Unfazed Under Fire Podcast

From Impostor Syndrome to Inner Sovereignty

• David Craig Utts, Leadership Alchemist • Season 3 • Episode 17

Share episode

What if you didn’t have to earn your place every day? What if you could lead from a place that’s unshakable—because it’s already yours?

In this final episode of our Homecoming series, we explore what it actually looks like to live and lead from your integrated self—not as a moment of insight or performance peak, but as a new normal.

You’ll hear:

  • How the Resilient Leader Method creates a permanent shift, not a fleeting state
  • Why many executives confuse empathy with over-functioning—and how to lead with compassionate clarity
  • What changes when reactivity disappears and coherence becomes your natural frequency
  • How to detect and release energy that doesn’t belong to you
  • Why most leaders are chasing what they already own—and how to stop

The pressure has risen. The system keeps asking for more. Now give yourself the return—to clarity, to sovereignty, to you.

This isn’t about doing more. It’s about reclaiming your leadership from the inside out.

Connect with Our Co-Hosts:

- Anatoly Yakorev: https://www.linkedin.com/in/yakorev/ 

- Ryan McShane: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ryan-mcshane-743382a/


 🌐 Learn more: resilientleadermethod.com
📩 Contact: david@davidcraigutts.com

Unfazed Under Fire Podcast - Host: David Craig Utts, Leadership Alchemist

Our podcast is also available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and Amazon Music

To access additional platforms, follow this link:
https://www.unfazedunderfirepodcast.online

Speaker 1:

Welcome to Unfazed Under Fire, a podcast designed to elevate your leadership and amplify your impact. Each episode offers valuable insights to help you transform your vision into reality, cultivate high-performing cultures that attract top talents, and navigate the complexities of today's uncertain, chaotic world with confidence and clarity. Now tuning into your needs, here's your host and moderator, seasoned executive coach and leadership alchemist, david Craig Utz.

Speaker 2:

So if you're still trying to overcome imposter syndrome, outrun the pressure or earn your place every day by pushing harder, this conversation is for you, because, no matter how much success you've had, if it's driven by fear of slipping or the need to justify your role, the wait is costing you more than you know. Welcome back to Unfaced Under Fire, where we challenge the broken systems, leadership development and explore what it really means to lead with clarity, courage and heart. Not by trying harder, but by coming home. In this homecoming series, we've been peeling back the layers beyond pushing, beyond coping, down to the core that fuels real leadership your unshakable center Now, that place within you that isn't stressed. Your unshakable center Now, that place within you that isn't stressed, performing or proving. That place that's quietly waiting for you to return. This is the place we all crave to return to, and when we do, everything changes.

Speaker 2:

Now this is part three in the series. In parts one and two, we covered the cost of the disconnection in today's world, the longing leaders carry for something deeper, and what it actually feels like to reconnect to this center, your natural state of flow, presence and wholeness. But today we're asking what does it really look like to live from this place as an executive every day, and even when the world tries to rip you away from it. As always, I'm joined by my co-creators in this journey, anatoly Yakarev and Ryan McShane. Gentlemen, welcome back and thank you, as always.

Speaker 2:

So today let's cut below the surface and start by exploring the practical benefits of this homecoming to executives. What does it look like when the homecoming shift sticks and becomes a way of being and operating? I really want to get real. What shifts in an executive's perspective? What does it bring to their ability to execute and meet their daily challenges? How does it help influence those around them? And, at the end of the day, how does it foster greater well-being so executives can thrive in these times and are able to truly enjoy their wealth and success? So I dropped that big one over there to you, gentlemen. Any thoughts on the practical benefits in real time for executives day to day.

Speaker 3:

So here's the idea, based on the observations of people who used to work with those executives that I talked to and they said, look, we can only tell that the level of reactivity is completely gone and people acquire that level of balance when they actually are both very attentive, they demonstrate a lot of mental clarity, but they're also very fluid and very relaxed, which again everybody picked that up. So I was like thinking, okay, so these are the people who direct the report to those executives and they see that deep change. But finally they found that unsettling because they were saying, like, is it the little before the storm or something's going to happen? You know he's going to bite our heads off, or is it going to be like that for the coming day or two? I said I don't know. You guys, you should be watching these people.

Speaker 3:

So they were reporting this to me, not just because they wanted me to know, because I never told them what I did, but they just said this is really interesting because if I am a direct report to this executive, actually I begin to like the guy. I never liked the guy to begin with, but I'm beginning to like that person. There is something about that person with that level of calmness and that level of presence that, despite my initial or previous experience, I begin to change my position. So there's something happening there energetically. So that was, like you know, the words of direct reports. So I'm just trying to speak, not from my experience, but I'm trying to use the observations of other people.

Speaker 4:

And I can also add that, while I haven't gone through the reset, just my weekly exposure to Anatoly has lifted me in a way. That is something that we've talked about in prior episodes, and I can even notice in those experiences my diminishment of reactivity and greater discernment. It's like I zoom back out and I'm the observer of what's taking place not necessarily the character that's being affected by what's taking place and therefore being very reactive. I see this in my professional life in terms of what I'm doing, you know learning and studying and you know delivering training and things of that nature. But I can also see it in my personal life.

