Tales from the Departure Lounge

#18 Bronte Neyland (Choose Your Own Adventure)

Andy Plant & Nick Cuthbert Season 1 Episode 18

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Life is just one big opportunity to explore. In this episode the TFTDL flight crew meet pro-vice chancellor for future students, Bronte Neyland  (Swinburne University of Technology) from Melbourne, Australia.  Living like a real life Dora the Explorer or Dian Fossey, Bronte loves the anticipation of getting up close and personal with nature. From gorillas in the mist to some of Australia's deadliest animals, she has been ticking off her bucket travel list, animal by animal from an early age. 

Also in this episode our love affair with Japan continues as we talk obscure festivals, earthquakes and adult nappies. Bronte reveals she is our second DVT patient on the show and takes us through her ritual of injecting blood thinner and giving 'fake' gifts to her children when she returns from her travels. 

Final boarding call: Rwanda 

This episode is sponsored by Loncom Consulting! Helping agents, language schools and institutions integrate and configure their CRM systems like HubSpot and Salesforce - check out www.loncomconsulting.com/education 

Tales from the Departure Lounge is a Type Nine production for The PIE www.thepienews.com

Andy:

Okay.

Nick:

Um, say that again Welcome to Tales from the Departure Lounge. This is a podcast about travel for business, for pleasure, or for study. My name's Nick and I'm joined by my co-pilot, Andy. And together we're gonna be talking to some amazing guests about how travel has transformed their. So sit back, relax, and enjoy the journey. Welcome to the podcast.

Andy:

Today we are joined by Bronte Neland. She's the Pro Vice Chancellor for future students at Swinburne University of Technology. Hi. And she initially takes us to see some gorillas.

Nick:

Yeah, this is inspired by gorillas in the mist, but she's also. Been to Borneo to see the orangutans, to China. To see the pandas. she's really passionate about zoology and animals.

Andy:

On top of that, she's married to a Japanese guy, and she takes us to some obscure Japanese festivals.

Nick:

She was really well placed to give us an insight into the real Japan, beyond the Instagram pictures, what the culture's like, including earthquakes.

Andy:

A time before social media back then that you didn't know what you were gonna get.

Nick:

Part of the attraction for travel for her is the unpredictable nature of it,

Andy:

And she's our second guest to have had a D V T

Nick:

get your flight socks back on. This travel has come at a price, which now requires regular injections

Andy:

of rat poison. She's the train zoologist who seeks out wild wonders and brings a whole wealth of experience from being chased by taxi drivers to how to survive earthquakes. Let's get some tails in the departure lounge from Bronte. Neland.

Bronte:

I often refer to my travel days as BC before children and, ac after children where you risk appetite, like hitchhiking across the border to Uganda. You're probably not doing that now. Don't make eye contact with the silverback. No sudden movements, Sadly there is no champagne in the departure lounges or anything in flight until very recently having to inject with a blood thinner she's like, it's an earthquake. It's an earthquake. And I'm like, no, it's a freight train. Don't worry. Literally choose your own adventure.

Nick:

Before we get into this episode, I wanna introduce you to a new sponsor to the podcast and a company that I am very excited about and that is Lancom for Education. We live in this digital economy, and I meet leaders every day from agents, academic institutions, and language schools who are struggling to manage all of their digital systems and data reports. They've invested in HubSpot or Salesforce, Microsoft Dynamics, or Zendesk, but they're only using a fraction of their potential. Long com are a team of logical, technically minded people who bridge those gaps. They actually slot straight into your team, and they do everything from cleaning up the data to CRM integrations while managing accommodation or home state bookings through channel management systems. But the real magic is when they help leaders produce better management reports and forecasting. This is the life blur of good strategy of investment plans and winning hearts and minds of new partners. We all collect data, but what are we really doing with it? And I'm telling you now that all you need is lancom to get ahead. They're here to solve your problems, unlock the full potential in your data, and grow through digital systems. So go to lancom consulting.com/education and select a time you want to chat. It's as easy as that. Now let's get on with the episode.

