions that I sent you, but you said you're cool to go off the cuff. So I'm just going to ask. But out of curiosity, do you think that there is some kind of tie between people who have money past and then choosing to become entrepreneurs, choosing to become business owners. Because like you said, it's not typically the information that people share initially but I know at least for me, myself included and my closest business friends, they do share similar kinds of backgrounds. So I mean out of curiosity, do you see that with your students? Do you see that with your clients and why do you think that is? I know that's like a big psychological question.

Mary Marantz [00:08:28]:

No, I already have a theory so we're in good shape. Here's my theory, the short answer and then I'm going to go for the long answer but I'll help people with the short answer is that I think hard stories build empathy and I think empathy is a key component to being a good storyteller. Whether that's a photographer or an author or a speaker or a coach understanding someone else's story. It all starts with empathy and having sort of like that they talk about people who've gone through trauma. Your weaknesses out of that can also become your superpowers and your strengths in the form of discernment. You can look at a room and instantly get a read on the temperature. You can look at somebody and instantly know everything that's going on with them. Those are very powerful skills to have if you're going to speak from a stage or if you're going to coach somebody one on one or be an author or be a photographer, any of those cases.

Mary Marantz [00:09:14]:

You want to be able to tell someone else's story by understanding them on a deep level. And so I do think that one of two things tends to happen for people who had really hard stories. They will either become empathetic and want to run so hard from their story that they want to do something very different so they become an entrepreneur or they will be so marked by the fact that there wasn't a lot growing up that they will choose the safe corporate job or the safe I almost did that. I went to law firms in London and New York to have it, spend a summer there and I had full ride offers, bonuses, moving benefits, the whole thing. We'll take you to the Broadway shows every night, whatever and that's very tempting. It's very tempting to take the life that's going to feel very set and very settled. And my parents when I got into law school were like done, you're good now that life is like paved out in front of you. And what I discovered, the thing that kind of helped me make that decision and maybe this is for somebody listening who still is in that cubicle or that corporate job or that job with the good health benefits not saying you have to leave tomorrow.

Mary Marantz [00:10:25]:

But the thing that really stuck out to me is that if someone else has made a sacrifice so that my life can be different then. And to settle is to dishonor that sacrifice. To live a life that feels safe, but ultimately is not what I know I was put here to do, to not be fully alive to the work I am called to do that actually dishonors the sacrifice that was made. And listen, I know how hard it is. I am the first person when we're coaching to say, do it smart, do it with a safety net, do it with an emergency fund, like read the book, quitter from John Acuff, do this well, but begin. We have a new year stretching out in front of us and it's so easy. I always say Decembers don't happen in December, they happen in January. We determine what December 2024 is going to feel like by thinking about it now.

Mary Marantz [00:11:11]:

And so if we want to actually start to make moves on these dreams we can't go a day without thinking about, then we start by saying, what does it look like to live by one wild and precious life fully alive? So empathy is the short answer. The long answer is I think it can go one of two directions.

Victoria Rayburn [00:11:27]:

Love that. Well, I'm so glad that I asked.

Mary Marantz [00:11:29]:

Yes, me too. Okay, so Mary, before we get into.

Victoria Rayburn [00:11:33]:

The rest of the conversation, I feel like everybody just needs a point of reference, almost a definition, but what does it mean to have slow growth and strong roots as both an individual and as a small business owner or leader? And then also, why do you feel called to spread the message about embracing slow growth, especially to entrepreneurs who aren't exactly notorious for doing anything?

Mary Marantz [00:11:58]:

Yeah. Yeah. Well, Justin Morantz, who is sitting right here, he gets the full credit for that phrase because it was very early in our business, our photography business, we had just started it. We were about, we'll say like a year in and we were watching all of these people who had started around the same time as us in different parts of the country and their business was just taken off. It was just like it felt like it was exploding overnight. And we're over here just sort of chugging along and we were at this taco restaurant. We were sitting outside, it was really bright and I had sunglasses on. I'm very grateful for that because I was actually crying my eyes out.

Mary Marantz [00:12:34]:

So frustrated. Why is it happening for them and not happening for us? When is know one year in? When is this ever going to happen? Can be very dramatic when you first become an entrepreneur, I feel like. And Justin said to me, he said two things. Number one, he said they're over there running sprints, but we were created to run marathons. And he said they're going to go somewhere fast, but ultimately if they don't change something, they're just going to run around in circles and end up back where they started, and we were put here to go the long haul. We're building something that lasts that's marathon running. And the second thing he said was, the slow growth equals strong roots. And I didn't want any of those things to be true.

