101. Birth Plans, Baby Registries and Postpartum Care with Doula Kristin Revere

Today we explore the crucial yet often overlooked postpartum period with Kristin Revere, an experienced birth and postpartum doula and founder of Gold Coast Doulas. 

Kristin's journey into the world of doula work began after her own challenging birth experiences and the lack of resources available during her pregnancies.

 From a career in political fundraising to advocating for women's health, Kristin shares her inspiring transition and emphasizes the importance of assembling a personalized birth team. Discover the value of postpartum planning and the varied roles that doulas can play in supporting new parents. 

Kristin provides valuable insights into how access to updated information and resources can significantly enhance the birth and postpartum experience.

Learn about the unique approach of postpartum doulas at Gold Coast, who work with families throughout the first year, providing ongoing support beyond initial recovery. 

 Whether you're expecting, thinking about growing your family, or simply love a good conversation about motherhood, this episode offers a wealth of information and inspiration.

Connect with Kristin Revere:

Website: www.goldcoastdoulas.com 

Her Book: Supported: Your Guide to Birth and Baby

Podcast: www.askthedoulas.com 

Instagram: @goldcoastdoulas 

TODAY'S SPONSOR:

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📺 Watch the episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOpw5ui4uxJHx0tLFVtpnfSkpObfc4d-K

You can find Katie at:
website: burntpancakes.com
YouTube: @burnt.pancakes
Instagram: @burntpancakeswithkatie
Email: katie@burntpancakes.com

🚽 Did you know Katie is also a Certified Potty Trainer? 🚽

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Transcript

00:09 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Hello, hello, and welcome back to the burnt pancakes podcast, where we keep it real about all things motherhood, and I remind moms that everyone burns the first pancake. Now, when you think about mom, what comes to mind? Strength, resilience, that fierce kind of love that shows up even when you haven't slept, haven't showered and haven't eaten a hot meals in days. Now, motherhood looks different for everyone, but there's something especially raw and beautiful about those very first few days when you just had a baby and you're in the hospital or at home, sore and emotional, overwhelmed, but totally in love, but also kind of falling apart. I remember those feelings so well, just sitting in bed cradling this brand new human, still trying to figure out how to hold them and breastfeed and function, and just wishing for something that made me feel a little bit like me again. That's where today's sponsor, cozy Earth, comes in. Their bamboo pajamas are what every new mom deserves. They're soft beyond words, stretchy, breathable and button up, which makes them perfect for nursing around the clock. Whether you're still in the hospital or finally home on the couch, covered in burp claws and trying to get a moment's rest, these pajamas feel like a warm hug. They're not just cozy, they're comforting. And when so much of early motherhood is about pouring everything into your baby, this is something that pours a little bit back into you. So whether you're celebrating a mom, remembering one, or you are a brand new mom waking up for the fifth time before sunrise, these pajamas are for you. Use code pancakes to get 40% off your cozy earth order, because comfort that feels like home, that's exactly what moms deserve. 

01:57
Now, speaking of those postpartum days, my guest today is Kristen Revere, an experienced birth and postpartum doula and founder of Gold Coast Doulas, a leading agency in Grand Rapids, michigan. She's a passionate advocate for empowering families, a sought after speaker and a published writer featured in Rapid Growth Media and First Time Parent Magazine. On top of all of that, she just launched a new book Supported your Guide to Birth and Baby. Kristen has helped countless families navigate the chaos of new parenthood and today she's here to share her insights on everything from assembling your dream birth team to why postpartum planning is just as important as birth planning. We're also going to bust some common myths about doulas, childbirth classes and baby registries. So if you're expecting, thinking about growing your family or just love a good momversation, let's jump right in. Kristen, welcome to the podcast. 

03:01 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
Thanks, katie, I am so excited to chat with you today. 

03:05 - Katie Fenske (Host)
I love it. People do not talk about postpartum enough, and I'm sure you're a wealth of knowledge for us, so I cannot wait to pick your brain about everything. Why don't you start just introduce yourself and tell us, like, what inspired you to become a birth and postpartum doula? 

03:21 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
Do you want the long answer or the short abbreviated version of that? Give us a little a little mix. Okay, A mix Did like. Did you always know? 

03:34 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Did you always like? Have you always been into birth, or is something that something triggered you into this? 

