Zombie Book Club
Welcome to Zombie Book Club! We're a Podcast that's also a book club! We talk about Zombie / Apocalyptic horror novels, TV and movies.
Zombie Book Club
Billionaire Bunkers: How the Disgustingly Rich Plan to Outlive Us All | Zombie Book Club #13
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Ever wondered what the super-rich are doing with their wealth to ensure their survival in a potential dystopian future? Buckle up as we, your hosts Dan and Leah, leave no stone unturned to reveal the fascinating world of billionaire bunkers and luxury apocalypse preparation. We'll explore the irony and hilarity in the ultra-rich gearing up for an apocalypse, possibly of their own making, and fantasize about a crowd of 'zombies' eager to consume their wealth.
As we journey through this episode, we dive into an intense discussion on the best bunker locations and the strategies to infiltrate these luxury hideouts. But it's not all serious; we add a touch of whimsy imagining ourselves as bunker invaders while also considering the moral ramifications of hoarding resources during a crisis. The intriguing initiatives of JC Cole, the former president of the American Chamber of Commerce in Latvia, to restore regional food security, also finds a place in our chat.
But what's a discussion without some laughter? We share a comedic take on the recent Ocean Gate submarine fiasco that saw five billionaires meet a watery end. This mishap, besides being a source of amusement, also prompts us to reflect on the public response, the irony of the situation, and the wider implications of such events on our society. So, join us for this rollercoaster episode, and we promise you an entertaining and thought-provoking time.
Article by Douglas Rushkoff called “The super-rich ‘preppers’ planning to save themselves from the apocalypse” https://www.theguardian.com/news/2022/sep/04/super-rich-prepper-bunkers-apocalypse-survival-richest-rushkoff
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Yeah, welcome to the Zombie Book Club, the only book club where sometimes the book is real life and the survivors are the ultra rich and powerful actively prepping for the end times that they are directly responsible for creating, and where the zombies trying to eat them Yum yum, yum, yum, yum. Hi, i'm Dan, i'm a writer and when I'm not pouring hot tar and rocks on the ground for money, i'm writing a book based on the zombie apocalypse, where billionaires even are not the heroes of my story, go figure.
Speaker 2I thought billionaires were always the hero of every story.
Speaker 1They are the hero. You know, the hero's journey always starts off with the main character having a billion dollars.
Speaker 2Or immediately million.
Speaker 1you know he's Yeah a loan of one million dollars to start their life.
Speaker 2Well, i'm Leah and honestly, I don't need the excuse of a zombie apocalypse to eat the rich. Let's do it now. I would be totally okay with that. Yum, yum, yum, yum yum, and I was thinking about it as, like you know, that would be a really interesting protest mechanism. Like what if we all just what day of the year is it when you have, like national day?
Speaker 1or whatever Cannibalized a billionaire.
Speaker 2Well, we all just like dress up as zombies, join a horde and go eat them.
Speaker 1Yeah, well just tan and live them.
Speaker 2But I'm Dan with this as a solution for.
Speaker 1You know, i think, i think, as vegans, we are allowed to consume the flesh of the living humans As long as it wasn't Okay.
Speaker 2The bonds of billionaires. that's the exception to the rule, yeah.
Speaker 1So today's, today's episode, this week's, this two, this two weeks episode Because we upload on every other Sunday We are talking about these billionaire bunkers that are definitely being built, or have already been built, to keep the billionaires and wealthy and powerful in luxury while we all burn in a hellscape of fire and death and zombies, yeah. So they want to get away from us, while they do nothing to fix the problems that they are almost absolutely directly responsible for.
Speaker 2Gotta love it. Love me a billionaire for dinner.
Speaker 1Yeah, So for today, our personal life update. Leah, we're just going to talk about the submarine.
Speaker 2Yeah, because really is there anything more interesting in our lives? I guess we got two kayaks. That's our version of.
Speaker 1We already talked about those kayaks, but we used them this week, yeah, we used the kayaks.
Speaker 2But yeah, we cannot afford to go down to the bottom of the ocean and see a Titanic, nor, i have to say, would we.
Speaker 1So we just sit on top of a river.
Speaker 2Yeah And float lazily down it.
Speaker 1I mean, it's not that we don't have any life updates, but this is way more interesting Ocean gate. You know, leah, i can. I, instead of sleeping last night, i instead wrote a stand up comedy surrounding the events of Ocean Gate. Wow, i was wondering if you'd like to be my audience, as well as the listeners, right now.
Speaker 2Should I cue some cricket noises?
Speaker 1Yeah, you're going to need some cricket noises. I'm going to download some canned laughter right now from audio jungle. Are you? are you ready for this? Are you ready to experience a stand up routine from somebody who's never done stand up before?
Speaker 2I'm ready. The real question is is everybody else? prepare yourselves, But it's going to be good.
Speaker 1OK, can I get some like applause because I'm let's pretend I'm coming out on stage?
Speaker 2coming into the stage now is Dan with his fast five.
Speaker 1That's. That's what it's called.
Speaker 2I don't know.
Speaker 1Fast five.
Speaker 2Type five, type five. right, that's it. OK, that's me.
Speaker 1Wow, great audience. So happy to be here Now I have.
Speaker 2I love you.
Speaker 1I told you to stay in the car, mom. I have $15 in my pocket and you can all share it if you laugh at my jokes. I don't want to make it sound like I'm bribing you, but I'm bribing you. Hold for applause and laughter. Have you heard about the Ocean Gate submarine fiasco? Five billionaires are dead at the bottom of the ocean and I'd say it's not a bad way to start the week.
Speaker 1The public's response to the billionaire submarine debacle is interesting. Of course, there was fair amounts of shock and sympathy, and I get that, but there was also a lot and I mean a lot of people saying things like so when's the next submarine leaving and how can we get more billionaires on board? It's almost like the wealthy class have done something to earn the vitriol of millions of people Like maybe people who have to take the bus to their 14 hour, 14 hour a day minimum wage job just no longer relate to the people so rich who can spend four times the average middle class annual salary to go look at an underwater junkyard, bam. Personally, i love the whole thing. I think we could turn it into a ride at Mar-a-Lago. Maybe we could put a sign on the door that says Hillary's emails or something.
Speaker 1Anyway, that company is sunk. Talk about a wash. They're not keeping their heads above water. The pressure they're under is crushing them. You know, this is good when I'm laughing at my own jokes. Seriously, though, the whole business model of the company was taking rich assholes down to the wreckage of the Titanic for $250,000.
Speaker 1Now, in case you never heard of it, the Titanic was famously a tragedy of overconfidence in criminally negligent engineering, and somehow the CEO of Ocean Gate didn't see the irony of ignoring every safety protocol and advice of expert submarine designers, and instead he DIY'd his own bullshit and ran it off of an Amazon basics knockoff PlayStation controller. But I'm sure that his face was red when it hit him, and by it I mean the walls of his shitty submarine collapsing under 25,000 pounds of pressure and smashing five ultra-wealthy douchebags flat as pancakes. And shame on you, leah, for laughing at that joke. How dare you, those people who exploited workers and paid no taxes and took advantage of every legal loophole to amass tons of money without breaking a sweat? They died on that submarine and you should be ashamed for laughing at that.
