E026 Erek Dorman

Passionately Wrong Podcast Episode E026

ASH Interview with Erek Dorman

Key takeaway: History is alive and all around us. Erek sees it and helps bring it alive for anyone who’s interested

Topics covered in this video: 

• Erek’s years at ASH and the years growing up before ASH
• Culture shock on moving back to the US from Europe
• Attitudes toward drinking and marijuana use (change in drinking age)
• Erek’s drawing skills, high school drawings
• His interest in military history, why it’s such a broad field of study
• Military re-enactors - who does it, why they do it, what it involves
• Erek’s promotion through the ranks, and various reenactments
• His current WWI impression at the WWI Memorial in Washington, DC
• Why Erek likes questions, including relatively ignorant ones
• His German heritage and what it means to him
• What he liked about living in Holland and being in Europe
• Erek and snacks - his position on Frites, McDonalds, Poffertjes
• Choosing to be a father, adopting his son
• Why he doesn’t have any regrets 
• Rule #1 for his son: be safe (physically, with emotions, decisions, etc.)
• Erek’s love of the nearness of history when one lives in Europe
• His freelance tours of battlefields, including for a US Senator
• Discussion of how the military looks at battlefield history itself
• His cancer diagnosis and health problems, and how they gave him perspective on life
• His sense of humor helps him deal with life
• Randy’s discussion of military preparation for funeral arrangements
• Why Erek doesn’t complain about what happens in life

Transcript

Erek: 0:00

the no regrets thing, I, I have to believe is true. I, my life is my life. I wouldn't be who I am without the experiences I had. And I can't, I can't dwell on, on stupid mistakes I made, or, or bad ideas.

James: 0:14

Greetings, friends. I'm James.

Randy: 0:16

And I'm Randy. You're listening to The Passionately Wrong podcast where we challenge your assumptions, offer some different perspectives, and hopefully help you make better decisions.

James: 0:27

Hi everybody. Welcome to today's edition of the Passionately Wrong Podcast. Our regular listeners know that Randy and I both went to the American School of the Hague, and we think that provided us with some interesting and unique experiences and perspectives. What we're starting here today with our first guest for this series is interviewing other classmates who went to the American School of the Hague. Of course, that was just, point in their lives and they have lots of other interesting things to talk about. But we're gonna use those similarities to give us a foot in the door to understand, okay, who is this person? And to understand their perspectives in life as well. And our first guest today, I'm happy to say, is Eric Doman, class of 86. Eric, welcome on the show. Thanks very much for agreeing to be our. I won't say Guinea pig test case, and for answering some questions and we'll see where this interview goes. So let me start with this question. What years were you at Ash and why were you and your family in Holland

Erek: 1:33

at that time? I was there from 83 to 86, so most of my high school career, we were there because my father was in the US Army and he was, stationed at the US Embassy as part of the defense office.

James: 1:47

And I think you therefore, being in, a family member in the military like that probably spent time in a bunch of different countries. prior to that point, you wanna give us the whistle stop tour of some of the places you lived

Erek: 2:00

in? I was born in Germany. my dad was in the Army then, then he left the Army for a brief period, about a year and a half joined again. So we went from costal Germany, where I was born to, Pontiac, Michigan, where my dad was from. my mother was German. I was born in Germany. And then, he joined the army again and we went back to Germany, this time to, wilts book in Bavaria, for three years. We did, three years in Vienna at the American Embassy there. we did, 18 months at the Pentagon and then, went to Holland for three and a half years.

James: 2:34

Did you spend much time in Europe after you finished high school? I know you came back to the US for college. Maybe you, fill in a little bit of those blanks.

Erek: 2:44

I, I've been back to Europe a few times since then, just to travel around and, see places that I didn't get to see while I was there. I did get to see a lot while I lived there. my parents were big on making sure that we, traveled, even if it was a, a weekend or a day trip somewhere. we always, spent time on the road looking at things. I've been to Italy and Switzerland and all over Austria, of course, France, England, all low countries. you, I mean, you name it, with the exception of the East Block, because we are still talking pre-comm, when we lived there. So our, Pre, wall coming down. So we, we couldn't travel over there because of my dad's job. But, since then I've been able to travel over there.

James: 3:28

Do you remember what it was like moving back to the US or moving to the US when you attended college? Did that feel weird to you? it, it

Erek: 3:38

did. the culture shock then, I mean, it was bad, but nowhere near as bad. When we first went back, to do 18 months at the Pentagon, that was in the early eighties before we went to Holland. culture shock was just awful. everything from mindsets to, shopping habits to products available to you, a lack of, of fresh butchers and bakers and you name it. and then, when college came around, my culture shock was really. Based more on, things, stupid things like drinking ages. and, and, and the, obviously high age in the United States, where we never even bat an eye in, in Germany about, sending an eight year old with some money to go get a six pack at the local store. it's, that sort of thing.

James: 4:23

yeah, I, for people who maybe didn't go to the American School of the Hague, or live in Holland, let's just say that they have a relatively relaxed attitude towards people of high school age, being able to, enjoy themselves a little bit. And so when you go from high school and Holland to college in the US and all of a sudden you're not supposed to drink for three more years, that's a big shock.

Erek: 4:45

Yeah. And, and, it, it, it's, it's a minor thing, all things considered, but it tells you something about. Excuse me, mental attitudes, here versus there. the attitudes towards, recreational marijuana use, for example, there it's, it's no big deal and people don't think twice about it. But here, for this being the so-called land of the free, we have a lot of restrictions.