03:41 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
That's the thing I and as a postpartum doula, newborn care, specialist, birth doula I wasn't one that necessarily knew that I wanted to be a parent. I didn't love holding babies, like most of the postpartum doulas on my team do. I have always been about supporting women and empowering them, and that is really what motivated me career-wise and volunteering in the community up until I had kids later in life, and then I realized that there aren't enough resources for women and that our health matters and we need to be our own advocate. 

04:24 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Absolutely yeah. So you were a doula before having kids. I was a doula after. 

04:30 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
So yes, so I had kids late in life. I was actually working in political fundraising with my first pregnancy so working on the governor's race, and I tried to assemble my dream team of experts. But my friends had kids so much earlier than I did, so the information they were giving me was outdated, whether it was a prenatal yoga class, a childbirth class, and so with the travel that I did around the state, I needed to have options that worked with my schedule for evenings, and the providers that I wanted were not necessarily the same ones that my friends used. So I hired an obese, switch providers to a nurse midwifery group. I wanted an unmedicated birth without any sort of intervention, and they led me to a Lamaze class, which is funny because my mom took Lamaze with me back in the seventies. And so full circle moment. And I didn't know what doulas were with my first pregnancy, or I would have certainly hired one, but I had what was considered by my midwives the perfect pregnancy up until 36 weeks. Then it wasn't. I started to get signs of preeclampsia. I was put on bed rest soon after that and was induced at 39 weeks. So all of my planning. Having worked in fundraising, I like to plan for every sort of scenario but did not plan for bedrest or an induction, and so that was challenging to navigate because I thought I could have this spontaneous labor, unmedicated birth, skin to skin time, took a breastfeeding class, read all the books like the birth partner, all the documentaries, like business of being born, and it still was not enough. And so I was fortunate to avoid some of the interventions that I was potentially faced with but had a cervical ripener and my membrane sweat, but did not have pitocin, did not have an epidural. 

06:55
But my daughter was not necessarily happy during labor so, unfortunately, like a cesarean kept getting brought up if she didn't respond better with different positions and she was posterior. So I was able to turn her at the help of my husband and the nurse, and all of a sudden, once she turned, I was feeling very pushy and so I avoided a cesarean very narrowly. My midwife had said, as I had was pushing, that she had called for one, and so I was very fortunate. The cord was wrapped around her arm, which was why she was not responding well on the monitors. So I was fortunate to not have the recovery of a surgical birth with having a NICU baby. She had some glucose issues, was small and so had to be in the NICU for four days. So I had her in my postpartum room for maybe 30 minutes and then she moved to the NICU and so, again, I didn't plan for a NICU stay and yeah, and feeding was challenging because she started on an IV and then enhanced formula. 

08:13
I was pumping in my room, pumping in the NICU, and I went home without my daughter and, being a doula many clients that have their babies in the NICU for five weeks, for much longer than me but it gave me that empathy to be able to relate to things not going as planned in multiple ways with my own body and with feeding my baby and the dream that we all have of like rooming in and getting pictures and having visitors. I didn't have any of that and the short time I was in my postpartum room you know I'd get a photographer coming in. There's no baby lactation, would come in and they could answer questions but they couldn't help me with the latch or anything. So, yeah, so that really allowed me to see the struggles personally that women have. And then I had my son. My kids are 21 months apart. 

09:17
I got involved in breastfeeding activism after my daughter was born and met doulas at this rally that I helped create and had politicians that I knew speak at it, and so that really led me to the importance of women, supporting women in an emotional way, in a physical way and with resources, and I loved having that doula support, even with a birth that was quick, intervention free, no complications in pregnancy other than some minor signs of preeclampsia. So it was, you know, a redemption in a way for my first birth and did have a couple minor complications, but the doulas were there with me and the biggest thing was that support in pregnancy and support after I ended up. My son had a tongue tie, so I ended up seeing lactation consultants again. I also had mastitis and so yeah, so while I was pregnant I found a book called sacred pregnancy and they started training instructors across the country and I decided I wanted to teach these classes of women gathering together for eight weeks and connecting, bringing in the partners for the relationship class, and then there was also a childbirth class, portion of that that I taught to couples and I thought that would be my way of helping families no options and it would be a hobby, but then my students being with me for eight weeks, wanted me to be their doula. So I thought you know, as a planner, might as well take the class, go get trained. 