Speaker 1They're people, leah, rich people, sure, but technically people, barely people. Anyway, when you honor their memory, just remember their investments. Make more money in a day than you make in a year of hard work, and they aren't even alive And they're killed for applause and awards. Thank you, you're right. I am a hero, except oversized. Check from Netflix and roll credits.
Speaker 2That was really good Oh goodness.
Speaker 1All right, i have a future in comedy. I was actually running out of breath while doing that, so maybe it's not the job for me.
Speaker 2Well, you know, we could go to the comedy club like an open mic night. See how you do, i'll laugh.
Speaker 1Yeah, all I need is Leah laughing, that's it.
Speaker 2Oh goodness It is. You know, it is a question Are billionaires still people? Barely According to my stand up routine, I mean they could be reptilians. That's what I've been told.
Speaker 1I'm joking, I don't believe I need to say that I feel like we are in the business of discerning people from people who were once people, and maybe we are the most qualified to determine whether or not billionaires are people.
Speaker 2That's it. That's well. that is a bold statement to say that we are the most qualified. Well, i mean, they are biologically human. So we're zombies? Yes, well, but zombies. zombies do have a biological change. Do you think that like something? do you think that there's?
Speaker 1like the billionaires at the bottom of the ocean.
Speaker 2I mean they're humans. They are humans. They will feel pain and suffering, but they're so insulated from reality and the incredible like suffering that they cause every day. So you're practically they're kind of like zombies. Yeah, i don't know, like I don't under I I would love to know, listeners, if you could imagine a world where you're a billionaire and you would not share that like let's remember, like what a billionaire is you would never run out of money.
Speaker 1Ever, It's almost literally impossible to run out of money. Of course, that depends on the lifestyle that you lead, and there's some billionaires that could definitely use all of their money, but that's because they are completely. I don't even know what the word would be. What is the word for requiring a 250 million dollar yacht to compliment your other 500 million dollar yacht? Like? what is the word for that?
Speaker 2I don't know It's like. I think that, like, capitalism is sickness and the people on top, that 1 percent, and I think billionaires have got to be like the 1 percent of the 1 percent. I don't know, like, i'm not good at math folks, but I know there's very few of them. There's still too many. They should all die at the bottom of the ocean to be clear. But, yeah, i got a plan for that. Yeah, well, i'm going to make a ride, leah. You know why I feel gratitude for the folks that died in this Ocean Gate debacle at the bottom of the seas? Because I really actually think that there's something underneath the idea of all dressing up as zombies and just like if you had tens of thousands of people crushing your bunker which we'll talk about more in a minute coming at you, could you really defend yourself. I think we'd win.
Speaker 1If we had a thousand people Leah, mm, hmm And each one of those people had a million dollars, they still wouldn't have as much money as one of the people on that submarine. So, shall we? shall we move on to our main story, Leah?
Speaker 2Yeah, so I think inspired by Ocean Gate, and I'm actually. It was probably around the same time. I feel like we read this article and then the Ocean Gate thing happened or like, or closely back to back.
Speaker 1But it was written a year ago. but it's. it's been popping up Like the search algorithms know what's going on.
Billionaire Preppers and the Zombie Apocalypse
Speaker 2That's true, Yeah, it's true, It was published in September 4th 2022 in the Observer the Guardian And it's called the super rich preppers planning to save themselves from the apocalypse, and preppers are in quotation marks. What do you think that is, Dan?
Speaker 1Oh, i mean I could. I could go down a whole rabbit hole here, and I'm fairly certain that I have autism, so that would be very easy for me to do. Mm, hmm, and however, i'm going to try not to and just give you a simple answer, which is that I feel like preppers are the things that people of our economic standing would do, like we. We would grow food and then like pickle string beans and put them in our basement, whereas billionaires, who call themselves preppers, spend millions of dollars putting reinforced concrete underground and building swimming pools so that they won't get bored when they destroy the world.
Speaker 2I guess that is a slightly different version of I think that's a really good point. So the article is written by Douglas Rushkoff And basically the tagline is this tech billionaires are buying up luxurious bunkers and hiring military security to survive a survival, a societal collapse they helped create. But like everything they do, it has unintended consequences. So basically, rushkoff is a tech expert and is invited to this super secret conference for disgustingly rich preppers and quotation marks to help them plan how to survive the apocalypse with technology, the zombie apocalypse being one possibility that they are considering.
Speaker 1Always a fun one to throw in there. Yeah, i feel like most experts agree that the zombie apocalypse is the least likely thing to ever happen, because it's technically impossible, but everybody loves to plan for it. It's just super fun And that's why we have a podcast.
Speaker 2That's basically true. Yeah, what was your gut reaction when you read the article, dan?
Speaker 1Oh, i don't like. I feel. I feel like something is like in calling these people preppers, something is appropriated from me, yeah. And I don't think there's a word for it yet. I wanted to say cultural appropriation, but I know that that's like not the same thing.
Speaker 1I said no And then Leah said no, even after I explain that we get that rich people and poor people come from different cultures. I have seen the light in the air of my ways And that is not true, but maybe there's like a class appropriation. Yeah, like what would happen if billionaires just like adopted the mullet and like put a bunch of like trans ams in their front yard. But like all of their trans ams are like, perfectly restored because they bought them at the highest possible dollar.
Speaker 2And if it's like I'm a redneck now.
Speaker 2There is a trend, like I was told when I moved to Vermont. somebody said to me, like don't assume that you know who you're talking to. Like there are I don't know if anybody said billionaires. They said, like there are very rich people here who will like have shits, stained pants from their farm and like holes all in their shirts, like you cannot know. And I think there is like a weird trend of like being ultra rich and then trying to be like humble about it. You know, like the commoners getting you stuff from the thrift store.
Speaker 1There's a song by Lonely Island called Humble, and it's a song about how humble they are and who's the humblest. It's like a wrap, like they're bragging in the song about their humbleness And I feel like that's what the rich class of Vermont is like. It's like look how humble and down to earth I am. Also, i own 600 acres.
Speaker 2Well, that's one of my like 10 homes that I own, Yeah this is my summer home.
Speaker 1Yeah, so just to give-, this is one of my summer homes.
Speaker 2To give some context to these folks and like also why it's impossible to spend billions of dollars, i guess, unless you are going to try and finance your way to Mars. Maybe that's one way you could spend billions, yeah, but these That's prepping. The author arrives at this super secret conference and he says quote the next morning, two men in matching Patagonia fleeces. Okay, i want to point out that rich people are still buying Patagonia, which, like for me, is barely affordable. For them is basically not basically is free.
Speaker 2But they came for me to golf cart and conveyed me through rocks and underbrushed to a meeting hall. They left me to drink coffee and prepare and what I figured was serving as my green room, but instead of me being wired with a microphone or taken to a stage, my audience was brought into me. They sat around the table and introduced themselves five super wealthy guys. Yes, all men from the upper echelon of the tech, investing and hedge fund world, and at least two of them were billionaires. So these are the folks that we are going to talk about today, who are actively preparing for some kind of apocalypse, and what you're about to learn is, i think their number one fear is us.