Randy: 5:09

I do you guys, so you guys went back the same time I did, which was 8 86, right? Mm-hmm. And that was the year that the drinking age changed. So when I started college for the first two months, we could drink at, at, at 18, I don't know if you guys remember this, at 18, we could drink for the first 2, 2, 3 months, and then it switched, and then no one could drink. So everyone was going through that weird experience, not just us, but the whole United States was, but it was just more impactful. And why you said it's a small thing. It's probably not a small team for us, 18, 19 year olds at the time,'cause, even, even while we could drink under 18 in most of our European countries, now we're actually breaking the law in a way and kind of like, what, what's

Erek: 5:57

going on? Sure. And, and when I came to the US at that point, drinking alcohol wasn't some taboo or, forbidden thing for me. it, it just seemed stupid that I can't just go to the bar and buy a drink. But I mean, alcohol flowed and it flowed like wine. it was everywhere. So we didn't have problem finding it. It was just, it just seemed stupid.

James: 6:20

So I. We overlapped for the years that you were there, Eric, and, you and I actually were friends in, high school. I remember you as being a gifted artist, who had a particular fascination with military themes and I guess the military makes sense. Perhaps given your upbringing. did you, first of all, is that accurate? Do, did you have an interest in military things and were you able to continue your interest in. Drawing, you drew hilarious cartoons and spoofs of our classmates and our teachers. And actually the thing that got me on Facebook ultimately some years ago when after I retired, so it wasn't that long ago, was I came across a trove of drawings that you had made. And I had hoarded over the years, and I just scanned them in and posted'em to Facebook. I'm like, this is so great. look at the things that you were drawing back then. so anyway, tell us how you were able to use those skills as life went on.

Erek: 7:20

I, I wind up being a graphic designer, so I, I use, my drawing skills. they've matured, quite a bit since then. So it was really amusing to see, the, the blast from the past and the, all the drawings I did in high school. I, a few years ago, I had a flood in my basement and it destroyed a box. It had all my notebooks in it, and my notebooks were nothing but. Pictures. I, I mean, there were fewer words in there than there were any kind of drawings. And that's how I remembered, things from classes. I continued that and, and the thing with the military, you'd think it was because my dad was in the army, but, I I, I, my father was never very pro-military like that. he didn't promote it to me, he didn't glorify it. It was just his job. And, and I was aware of it, but, my love of military history really came from my uncle, my, my mom's brother, my German uncle, who was incredibly versed in, in all things European and Soviet, military history. And, that kind of sparked it for me. I, I mean, when I was nine years old, the first real adult hardcover book I got was Sea Battles of the 20th Century. I still have that, that's where that started. and, I, I went on to, Major in history. And, I have, been a, a reenactor for over 20 years, doing everything from Revolutionary War to Civil War, to World War I, world War ii. I even, was an extra in a movie about the Jamestown settlement. history just runs through my blood and it's, it's not, at this point, it's not just the military history, but the fact that the history is the only discipline that requires you to learn a little bit about everything. So I have to know about philosophy, literature, religion, political theory, not just the military, but to understand what all these changes mean and what their impact is. and so I, I just, I love that, and that for that reason, I just, I'm constantly reading about, coinage and, archeological excavations and, I like reading personal letters from soldiers. over the wars that really, show, personal insight into the conflicts. And that's what I like to relate to people. So I've done, I've been a tour guide, I've been a presenter to the public at, national Parks and Museums. and I just, I love it. I think you

James: 9:38

partly answered a question that I've been wondering about, but maybe you could confirm it, which is the purpose of the reenactors going out and doing these sometimes very elaborate, presentations. I, is that for their benefit'cause they just have fun dressing up and, or old costumes or, it sounds like in your case there really is an interest in sharing details of that history in an engaging way to people who might not otherwise, be interested enough to go to, to pay attention to something.

Erek: 10:07

Sure. the, with the reenactors, kinda like the, the actual military, they come from all walks of life, all levels of education, all levels of interest. And you've got those that just wanna do it to play cowboys and Indians and go blow a bunch of black powder. And then others that wanna study the minutiae and the detail of the uniforms, the weaponry, the tactics, the battlefields themselves. And, anytime, anytime I got an opportunity to engage with the public, that was my favorite thing to do. I mean, I had a lot of fun getting on a horse and leading a cavalry charge, at the battle. But, that only gives me so much contact with the people I'm trying to teach. And, and you can't teach without context. what we're showing, at reenactments are tiny little slices of history. and people can't just, study that in a vacuum. That's where I enjoy talking to especially kids. but, anybody that has a little bit of an interest doesn't understand the history that happened in their own backyards.

Randy: 11:04

do you guys have a fund, or a nonprofit thing that helps you with, to create your uniforms and get all the materials? Or are you guys all out of pocket, like the, society for Creative and mechanism? Pretty much you're building everything with your own hands and your own materials.

Erek: 11:19

there are hardcore reenactors who insist on, every editing being hand stitched and, and whatnot. But, there are plenty of, outlets. they're, they're called settlers like they were back then, but, they're basically, retail outlets that sell all the uniforms, all the accoutrements. weapons are readily available, either reproduction or originals. but I mean, it's all out of pocket. It is not cheap. I mean, if you want your kids to stay away from drugs, get'em into reenacting,

Randy: 11:48

I, there's a reenactment of, D-Day, jump in, Germany up in, not Germany, France, Northern France and Normandy. Oh yeah. And that happens every year. And the unit, was stationed at my base in, Vicenza, Italy. I was there for four years. It wasn't my unit, but the one 73rd there does the jump every year. Yeah. And, and when they jump all, there's all these reenactors there in like pristine Jeeps of the time. All the German uniforms and the British and the French uniforms, and they're all there and they all watch us, all watch the guys jump in, and then they get, they celebrate with'em. They take'em out to eat and buy'em beer. You can't even buy your own beer if you're a soldier jumping in there. It's really great.