Mary Marantz [00:13:11]:

Victoria this is the worst day ever. And they always kind of say, be really careful which mantras you pick for yourself, because life has a really funny way of making you live them out. And so you mentioned in the intro, we were able, over time, given this variable of time, to build a business that was very wildly successful. But we have never been the people where it was suddenly like we were just the hot thing. Everywhere we have been this very slow, very steady, very consistent climb. And the upside of that is that when we did get to being one of the names in the industry, one of the leaders in the industry, nobody doubted our place there. We had proven ourselves. We had proven a reputation.

Mary Marantz [00:13:52]:

People not only liked us, they respected us. Or maybe if they didn't like us very much, they respected us. And that kind of character, I think, is only forged. That kind of record is only forged with the variable of time. And so I say that as somebody with empathy, like we were talking about. I know how bad and how painful it is to want it to happen right now and to see it happening for other people. They started two years after me, and they're charging twice as much like what's happening. And I've also had the benefit of being in this industry long enough to see people be flashes in the pan.

Mary Marantz [00:14:24]:

So in slow growth, I have this section called Weeds, flowers, and trees. And I say for all of us in business and in life, we can choose to be one of these three types. It's very tempting in the beginning to want to be just like a weed. We see somebody pop up overnight to 6ft tall. We see them multiplying with dizzying speed, and we say, I want to grow just like that. But who among us has not gone through one of these fields like I had behind my trailer, bloop bloop bloop pulling out these six foot weeds to see they have a half an inch of roots holding them up. And so the first storm comes, and they get knocked right over. And ultimately, they grew for themselves.

Mary Marantz [00:14:56]:

They were invasive. They came and they took and they took for their own growth, and they didn't care what they choked out around them. And so we see, I think, there's this very unscientific, unproven theory that there's kind of a half life for however quickly somebody rises up in an industry, when they do it that way, we will see them just as quickly. That character won't be there to anchor them, and we'll see them just as quickly fall away. Flowers are things of beauty. We create beauty in the world. We need more beauty in the world. That's certainly always a good thing.

Mary Marantz [00:15:23]:

But for all of us, I want something more, which is to be trees. Because trees grow taller and higher than any weed to dizzying Heights, these redwood giants. But they don't do it quickly. It can take 100 years to get to where they're going. And they are a thing of beauty in and of themselves, but they are not satisfied to be merely that. They want to be shade and shelter for others. They want to bear this fruit that can be given away. And when I think about my life, when I think about my business, if I had to choose between the two fast and did it for myself and got knocked over by the first storm, or there's just going to be a different timetable for leaders like this to walk among the giants.

Mary Marantz [00:16:00]:

It's going to take some time, but you're going to build something people are going to admire and respect and be served by. I'd rather take my time. Absolutely.

Victoria Rayburn [00:16:10]:

And honestly, we could just hit end right now and everybody could just change their mindset and try to be a tree. There's so much worse in there and I mean, such a paradigm shift for a lot of small business owners. Like you said, whether it's because of social media or just because we live in a world of instant gratification, we would love to start our businesses and be a big name tomorrow.

Mary Marantz [00:16:36]:

Yeah. And you know what I just don't add to that is like, I don't know when fast became the goal. When we really break it down, what we're saying is I want the most interesting thing you can say about me to be how little time I've been at this work. That's actually not a really powerful legacy, is it? It's like I hardly had to try. I hardly thought about it at all. I didn't put in any effort to this and I got all sorts of attention. But the minute we stop acting like attention is the only goal in this social media driven instant gratification world, and we say, what is the thing that survives? Just a little bit of going viral or a little bit of getting some new eyes on it? I always tell people, like this distracted work of just trying to create content, content, content for social media. This will never be our legacy.

Mary Marantz [00:17:24]:

Deep work happens in the stuff that you cannot produce overnight and you cannot say, oh, like what? Like Reese Witherspoon. Like what? Like, it's hard. Elle woods. What? Like it's hard? No, I want to do the work that it was all of me to create, that it did bring me to the end of myself to actually birth into the world. And that is going to be hard work. It's going to be deep work. It's going to be work. There's a reason that we talk about this word passion, sometimes meaning suffering.