Speaker 4:

You know, when I'm out on the golf course, you know we all have those moments where we hit the bad shot, we don't feel good about it, we want to blow up, you know, throw a club or a ball or something or just yell. But I'm recognizing that those instances are occurring less and less and in fact I'm seeing myself in the instance of saying, yeah, that really bothered me. Now I've got to let it go. I can't let this be absorbed, because as soon as I absorb it, as soon as I fall into that trap of amygdala or emotional hijack, then it's going to affect the rest of my game, and I think that's a good message for the professionals as well.

Speaker 4:

As soon as you get baited into those arguments in the work environment or you're triggered emotionally from a colleague and you absorb that information, chances are the rest of your day is probably ruined. So because you allowed it to absorb, you've been emotionally hijacked. Your central nervous system is thrown off as a result of that, and if you can have a methodology or a way of not getting into that, that throws off your thinking, your ability to relate to yourself and others, as well as your performance, I mean, that's powerful stuff and that's what's starting to happen with me just through mere exposure to Anatoly and David on a weekly basis, and so that's why I'm so excited to really create a permanence around this through the reset which I'm going to be experiencing next week.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, the reset does bring people into that place of home that we're speaking about and it reveals that which is already there and people, as we've said in previous shows, taste this place from time to time. We all have days when we are connected to what we call flow or connected to that place of center in us, and those that are there, reset or not, report what you're saying. There is this drop in reactivity, which is a key marker for the development of leadership. So, when you're in this place, you're in a more natural place of leading, which is not reactive. It's cutting through the fog. If you will, things bounce off you or, as you said, ryan, people can adapt very quickly or adjust very quickly. That's happening, I'm observing it. Let me just drop that and be focused. That in itself is not a small gift, right? The ability to say wait a minute. That's not going to serve me in this situation or in this conversation. Let me refocus. And they're able to find it because it's right there, right when they're in home, when they're in that place of flow, they're able to reconnect and, manitouli, as you just said, people begin to resonate with you more. Well, why is that? Because everybody has this place that is more coherent than the place that they're living from.

Speaker 2:

Most of the time and we talked about this before the more coherent, grounded, centered place is what the brain craves. So if you look at the research on rapport, for example, communication is 97% nonverbal. So when you're interacting with people and you're coming from this place of home, they are cohering. They begin to mirror that with you and begin to come into tune. Also, even with difficult people tend to cut through the BS and say, oh, listen, okay, god, that you're upset, let's talk about what the real issue is here. Tend to cut through the BS and say, oh, listen, okay, god that you're upset, let's talk about what the real issue is here. You get cut through the noise of all that and don't get caught up in other people's drama, not in a judgmental way, but because you come back to a place of center that calls people back in that center and you're able to orchestrate those conversations, if you will, naturally, to stay there.

Speaker 2:

We've had some executives that have had this experience of going through the reset who have been overly empathetic with their direct reports.

Speaker 2:

They tend to give a lot to them and when that happens, that really supports the burnout trend that we're in.

Speaker 2:

That puts this wet blanket over or drains you fundamentally, and it's not that leaders lose that, but I say they come to a greater sense of compassion versus empathy, which does not drain you, and they also don't let that overtake them and become primary in the conversation, so they're able to connect, to empathize or be compassionate at a level that supports the person they're having the conversation with, but they're not overemphasizing that. So I want you to take that a little bit from there, because you talk about the dangers of being overly empathetic and why this whole term of empathetic leadership may be actually doing more harm than good. But then I want you to follow it up with okay, yet we have to be more human. Okay, yet we have to be more human. Being more human and connecting to an upset or concern in a way that is real and genuinely connects with others is also important. Talk a little bit about the dangers of being overly empathetic and how do you balance that out?

Speaker 3:

Well, it's interesting that the industry has been like really promoting this idea that leaders should show their humane side of themselves and be more empathetic, which is like really to tell the truth that, more involved and engaged, but the truth is people don't really care about that. This is just too much energy that doesn't provide a lot of outcome for either party involved. The idea is that a lot of people were looking for ways to simplify how you want to position yourself at your workplace. Do you want to look accessible by your direct reports? But again, here's the danger, because a lot of people, especially people not really performing well, they're using that to their own advantage. If you're too accessible, if you're too empathetic, that will swallow your entire arm and you won't be able to get anything done Like with children, right, you show some weaknesses and it will be exploited Again.

Speaker 3:

It's a huge energetic drain to maintain that level of emotional connectivity, which doesn't really serve anyone. It doesn't really serve the business. You've got things to do and stuff like that. Yeah well, you could explore that, but you could do it on your terms and, david, you made a very good point. If you operate from a place of compassion, this is not this energy draining thing at all. If you come across as being generally compassionate but with clear boundaries of what is expected, people learn to respect that and value that a lot more than you having your conversation by a water cooler just trying to build rapport with people in your office. Look, it's too much investment. But again, that investment is not going anywhere. So that's on the energetic side of it.

Speaker 3:

Also, in terms of building a certain perception for leaders, it's very important to demonstrate that they do have a humane side of their character. But at the same time, those leaders decide how much of that they can show and under what conditions. Otherwise, if you are being a leader, you allow yourself to get sucked into some meaningless conversation or get like, really get bounced around by whoever is engaged with you. It's very easy to lose track energetically of what you're trying to accomplish, especially if you operate from a position that you need to get things done and you've got human resources available to you, so you have to manage everything in such a way that you're not drained by lunchtime. So how do you do enough? And that's where a lot of people don't understand how do you show enough humanity, so to speak, but at the same time you don't really cube yourself in the process.