Erek: 12:32

Yeah, I know. I know there's an American reenactment unit. Here in the states that, portrays a 5 0 6 Parachute infantry regiment for the hundred first Airborne, which, ever since saving private Ryan and Band of Brothers came out, that's all anybody wants to do. And that's the only soldier who ever fought in World War ii. But, these guys require you to be jump qualified to be part of their group. Wow. Yeah. They'll kick you outta C 47 somewhere, and, they do it five times in a day and then you can join their, their group.

Randy: 13:02

Yeah. We had a, we had, one of our last guests was, has 135 jumps. He's 50, he's almost 57, 58, and he's still in, he's gonna be in for a couple more years. He's, he's trying to get 173 jumps so he can be part of the one 73rd club. And, and, And I, I, I, I had 110 jumps, but, that's, that's hard on your knees. I don't, I wouldn't wanna jump again. I don't care what, what, where you gonna throw me out of?

Erek: 13:27

Yeah. I can't blame you. in my case, just for the Civil War, when I started, I started as a buck private, with the third US Infantry. I had a basic SS coat, trousers hat, musket, which was the most expensive thing at the time. And, my leather accoutrements, when I finished, I had been promoted to a brigadier general. I went through every rank. I was in a group that actually, I mean, of course this is all make believe, but the, their promotions were based on merit and you, participation and, and, and all that sort of thing. But, I got to the point where I was brigadier general. I had a horse, I had a dozen uniforms. I had, I don't know how many guns, and their responsibility got to be too much. It wasn't any fun anymore. So I, if I wasn't having fun reason to do it, so I

Randy: 14:14

quit. I, I, I feel all generals feel that way.

Erek: 14:18

at one level, I, I enjoyed being able to write the battle scenarios. So being able to look at a battle, like the Battle of Gettysburg, And then just pick one little aspect of that three day battle that we could portray with the numbers that we had and, and, and, the, the artillery and the cavalry and whatnot. Now that's one of the larger reenactments every year. And we could usually, back then we could count on anywhere from 10 to 20,000 reenactors. Wow. a couple hundred cannon and six or 700 horses and, that's a lot of organization. You're not just doing the reenactment anymore, then it's, part event staff. You have to coordinate, first aid and, and water and, hay deliveries. I just say it gets to be a lot after a while and people don't realize how much happens behind that. we've had tourists come in and say, oh, is that fire real? Put your hand in and find out. I mean, yeah, live out there. We cook out there,

Randy: 15:14

there's, there's the, Eric, I remember. Put your hand in there and find out.

Erek: 15:19

glasses when the British attack, it just, yeah. So

James: 15:22

how do you stay up on, you mentioned, having an interest in and working on four different major wars, revolutionary War, civil War, right. World War I, world War ii. Did that happen in a particular order? Were you doing them all at the same time? How, that must have been an enormous amount of effort. Do you

Randy: 15:39

get promoted? Do you get promoted in different ways to different wars? Like you start from civil War, you could be like a brigadier general into civil war, but then you go back to a buck private in World War ii and,

Erek: 15:50

and yeah. I mean, I, I have, I have different, impressions that I do for the different wars. And, and for civil war, the group I was in portrayed a general staff. So everybody had their roles and we would, we would be, selected to command the union troops at various reenactments. So at these big events like Gettysburg, we all, I mean, we performed the duties that were, that would've fallen under our rank, and we would have the positions that would've been held in those staffs, quartermaster and chief of staff and, provost, Marshall and, and all that sort of thing. we'd be in charge of all of that. and, and we'd get promoted by the general and chief of staff. we would have a ceremony and that would only happen every so often. I mean, so promotions were very slow during civil war. and, the same thing with our, with our reenactment groups now with the other wars. for World War ii, I portray a German mountain troop, and there I just wanted to be a, a private. I didn't want, I, I told the commanding officer that if anybody tried to promote me, I'd shoot'em. I, I didn't wanna have to do it. So I, they load me up with medals instead of promotions. But, the, revolutionary War, I was always a private, or they had the equivalent of a private, I portrayed, a, Ja goon, cavalry and, German infantry, from, the Shenandoah Valley. And then, for my World War I impression I've been doing that, since I got sick. And, I am, I'm limited as far as what I can do physically. I have been, going down to the World War I Memorial here in DC on Sundays, and I wear a German uniform. I, I wear a privates uniform. my great-grandfather served in the German army in World War I, I don't have the ts with his rank, but I have an original set of Ts that have his infantry number on them. So that kind of, lets me honor my, my ancestor, and I just go down there and I answer people's questions about World War I. It gives me something to do, and, people look at me, I lost my left leg below the knee. So I've, I, I have that out there that I'm a, I'm a, I'm a wounded veteran. and, I've had people ask me if I'm a World War I veteran. I have people ask. They come up and thank me for my service all the time. it, it's, it's a little weird and it shows you, how poor, people's general knowledge of history is. because I, I'm wearing an Iron Cross, it's pretty clear I'm not wearing an American uniform. but, people still come up and go, oh, did you serve in Iraq? no.

Randy: 18:25

so it does prove that their history's a little off. I agree. But it does also prove their patriotism and they're willing to, appreciate the Oh, sacrifice of veterans.

Erek: 18:35

Yeah. I, and I don't question that. And, and I'm glad that they're asking questions, because then that's why I'm doing it and be able to explain to people, what, what's

James: 18:43

going on?