Mary Marantz [00:17:53]:

Like the biggest, best work we'll put out there will not always come easy. So I don't know, I just think the things we reward these days are they're upside down. They're an upside down economy. They're this fleeting currency of more. How much, how many, how fast? And it does not last.

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Victoria Rayburn [00:19:32]:

Absolutely. And not to mention too, that when you are so focused on that quick growth, yes, you have to put your head down and grind. And I think what a lot of people do forget about is what does life look like at home when you have made that business decision? So this is the priority pursuit.

Mary Marantz [00:19:48]:

Podcast.

Victoria Rayburn [00:19:48]:

We focus on business priorities and personal priorities. So just have to throw that out there really quick. If you are a weed, there is no way you have time to focus on your personal priorities in relation to your business.

Mary Marantz [00:20:02]:

Good. No. That's good.

Victoria Rayburn [00:20:05]:

Mary. Okay. I feel like because I've read your book, I want to do all this prefacing before we even we've already gotten into so much meat. But before we get even deeper, I just feel like we got to go over a couple of preface kinds of things just so people really have a good frame of reference for the rest of our conversation. And because I know that so many of our listeners are going to identify with this and that is going to be helpful to them. Can you break down the five achiever types? This was definitely one of those. I listened to it and I went back and I probably read this section of your book a couple of times as well. Just because for me, personally, it's like there are a couple that I really identify with, and it was even more revealing than the Enneagram in some ways.

Mary Marantz [00:20:51]:

Okay, put that on all of the graphics when you release them. Even more revealing than the Enneagram. Heck, yeah, it is. I love that. No, I love the enneagram. I am an enneagram. Four wing three, by the way. What are you?

Victoria Rayburn [00:21:03]:

I'm a three two.

Mary Marantz [00:21:04]:

Nice. Yes.

Victoria Rayburn [00:21:06]:

I feel like a lot of us creative entrepreneurs, small business owners, we hang out between that, like, two, three, four area for the most part.

Mary Marantz [00:21:14]:

Yes, 100%. Okay, so when I was writing Slow Growth I'm going to give you a little fun insider scoop backstory on Slow Growth. Six years before I even had an agent. I guess probably like six years before. Yeah, six years before I had an agent, we'll say. Or six years before I was writing the book. It does. Six years before, we'll just say that.

Mary Marantz [00:21:34]:

Justin and I in our photography business had just gotten incredibly burned out. And we were doing all of these weddings. We were doing all of these magazine shoots for editors and local vendors who wanted to have their dresses photographed, things like that. And we were getting beautiful images, but we were never really the ones steering the ship. Like, it wasn't our vision, it wasn't our timeline. We were forever being rushed on these photo shoots. And so just out of pure sheer exhaustion and desperation of burnout, we put together two shoots. One was in New Haven of a ballerina, and the other we flew a small team of us to Venice, Italy, and we put together, like, four or five looks while we were there.

Mary Marantz [00:22:12]:

And they were purely, for us, purely to just fall in love with this again. We came back, and I think we edited up and shared exactly three images from that whole two day shoot in Venice. And then they just sort of sat on a hard drive and we didn't really know what to do with them. We thought about maybe submitting them. We thought about making, like, a video because we'd done a lot of behind the scenes video, but nothing ever came of it. And so six years go by, and I'm writing Slow Growth, and I'm trying to put words to what it has been like for me to be the woman always performing. And I'm just describing these very visceral scenes. The words are just sort of coming out, talking about, I'm the tightrope walker.

Mary Marantz [00:22:48]:

I'm up and I'm down, and everywhere in between, waiting for the next upswing of a high to catch me just in time. My days have always been defined as good or bad, by the latest good thing that's happened to me. I am the performer. I'm always on my toes. I can never drop the act. I need to show other people how far I've come, but I need to make myself proud, too. I'm the masquerader. I'm hiding in plain sight because I don't want to let anybody down.

Mary Marantz [00:23:10]:

I'm the contortionist, twisting and turning myself up into tiny tethered knots. Because to contort is easier than to be criticized. And I feel like that was for somebody listening right now. Because to contort is easier than to be criticized. Or I'm the illusionist in the distance. I can't even get started because I'm waiting for this perfect version of me off in the future that doesn't exist yet and probably never will. And I think I have to be her before I can actually even start, before I can show up. And so I'm writing the book.