Speaker 4:

What we're talking about is framing this, and I understand the notion that leaders need to be more empathetic, from a standpoint of what we've traditionally grown up with is a style of management. We don't care how it gets done, as long as it gets done. I don't care if I burn up and chew you out, and if it gets done at the end of the day, that's all that matters. And so that was really devoid of any notion of empathy in humanity. So that's one side of the polarity. The other side is what Anatoly is talking about, with that extreme empathy where you're constantly drained, pouring out your heart for other people, and what we're really talking about is that balance between the two, and that balance is only going to be in place if you have some healthy boundaries around that that Anatoly had talked about. So I think it's important to frame it in a way that a lot of our executives are hearing about it.

Speaker 4:

Wait, we got to get things done at the end of the day, but yet you need to be empathetic and compassionate.

Speaker 4:

Where do I go? Where do I align my energy? How do I focus on this, and that's what Anatoly is describing is there needs to be a focus on this number one to consciously evaluate how you're approaching these things. Otherwise, you just operate from your conditioning so that's very important for our executives to recognize but also having those healthy boundaries which keep you balanced and making sure that, at the end of the day, yes, we are still accomplishing those goals, but we're not sacrificing our people in order to do that. We're operating from compassion and relationship and support. That is so critical, not just to the finite results that we're looking for, but for the infinite game that we're playing that Simon Sinek talked about in his book is we've got to take care of people. We've got to be conscious of not just the journey and the destination, but how we get there, and it's that how that is so critical to relationship, to energy, to how we show up at the end of the day in order to do the work that we do.

Speaker 2:

It's coming back to this place of coming from home, when you're resting in this core place in you that we all have, regardless of whether you do a reset or not. This is a place to reconnect to, because we talked about in the first show, about disconnecting from this place, the reason why we're so exhausted, the reason why we're trying to figure out if it's empathy or whether I should be harder a whole issue of psychological safety, all those things that we're trying to do. That's just adding weight because we're trying to figure it out. When you're coming from this core place of home, there's no figuring out why Number one things people report after they do the reset I'm present all the time and I'm not as reactive, and it points back to something. When you're not as reactive, as Ryan said earlier, there's something else that's operating, that you can trust more, that you're grounded in more, and so when you're coming from this place of home, it isn't trying to figure out should I be empathetic, should I do this, should I do that? I wasn't empathetic enough after the meeting. What do they say in that HR meeting about psychological safety and what I should do? You're not doing anything that because you're coming from a real place that is more humane and is also on point with what you're there to do as a leader.

Speaker 2:

And I really like this distinction that you know I opened and you kind of landed on around empathy versus compassion. I want to put a little bit of a bow on that. Sympathy is trying to imagine walking in their shoes or trying to be in their shoes, which is a mental game, because you can't really always understand what it's like to walk in somebody else's shoes and if you do, you're a bit delusional. You can't understand the mystery of another person's experience. But to me, compassion is about. I understand it can relate to what you're experiencing because I've been something, through something similar as a human being. You're self-referential in compassion because you can feel what that must be like because you've experienced it yourself. That's different. You're more in your own experience, relating to the other's experience, rather than trying to be in their experience.

Speaker 3:

The idea of this concept of going back home. Ryan had a different way of describing it more like becoming an observer, when you're shifting seats and you're no longer driving, but you're kind of taking a step back and you view the situation from a totally different vantage point, which means that there's no bad energy involved, there's no judgment, there is none of that. You are in a place of focus and calm, and that could be compared to be more like reconnecting with your home base from which you can operate, regroup and decide what you want to do before you do anything foolish right or you react Well, one thing I want to add that people don't really think like it's a bulletproof state. There is one thing which is very difficult to manage and it has nothing to do with how you know developed you are. We're talking about the energetic exchange between people. If people show up and they're negatively charged, there is nothing you can do to protect yourself from their negative energy. You just have to find a way to process that energy, to process it out of your system.

Speaker 3:

So that's why I want to make a point of that. So, being in that state, you can fall back home and to operate from that point of non-judgmental state, but at the same time you have to be aware. Point of like non-judgmental state, but at the same time you have to be aware. Why am I feeling stressed right now? I've got no reason to be stressed. Well, there is somebody I'm talking to and they are like really trying to deal with that level of stress, but it gets translated somehow during the exchange and I get kind of infected by it.

Speaker 3:

So that's why I just want to make a point that, even though you could be in your home state and you could be perfectly fine, but that alien energy that you're feeling, which is not part of your thinking or behaving, you just have to flush it out of your system because it's not part of who you are. And this is something that's really important, because being bulletproof is one thing, but you're not bulletproof to any energy from other people. That's really important, because being bulletproof is one thing, but you're not bulletproof to any energy from other people that's coming your way. So you just have to deal with this wisely. If you feel like there's something part of your energetic makeup and it doesn't belong to you, you'll find a way of gently discharging and getting rid of that energy because it's not serving you. It's not a part of who you are and it doesn't need to be present, but, being in that home state, you have to be there first.