Andy:

Bronte, welcome to the show. So great to have you.

Bronte:

Thanks so much Andy. Really pleased to be here.

Andy:

So the first question we always ask our guests is if you could take our listeners anywhere in the world, where would it be?

Bronte:

I'd like to take the listeners to Rwanda, trekking to the mountain gorillas. As a. Animal lover all of my life and a zoology major in university. I had an absolute bucket list of destinations and animals that I wanted to tick off. I'm also the era of gorillas in the Mist, the story of Diane Fosse. So when I had the chance, I said let's go trekking and backpacking through East Africa. but the first thing I wanna do is Rwanda. That's not necessarily quick or easy from Australia. Flying to Kigali. then make our way to, the launching place to start your trek to see the gorillas. We set off in the morning, you've got, a local at the front and the back each with machine guns there is still a lot of poaching and then you're trekking through the forest and you've got guys with machetes paving the way. You're all hush cuz you're trying not to disturb any group and you're just hoping, who knows if you're going to see them. but then suddenly you get that indication and there in front of you is this family of gorillas. You've got the silver back, you've got the mother, you've got three or four others. And, and literally it's just awe inspiring And you're watching them interact. You are looking at the foot,, the bottom of the foot and thinking, oh my gosh, all of these similarities. And I just had tears of joy just streaming down my face of this is just one of my dreams. come true. understanding that evolution of us.

Andy:

So how close did you get to the gorillas?

Bronte:

Five or six meters away, you know, so you're close enough and it's, it's, you know, natural, they are very concerned around spreading of disease and so trying to respect that distance and not encroaching on them.

Andy:

What sort of briefing did you get, before you went six meters away from a gorilla?

Bronte:

Don't make eye contact with the silverback. No sudden movements, literally stay and freeze and a camera shutter is okay, but it is just, if the silver silverback does this, don't do this. and I think they were the kind of great days. I often refer to my travel days as BC before children and, ac after children where you risk appetite, like hitchhiking across the border to Uganda. You're probably not doing that now. Well, I'm not.

Andy:

that's much kinder than my wife who says before Andy and after Andy. So, uh, old days.

Bronte:

Is that then she's got another child? Or what's implied by that?

Andy:

Just another responsibility to burden.

Bronte:

I think also it's a different age that travel. you had your guidebooks, there was the internet, but there just wasn't that constant streaming through social media. We followed it up by safaris on the Serengeti. Climbing Kilimanjaro, relaxing on Zanzibar. You put an expectation on it, but you also were quite realistic. You went in thinking I might not see them. Um, and I think that was the same in subsequent safaris. I might not see a leopard. I might not see a rhinoceros. but I think that social media just means that, Maybe your expectations are set higher than what the reality will be because content is so curated.

Andy:

There's no surprises anymore. Are there? Nick is going to Japan. He can look on, Google Street view of his hotel is and he know exactly what it looks like. He can see all of the pictures in great detail and it takes away, some of the element of surprise and awe you might get, in the good old days.

Bronte:

In the good old days, some of those good old days, we probably don't wanna remember, but yes.

Nick:

Some people would say, I've seen some of these animals in the zoo, or in a curated environment like Disney or something like that. You've done repeated trips to see wildlife. What is it about seeing them in the wild.

Bronte:

It's a natural curiosity to learn more zoos certainly. Have a place in our society, but they are curated and to an extent predictable. But there is almost that adventure about will you see it? And that anticipation really is what's exciting going back to my zoology days and being able to put some of that educational experience, In real life for me, there's nothing, quite like it.

Nick:

Whenever I meet a zoologist, I always want to ask what the dissertation subject was on.

Bronte:

I've got Japanese as a major, I've got philosophy, I've got zoology and I've got environmental geography. clearly not designed for a career at all. Any of those. It was literally choose your own adventure and do what you like. My husband often laughs and, says to the, Kids when we are somewhere. Ask your mom. She did zoology and my recall is very low now. The skills come in is that analytical approach and being able to write papers and justify. That's where the science skills have been useful in my job. Now,

Andy:

That sounds like an amazing degree. I was just wondering how I'd sell it to a student.