Speaker 1Yeah, yeah, we are, it's everybody else.
Speaker 2We are the zombies.
Speaker 1Yes, we're the zombies they're preparing against. There's another detail of this that we didn't we didn't write down, but I thought it was really interesting which was that um Rushkoff was taken by limo from the airport And the limo ride was like three and a half hours out to this place, like he thought that he was going to like a convention center or something And it was just this place out in the middle of nowhere. This place had a private airport and he saw private planes flying in No doubt the billionaires were speaking of, so they flew on an airplane and he rode in a limo for three and a half hours to get there.
Speaker 2I did not fully process that, and it's like you know. Riding in a limo for three hours sounds very fancy. But then you think about it like they could have actually gotten him. They definitely could have afforded to fly him in on a private plane Not good for the environment, though Wanted to point that out, even a small plane.
Speaker 1If they were like yeah, we, we got a Cessna to bring you out here, it would have saved them time. Yeah.
Speaker 2Well, they don't give a shit about anybody else. Let's be real. They don't care about his time. No, so what's your argument for why this podcast today is still related to the zombie apocalypse?
Speaker 1Well, as we mentioned, they did bring up that they are preparing for the zombie apocalypse, but I think that prepping as a whole and the idea of of an apocalypse they're all related. Like, like, our chosen apocalypse is the zombie one because it's the least depressing of all, the the apocalypse is Mm, hmm, um, actually, i mean, if you think about it, the zombie one is the best possible outcome for our future because if we have global warming or a massive volcano or an asteroid hits, the earth or a solar flare or there's nuclear or there's an economic collapse, we are going to die horrible deaths.
Speaker 1Yeah, um, and we might still do that if we turn into zombies, but at least with zombies like, like they doesn't destroy the planet with it.
Ideal Zombie Apocalypse Bunker Locations
Speaker 2Yeah, And hopefully other species, the better ones than humanity get to live on, you know, and are not infected. But yeah, biological warfare was one threat that they were curious about, which I would argue. Zombies could potentially be biological warfare, depending on who made the virus. Um, so yeah, and then the other thing that they they started asking. So basically they just started like peppering him with questions, this Rushkoff guy, and one of their questions was just basically, like New Zealand or Alaska, like what region would be less affected by a climbing climate crisis, where it'd be the most remote, but have what you need to get away from all the hordes of people that want to take your shit. I'm curious, dan, if you think there's like an ideal zombie apocalypse bunker location for the ultra rich, where would you go if you had a billion dollars, the ultra rich, i mean, if you have unlimited dollars?
Speaker 1I, i don't know. Well, i mean Greenland Interesting There is. There is an ideal place and people have done a lot of research on it, and it's Greenland In other words, that's probably where we should be looking when we're trying to take over.
Speaker 1Sure, you know there's Greenland has its own, its own challenges. But, um, you know, when we're considering all of the threats that could come from a zombie apocalypse, like you know, nuclear reactors could melt down, there could be, there could be a nuclear bombing, there could be radiation, there could, you know, climate change is still going to happen. There could be massive contamination and chemical spills all over the place and explosions and fires And yeah, all of those things. And you know, greenland kind of takes you up and away from a lot of the path of that disaster that could happen. That's really smart.
Speaker 1This is why I married you, dan, when I was looking into things a long time ago, when I was when I was still very poor and considering the possibility of maybe like buying some land somewhere for like 50 grand and then like building a shitty cabin there. Um, my solution, after looking at the location of all the nuclear missile silos, all the army bases, all the major cities and where all the nuclear reactors are, the best possible place was like Northern Maine in America.
Speaker 2We almost moved there. We got to Vermont.
Speaker 1Yeah, and the land was cheap. So you know. but there's a reason why it's cheap. It's super remote, there's nothing around and, like you, better have your shit together if you want to go there, because otherwise you'll just be sleeping under a tarp freezing your ass off. Oh my.
Speaker 2God. But you never know, we may one day make the main dream come true, depending on what our future holds. I think we should get into it like some of the best questions that they ask, because it went from like very sort of innocent questions like where is the bunker? Should a shelter have its own air supply? What's the likelihood of groundwater contamination? I mean, you know that's a real one because of Glenn and the walking dead contaminating well water. It's a real one in zombie apocalypse is to Oh, you mean in season two, when they had to fish the zombie out of the well.
Speaker 2Yeah, the water bloated zombie. How long was just somebody be able to survive with them? outside help Like these were like okay, these are things that I would think about as well. I think your average prepper might think about these things, but then they get a little bit wild. Do you want me to read this quote, dan? Sure, okay, so they're like warming up with rush cough, right? And then he says finally, the CEO of a brokerage house explained that he had nearly completed building his own underground bunker system and asked how do I maintain authority over my security force? after the event, this single question occupied us for the rest of the hour. They knew armed guards would be required to protect their compounds from raiders as well from as angry mobs. One had already, which would be us zombies. One had already secured a Navy SEALs to make their way to his compound. If he gave them the right cue, isn't that fucking wild. But how would he pay the guards once even his crypto was worth?
Speaker 1Even his crypto of all the stable currencies.
Speaker 2What would stop the guards from eventually choosing their own leader? The billionaires considered using special combination locks on the food supply that only they knew. I just want to pause and let that one brief Combination locks in the food supply, only they knew. Or making guards wear disciplinary collars of some kind in return for their survival. Or maybe building robots to serve as guards and workers, which basically means they want slaves, if that technology could be developed in time. So, dan, what's your reaction to this? There's a lot to unpack here.
Speaker 1I'm going to start from the last thing, which is the robot guards. The fact that they're even considering dealing with security forces means they don't already have robot guards and it's not going to happen. That's good news. I guess maybe Boston Dynamics made that robot dog, but what's the likelihood that that robot dog you can turn to it and be like, hey, there's raiders coming, shoot all the raiders. And that robot dog's going to be like yeah, sure, i know how to do that. I'm pretty sure all I can do is walk around and record things.
Billionaires and Navy SEALs
Speaker 2I don't know, but I did just like a quick side note that I think is relevant here. Sonia Renee Taylor if you haven't heard of them, they're incredible, google them. Sonia Renee Taylor was talking about how artificial intelligence and robots and things like that are being made from the imagination of white men like this, and that, basically, is still just like a slavery mentality. They want slaves and they don't want to feel bad about it, but that's what AI and robots are being built for is to be slaves.
Speaker 1Let's give the AI guns.
Speaker 2What is that? What movie is that? with Will Smith, I feel like we'd have one of those. Oh I-Robot.
Speaker 1Yeah, there's also Terminator.
Speaker 2Yeah, you know what? They didn't ask that question. You know I'm not so impressed with these billionaires. Why didn't? if they were considering that, why didn't they ask the question of the obvious one, which is like when is AI robot going to turn on us?
Speaker 1Yeah, How do we control our AI robots?
Speaker 2But I think the most shocking one to me was speaking of shocking literally is the concept of shock collars.
Speaker 1Yeah Well, they didn't specifically say shock collars, but disciplinary collars, And my mind went to like exploding bomb collars, my God.