Speaker 4:

What you're describing really comes down to the person's level of consciousness to recognize what energy that they're feeling and why they're feeling that particular energy. An unconscious person, they're swept away by that energy and they don't know why and they don't observe it, they don't think about it, they just know that that energy has taken them in a certain direction. The very conscious person, the very aware, present person recognizes hey, I feel something, why do I feel something? And they start to process that immediately, to recognize are these my feelings or am I absorbing the negativity of someone else? And what do I do when I do absorb that negative energy? And that's what you're describing as being able to process that.

Speaker 4:

And it all comes down to the condition of your level of consciousness to be able to do that or not be able to do that. And that's what I've experienced in my limited exposure is just being that much more aware, much more conscious and much more recognizing of my own energy levels and what's going on around me and how my energy levels shift, based on the persons that I may be interacting with as well. And as a leader and executive, you're interacting with people all the time and, as we know, energy is vital to what we're doing and how we're doing what we're doing, whether the person's going to feel like taking on a new initiative or being motivated to achieve that particular goal or even change their mindset around something and as leaders, we're always influencing and persuading people to do something, not least of which is oftentimes ourselves. So being the observer, being conscious of those energies, has a huge impact on how we show up every day and how we relate and interact with others around us.

Speaker 2:

Even when this home state becomes a default, the world doesn't stop pulling at you. You don't stop running into difficult people. You still have reactions to things. You're still influenced by the energy around you. So this is not like ut things. You're still influenced by the energy around you. So this is not like utopia. You're still human and there's still things that come up in memory and pull you down the rabbit hole a little bit. The difference is you recover much faster. You're more attuned as you just said, ryan, to what's going on in you, and we have a lot of leaders that are walking around and I would say a majority of them that are just eating the proverbial shit and not realizing it and it's affecting them and then later on they blast off at somebody who doesn't deserve it, because we're not living in our full experience and in our bodies we're just head up or neck up, and that's the challenge. But when you reconnect to home, you're in your holistic self and you're more attuned to the subtler things that are going on. And this is part of integrating into that home place right and resting in it so that you can continue to process. You're still going to face things that maybe happened when you were young or whatever a few pieces that are going to show up, but this place is a place you can resolve them. When you're home, you're connected to that core place. That's kind of like that processing plan of those things. And, if you beautiful thing is because you're more aware, more present to what you are experiencing moment to moment. And it may not be the moment I got to look at this later, because right now I got to get stuff done but you make note of that and you're able to understand that later and process that and release it. And in my experience those things are a gift, they're their own kind of serendipity, especially if I start facing something two or three times that's very similar and it's still getting to me. I've got to sit down and this is where a lot of the processes that are taught mindfulness, meditation, reflection, journaling come to your service. Where before you're not connected to this core self, they feel like something I have to do. It seems to add some value, but I don't know why I'm doing it sometimes I'm just doing it to do it. Now, those same practices that were taught a little bit the cart before the horse come to your beck and call and allow you to process things more effectively, and there's a lot of good things out there to do that.

Speaker 2:

So, getting back and wrapping up, what I asked before is I think this speaks directly to enjoying your wealth and your success more. You're able to be present when you're where you're at, if you're home, if you're out with your friends playing tennis or you're out going to watch a movie. You're enjoying those things a lot more. You're not thinking about stuff that has happened in your day as much and if you do, maybe it's something you have to process. Pointing back to this conversation like, why is that bothering me so much? But you have a way to bring your awareness to it, to kind of get an insight into what that's about the whole idea that the more present you are, that's a healing force itself A lot of times.

Speaker 2:

It doesn't mean I have to get down and understand exactly where this came from. It may be helpful to do that, but by putting awareness on it and say, getting to a real, direct conversation with yourself is what triggered in me what just happened and how do I soften that trigger? What's the trigger? And by just putting attention on it, especially when you're in this home place. You're able to kind of melt those things through just being attentive to them.

Speaker 4:

That point's very well made, that it is the actual presence, that awareness that defeats the repeating of those cycles, that unconscious conditioning that reinforces our traumas. At the end of the day, you know and and you know, anatoly talked about this that hardwiring. We continuously reinforce that hardwiring when we don't consciously examine why we think the way we think and why we feel the way we feel, and things of that nature. And so you know, that presence, that awareness, that consciousness avoids that. And what's really kind of remarkable in my mind and simple just the same, is what we're talking about is evolutionary growth. When we stop repeating those same patterns, in that moment we have that opportunity to evolve, to grow, to be fuller and more of who we are and to shed that conditioning that has only been designed for self-protection purposes. And once we start getting away from that, then we really step into what is our fullness of capability and our sovereign self that we often refer to and talk about. David.

Speaker 2:

And in the belief series we talked about identity. So when we're unconscious and unaware, we identify with even our reactivity. That's the way I am right. And when we believe that's the way we are, we're deepening that groove in our reactivity. That's the way I am right. And when we believe that's the way I am, we're deepening that groove in our nervous system that says that's true. And when we believe that's true, it is so.

Speaker 2:

And when we come home and we're connected to that presence and that awareness, we recognize oh, that's a perturbation in my system that's not serving me. Let me understand where that's coming from. So that work of awareness and putting attention on things doesn't miraculously go away, because that's part of being human baby. It is ongoing deepening and coming home. There's one version of that. But the more you stay grounded in that place of home, there's more deepening that can occur.

