Dear Daughters of God

God's Perfect Plan Lessons From a Life-changing Accident - Ep. 18

• Stephanie Eccles • Season 1 • Episode 18

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God's Perfect Plan: Lessons from a Life-Changing Accident - Dear Daughters of God Ep. 18

Join Stephanie Eccles in Episode 18 of 'Dear Daughters of God,' featuring Jennifer Mosher's inspiring story of resilience and faith. Jennifer shares her journey from a severe car accident that caused traumatic brain injury to her miraculous recovery and finding love later in life. This heartfelt episode brings forth the impact of spiritual faith, family support, and personal determination in overcoming life's immense challenges. The episode also includes insights from Jennifer's mother Loretta and husband Greg, which add depth to this powerful narrative. Stick around until the end for an unexpected venue change, and don’t forget to like and subscribe to stay updated with more uplifting stories.


Thanks for listening! I'm on Instagram as deardaughtersofgod. Follow me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/invites/contact/?i=1iyjqx0cq4kbk&utm_content=qr66nqv

Stephanie:

I am Stephanie Eccles. This is dear daughters of God.

This is Episode 18, God's Perfect Plan, Lessons from a Life Changing Accident.

Microphone (Samson Q2U Microphone)-9:

My name is Stephanie Eccles. I'm a school administrator, natural storyteller, and I am a daughter of God. I tell the stories of our lives from the perspective of the gospel of Jesus Christ. Welcome, Dear Daughters of God. I address you that way because that's what you are to Him. To our Heavenly Father, you are dear.

Stephanie:

Hi friends, it's Stephanie. Be sure to watch the very end of this video because I change venues and it is a big change and you're going to want to see where I end up. So stay with me to the very end I like having you here. So be sure to like and subscribe so you can receive every video. See you soon. we have a guest today. Her name is Jennifer Mosher. Welcome Jennifer.

Jennifer or Greg:

Hi, thank you for having me.

Stephanie:

It is so wonderful to have you here. Jennifer is a dear person in my life and a relative. Let me explain how we're connected. Jennifer is my sister's sister in law, but I like to think of her as My own sister in law, because she lives close to me and she's been having Christmas with my family for probably the last 25 years. We often see Jennifer at Sunday dinners to my children, she's an aunt to me, she's a sister in law. It's so wonderful to have Jennifer join us today. She has an incredible story to share. Before I go any further, Jennifer, I should give your formal introduction then I'll let you do a little more talking. Jennifer Mosher grew up in Minneapolis, Minnesota with her parents and older brother Brent. By the way, Brent married my sister, Kimberly. After Jennifer graduated from high school, she moved to Utah and attended Brigham Young University. Jennifer's parents converted to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter day Saints after the missionaries knocked on their door. Her dad had been reading about food storage and thought it was a great concept practiced by the members of the church. When the LDS missionaries came over, he was excited to talk with them. After five months of discussions, they were baptized. Jennifer was two years old. And Brent was three years old at the time. After graduating from high school, Jennifer did attend Brigham Young University. And she had lots of friends. She was very social, loved learning in her classes. Her goal was to work for a year or two after graduating from BYU, then move to a big city attend graduate school and get married. I live happily ever after that plan was halted just after her junior year and I hear Jennifer giggling on the side because her life didn't turn out that way. Your life definitely did not turn out that way. Jennifer, let's hear more about. The person that, that you were when you were at BYU, when you were going to college, what was happening before that junior year?

Jennifer or Greg:

I loved BYU. I loved high school. I always had a lot of dreams and plans of what I was going to do. I remember in college, even my freshman year, all my friends would have me plan out their college schedules.

Stephanie:

Oh,

Jennifer or Greg:

they were going to take and I picked majors for them and had this energy of planning for your future in life and everything. I just wanted to accomplish everything

Stephanie:

You were the planner.

Jennifer or Greg:

I was the planner.

Stephanie:

You were the planner.

Jennifer or Greg:

And the motivator, I think,

Stephanie:

Oh.

Jennifer or Greg:

of my friends.

Stephanie:

So everyone relied on you for their future plans and you had your plan for your life and your plans for your friends lives.

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah.

Stephanie:

what were you studying at, at, at BYU at the time?

Jennifer or Greg:

My major was with an emphasis in English.

Stephanie:

Okay.

Jennifer or Greg:

to have an, liberal arts undergrad and then go to more specific for graduate school for a while. I wanted to be an art lawyer, like a lawyer for artists. I thought that'd be really cool. then for a while I wanted to go into advertising. I thought it really cool to live in New York city have this like cool job. I could just have all these dreams.

Stephanie:

It sounds fascinating.

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah.

Stephanie:

And I remember you said you went on study abroad. Tell me about that.

Jennifer or Greg:

I took Spanish in high school and through college. I figured if I'm really going to learn Spanish, I need to do a study abroad. I found a great study abroad program at BYU, to Chile.

Stephanie:

Mm hmm.

Jennifer or Greg:

1994, I went to Chile on study abroad. It was fantastic. Like I still remember every moment of it. It was so great. I had so many friends there and I just felt like it was my first time out of the country by myself to a different part of the world. I feel like I learned so much about myself and about how other people live and it was super exciting. I. Get chills thinking about my time there because I loved it so much.