Randy: 18:44

That's one of the things we've done here, James and I have done here, done this of the military, what people think, happens behind the scenes in the military. I don't know if I told you this scene, this, James, people just don't know anything about I I was before nine 11, I was driving a Hummer down 95 going to a, some training and I stopped at a rest stop. And there was, some hippies, for lack of a better word, sitting in the grass in the, in, in the median of the, of the rest stop. And this girl gets up. She's so this is a Hummer, huh? I was like, yes, it is. And she's so this is Bulletproof. And we didn't even have Bulletproof Hummers back then. It was a canvas top that was blowing in the wind. It's yeah, this canvas right here is bulletproof. And she's really? Huh? I was like, yeah, it's amazing. I mean, but it was just like, she no clue, no clue about how the world worked. but, I can appreciate them not, not knowing exactly what, what you're doing there. And, and, but I appreciate what you did too. That's cool.

Erek: 19:43

Yeah. just because somebody, is, lacking the facts, it's no reason to, make fun of them. granted, there are that group of people whose mental capacity, is worthy of some ridicule, but, I, I wouldn't Do you know them not knowing their history? Yeah. Yeah.

James: 19:59

I'll just come off of what you, have talked about in terms of your uncle and your grandfather and your mom being German and having been born in Germany. Were there times when you felt you were more European or German than American, or was it clear you were always American, or how did that work as you were growing up and now later in life?

Erek: 20:18

I can't place myself squarely in either camp. I, it seemed like I, I was personally more pro-American while I was in Europe and definitely more pro-European while I'm in in the United States. but, It, both sides have been such a big part of my upbringing and my background, and my who I am, that, I, I can't really say that I'm one or the other, I hold a US passport, but, if I could get a German one, I would,

James: 20:50

you know

Randy: 20:50

what, I'm curious why you didn't go to school on the military base. Did you make it, did you make that choice? Or is it just location or, or what, what was the re

Erek: 20:59

both, the American School of Hague was definitely a better school than the, army School, at, so Barrack, but, it, it wasn't close. It would've been an hour and a half to get to school. so it just wasn't practical for us. And, my dad told the Army that, and the Army paid for us to go to Ash.

Randy: 21:16

I, I traveled an hour and a half to get to school every day.

James: 21:19

I was gonna say you were perspective on supporting the US when you were in Europe and supporting Europe. When you, you're in the US reflects your contrarian nature. Eric, you don't mind poking a stick in people's eye when you think it's appropriate, or at least when I knew you, you didn't mind sticking a pencil in someone's knee when they were bugging you. I still have the mark. It's been moving up my leg, an inch every decade or so. But, it's the way I never forgot you, that the pictures,

Erek: 21:44

I have to note that wasn't really a Melvin act so much as it was just for the hell of it.

James: 21:49

Apparently I was something of a tyrant as bus captain. I had forgotten all about that until I saw the picture. so if you remember, do you feel like you gained any perspectives? I'm gonna ask as a result of going to Ash, but we can expand it more broadly, that you think are, are different from others who didn't have the same experience that Ashers did growing up. If you compare yourself now to colleagues and others that you know,

Erek: 22:13

a a as far as what

James: 22:15

anything at all, how you view the world, whether you're contrarian or not, contrary your appreciation for history, your, approach towards life. Anything that you might've picked up as you, as you went to Ash, does anything stick with you and you say, all right, this is what I got outta do in that experience.

Erek: 22:31

for me, it's really more of a cumulative thing, at this point. I mean, I'm 55 years old, I've seen and done a lot, and, that, that time in Holland always sticks in my mind, not just because of Ash, but, I like living in Holland. I, I learned to speak Dutch. I learned africons after I learned that, which is basically Dutch misspelled. I liked being there because of its location in Europe. we were close to everything, which are in, in, in Europe anyway. I mean, it's not like living here where you can drive for three days and, but just social attitudes. openness to ideas and to foreigners, how everybody speaks. A little shred of English or, whatever your native tongue is, they know a little bit and, and they try, to make, they, they, they make the effort. and I think a lot of that's lacking here in the states. you get so much, not outright xenophobia, hey, this is America, speak English, type of attitude. and I, I still, I'm a little disturbed by that, these people that, never travel more than 20 miles from their home county. that's, closed-mindedness really, disturbs me here in the US and unfortunately we've had an extra dose of that the last few years. but, I, I miss living over there just for that reason. That there is a multitude of cultures within the culture that you're living in. that, that people, try to understand who you are or where you're from, or at least are open to the idea that you're not, one of them. those are the things that, that I, I really miss being able to sit down in an outdoor cafe somewhere and, meet somebody from Morocco or, here that happens, but not the way it does over there.

James: 24:16

snack questions. Eric, I remember you as being someone who was not infrequently eating or drinking something. You seem to have always had a tab can in your hand, and the snack bar guy was your friend. And it's only now that I realize that might have had something to do with your. Diabetes, I guess, or you tell me, what was going on

Erek: 24:37

there? no. The, the soft drink thing really was more of an addiction to, Dutch tab, than anything else. that's all I've got to say about that. I'm sure there are a multitude of people. I still owe a Gilded 25 too, which was the cost of a can and the little soda machine there. but, a snacking and that sort of thing, it can have something to do with diabetes. I have low blood sugars and, I need to eat something to pep it up. but, I, I, I, I like snacks. I'm a big fan of snacks. Poison is Diet Coke, instead of tab, and, snacks. I, I'm a connoisseur of snacks, I have to say at this point. I'm, I'm good on salty snacks, sweet snacks, tips and dip. m and ms. I have, reproduction of the holy grail from, later raises The lost Eric, or from, the last crusade, that's filled with m and ms. which of course is what I would do if I had the holy Grail is sitting on my table. Of course,

Randy: 25:34

would, wouldn't we all?