Speaker 2:

And I think this is one of the things why we have resilient leadership coaching after the reset, because we want to introduce people into a process that enables them, once they're done with the entire method, to deepen and go into deeper recesses of greater gifts, greater resourcefulness, greater confidence, greater passion and enjoyment. These are not some end in place in those things we can always deepen our experience of presence, of clarity, of focus, of connection to deeper gifts and resources we didn't even know we had, or acknowledging the ones we do have. And by acknowledging the ones we do have we move towards mastery, which is what the greatest gift in life can be, is to be on the path of self-mastery. And this is not mastering a particular skill, although it can be. It's mastering ourselves, not to make sure we get through the day, but through enjoyment of that and deepening of that. But through enjoyment of that and deepening of that. And the most profound leaders are highly integrative and unitive in their ability to do that. They walk in the room and their very executive presence invites people into their own and greases the wheel for the message they're sharing and it adds value by them just walking in there. And they add value to people's lives by just walking in the room and being who they are as a demonstration of what's possible for others. So that kind of puts a pin in it.

Speaker 2:

Place of home is always there. We're introducing it, this concept, as a way to really directly go to the core of what's. The solution for today's times is reconnecting to this core place of home and at the same time we're also saying, yeah, the reset is probably the most powerful thing we can do to galvanize that. We don't know of anything else out there and we'll talk about that in a moment. But are there things people can do practice-wise to taste this place, to connect to this place on a regular basis? So I put that out there to you. Maybe, yann, you can take that one to start. What are some things people can do, two or three things they can do to bring this experience more alive in their day-to-day experience.

Speaker 3:

Let's talk first about the fact that people may experience all sorts of stuff, but we also have to look at the nature of what you're experiencing. Remember we talked about like anybody who jogs in the morning he could expect to get that runner's high right. My muscles, they pleasantly soar. I feel great. So this is my reward when I'm getting my dopamine rush. So this is something that I get. It's almost a given. Under a bit more difficult conditions, I get my state of flow being in the zone. It's harder to attain and it's sometimes not there, but we know it does exist. So people reconcile with the fact that most of those things could be of that fleeting nature. And that's the difference, because when we're talking about the coming home, reconnecting with the core self, this is something that belongs to you. It's part of your sovereign empire. You've got your own place by the fireplace right.

Speaker 3:

You can go there and that's yours. That's why the idea comparing that to an epiphany or an aha moment, where I had this catharsis you know like, really came out. So these are all beyond our control. What we are trying to establish here is something the original version of me, that's always there to serve me. That's golden. It's not like I have a picture up my wall with the guru and I go and kiss his feet. I don't know whatever. Right, I don't have to go through any ritual to worship anything. This is just me. So I'm going to my home base and that's me. I'm reconnecting with myself, minus tribulation, trepidation, whatever I experience outside of it, right, all the societal jazz. I just go back, reconnect to myself. This is who I am, this is my home base and it's always there for me.

Speaker 3:

Now, if you look at this from that perspective, well, that's truly golden, because you're given a key to your own place. That's always there. That's your shire, like in the Hobbit series. Right, that's your fireplace, that's yours and it will never be distorted or tainted by anybody else. Right, you won't go there. You discover people camping out saying we're occupying your place. Under the law, we can take over it, right, just like it happens in regular ordinary life. It won't be like that. So this is like both a promise and an assurance that once you reach a certain state and stage, this is yours okay.

Speaker 3:

That's, I think, is very important to understand, because other things that people can do to deepen yes, if you start operating from your home state, you can do anything to deepen it further. You can spend some time self-reflecting. I really want to reconnect with that element of that state a little bit more, and it's always there for you. You want to deepen your experience? You can do that. You want to meditate on that? Yeah. You want to day your experience? You can do that. You want to meditate on that? Yeah, you want to daydream about that state of being at home? You can daydream and deepen it. See, that's the beauty of it, you can find you in a way that state that serves you best, as opposed to other experiences that we have on the spur of the moment. We can't control. You know, just like it's like watching a comedy you may laugh the first time, you may laugh the second time. Well, the third time, the punch lines already right, it'll be difficult to laugh.

Speaker 2:

Your dog may laugh sitting next to you, but you may not laugh the third time. You're pointing to, like a lot of the things we've talked about before, that it also play. I don't think executives really value playing enough and just going out and having fun. They don't have time to have fun, but that is also a way to engage. Obviously, you're not doing you haven't played on the floor or building Legos You're doing something you truly enjoy. That's why we say you should find time to do things you truly enjoy, because that connects you back to that home state. And I think this is the thing that mindfulness and meditation and these practices we tend to flip it right to performance, like if I do that, somehow it's going to make me perform better. Well, yes, it can. And what all these things are inviting people back to is this place that you say we own and that the goal of those things mindfulness, meditation, reflection, play are inviting you to reconnect.

Speaker 2:

But we've had those practices untethered from what we're pointing to, because you own it when you're in your own domicile, when you're in your own sovereignty, when you're on your own throne. That's what you're connecting to with all these practices that we're being told to do, but it's been untethered by the profession in many ways, not talking about this home and this core place that you own. There's no mortgage, although we start thinking we have a mortgage to pay. We think in order for me to deserve to feel that I have to do this or I have to make this much money or I have to make sure I get this job, then I'll be home. No, you're already home. Forget that. When you operate from home, then the natural things that are aligned with what you are here to do and be will come to you because they'll be magnetized to that home place.