11:08
So I flew to Florida and got trained as a birth doula to start, and I decided I'd take a couple clients here and there that I was really connected with and I wouldn't make it a career necessarily. But my first birth gave me a lot of the fears I had of doing the work as a doula and I still felt this calling inside, like this burning, like this is where I was meant to be, and so I worked for the collective that the doulas I hired ran and then eventually went on my own and started a solo doula practice and then my agency formed in 2015. So we're nearing 10 years, wow, yeah. And so in my focus is not only support and pregnancy, but in that critical first year. So our core focus is overnight newborn care, supporting families so they can get rest, because you know lack of sleep leads to perinatal mood disorders and you know, with your work and body training, all of you know dealing with families and lack of sleep and lack of resources and support. So, yeah, so that is my passion. 

12:31
We back when I started as a doula, you had to travel to different States for trainings, and so I was in Chicago and Illinois for my first training with a different organization and then ended up bringing a trainer to my community when we launched Gold Coast and then we hired the doulas that were trained as postpartum doulas, because there were a few birth doulas that did some postpartum daytime work but we really wanted to introduce overnight care to the area and do more than just three hour household task shifts and really get into newborn care and helping families create systems and feel confident in whether it's baby one or four. We need that support. So, yeah, so it took a long time of educating. I mean, people still, to this day, don't fully understand the role of a birth doula, let alone a postpartum doula that's something that I am just hearing about when I so my oldest is 11. 

13:37 - Katie Fenske (Host)
So you know it's been a while since I had him, but I remember just vaguely hearing about doulas birth doulas but it's not until now that I'm starting to hear oh, there's also postpartum doulas and there's a difference between the two. Like they, they exist. They were not. They did not exist 11 years ago when I had him. Um. So I think that is incredible that we have this support now. 

14:05 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
Absolutely, and I again, I'm so passionate about judgment-free support, and many doulas have specialties. Some only attend home births, some really connect with parents with a goal of an unmedicated birth at Gold Coast. We support families, no matter how they birth their baby, how they choose to parent, as long as it's safe, of course, safe sleep especially and however they choose to feed their baby. Some doulas are very focused on breast is best, for example but we want families to feel safe with us and get the education that they need, whether it's in parenting and feeding their baby or in preparing for their birth, without the judgment that well-meaning friends and family already have. In how you, the choices you make as a parent, whether you go back to work or stay home, for example, there's a lot of opinions out there. 

15:11 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Yeah, and it's so many. And also like there's opinions. But there's also a lot of parents who are doing this by themselves, without family nearby, so having that extra like doula support is amazing. I know a friend of mine is a postpartum doula how it can be a big investment. It can be expensive. How can families get creative about ways to pay for it? 

15:38 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
So many ways. My favorite is registering for services like a postpartum doula, instead of all the baby gear that your child may not even like, that collects dust sometimes until they get crawling, and all of those onesies. So investing in support and in my book supported your guide to birth and baby. I talk about all of those options, whether it's a postpartum doula, a newborn care specialist, investing in meal delivery service with healthy recovery focused meals. A housekeeper, if the stress is having your house in disarray with visitors in and out and not being able to vacuum and do things during that recovery time. Um, if that is your big stressor and you have a lot of family support, for example, and don't necessarily need a doula. Or your baby is a dream sleeper and you don't have the constant waking um that you know with some babies especially. You know my daughter coming out of the NICU. She did not sleep very frequently. There was, and my son was like a dream sleeper. So you just don't know what you're going to get. 

16:59 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Yeah. So if someone wanted, like a to put it on the registry, the logistics of it, is it like a gift card that you would just add to your registry for a dual assist service, or how? How would someone go about doing it? Or just like an IOU, like I will get this for you. That's a great question. 

17:18 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
It could be many different ways. So one is a lot of the more formal baby registries, like, say, baby list, for example. Do you have areas where you can add a service and you can also some doula groups like mine, my agency has gift cards that you can purchase on the website and I have family members or friends from different states call me like someone's uncle bought a gift card for postpartum support. That is so sweet. 

17:51
That was the sweetest thing, and yeah, so there are those type of options. And then there are services like Be Her Village where you can register for doulas and other services for birth and the postpartum phase. So we have a link to Be Her Village. If people want to have funds, go that way or to set up a gift card. And then I even have companies in my area in West Michigan that when you throw that baby shower for employees, they will all pool money together and gift postpartum doula support, which is brilliant Wow. 