Mary Marantz [00:23:37]:

And we actually had an entirely different layout for this book. It was very preppy, very J. Crew. Very Emily lay, I would say. And I love that style. And it's not on brand for me, but when it came in, it just did not fit. It was like a really cute coat that would look good on somebody else. And so we were back to the drawing board, and I'm just, like, wringing my hands, racking my brain.

Mary Marantz [00:23:59]:

What are we going to do? Like, we're under a deadline. And Justin was the one who said, what if we went Vanity Fair? The way that our photography business was always styled. Like, what if we took inspiration from what our photography website looked like with the blush and the dark charcoal gray, almost black, and the kind of Vanity Fair photos? And as soon as he said that, everybody was instantly like, yes, that. Let's do that. And it also reminded me of these images. For me, my faith is really important to me, and one of those God is in the details. And there was a plan for this book all along. I just realized how much these five different looks lined up exactly with the way I'd already described them in the manuscript of what it's like to be this woman.

Mary Marantz [00:24:41]:

And so we actually have put together a quiz that corresponds to the know that you're introduced throughout the book. I'll just kind of flip for the YouTube folks, by the way. I don't know how bright this we might be a little bright on the exposure. Justin's saying it's not so good, but I'll just kind of flip to a page that's maybe a little darker just to give you kind of a sense of how pretty this book is. But we'll see if you can see that. I'll kind of come closer. Justin's saying no, you cannot. Okay, that's fine.

Mary Marantz [00:25:09]:

Buy the book. You'll find out what I'm talking about. It's beautiful. We put together a quiz that corresponds to the different types. It's. Achieverquiz.com or Marymarans.com quiz, either one will get you there. It takes like two minutes, ten questions, super fast to take. And the results that you get though, they tell you what each type's strengths are, where you get stuck and tripped up, get in your own head, and how you start to move forward with purpose again.

Mary Marantz [00:25:32]:

And I get so many messages, so many emails, so many DMs of people saying, well, I'm sitting here crying my eyes out, Mary, because this two minute quiz just saw into my soul. And it really does. The results really have kind of dialed into what know, people stuck. And so that becomes kind of a framework of like, what's your achiever type? That's how you're going to sort of understand what your slow growth journey looks like. And here's how we move forward.

Victoria Rayburn [00:25:54]:

Yes, guys, I've taken the quiz. It's great, highly recommend, and we will definitely include a link in the show. Like I said, super, super revealing. And I mean, especially again, if you are an achiever by nature, it really helps you understand kind of the why and like Mary said, how you can move forward. Okay, so Mary, I know a lot of people are probably listening and thinking, all right, that sounds great. Slow growth sounds wonderful. However, I still am not really sure what that looks like from a practical level. So I do want to ask, what is the difference between slow growth and being stagnant? And why is it important to have a slow growth mindset? And then also for small business owners and leaders, do they need to hustle before they can embrace slow growth? I know I just threw a lot of questions to ask you, but I think a lot of people, they like the idea of slow growth and maybe they are in a season of burnout or they just know that they cannot work as hard as they have been forever.

Victoria Rayburn [00:26:54]:

So what does slow growth actually mean? And for those again who are afraid of, does this mean I do nothing?

Mary Marantz [00:27:01]:

Because that's obviously not what it means.

Victoria Rayburn [00:27:03]:

So what's the difference between slow growth and being stagnant? Why is that mindset important? And then we can come back to the hustle question a little bit. I'm curious to know your you know.

Mary Marantz [00:27:13]:

I love this question so much because the biggest thing that I want people listening, because I speak to it in a very tender hearted way, because I remember sitting at that taco restaurant and Justin saying, well, that's just not our race to run. And what I heard was, you're not fast enough, you're not good enough. You can't keep up with them. So let's demote ourselves to a different kind of a slower pace. Let's just take a leisurely stroll while everybody else is just like sprinting ahead and winning. And the biggest thing I want you to hear from me is that slow growth does not require or demand or equate to small growth. I feel like my life has sort of been defined. I said this earlier of like we were just like this slow, steady climb.

