Midlife Mastery - with Daniel Wagner

7 Signs You Might be Heading for a Midlife Crisis

• Daniel Wagner • Season 1 • Episode 3

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Are you standing at the crossroads of midlife, wrestling with feelings of unfulfillment, intense nostalgia, career dissatisfaction, or anxiety about aging? These could be tell-tale signs of a looming midlife crisis. We'll explore their manifestations and implications, and remember, these signs are not a surefire confirmation of a crisis. They could merely be markers of normal life transitions, but if they are causing you distress, it's time to seek support.

Let's step into the second half of our journey together where we debunk common myths about midlife. This is where we shatter the misconception that midlife is synonymous with physical and mental decline, loneliness or isolation. Instead, we'll discuss how to embrace midlife as a time of reflection and growth, possibly even the launch of an exciting new venture. We'll look at ways to navigate the 'messy middle' and why midlife could actually be setting the stage for the most rewarding part of your life. Join me and let's reshape the narrative around midlife, painting it as a vibrant, dynamic, and profoundly rewarding stage in our journey.

Daniel Wagner:

Hey, daniel Wagner here from Midlife Mastery, and in today's episode I wanna do my first solo session and I wanna explore the seven signs that you might be heading into a midlife crisis or heading for a midlife crash. Now, what happens to so many people not just men, but mainly men are identifying with the idea of midlife crisis. What happens to so many of us is that we have what I call a shake or a quake, like something happens. Something suddenly makes you aware and you wake up to the fact that life has not quite turned out as you want it to. And things happen, events happen. So a midlife crisis is obviously very complex, it's multifaceted and it varies greatly from person to person, and in a very soon future episode I will share about my own experience of a midlife crisis and all the different aspects of it that I experienced. But there are some common signs and they are often associated with this phase of life which, just to be clear, according to science can hit you as early as mid-thirties to your late fifties and in many can last anywhere from a few months, but most commonly three to ten years. So one of the purposes of starting midlife mastery is to potentially find ways to shorten that period, that messy middle, as I call it once, and help people. But let's go and now start with the seven signs that you might be heading for a midlife crisis.

Daniel Wagner:

Number one feeling unfulfilled. This can manifest as a sense of dissatisfaction with your life achievements, a feeling that life just hasn't turned out as expected, just a nagging sense that something is missing, despite having a seemingly successful life. So this is a real bummer, because from the outside, you look at your life and you're like, hey, I should be happier than I am. I should be, but you're not. So this is the first sign. Second sign intense nostalgia or regret. If you find yourself frequently reminiscing about your youth, fixating on past decisions or regretting paths not taken, this often includes idealizing the past or feeling a sense of loss for the passage of time. So, in simple terms, if you spend a lot more time in the past, either reminiscing, dreaming or regretting, that means you're not present, you're not here. That is a sign that something's about to shake up for you.

Daniel Wagner:

Number three dramatic changes in habits or appearance. Now, this is the classic, this is the stereotype of midlife crisis, where men buy a sports car, grow their hair suddenly, dress really young, color their hair, dye their hair or radically alter one's lifestyle. Massive one is suddenly dieting, going to the gym like crazy in attempt to recapture their youth. Now, if you can relate to that, if you're feeling, oh, I'm just about to look at this sports car right now I remember suddenly going to the gym five days a week until I lifted myself a double hernia. That was like, oh my god, I need to get in shape suddenly, right, and of course, I grew the hair and I did a 50 year old hippie thing as well.

Daniel Wagner:

Step number four, or sign number four relationship challenges. So Often in that phase in life there is a strain in personal relationships, such as feeling disconnected from your partner, family or friends, and that can be a sign you might also be questioning the value and authenticity of these relationships. This is just a massive reassessment of everything that you supposedly have do and are. The fifth sign. That is very common. The fifth sign is career dissatisfaction, so certainly a desire to change careers, feeling stuck in your current job or business or experiencing a real dissolutionment with what was once a fulfilling career. That can be very indicative of a midlife crisis and often there is also part of the sign number one being unfulfilled. There is just a recognition that you might never get to where you thought you're getting to be it in financial terms, be it in career terms, in position terms or building your business terms. There is just a cold sweat. Wake up in the middle of the naturalization that might happen, and if that's, you then know that you're about to experience a major shakeup of your existing identity.

Daniel Wagner:

Number six is increased anxiety about aging. Oh my God. This includes worries about declining health, physical appearance and diminishing time to achieve life goals. I remember this very dramatically. This is the receding hairline, this is the teeth, the tooth problem, the receding gums, the wrinkles, the saggy skin, the age spots on your hands, these likely not being able to sit in a yoga position for a long time. You're suddenly feeling, oh my God, this is what I never believed would happen to me. I remember in your 20s, 30s, 40s. Often you just don't ever think it's going to happen to you, that you excluded from the laws of time, and then one day you have this again, this wake up moment of thinking oh my God, here it is. By the way, by the time I shared those seven signs that you might be heading for midlife crisis, don't worry, I will also share a couple of positives to end, on A couple of five ways you can embrace the potential of midlife, which I think is really an important part of this.

Daniel Wagner:

So, number seven seeking new experiences. Now there can be a very strong desire to break away from routines and try new things. It could be as simple as picking up new hobbies, or as complex as altering one's lifestyle or belief systems. Anything that's very drastic, I would say, is a sign. Of course, many times you know we are looking for new experiences. There's nothing wrong with seeking new experiences. Now it's really important as summary, or in summary, that what I've shared here today doesn't necessarily mean that you're having a midlife crisis. You're heading into one. It could be just part of a very normal life reassessment or life transitions. But if you are experiencing distress or disruption in your life due to these feelings, it's really, really important that you go out and seek help. That you are, if you can speak openly to friends or just kind of. If you want, even we can have a chat. Oh, I'm very happy you reach out to me and I'm happy to chat with you and share with you what my experience was like and I can potentially point you in the right direction to get help before it gets drastic. All right, without any further ado, let me also put a bit of a couple of positive things into this.

Daniel Wagner:

I strongly believe that midlife actually needs a rebrand, and there are a couple of myths about midlife and why I actually believe it could actually prepare you for the best part of your life. I believe and this is my own experience much of what I experienced as a shakeup, as a crisis, as a quake, was actually necessary to prepare me to be open for what's coming next, which is the next phase of my life right now. So myth number one about midlife is it's a time of crisis, and I would say, in reality, it's a time of reflection and growth. Now it might not be pleasant, but it forces you to reflect and ultimately, by choice, you can grow. Myth number two you're too old to start something new. Reality it's the perfect time to explore new ventures. I'm 57 and I'm kicking off my new venture, midlife Mastery. Why is it a perfect time? Because you accumulated life experience and in some descriptions I heard that lived life experience could be called wisdom right. So, the years of experience and wisdom under your belt, you are more equipped than ever to pursue your passions and potentially actually put a turner hobby into a thriving business. I remember many people didn't find a true calling until later in life, and I think that's what's happening to me right now.

Daniel Wagner:

Myth number three midlife marks a decline of physical and mental health. Reality you can be in the prime of your health, mentally and physically, even in your 50s and 60s. I just spoke to a friend of mine who's just come back from walking in Camino. He's 65 and he says I'm in the best shape of my life. And yes, it's true, our bodies change with age, but there's much you can do and most times in our midlife we have a bit more time, a bit more disposable income, hopefully, to focus on the things we want to do, to do the right exercise, to get the supplements, to do the cleanses you wanted to for a long time.

Daniel Wagner:

Myth number four midlife is lonely and isolating. No, no, no, no. Reality. It's an opportunity to foster deeper relationships. I know from my own life for all my life I had no time for friendships. I was so busy building my business, specially friendships with men, relationship with men. I was suffering and I consciously went out to say, I decided to deepen and foster these relationships with men, friends, mentors, my mastermind group, my therapist, my coaches in different areas. So, miss number five, the last miss, your best years are behind you. The realities your best years very well could be ahead of you. And this is sometimes as simple as flicking that switch in your mind that you tell yourself you know what? I don't believe that and I'm creating a future for myself.

Daniel Wagner:

Midlife is not the end of your story. It's an exciting new chapter With your experience and knowledge and often financial stability. And if not create financial stability now you well positioned to make the coming years the most fulfilling. That's actually research done, even a book being published on the you curve of happiness that says that after midlife, through midlife, we're experiencing maybe the most unhappy time of our lives, but once we've been through it, this is potentially the happiest, most fulfilling, most intentional, most purposefully lived years of your life. So couple of tips how you can embrace the potential of midlife. Five little tips here for you.

Daniel Wagner:

Number one reflect and reassess. Take the time to reflect in your life journey so far. Reassess your goals and dreams. Create new dreams and new goals and really be clear what you still want to accomplish, create that bold vision for the rest of your life. Number two prioritize health. I really feel this is something I didn't do enough. Invest in your physical and mental health. This might be picking up in your sport, focusing nutrition, practicing mindfulness, meditation. Get coaching, get a therapist clear some of your childhood trauma right. This is really really important. Number three cultivate relationships. Relationships need cultivation, which means like a garden in nurturing and sometimes they need pruning. So nurture existing relationships that light you up and be open to forming new ones. But also look at maybe reconnecting with old friends or joining new groups and communities. But also let me be open and honest with you also get rid of close end relationships that just don't serve you anymore. You know, after reassessing you might come to the conclusion that certain relationships are just not really helping, and you are free to speak that.

Daniel Wagner:

Number four embracing the potential of midlife is embrace lifelong learning. Whether that's picking up a new hobby or pursuing further education, I love learning. It keeps me excited. I do a lot of research at the moment. Of course, it's about midlife midlife mastery, midlife wisdom, what happens in midlife, the midlife crisis. What I've shared with you today is part of my research. So I embrace lifelong learning and I also know that from science that this is keeping you young and keeping you excited, keeps your mind sharp and keeps your life interesting.

Daniel Wagner:

And step number five, but by no means the least, plan financially, and sure you have a financial plan for the future. If this involves changing your plan for retirement, investing, building a new business or changing financial advisor, do it. I have for too long just relied on my business, thinking my business is going to provide me with a big cashpot, a big balloon payment at the end, and it didn't happen for various reasons. So I'm now 57, having to really, for the first time, plan financially and don't leave it that long. Right, that's my simple advice. All right, that was it for today.

Daniel Wagner:

So today we talked about seven signs that you might be heading in midlife crisis, then five myths about midlife and why it actually is possibly the biggest opportunity for you to live a better second half of your life, and, of course, we also looked at five ways to embrace the potential of midlife. So, in conclusion, it's time that we all shifted our perspective on midlife. This is part of what I want to hear. This is far from being just a period of crisis. It can be a time of unprecedented growth, exploration and fulfillment. By debunking these common myths, we can begin to view midlife not as a time of that we are fearing, but as an exciting opportunity to live our lives with renewed purpose and passion. Here's to rebranding midlife as a vibrant, dynamic and profoundly rewarding stage in our journey. Hope to speak to you soon, dangle Wagner, signing off All the best.