18:29 - Katie Fenske (Host)
That's incredible. So you're only in that area, or do you service like other States? 

18:36 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
So for in-person support for postpartum. I serve up and down Lake Michigan, so Southwest Michigan, west Michigan and Northern, so up to like Charlotte LaVoy, petoskey, and for birth it's only focused in that. Grand Rapids, west Michigan area. We want to be close, close to you. 

18:56 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Yes, we want to be close. 

18:57 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
We have a window. We need to get to a birth and yes. And then, since the focus is that overnight support, when I expanded it was only in that service of day and overnight doulas and newborn care, and we have virtual services so people can hire us for sleep consulting and a variety of our classes are online, becoming a mother course, so we're able to have more impact than just in Michigan. 

19:27 - Katie Fenske (Host)
I bet with COVID when all of those hospital classes could not be held. Did that shift how like prenatal classes were done? Cause we used to always just do the in-person hospital class right what I experienced, but now it seems like there must be so many more available options. 

19:46 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
There are. I actually co-created the becoming a mother course during the pandemic because so many things shut down. Of course, our postpartum work slowed during that time, even though we were considered essential workers in Michigan. We worked the whole time in the hospital, other than one week when it was stay at home order, Um, but we families were worried about having a doula in the home. 

20:12
Yeah, we didn't know we put our energy into pivoting from in-person classes. At that time everything was in person, only I had no virtual classes and so we started using zoom, had live hypnobirthing classes. I teach a comfort measure for labor class, which is very hands-on, involves the partner in different positions, different positions, and so I had to reimagine that class and make it virtual for two years and our breastfeeding and newborn survival multiples all the classes that we teach went to live virtual. And then we started transitioning to some self-paced classes with live calls and then created the course, and that course led to the book. A lot of the content that's in there. 

21:07 - Katie Fenske (Host)
It's so interesting to see how life leads to all these things. Like you said, my birth is what caused me to go on to do this. How life just leads. You never know what to expect. What are some? So when I did my birth class, it was like three hours of delivery, one tiny snippet of C-sections, which my first ended up being a C-section. 

21:30
He was a breech baby, um, and then I did do like a very short, like one hour, breastfeeding class. Okay, that's it. That's pretty much all that was offered. What are some other types of preparations that moms can take classes for? 

21:45 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
Yes. So and I find that because of all the online resources, like especially some of our younger clients, they might look at YouTube videos, and so the in-person, I feel is very important. When I took Lamaze both times as a planner, I found that I had a community of moms who were pregnant at the same time and continued those relationships. I still talk to many, especially from my first pregnancy, that first Lamaze class, and we would have meetups with our kids every year and outings to the pumpkin patch, and so there's something about connecting with other people in an in-person class or even a live virtual class. 

22:35
So, and the out of hospital comprehensive childbirth classes like a Lamaze or hypnobirthing Bradley method, or there are certainly many other structured classes that could be based on one philosophy. 

22:53
There's hypnobabies, there's gentle birth, which is very similar to hypnobirthing, so those will get into not only potential interventions like a surgical birth, but some of them, like hypnobirthing, is very mind body focused. 

23:12
So we have students in our class that have a planned surgical birth, that maybe have a fear or some past trauma from medical surgeries and want that relaxation and mindset going into it, or want an epidural but still want to be able to understand positions if they're laboring at home before going in or want to delay the epidural and then clients who have a home birth can take it, or want an unmedicated hospital birth. That type of class is for everyone. Some classes are more for unmedicated birthing, like, say, bradley, or even many Lamaze focuses are on that breathing and positions to try to avoid interventions and progress labor, but all of them are very partner supported and so, whether you take a class at the hospital or a class like hypnobirthing, having your partner attend or a support person like a friend or your mother is helpful to again like do the breathing and then some of the relaxation techniques and labor massage, for example. 

24:33 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Wow, there's just so much more out there than was there when I first delivered. What would you give advice? So my first was a C-section. Um and I it was not according to plan. You know, he just breached baby. It was. The decision was made. No one would deliver him. They were like it's C-section, that's your option. And that was very hard for me because I am also a planner and it was hard to come to terms with, like I'm not going to have the birth that I thought I was going to have. 