Mary Marantz [00:27:55]:

Slow, steady climb. But mixed in with that there were these windfall moments. There were these sort of like what the rest of the world could have assumed was an overnight success. For example, when I signed my book deal, it was not for one book or two books. It was actually for five books, which is not very heard of, very common in the author world. And so in many ways that felt like winning the know, getting into Yale for law school, which is the number one law school, is sort of like getting a golden ticket to Willy Wonka's chocolate factory. I have had these moments of windfall. But the thing is, when the rest of the world looks at it and they see, like an overnight success or they see like a sudden where it just feels like you've always been at the top or what have you, that success is actually standing on the firm foundation of years of slow growth that came before.

Mary Marantz [00:28:40]:

If we start to heap spotlights and eyes and responsibilities and things, you're being trusted to steward well onto somebody who has not done the backbone building work of character, they are going to crumble in a second, right? I heard somebody say, like, you will be burned by the spotlight if you haven't gotten that character stuff right. And so do not think that slow growth has to mean you will be small. In fact, I actually have a working theory that some of the giants of any industry get there by taking their time. If you want to get somewhere that matters, go slow, they say. And so when I think about slow growth and I think about it in terms of hustle, and I think about it in terms of the mindset you have to kind of adopt, it is not that you're not going to do important work that matters. I am going to be honest with you. I'm from Appalachia in the 80s. My dad's a logger.

Mary Marantz [00:29:31]:

I have a very strong work ethic. I have a tendency towards being a workaholic. I do have to work really hard to get those priorities right. So this isn't about not doing your part. It isn't about doing good work, the good work that was prepared for you in advance. It's simply about not being impatient. It's simply saying, hey, when this isn't happening as quickly as I want, what can I learn from this? When I see somebody getting something that I want, can I see them as somebody here sent here to make me miserable? Or can I see them as a guide? Somebody a little further up ahead that I can say, okay, what can I learn from their example? What can I learn about what they did that worked, that would work for me? And so I think a lot of it is just sort of not being in such a rush. Because I'm here to tell you, here's what I know about entrepreneurs more than anything in the world.

Mary Marantz [00:30:16]:

If I were a genie in a bottle and I snapped my fingers and I gave you everything that you're wishing for and you had it overnight and now it was just yours and you did nothing to build it yourself with your own two hands, it would not matter to you. It would not mean as much to you as you doing the work, having that patience, stewarding it well, planting the seeds and letting them do the work that they're meant to. I'm talking about all sorts of metaphors right now. I think we've moved from trees to seeds to whatever. But I had a realization not too long ago. When we think about putting seeds in the ground, one of the things you cannot do is go in and tear them open in the hopes of speeding up the process. There has to be this gap, this moment in the darkness before new life bursts forth that you cannot force. This is that moment, that miracle, when something else comes into play.

Mary Marantz [00:31:08]:

And some of the best things that have happened in my life, I did the work, but the result that I got there is a speed worthy Keanu Reeves. It's finished on the map gap between what I could do through my own efforts alone and what actually happened so I could get into a good law school on my own. But I couldn't get into that law school without some sort that that magic that happens in between the planting and the harvest. So be willing to take your time is really what it boils down to.

Victoria Rayburn [00:31:35]:

Oh, man, I love that. You're just full of so much wisdom. So Mary kind of with that in mind, though, and I feel like every business owner has a slightly different opinion on this. But do small business owners and leaders, do they need to hustle before they can embrace slow growth? Or if somebody is starting their business today, is this something that they can do from the get go? I would love to hear your thoughts.

Mary Marantz [00:31:59]:

Well, man, listen, if you're listening and you're like, done, I'm on board. I just started my business and I'm going to do it. Then please do. Please do. But I will say this. My book, Slow Growth, starts off with what I call the inciting incident of Atlast Exhausted. And it's actually a passage that's taken from one of the very last entries of Dirt. So I write that manuscript for Dirt, I hand it off.

Mary Marantz [00:32:20]:

I think I'm done. It's a story about making peace with your past. I'm out. Amazing. And as soon as I handed it off, I felt this message that was you're only sort of halfway there. Like the second half of this journey, you can make peace with your past. But if your present is still prisoner to it, meaning you're still trying to achieve your way away from that story, then you're never truly free. And so that section that is actually originally written in dirt becomes the first entry in slow growth.