Speaker 2So they would just obliterate them if they disobeyed.
Speaker 1I mean, what better way to control somebody than being like if I push this button, your head explodes?
Speaker 2Dan, i have a question for you. You are someone with military expertise. You've been there. You've been a great asset for a billionaire to have on. You know you understand technological warfare. If a billionaire came to you and said I want to put you on retainer for some fucking absurd amount of money for you to be available if shit goes bad and I will evacuate you and your family, but you have to agree to wear a shock collar, When do I have to put on the shock collar?
Speaker 1Because I'm already developing a plan in my mind.
Speaker 2I don't know how to like overthrow.
Speaker 1No, to take his money for a really long time, but then just like put a whole bunch of back doors in this system so that when the time comes, I can just take over as bunker and kick his ass out.
Speaker 2Oh my God. This is why billionaires are paranoid, for good reason They should.
Speaker 1This is why we want them at the bottom of the ocean. But I want to back up because you know, yes, i do have a lot, of, a lot of valuable skills, but these billionaires would never, ever see my value because I'm not a Navy SEAL.
Speaker 2Oh, you don't have the status symbol they're looking for. They want to know that they've collected their own special, ultra rare collection of US Navy SEALs.
Speaker 1Well, here's what I here's. My opinion is that these people, they're like. They're like tech investors, like they have. No, they have no military experience almost 100% of the time, and the only thing, the only thing that they know is that there's there are regular soldiers and there are elite soldiers, and the only elite soldiers they've ever heard of are Navy SEALs. And I wonder if, like in the apocalypse, or even watch some movies about them, if they're like I've got six Navy SEALs on retainer, if, like, another billionaire comes along and they're like well, i have a squad of Army Rangers, they're gonna be like are you fucking stupid? Why don't you get some Navy SEALs? They're better. Do Navy SEALs become this status symbol? Can they also be used as currency? Will they be trading their Navy SEALs back and forth?
Speaker 2like trading cards, Enslaved people again. this is the solution to the apocalypse for the ultra Bomb collars, oh my God.
Speaker 1And also, like I know what Navy SEALs can do, do they really think that they can put a collar on one and they are not going to get that collar off in like 10 seconds? You think they could get it off? Navy SEALs, they are first trained to be underwater demolitions experts.
Speaker 2That really doesn't make sense to want to have them for the zombie apocalypse, then Why?
Speaker 1So here's the thing that a lot of people don't realize about Navy SEALs is that, yes, they're elite, yes, they are really tough, yes, they have really good training. But I've always found interesting about the idea of the Navy SEAL is that people join the Navy because they want to become a SEAL, they want to be a ground warfare badass, but the Navy doesn't do ground warfare. So unless you succeed in becoming a Navy SEAL, if you fail, you're just going to go back to being a cook or whatever you signed up to be. But if you join the Army like if you fail, you just go back to being a regular infantry soldier And you still do the job that you wanted to do, which is ride around and be a badass and shoot guns. So I always found that to be kind of interesting.
Speaker 1The other thing is that Navy SEALs is the only elite warfighting unit that you can elect to go to Navy SEAL training immediately after basic training. Where else you either? well, you can become an Army Ranger right after training, got it. But if you want to be special forces, you have to be selected for that. If you want to be Delta Force, you have to be a rank of Staff Sergeant or higher.
Speaker 2And this is something billionaires don't know, unless they hire a military expert to tell them. Would Navy SEALs be best? Just like, yes or no? Do you think they'd be really good in the apocalypse?
Speaker 1Oh, yeah, definitely.
Speaker 2They're definitely tough. You'd be happy to have some Navy SEALs around you, yeah, and to be clear.
Speaker 1I would put them on the same level as a special forces operative, a Marine Force recon soldier. They would all be in the same area. It's just like I find it funny that there is this worship of Navy SEALs.
Speaker 2It is a little weird And also, let's just say the obvious, why do they assume that they have? Is there another? Let me just pose the question Is there another option? as a billionaire from, i'm going to need to make this super secret compound, guard it with Navy SEALs and make sure that the hordes of the regular folks who are also going through this apocalypse are not coming to get me. Is there another thing that you think billionaires might be able to do? Oh, there's a lot of things.
Speaker 1Are we talking about specifically security forces? No, Because here's the other thing about security forces that you can just hire them. There's companies like Blackwater that, just like there are trained professionals that are trained to protect you and you can hire them. But as far as like other options oh yeah, here's a good idea, And Rush Kov talks about this in his article treat them like human beings. Oh wow, Revolutionary Security forces like humans. Like what if you gave, what if you allowed them to bring their families? Not only are they protecting you, but they're protecting their families.
Speaker 1But also like they have their own chain of command. They take orders from the top. So, like you hire your security forces, then also hire an officer to manage those forces, and then the officer works for you. So you only have to worry about the loyalty of the officer.
Speaker 2I mean that's, i mean like that's, I guess a little bit better. but billionaires would have to see their employees as humans first to even have a chance of considering the Navy seal in like regular life, not an apocalyptic life. I also think that like this is what I personally agree with, and I think Rush Kov is human after my own heart. He says, quote I tried to reason with them. I made pro social arguments, for partnership and solidarity is the best approaches to our collective longterm challenges. The way to get your guards to exhibit loyalty in the future was to treat them like friends now. Don't just invest in ammo and electric fences. invest in people and relationships. They rolled their eyes and what must have sounded to them like hippie philosophy, yeah.
Speaker 1I mean, it is the best answer and it is an answer that would work, because if there's one thing, if there's one trope about military personnel, it's that, like, once you have their loyalty and you gain their trust and their friendship, they will do anything for you. Like this is this, is a fact that, like this, is something that. I like This is a symptom of my PTSD. It's that I'm willing to, to, to, to go through any hardship just to help somebody that I care about.
Speaker 2Yeah, you're a sweet pea, though I think it's like a really interesting window into the psychology of these billionaires, because they have this control mentality versus like what if we, like we just had to control everything and protect ourselves, versus thinking like I don't know. Maybe a community based approach to survival, friendships and cooperation building, building resilient communities, i don't know. Maybe like preventing climate change and biological warfare. Now making sure that we have food security. As a people, we could be investing all our money into that, but most of them aren't. One of them is which we'll talk about in a minute, but I think that that's really interesting, and it's the same trope that annoys me about zombie apocalypse genre stuff that you know, dan, which is just this assumption that things are going to go to shit and everybody's only going to care for themselves. I think that's clearly the truth for most billionaires, because how else did they get become billionaires? Right, but for everybody else, i don't believe it And I really think like, yeah, maybe just having human connection would go a long way.
Speaker 1Yeah, i agree, i think I mean if, if, even if you look at the examples of like zombie apocalypse, survival and things like that, the people who segregate themselves and try to be the lone wolf don't make it. You don't make it through the apocalypse by being the smartest, brightest and so lowest lone wolf there ever was. Yeah, you get through it by, like, like, sticking together with your friends, like this is. We learned this from anime the power of friendship.
Speaker 2Not Ruto, yeah.
Speaker 1That's one of my favorite anime. Memes is like is like the super buff guy and it's like trains for 500 years for this fight. And then it's like some some dude that just looks like a total dork and it's like uses the power of friendship and flashbacks.