25:04
So, how would? What advice do you give to postpartum moms who didn't have the delivery that they were hoping for? 

25:11 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
Certainly processing that birth with them. So if you have a postpartum doula or even birth doulas, have a follow-up visit and going through the birth story, giving resources for healing are needed. But oftentimes when we're pregnant you know we're celebrated, it's about you and your baby to be, but after we deliver it's all about baby. So friends and family are giving gifts for the baby. Many times they want to hold your baby, but the mother also needs support and we've gone through a major life transition and in your case you know your plans didn't go the way you wanted. 

25:58
Same with me. And there's some processing. Whether you have a therapist to talk through or you talk to your partner or friend and say, hey, can you give me a minute and hear? You know what I went through or even anyone else who was in the room with you and see if things are. You know the way that you remember them to be. I'm a big fan of writing out your birth story as a way to not only process but to give it as a gift for your child one day, especially if you have a daughter. 

26:35 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Yes and I. I really I thought I would never forget all every little detail. Looking back now, the other day I was like, what time were you born at? Were you born at 10? Or were you? I'm like, how did I forget that? You do forget little, little moments. 

26:52 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
I feel the same way. Luckily, I wrote down both of my birth stories, but I some of it, you know, fades away and my daughter one day might want to compare how her birth experience went with my birth and, you know, with my son I delivered past my due date and you just never know. 

27:16 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Yeah, and I think what I learned cause my other two I had two more. I had natural birth with them. So for me I have learned. So for anyone who had a C-section, I healed from that I learned that that was his birth story, that's the way he was meant to be born and when it happened it was like why? Why couldn't I have had that birth that I wanted? But I look back and think how special his was compared to the other two that were also totally different and didn't go according to plan. Also, you know, you have to learn to like. Except this was the way he was coming out into the world. 

27:54 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
Because it's not just up to us and how we plan and our own health, which we need to take care of preconception and during pregnancy, but it's also up to our baby and how they're doing and what is best for them, and sometimes babies are breached for a reason. 

28:11 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Yeah, yeah. And I specifically wanted to know why, like, did I do something wrong? Is it me, is it this? And there were like a couple of things that doctors like well, it could have been, this could have been that they were like not too concerned, but it just made me feel better, like knowing I I had to be back and I knew like, okay, I know my body can do it. I'm happy that I experienced this and I experienced that. 

28:34 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
But yeah, yeah, and I'm a VBAC certified doula, big. I'm passionate about supporting families so they have all of their options and have the support that's educated in the unique experience, because there is some not always, but sometimes some trauma associated to that first birth that needs to be resolved Right. 

28:59 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Are you seeing the number of VBACs go up? Yes, cause when I first had him, I had an aunt who works in a hospital and she's like our hospital doesn't even allow them and I'm like what? So like when I, if I have another one, I won't be able to. But luckily my doctor was very like pro VBAC and she's like you're absolutely you're a good candidate to try for one, like, give it a shot. Um, but the more time has gone on, it seems like they are increasing. 

29:25 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
Yeah, and you know some people are V backing at home certain States. You know, depending on the bills and policies in the States, um, like Michigan, you can be back at home with certain. It depends on the pregnancy and so on and conditions. But yes, so certainly more and more VBACs. But the hospital has to be able to support that and if anything were to become emergent you have to have enough staff on the team, especially anesthesia, to be able to support that. So some of my clients who are in more remote areas don't have that as an option because the travel time is too far. 

30:13 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Right, right I I felt comfortable being in a hospital, knowing she made me pretty much sign a paper saying hey, you're choosing to do the VBAC. If anything happens, it's on you. You know, kind of like. I had to sign that paper which made me nervous, but I felt comfortable being in a hospital to do it. Yeah, that makes sense to me Absolutely Um okay, what is one piece of advice that you always share with expecting moms and new moms? 

30:44 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
Well, my favorite piece of advice is that we aren't meant to do this alone. 

30:52
Actually, I have two bits of advice. The first one is you know, women have had support in community and villages over time, and the role of a birth and a postpartum doula has always existed. It just wasn't a profession. It was friends and family members helping with newborn care and nourishment after the baby being there at the birth. And so don't be afraid to ask for help, whether it's personal help from family and friends or your partner, or hiring a professional like a doula. And my second, and what I can't stress enough, is that our instincts are strong, even if it's your first pregnancy and birth as mothers, and to trust your instinct and if something is off about your own health or your baby's health, say something. Women are still dying in childbirth, they are having complications after they get home from the birth, and our infant mortality rates need to be reduced. So if something is off and you're being turned away, we need to take a more empowered role in our own healthcare and advocate for ourselves. 