Mary Marantz [00:32:48]:

And I say it as an inciting incident, which is a moment plot point episode that thrusts our protagonist into a journey that will leave her forever and utterly changed by the end. This narrative arc kind of catalyst, at Last Exhausted becomes the thing that kicks off slow growth. Because to a certain extent, if you have not experienced, burnout yourself. If you have not run after and chased after these highlight reels and gold stars and these things that you think will finally make you feel enough of something, if you have not gone after the biggest things, had them come true and still not felt like enough, then you won't believe me when I say none of it's. There's never going to be an amount of more that will make you stop. Feeling less than that has to be an inside job. And so it's kind of like when business owners would tell us when we were first getting started, you need to slow down. You're going to burn out.

Mary Marantz [00:33:33]:

And we'd be like, Says you, Grandpa. You don't know how hard we can hustle. And then we became those old, wise, sage business owners saying, you better slow down. You're going to burn out. And they would say, Listen, Grandma, you don't know how hard we can run. So to a certain extent, you have to experience burnout for yourself. You have to know that it's not coasting off to the side of the road, running out of gas, a gentle stop in the gravel. It's like hitting a brick wall 90 miles an hour, and then the transmission falls out, right? That's more like what true burnout feels like.

Mary Marantz [00:34:04]:

In the same way, when I say, grow slow. Take your time. Don't be in such a rush. We, to a certain extent, have to reach our own moment of at last exhausted, breathless and at last exhausted, you lay down and put your face on the cool, hard ground. This death to an old self before a new thing. The thrill of hope takes flight. These chains you have been carrying around you've run so far out into the world only to find yourself back at the beginning this one thought finally running through your mind you can't ignore no matter how hard you run, you can't outrun you. And so we lay there in surrender and we say, all right, I've tried.

Mary Marantz [00:34:40]:

I've tried to find wholeness in these ways the world offers. I've tried to find wholeness in all these things they tell me matter I've tried and accomplished and checked every list on every mark on the list only to see them multiply ten more in their spot and the more that I try to chase the emptier I feel. And so maybe if getting into the number one law school isn't going to do it if getting a book deal isn't going to do it if having our photography business get everywhere I hoped it would one day be if I still am walking around, god set me free of me with this feeling of it's still not enough. Then maybe I have to go back to the beginning and say, what does it look like to do that? Work on the inside, to actually deal with the hole I feel like I'm carrying around in my heart to make peace with this story rather than constantly just trying to fill it with stuff. So 99.9% chance most people are going to have to do that. You're going to have to experience a little bit of that at last, exhausted for yourself. If you're in the 1% who's like, no, don't want to go there. I'm going to listen to you undone.

Mary Marantz [00:35:41]:

Yay, please do that. I'm so happy for you. But for myself and for most people I know, we first have to kind of taste that disappointment. It's like eating a whole bag of marshmallows and wondering why you feel still starving and kind of sick. That's how it is to achieve your way into Worth.

Victoria Rayburn [00:36:01]:

Yes. I would love to say I had enough wisdom know, do things slowly from the get go and have a healthy mindset, but not so. I very, very much relate to that. Mary, this has been a wonderful conversation before we do wrap up this because, you know, small business owners, they are very practical people who like to do lists. So with that in mind and also just in a culture that places so much value on success, how can people practically embrace a slow growth mindset and stop trying to achieve their way into Worth? If they're listening and they're thinking like, all right, tomorrow, tomorrow is the day that slow growth. This is my new goal. This is my new priority. What can they do? Where do they get started other than, of course, reading your book?

Mary Marantz [00:36:51]:

Yes. So reading the book is a great number one, we'll put that out there. Number two, whether you are somebody who has a faith background or not, this is going to be true of every single one of us. The number one way to get out of our own heads, the number one way to stop feeling this rawnervending all the time, is to start serving other people. I talk about in Slow Growth, one of my favorite entries, it's talking about feeling like I have these two versions of me. The first version is calm. She's at peace. She knows what she was put here to do.

Mary Marantz [00:37:24]:

She knows what she's called to do. She knows her gifts. She knows how they are in service to others. And so she just on a daily basis wakes up and says, what do you have for me today. The use of my gifts in service to others for your ultimate glory for the rest of my life. That's it. Unfortunately, that version of me like a nesting doll is inside this whole other version of me that's walking around in the world like one big root canal, like one big rawner vending. Every time the air hits, it sends me railing into fight or flight again.