Speaker 2:

And I think about this when we do team building with teams. I watch this all the time and I facilitate retreats. You know let's talk about the why. So we talk about the why. Oh, that's interesting how that energizes people. They get really excited, they are really connected to the team and what it's up to. Because we're talking about the why, then we go out and we play. We go to a billiard place, or we go out and throw hatchets, or we go out and play and we have fun and we reconnect and we have a couple of beers together and we have a meal together and by the end of those two or three days people are like boy and happy. Why are they happy? Well, yes, they're reconnecting to each other as human beings, but they're getting a taste of that home again.

Speaker 2:

And then the greater home that we're building together, the city that we're building of these homes and what that's about and where that's going. And then we go back to work and it's plow in. Put your head down. You had that experience. Now Use that energy and exhaust all of it for the greater good of our mission and our goals and we leave it behind. And I think that's a thing to remember that this whole idea of home and sovereignty and that city that we're building together and what we want to do and how we want to express that to our customers, et cetera, comes from this center place of home. Any other thoughts on what we just talked about as far as finding that place, reinforcing that place of home and what we can do about it?

Speaker 4:

I think you said it well, david, both you and Anatoly, and it's a reminder of what we seek is within us already.

Speaker 4:

We recognize this, that longing that we talk about.

Speaker 4:

We wouldn't have that longing if there wasn't a recognition at some deeper level that this place existed, because we've tasted it before, we've had glimpses of it, and that's what we're ultimately getting back to, because we know that that's our most natural, fundamental state, that homecoming that we talk about and a lot of people think, oh well, I can only access that if all the lights align and the conditions are right and the stars are where they need to be, etc.

Speaker 4:

And that's not necessarily the case, and I think that's what Anatoly really emphasized in you as well, david is that it's always accessible to us. It's just whether or not we are consciously aware of how to go back in and tap into that and center ourselves in that homecoming, and I think that's important for us to be consciously aware of that. It's all within you and, as a coach, you know that, david, because that's what you always point your clients back to. They want answers to certain questions and we frame them as coaches in a way that the person introspects and realizes the answers for themselves, because it is all within them.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and you don't have to pay a mortgage. It's there, you already own it. I love that. That understanding is so important to drive home. There's nothing you have to do. You already have it. You deserve it if you will.

Speaker 2:

And also, pointing back to what we started to show up, we experienced this. It's a longing to return home and well, I don't want to get too spiritual it's like the story of the prodigal son in the Bible. Let me take my inheritance and go out away from home and spend it and have fun and try to discover myself and discover my thing. Yet when we go away from home and all of us can, you know, this is a great metaphor for everybody we go away from home and then we start thinking it's out there and then we start chasing it. We start chasing what we already own and it's really about coming back to this place and operating from there. That's always available and when you return, it's there and everything that you benefited from being home. You regain your wealth if you will. You didn't really know you spent an aspect of it. You regain it all again.

Speaker 3:

I just want to make a very important statement here. When we're talking about the state of being at home and all that, at what expense? Why is that that we get to enjoy being at home? It's not like it's oh, we're just kind of like imagine things. I want to pay some attention to the fact that the reason you can enjoy it is because of all the intangible benefits connected to the uptick in your performance.

Speaker 3:

So and that was like a situation I observed with one of the executives who acquired the calmness you know, he got things done, everything was fine. And I asked him like okay, well, it looks like you operate at a much higher level. Now how would you rate the percentage at which you operate? More clarity, more energy, more, whatever right? He said I don't know, it's kind of up, 30%, 40%. I said what would it be worth to you? Even like let's not talk about 30% by any optimistic standards how about we drop it down to 20? 20% accrued against your pay? How much you get done gets translated in a very clear monetary value. And then you feel happier about yourself. You get more done, your direct reports are happy, even your personal assistant. She's happy with you today. So you combine all that. It's real Kwon like Jerry Maguire right.

Speaker 3:

So, the idea is that you get everything. But he said, yeah, but I know it's like I kind of take it for granted. I start thinking about that as just I'm just having a good day. I said, well, put in perspective, I'm having a good day every day and by the end of the week you do a lot, you accomplish a lot and you take it for granted, isn't it beautiful? So don't forget that all that energy that you conserve being in a different state, all that energy goes into supporting you and freeing up that energy to be able to self-reflect and be in that state of home. So it comes at the expense of actually having upgraded yourself on multiple levels. That's the real fuel to be used to maintain that state of home state.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and again, and if there is a and I've noticed this in myself, in fact, recently and I'm loosening my day a little bit because I have a luxury of doing that, because I'm a solopreneur but that there is an energy that comes from the excitement of engaging and doing things that are impactful and fine-tuning that and an enjoyment in that it does feel like when you're coming from this place it's more like play. There's a little aspect of it. You're not thinking about that consciously, but there's a fun engaged in being in your day. At the same time, you have to still monitor, because that can take you to a place, not a burnout, but of going too far, right. But then you have this check and balance in you of that part of you that says, hey, let's smell the roses, and it comes up. I'm going to create more space in my day to smell the roses because I know if I do that I'm going to come back with even more energy and make up for lost time and my productivity after I do that. So there's just again. We have all these tips and tricks out there about take a break twice in the morning and 15 minutes in the morning and take a lunch and in 15 minutes in the day and you'll improve your productivity. Again, good hacks, but this is like you don't have to worry about all that. You just know at a certain point there's a part of me that's spent in a good way. It feels like I've done some good work, but I need to rest and step back and be in myself in some way. That's enjoyable to me, that rejuvenates me and I can step back in and all of this, all the things we've talked about in this ideas we just shared about ways of coming home.