32:10 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Yeah, I love that, and I think that's where postpartum doulas come in Cause I would feel more comfortable if I had a relationship with someone who was helping me and there to help me instead of just, oh, I don't like, I don't think this is a problem, someone that you're comfortable with, that you can ask and who could advocate for you 100%. 

32:30 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
So, whether it's something like mastitis and the fever and complications with breastfeeding, or if there is um you know, a fever or issues after delivery could be like a retained placenta, for example, and other complications where you need to get readmitted to the hospital and not just be strong and focus on your baby. 

32:56 - Katie Fenske (Host)
It'll go away yeah. 

32:58 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
Yeah, and we need to take care of ourselves so we can take care of our newborn and, potentially, other children. 

33:08 - Katie Fenske (Host)
So what does it look like if you hired a postpartum doula? Like, do they come once a week, every day? Like what, what do they do for you? 

33:17 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
It depends on what your goals are. We find we work with families through the first year at Gold Coast, so we're a bit different. Some doulas, depending on their training organization, focus more on that fourth trimester and that recovery time. The first 30 days to 40 days might be sibling care, like getting the kids snacks and spending time with them, or could be focused more on recovery support, making sure clients have snacks or starting a crock pot of food, refilling water or tea and then certainly supporting all types of feeding. So if there are questions about pumping or you know certain like bottles or pacifiers, we know all the baby gear and can help set up some systems and structure, make sure that the nursery is optimized for sleep, for example, and with overnight newborn care, then the focus is getting the family rest and some families hire us just for a couple nights and then they have the support they need, like, say, their partner's traveling, for example, and they have other kids, maybe a toddler who's waking, and they're dealing with potty, training and things that you have problems you help your clients solve. 

34:47
Or they might also be just dealing with twins or triplets and they need more hands and support. So, yeah, it can vary and some families have a seven nights a week and have a different doula from our teen in during the day and it can look much different. We've had clients hire us just for that. I want to call it friendship in a way, but that companionship that a doula has, because I know with my first my husband had had to go back to work immediately after I delivered and I was used to being a busy working professional and traveling and then all of a sudden I'm alone with this baby who just left the NICU and I couldn't wait for him to get home and then I would want all of that companionship when he got home and he's trying to like decompress. 

35:43 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Yeah. 

35:44 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
And so sometimes we're just lonely. 

35:47 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Yeah, oh, absolutely, that reminds me of my oldest. I, my husband I think, got one week off and you know, oh, wow, a whole week off. No, that was the day he left and went back to work. I was like, what do I do? And we were living. We were living in Los Angeles, so I was, you know, a County, away from all my friends, my family, I didn't know anyone. It was those were long days and I was too afraid to leave the house with a newborn. 

36:12
So I was just literally at home all day and it got lonely. 

36:18 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
It's very lonely and we will accompany our clients to that first pediatrician appointment. If the partner can't make it, we'll go to the grocery store If they're afraid to go out shopping. Yeah, you've got this, you have a blowout, we've got it together, like whatever they see. 

36:35 - Katie Fenske (Host)
So it's like a friend, you can just bring your friend along. So this just reminds me of what becoming a mom back in the day used to be, where you did have a village. Now it feels like we're all kind of separated from each other. That's what the village was like you had a baby, I'm here to help. What can I do? 

36:53 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
100% and it's so needed, so we don't have to be super women and just like suck it up. 

37:00
Yeah, it is okay to ask for help. It's okay to hire help. I see a lot of articles about postpartum doulas where it's like you're a bad mom If you hire experts in your home and it's only for the elite or the wealthy, the celebrities and it's not. And if you budget accordingly and I like to talk about planning for birth and baby the way you would for other life occasions, like a wedding or building a home, for example. And what is your priority? If it's sleep, then you're going to budget for a sleep consultant and baby's old enough for that, or a newborn care specialist or overnight postpartum doula to optimize your rest so you are able to thrive during the day. And if your priority is beautiful pictures and videos and you want a videographer, photographer at your birth and you want all of these maternity photos and newborn shots, then maybe that's your big budget item. But planning and prioritizing early on and really figuring out what your goals are. 

38:18 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Yeah, I had I known how much lack of sleep would affect me with my oldest. 

38:24
I would have for sure hired someone, because I did. By the time I had my third, I took an online class for sleep. I did all the preparations that I didn't know to do with my first Cause. We just, you know, became new parents and they were like what is this? This is so hard, so I'm glad it's out there. What are some things? So I just thought of this, if you want to budget accordingly, what are some things on a traditional registry that you actually don't think we really need, that we could save money on? 

38:57 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
Yeah, I mean initially you babies ideally should be in a bassinet versus the big crib, and so I just think that fancy Pinterest, perfect nursery is not necessary because people will buy these $3,000 cribs and the fanciest stroller and your baby doesn't need all of the things. And you know it is nice to document that and have a cute theme for the nursery. And nesting is a real instinct that we all have. But honestly, like the baby gear, you can go with the basics, but certainly you know making sure there aren't recalls and getting recommendations from friends or baby registry consultants. We do baby registry consultations but you don't necessarily need the Cadillac of all of the baby gear. But find out what is trusted, what is reliable with car seats, what will work for your vehicles, and make sure that you are focused more on safety than on how something looks necessarily. 

40:17 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Right, cause you can go overboard on the registry. There's just absolutely stuff out there. 

40:22 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
Just like wedding. You know registries. You can go overboard on things that you don't really need for your household because it's easy to just put it on a list and check that box or scan it if you're in target or something but really like what are your priorities and what is going to impact your postnatal recovery time the most and what can you maybe buy later and when baby you know when your child is walking or crawling? And some of the I mean even high chairs aren't needed for quite some time, for example. 

41:03 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Right, they just fill up space in your house too. 

41:05 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
Exactly Collect dust, fill up space, and yes, so. And family members want to help, but they think that buying all those cute little onesies'll make the difference. 

41:19 - Katie Fenske (Host)
But they grow out of them very fast? 

41:22 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
Yeah, they do. I had a hard enough time with my first, with all the baby showers like taking pictures, so people knew that my daughter wore all the outfits and that one time before she outgrew it. That was the goal, like one where we really don't need all of that and again, like we survived, you know, over time without a whole lot for our babies. So just getting back to basics and looking at more of the safety ratings and, yeah, the trusted recommendations from professionals or friends the trusted recommendations from professionals or friends Awesome. 

42:05 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Oh well, I absolutely love what you do. I think it's so needed. Times 20. You know we need to keep spreading the word that postpartum care is essential. It's needed. 

42:13 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
Absolutely. 

42:14 - Katie Fenske (Host)
As much as all the prenatal you know appointments we have that should extend postpartum? Yes, absolutely. Can you tell us where we can find your book, your podcast and information about your business? 

42:30 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
Absolutely, katie. So my business, gold Coast doulas, is on social, so we're on Instagram, facebook, pinterest, youtube all of the channels, all the things at Gold Coast doulas and you can also get connected to the podcast through that website, goldcoastdoulascom, and my podcast at the doulas interviews experts like yourself in the birth and baby space, and my book supported your guide to birth and baby that I coauthored with Alyssa Venaclase. We're both postpartum doulas. I'm the birth doula of the team. She's a sleep consultant, which I am not, so her sleep chapter is golden, but we have we recorded the book ourselves, so we have an audio version on Audible that's awesome and have a kindle version. So ebook, if that's how you consume books. We have paperback hardcover and worked with a small press publisher that is focused on feeding and birth and baby related books. So, yeah, so you can find it on Amazon, any online retailer like bookshoporg, or you can find it in select bookstores and libraries. 

43:54 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Love it Well. On behalf of new moms, expectant moms, already birth moms, thank you for everything you do. 

44:03 - Kristin Revere (Guest)
Thank you for the work you're doing and I'm a big fan of your podcast, so I'm so thrilled to share about postpartum support with your audience. 

44:14 - Katie Fenske (Host)
Special thanks to Kristen for all of her insights that she shared. I am the number one supporter of postpartum doulas because I think they are so needed in this world, so if you are looking for information about her, please check out the show notes so that you can listen to her podcast, get her book or follow her on social media. And until next week, I want to remind all of you that everyone burns their first pancake, so just keep flipping.