Bronte:

literally choose your own adventure. I was then interested in traveling so much as well and probably travel that was to parts of the world that many of my friends had never been to Trying to pick off. Destinations that were a little more off the usual travel map.

Andy:

Where were they?

Bronte:

There's an animal and a mountain theme in what we do. Borneo was orangutans south America was the Galapagos and hiking down into Machu Pichu. four weeks backpacking around China, which having traveled to China for work was a trip that I had resisted for a long time, and my husband kept at it

Andy:

A lot of our listeners will have been to China for work. So where did you go

Bronte:

We went to a city called Pinya, which is one of the last walled in cities, and you cycle around it. We went out to ung Huang in gun Su province, which is out to the west. has a series of 500 caves that have Buddhist paintings in them. We had a week in Tibet, saw the pandas and so on.

Nick:

You are like Dora the Explorer. you've literally been everywhere.

Bronte:

My knowledge and travels to the US and Europe are absolutely appalling. I went to the UK for the first time in 2019 for work.

Nick:

You've not seen the foxes pushing over wheelie bins in urban Britain.

Bronte:

I have not, we have possums and we also have, crows and cockatoos that, have worked out how to open the wheely bins, but they don't push them over.

Andy:

I always find it embarrassing our top predator is, uh, a badger.

Nick:

Yeah.

Bronte:

Is it really

Nick:

Yes.

Andy:

Terrifying.

Bronte:

many venomous animals?

Nick:

venomous

Andy:

I don't think there's much here that can kill you.

Nick:

Because there's no animals that can kill you in Britain it means that we are terrified of other countries where venomous things live. I don't think other people really appreciate how much that plays on, the decision making of thinking, I'm gonna come to Australia, where the 10 deadliest snakes live, somehow we think that we are gonna be the one that comes across them.

Bronte:

I can't speak for the whole of Australia. most of us will have seen a redback spider or a tiger snake or something. If you tend to go out and about, in national parks or hiking it's not that uncommon. Sharks are probably a bit more uncommon, but certainly I've seen one scuba diving and then you just pretend that it's a dolphin. That's what you tell yourself.

Nick:

Yeah, I was gonna say, what is the, uh, protocol when you see something like this?

Bronte:

Denial. Just denial and hoping it doesn't notice you that you look like a seal.

Andy:

When I backpacked us in Australia, we went through the jungle and the guide who was showing us round, he took great pride in telling us that it was the deadliest snake in the world. The deadliest spider in the world. We were terrified. and then we went out to the reef and we jumped off the boat and they're like, you're fine. there's no sharks. Jumped off the boat and the first thing I saw was a shark. literally 10 meters away. I jumped in the shark. I was like, oh.

Bronte:

At times we do like to have fun with our visitors around, the potential danger, which really is. Non-existent in your day-to-day life,

Nick:

I went to Florida and we went on this swamp tour and there were some alligators and the guy made me turn with my back to them and have a photo with my son, and then he used a stick to basically swipe my ankle and I just obviously just jumped an absolute mile. My go-to nightmare is being eaten by an alligator or a crocodile.

Bronte:

And was that when he took the photo of you kinda air jumping

Nick:

My son looking cool, just like what?

Andy:

At least you go back into the food chain, Nick.

Bronte:

Sustainable tourism?

Nick:

Going on all of these adventures, you must have some misadventures here. You must have some stories where the guide was saying, right, we need to leave now, where you felt pretty unsafe.

Bronte:

One of the hairiest situations we found ourselves in was when we landed in ang late at night, we knew roughly what the taxi price should be from the airport to the hotel. We approached one driver, he set a certain amount and we're like, that's just ridiculous. We're not gonna be taken for a ride. So we then approached another one, far more reasonable, hopped in and start driving off. And then the pursuit from the other taxi comes and he's behind us, honking, yelling, gesturing, hands out the window. far more erratic driving trying to get us, run us off the road. And he follows us right to the hotel. So we do a quick check-in. It's the only time I've barricaded myself into a hotel room because he was as mad as all hell and we were just like, we don't know. Once our taxi driver goes, who knows what's happening here? I was in Japan for one of their largest earthquakes and, remembering cowering under. a table thinking, surely this will pass. and then you become a little blase about them.