Speaker 2The power of the flashback. I really actually I would very much enjoy. First of all, i'd enjoy a movie watching the billionaires get crushed at the bottom of the ocean, but I would also Netflix, please and thank you, make that. But I would also enjoy a movie of like one of these billionaire bunker people and then there being a takeover, like I would find that very satisfying, because any time you have that kind of hierarchy and somebody has chosen to put a fucking shock collar on you or they have the key to the food or the combination to the food and there's this like really giant power differential, there will be power struggles. Like people are not going to put up with that shit because we are not inherently hierarchical. People like we I mean our culture is hierarchical, but human beings are not we're pretty egalitarian, we want to share things equally and we have a strong sense of fairness and at some point somebody's going to get pissed off.
Speaker 1Yeah, you know the idea that you're going to fill your bunker full of Navy SEALs. You know people that are trained to to coax information out of people through various means and tactics, and then you're going to withhold the food from them. Like you're just asking for six Navy SEALs to just torture you for like 10 days straight until you give up that code.
Speaker 2Oh God, that makes such a great movie Yeah.
Speaker 1You're going to give up the code.
Planning to Take Over Billionaires' Bunkers
Speaker 2It's just wild and like it just. I really think we need we do need to eat the rich. We need to get rid of billionaires, maybe more humanely be more humanely than the ways we are discussing. If anybody is listening to this, that actually has any power. In this way, we're being we're not being serious, wink, wink. But the author says this really good point that I want to make. He says they're extreme wealth and privilege served only to make them obsessed with insulating themselves from the very real and present danger of zombies. I'm inserting that word climate change, rising sea levels, mass migrations, global pandemics, nativist panic and resource depletion. For them, the future technology is only about one thing escape from the rest of us, escape from the rest of us. And now they've reduced technological progress to a video game that one of them wins by finding the escape hatch. Yeah, so brilliantly said Rushkoff. Thank you.
Speaker 1He calls it the survival of the richest.
Speaker 2Yeah, it's really true. But I would like to fantasize now actually, dan, maybe after a short bio break from all the the coke I've been drinking, but when I get back I would love to hear how would you go about eating the rich and taking over those bunkers and zombie apocalypse, because there might be some within a few hours of us, we're realizing, or maybe even 10 minutes away.
Speaker 1Yeah, maybe in our backyard.
Speaker 2Yeah, I wish. Well, do I wish? That's an interesting question. Anyways, I'll be right back Dan.
Speaker 1This episode is brought to you by delicious, delicious billionaires. Try billionaires coated in our baby back rib sauce, roasted over an open flame. The open flame, of course, is filled by bits of garbage, because it's the apocalypse, but it doesn't make it any less delicious. Try some billionaire fingers It's their fingers but fried chicken, fried with some Oh my God, my phone's ringing. Who is this? Never mind that, eat billionaires, they're delicious. Try them, yum yum yum. Try them with with our patented glaze and original crispy blend. Billionaires, they're delicious.
Speaker 2Get some panko crumbs. I'm curious how much is one billionaire rib go for? What do you get if you eat one billionaires rib?
Speaker 1You get a big smile on your face and a satisfying feeling in your belly.
Speaker 2It makes me feel actually kind of nauseous when I really think about eating a human being. but I will take and redistribute all their money, that's for sure. But seriously, i think that this is something that, if these fuckers are literally enjoying the end of the world and planning for it and making this even more likely for us every single day that we are going to have some kind of catastrophic event, let's talk about how we're going to overcome and win and take over their bunkers. Do you have a plan, dan?
Speaker 1You know, it just so happens I do. It just so happens that instead of sleeping, You're not sleeping a lot. I may have. I do all of my best writing when I'm supposed to be sleeping, but usually the writing is not on my book but rather on plans to take over billionaires doomsday bunkers.
Speaker 2Wow, this is how you know. I've been sleeping better because I had no idea.
Speaker 1Yeah Well, so All right. So the first thing, the hardest part, is locating the bunker. Like you need to know where these things are. If you like, if you just, if you just walk off trying to look for one, you're not going to find one. Typically, these these bunkers are either made from scratch or they're utilizing old Atlas missile silos or built into the sides of mountains. But there's a few ways that us people in the zombie apocalypse, who have unrestricted access to the waste of the former world before us, could, could, we could use those things to maybe find out where some of these places are. If we don't just dangle, we could utilize public records and do independent research to find potential locations. Like we could go and like find like utility accounts that are like for vivos or various other companies that are making these these things. We could find a rental agreements between people who have excavation businesses and people who are selling large concrete bunkers.
Speaker 2But wouldn't all those things not be like on paper record? You'd have to have the Internet.
Speaker 1Well you know, yeah, I mean there's usually stored on local servers, if they are stored somewhere, but powered up with a generator.
Speaker 1But if it's, if it is a government record, there will be a paper backup. Got it? That's wild. Also, we could use technology such as satellite imagery to scout remote locations. That's something I have a little bit of a little bit of experience in. That's a tiny bit, you know. I know I could. I could identify a few places that you could access this type of imagery and it would probably still be fully functional. There probably still be soldiers using it, wow.
Speaker 2Yeah, and you could probably pretty easily convince those soldiers to get on with this plan.
Speaker 1Oh, yeah, i'd. I'd be like guys, you want to go to a swimming pool? It's underground. There's also a bowling alley. Who wants to get drunk? A personal chef? Yeah, we could all live there and party.
Speaker 2I'd your eponically grown artificial light grown fresh produce. Can you imagine fresh produce after living off canned shit?
Speaker 1After after eating parsnips for 10 weeks straight, oh my gosh. So this brings me once you've located a bunker. This brings me to like how? how would you actually get in, because these things are meant to withstand like nuclear explosions. And attempts to get in, they're they're fortified, the doors are like a foot and a half thick and they have these. It's basically a bank fall. Wow. So my first, my first attempt and this is this will require a little bit of skills. So if you don't have these skills, skip this part, skip it, or you don't give it a try. You got time. You got all the time.
Speaker 2True, so I'm having chased by zombies. If the zombies are forted, you got some time, yeah.
Speaker 1So digital access and hacking. So I identified a number of ways that these bunkers would use biometrics and RFID tools in order to gain access to the bunker. So a lot of this would only be helpful if you were able to get somebody that you either know what they look like and can get copies of their image, or the fingerprints or scan their digital cards.
Speaker 1But I got to imagine these Navy SEALs that they've hired. They probably send them on scouting runs for like I don't know, like vintage wine and cigars. So in the event that there is like a regular patrol going out to find goods or to deal with outside threats, you could set up an RFID capture point along their route Using certain technologies that you would be able to find in a fairly big corporate IT office. Rfid technology uses RF transmitters to speak to a chip on a card, to identify that card and allow access based on that chip. You can read these from anywhere from one to 10 meters away, depending on the power of the card. But if you set up a few locations that are going to capture all RFID data that comes through the area, you could then make clones of those copies and make your own access cards and just walk in.