Stephanie:

Oh, you did one and did you have any roommates or that went with you or did you make new friends there?

Jennifer or Greg:

I just made new friends there. We had a few meetings before we went with the were in the program while we were still at BYU. So I met a few people there and then I was put in a house with a couple other women that were on the study brought with me. We all got to be really close. All the people that were on study brought with me. It was so fun. I was so energized after coming home from that

Stephanie:

it sounds like you were a people person.

Jennifer or Greg:

I'm very extroverted I get my energy from being around other people.

Stephanie:

Okay.

Jennifer or Greg:

it.

Stephanie:

Okay.

Jennifer or Greg:

It's a risk taker too. Like I just I'm going to do study abroad and I went by myself I think if I remember right, I took out a student loan so I could pay for it myself,

Stephanie:

so you were ambitious and driven. Yeah.

Jennifer or Greg:

and

Stephanie:

Yeah. Were you doing well in school at Brigham Young University?

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah,

Stephanie:

university.

Jennifer or Greg:

I was the kind of student that did really well in classes that I liked, and that were part of my major, the classes that I didn't like, I probably didn't do as well in, but I was a motivated student that wanted to get my homework done, and it was important to me to do well,

Stephanie:

okay. All right. I get the idea. So you were a junior, you're going into your final year at Brigham Young University, right? And are you home for the summer? And Minnesota is your home, right?

Jennifer or Greg:

I went after Chile. I flew home to Minnesota where I worked for the summer and, hung out with my family and then at the end of August, I drove from Minnesota back to BYU.

Stephanie:

it all changed. How did it all change, Jennifer?

Jennifer or Greg:

A friend of mine from Minnesota, she and I were driving together. My senior year at BYU, she had a family reunion out there. And so we drove my car from Minnesota to Utah. When we hit Nebraska on interstate 80. she was driving at the time, she, I guess she overcracked the car and it rolled five times into the median.

Stephanie:

Oh, oh, oh my, oh my,

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah, I think was told, I don't remember any part of the accident, but what I'm told is that my feet were in the dashboard. And when the car rolled, my feet were in the dashboard and the windows were down,

Stephanie:

huh,

Jennifer or Greg:

when the car rolled, my head, banged against the pavement.

Stephanie:

The pavement, oh!

Jennifer or Greg:

And the grass, like in the, they said it rolled the length of a football field. That's the other thing that we're told too.

Stephanie:

Oh, my,

Jennifer or Greg:

head was like hitting against the ground that whole time. That's when I got a very severe traumatic brain injury, meaning that my brain was flushing back and forth against my skull.

Stephanie:

Oh, my, you're out in nowheresville In relation to your home and Provo,

Jennifer or Greg:

we're But luckily there was a, there was an. I'm again, I don't remember this, but I'm told there's an EMT who happened to be driving behind our car. When it rolled, he knew what to do to stabilize my neck and to not move me. He may have helped me get out of the car. I was unconscious on impact.

Stephanie:

But there's an EMT that helps stabilize your neck.

Jennifer or Greg:

The EMTs helped stabilize my neck. I think he called an ambulance Kimball, Nebraska was the area where we were. I was, driven in an ambulance to Kimball where they stabilized me further in that hospital there. And then after that, they life linked me Scotts Bluff, Nebraska, where I remained for about a month.

Stephanie:

Okay.

Jennifer or Greg:

whole time I was comatose, and the doctor told my parents when they arrived, he said I probably wouldn't make it through the night.

Stephanie:

Oh my, oh my. Okay. So what, injuries did you actually sustain when they got you in the hospital? they had an opportunity to examine your body. What had happened?

Jennifer or Greg:

I think it was C1 and C2, if that means anything to anyone. I got a very severe traumatic brain injury. I have a scar across here to show it, to prove it. And then I broke both femurs. My bone on my left femur was sticking out of my leg. I also broke a couple of toes, but we don't care about the toes at this point.

Stephanie:

They were minor.

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah, they don't care about that

Stephanie:

I'm sure everyone's curious about the driver.

Jennifer or Greg:

she just scratched herself and got, bruises. I think she did sprain her wrist, but

Stephanie:

Okay. Very minor, very minor.

Jennifer or Greg:

but we were very good friends. And so she was, I feel like she was emotionally traumatized at that point. And I was very physically traumatized.

Stephanie:

I see. So they found your parents. they must've called your parents. Tell us about that.

Jennifer or Greg:

yeah, so when they lifelinked me to the hospital in Scottsbluff, Nebraska,

Stephanie:

Yes.

Jennifer or Greg:

I think that my friend, the driver told the nurse my mom's name and they must have looked her up. I don't know how they got hold of my mom because they called her at work

Stephanie:

Oh

Jennifer or Greg:

Miss Mosher, this is Charmaine Stercle from regional West Medical Center in Scotts Bluff, Nebraska. Are you sitting down? And of course, when someone says, are you sitting down? That's the precursor to bad news.

Stephanie:

yeah.

Jennifer or Greg:

she said, we have your daughter has been in a horrible car accident. We have her here at the hospital. She sustained a very severe traumatic brain injury and has two broken femurs and a broken neck. Of course, my mom told me that she screamed and she is in the middle of her office and she screamed and she like beside herself. And

Stephanie:

yeah.