Speaker 2:

I want to touch on the resilient leader method as we kind of move towards the close of the show again and just talk about that. A little bit Like this has been a discovery process for Anatoly and I over the last two and a half years. What is happening here Not that Anatoly didn't have a sense of that before, but we're getting more of a sense of this is what it's bringing people to. So and this is to start with you, anatoly is like something gets relocked in and, as Ryan said, I'm tasting it, but I'm looking forward to locking this in permanently. What happens in the reset process? When we do the resilient, resilience reset sessions? That locks that in so it never goes away, so that becomes your primary place you operate out of. That will still require attention and awareness to appreciate, to deepen, to sustain, not that it is going away, but to just deepen it and grow that what happens in the reset from your understanding, that kind of brings people back to that place in a permanent way.

Speaker 3:

Well, this is a billion dollar question, because if people knew how you would lock yourself in in a certain state where you can expect yourself, wake up and operate from that state on a daily basis, that's really golden. So, technically speaking, it's the interplay between being in the fetus state, right, that we normally experience as we're like in the state of flow. We know what it feels like. We know what it feels like okay. But then imagine that, yes, it comes usually with all the strings attached. I have to engage myself in deep work and I'm rewarded by that state, right. So, but how do we really nail it there? And that's where the shift in consciousness comes in, because the only way you can really lock it in if you elevate your consciousness as a result of being in that theta state and then moving up a notch or a couple of notches, or again, I cannot be talking like as somebody because I don't have the medical background, but I could say like this Imagine this your physical body can only allow you enough leeway to do as much as you can. So it's almost like how much cautious do you want to be? Okay, how much of it can you handle? So, if you've got the right balance of it. And then your body feels like, okay, I'm in the state of resonance right now, I can take it to the stars. And the brain says, hey, I'm done, I'm not ready to go to stars, I want to go up to the same level as that tree outside of my window, right. So I'm just talking about, like the fact is, like it's the interplay, how much of what you could have and how far you can go.

Speaker 3:

But then the idea is that once you go through that shift in your own consciousness, next day you wake up and you're locked in because you have already made that move. It's not like sometimes people experience that. It's certain, like you know, like imagine this it's like having musical chills. You listen to a particular part of opera, right, and it really moves you to tears. America's got talent, somebody's on his own, and you're all like sobbing, yeah.

Speaker 3:

So the idea is like yeah, it's a spike, an emotional spike called the emotional contagion, right, you get moved, but then you fall right back in because it's not backed up by that shift in consciousness. And that's where the true gold resides, because the moment you shift not like shifting gears you go back and forth. No, once you shift, you're not slipping back and that's what keeps people in that state year after year after year. It's because they're locked in. That's why, when we talk about the fact, actually you need to do it only once, technically, because your body allows you to go and lock yourself in at the maximum level you can possibly attain. And once you get there, then you spend a great deal of time living up to that, calibrating your body, calibrating your neural state, and then you finally get there. And it's going to take time, longer, shorter, but ultimately it's all about consciousness.

Speaker 2:

So, in a sense, the metaphor we have that is like an upgrade and operating system that then allows those applications, or that fundamental application of home to operate more consistently. And it's your floor, it's always there and you can access it easily. Now there is an integration process following and that's why we have leadership resilience. Coaching follows and that's the great joy as a coach that I have in working with people post-res example. There may be memories of them or there may be ways that the mind is triggered in certain situations, but that's why I get coaching. So when my clients have.

Speaker 2:

Well, I faced this issue the other day. I think self-confidence was going to be supreme from now on, because that's what I experienced the last two months since the reset. But all of a sudden, the other day, somebody said something to me and I found myself thinking about this time when I was lambasted, when I opened my mouth and at a meeting, and I started commiserating on it. So I said well, let's take a moment, quiet down. So that happened. You remember the memory. Now I want you to go into your body. Can you find the trigger in your body? And every time? Well, it isn't strong there. I said so what do you have to do in those moments is have a way to remind yourself, to remember the reset, to go into your body, because it's right there, and when you do that, that little ghost goes into a puff of smoke right, it just goes away, and so it's important to understand that. That is how you stay connected to the process, not the process itself or Anatoly himself, but with the memory of the reset. That's why we have people make sure they journal the day after their reset, because it's usually the first several days after and coming out of that second session that you have the most clear idea of what just happened. It's like when you wake up and you had a dream and you remember it right then. But if it goes too far along, you might have a hard time remembering the details. It's really important that people connect, because that can connect them right back to it very powerfully, and there is an integration process that happens, as you're pointing to, that the coaching also supports.