Andy:

Well, I think you have to tell us more about that

Nick:

i, I'd forgotten about this.

Bronte:

You can joke about it now. At the time, it was the 19, 19 95 great hunching earthquake. And, we were probably three or four hours from the epicenter. And it was enough to wake. Us really shaped the building. I actually went as part of my university, program. And they did say, this is the basics of what you do, if there is an earthquake, Just seeing the distraction there and that sense of helplessness and just worry around, is everyone okay? Your mind racist to the worst case scenario of,, is my host family. Alive or are they buried under the rubble? And there was just so many stories of that because of the sheer number of people that died. Um, but then other times, when I was living there for work and every time a freight train would go past my apartment in Japan, my apartment would move. And I remember having another host sister come and stay with me. And the apartment started shaking. She's like, it's an earthquake. It's an earthquake. And I'm like, no, it's a freight train. Don't worry. We're all good. Just stay relaxed. She's like, turn that TV on. because they have these automated warnings that appear almost instantaneously on their broadcasting. And then it's like, earthquake warning, this is the, the degree magnitude and stay safe and whatever. And she's like, I told you, you need to take this more seriously. I was it's fine. I got a bit blase on some of them.

Nick:

So what is the protocol, please?

Bronte:

I was always told to try and. Hide under say, a table, a structure that will protect you, particularly from debris for falling. When I first started traveling to Japan and Taiwan and other locations, you looked at your university travel policy and they'd say, try and stay on the second or third floor or under six floors because there was something around how high the firefighters ladder could go up. I'm sure most of the listeners have stayed where the hotel might start on floor 20. So I'm not sure how you're going to comply with your travel policy in, in that situation

Nick:

Yeah,

Andy:

is sweating.

Nick:

I've watched Towering Inferno as well.

Andy:

this may be wrong, but historically, traditional Japanese buildings are essentially wooden platform, rice paper walls tot mats. And I heard that was because they were so used to natural disasters, be it tsunamis, earthquakes, fires, et cetera, that it was the quickest thing to then replace. It was almost expected, within a few years it was gonna get destroyed.

Bronte:

that is probably the case, I must admit. It wouldn't surprise me. There is also a different concept in Japan around, home ownership as well, I'm going back a couple of decades ago, but. You didn't move into someone else's house, that was considered a secondhand house in a sense.

Andy:

Outside of the big cities. There was the old house in the new house in a plot. So if you had enough space, you would just build a new house in the plot

Nick:

It's a big part of their aging population problem, isn't it? That they refuse to gentrify in the same way other cultures do. To sell and do up houses to allow what they perceive as foreign purchases and so on.

Bronte:

Yes, certainly there are a lot of issues around the demographics there and the declining birth rate as well. I think you might have multi-generational living either in one house or it's multi-generational living side by side as well. My sister-in-law certainly took on the caring responsibilities for, the grandmother, when she got old. There is that sense of responsibility, but as someone in your twenties who wants to come home from a night out to then be caring for an elderly person who can't shower, bath, toilet themselves, you know, I had a great appreciation and still do for what my sister-in-law takes on as, as that kind of responsibility, stability.

Andy:

Apparently, there are more adult nappies sold in Japan than nappies for infants.

Bronte:

Oh, the shelves absolutely. Show that. I think part of that's also the size of the adult nappies

Nick:

is that part of the cosplay thing that I'm supposed to take part in? Andy?

Andy:

Yeah, it's

Bronte:

Um, that may be an interpretation you have. It's not the one that I understand,

Nick:

okay.

Bronte:

but I do look forward to seeing photos of you in your cosplay.

Nick:

Oh, no. We did a poll on social media about destinations that people wanted to visit, and Japan was far and away the most popular destination Could you describe the culture of Japan, having a Japanese husband?