Speaker 2This is okay. I'm really loving this plan, but I'm realizing this is not for your average. Yeah, this is if you have this. I would not be able to do this, i would not be able to follow this plan without you, gosh, you're useful.
Speaker 1There's also things like keypads which, if you were able to connect to the keypad with a computer system, it's possible that you could take a copy of the hash data and do a brute force attempt on the key code. If they're using biometric scanners, like a face scanner specifically, if you have a high enough resolution image of whoever the billionaire is, who owns that bunker, you could hold up a photograph in front of the camera. The camera might think that the billionaire is looking into the camera.
Speaker 2So, for once, all the biometric data that they're capturing and using to know who we are in different places would actually be useful for us.
Speaker 1Yeah, we could use all of that against them. That'd be great. If it's somebody like as famous as Elon Musk, we could 3D print a life scale replica of his face And the biometrics would never know the difference. Also, if it's a fingerprint scanner, sometimes those can just be defeated by breathing on them, letting the condensation rest on the fingerprints that are already there from the last person who accessed it. Since then they've kind of become a little bit more advanced and that's a little bit harder to do. But if their fingerprints are on file, you could make a copy of their fingerprints, just like in Mission Impossible, put them on your own finger and scan it as if your fingerprints were theirs.
Speaker 2Wow, okay, well, i'm loving this, but I want to give some ideas of what I would do as a regular person, that any of these skills or knowledge. Okay, i would bake an apple pie. I would have a little picnic plank in a bottle of wine, in a basket with some I don't know like handmade vegan cheese in it, and I would just walk up and say, hi, i'm your neighbor.
Speaker 1It could work.
Speaker 2Welcome to the neighborhood.
Speaker 1I have some other ideas.
Speaker 2Okay.
Speaker 1So I'm going to skip to physically penetrating the bunker. Let's say that either you don't know how to do everything that I just talked about, or none of those things work, or you just want to fuck it up. That would be true. You could use tools like oxyacetylene torches or plasma cutters to try to cut through the door. It could take a while, but these things aren't magic. They're big steel reinforced doors and eventually you're going to get through if you have enough time. Another idea I had was using heavy machinery like an excavator to tear the door off of the tinge Oh my God, that makes such a beautiful visual Or using a combination of cutting in certain areas to weaken it and then using heavy machinery to do the rest.
Speaker 2So I would not be recommending anybody do this, but it sounds like a lot of the things that you're suggesting could be used now. Yeah, i'm not recommending anyone do that. For what it's worth, Yes, okay.
Speaker 1I wouldn't advise using things like explosives, because that's exactly what is designed to repel. But if, say, you had access to an Abrams tank and a depleted uranium shell, you could blow the door right off of its hinges and probably everything behind it as well. Just keep in mind that that might also cause a fire and other explosions and cave it in.
Speaker 2What about just walking up and flashing your tits?
Speaker 1That's a possibility. It depends on how long it's been. If it's been a few years in that bunker, it's more likely to work. If it's day one, it might not work so well.
Speaker 2I have a feeling billionaires have a solution for that, because the way that these people are thinking, i'm sure they're going to have a concubine of sex workers also on retainer. Who knows what these people would do. Also, i realize that I feel like I have to edit myself. I'm not editing, but I will say I would not personally flash my titties, but I think that in a scenario I have respect for every single person with breasts that uses them in this fucked up system of misogyny for what they need to survive. I'm not against the tit flashing if that's what you need to do to get in.
Speaker 1Yeah, use what you got. Yeah, also, if you have access to an excavator, you could dig up the bunker.
Speaker 2That's a hard ship from titty flashing.
Speaker 1I wasn't done, you could dig down to lower areas of the bunker and then penetrate the reinforced concrete instead of the steel door.
Speaker 2I really love every time you say the word penetrate. Yeah, penetrate.
Speaker 1Yeah. This brings me to my final point, which is dealing with security personnel. They've got those Navy SEALs inside. They're like I don't know why he hired us. Sounds like he needs a personal security force to hire from a company like Blackwater, but he hired us. Navy SEALs have expert in demolitions and underwater mind diffusing, but he hired us anyways.
Survival Strategies and Alternative Visions
Speaker 1So, anyways, you don't want to fight these guys, especially if you're going into their bunker. I don't care how well armed you think you are or how many people you have, it's just not going to end well. The best thing to do is to communicate. You make it clear that you're coming in peace and try to appeal to their humanity. Offer them and their loved ones a place in your community. Surround them and wait for them to come to you, instead of going in after them and offer an opportunity to speak one-on-one to them and explain you're not here to hurt them. You just want what's inside and you have a family. They have a family. We're all just trying to survive this crazy thing, and maybe the authoritarian billionaire inside has been pissing them off just long enough that they're like yeah, sure, come on in.
Speaker 2I like this one the best because I think it's the most realistic. For those of us who are not technological warfare experts. I don't again. I think finding the bunker would be hard. If you found one, and you're aware that it is, I think what I would do as an average human being is I would just watch them from a really, really far away place with some binoculars to see what their patterns are if they have any, which maybe they don't because they're smarter than me, But I'd at least figure out places they're typically going and then I'd find a way to start leaving them messages with an apple pie or whatever. I would just start communicating that way and see how they respond.
Speaker 1The billionaire might be harder to convince with something simple like an apple pie, because they own seven apple pie factories Inside of their bunker. But the security forces that know what it's like to be away from home for long periods of time. they might have family members that they weren't allowed to save and bring with them. The message of a home cooked apple pie as a piece offering might resonate with them in a very genuine way.
Speaker 2Yeah, it'd be fire baked over hot coals in a cast iron apple pie.
Speaker 1Oh, my God That sounds so good.
Speaker 2I mean, how else would you make apple pie? But I think apple pie is a thing that you could make in a zombie apocalypse. Just in my defense of people are like how would you bother to do that? I really think it's actually quite. Do We have a food truck? We have a food truck in the zombie apocalypse? Yeah, we'd get one. I've never considered a food truck, but that's actually really smart.
Speaker 2Mobile kitchen Yeah, I mean, i was like you need that. You just need to know where there's some apple orchards and get like you know the basics. You need some fat and some flour and some spices. All things are shelf stable So you could easily make an apple pie over a fire. I actually really want to try this now. I'm going to Google it later We could use a Dutch oven. Yeah, Oh God, that'd be so good.
Speaker 2Dutch oven apple pie If I make this apple pie over a fire, which I feel like is going to be my summer mission. I will send pictures on Instagram, so Oh yeah, that's the plan.
Speaker 1So everybody knows now what to do when the apocalypse goes down. Find one of these. I'm not, This is not a call to action, Just you know. If you feel like it now you know, now you know how, Feel free to add your own, your own twist to these ideas. We're all ears.
Speaker 2Yeah, we should definitely put a poll out there to see how other people would find their way into a billionaire's bunker. But there are alternate visions And I was really grateful that Rushkoff pointed out this one Former president of the American Chamber of Commerce in Latvia, jc Cole, because this guy still a dude, right, but like no, that sounds like I'm like, yeah, dudes, but still like, still probably a white dude.
Speaker 1But he, you know, we should all just accept a truth about our world, which is that dudes are often just fucking terrible.