James: 25:36

So we're gonna ask all Ashleys this question, and it fits with your snack discussion, fruits with or without mayonnaise,

Erek: 25:43

without, unless it's McDonald's fruit or sauce. Mm-hmm. All right. that was a brilliant concoction. I'm sorry we when we left. but other than that, no. I gotta go with ketchup. And,

James: 25:57

peanut butter

Erek: 25:58

sauce. No, that's a hard no. I don't think peanuts should be made in the sauce.

James: 26:06

Yeah, no. There were a few things that, I suppose were not to everyone's taste. I suppose I could also ask about licorice, should it be salty or sweet, but,

Erek: 26:14

I'm just not a big licorice fan either. I like Dutch chocolate. Dutch chocolate was pretty good. puff riches outstanding.

Randy: 26:22

good addition to the, to the diet of everyone.

James: 26:27

Absolutely.

Randy: 26:28

Pancake houses. Oh

James: 26:30

yeah, all of those. Do you remember how you got to school? Did you take public transportation? Did you

Erek: 26:35

walk? I took the bus until I got a moped, and then I took the moped. I.

James: 26:40

Until your tenure on the bus became untenable as a result of an incident with the bus captain. Is that what you're saying?

Erek: 26:46

it might have something to do with that. I mean, it was just getting too violent in there.

James: 26:50

I wonder how many of us were able to take a moped to school. Now that you mentioned it, that was quite the status symbol, wasn't it? You did whatever you could to get yourself a little brommer.

Erek: 26:59

It, it was because, it, it wasn't just, it was a, minimum 50 ccs to ride on the Dutch bicycle trails. And the Dutch bicycle trails are fantastic. It was its own, transportation system. riding in school was no big deal. You weren't riding in traffic. I wonder

Randy: 27:14

if they're all riding scooters to school nowadays on the bicycle trails.

Erek: 27:19

you know that Or electric

James: 27:20

scooters.

Randy: 27:21

That's what I meant. The electric scooters.

James: 27:22

Yeah. Yeah, you do any extracurricular activities? Organized ones like, sports or acting, or do you recall?

Erek: 27:31

Oh, back then, no. I played soccer, for a couple seasons. and I did some theater, but not much. Not as much as you did.

Randy: 27:41

Yeah. We'll find out. He was, it was always a comedy relief, if I remember correctly. yes. On, on and off stage.

James: 27:48

So now Eric, if you are up for it, we might ask you, some questions related to how to make better decisions in general. So this is a passionately wrong type question

Erek: 28:00

if you think of it already on that, but go ahead. No, I mean,

James: 28:05

it's not, it's not hard. It's more just what would be one or two decisions that you've made that you think had, a big impact on your life, and maybe you could describe those for

Erek: 28:15

us. one I can say is, choosing to be a father. I, I can't tell you the full story, but, I wound up adopting my son, and right from birth. And, I, I can't say that there's any other experience, that I've had that's been equal to being somebody's father. He, he lives with his mom now. she joined, she married somebody, who was active duty army, and they, got posted to Fort Leavenworth. I always said it was better to be posted than sent to Fort Leavenworth. so they spent for Kansas, but, I make every effort to see him at least a couple times a year and spend some time with him. But, watching somebody grow and having him at the point now he is just turned 13, where. it, it's an awesome responsibility to be a parent anyway. But when you think about it, when you are in a position to influence somebody's brain, when it is at 100% sponge status, you know that you can feed it anything you want. I mean, that's a lot of responsibility, but being able to converse with him to watch the growth of his, his, knowledge base and his vocabulary and, and just general understanding of people, it, it, it's amazing. I can't say that there's anything else like it. I, and I don't, I don't know if I could have handled this full-time. I've had a few other things going on that kind of prevent that. But, even the little bit that I've had has been, one of the greatest things I've ever done.

James: 29:43

It is an awesome responsibility from the perspective that, you have your intentions, but your kids are also watching you, right? So they're seeing what you do and they are sponge like, they pick up on good behavior, bad behavior. So picking that seriously and recognizing, I mean, one thing I noticed about life in America is that it's very egocentric. People are focused on themselves and on, how do I buy this thing and get that job and get this status fine. you need to make your way in the world, but you actually also are interacting with people all the time, and your kids and your family are a huge part of how you can have an impact. I like your answer. You're not just talking about having an impact on yourself, but the fact that you, you had an impact on your son. If you've ever made a poor decision, which we know is unlikely, Eric, but it could have happened, What are the factors that you think contributed to, the suboptimal decision?

Erek: 30:37

there was that one time when I was drunk and I jumped my horse over a creek. You do not want that.

Randy: 30:43

but that happened a lot in the

Erek: 30:44

Civil War, probably, in the Civil War. Yeah. I mean, know, istic as possible. the thing that changes is when, rebel Yell is the sponsor for your reenactment and they hand you a fifth of whiskey before you take the field. that's just asking you for trouble. the risk whiskey is awful, by the way. yeah. But, poor decisions, I have a hard time looking at things as a poor decision. I mean, granted that I've made those and there are those, but. I'm one of those people that likes to learn from my mistakes I don't have any regrets. I can honestly say that because I can't go back and change it. I did what I did and everything that I did after that, everything that I did before that led up to that decision or, was affected by that decision. And, and, and that's part of the experience. I don't dwell on that kind of thing.

James: 31:36

Alright, so that's a good takeaway all by itself, which is to say, look, regrets are not necessarily productive and, you can learn something from every experience. That's a good lesson that goes back in philosophy a long way in terms of whether the person serves as a good example or a bad example. You can learn something from every circumstance, every situation. what advice would you give a friend or your son for that matter, or anyone facing an important decision how to approach making good decisions?

Erek: 32:08

first I'd say hire a lawyer.

James: 32:11

Nice. Then,

Erek: 32:13

depending on the circumstance, I'd hate to be the one making that, having that influence. the only thing I could do is, is relate something similar that's happened to me and what I did with it. But, you. I've avoided with my son making any rules except for one. There's rule number one, and it's been that rule since he could talk. And that rule is be safe. And it's not just, be safe and don't cut yourself or roam into scissors or, jump naked through trees. It's, be safe, with other people's emotions. be safe with your decisions. be safe about the kind of foods you eat. it, it, it, it's almost the all encompassing rule. I could make a bunch of other rules, but they'd all come back to being safe.

James: 33:00

Interesting. So under that rubric, you could say you're lumping physical health, emotional health, relationships with others, a thoughtful approach to taking decisions in life, focused around making sure that you're there to keep on making decisions. Yeah, that sounds good. Anything else about Ash, or otherwise that we didn't get to that you said, Hey, I want a chance to mention this, there's somebody I need to say something to, or otherwise, it's okay if you don't, but just we wanna always leave an open-ended point for people to be able to say what's on their mind,

Erek: 33:31

Eric. Sure, sure. I mean, I just, right off the top of my head, one of the things I loved about living in Holland was, anywhere in Europe, but, when we were in Holland, the history, I mean, certainly a lot of World War ii, but, going right back to the Romans, the, the reclamation of, of land, that the Dutch achieved, the, the Spanish, war of, names just went right outta my head. the Habsburgs Austria owned, Holland at one point. I met, James Gavin at a, a commemoration of the Battle of Oster Bake, from Operation Market Garden in World War ii. the guy was a five star general Bos back in the jump. I met him when he was, gosh, he was 90 something at the time. the opportunity to do stuff like that, one town over from where I lived, was one of the V two rocket launch sites during World War ii. You could still see where Germans had carved their names into trees, and you could see the railroad tracks and the bunkers, all those leftovers. I mean, you put a spade in the ground anywhere in Europe and you're gonna find. Everything. I mean, you first you'll find something, ring tabs from the 1970s, then you'll find World War ii, then you'll find World War I. Then you'll find something from the Napoleonic Wars. and the fact that, was the same no matter where you went. I just, I loved it.

James: 34:50

Yeah. I can tell history has played an important role in your life, Eric. You have a, a visceral sense of how history, not only happened, but is still present around us today. It's interesting to hear, and I can also see that you would be a lot of fun in these reenactments because, you, you got good knowledge to share and you are having fun, but you're taking it seriously. So it's a, it's a nice combination.

Erek: 35:15

I try very hard to make history relatable because the one thing that always seems to kill history for students is it's so freaking boring. And the guys that teach it are boring. and you, you have to be able to make something real and and visceral for people. that's why I like standing on a battleground with somebody and explaining to them why something happened, because of the way the ground shifts or the way, it drops away and you suddenly, you can't hear canons firing because of something called acoustic shadowing. and people don't understand that they, when they look at a map in a book, it's flat and it doesn't show them where tree lines are, where little creeks are that, where rock beds are. being able to relate that and, and like I said, reading all of these people's personal accounts from diaries or from reports and being able to show them that. this, this is what they were thinking. This is what they were feeling. and a few years ago I had, an opportunity, to give a tour. I started doing this thing where I would, give freelance tours to people around the Mid-Atlantic area for Rev War, civil War, and I'd wear a uniform and they would tell me how much time they had and what they were interested in. And I put a tour together for'em. one day I had a call from the senator, a United States Senator, who wanted to take a tour with his dad. And they, hey, so they had some money. they flowed their, their, G five around to all these different sites and would just meet me there. But, we did a tour of the Civil War, battlefields of Manassas first and second. We did the battlefield of Antietam. We did Gettysburg. Then we also did, Philadelphia for the Rev war, and Valley Forge. And, it was just, it, it was very, very interesting because this guy was on the, appropriations committee and I made a point of relating things to him the way he sees them. Now, you have the same deal with care of veterans healthcare, benefits, pay, weaponry supplies, I mean, all of these things, I mean, the same issues, just the clock changes. That's it. they were still running Blue ribbon commissions to find out who made a mistake and who was responsible and point fingers at each other, whether it was 1865 or 1965. that, that's something, I'm as glad he, he, he didn't really think about or realize, in those terms'cause history was just a dry thing in a book. So I was glad I got to talk to him.

James: 37:46

Randy, that's something I was curious about and I wonder if you saw any of it. of all the institutions, you think the military would have a pretty strong interest in paying attention to history? What happened in this battle or that battle, and what can we learn from it? Is that something that happened only, in officer training school, or did you have a sense of it yourself and see it, or, is the, some of the stuff Eric's describing, did that ever come up for you?

Randy: 38:11

in our professional, development schools, they would talk some somewhat about historical, relatable historical events. but. As a as as it progressed through nine 11 and past most of those, examples ended up being, four or five years ago, Hey, this is the way it was after nine 11 started. So these are lessons learned. It became a lessons learned thing and lessons of a history, lessons learned, but more of a nine 11, g watt global war on terrorism, lessons learned, kind of thing. I, I do believe that, I mean, when I went to the Sergeant Major Academy, we had some history lessons and we had to give, we had to do research and give research projects to each other. and I'm pretty sure that the command schools also do similar things. And then when you get, you go to, postgraduate school, you do research projects and, try to give some new insight on topics and things like that, but, As a whole. I have a history degree too, Eric, that I got after I, flunked outta college and then went in the Army for 12 years. And then I got my first degree, which was a, a BA in American history. and I didn't appreciate history when I was in Holland or Europe. we went to all these memorials. My dad was a big history buff and we used to go to all the memorials in Belgium and, in Normandy and all over Germany and stuff like that. And I didn't, I didn't really appreciate it, nor did I ever intend on going to the military, nor did I have any interest in the military until one day I said I'd like to challenge myself and see if I can be in the military, but wasn't really, it wasn't really out of patriotism'cause I'd lived outta outta the United States my whole life. I was a patriot in a way that, I thought America was the greatest country ever. But that was more brainwashing than patriotism, I think. Once I went to war, I went to Panama in, 89, and once I saw that some of my friends get hurt or, or die and things like that, that's when it became more personal to me. And then I got more interested in the history. And plus when I came in the military, everyone thought, some kind of Vietnam was gonna be the next war, I'd be, unless, unless it was World War iii, across the gap and, and Russia coming invading it was gonna be in some, third world country again. And so at that time, all me and all my peers and I were reading Vietnam journals and about, how do, how did they fight in Vietnam and how do we, lose that war, and how do we win it next time? And things like that. So that's what I was reading in the nineties before nine 11.

Erek: 40:48

Yeah. And I, I, I hear that because a lot of, reenactors are either active duty or veterans. a lot of the talk, goes to, their experiences in actual war and, the training they receive that, there are things that, mean, like the, the US Army Training Manual, the basic manual still dates back, to the Revolutionary War. and, the Jackson's, campaign in 1862 still studied, at, at West Point, for, for its, for its tactics. so we keep looking back to history. There are all these examples that are brought up. There's still today, I, I remember watching an interview with, Norman Schwartz Cop after the first Gulf War and hearing him reference, studying German. desert Armor Tactics from World War II in Africa. In Africa, they attacked, Iraq and, went around, Kuwait. that, that was interesting. And, it's probably not a good thing to talk about using your enemy's tactics, but, it worked well.

Randy: 41:46

I know, I remember when we first went into Afghanistan, everyone was, pulling up. The bear went over the mountain, which was the only book that was out there about the Russian invasion of, of Afghanistan. And it was, it was so hard to read. It was so dense and Oh, yeah. but, but now, but that now, 20 years later, you got, you can't, can't walk into a, a bookstore without seeing a bunch of, books about. Or, or personal memoirs about, Afghanistan, Iraq and stuff like that. The only thing we, but that we only had two, one or two books available when we first went in in 2000. In 2002, 2003.

Erek: 42:24

as a history student, Afghanistan is a perfect example of not learning your history and repeating it again over and over again.

James: 42:34

that is one of the things we're trying to help people with our indirect, lessons here on passionately wrong. Eric has how to learn from your mistakes and if not Yours, the mistakes of others. I think this has been an interesting and fun discussion for us. hopefully it's been interesting and fun for you. If any of your old classmates wanna get in touch with you, can we put your email in the show notes or is Facebook the best way for people to see what's going on?

Erek: 43:03

either Facebook or my email eric@ericthebug.com. I mean, I, I, have to mention this, just because it's been the center of my life for the last year and a half. I was diagnosed with, pancreatic cancer in February of last year. And, given six to 12 months to live. let's see. I think I've beaten that, but, apparently they put me on some kind of drug that's, helping me live. but, that kind of threw my life up in a, in a, whirlwind. Had to sell my house, give away my dog, lost my job. I've been living on my sister's couch for a year and a half. so that's, that's the sort of thing that gives you a little more perspective about, decisions you've made. good and bad, and, and what happens when you're faced with a, a sudden abbreviation of your lifespan. And now I, I haven't died yet. but, nobody knows when or how that's gonna happen. So I'm pretty much in everybody else's position, except I still have the cancer. but, I've had to think about it.

James: 44:03

I can only imagine how it changes your perspective, but maybe you give us a little bit of, what it, what do you mean when you say that it changes your perspective? Obviously, you, you, you think things are gonna end, so you took concrete steps, selling your house, selling your stuff, moving in with your sister so you could be close to where you're getting treated. how's your relationship with your sister in the meantime? And, tell me about the perspective that you, you referred to. What is, what do you mean?

Erek: 44:28

I, I've always had a great relationship with my sister, even since we were little kids, probably because of, the life experiences we had from very young ages. she's really been helping take care of me, when I needed it. and I've been, at least, I've been able to get stronger. like I said, I, I'm missing my left leg. I have, I, I deal with a lot of this with a sense of humor. So whenever somebody asks me, which people usually don't, but if somebody asks me how I lost my leg, my first answer is I lost a knife fight with a midget. a little bass just had the high ground and I couldn't help it. Which, it's a lot quicker than explaining how it actually happened. But, I've had that happen. I've lost three and a half toes on my right foot. I've had a kidney transplant, a pancreas transplant, triple bypass. I've had my right knee replaced all of this because I was a diabetic from age five. And, and, diabetes is a death sentence. It'll kill you a little piece at a time, and that's what it was doing. when I had the kidney transplant and then the pancreas transplant, my diabetes was cured. that was in 2017. but the, the, the cancer was an unexpected bonus. and then, after, a few months of, of, dealing with that and the poisons we were throwing at it, my pancreas quit. So I'm back to being a diabetic again since June, which wasn't that big a deal'cause I knew what I was doing. it was just a minor bump in the otherwise. cancer, pre predominated role here. I, I'm just doing what I can to stay alive and having fun with what I've got. that, that kind of perspective, when you read stories and fairytales and, whatever, either fiction or nonfiction books that talk about life and, suddenly facing the end or, what might be the end. I, I take some lessons from some of that stuff and, the no regrets thing, I, I have to believe is true. I, my life is my life. I wouldn't be who I am without the experiences I had. And I can't, I can't dwell on, on stupid mistakes I made, or, or bad ideas. I, I haven't forgotten them and I haven't learned, forgotten the lesson I've learned from them. But, I. you think about all of that kind of stuff and I, I prefer to have a sense of humor about it and just, do what makes me happy for now, which is history, basically.