Bronte:

It's the traditions, and the celebration of seasons through their food and their activities. I came across a festival called Oda Matsui. So ODA Festival, and it's once every six years and it's deemed one of the most dangerous. Activities or festivals in Japan, and it's in nano prefecture, so one of the big skiing areas, but renowned for these beautiful forests. Every six years, as part of this ritual they cut down these ginormous logs and they are men attempt to ride them from the top of a mountain. To the bottom of the mountain and they invariably get flung off so there is an ambulance waiting at the bottom with the door open when I went. And men are getting flung off trying then trying to get back on. And because there's superstition around and prestige around trying to ride that log to the end. And I think there's maybe 16 logs that are rid written over this course of the festival. My husband's family, a few days before New Year's cooks up 80 kilograms of rice and pounds it in this large kind of mortar and pestle type scenario. But you are thumping it until, and someone else is keeping on turning it. So it's boiling, it's quite hot to make mochi. And it's a massive, you know, the relatives all get in. I guess it's a bit like some cultures have the passata and some have salami and so forth. And the whole family, you make this almost year's supply of mochi, which is the pounded rice cake, that goes into your dishes for the year, and they make the one that's displayed on the local, shrine for New Years and so forth. So there's all of those traditions and yet really modern as well. You step into the world of Tokyo and, it's just fascinating. It's so busy.

Andy:

Nick, I've got some good news the log Riding Festival is later this month and I've signed up for it.

Nick:

We do have a festival in the UK where we chase the cheese down a hill and, people break limbs all the time in pursuit of the cheese.

Bronte:

I can certainly recommend trying to find some festivals to go to in Japan.

Andy:

Dangerous

Bronte:

Well, if your appetite or your insurance won't cover you for that, there's probably some more sedate ones that you could go to.

Andy:

No, let's send him to dangerous

Nick:

There comes a point in your life where you have to push yourself beyond the limits and face up to

To your masculinity. And mortality.

Andy:

the only way to grow Nick or or die, the next section of the podcast is called any laptops, liquids, or sharp objects. What do you take with you when you go traveling?

Bronte:

I make sure I actually have full compression stockings and I think it was Amy who was talking about the knee length ones. I actually had them on when I got a D V T. So my life of travel has changed, Sadly there is no champagne in the departure lounges or anything in flight until very recently having to inject with a blood thinner before every flight. I did have a hairy situation, where normally they say, two or three hours in advance of flying that you should inject your blood thinner and I remember trying to depart China and, I looked at the cure ahead and I thought there's another hour till I get to the other side and find a cubicle to be able to, inject my blood thinner. My only choice is to try and do this discreetly in. Chinese, immigration. And thankfully I was well practiced enough that I could surreptitiously do it, but thinking this is really not the approach to take. So now I absolutely set an alarm the morning that I'm traveling an alarm to remind myself.

Andy:

shooting up in the queue. It's not a good.

Bronte:

Not a good

Nick:

Where do you inject it?

Bronte:

you inject it into, your stomach fat? In my case. Um, uh, but yeah,

Nick:

and I thought,

Bronte:

Sometimes I'd just be kind of window seat and thinking, I'm not waking everyone. I'll just do that

Nick:

You said that you had the D V T whilst you had your compression socks on.

Bronte:

yes. That was the downside of the Africa trip where it was ni Nairobi to London, uh, London, Singapore, Singapore, Melbourne, and it was that culmination of long flight, not walking. and a couple of other factors, not genetic.

Andy:

And what happened when you got it? The D V

Bronte:

I got back, had a. Had a pain in my calf and was like, oh, not sure about this, but thought, okay, I better get that. Checked out the next day, went to the gp. They measured the size of my calf compared to the other one. Thought, yep, that's a bit swollen. So you go off for an ultrasound, have it. diagnosed and then you are put in Australia. At the time, again, going back, you're put on something called warfarin, which is in effect rat poison. and it is a quick way of thinning your blood and it's the only time that I've ever had the pathology lab actually call me with results. for the first week, I had a blood test every day to check what the viscosity of my blood was. Then the second week, it was every second day until they got to a point that they thought you were stable. And so for six weeks I was on that, and then every time I travel more than three to four hours, there's a blood thinner. And then post giving birth to my children. It was six weeks of injecting with blood thinners every day, which is nothing for diabetics and so forth. So you just learn to deal with it. Um, Yeah, it, it took the shine off travel for a little while.