Speaker 2:

What's great about the coaching is I'm not trying to get them to fix those things. I'm going to get okay. Now, what? Now, what do you want to do with all this? Now you're living in your domicile, you found your sovereignty. You're on your throne, up in their day. How do you want to bring this into your day, to move forward what you care about and what you want to create, and it is a more creative place, right. So how do you get in touch with that creative place and have some fun? I had one CFO that all of a sudden, fun became her favorite word after the reset. We got to inject some fun in this. We're here every day and let's enjoy ourselves. And let me enjoy myself. Let me give myself permission to take vacation with my girlfriends and go out to for a week down to Florida or to the Bahamas and reconnect, because I know when I come back that's going to help me have the energy to double my efforts. The next week I come back, I'll make up for that lost time. So that is really important to say that. And the integration process is something daunting. It's just something that's part of the deal. And the opportunity is to deepen this and not just take this as an experience, but take this as a way for you.

Speaker 2:

Now that you're home, how do you want to decorate your home? How do you want to decorate your home? How do you want to welcome other people into their homes when you have conversation with them in a subtle way, to invite them in when you're having a conversation and I'm not saying like invite them home literally, but like what do you care about what's happening for you right now? How have you been doing in your career development, you know, or whatever it is. However, they're doing their conversation so that that's injected into what, everything that they're doing, and becomes not something you have to be consciously present to all the time, but so they can lock it in even more and take it to another level. Yeah, it's great. Well, we've gone on a long journey again today. I just want to just come back and see how we wrap this up. Gentlemen, anything. We're completing this series on homecoming anything. Any final comments either of you have as we bring this series to a conclusion?

Speaker 4:

I think it was really important to talk about this concept of the homecoming and what it really means to folks, and you've done a great job in encapsulating that through these past couple podcasts. And I think that this is in a sense, that most people I know that I talk to on a regular basis really understand. When you start to explain it, you start to talk about it, that quiet voice, that longing, that knowing that there's more, that I'm capable of more, that sometimes things really flow nicely and I'm at the top of my game and other times I just feel, you know, lower than whale stuff. From that standpoint, we also recognize that there's a balance, there's an in-between, there's a way that we can get to that home, that sovereignty, that self that we know is much deeper, much wiser and is in best support of our greatest interest and ultimately that comes from a place of serving other people as well.

Speaker 4:

It's not just about Ryan and what Ryan can get out of this, but what can Ryan level up so that he can be a more positive and beneficial influence for the people around him my wife, my kids, the people I work with. So I think that this is something that hopefully resonates with our audience and they can have a deeper level of understanding for, and know that there are solutions out there that will deliver this for them and and and ingrain this in them, that it's not just a fleeting experience, as you described, but a new way of being. Um, and I I hope I'm not sounding too grandiose by saying that, but, uh, I ultimately think that that's really what it takes us to is I'm expecting Ryan 5.0 to be this level and version of myself that is so much more expanded than what I've ever experienced before, and I'm really excited about that.

Speaker 2:

We're going to have a show when it's at the right timing and the right place for Ryan to come in and just talk about, fresh out of going through the Leadership Resilience Reset, what it's like for him. So stay tuned for that. It may be coming sooner than later, but we're going to pace this for Ryan and support him in his process and come back and have a real fresh perspective on this. So thanks for doing that, ryan, and we're looking forward to you going through the process. So thank you and Atul, any final words as we close out this series.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, I'll just touch on the fundamental difference between this concept of homecoming that we're talking about with all the philosophical schools or healing modalities out there, because they're talking about homecoming as a place to heal and revive yourself, whereas we are talking from a different perspective. It's reconnecting with your original core self, and you're going there not to heal and lick your wounds. You're going there to basically just fall back into your natural state. So this is a fundamental difference from any other modality out there, any other philosophical concept, and I'm developing right now, I'm finishing up my philosophical framework for homecoming and we'll be probably talking about it later. And I want to say thanks to Ryan. When you made that observation about your state, it just clicked with me. Now it's time to bring that stuff I've been thinking about, because if you've got it right intuitively and I've got it all just conceptually, so now it'll be great to bring it all together and then officially unveil it in our show.

Speaker 2:

That'd be great. I look forward to that.

Speaker 4:

Yeah, that's exciting.

Speaker 2:

Well, very good. I just want to land this series and kind of put a point in it here. What we've been pointing to isn't some dream state. It's what's possible, as Anatoly and Ryan just shared, when we stop surviving and start living from the center and you own this place. This is there right now. There may be some fog around it. You may say, come on, I can't access that or I have to work hard. No, it's there right now.

Speaker 2:

It depends on how quickly you want to access it and engage it, and we shared some of those things on the show that you can do to kind of activate this. And, of course, there's other things you can do, like the resilient leader method, and we've explored through the series what life and leadership look like when you live from this place. We talked about how this shift shows up in your daily choices, your resilience, your relationships and your results, specifically today, as we got really on the practical and we shared how the resilient leader method can activate this shift quickly, deeply and permanently without a lot of effort. So, if you're ready to stop efforting your way through leadership and start leading from this most powerful, integrated version of yourself, to reconnect with it so that it can be your base of operation. Reach out. You also can go to resilientleadermethodcom and schedule a discovery call there.

Speaker 2:

So let's talk about what's possible and explore if this is something that will work for you. You're not broken, you're just surviving. But the part of you that's whole, wise and powerful it broken. You're just surviving, but the part of you that's whole, wise and powerful, it's still there and maybe it's time to come home. This is David Krakow signing off. Just be bold, be whole, be home. Have a great rest of your day.