Mary Marantz [00:37:52]:

And in that entry, it's called insatiable. That version of me is insatiable. It says, that version of me is insatiable. I'm running down the road 100 miles an hour. My hair is on fire and I like the way it burns. And I have so many stacks of sweaters, there could never be enough future perfect versions of me to wear. And so when I think about practical number one, the biggest way to get out of your own head and really and truly how humans were created, for community, for service, for helping others. Like this is science.

Mary Marantz [00:38:22]:

Brain chemicals that are released when we help others. When we see other people helping other people, we are wired to be of service. So figure out how you can use your gifts to start to help others. First and foremost, do that for free. Do that as part of your business even. It doesn't have to always be free, but do that in a way where you start to say, how can I do this? Not because it's good for me, but simply because it will set somebody else into the world with their gifts and their story to go change lives. So that's the first one. And then the second part of that is my coach, Kim Butler, came up.

Mary Marantz [00:38:55]:

We would do like goals setting around this time. Actually, every year she'd come up in December and she has a business called the Whiteboard Room because she would bring a big white poster board. We would do several of them and we would fill out different things. And she'd written my name on the middle, Mary. And we had written out all around it all of the big blinking neon light goals that I'd seen come true that year. And the page is absolutely filled. And I look at her and I say, but I'm the unhappiest I've ever been. And she kind of like takes her hands and she blocks off all the goals, uses her arms to block off all the goals.

Mary Marantz [00:39:30]:

And she hits my name really hard on the table and she says, who is Mary without all of these goals? And I said, I knew in that moment what I was supposed to say. Like, oh, I'm a child of God. I'm loved whatever. And instead, the only thing that came to mind and I just kind of screamed it out was nothing. And her eyes get wide, my eyes get wide. We both look like these emojis. And she said, well, we're going to have to do the work to change that. And so practically, what does it look like for you to walk into a room and not be able to use any of your accomplishments to introduce yourself? What is left if you stripped all of that away? Who is fill in the blank your name without all of these gold stars? What do you bring to the world? What were you uniquely wired with to serve other people and then lean hard into that and get out of your own head by serving other people? It's the only way I have found to get any kind of relief from this achieving screaming in my head.

Victoria Rayburn [00:40:23]:

I love that and I mean that is also, I feel like just so rooted in Christianity as well. And so when you hear things like know, to me it's always just it's not surprising that similar things are in God's word because that's the answer. He gave us the answer. Oh, awesome, Mary. Again, this episode has just been full of so much. You know, I got to fangirl a little bit. I feel like I got to read a great book and then ask the author my questions, which oh man, how lucky am I? But before we do wrap up this episode, where can people find you, connect with you, find your books and your podcast and learn more about the resources and just the many ways you serve small business owners and leaders.

Mary Marantz [00:41:15]:

Yeah, definitely. So for all the photographers listening, sort of the photography side, the photography course side, we have a really amazing lighting course that's like 50 plus modules long. We like to think of it as the only lighting course you'll ever need as well as some posing courses, business courses, things like that. Jmthustore.com you can find all of our photography resources and then on the other side, Marymarans.com is going to be a great hub where from there you can click out to each of the books, slow Growth equals Strong Roots. And my first book, Dirt, you can get over to the podcast. We've had so many amazing episodes. We've had Kathy Lee Gifford on. We just had the Duck Dynasty people on.

Mary Marantz [00:41:54]:

So lauren Elena, country singer. So lots of great episodes. You can check out there and then you can also find the quiz there as well. Or just go to Achieverquiz.com and then it's at Mary Marantz on Instagram. I would love for you to come over and send me a DM after you listen to this episode. Let me know what your type is if you take the Achiever quiz or just let me know something that really spoke to you. Yes.

Victoria Rayburn [00:42:13]:

And guys, we will definitely link to both of Mary's books in the show. Again, highly, highly recommend. I mean, can't even think of how many times I've read a book twice, let alone listen to the audiobook, like for convenience and thinking like, this was not enough. I've got to go back and actually sit down with this. And I also want to say it's like, my intention had been to underline things, but it's just so pretty, I just couldn't bring myself to do it. So we just had to settle for some sticky notes.

Mary Marantz [00:42:39]:

Love that. I love that. Awesome.

Victoria Rayburn [00:42:42]:

Oh Mary, thank you so much for coming on the show. Thank you for the way that you use your experience to serve the small business community and just for reminding people and everything that you do that worth is not found in their workload.