Nick:

And giving birth.

Bronte:

I'm not sure there was much shine to that initially. Anyway, the outcome's great. The process mixed.

Andy:

I've heard that actually. Yeah.

Bronte:

Um, yeah.

Andy:

you are our second D V T. On, on the podcast and we haven't had that many guests.

Nick:

have you tested for the factor five genome?

Bronte:

Yes. And I don't have

Nick:

Oh.

Bronte:

Combination of bad luck, I suspect

Andy:

The next section of the podcast is called What's the purpose of Your Visit? So why do you do what you do?

Bronte:

I think it really connects back with, hosting a high school exchange student just for a few weeks. Our school established a sister school relationship with Japan, which was often the case, late eighties, early nineties in Australia. My parents had always traveled a lot and lived overseas, just short stints. but they all always really encouraged that. And then went on to university, had my Japanese major, was lucky enough to go on six months to Japan, graduated, found a job in Japan and then really fell into international education. I love it because I think our societies benefit from the diversity, and the cultural richness that international students bring. Having lived overseas and in a country where you're speaking a foreign language, it's that empathy as well. I was denied apartments because I was a foreign woman. I couldn't get a credit card for a long time. Again because I was a foreigner.

Nick:

did you have grandparents at the time? When you started? This exchange with Japan. What did they think of that decision?

Bronte:

my grandparents. Nothing. I had friends, grandparents who refused to meet the exchange students, as well. And, and I, and so I understand that I also understand the hostility when my husband and I travel towards him in particular cultures as well. and I think there is the need for acknowledging the past. And I think when we look at Australia, there is certainly a long way for Australia to do that around our own history, towards our First Nations population, as well.

Nick:

I think it's such a big part of what we do breaking down those barriers, these perceptions in a positive way

Bronte:

I think we have come a long way and I also then think at times we probably don't, I'm always generally a forward positive person, I try and change or pave the way for greater understanding and respect and acknowledging the past, but looking at how do we facilitate, a path forward. It's very cliche. Hopefully you'll edit that out.

Nick:

Yeah, It was amazing how in the eighties Japan was seen as this superpower, this tech herb, and so many people put time and invested into learning Japanese for business culture. And now it's Mandarin, isn't it? Now it's young people studying business, but wanting a Mandarin element or an Arabic element. Amazing how that's shifted in a few decades.

Bronte:

It absolutely was. I think what's always interesting about Japan is that perception around their tech and innovation and the embracement of that in their day-to-day life. 1998, The ATM in the city that I lived in, 70,000 people, 25 minutes from a city of 3 million closed at 6:00 PM on a Friday night and didn't reopen till Monday. So you were planning how much money you were going to need to spend if you were socializing, what shopping you needed to do. credit cards really weren't well accepted then. It was still very much a cash society and you're thinking, how is this happening? and yet they've got mobile phones that received email that we didn't have back in Australia at that time.

Andy:

The last section of the show is called Anything to Declare. This is a free space for you to talk about whatever you'd like to.

Bronte:

Working at Swinburn University of Technology, I could wax lyrical about, how that's a fabulous institution. But I think for the listeners here, I think it's, it is really about making the most of the destinations that you have the privilege of visiting if you're working in international education, unfortunate enough to travel, and I think trying to immerse yourself in those experiences, but also being really mindful of reciprocating that hospitality that you often receive when you travel. When you have an invitation from someone to, to go to their house for dinner they are sharing something really personal, I used to be disappointed with colleagues when, those same people would come out to Australia and we'd host them for a lunch, but not in our private time. So we'd take advantage of that hospitality when we're in their country, but not give up, you know, our prized weekend

Andy:

big shout out to my mum, Sheila Plant. Uh, she's the only person that listens anyway. she said, if anyone invites you to their house, always say yes cuz it's an absolute honor that you've been invited.