Jennifer or Greg:

ended up driving herself home, some people at her work offered to drive her, but she was freaking out. She said no. She drove herself home somehow she made it home safely. she called my dad from home and he came home, met her at home and they got flights to Nebraska. I think someone must have, I actually don't know the details of this part, but somebody. out that I was a member of the church and called the bishop in Scottscliff, Nebraska, he was able to give me a priesthood blessing and said he felt good about it, and then he picked my parents up at the airport when they arrived. My mom called my brother who was at BYU and this is way before cell phones. So there was no way to get a hold of him. She called my old apartment where I was driving to my roommate would be there first. And she said, can you please go find. Brent, she knew where he lived in Provo, so she drove to the apartment complex saw his car and knocked on the door his roommate answered the door, and she said, Is Brent home? And he said, Oh, he just giggled Oh, Brent, you got visitors already. My brother came down and she said, your sister's been in a car accident, I was supposed to find you. He just thought Oh, she's in a car accident. He didn't know that I was going to be so traumatically injured,

Stephanie:

Right.

Jennifer or Greg:

home with mom and dad and they told him what happened. And then he, a flight to Nebraska also flew there. And then the Bishop from the ward picked him up. And I guess he was the first one there in Nebraska and then. parents met him there.

Stephanie:

I understand you had stitches across the entire length of your head

Jennifer or Greg:

Yep,

Stephanie:

because your head was shaved

Jennifer or Greg:

I had my head shaved. I had a scar that goes all the way around like this.

Stephanie:

So you were in that hospital for how long?

Jennifer or Greg:

So I was in Scottsbluff, Nebraska for about one month, just under one month. I'm told that I was comatose for Just under four weeks.

Stephanie:

At first your parents are told, we're not sure if Jennifer will make it through the night

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah. The doctor told my parents that first couple nights we're not sure she's going to make it through the night. Her injuries are still severe. They didn't know how I was going to recover. And they also said if she does recover, she probably won't go back to school, back to BYU.

Stephanie:

because of the brain injury.

Jennifer or Greg:

They didn't know if I'd walk again, if I survived,

Stephanie:

oh, what a horrible experience to go through.

Jennifer or Greg:

The good thing is I don't remember anything from this part.

Stephanie:

Yeah.

Jennifer or Greg:

memory of

Stephanie:

Yeah.

Jennifer or Greg:

I started remembering things. So I was also flown, after I got out of the hospital in Nebraska, back to a hospital in Minneapolis.

Stephanie:

Huh.

Jennifer or Greg:

rehabilitation hospital people with brain injuries. It's called Sister Kenny Institute. It's really close to where my parents were living, where my home was at that time. So able to, stay there and do a lot of, therapy. With speech and occupational therapists and physical therapists and stuff. And I had a neurologist seeing me and everything and was there for about two more months.

Stephanie:

when you were in Nebraska, how did your parents, find peace? What, did they do to help them through that time?

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah, so Scotts Bluff, Nebraska is a pretty small place. And like I told you, the bishop had picked my parents up from the airport and the ward there was like so supportive. They were amazing. Like they, my parents got to be really close with everyone in the ward they, Had them over for dinner. They did all the things that as members of the church, we do to serve like, Oh, someone's in hospital, let's bring them meals. Someone's, so we they get dinners all the time and people would come visit me in the hospital. My mom they, one, she had one friend there who she met at church who would go walk with her every morning. It's the hospital. She'd meet her there and they'd go for walks and stuff.

Stephanie:

Oh, nice. Okay.

Jennifer or Greg:

a lot of support, a lot of support. I actually ended up talking to the bishop of that ward later on, and he told me my experience, my injury helped their ward grow closer together too, because they were all focused on helping one person.

Stephanie:

Huh. Ah,

Jennifer or Greg:

cool.

Stephanie:

yes. Yes. The blessings of service. Yes.

Jennifer or Greg:

it's real.

Stephanie:

I remember hearing about your parents, looking to your patriarchal blessing for direction. Tell us about that. That

Jennifer or Greg:

So my parents told me that they decided to look at my patriarchal blessing to see if there's anything about she's going to be in a car accident or she's going to be injured or something like that. And what they read was that, through your faith, you'll be able to perform miracles. my mom told me they hoped and they had faith that would be one of the miracles is that I would survive. one of the in Scottsbluff told my mom that she'd seen two miracles walk out of the room that I was in and she really felt like I was gonna be the third.

Stephanie:

ah, and you were, you walked, well, you didn't walk out of that room, but, but

Jennifer or Greg:

walk out, but I'm walking now.

Stephanie:

Yes. Yeah. Yeah. So Jennifer, you, you've been in the hospital for three months and you're out of the hospital. What happens to you when you're out of the hospital? What, what is life like at this point?

Jennifer or Greg:

The accident was in August and I got out of the hospital in November. It was like a Thanksgiving gift because it, I got out of the hospital like, I think November 23rd. So it's like this big Thanksgiving miracle. then I spent Christmas, It was like family. And then I actually decided to go back to school back to BYU. In the spring or summer. So

Stephanie:

that you were well enough to go back.

Jennifer or Greg:

it's like I was well enough, but I now in retrospect, I probably wasn't, but I thought it was. And I, you know, my parents are just, you know, So supportive. And when I'm like, yeah, I want to go back to school. So like, okay, you know, we didn't know. So then they had a, I had a lot of support at school since I already completed three years of college. And I had so many friends and we had family friends lived out there. I just, I don't know. I guess you're here now in Utah. we felt okay about sending me. I did it.

Stephanie:

out for you?

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah, I mean, it was hard. Like, I felt, like I was used to, like we talked about before, I was used to like, going places and doing things and staying out late and, and, you know, living the college life. But I just, I felt, I almost felt like a little kid in an adult body.

Stephanie:

Oh.

Jennifer or Greg:

And I, it was hard to walk. It was hard. I just felt like, The best way to describe traumatic brain injury for me is to have, is it's like your head is right here and your brain is over here. Your brain and your head are not connected. And so you always feel like out of sorts. And that's how I felt all the time.

Stephanie:

Interesting.

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah.

Stephanie:

your head is here and your brain is over here.

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah.

Stephanie:

Interesting. And

Jennifer or Greg:

I felt like that on top of the fact that I felt like I was a little kid, like, I felt like a, I almost felt, I think I almost talked like I was, I couldn't remember like words. I, talked like I was, you know. And like I was a young person, I didn't, I didn't, I don't feel like it acted like I was 21 year old college student, you know, but

Stephanie:

right.

Jennifer or Greg:

it's all in retrospect.

Stephanie:

Yes. Yes. Your brother was back at

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah.

Stephanie:

with you, Brent.

Jennifer or Greg:

helps a lot because we actually had the same undergraduate major and so we had took some classes together and he could, he helped me a lot and, you know, taking notes and reviewing what my for my classes and everything. And since I had already completed so much and it was already advanced in my major, I had, I knew a lot of teachers there and a lot of the professors are very, BYU was great. There are a lot of support and they helped me and it ended up being a really great experience

Stephanie:

And you were able to graduate.

Jennifer or Greg:

Yep, I graduated and my brother and I walked together. So, because we had the same major and he had taken, he took two years off for his mission. He's 18 months older than I am, but he took two years off for his mission and then Like a semester off for when I had the injury the accident and so we're able to graduate and walk together So it was really cool for my parents to see.

Stephanie:

That is so neat. The two

Jennifer or Greg:

it's cool.

Stephanie:

together.

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah So then I when I end up graduating and I moved back to Minnesota Well, actually I went back to Minnesota and then I Decided to move back to Provo to be with some of my peers at that point, and then I got this great idea to go teach English in China.

Stephanie:

Oh,

Jennifer or Greg:

for three or four months, and that was really hard and taxing on my brain, but I did it, then I moved back to Minnesota and. I ended up getting a full time job and all this is like, like I think back and I'm just like, Oh my gosh, how am I still alive from doing all that? Because with the TBI, you're just so tired and so like, everything is hard. Walking was hard. It's like taxing to bend down and tie your shoes. It's just like, and I was trying to like be independent and do the things that I had always expected to do. It was just hard. Really, really hard.

Stephanie:

to go teach English in China and walking, and I guess managed that adventure. right.

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah, I guess so. Luckily I was smart enough to like, not do certain things, like not travel to, I didn't go, a lot of my friends went to other countries. In the orient and I didn't do that with them because I knew it would be too much too taxing for me to like travel anywhere else. So,

Stephanie:

I see. see. All right. So, so then after you finished teaching English in China, you moved to Utah eventually.

Jennifer or Greg:

yeah, my friend, a friend of mine from Minnesota, she decided to move to Utah and we are in the same singles ward in Minnesota. And so I was like, she decided to move with her mission companions family in Utah. And then, we are talking and she and I decided, like. I felt like I should move to Utah because I just, I'd gotten actually laid off from my job in Minnesota and I didn't, I just needed an, I, like you talked about before, I'm a planner. I need like something to look forward to. And so I just decided like, Oh, I'll move to Utah. that's a good thing to do. I've lived there before I can move to Utah. so I just, I came out and visited and stayed with, with, Your parents actually invested. And I knew that since my brother and sister in law had lived in Utah, that they would come or they met in Utah, they would, and her family was there. They would come back and forth a lot. And so I just, I called, I came to visit Utah, made some friends and I felt really good about it. And my friends and I found an apartment. And so I called my dad and I go, I I'm going to move to Utah. And so I flew home, sold my condo, sold my car and my. My cute dad drove me out to Utah. So, and that was that. And I decided I, I would just take it easy here. Make it be, get a part time job, let my brain heal, do what I can to just not do so many things, just be more realistic about what I could handle. And I thought I'd stay here for, in Utah for three to five years. And those three to five years turned into like, 17 years and I ended up talking with one of my old writing professors at BYU and she convinced me to write. She's like, have you written your story? And I said, I've been thinking about it. And so I, she helped me and I wrote a book about my experience called the smile on my forehead memoir of the life of the traumatic brain injury. And that was really healing for me to write everything down and to record it. And I'm really glad I had that. Cause I read it now and I'm just like, wow, went through a lot.

Stephanie:

Oh, let's show that book. Let's show

Jennifer or Greg:

You

Stephanie:

Okay. There it is. There it is. A smile.

Jennifer or Greg:

it on my website, which is jennifermosher. com, or you can also search it on Amazon, the smile on my forehead.

Stephanie:

All right. All right. so glad you wrote this book. Also, I've learned so much from it. I was touched by your first work experience at United Way.

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah, my first job out of college is at United Way, which is really cool. So,

Stephanie:

Yeah. Okay. So, so you're in Utah. You've been, here quite some years at this point. what about your social life? Are you dating?

Jennifer or Greg:

yeah, I mean, As any other single LDS woman, older woman will tell you, it's like dating is not a piece of cake.

Stephanie:

Yeah.

Jennifer or Greg:

hard to meet people, even though it's easy to meet people, but it's hard to like date people down this time period. And so, I mean, yeah, I, dated, I tried really hard to go to different social events and meet people and you I'm really good at making friends, like I've made, I have a lot of friends and but it's harder to meet like people that you, to have like dating relationships with. So when I got online, that's like the way to meet people now. So I have, I had like three, three different dating profiles.

Stephanie:

Three different dating profiles.

Jennifer or Greg:

I've been in, if there's a dating, dating website. Promise I've been on it.

Stephanie:

Oh, okay. Okay. And, how were those dating profiles working for you?

Jennifer or Greg:

I've been on a lot of dates like, but they don't go anywhere. so at one point I decided to really like be specific about my dating profile and I literally wrote, this is the kind of person that I am. This is the kind of person that I want. If you are this kind of person, let's see if it can match.

Stephanie:

Oh,

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah.

Loretta:

Jennifer, Were you really wanting a relationship? Because I know you're a very independent person. You had a lot of terrific friends. what were your feelings about wanting a relationship with a man?

Jennifer or Greg:

So I, I wanted a relationship, but I didn't want just any relationship Like dating is a full time job it's like taxing anyways. On top of that. And I just, I get like, I get sick of like, I like dating cause I like meeting new people, but I get, but I was sick of it you get to a point where you, You want to meet the one, like the right person and, and not date anymore,

Stephanie:

It does sound taxing, just like hard work.

Jennifer or Greg:

it's hard work. Yeah.

Stephanie:

Like to bring your mom Loretta on who I consider an additional mother in law

Jennifer or Greg:

yeah.

Stephanie:

because I know that this was an important part of her life. Thank you for joining Loretta. officially is my sister's mother in law, but just like Jennifer, Loretta lives close to me, we spend many Sunday dinners together and Christmases together. And she's an additional grandparent to my children and. And an additional mother in law to me, Loretta. I love you. So glad you're here. Thank you for joining.

Loretta:

I you too, Stephanie.

Stephanie:

Okay. Loretta, you, you have played the most significant role in Jennifer's life. After this accident we are talking about dating and Jennifer's in the recovery part of her accident. She's now moved back to Utah. But, to be fair, I, I want to ask you one question first as her mother, because I know it really affected how you approached. This whole recovery with Jennifer and that was tell us about your approach to mothering Jennifer and Brent. how did you approach mothering them? Okay.

Loretta:

the best, you know, we were happy as a family, my brothers and sisters, I thought. But I, I a very low self esteem and as I grew, grew up and especially as I got into high school, I became insecure about everything, my body, my looks, everything, and I did not want that to be passed on to my kids. There was a lot of shame involved. I remember telling Jennifer. You know, about the shame and she's, well, how, how do you know you're not going to pass it on to us? And I said, well, I probably am passing something on, but at least you're, I'm telling you about it. So that was the way we grew up. but I didn't want to ever show anger at them. Brent or Jennifer, and I didn't want them to ever feel that I was disappointed in them and anything that they had done. because of that, I held back a lot, which was probably unhealthy. I didn't talk to them as much as I probably should have because I was afraid that I would say something wrong. Anyways, that's a little bit of that stuff.

Stephanie:

so, Loretta, just, just to make sure I understand, as, a daughter of an alcoholic, you felt the shame like, so many children of alcoholics do and you were part of Al Anon, is that right?

Loretta:

Yes,

Stephanie:

and so you felt like the answer to, for your children not feel the shame that you felt as a child was not let them see you be angry or disappointed at all. So you, you held back those feelings altogether, which kept you from doing some, some open communication, but you felt like that was best.

Loretta:

yes,

Stephanie:

wanted their lives to be perfect.

Loretta:

yes,

Stephanie:

that right? so much.

Loretta:

yes,

Stephanie:

We wanted their lives to be perfect. Okay. And then came this accident,

Loretta:

yes,

Stephanie:

And, and there goes perfection.

Loretta:

goes perfection,

Stephanie:

There goes perfection. There goes.

Loretta:

very

Stephanie:

Okay. So, that's the background.

Loretta:

Yes,

Stephanie:

now we're to the point that Jennifer has recovered very, very well. She's living in Utah and she's dating and the two of you are, are close at this time. Right?

Loretta:

yes,

Stephanie:

Yes. Tell it, about that. Silence. Silence.

Loretta:

Yeah, it was kind of down, and she was always looking, looking to have someone that she would, she said, either fall in love with or fall in love with her. so my part was because Jennifer and I were very close and talking all the time, I wanted her to have somebody so bad. And I would pray every night I would pray to God, I'd say, please, please, please, when I went to bed. Please. Please, please send her somebody. Please, please, please. And Jennifer would get embarrassed if I would tell her this, cause she's very independent. She's not a needy person, was making my neediness come out. I don't know how long that went on. Seemed like it went on forever. But then one night I thought, I had learned this to Alan that if you turn your power over to God. He'll take the things from you. And

Stephanie:

Huh. Huh.

Loretta:

bad. And all of a sudden it, it left, it left like a, like a cloud and I didn't feel that anxiety anymore. And the next night that I prayed, I didn't have the anxiety. I still prayed, but I wasn't begging him. And it wasn't too long after that. I'm not sure how long, but almost, would call, call me and she says, mom, well, I met this guy on match. com. This was during and she says, I think I like him. you know, that's a first. And and then you know, it just went on for there. And she said, he's an English major, which is something that she wanted. and then. it just progressed and she married a wonderful guy that was one experience that I had with the spiritual thing while she was in her accident. But at one other time is I used to go every morning that I would go to see her at the hospital in Nebraska, I would always comb my hair because it always made me feel better to. Have my hair combed and I was looking in the mirror and all of a sudden this fleeting thing went through my mind Jennifer and Brent graduating together and so that's another thing that I hung on to that God was giving me a message and that's exactly what happened.

Stephanie:

the two of them graduated together. Yes.

Loretta:

yeah There's

Stephanie:

Yeah.

Loretta:

miracles that she brought into our life.

Stephanie:

Yes. Oh, that was, that was a very special personal revelation you received. Yeah.

Loretta:

Yes, it was And

Stephanie:

you have let the cat out of the bag, Loretta. Jennifer, tell us about this man that came around and during COVID

Jennifer or Greg:

So in March of 2020, I had rewritten my, dating profiles and my friend actually had met. A man, she'd been dating on match. com and I had been on that one before. And it's like, when she told me that, I was like, Oh, I'll get on that one again. And so I, I'd use my really specific profile. Like, this is who I want. This is the type of person I am. And I made like a one, two, three list of what I'm like. And I said, if you are this kind of person, maybe we'll match.

Stephanie:

you laid it out. I

Jennifer or Greg:

I laid it out. I laid it out. Like.

Stephanie:

okay.

Jennifer or Greg:

And

Stephanie:

more guessing.

Jennifer or Greg:

it was COVID. I remember sitting on my couch and getting on match. com. And I had a message from this one person who said that he liked what I had written on my profile. And he said, those same things are important to me. we started chatting. we talked on the phone a couple of times because it was covid. after a few weeks, we actually met in person, but we met at a park like, kept 6 feet apart because, like I said, it was covid

Stephanie:

We've got to keep six feet

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah. Yep. We have a 60 apart. I found out that he was a English undergraduate English major and I actually had made a list of what I wanted. And one of those things was, I want someone that's a liberal arts major like me. he is a liberal arts major, I didn't write this in my profile, of course, but I told myself that I really wanted someone who knew what it was like to have a traumatic health experience because, or to overcome something like that, because that's the only way that I knew that that he'd be able to understand me and I'd be able to understand him. And as it turns out, this person was a liver transplant recipient eight months before we met. which is really cool. so we met in March of 2020 and April 17th of 2021, we got married.

Stephanie:

one year later. Oh, are we going to hear his name?

Jennifer or Greg:

Oh, his name is Greg Gosling.

Stephanie:

Greg?

Jennifer or Greg:

name is officially now Jennifer Gosling, I took my, my wedding rings off

Stephanie:

Oh,

Jennifer or Greg:

because when I was talking, I don't want to give it away, but

Stephanie:

Yes. We want to see the ring.

Jennifer or Greg:

I'm married and married for, yeah, we've been married for,

Stephanie:

it up close like this and put your hand. There you go. That's it. There you go. Oh, that's good. Yeah. Oh, that's beautiful.

Jennifer or Greg:

we've been married for three and a half years.

Stephanie:

Ah. Oh, we want to meet him. Loretta, tell us what you love about Greg.

Loretta:

I love him because he's, likes my hugs. Oh, he's very genuine.

Stephanie:

we can tell you love him, Loretta.

Loretta:

him.

Stephanie:

We see Jennifer and Greg. Greg, welcome to Dear Daughters of God.

Jennifer or Greg:

Thank you.

Stephanie:

you're here with us.

Jennifer or Greg:

Pleasure to be here. Well,

Stephanie:

so you know, it's all been good. It's all, it's all been good. All right. we're all curious, which characteristics or personality traits drew you towards Jennifer? Tell us what, what, was it about her that drew you towards her?

Jennifer or Greg:

you just mentioned the word genuine, and Jennifer is very transparent. She is 100 percent herself, doesn't try to be anyone else. She's got a very positive energy, and she's very motivational.

Stephanie:

Oh, Yes. I see all, all of those characteristics in Jennifer. I agree with you. Yes. Yes. what a great person to live with. Yes. Greg, when,

Jennifer or Greg:

You

Stephanie:

with Jennifer forever? And, and, did you let on to it? Did you let her know? Or did you keep that secret for a while? Tell us about that.

Jennifer or Greg:

I think that's a great question, and I don't recall a specific moment in time when I realized it, but looking back at our our courtship when we were dating I just remember feeling very calm and the word I've used to describe it when, you know, Jennifer and I have talked about it is, Our relationship grew very organically. It felt very natural. It just felt like we were a natural fit for each other. I don't think that it took very long before we both realized. That we wanted to get married. Like, I don't know that it was a secret that I was keeping. We were pretty much in agreement about it. And, and that also felt just very natural. There was a flow to it.

Stephanie:

Okay.

Jennifer or Greg:

One thing that I liked about Greg is I didn't, from all the other guys, they dated, I was always wondering like, do they really like me or what do they like about me or whatever, but with Greg, I just felt that he liked me. Like from the very beginning, I was like, he, this guy likes me. Like he likes what I like about myself. He likes those things too. And so that's what made it really easy. really, really easy. There was, there's never been any kind of like adjustment or it just feels like I even tell him all the time. Like, I can't believe that. I was happy before I met you. I know I was, but like, I'm just like, how, how could I have not been married? Like, this seems like, so the way it's supposed to be, it's good.

Stephanie:

that's an ideal relationship. Yes.

Jennifer or Greg:

wait until you're 47 to get married, it better be good. Cause you don't, yeah,

Stephanie:

Yes. Yes. Okay. I, it, it must've left you feeling so very comfortable, Jennifer, that feeling of that. He just naturally liked you just the way you were. That must've been So comforting, especially especially after all that dating fiasco you went through.

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah.

Stephanie:

Yes.

Jennifer or Greg:

I feel like I got to quit that full time job of dating.

Stephanie:

Right. Right. Well, now that you've been married these three and a half years, what do you like even more about each other who, you know, whoever wants to go? I'd like to hear from both of you, but, but what is it that you like even more about each other now that you know each other better?

Jennifer or Greg:

I feel like it's all I like the things that I liked at first They're just deeper now and stronger

Stephanie:

Okay.

Jennifer or Greg:

I feel like he's my you know There's that movie that says you complete me And I feel like he completes me and makes me yeah, I just feel very understood like you said, I'm always myself. I've always been myself, even in other dates, but I don't feel any other person I dated liked me when it, for being myself, I had friends, that liked me for being myself. not like husband material. Greg does the dishes when he's supposed to. He like, we take turns doing this. He takes out the garbage. He just, he does things. That I used to do myself I remember when he first, got married he's like, you don't have to do everything by yourself anymore, Jennifer, because I used to, I was independent. I did everything I have to Google how to fix my garbage disposal. I'd have to, you know, all those things and take out the garbage on my own. I mean, that's like a little thing, but it's just nice to have a companion that helps you do stuff. we enjoy being around each other too.

Stephanie:

Oh, Yes. What a wonderful compliment.

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah, we, yeah.

Stephanie:

Yeah. Greg, well, what, would you say about Jennifer? Okay.

Jennifer or Greg:

Well, I continue to appreciate that Jennifer is transparent and genuine. Around the time we started dating, I was really getting into journaling and I had written down something that Jennifer said, an opinion of some kind. And I thought even a couple of years later, Jennifer would have said the same thing, like she is still the same person. But what I've come to really appreciate about Jennifer is not just about her, but also her family is that they are extremely loving and accepting of everyone. And that is just so powerful. I'm, I'm convinced that the parents love for their children. Tom and Loretta's love for Jennifer is part of why she's so healthy now. I'm amazed at her recovery after having such serious injuries. So the love and acceptance is just I've really continued to appreciate that.

Stephanie:

Ah, ah, Loretta, you did it right. You did it right, Loretta.

Loretta:

it right, do it or not, huh?

Stephanie:

Look at that.

Loretta:

I love them so much and Jennifer and Greg are perfect. Greg is like another son.

Stephanie:

Jennifer, you had a scripture that, we haven't shared. Okay. This is in Ether chapter 12, verse six. And now I Moroni would speak somewhat concerning these things. I would show unto the world that faith is things which are hoped for and not seen. dispute not because ye see not, for ye receive no witness until after the trial of your faith.

Jennifer or Greg:

During my recovery, I thought a lot about that scripture in Ether 12 6 that like faith is things which are hoped for but not seen. And I thought just as I was dating, I thought of that and like, well, if I keep dating, then I'll meet someone and get married. But I, I was 45, 46 years old. So I really thought like, I just kind of missed the boat. I remember thinking, I guess that scripture doesn't apply to me, but I can't be too picky because I've survived this great injury, and I, I've been blessed in so many different ways, and so I can't expect too much from Heavenly Father, and I didn't want to settle for anyone that I didn't truly love. So it's like, well, at least I'm happy by myself and I'll, I'll be okay, you know, so, but then as it says, as you read further in that scripture, it says it's after the trial of your faith that you see the, the result of your faith.

Stephanie:

Right.

Jennifer or Greg:

So, I guess I had to struggle through all that online dating and all that time passed without having Greg in my life. And. I just still kept on and I kept, my mom and I both kept praying for someone and I didn't settle for anyone. I kept dating. I never gave up. And it came true. Like I met my match. And there's, yeah, it's wonderful.

Stephanie:

right. was out there.

Jennifer or Greg:

He was out there. He was there. He just had to be in the right position to meet me and I had to be in the right position to meet him.

Stephanie:

Yes,

Jennifer or Greg:

Yeah.

Stephanie:

yes.

Jennifer or Greg:

It just, I guess for me, it's like, I think I was remiss in thinking that I didn't want to expect too much from Heavenly Father because that was what was promised in my patriarchal blessing.

Stephanie:

Mm-hmm

Jennifer or Greg:

I don't know who I was to think that Heavenly Father couldn't come through for me, but he did. It took longer than I thought, but

Stephanie:

right. but it did happen. Yeah. Loretta, what, what did you wanna say?

Loretta:

being Jennifer mentioned her patriarchal blessing, can I mention one thing that Heavenly Father That you would meet somebody

Jennifer or Greg:

Yep. somebody you love as much as you yourself

Stephanie:

Oh,

Loretta:

say how awesome you are,

Stephanie:

yes. Yeah. Yes. ah, Earlier Jennifer and I we're talking you said to me, Jennifer, that even 30 after the accident, you feel like even now just getting back to that Jennifer was, the person before the accident.

Jennifer or Greg:

I feel like, you know, I finally got in full circle. Yeah. Yeah.

Stephanie:

come full circle that it's taken this long and others, wouldn't see that. They would have said, Oh no, that happened years ago, but only you would know that because you're living with you and you knew the Jennifer age 20 that you were it was Dr. White that wrote the Forward Jennifer's book, and he quotes about traumatic brain injuries. He says that there are 1.4 million Americans each year that are affected by traumatic brain injury and approximately 230,000 are hospitalized and 30,000 die.

Jennifer is one of those, and her recovery is a miracle. It has been wonderful to have Jennifer and Loretta and Greg with us today.

Stephanie:

Get ready. We're about to make that transition. Here we go.

Stephanie test:

Hello, Since Jennifer's interview, I've had the opportunity to travel to the beautiful island of Kauai in Hawaii, and it's given me an opportunity to think about the interview with Jennifer and just reflect on her life and all the people that she has influenced from her family and friends to her clients, the children she works with, and it's reminded me that heavenly father. Does not get in the way of mortality. He has this eternal perspective knowing the end from the beginning, and he lets mortality play out because His work is to bring, to pass the immortality and eternal life of man, meaning mankind. So he has our resurrected life in mind, not our short life here on this earth, but the eternal life in mind. there is this beautiful sermonette that was given in October, 2024 by Brooke p Hales of the 70 in the Church of Jesus Christ from Latter-Day Saints General Conference. And it's called Mortality Works, and it explains this very concept so well. He talks about, ministering to an older woman whose life was very hard. where you might say just like Jennifer's, oh, why did it happen to her? After this older woman passed away, one of her sons was blessed with a beautiful spiritual experience while in the temple, and his mother helped him understand that the hardships that happened to her, that she understood, and that they were Okay, and that mortality works now that you understand that much I'm going to read this little bit to you Quote, Nine months after her passing, one of her sons had a remarkable experience in the temple. He learned by the power of the Holy Ghost that his mother had a message for him. She communicated with him, but not by vision or audible words. The following unmistakable message came into the son's mind from his mother. Quote, I want you to know. I want you to know that mortality works, and I want you to know that I now understand why everything happened in my life the way it did, and it is all okay. unquote. This message is all the more remarkable when one considers her situation and the difficulties the sister endured and overcame, and we can think of Jennifer's life and the difficulties she overcame. Elder Hale goes on to say, brothers and sisters, mortality works. It is designed to work despite the challenges, heartaches, and difficulties we all face our loving, wise and perfect. Heavenly Father has designed the plan of happiness such that we are not destined to fail. His plan provides a way for us to rise above our mortal failures. The Lord has said, this is my work and my glory To bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man. Nonetheless, if we are to be the beneficiary of the Lord's work and glory, even mortality and eternal life, we must expect to be schooled and taught and to pass through the refiner's fire, sometimes to our utter limits. To completely avoid the problems, challenges, and difficulties of this world would be to side step the process that is truly necessary for mortality to work And so we should not be surprised when hard times come upon us. We will encounter situations that try us and people who enable us to practice true charity and patience. But we need to bear up under our difficulties and remember as the Lord said, quote, and who so layeth down his life in my cause for my name's sake. shall find it again, even life eternal." This relates to the title. that I chose for this episode, God's Perfect Plan. At first you might think, what on earth are you talking about, God's Perfect Plan with Jennifer's life? But it was only because God's Perfect Plan happens because of God's perfect plan. perspective, his eternal perspective. His perspective is us in the resurrected life. he knows that we need, experience and intelligence that will prepare us for that resurrected life. in Doctrine and Covenants section 130 verses 18 through 19, it talks about the intelligence that we gain here in this life through experience and what it means in our resurrected life, it says, quote, whatever principle of intelligence we attain unto in this life, it will rise with us in the resurrection. And if a person gains more knowledge and intelligence in this life through his diligence and obedience, than another, he will have so much the advantage in the world. to come. So it's about trying to gain a perspective a little bit more like our Heavenly Father's perspective, an eternal perspective. Like the prophet, President Nelson said, think celestial. I am so thrilled that Jennifer joined us today and shared her story with us. And I'm grateful to have heard from Loretta and Greg. And thank you to all of you for joining us for now. I will say farewell until we meet again.