Speaker 2And usually the wealthy people right Like it's usually a white dude not always, but usually, but anyways, this guy fits that criteria, but he seems to have a much more egalitarian mindset about how to do it and actually ensure his survival. So this guy, jc Cole, witnessed the fall of the Soviet empire And so we actually saw what it took to rebuild a working society from scratch. And so he says that that worry about treating people well and treating them well right now is quote quite accurate. The wealthy hiding in their bunkers will have a problem with their security teams, but also the concept may be expanded from just treating people well to a better system. This is where I really liked this guy. That would give much better results. You love systems. So, yeah, another thing I appreciate about JC Cole JC Cole, if you're listening to this, shout out to you and I'd be a part of your community.
Speaker 2Please hire me, because I could help you do things like this. He is absolutely certain there will be some kind of catastrophe, that we need this stuff, and he did a SWAT analysis, which is a man after my own heart. If you've never done a SWAT analysis, it's when you're considering what you want from the world or what you want to do, and then you think about the strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats of that opportunity to decide strategically how you're going to get there. It's like a really common strategy tool. So I did a SWAT to decide how to survive an apocalypse. I was like I love this man, dan, i'm leaving you for JC Cole, and he concluded that preparing for calamity required us to take the same measures as trying to prevent one. So, dan, what did JC Cole do?
Speaker 1He created some what he called.
Speaker 2American Heritage Farms.
Speaker 1Yeah, They're called American Heritage Farms. I'm looking for the word safe haven farm. They're based around like the New York City area And actually I think the one that exists right now is in New Jersey somewhere And the idea is that they're designed to be. They're designed to best handle an event and also benefits society as a semi organic farm Both in the three hours drive of the city.
Speaker 1So, like he's using permaculture techniques to create a sustainable farm that doesn't just benefit one billionaire but rather is designed for I think he said 10 families of five, who could then go there. Who are? You still have to be an investor in the farm, but the idea is that it could support up to 50 people, and not only could they survive there, but they could also use that farm to then produce food for people who are not part of the farm by selling their produce to people who need it. So it becomes like not only like a safe haven to survive, but also a revenue generating business after collapse.
Speaker 2Yeah, he basically says that in the article that he wants to develop a network of secret, totally self-sufficient residential farm communities guarded by Navy Seals. Still the Navy Seals. You gotta have those.
Speaker 1Navy Seals.
Speaker 2But what I appreciated about it is that he actually was talking about the issue of like food access, and the reality And I think we all got a very small taste of this with toilet paper back in 2020 is that our food, all of the things, get to us on trucks, planes and ships, and that can end really quickly. What did you say, dan? We're like three days away from total chaos and not having access to food for the average person.
Speaker 1Do I say that It sounds like something I was saying.
Speaker 2You said something you said like that, like we're only three days away before we're in trouble.
Speaker 1Yeah, truck drivers tend to say that it's three, like it'll take only three days for the grocery stores to be empty.
Speaker 2Yeah, and then people that lose their shit. So he's actually trying to restore regional food security in America with these networks of farms, thinking that if there is a catastrophic event, he is going to be able to maybe not immediately, but longer term welcome more and more people and actually rebuild society, instead of just hiding out in his fucking bunker swimming in his pool while everybody else suffers. So I like this guy. I think, as far as they go, he's one of the better ones.
Speaker 1Yeah, i mean it's, i think, yeah, i mean it's a much more sustainable idea and benefits society in a much better way than just like here's an underground pool, yeah, and he says here's a pool table in your pool.
Speaker 2That's one up bar. Right, you got to have that. But my favorite quote from him is that he says I am less concerned about gangs with guns than the woman at the end of the driveway holding a baby and asking for food. I don't want to be in that moral dilemma And that's how people should be thinking about this. I mean, frankly, all of us should be working together as a world to avoid. I hate to tell you everybody, it's not a zombie apocalypse we should be worried about. It's climate change. We should all be working together on that And building it especially Closed by climate change.
Speaker 2Climate change, yeah, as our food systems become more and more unpredictable. But yeah, that's what we should be doing, Like right now, that's what billionaires if billionaires actually put their money and resources towards addressing climate change and like halting it's the increase of global temperatures and then actually working to reverse the curve, which is possible. If we start right now, we wouldn't necessarily have to do any of this, Barring the zombie apocalypse And I guess everything's going to shit.
Speaker 1But, leah, what about increasing your profit revenues exponentially forever? For what reason? Because you want to be rich, leah.
Speaker 2All right. Well, you know you want to be as cool as your rich, billionaire neighbor. I want another one with a helicopter on it.
Speaker 1I'll have two helicopters on my yacht, yeah.
Speaker 2Unfortunately, i think that you are portraying the correct view of most billionaires, because JC Cole has not been able to get anybody to invest in American heritage farms as long as basically a year ago. People don't want to do it, he says. He says that they don't want cooperative components, they just want to go it alone And they don't want to have to learn to get along with a community of farmers or, worse, spend their winnings funding a national food resilience program. Their mindset requires safe havens. Be less concerned with preventing moral dilemmas than just keeping them out of sight, which you know what? That's also on par with what billionaires do right now. They are responsible for the death and suffering of billions, actually, and they don't give a fuck, they just keep it out of sight on their yachts.
Speaker 1Yeah, they don't have to see it. Hate them, yeah, and like to invest in one of these heritage farms. It's only like $3 million Only.
Speaker 2I mean, I don't have that kind of money, but we also have our own house, our own garden.
Speaker 1But you know, like for the modest billionaire, like what the fuck is $3 million? You can make $3 million in a week just by sitting there doing nothing.
Speaker 2Yeah, Hanging out in your pool getting a tone massage Yeah.
Speaker 1Like why not have both? You know why not have your own cool bunker? but like maybe outside the bunker you're like this is where the peasants live And like you can look at them like peasants, but you know what Those peasants are growing food for you. Like it can be both ways.
Speaker 2Like they can be the king of their own castle.
Speaker 1They're the king of their upside down, underground castle, where they live at the bottom instead of the top. But they could do both. They could also because, like they're stocking these bunkers with supplies, supplies that run out They're like this is enough for a year. This is enough for five years, and it's like, okay, cool, what about after that? Because that's how long destroying the world last is more than five years.
Speaker 2If I was a billionaire and I was making a bunker I would absolutely set up like an underground food growing system and have enough for a lifetime. Like I would not be sitting in five years, Why not?
Speaker 1have an above ground farm that you just spend $3 million on in addition to your multi-billion dollar underground bunker, and say hey, local farmers who want to survive, maybe you come survive at my house. I only want some carrots.
Speaker 2I don't know, because they probably see local farmers or basically any of us as like gross little peons that mean nothing.
Speaker 1Yeah, they don't want to deal with us.
Speaker 2They don't want us Look at us. They don't want to remember what they're doing. They don't want us to be alive. They only want us to be alive if we're making them richer. That's it.
Speaker 1If it's me, i want some fresh food, and the way to do that is to help other people survive too. With your billions of dollars, i still don't want to do any of the work, but if it's my billions of dollars, i can use that to maybe save a few families, and that's a kind of investment by itself. If you're going the billionaire route, why not?