Bronte:

I think your mum has very wise advice because it is your personal space. and I think people really do appreciate when they're invited in.

Nick:

When you're hosting inbound visitors, somehow it feels harder to give up your time to show them the same hospitality, even just, an evening meal and things like that. For some reason it does seem like hard work doing it in reverse.

Bronte:

I don't want to diminish that kind of challenge that you have when you are managing life, but I also think it enriches the lives as well. For my children to meet. whether it's our in-country representative. So they join us on the day trip down to the Great Ocean Road or so forth, or dinner out, and to try and open their eyes and understand, what I'm doing as well and what takes me away from them. In the early years my kids really resented me traveling and in their world it was only fathers that traveled, they didn't really know many other kids at their schools whose mothers went away. and so they took that a bit personally. I just tried to find who those mothers were and regularly highlighted that other mothers traveled and look at that. I'm not away as much.

Andy:

I'm not really, not really a terrible mother.

Nick:

at them.

Bronte:

and here's the Lego that I just got out of my gift cupboard, that you really don't care. Where the gift is from as long as there is a gift. If you have kids, just have a gift cupboard, ready as soon as you're home, because invariably you don't either have time to do it or they don't particularly want another key ring or fridge magnet from somewhere else that you've bought at the airport because you didn't have time or you totally forgot about them.

Andy:

I stopped buying gifts when I was traveling a lot because it was like Pavlov's dogs. I'd walk through the door and they'd put their hands out, you know, that was what they're expecting.

Nick:

I remember taking so much time to look for gifts, mainly because I felt guilty about being away from home And then you realize very quickly, they don't really care. I just learned to buy sweets that looked slightly foreign and just stock up on them.

Bronte:

Until they get old enough to Google and then work out that you actually hadn't bought them from where you said you had. I. To letters. so I would write them a card for every day, if it was a six day trip that they would open up in the morning to say, okay, it's Tuesday. I'm in this location. I know you are doing this. So they had felt a bit of a connection, but you never got them to open it at night because that's when they started to then miss you and get all a bit sad.

Nick:

Oh,

Andy:

That's good parenting. That is good

Nick:

now. Yeah. That is the difference between a mother and me.

Andy:

I feel great. Shame. Feel great. Shame, my previous life.

Nick:

I. Even stopped phoning home as much because like you say, it just made people miss each other and it just became more of a problem than a nice thing.

Bronte:

And I think as they get older, they're perhaps less interested, and they start to understand that you enjoy the serenity of not having to manage anyone else's lives for a week or two.

Andy:

Quite an abstract concept for them, isn't it? That you're just in this country. They've never heard of it. They dunno what you're doing.

Bronte:

As soon as my husband goes away, they go into this almost planning panic mode of mom can't cook, and I'm happy to ham that up for them. there is no need for them to know what I can and can't cook. We can just outsource or get, my husband to cook it all in advance. But now they're like, well, you are going, and I was like, yes, it's fine. Your dad is far more than capable to manage more.

Andy:

Daddy's in the corner pounding 80 kilos worth of rice.

Nick:

big, big. Shout out to the partners who stay at home.

Andy:

Yeah,

Bronte:

And any parents or grandparents that step in? I don't know how people do it if they don't have a broader network as well. it is that village approach.

Andy:

Bronte, thank you so much for coming on the show. It's been wonderful to have you.

Bronte:

Thank you both for having me.

Nick:

Hello everyone. Thank you so much for listening. As always, you can get in touch with us at Sick Bag at Tales from the departure lounge.com. Also, remember to check out a sponsor Lancom Consulting. They are already working with loads of agents and companies in the education sector. If you have a C RM system that you need configuring or you want to I integrating with something, if you wanna build an online store or you just want better predictive forecasting, Dashboards and analytics. Then check out Lancom Consulting. See you all soon. Tales from the Departure Lounge is a type nine production for the pie.

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