Randy: 46:42

That's a really good perspective. I mentioned this before we started that, all the military guys in the last 20 years, who, most of'em, probably over 75% of the guys actually deployed to, Afghanistan, Iraq, Syria, one of those places. and they always had to, they were ordered to prepare for the worst by, filling out their will and figuring out who gets their life insurance and things like that. And a lot of'em didn't take it seriously in the beginning. The younger guys, the older guys were like, had family, kids or wife or, something like that. So oh. I gotta really think about what's gonna happen. And it's funny'cause some of the weirdest stuff, a friend of mine died and I was trying to help his wife out and she's, six months later she's trying to get the electric bill in her name. And they're like, do you know? but he, it was in his name, right? Not both of their names. And so they're like, Hey, we can't, do you know his social, so social, fifth grade social studies, teacher's name? And she's no. we have some secret questions. You might answer him. He's yeah, I know my husband really well. Really well. We've been married for, however long. She's what's his favorite outdoor activity? you have these weird questions, right? And she's hunting, fishing. I don't know him at all. I never knew him, and she goes into another thing like that. And so just these crazy scenarios where you couldn't prepare. you, how are you gonna prepare, prepare your loved one for that, because you just didn't think about putting the telephone, the telephone's the worst, you can't change the dang thing unless you got, 18 different pieces of paper. Yeah. And, and then the younger guys, would, would put the strangest things.'cause you had to prepare a, a paper 15 page thing with all your. Your funeral preparations, what music you wanted, what flowers you wanted, who did you want to be there, did you want your, your stepdad there, or your stepbrother there, or and then they would put all this weird stuff, thinking it was funny, or it would be cool to play Metallica at their funeral. And then their family comes, they're like, what is going on? Why is the army so retarded? why are they playing Metallica at my son's funeral? And that's what he wanted, And, and then the commanders, the beginning, I think some of this stuff actually went through and the platoon tried to get together and, get whatever he wanted at the funeral and get the people there and everything. And then later on people started looking at what their people were writing and going, Hey man, go back and do this right. And do something that's reasonable, that's respectful that your family's no, just the way I want it. It was like, no one's gonna do that for you. The army's not gonna pay for you. You're making your platoon. Who went through the, your death if you died, having to, to do this. And so it's, it was traumatic and they had to do it every time they went back. Some of these guys went back 10 times, and every time they had to look at it again and update it and talk to the people and stuff like that. And I imagine that's was really tough for you to make these decisions and decide, to sell your, sell your stuff and where you wanted to move and everything like that. I can't, I can't, Ima I can't imagine it's not the same because as opposed to us where we think we're gonna live forever, and this is a silly piece of paper until it happens, you are like, okay, I gotta, I got so much time to live and I, here's my 18 month calendar. I gotta make a plan of what I need to do, what I want to do. And yeah, I mean, I guess,

Erek: 50:02

yeah, I, I didn't really do much of that. I took care of the big things like my house and my dog, which has been the worst part of all of this. but the one thing I did hold onto, was my military collections and give you a little, idea. I've, wow, that's just a little tiny bit of it. I kept all of that stuff. I had uniforms and metals and equipment and books and documents and, you name it. but I mean, that really was the only thing that's worth anything that I owned. And if I were gonna leave it to somebody like my son, that's the only thing I've got. yeah, so I held onto that. That's all sitting in a storage box in Springfield somewhere. But, through the miracle of, modern drugs, I'm still alive. And, at some point maybe I'll, move into a house again and get another dog and be able to move all my stuff back. But, in the meantime, I'm, just living here watching Hawaii 5.0 and drinking diet Coke.

James: 50:55

people could do worse than adopt your approach to, life, Eric. I think the fact that you keep a sense of humor and you are very funny, it can be biting at times, but nonetheless, I, I don't blame you. it's not a defense mechanism, but it's certainly a way to, to arrange yourself so that you don't feel sad about stuff that you know, it's your choice. Are you're gonna live your life miserable, or are you gonna live your life the best that you can? And everybody has that choice. They face it under less extreme circumstances, but really, we all have the same choice to make every single day. Am I gonna be a miserable grouch? I'm about the bad luck that I face, or am I gonna laugh at the dumb things that happen and move on?

Erek: 51:32

I never saw any use in complaining, and I certainly never saw any need to go out in the field somewhere and shake my fist to the sky yelling, why? it's not like I made a bad decision and happened to me. It just, it's happened to me.

James: 51:45

So I'm gonna say thank you for letting us into your life today for a little bit, and we hope that it remains a long one and you continue to defy the odds. Eric, I really do hope that we can have a follow up with you a year from now, a few years from now, and then every year on the anniversary. but otherwise, we wish you the best and thanks for coming on and being our inaugural ash guest. We really appreciate it.

Erek: 52:09

Yeah, thanks James and Randy. and I appreciate the opportunity and, I look forward to next time.

Randy: 52:14

Yeah, thanks a lot Eric. Appreciate it. We'd love to hear what you think, so please comment on the show with your thoughts. We read all of your comments.

James: 52:21

Thanks for joining us, and thanks for subscribing. See you next time.