Speaker 2I don't know. I think we should just get rid of billionaires. That's my solution.
Speaker 1I was considering becoming a billionaire, but you're right.
Speaker 2Oh yeah, because that's definitely the American dream We can all be billionaires, Right.
Speaker 1Yeah, I've been pulling really hard on these bootstraps. I think it's going to happen any one of these days. It's kind of like a rubber band effect The harder I pull, the more it's going to slingshot me to success when it finally happens To the moon. Yeah.
Speaker 2That's exactly how it works Well. I want to close with this quote, which basically sums up why I hate billionaires in the ultra rich and frankly capitalism that created these monsters. Roshkov says what I came to realize was that these men are actually the losers. The billionaires who called me out to the desert to evaluate their bunker strategies are not the victors of the economic game So much as the victims of its perversely limited rules. more than anything, they have succumbed to a mindset where winning means earning enough money to insulate themselves from the damage they are creating by earning money in that way. It's like, brilliantly said, let's just eat them.
Speaker 1It's my conclusion They might not taste good. I take back the ad that I made up on the spot a while ago. Maybe we just like we can pickle them. How about that?
Speaker 2Oh God.
Speaker 1I don't know. you know, We'll just can them and save them for later when we're really hungry, but I don't know if they're going to taste that good.
Speaker 2Pretending for a second that they are humans. Maybe we could just like to find a way to take over, take all their money and then, like, give them some sort of rehabilitative program, help them become human again, help them see the error of their ways. If Negan, if we can, if we can rehabilitate Negan, maybe there's hope for Elon Musk.
Speaker 1I don't know What, do you think Dan? Is Negan rehabilitated? I don't know. He has a spin-off show now, so maybe we have to re-explore that entire thing all over again.
Speaker 2He's somewhat. I don't think that he would do the same things all over again.
Speaker 1Yeah, because it didn't work out.
Speaker 2Yeah, he's, yeah, i don't know, but Negan would be a billionaire if he could, i think.
Speaker 1Yeah Well, I mean, we all would if we could, right.
Speaker 2No, i would not. I would. My wish for myself in the world is that everybody has what they need and is comfortable and is able to pursue the things that bring them joy and their family joy. That's what I want. I don't want to be a billionaire.
Speaker 1Yeah, you'd give away your billions, You'd still be a billionaire. I don't know.
Speaker 2Well, I wouldn't be if I gave it all away.
Speaker 1Yeah, but you would have made those billions and then gave it all away To give it all away.
Speaker 2No, i don't plan on making them myself, i'm just going to take them. Oh, i'm joking, Just kidding People who are listening. Let's go steal billionaires.
Speaker 1Oh good, Let's go. steal billionaires.
Speaker 2Oh goodness, yeah, unfortunately it would be harder than we think. But I don't think, you know, i don't think a version of a French revolution would be so bad.
Speaker 1Yeah For the world. I know a YouTube channel that has a guillotine, so Again, let's rehabilitate the billionaires.
Speaker 2I feel like it was my social responsibility to say that we shouldn't kill anybody, even though it's funny to think about it. But also, yeah, it'd be okay if they died.
Speaker 1Why, why, why do it yourself when a submarine will do it for you?
Speaker 2Exactly Just like we need more of those kinds of opportunities for billionaires to do it themselves.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2I think we've come to the end, Dan.
Speaker 1Yeah, so uh, we're getting close to episode 15. A couple more episodes will be there. We're reading Pride and Prejudice and Zombies by Jane Austen and Seth Graham Smith. It's a mashup of Austen's classic novel and a zombie apocalypse. I would like to know, let me know before that episode. I want to know what you liked about this book, if you've already read it. Do you like it? Let me know, i want to know. We'll talk about it.
Speaker 2In true book club fashion, of all the clubs that clubs have ever been a member of. I have not started reading this book yet, but I am the one who suggested it, So I'm going to, even though Dan has already told me he has very strong opinions. So we'll see.
Speaker 1I'm not doing a very good job of convincing people to read this book. You know what I've? I have heard people say that they love this book, so let's just leave it at that. Some people will enjoy this book, and you're going to hear what I have to say about it.
Speaker 2I mean, isn't it like kind of a perfect follow up to this Cause? aren't they also pretty wealthy people in private prejudice Yeah?
Speaker 1Yeah, the wealthy and affluent of the Regency era Fighting zombies.
Speaker 2This is like a literally perfect lead up to that. We'll see, yeah.
Speaker 1And also, please don't dancing at balls and talking about dancing and talking about various other types of things that you do, that rich people do.
Speaker 2Sipping some tea. Don't forget to subscribe.
Speaker 1We recently realized we never said that, so yeah, subscribe so that you get get one of those notifications. You know get find out when we upload. That's a good thing.
Speaker 2Yeah, we appreciate y'all. It's really fun to see our growing listenership horde, as I might say, and I've gotten a few best zombie survival tips. I'd love to have more. So please go ahead and rate and review us as well, and you can follow us on Instagram. That's where we hang out most of the time. There's also a discord.
Speaker 1Yeah, i actually took that out of the link tree.
Speaker 2Oh, shoot.
Speaker 1Well, I didn't have time to look at this cord a lot and there wasn't. There wasn't a whole lot going on at this court, so let's just stick to Instagram for now And then you know, we have a link tree in the description below.
Speaker 1That's where it has all of our things And you know, if there's, if there's other things on there, like if you're listening to those 10 years in the future and they're like, uh, they have a Facebook. They didn't say they have a Facebook. I'm not clicking on it, because they said they have an Instagram. How come the Instagram link isn't here? Well, maybe 10 years from now, something happened with Instagram and it doesn't exist anymore. So we're like an apocalypse. Yeah, There's an apocalypse. Only Facebook exists now.
Speaker 2Mark Zuckerberg is no longer with us.
Speaker 1He also like down a face Pocalypse. Now all social media is Facebook.
Speaker 2Oh my gosh. Yeah, Who knows what it'll be in 10 years? That'll be interesting. Oh well, I'll be dead. It'll be great, Well it's on Instagram.
Speaker 1We, uh, we, we post some stuff. It's funny, i think it's funny.
Speaker 2Yeah, Well, we heard your type five Dan It was good Yeah.
Speaker 1Should that be on?
Speaker 2Instagram. I don't know, we can give it a try?
Speaker 1Probably not.
Speaker 2But it's super hot here, and so what I'd like to do is go luxuriate in our blowup pool, because unfortunately, we are not billionaires and do not have an underground bunker swimming pool.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2We just have one that was 500 bucks and we blew up on our uneven land and is at risk of exploding and running all the way down our hill at any moment. Even our pool is above ground. Yeah.
Speaker 1But thanks for listening. If don't, don't get bit or do, And if you get bitten um tell your mom, tell your mom, yeah, tell somebody. You can tell somebody Don't keep it to yourself.
Speaker 2No, you can never give it to yourself. You gotta bite somebody else.
Speaker 1Yeah, bite somebody first, before you tell somebody.
Speaker 2Yeah, bite them and then tell them I'm infected.
Speaker 1Bye.
Speaker 2Bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye.