Pamela Lewis On Craft, Grit, And Gig Life

A guest mic at her brother’s wedding turned into a career. That’s the spark Pamela Lewis chases across this fast, funny, and deeply honest conversation about craft, persistence, and finding meaning on and off the bandstand. We go from the Floral Terrace first-dance rehearsal where she landed a job offer, to years of calling bandleaders until a spot opened, to the reality of singing in a 10-piece unit where six vocalists juggle egos, schedules, and the pressure to sound effortless under fluorescent lights.

Pamela opens up about nodules, quitting cigarettes, and learning to support her voice. She breaks down why dinner-theater improv sharpened her timing, how high school chorus wired her ear for harmonies, and why the banquet staff’s thank-yous often mean more than the guest who says “you sound just like the record.” There are war stories—flambe timing jokes during Viennese hour, a bandstand near-brawl, introductions gone painfully wrong—and there’s the quieter truth of feeling invisible while making a room move. Through it all, she keeps the bar high, arguing that owning an instrument isn’t the same as honoring a craft.

We also dig into originals with guitarist John Hurley—Secret Language, Dreams Come True, and a batch of unreleased Nashville cuts—and why it’s time to get them out into the world for sync opportunities. Pamela shares the heart behind her cabaret work, from Family History and The Dog Walking Diva to Daddy’s Little Girl, which won a BroadwayWorld award. Her next show, Unapologetic, celebrates her mother with story and song, a reminder that the most personal material often lands the deepest.

If you love real talk about gig life, harmony nerdery, and the tension between paying work and personal art, you’ll feel right at home. Hit play, then share this with a musician who needs a nudge. If the episode moved you, leave a review, follow the show, and tell us your favorite bandstand war story or the moment music made you feel seen.

Transcript

Meet Pamela And The Origin Story

SPEAKER_00 0:07

29. That's my age.

SPEAKER_03 0:11

Alright, this is episode 29 of On Drums. I'm John Simeone. Today I have Pamela Lewis. Not not Pam or Pammy, it's Pamela. I do like Pammy, Pamela. You should be Pam Alala. Pamela. Because you're a singer. Right. Okay. So Pam and I um How do we know each other now? Too long.

SPEAKER_00 0:34

Way too long.

SPEAKER_03 0:34

Fifty years or some shit. Fifty years.

SPEAKER_00 0:36

I think fifty-two years.

SPEAKER_03 0:38

No. No, but seriously, what year was it that we met?

SPEAKER_00 0:41

Um oh man, I meant to ask my brother um what year he got married because that's what I mean.

SPEAKER_03 0:47

You the way the way Pam and I met was on a a gig that w she wasn't on, you were a guest.

SPEAKER_00 0:54

I was a guest at my brother's wedding.

SPEAKER_03 0:56

Okay, that's what it was.

SPEAKER_00 0:57

And my brother, he's a hard worker and he has a big ass, and he likes to get the best of the biggest. Physical physical big ass? Yeah. I mean, he doesn't have a big ass, but he's a very he's very tall. He's six foot six. Um and I'm only five two, and I would yell at my mother all the time. I'm like, come on, man, you could just give me one more inch. Um but so he he likes to have the best in life. And uh and he hired the best band, and that was Code Blue.

SPEAKER_01 1:21

Oh, Code Blue.

SPEAKER_00 1:22

And he met with Sean and Donna and said, um my little sister's gonna sing the first dance, first you know, first song. And they were like, mm, okay.

SPEAKER_03 1:32

Right. And so right, and so that's how we met you. And you know what you don't know about that night? That specific night, we had a little fight in the band. Ooh, tell me. Yeah, I remember because Drew had just started in the band.

SPEAKER_00 1:44

No. Because Shrek was the No, Derek was there? Yeah. Oh yeah, yeah. Mm-hmm. And so was Dave um Anton.

SPEAKER_03 1:53

No.

SPEAKER_00 1:54

No. Dave um Siegel. What? Where was the gig? The gig was at the floral terrace. Wasn't it at the top of some No, it was at the Floral Terrace, and I meant to ask my brother when he got married. It has to be twenty-five years ago.

SPEAKER_03 2:10

Okay. All right. So well, whatever. Twenty six? I see, see, I'm losing my mind. I don't even know. Well. I don't even know. I've tried to block all that stuff. I know, me too. No, no, no. So, okay, so that's where we met you, and then you joined the b you joined the band.

SPEAKER_00 2:22

Well, I I met I met you guys in the cocktail hour to to rehearse the first dance, which was um Shania Twain's Still Don't Wanna. He only wanna dream. Right. So we finished the song, and I'll never forget it. Sean turned to me and said, Are you looking for a job? And I said, Yes I am. So, and that's how and he didn't he didn't have a spot for me right away because you know he he back then we had um Top Shelf, Rhapsody, um, Skyline, and Code Blue in that in Skyline Orchestras. Yeah. And uh he didn't have a spot for me right away. And I called him like every two weeks for like two years.

SPEAKER_03 3:05

Really? Yep. Yep. But Shell was in the band.

SPEAKER_00 3:09

He was, and really weirdly enough, my brother was annoyed that night because he hired the band with the previous singer. Which was who? I don't know. A a black a black male singer.

SPEAKER_03 3:24

Oh, okay, Mike.

First Gig: A Wedding And A Job Offer

SPEAKER_00 3:25

Mike um And my brother, you know, he like my brother loves music. He plays drums, he sings, and um and he loved he hired the band. One of the big reasons w were was because of the black male singer. He was like, that guy was awesome.

SPEAKER_02 3:40

He was good, he was fun.

SPEAKER_00 3:41

And he wa yeah, so and um so he said something to Sean. My brother said something to Sean, and Sean was like, But don't worry, don't worry, he's even better, he's better.

SPEAKER_03 3:49

He's even better. He's even better. He's better, he's still black.

SPEAKER_00 3:52

So uh yeah, he's still black. He still goes out in the crowd. And um and of course, Shell was amazing. And uh Shell, I so I just saw the picture the other day um of a picture of me and John in front of my parents' house on our way to my brother's wedding. And I was like, that's the night I met, you know, the band. I'm like, Shell still says he remembers that dress I was wearing. You know what though?

SPEAKER_03 4:12

I think I remember the dress too. There was a it was I remember the dress. But that was part of the reason why you were hired, because of the dress.

SPEAKER_00 4:21

I'll agree.

SPEAKER_03 4:23

Um okay, so let me ask you this. So before that, what would go back Pamela as like a little A little baby?

SPEAKER_00 4:36

Oh, well that's well, that's going real far back.

SPEAKER_03 4:38

Uh so f tell me.

SPEAKER_00 4:39

Well, my first performance, my first public performance was at the Masonic Temple Christmas party. I was five years old, and um somebody asked on the microphone, Does any would anyone like to sing Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer?

SPEAKER_01 4:55

And I was like, me, me, me, me, me.

SPEAKER_00 4:58

So I went up, like I belonged there, and uh I sang Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer on the microphone on a stage, and that was it.

SPEAKER_03 5:06

So you just always knew this was gonna be easy.

SPEAKER_00 5:09

There was no other option. There was no other option for me. All right.

SPEAKER_03 5:11

So then so go ahead, keep going.

SPEAKER_00 5:13

So then, um you know, uh little things here and there in s in grammar school and stuff, and then um in grammar school, I went to Catholic grammar school, and they took us as a field trip to um what was y used to be St. Agnes Catholic high school. Okay. Um and they took us to see a play. As as like a seventh grade class or whatever. We went to see a high school play. And I remember being in that auditorium and and watching the play and going, holy g I wanna do that. I want to do that on this stage. So that made me go to that high school.

SPEAKER_01 5:48

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 5:48

I was in the drama club in there, and um, you know, I was in all the plays. And then I just oh, then I thought I was gonna I was like, oh, this is I'm gonna be on Broadway. I'm gonna just shoot for the stars.

SPEAKER_03 6:01

You could have been on Broadway.

SPEAKER_00 6:02

You could have I still can't you had that.

SPEAKER_03 6:05

You still have to never too late. I'm not I'm gonna be able to do that. You just gotta get a you're gonna get a weekend off from club dates. Right. And then you can be on Broadway.

SPEAKER_00 6:12

I have to I'm not I'm no longer an ingenue, but I can be um what is that? An ingenux is the is the young the young um French something French gorgeous um protagonist in a show. Uh oh in the main case.

SPEAKER_03 6:27

I want you to know these words have never been used on this podcast ever. Just you you have groundbreaking Aside from being the first chick singer. Yay! Yes, you're the first chick singer.

SPEAKER_00 6:36

I am honored to be here, John. Honestly, thank you for asking me. And it's so great to see you.

SPEAKER_03 6:40

And you know what's great is you were late, too, like all chick singers. Yes, I was.

SPEAKER_00 6:45

It's called fashionably late, isn't it?

SPEAKER_03 6:47

Uh annoyingly late. Oh, annoying. No, that's the word. You're right. No, you're right. So go ahead. So now you're where are we? What where are we at your age?

SPEAKER_00 6:56

Now I'm like after high school. And of course my parents were always like that's great. We're supporting your creativity a hundred percent. Just get paid.

SPEAKER_03 7:06

So they were always like They weren't trying to push you somewhere else.

SPEAKER_00 7:09

No, they were like, hey, you know, you need to have another job. You need to have a job.

SPEAKER_03 7:13

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 7:13

You need to have a job, you need to get paid, you need to have you know, do your responsibilities. Like, you know, you need to pay your bills, you need to take care of your shit. Um and I'm the youngest of four siblings. Um I didn't know that. Yeah, I'm the youngest of four. I'm the baby. And so so I liked that my parents were supportive in the arts and of me being in the arts, but they were always like, that's great, honey. Do it. Do it up, but make sure you get paid for your time. Okay. Get paid for your time.

SPEAKER_03 7:42

Because most parents would say, eh, just do it on the side.

SPEAKER_00 7:45

And so like I kind of like that was in my head the whole time, and I was like, all right, I need to get paid. I need to get paid for my time and my talent. So that's how it kind of worked out. Um and I did a lot of community theater. Um you know, I can't even remember all the things that I did, but I was always dabbling.

SPEAKER_03 8:00

When you graduate high school, you were full-time musician.

unknown 8:02

Right?

Early Performances And Theater Dreams

SPEAKER_00 8:03

When I graduated from high school, no. I I was a full-time receptionist. I was a receptionist for a a real estate company. I was a receptionist for a um a law firm in Manhattan. Hello. La Sorce, Benaventano, and Alfano, how can I help you? Nice Irish boys. Um So, you know, I always had jobs. So you had it so you like a day job and then you just I had a day job and then I did my cool night stuff, um, performing stuff. And then I auditioned for a show called Um Joey and Mary's Italian-Irish Comedy Wedding, which was a total ripoff of Tony and Tina's.

SPEAKER_03 8:41

Right, I was gonna say it's what it sounds like.

SPEAKER_00 8:42

Audience participation dinner theater. And uh man, that just catapulted me. My father was like, My goodness. He's like, Since you've been in this show, you really came out of your shell.

SPEAKER_03 8:52

Wait, so how old were you then?

SPEAKER_00 8:55

Um twenty-two.

SPEAKER_03 8:57

Okay. So still a baby.

SPEAKER_00 8:58

Yeah. Twenty-two. And then um so I was in that show and it was great. I was getting paid to do um to do an like a show that was maybe a third of the way scripted, and everything else was unscripted. I was allowed to do anything, say anything, go anywhere in my brain to make people laugh.

SPEAKER_03 9:23

Okay, that's cool.

SPEAKER_00 9:24

It was so cool.

SPEAKER_03 9:26

So you had it so funny. Okay, so that's interesting because you had it you had to be funny and personable as well as be able to sing, which uh that's a weird thing. That's a good thing. Yeah, it was pretty cool. Well, I uh I I don't mean weird, I mean uh talk about typecasting.

SPEAKER_00 9:40

I got I got hired as the ex-girlfriend who crashed the wedding. Oh yeah. And I'm telling you, man, that was the best part ever. Viola. Viola, what are you doing here?

SPEAKER_03 9:51

Oh, that's what your name was, Viola?

SPEAKER_00 9:52

Viola was my name.

SPEAKER_03 9:54

That's weird.

SPEAKER_00 9:55

I know. Because of where we are.

SPEAKER_03 9:56

Because of my street.

SPEAKER_00 9:57

I know. Uh yeah, it was a dead end, apparently, as well.

SPEAKER_03 10:05

Oh shit. That was funny, man.

SPEAKER_00 10:08

I didn't know So then okay, so now I'm in the show. I'm in the traveling cast. So and I, you know, I don't know what it is, like with my family. Uh I we're we're drivers. Like we We're just drivers, you know.

SPEAKER_03 10:20

You and your drivers.

SPEAKER_00 10:21

My father had a moving company, and we had a place upstate. My my parents, um, we had a family cabin up in Harrowd State Park. And we And also, as a family, we went cross country. I've been in every state in the United States except Alaska, Hawaii.

SPEAKER_03 10:37

Okay, so you guys traveled a lot.

SPEAKER_00 10:38

Traveled in a motorhome. So we were just kind of like, I don't know, that's why I say we're drivers. So I have no I I don't mind driving. I like driving, you know? So I was in the traveling cast, and and we would go all over the tri-state area and beyond. And um and so I would a lot of the times I was in the car with this guy, Brian Georgie. He was so funny, man, just a really funny guy. He was part of the cast, one. He was part of the cast. And um and at that point, a lot of people in that show lived in Manhattan, and they didn't have cars. I was like the Long Island chick. And so they would take the train to me, get in my car, and I would drive to Staten Island, New Jersey, Albany. And um so he was just a new member of this original rock and roll band called Fletcher McTaggart. And he was like, hey, he's like, I have this band, and like everyone is talking about they want like a backup chick singer. He's like, Would you be interested in uh auditioning? I was like, Yeah. So I went in, I saw John Hurley's face.

SPEAKER_03 11:36

John Hurley.

SPEAKER_00 11:37

I I and I was like, Oh my god, I'm in love with that guy. He doesn't even know. I don't even know his name, but I love that man.

SPEAKER_03 11:43

Um what was Hurley doing? He was playing playing guitar or anything?

SPEAKER_00 11:46

Yeah, he was playing guitar in lots of different bands, he's doing his his own kind of thing, and um and that's how I met John. And um I mean, and the rest is history from that was that was that was thirty years ago. That was thirty years ago.

SPEAKER_02 11:58

You married thirty years?

SPEAKER_00 11:59

No. No, I met him thirty years ago. And what the cool thing was I was dating somebody, he was dating somebody. We were definitely attracted to each other, but we respected our relationships and um and we you know, it was a professional relationship musically. Um so we kept we we um were steadfast in our own relationships and then I quit the band, I got nodules on my vocal cords because I wasn't using it correctly. I didn't I didn't know what I was doing. I was just singing and I wasn't supporting. So I I hurt myself. So I quit the show, I quit the band, I quit smoking Marlboro's.

SPEAKER_02 12:34

No, it's just to smoke, I didn't even know that.

SPEAKER_00 12:36

Yep. Um and so then I got um f uh voice therapy. And so whatever, I didn't see the guys in the band for a long time. I didn't see the people in the show for a long time, and then I needed a guitar player, and I just called up John Hurley and I was like, hey, you know, I need a guitar player for this little thing I'm doing. Are you available? And he was like, Yeah, yeah, let's rehearse. And then when he came over to my house to rehearse, we were hanging out, doing music, and then we discovered that we were not going out with anybody at the time. So since that day, that was 26 years ago. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 13:06

26 years? Holy shit.

SPEAKER_00 13:08

We're married, we're married 20 years this year. Oh god. And we never had a fight.

Day Jobs, Dinner Theater, And Finding Voice

SPEAKER_03 13:12

Never had a fight, yes. That he won. That he won. Okay. All right, that makes sense. That makes more that definitely makes more sense to me, because I never want to fight either. Anyway, so I'm a lover, not a fighter. Yeah. So now uh um So what so what then? Like what where are we now as far as your age goes? What time when how old were you even joined Code Blue?

SPEAKER_00 13:35

Um I must have been thirty I must have been thirty-two or thirty. Twenty-nine, thirty.

SPEAKER_02 13:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 13:44

So um so what happened was when I kept on calling Sean to see if he had any openings, and I was like, Remember me, remember me. I sang at my brother's wedding. He's he would always be like, Yep, I remember you, Pamela, I remember you. Don't worry, I'm not gonna forget. And when I have a spot for you, I will let you know. And I kept on calling, kept on calling. And then finally, um one of his bands, Rhapsody.

SPEAKER_03 14:06

I forgot that band even existed.

SPEAKER_00 14:08

Rhapsody. Tony Anzalone was the um band leader in that band. Tony, Tony Anzalone. So I remember Tony Anzalone.

SPEAKER_03 14:16

I don't remember him either. Oh man, Tony Anzalone. I really think I blocked all this stuff out.

SPEAKER_00 14:20

Man, Tony Anzalone, I'm s I'm 52 now, and he still is one of my top five favorite people in my world.

SPEAKER_03 14:27

Really?

SPEAKER_00 14:28

Tony Anzelone was the coolest, just a great guy.

SPEAKER_03 14:32

So Tony's still alive.

SPEAKER_00 14:33

Tony's still alive, yep. And he's um he's, you know, he's still playing. He's still playing out, you know.

SPEAKER_01 14:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 14:40

But he got out a long time ago. Anyway, um he was with you know, Charlie Dioria and Greg Warnikowski. Oh. They were in Rhapsody.

SPEAKER_03 14:48

Okay, all right, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 14:49

And um Sal. What was it? Sal? The uh the saxophone player. I'm sorry, Caesar. Caesar was the last one. Caesar, even more Italian. Caesar was the um saxophone player in that band. And um Bobby. Bobby was the drummer. Oh, what's his last name? Bobby. Oh, um Oh god. I can't remember his last name.

SPEAKER_03 15:10

I can't remember my last name. Anyway, so okay, so you So you joined Rhapsody?

SPEAKER_00 15:16

I joined Rhapsody. I was at Rhapsody for seven years.

SPEAKER_03 15:18

And I remember why do I not remember this?

SPEAKER_00 15:20

Tony Anselone called me up and he was like, Okay, all right, Pam. Uh Sean told me you're good, but I know you're green. I know you're a green. And you know what? He's like, I'm gonna take a chance on you. He's like, but but he's like, I know you like to do your little acting thing and your little comedy thing, and you you know, you're singing stuff. You know, like in in musicals and everything. He's like, but let me tell you right now. He goes, you need to commit. He goes, because we have a gig. Right. You're on the contract, he goes, you might not be able to go to your niece's communion. Yeah. And I said, Oh shit. Can I can I call you back?

SPEAKER_03 15:58

That hasn't changed, right? That's all the same. That's still the same. I was like, I can't I can't do that.

SPEAKER_00 16:05

But then I eventually I was like, all right, I'll do it. And then like, you know, and then through the years, all of my family and friends know that I I work on the weekends and I can't do a lot of.

SPEAKER_03 16:16

Let me tell you something. The one thing I miss about doing club dates is just what you're saying. Is that I have to go to all these stupid ass, you know, the a one-year-old birthday party in New Jersey. Get the fuck out of here. Now I gotta go. Because it used to go, uh, no way, man. Saturday night, not gonna make it.

SPEAKER_00 16:33

Well, you still can say I have a gig.

SPEAKER_03 16:35

No, no, I can't tell my wife I have a gig. She knows I don't have a gig, so I have to go.

SPEAKER_00 16:40

Oh man, she doesn't have you back on that? No.

SPEAKER_03 16:42

No, no, because it's usually her family.

SPEAKER_00 16:44

We call it getting out of getting a get out of jail free card.

SPEAKER_03 16:48

Yep. That was the saving grace about doing it that I don't miss.

SPEAKER_00 16:53

And you made money.

SPEAKER_03 16:54

And I made money. You know? And or or now, instead of like going out and making money on a Saturday night, I gotta go to a wedding and it's torturous. That's hard. Yeah, it is. It is. But whatever.

SPEAKER_00 17:07

It's you know. So I've had the last couple weeks off.

SPEAKER_03 17:11

You know, that's the kind of season.

SPEAKER_00 17:13

And so my friend was like, Oh, how is this Saturday night? I'm like, I felt like a normal person. Right. I felt like we I I had we had the um our friends over for dinner, and then we went to go see music. I was like, I felt like a real normal person.

SPEAKER_03 17:26

That's the one thing I I mean I remember that like it was just like every Saturday night I had that feeling like, oh, here we go. I have to, I can't be home. Because I was working five days a week. I was working, you know, I was full-time during the week. And then sometimes I'd I'd have to go home on Friday and go out to work on on Friday night, and it just sucked, you know.

SPEAKER_00 17:46

It's it's hard. And it's you know and it's not like it's it's not e oh, people go people say to me all the time, Oh my god, that must be so much fun. So much fun, yeah. And you know what I say to them? I swear to God, I'm such an asshole. I'm like, do you let me ask you a question?

SPEAKER_03 18:01

I'm like, I wish we were on video here to see that screen.

SPEAKER_00 18:05

I'm like, let me ask you. D do you have fun at work? And they're like, well They don't get it.

SPEAKER_03 18:10

They don't get it. Well, I'll tell you I'll tell you what happens to me, which I hate, is that, you know, if because we're all musicians, right? We're all like at a at a certain level of musicianship, but there's a whole other level below or too below where we are that do gigs. And then sometimes now I'm dragged out on a Saturday night, and they know I'm a musician, and it's their friend who pla who's a plumber, but he plays drums on a weekend. And I and they like go, how do you aren't these guys great? Everybody's drinking, aren't they great? And I have to sit there and go, it's great. Yeah, the more you drink, the better they get. I know. You know, it's like that's it's you know, my my bar is pretty high. My bar, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 18:47

And it's like it's almost like non-reachable.

Bands, Hurley, Nodules, And Persistence

SPEAKER_03 18:50

So this is the reason for this podcast. Is that like what what other profession can s can you say, like if you're let's say you're a lawyer, can you can you go say I'm gonna do accounting on the side on the weekends, I'm gonna buy an accountant, I'm gonna buy a calculator and just do it on the side. What like this is what these guys do, right? They buy a guitar. They buy the guitar on the side. I was at a wake for my cousin's one of my cousins, I don't know, my aunt maybe, I don't even know. And her husband is an accountant and he plays guitar. And so now I'm at the wake and he knows I'm a drummer and and sitting there, right? He goes, Hey, oh yeah, this is my friend Bill. He plays uh he plays bass. Oh, look, guitar is bass and drum right here. I'm like, no, no, it's not, it's not guitar bass and drums because you have the instrument. You can't this is why I say you should have to audition for your shit. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 19:44

Just because you have the instrument. Right. Everyone has a voice.

SPEAKER_03 19:47

Right.

SPEAKER_00 19:47

But I like I really do but like I like I try to be nice about it. I'm like, everyone can sing. Not everybody can sing great. No, but everyone can sing. I don't think so. I don't think everybody can sing.

SPEAKER_03 19:58

I don't

SPEAKER_00 20:00

I get seeing it. Okay. Everybody can sing, they just can't carry a tune. Everyone can't carry a tune, but they could sing off key.

SPEAKER_03 20:06

Oh but that's like that's I I I know, I know.

SPEAKER_00 20:09

It's bad.

SPEAKER_03 20:09

It's like putting your underwear on backwards. I mean, I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 20:12

Oh man, that is bad.

SPEAKER_03 20:13

I I get I get for me, see, I it's when somebody's like screwing something up musically and they're even if they're trying, I I get insulted by it. I it's like somebody hitting my kid. That's what I feel like. Right? Because we're this is this is think about this is the only profession that's like it's in you. It's embedded. It's not like you go, Oh, okay, I'm gonna be a teacher or whatever. You know, you're not born to be a teacher, you don't like or a dentist. Or whatever. Whatever, right? You hear music every day of your life, no matter what you're doing. Right, right? And some some of us have this like it's just stuck in us. Oh yeah. I uh I my friend Dave did a podcast and he said it great. He said, um I didn't choose drums. Drums chose me. You know, and it's true. It's true. You just you couldn't do anything else. Yeah, this who, me? Yeah. No, sing. Really? I don't even like my speaking voice.

SPEAKER_00 21:03

Oh, I think you have a great speaking voice.

SPEAKER_03 21:05

Uh sucks. No, I I have sung before, but it's I've I there you go.

SPEAKER_00 21:12

I mean, can you hold can you carry a tune? Can you sing in the side? Yeah, but that doesn't ask you that.

SPEAKER_03 21:17

I could sing the ABC song.

SPEAKER_00 21:19

Yeah, but you have such a nice speaking voice. I'm sure like even with your um even if you're like if you need like a harmony or something, like quick, you don't do that yourself?

SPEAKER_03 21:27

Right. No, no, no. Okay. No. Okay. Did you ever hear Dave? I'm gonna insult Dave.

SPEAKER_00 21:33

Dave Anton? Dave Anton. No, I've never heard him sing.

SPEAKER_03 21:36

Because Dave is I I don't know. He's probably listening right now, but that's okay. Because Dave knows I love him. But Dave has the balls to like demo his tunes for a singer. So he'll he'll sing the inner. Yeah, he'll like I would never. I would never, but he does. He does.

SPEAKER_00 21:52

Yeah, but I bet you you could. I bet you you're not as bad as you think.

SPEAKER_03 21:56

Sometimes I can't even stand in the way play drums. You know, it's like oof.

SPEAKER_00 22:00

Sometimes I hear my voice, I'm like, what why the fuck am I a singer? No, I'm not sure if it's so bad. Oh man, lots of times I hear myself, I'm like, yeah, pack it in. But that's only that's only when I'm like sick of myself. You know, do you ever get sick of yourself?

SPEAKER_03 22:16

Oh, I just I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 22:16

Man, I'm so fucking sick of myself half the time. I'm like, I don't even know what I'm doing.

SPEAKER_03 22:21

And you know, I'm playing in a trio, I'm playing in two trios right now. One of them's a jazz trio, and these guys are like heavily into Bill Evans. Oh. But they they know the dogma of Bill Evans. Like Bill Evans uh had a vasectomy. Yeah, Bill Evans is he was when he played this tune on a stage in Manhattan in 1927, he was wearing a wig and he he threw up and all this shit. I'm like, what are you talking about? I'm like fighting for my life just trying to keep up with these guys, and they know everything about what they're playing. I think that's not me.

SPEAKER_01 22:47

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 22:48

You know, I I I don't like you know, that kind of shit. I'm like, what why am I even doing that?

SPEAKER_00 22:53

Like, yeah. Yes. And me and John, it's so funny. We're like, we're we we do great stuff together, and we're both like we suck.

SPEAKER_03 23:00

Oh, I gotta have a funny Pam Lewis story.

SPEAKER_00 23:03

Oh, tell me.

SPEAKER_03 23:05

Tell me. You did a track for me one time for my friend John, right?

SPEAKER_00 23:10

You did Wait, my friend John We did our secret language.

SPEAKER_03 23:14

Secret language we did here in my studio. But you also did some stuff at your house for my friend John. He needed it was like a Latin tune. You probably don't remember it.

SPEAKER_00 23:23

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_03 23:24

And it had like six or you did like six vocals on it, background vocals.

SPEAKER_00 23:28

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_03 23:28

And I think What?

unknown 23:32

What?

SPEAKER_03 23:32

I think you were drinking during the session. Maybe. Because John was punching you in and out. He was doing the John Hurley? You brought your husband, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 23:40

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 23:41

And um I kept like I was trying to line him up with the tracks, and then John took a little while to punch you out. And then a couple of times you would you would say in some shit that was funny, but the last time I listened to you going, you did all these fucking vocals sounded great, and then you said, Oh, sounds like some Joni Mitchell shit.

unknown 24:00

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_03 24:02

And it did. It sounded like Jody Mitchell.

Joining Rhapsody And Life In Club Dates

SPEAKER_00 24:04

Well, man, I I I think I like singing harmonies better than I like singing lead. Yeah. Oh yeah, man. I love getting in in the harmony. And that's like when I was in high school, um, being a part of a chorus with a hundred people in it really sparked something inside of me for harmonies. And I went crazy with harmonies. Dude, and my high school chorus teacher, Mr. Blanton, he came to my he came remember him. He came to my wedding. He's on a couple of tracks playing keyboards on me and John's original st um songs. His birthday's on Halloween. I call him every His birthday's on Halloween. His birthday's on October 31st. Oh my god. And this last Halloween, we were at we were we were at a jam, like hanging out, like we were drinking, having fun, like playing, like party, like dramming, you know. And it was like 1139. And I was like, shit, I have to call Mr. Blanton on his birthday. So I called him up and I left a message. So then like called him back like two days later. I was like, hey, Mr. Blanton. I was like, did you get my message? And he was like, Yes, I did. And I'm like, I was drunk, but I was trying to act like I wasn't drunk. And he was like, Well well, it didn't work, honey, but thank you. I appreciate the call. So he's still in my life, 35 years later.

SPEAKER_03 25:16

That's a lot of music teachers. I think it's a big thing.

SPEAKER_00 25:17

Man, yeah, I I mean, and he was a big I still have kids, not kids.

SPEAKER_03 25:21

I'm yeah, I we went to Epcot like three years ago or something, and one of my kids who was in fourth grade, fucking little tiny girl, is the at the head of the talent in Epcot. So she runs the talent in Epcot. So we she says to me, You have to come to my office and see me. So I go, she got an office in Epcot, and she's two years uh older than my wife. Like, oh my god, it is so over for me.

SPEAKER_00 25:49

Was that incredible?

SPEAKER_03 25:50

Yeah, and she's a grown woman and she's it she was a little kid.

SPEAKER_00 25:53

Oh my god, that's that makes me so happy.

SPEAKER_03 25:56

And I have I have kids like I put up a picture of me me conducting the band from 19, I don't know, 27? 92 or some shit. And k all the kids who are now grown who have kids my kids' age tag themselves. And they all it's it's just weird. It's weird because I I run into them.

SPEAKER_00 26:12

But that's man, that's how much you affect people. And that's how much and that's how this music thing grow. Like d i i i i the lawyers don't have that.

SPEAKER_03 26:22

That well, yeah, but they have money.

SPEAKER_00 26:24

The doctors don't have that.

SPEAKER_03 26:25

They have money.

SPEAKER_00 26:26

Well, we have we have heart and we have we have to take them on. Meaningful life, I think. I just haven't f found mine lately yet.

SPEAKER_03 26:35

Were you um Were you on the gig Were you in Code Blue on the when the change the the when it 1999 to 2000, that gig? When we played New Year's Eve 1999. You weren't on the gig?

SPEAKER_00 26:49

Nope. Because I don't think it's 2026 now, and I like I said, I called Sean for like two years. I called him for a long time to remi you know, to keep on putting me in his brain, you know. I I really I find it hard to believe because I I No, I was in Manhattan at a party uh for 1999 to 2000.

SPEAKER_03 27:10

Okay. I remember I was in Manhattan because it was late in millennium. You can ask him about this story. It's stroke of midnight. Now it's going f would change in. Where were you? We would there. Where? Oh, I didn't even know something fucking place. That's when they thought Y2K everything was gonna change. Yeah, everything was gonna blow up. So so it was ask him, because I'm unless I'm losing my mind. Struck a uh at the stroke of midnight, some guy was in his face, like yelling at him, like you guys are too loud or something. Sean. Sean was like, I just spent my I just spent the turning of the of the decade getting yelled at by a 78-year-old guy.

SPEAKER_00 27:49

Oh man, that's so memorable.

SPEAKER_03 27:50

I I remember the guy had his finger in Sean's face, and it was like, Happy New Year! And the guy screamed Sean.

SPEAKER_00 27:56

You know, man, they take a lot. The club date bands take a lot.

SPEAKER_03 28:02

You know what's weird though? The weirdest thing since I left the band is now I'm every gig I do now is like a club gig. And it's blowing away the first couple of club gigs I did, club gigs I did. People come up to you, or people or people stand and watch and and absorb it and then like want to talk to you afterwards. I'm like, what's this about? Because normally you get ignored.

SPEAKER_00 28:22

Oh, nobody knows I'm there.

SPEAKER_03 28:25

Well, that's what I'm saying. So I was like, what's what's happening here? This is so I think this is what I'm like, what appreciation? This is what people do it. Like you you other people come up and say, Hey, uh I'm a drummer too, and I got a hat that's got drums on it, and you know, some other bullshit, whatever. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 28:40

Well, it's appreciation, and that goes a long way.

SPEAKER_03 28:43

I'm not used to that. Yeah. I'm not used to it.

SPEAKER_00 28:45

Oh, and I feel like I'm invisible every fucking time I go to work. And then when that one person says that, though. Because uh because of the because of the the way it's made to feel. Like it's like we're so far away from them uh emotionally, physically. It's like we're like it's like we're literally the the help. And when one and then when that one person says to me in the bathroom or whatever, they're like, I'm like, okay, okay, well then tonight I'm okay. Because somebody actually pay attention and like, you know, and and got some joy out of m what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_03 29:20

But I'm wondering why it's not a common thing. Like, why don't people go up to the band and say you guys are good, you guys are great, whatever. I don't it never they they would eventually, I guess, but that it was a different thing. That nobody would stand next to you and watch you play. Well Me playing.

SPEAKER_00 29:34

The people that are going out, like you just said, the people that are going out to listen to music are the people that go out to listen to music. Right. The people at a wedding, they're they're they're they're shocked that there's ten people on stage making noise together. I know. And they're they like they are are literally shocked. And then like, you know what the worst compliment I ever got was what? Oh, you guys sound exactly like the record. I'm like, oh my god, you have no idea how insulting that is. But you know, thanks.

SPEAKER_03 30:05

People are stupid. That's not the compliment I want.

The Weekend Grind And Invisible Musicians

SPEAKER_00 30:09

You know? I know. They are stupid, but yet they're s yet they're on the dance floor all night enjoying the shit out of what what we're given. You know, like all about you know, there's ten people giving energy and everyone, you know, i there's energy flowing in that whole room. And they don't they're too stupid to I don't want to say they're too stupid, but they don't know that that's happening. And they and that's why like people take advantage of or te people take for granted uh what performers and what musicians are doing, unless it's fucking, you know, like unless it's like, you know, high end and they're like, oh, uh, you know, I heard it's Broadway or or something very you know, up a restaurant and something um so um kind of um impressive. So it's like one of the jokes I do. I'm like, people are like, what do you do? And I'm like, uh I'm the singer in a 10-piece band for hire. I'm like, doesn't that sound doesn't that sound impressive? Aren't you impressed? And they're like, yeah. And I'm like, I'm in a fucking wedding band. You know, but I never say I'm in a wedding band first. Because I feel like there's also um you know, uh like, oh, they don't t oh, they're oh, oh, you're in a wedding band, you know, and they think of the chicken dance and they think of ruffled fucking uh tuxedo shirts. Do you know what I mean? So there's like a um a stigma to that.

SPEAKER_03 31:22

Well, I l I you know, the thing I do miss is twenty years ago, you go wherever you went for a gig, there was always some friends of mine playing like two doors down or something. Or in the same place, I get to hang out, you know, and see those guys. Yeah. And that doesn't I don't know if that happens anymore, but there's not a lot of There's not a lot of bands working.

SPEAKER_00 31:41

So I mean, I am so grateful for my I'm so grateful that I get to sing for a living. Honestly, I I'm I'm I'm so lucky. But I also have the talent to actually do it. So I'm I'm happy to do that. But you do that.

SPEAKER_03 31:53

What are you doing besides that? You're doing outside stuff, too. I walk dogs. I've been walking dogs by the way.

SPEAKER_00 31:57

I mean, musically you got to Because I like dogs better than I like people.

SPEAKER_03 32:02

Yeah, people don't pee on your foot, do they? Sometimes.

SPEAKER_00 32:06

Well Sometimes, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 32:08

That's John.

SPEAKER_00 32:09

Yeah. And Shell. Sometimes Shell.

SPEAKER_03 32:11

Shell pee on your foot. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 32:14

But he's my dog. No, I'm kidding. Um I love you, Shell. Um Shell's my hu my work husband. Really? Well, no. Dave's my work husband and Shell's my work boyfriend.

SPEAKER_03 32:22

Shell We take care of each other. I I invited Shell in my house this summer. Why? For I had a party.

SPEAKER_00 32:28

Oh.

SPEAKER_03 32:28

You know, it was like a I was a- That was that was a joke. Oh. I'm like, why? So he Shell has got such a good sense of humor with this stuff. So I was all he didn't come. He didn't because he didn't come. But I was so I told him when I like I saw him, I saw him when he did the podcast. I said to him, uh, I had this whole line set up. I mean, you were gonna walk into my backyard and I was gonna I was gonna scream home invasion.

SPEAKER_00 32:55

Call the police.

SPEAKER_03 32:57

And he laughed. You know, it's it's because he's funny that way.

SPEAKER_00 33:00

Yeah, I mean, and that's the cool thing about um the the ten-piece band. It's like, you know, everyone uh Ten pieces is I know. Everyone has their own personalities and egos.

SPEAKER_02 33:11

Yeah, well.

SPEAKER_00 33:12

But you know what? How many four singers in the band? How many what?

SPEAKER_02 33:16

Singers.

SPEAKER_00 33:16

Six. Six out of ten. Sean, Faith, Adam, Pamela, Shell, Anthony. And then Dan Wood, but he's no longer with us. So there was seven. Um but they're not.

SPEAKER_03 33:29

But how many how many just there are just singers? Like Sean plays guitar. Four. Four singers.

SPEAKER_00 33:35

Shell, Pamela, Faith, and Adam. Just four. Okay. Just just singers. Correct. Just four singers, yeah. Um But you know at the end of the day, we all have a mutual respect for each other and and and we we know each other so well that it is really like family. And I fucking hate all of them. Just like I hate all of my family. But at the same time, I love the shit out of them.

SPEAKER_03 33:57

That's that's what it is. It's a love-hate relationship, yeah. It's a family unit. It is a family unit. It is. Were you on the gig um that my wife showed up to before she was my wife?

SPEAKER_00 34:09

I think so.

SPEAKER_03 34:10

It was at the oh god, I can't remember any of these places.

SPEAKER_00 34:13

You know what? If you tell me the place, I'll remember better. Because it's like whenever you you see that.

SPEAKER_03 34:17

Okay, it's it was Born Mansion?

SPEAKER_00 34:20

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 34:22

I think it was Born Mansion. Anyway, the reason why I wanted to bring that up is because we were just starting to see each other. I said, I'm playing at the gig. You can come in and you just just dress up. He was just you know, he wasn't one of his tunes. So she was dressed, she looked nice. And he so he walked up to her. And he said to what he said to her what? So so what are you doing? He started to like I don't know if he started to hit on her or whatever. And he said, she said, well, no, so she says to Tommy, No, I'm with the band. And he goes, You with the band?

unknown 34:58

What do you mean you're the band?

SPEAKER_03 35:02

I had to explain that to him. She's not with the band. She's here to see me. You know, it's like funny, funny shit.

SPEAKER_00 35:09

So go so what Well, that's a you know, funny things happen at gigs.

SPEAKER_03 35:13

What do you got from me? You got a funny story?

SPEAKER_00 35:15

All right, I man, I love telling the story. And, you know, I don't I ha you know, telling a story is such a um in art form, I don't think I tell it very well, but I'm I'm working on it.

SPEAKER_03 35:26

First of all, give me the timeline. Okay the timeline.

SPEAKER_00 35:28

So I'm now I'm newly in this in the band Rhapsody. And maybe I'm maybe in my maybe four years in, and um and my band leader is Tony Anzalone. Now just to give you a visual, Tony Anzolone looks exactly like Sean Connery. He does? Oh. Exactly like him. Handsome devil. Handsome devil. And so, you know, like I didn't realize there's so much funny banter on the bandstand, and everyone has like nicknames for shit.

SPEAKER_03 36:00

In that band.

SPEAKER_00 36:00

Oh, in and uh in code blue.

SPEAKER_03 36:02

Oh, in every band, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 36:03

You know, like it's you know you don't actually say the name of the song anymore. You say something that sounds like it, you know, like so we were at this what's the um what's the catering hall that doesn't exist anymore on Old Country Road. On Old Country Road. Um big place. I mean lots of different rooms. Old Country. Big place, Old Country Road. Um I think I've blocked it out. Um Chateau Brian.

SPEAKER_03 36:29

Oh doesn't exist anymore?

Standards, Amateurs, And Professional Pride

SPEAKER_00 36:30

Nope. Nope. Okay. So Chateaubriand, Tony Ansel looks like um Sean Connery. Okay. And there's like a lot like lots of funny stuff that like goes on. So he used to call the you know, the Viennese hour? Yeah. Like Of course I didn't. So Tony used to call it the Vietnamese hour. Vietnamese yeah, they all did that. Okay, we all did that? Okay. So I mean I I was new, so Tony, I you know, Tony introduced me to that kind of kind of banter like on the band stage. So so I remember one Vietnamese hour, the Matre D. The Maitre D comes up to Tony and he goes, All right, uh, can you guys play something exciting? Because we're gonna bring out our Viennese uh, you know, tables out onto the dance floor. Yeah. And so Tony goes, guys, can you play the Rocky theme? So picture this. The place is pitch black. There are no lights because they're trying to make a big deal out of this Viennese out that they c they they they wheel out all these fucking carts on this huge dance floor. And the band is fucking playing rocky, and Tony Anselon goes, It's black, okay? You can't see your hand in front of your face. Okay, everybody, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Chateaubriand's famous Viennese hour with treats from around the world and around the corner. And then this fucking flambe goes up in the flames. He's like, and flashbacks from Nom. People I I've never laughed so hard in my entire life. It's one of my best memories.

SPEAKER_03 38:16

Well, that's I mean, that's um I think that's like typical.

SPEAKER_00 38:21

The funny thing is, is Tony was a veteran.

SPEAKER_03 38:23

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 38:24

So he was actually in Vietnam.

unknown 38:26

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_00 38:29

Around the world and around the corner, flashbacks from Nom. And and like the like the light came on and people were like, like their face was like, what the fuck did he just say?

SPEAKER_03 38:40

I you know, I was in a band, I was in a million club day bands before Code Blue. One of them was Paul Black Tie Affair, and the the keyboard player was a was ver well, like way, way above the rest of the musicianship of the band. He was just great. And he obviously didn't want to be there, and he'd say stuff on the mic all the time. And the the thing was the leader of the band would Blake the uh the the bride dance with her father. He'd say, Um, so now our bridal's gonna come up and dance with the most important men, one of the most important men in her life, and he on the microphone said, Her black lover.

SPEAKER_00 39:16

Oh my god!

SPEAKER_03 39:19

He was he was fired right up.

SPEAKER_00 39:21

He was fired. Dude, that's it.

SPEAKER_03 39:23

That was a bridge too far.

SPEAKER_00 39:25

That's funny that you say that because me moving from the Joey and Mary's Italian-Irish comedy wedding, dude, I could say anything and everything to make people laugh. So when I actually became in a real wedding band, I used to say shit on the mic, and Tony would be like, Pat, shut, what are you doing? I'd be like, Yeah, nice dress, Anne Angela, you know. And Tony's like, Pat, shut the fuck up. I'm like, oh sorry. I I because I wanted to make people laugh, and he was like, That's not this. And I'm like, Right. All right, this is a real wedding.

SPEAKER_03 39:51

Were you in the band when um asked Donna about this? Because unless I'm like having a stroke. I remember distinctly Donna calling the bridal party. You know, name whatever, calling the names out. Yeah. And then after she was done calling him out, she you know, she used to stand in front of me. She turned around and said she had the the sh she threw the sheet and said, No, she was calling uh Uncle Fido or whatever. Yeah. And she turned around and said, Oh, he's dead.

SPEAKER_00 40:14

I sh that happened to her a couple times, and that killed her. I mean, no pun intended. Um But yeah, she'd be like, fuck. And that would that would really kill her. She was you know, she was very emotional. And it's it's it's hard to keep track.

SPEAKER_03 40:31

Well you did a gig one time, like this. I mean, I I'm doing this since like 1978 or some shit. You know, sort of like the narrogance it in, all guys, no girls in the band.

SPEAKER_01 40:41

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_03 40:41

And they would read the bridal party, whatever, and it was one job with the leaders reading. He's, you know, of course he didn't look at it beforehand. He's just reading the names. And he's going, you know, so-and-so and so-and-so, blah, blah, blah, blah. Uh, you know, Aunt Hilda and Uncle Jerry. And then they don't come out. Uh-huh. So we're playing. Yeah. And he's going, okay, come on, Aunt Hilda and Uncle Jerry. You know, and so we see now, you know, nothing's happening. So all of a sudden, Aunt come here comes Aunt Hilda by herself. So he's looking and he goes, Okay, where's Uncle Jerry? Uncle Jerry, come on, we know you're out there. And the guy's dead. He died like two days before. Oh my god. And you know, people he said people were crying on the s on the sides. He's fucking dead.

unknown 41:26

Oh my god, that's terrible.

SPEAKER_00 41:29

But it's fucking funny, dude.

SPEAKER_03 41:30

It was funny. It was funny. That was what that was what was great about those gigs.

SPEAKER_00 41:34

Oh, so I want it like, do you remember were you fucking there the night that someone took a swing?

SPEAKER_03 41:41

At who?

SPEAKER_00 41:42

One of our band members took a swing at another band member right on the bandstand.

SPEAKER_03 41:47

Yeah, you're talking about Tommy and Shill. Oh, he talked about Rocky.

SPEAKER_00 41:51

Talk about Rocky. Yeah, what that's right. Dude, that was crazy. And you know, and that just that proves or that just, you know, really reminds um you of tensions are tensions can run hot on the bandstand because of the egos and because of the personalities, and because I, you know, I fucking see you people more than I see my own family.

SPEAKER_03 42:15

That's what it is. Right. You used to eat dinner with them more than my family.

SPEAKER_00 42:18

Yeah, I I and when John commuted into Manhattan, I would, I really would see you guys more than I would see my own husband. Um so, but you know, tensions are hot, and like, I don't know, man, Shell said something that annoyed the shit out of Tommy. And it wasn't even like in the middle of a song that that you could like hide it, hide what happened. It was when they were cutting the cake.

SPEAKER_03 42:42

I yeah, I remember it was like pretty pollute.

unknown 42:44

Cutting the cake.

SPEAKER_00 42:45

And I was like, Wham, that's that's that'll go that'll go down in the books for something that like you don't normally see.

SPEAKER_03 42:51

There's a there's a ton of those stories. I mean, there's so many stories like where it where it's like you can't sh the shit you can't make this shit up. No, you can't make it up. I remember doing a bar mitzvah with a with a mother of the kid, the bar mitzvah kid, was speaking on the microphone right in front of me. We were on stage, and she went she had a clarinet case. She went like this to me, handed the clarinet case back to me, and said told me to put it together. First of all, how does she know I know how to put a clarinet together? And why why would you be like bizarre? And I did. I put it I happen to know because I was a band teacher. But it's like she just handed me a clarinet. I don't know. I'm behind the drums. All of a sudden there's a hand.

SPEAKER_00 43:25

And she played it?

SPEAKER_03 43:26

No, the kid played it.

SPEAKER_00 43:27

Oh, the kid.

SPEAKER_03 43:28

You know, Jeremy, who was thirteen or whatever, or whoever it was. I don't even know.

SPEAKER_00 43:32

Hi Hiram. But you know, and all during this 25-year thing with the with the um wedding band, I've been doing original music with John Hurley. Yeah. So yeah, let's talk about that.

SPEAKER_03 43:49

That's let's talk about that.

SPEAKER_00 43:50

That's amazing. And and he I still listen to that tune. Uh he's still a great he's such a great musician. Like he like, oh yeah. And it's like w we think we suck. Meanwhile, we we we make beautiful music together, you know. So we have to start getting back into that. And these few weeks that I've been off, and I have the next few weeks off, like that's allowing me to focus on other stuff. Um so that feels nice.

SPEAKER_03 44:11

Yeah, we should really make time for that though.

SPEAKER_00 44:13

You know it's of course we should.

SPEAKER_03 44:15

Yeah, I mean, because it's the authority thing is not creative at all. It's the opposite of creativity.

SPEAKER_00 44:19

It's the opposite of creative. My my you know, my musical soul is being crushed and dying. Right. But and then and so I'm writing a new cabaret show.

SPEAKER_03 44:26

A cabaret show.

SPEAKER_00 44:27

I'm writing a new cabaret show. And a cabaret show, for those of you who don't know, it's just basically an intimate um it's an intimate show through song and story. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 44:36

You know, I think you still do it with Billy Heller.

SPEAKER_00 44:38

I yes, I did it with Billy Heller. Um so now I have to find a mu mu a new musical director because Billy's off doing other stuff. Yeah, he's doing great stuff. So I'm trying to find a musical director, but I'm finally doing a show um and it's gonna be about my mother.

unknown 44:52

Wow.

SPEAKER_00 44:53

My mother's been gone twenty years.

SPEAKER_01 44:55

Wow.

Harmony Obsession And Teachers Who Stay

SPEAKER_00 44:55

And I'm ready. I'm ready to feel the feels, I'm ready to share, and I'm ready to celebrate her. And um, it's gonna be called Unapologetic. Cool. Because that's exactly what she was. Um amazing. So um so I'm looking to do that in the spring in Manhattan, right around Mother's Day. Oh, good.

SPEAKER_03 45:15

So let's come check that out.

SPEAKER_00 45:16

Yeah. I think did I come to one of those already? I'm sure you did. I did um I did one called the uh family history a couple of years well, many years ago, and it kind of like about the family. And then my next show was The Dog Walking Diva.

SPEAKER_03 45:27

Right. And then you do a Billy Joel one.

SPEAKER_00 45:29

The Trials and Tribulations of Being a Pet Care Professional through Song and Story. And then I did um and then one day we we were at Thanksgiving at my p my dad's house after my mom passed, and we got in the car to go home, and John I get in the driver's seat, John closes the door and he was like, Can you just fucking do the show already? I'm like, What are you talking about? He goes, You need to do a show called Daddy's Little Girl. Right. And you need to do songs that your father wants to hear you sing. And I said, Okay. And you did it for your father. And I did. He was there. Yep, okay.

SPEAKER_03 45:56

Yeah, that's great.

SPEAKER_00 45:57

And I won an I won an award for that show.

SPEAKER_03 45:59

You did?

SPEAKER_00 46:00

Yep. The um Broadway uh Broadway World Award for Best Female Vocalist in Manhattan for the Cabarets. And then I did the Billy Joel.

SPEAKER_02 46:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 46:07

And then I haven't done one in a while because dad was, you know, the fire under my ass to do a lot of the shows. So now I'm ready to do um another show in the spring. So I'm really excited about that.

SPEAKER_03 46:16

I remember when you when your dad passed, I brought that up that you was able to see that. Yep. I I mean that that's big.

SPEAKER_00 46:23

And I feel like now, like he's he's been gone eight years now, and I feel like Is it eight years? It's eight years. I know. It feels like yesterday, but I feel like I've I did those shows for him. I also did them for myself and my you know my own musical. I don't know what you mean, yeah. But um but he was uh he would be like, baby, when's your next show? Honey, when's your next show? Hun, when is when's your next when are you doing? Wha when's your next show?

SPEAKER_03 46:45

I'm like, Dad, give me a Well I mean, but that's for a parent that's got I mean, I'm speaking as a you know it that's it was incredible for him and me to share.

SPEAKER_00 46:58

It was great.

SPEAKER_03 46:58

Honestly, if if like I think I think I told you this, if my daughter had a show, and no pressure on her, but if I she did a show where she sang and she called it uh Daddy's little girl's little girl, I would be okay. I can now I can die. I've done my job. Yep. It's all that's is that's kind of where it goes. That's as good as it can be.

SPEAKER_00 47:18

That's the whole point you know that's that's what they live for. Right. They live for us.

SPEAKER_03 47:25

Well, not all, but I mean not all of them. Some of them have fucked up.

SPEAKER_00 47:28

I was lucky enough to have that, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 47:30

You were lucky enough.

SPEAKER_00 47:31

And you saw him all the time at showcases. He came to the showcases. He even crashed weddings.

SPEAKER_03 47:35

Right.

SPEAKER_00 47:35

And and he always crashed the wedding at the um the place, the Milleridge Inn, because that that the setup for that room is conducive to wedding crashers.

SPEAKER_03 47:46

Right. That's right.

SPEAKER_00 47:47

It's a cut that's because the wall is open in the back of the band.

SPEAKER_03 47:50

That's right.

SPEAKER_00 47:50

So every time I was there, I'd be like, Dad, you need to come crash it. And so funny, um, the Matre D who worked there, her name was Pamela. And he and she met she was she was the Matre D for a long time there, whenever we were playing, and of course, he charmed her to and if her name was Pamela, forget it. He was in love with her for her name, and she so every time every time I came there, she'd be like, Oh, hi b is your dad coming? What does he want for dinner?

SPEAKER_03 48:16

Oh, see, but you and you could have got a real asshole too, was like the opposite in that. Exactly.

SPEAKER_00 48:21

And that was the other thing I wanted to mention about the whole wedding band stuff. It's like you know, you feel invisible and you don't feel appreciated a lot of the times because of the disconnect between the guests and the band and stuff. But you know who's always fucking there? The uh the waitresses, the bar staff, and and and and the maitre D's and stuff. And like when they see us, they're happy.

SPEAKER_03 48:42

Yeah, because it's gonna make their their lives easier.

SPEAKER_00 48:45

Yeah, and it's gonna be we're gonna be into they're gonna enjoy themselves a little bit more than the DJ or a shitty fucking face.

SPEAKER_03 48:51

Right.

SPEAKER_00 48:51

Right. You know? So that makes me feel good too when I know that I'm going to a place that that we kind of, you know, everyone knows your name. Like it's like cheers, you know?

SPEAKER_03 48:59

What are the places now? Like what are the what catering holes are there now, even?

SPEAKER_00 49:03

Um the mansion at Oh, Bourne Mansion? No, Born Mansion is always great.

SPEAKER_03 49:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 49:08

But the mansion at Oyster Bay, which is on the golf course, um Oyster Bay. You know, Ohica. You know, it's like that whole line of uh, you know, Fox Hollow, Crest Hollow.

SPEAKER_03 49:18

Oh, on Woodbury. What is that? Jerker Turk? Yeah. Woodbury Road.

SPEAKER_00 49:22

Yeah, that whole kind of strip there with all those cratering holes, those are all great places. Um the place in um on the beach in Huntington, Crescent Beach Club. Oh. Everyone's so appreciative of that. You know, there's a lot in Westbury Manor.

SPEAKER_03 49:36

That was the place where where I think Donna said, Oh, he's dead. Oh, I think that I think that was the place. I'm pretty sure.

SPEAKER_00 49:45

Yeah, man. I wish I I wish I wrote down a lot of the shit that I have um witnessed on the bandstand. Because uh because I'd have I'd have a fucking major mo Oh, and I'm I'm thinking about doing an another show called The Wedding Singer. Oh, why wouldn't I, you know a song, I mean a show through song and story about that experience.

SPEAKER_03 50:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 50:06

I'll tell you Go ahead. I'm also thinking after the after my mother show, after Unapologetic, I think I'm gonna bring back some some nice comedy and I'm gonna do Oh yeah, weren't you doing comedy for a while? Well, yeah. Oh, I did a couple of comedy things, yeah. But I'm gonna write it another show. I'm gonna do the dog walking diva number two, picking it up.

SPEAKER_03 50:23

Picking it up. Right. Of course. That's great.

SPEAKER_00 50:28

I'll keep you posted on all of this stuff.

SPEAKER_03 50:30

Wait, I was just gonna ask you something and now I forgot what it was. Shit. You cut me off and then I cut you off. What was it? Oh my god. I'm not sure. I hate this getting old shit, man. I fucking forget. I know. How old are you? I'm 64. What? Yeah. You know what I have to do now? Like, I have to take I have to I take blood pressure medication. Yeah. And then I take it at I have to, you know, I take it at night. And then I'm like, at night, I'm like, did I take my medication and I have to go check my toothbrush if it's wet? That means I brushed and I took my That's how fucking old. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_00 51:04

Dude, 64 is not fucking old.

SPEAKER_03 51:06

It's just, well, I'm not. I've never been this old before.

SPEAKER_00 51:09

I don't mean either. I know. I know. I know. But you know, age really is a number. Like, I'm telling you, like, I I I remember asking my dad, like, on his 75th birthday, I'm like, how does it feel to be 75? And he's like, he's like, I'm still like 28 in my head.

SPEAKER_03 51:22

That's exactly right. And that's that's a cruel reality.

War Stories From The Bandstand

SPEAKER_00 51:26

I used to I used to when I was fucking knee. He had three knee replacements.

SPEAKER_03 51:30

Right. Okay. But what I'm talking about is like I was a very act how's how can I put this? I was like I was I dated a lot of women when I was young. And I used to see older couples who ha would would date, whatever, and I would say to myself, now I wonder now if you get old, are you still attracted to like the younger person and I'm attracted to right now? Or do you just there's your also your preference age with you and it doesn't. It that's a cruel thing as well that you still I still look at gender-wise, it's fine. No, I mean not gender. I mean but like you still think men age uh much better than women. No, I'm not married men.

SPEAKER_00 52:14

Dude, men age m better than women. I think older men are more attractive than older women.

SPEAKER_03 52:20

Uh yeah, I guess so. I don't know. I I don't know. I ha I have to deal with people who are twenty years my junior because my kids play with kids whose fathers are twenty years younger than me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. In fact, my daughter got off the bus one day and she was crying and said, What's wrong with you? She goes, We were talking on the bus and everybody was talking about their father's age, and I said mine's sixty three, and they're like, Sixty-three!

SPEAKER_00 52:38

He's gonna be dead soon. And you said that you weren't, right?

SPEAKER_03 52:42

I said no. I said, No, it's good, I'm gonna be here for like two more years or something.

SPEAKER_00 52:48

I mean, and that that is upsetting to a child.

SPEAKER_03 52:51

They don't get that.

SPEAKER_00 52:52

They don't get it. And I said, and my father promised me that he was gonna live to a hundred, so I'm fucking pissed.

SPEAKER_03 52:59

I'm pissed at Chris for for dying before he was supposed to do the podcast and he didn't do it. No, fuck. And you know what I'm realizing is that he was such a good good hearted person. He was. He was really and he used to say this I'm gonna do it. I'm just afraid I'm I don't wanna I don't want to hurt anybody's I don't want to piss anybody off.

SPEAKER_00 53:18

Well, I hope I didn't piss anybody off tonight. I mean, whatever. I you know it is what it is. Our our lives are what they are, it's what we make it. Right. And um And you know what, man? I I I could be so upset and frustrated about whatever the fuck I'm frustrated about, whether it's big or small. And I'm happy to say that I guess like now with age and some wisdom, I come full circle really fucking quick.

SPEAKER_03 53:45

Yeah. Yeah. And I am so grateful. That's the good thing about being getting old is that you're not going to be able to do it. I'm so grateful for everything.

SPEAKER_00 53:50

And I come back quick. I I don't stay mad or annoyed very quick very um long because life is literally too short.

SPEAKER_03 53:59

Yeah, and you know what I've been doing lately, which is gr which I I have to start I have to keep doing it. Like, like I start to get into my head where I'm like, shh fucking had it with everything. Right, and then yourself. And myself, and I start listening to the stuff that I really like, and it it's like uh brings you back.

SPEAKER_00 54:16

It's I literally go, oh God, that's and I feel like when I'm so busy with the band in the fucking heat of the battle of the season, I don't listen to other music because I'm just learning stuff for the gigs. And like now like we saw a fucking original band last Saturday night. I was like, holy shit, this is amazing.

SPEAKER_02 54:34

Yeah. Who'd you see?

SPEAKER_00 54:36

Uh Mitch Weiss. Mitch Weiss. And every like every time the song would end, the guy that he'd be like, he'd turn around and be like, What's next? And I'm like, um and I was like, you should be called Mitch Weiss in the what's next? And he then was like, yes. He's like, you're s you're you're hired for the marketing.

SPEAKER_02 54:53

For the marketing.

SPEAKER_00 54:54

Um Yeah, I mean, and and and he has such a positive message. Just a positive every song is a positive message.

SPEAKER_03 55:00

See, that's that is the difference.

SPEAKER_00 55:03

And the musicianship was fucking killer.

SPEAKER_03 55:05

Good, right. That that's the thing between the difference between our profession and somebody and somebody who's like a dentist. I thought unless I'm got that wrong. I don't think so, though. I think either it's it's I think it's a part of you. My friend Kenny's daughter, I always bring her up on these podcasts. He Kenny's a guitar player that I do a tr fusion trio with. His daughter is was up for a Grammy last year. She's a she's a she writes with Hans Zimmer. Hans Zimmer did uh Schwerschank Redemption.

SPEAKER_02 55:32

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 55:33

And so she's writing, she did she's doing The Simpsons and uh, you know, he sends me stuff with her playing piano and uh uh Sarah Borelis is singing. Oh my god. I mean it's unbelievable. The the one of the series she did, the end credits she wrote the music for the whole series, and the end credits uh Barbara Streisand sings. Oh my god. And she's really doing great. And uh, you know, he tells me He he to she went to piano lessons, but really it's just it was just born in her.

SPEAKER_00 56:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 56:01

You know what I mean? It's like it just flows through.

SPEAKER_00 56:03

I and I feel this, I feel I agree with you, but I'm waiting to tap into my fucking shit. I want more of my fucking shit to come out. But I also feel like I need to put myself more in those situations that it can be brought out.

SPEAKER_02 56:17

Do you know?

SPEAKER_00 56:18

Like I write with Skylar Deal.

SPEAKER_02 56:19

Yeah. You know?

SPEAKER_00 56:20

Like I need to go, I need to do more stuff with. I still listen to that tune.

SPEAKER_03 56:23

What's the tune I played on? Um Dreams Come True. Yeah, Dreams Come True. That's a good tune.

SPEAKER_00 56:30

So yeah, everyone should check out our song that we did together, which is um true.

SPEAKER_03 56:34

Oh, Secret Language.

SPEAKER_00 56:35

A secret language.

SPEAKER_03 56:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 56:36

And also Dreams Come True.

SPEAKER_03 56:37

Yep. Is that can you get that on uh iTunes? Dream Comes True Dreams Come True. I'd put it definitely can get secret language on there.

SPEAKER_00 56:43

Yeah. I think and that's another thing that John and I need to do. We need to put our shit out there. We went to Nashville when we did Dreams Come True, we have at least five other killer tunes that no one has ever heard yet. You should put them out. I'm just like, let them go, let them go out into the universe. Because, you know. And who knows? Maybe if we submit them into, you know, if we get the right avenue, we can submit them and they can fucking pay it, give us checks because they're on a show. You know? That it that it that's perfect for. Who know? Who knows? Because there's so much content on all the streaming platforms of um shows. And I love watching good shows. And every time there's a great song that comes on, I'm like, and I rewind and I put my little Shazam thing on, I'm like, who's that? Who's that? Who's that? You know?

SPEAKER_03 57:27

Well, it's always the music that makes the show. I agree.

SPEAKER_00 57:30

Well, there's also acting and writing.

SPEAKER_03 57:31

Yeah, I'm saying, but you know, some of the stuff would be diff way different without the music.

SPEAKER_00 57:36

I agree.

SPEAKER_03 57:37

That's definitely stuff that uh Kara does. She writes very I don't know what you ethereal? Very well, very like appropriate. You know, I she's like a she's twenty eight years old.

SPEAKER_00 57:47

She's like a you know, yeah, a virtuoso. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 57:50

Uh it's it's crazy.

SPEAKER_00 57:52

It is crazy.

SPEAKER_03 57:53

All right, so I think we're at the end of this now. Are we? I think we had enough shit. We said enough shit.

SPEAKER_00 57:58

I don't think I've said anything. I have said nothing of uh meaning. Nothing.

SPEAKER_03 58:05

That's not true.

SPEAKER_00 58:06

Well, it's it was so nice to be here with you, John. Honestly.

SPEAKER_03 58:11

I'm so excited. I've been doing this for three years now. It's your episode twenty-nine.

SPEAKER_00 58:16

And like I said, that's my age.

SPEAKER_03 58:17

Twenty-nine. Right. Forever. Okay. And and uh I never had a never had a girl. Well mainly because most of most of the time I gripe about singers because they show up late and you know they have such a better gig than me.

Family, Community, And Being Seen

SPEAKER_00 58:29

Well, that just proves it. I'm the coolest chick you know. That's it, yeah. I'm the coolest chick singer, you know.

SPEAKER_03 58:33

But like every band you know, the drummer and bass play get fired tomorrow. Nobody gives a shit. That's not true. If the blonde singer doesn't show up, though, like where's the blonde singer?

SPEAKER_00 58:42

And that is my claim to fame. People know me because of my fucking hair.

SPEAKER_03 58:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 58:46

And that's I'll take it. I'll take it.

SPEAKER_03 58:48

It's job security, right?

SPEAKER_00 58:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 58:50

It is.

SPEAKER_00 58:52

Also, I can sing in tune.

SPEAKER_03 58:54

Uh yes, you can. Yeah, you're one of my new uh listen, you if you couldn't sing in tune, you wouldn't be here tonight.

SPEAKER_00 59:00

Oh, I know. John was like, I wouldn't have fucking married you. If you couldn't sing. He says it all the time. And I'm like, yeah, thank you.

SPEAKER_03 59:09

Well, he's he's an honest, he's being honest. Holy shit.

SPEAKER_00 59:12

And I do also say I mean, whatever. You know how we compliment each other now after 26 years of being together? We compliment each other by saying, um um he'll be like, oh, I did this, I did this. And I'm like, yeah, you know why? Because you're not a stupid fucking asshole. That's how we compliment each other now. He's like, I'm like, babe, I did this. And he was like, yeah, because you're not a stupid fucking asshole. I'm serious. I am not even kidding. That's how we like tell each other we love each other now.

SPEAKER_03 59:39

Oh man.

SPEAKER_00 59:40

And with that, I mean, that is the best ending to a show ever.

SPEAKER_03 59:43

All right. Well, thanks for coming. Thanks for maybe I'll have you again back in the like twenty six years.

SPEAKER_00 59:51

Well, how about we do something um maybe with John and John? Yeah, and we'll do a song or two, you know.

SPEAKER_03 59:57

Yeah, that's a good idea.

SPEAKER_00 59:58

Yeah, why not?

SPEAKER_03 1:00:00

Pay though.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:00

That's okay. You have beer.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:02

Yeah, I have beer.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:04

And a pool. Let's do it in this room.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:06

Yeah, that's it. Yeah, let's do it. Alright, cool.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:08

All right. All right, man. I love you, brother. Love you too.