Dr. Benjamin Ackerman, PhD in Biostatistics | Principal Statistician at Janssen R&D

In this episode, we discuss what led Ben to pursue a PhD in Biostatistics, the important role of mentorship for support during his graduate program and guidance in finding a career path, and his advice for persevering in the face of challenges.

Hosted by Lois Dankwa

To connect with Ben and to learn more about his story, visit his page on the PHutures #100AlumniVoices Project website.

Transcript

Lois Dankwa

Hi! I'm co-host Lois Dankwa, and this is the 100 alumni voices podcast, stories that in inspire, where we explore the personal and professional journeys of a diverse group of 100 doctoral alumni from Johns Hopkins University. Today, we're joined by Ben Ackerman, PhD in Biostatistics and current principal statistician at Janssen R&D. Hi, Ben.

Ben Ackerman 

Hi.

Lois Dankwa

How are you today?

Ben Ackerman 

I'm doing well, thanks. It's great to be here virtually with you. Thanks for taking the time and having me.

Lois Dankwa

Yeah. I'm excited to dive in. I'm excited to learn about you as a fellow Bloomberg PhD folk. I'm excited to chat. So yeah, first, I'd love to hear what made you interested in pursuing a PhD in biostatistics and just learn more about your graduate work.

Ben Ackerman 

Sure. Yeah, what made me want to do a PhD in biostatistics. Great, great question. So, coming out of undergrad, and I also went to Hopkins undergrad, I I majored in public health, which I realized as an undergrad, is pretty unique. There aren't a lot of undergraduate programs in public health, and so, as an undergrad, I had exposure to a number of different facets of public health, and had grown really passionate about wanting to do some research or develop some career to help promote policies and research that improve population health. And I'd taken a few courses in biostatistics, and had a previous love of mathematics and statistics, and didn't really know what to do with it until I had found biostatistics and I guess the main reason I wanted to do a PhD was I still had no idea what exactly I wanted to do, and I I sort of had this taste of what biostatistics was from my undergrad experience and a very sort of narrow understanding of what a career in biostatistics could look like. And I really just wanted to learn more and dive a lot deeper into the methods, the application, what the many different career paths could look like, because at the time I I just didn't feel fully equipped to make career decisions on what I could do. All I knew was that I I liked the field, and I wanted to learn more.

Lois Dankwa

Yeah, I understand that. Something that's interesting is that or interesting to me is that so oftentimes, when we're introduced to something it's about, it's like we're we're introduced to specific topics. So, like public health, is a topic. Health policy is a topic. Immunization is a topic. But then biostats is like a technique method space type PhD. And I'm curious, or at least from my perspective. And I'm curious then how you, as someone that was pursuing, or that had a degree in public health, which is very topics based in my brain, how that really influenced how you thought about the work you were doing in your doctorate. But then also what you saw yourself doing afterwards. Was it? Yeah, I wanna hear more about that.

Ben Ackerman 

Yeah, that, that's a great point. I think Biostatistics itself contains a really wide spectrum of careers, of people who are drawn to it. I'd say, on average, most people I met in graduate school who were pursuing degrees in biostatistics we're folks who came from mathematics backgrounds, or applied mathematics backgrounds and found they wanted to do something a little more substantive in in terms of the applications as opposed to something more theoretical in math or statistics. And so, there were, there were others like myself who came more from like a topic focused background, like public health. But my experience was that was a little less common, and so I sort of thought as there's this spectrum of in biostatistics, you can be more focused on the theory and the methods, or you can be sort of towards the applied end of almost epidemiology like and then there's a lot of space in between. And so from the start, I was very much towards the end of the spectrum of applied statistician. And my motivation was really to understand the methods themselves, and the gaps in the methods that come up when people are conducting research and using statistics as a tool in public health. And so, I that's very much towards the end of what's not working with the methods we have? What are ways we can improve them so that our health research and the output of that research can have a better and broader impact?

Lois Dankwa

Yeah, that's so cool. And I I love that you recognized how you might have been different from your peers. But then you were able to go, okay, but that's good. That that's their lens, and that's their approach. But then this is mine. And I'm curious how you, I'm sure you had to do some types of mental gymnastics to remember that it was okay that you were approaching from a different perspective, and I'm curious how how you managed that, managed knowing that you were thinking about things differently than some of your peers.

Ben Ackerman 

Oh, yes, a lot of it it's a good way to put it a lot of mental gymnastics. You know, it was, it was challenging at times. A lot of the course work in biostatistics and statistics is theoretical. So, there were times, especially towards the beginning of my graduate experience, where I felt either inadequate or ill prepared when I'm taking all of these really heavy theoretical courses in statistics, and real analysis, and measure theory, and things I don't even like know how to begin describing, and I would have to constantly remind myself that you know any one part of the program is not the totality of the program. And the the theory and the you know, complex math is foundational and is one aspect of being a well-trained statistician. But it isn't the the full picture. And so, in those moments where I was maybe struggling to grasp some of the theory, or you know others coming from a pure math background were maybe more at home with with the content, I would just try to remind myself that you know, this is one facet of the job and of the training. It's not all of it. If it was all of it, then I think I would have reconsidered my my choices, and I think I was also really fortunate to have a strong support network, both with peers and with faculty at Hopkins and in the Biostatistics department, and I had mentors and role models who were more towards the applied end of the statistical spectrum as, I don’t know, I'm not coining that as a phrase, but I I had those mentors who you know have gone through degrees, have had to learn this material, and are now very successful at what they do. And and they were also really great reminders and advocates for me to keep going when you know it felt tough.

Lois Dankwa

Yeah, that's such a good point about how a specific moment in your PhD isn't necessarily, it doesn't represent the whole experience, It's a moment that will pass, and then there will be other moments that will be better, sometimes worse. But it's all, all part of the process, and we can really lean on the people in our community, whether they’re peers or faculty, or friends or family, in different ways, to really help validate us in our desired our desires and our interests and things like that.

Ben Ackerman 

Yeah, and and I think it works, you know, both ways as well. There were also times where I felt at home with what we were being asked to do in the program, whether it was programming or data analysis where I felt my experiences were, you know, I was able to sort of flex my strength, and could also then be support for others who those areas were newer.

Lois Dankwa

Yeah, also being while you were talking, it just occurred to me, or I remembered a thought where, being in a doctorate program is a good way of reminding yourself of all of the things you didn't think you could do. And you're actively doing them daily. Or like when you look back at something like first year doing like biostats and epi classes where it's like a past version of yourself might have struggled. But here you are doing all right, or learning how to digest that information. And it's it's a cool way to challenge yourself. But then also show yourself that you you can do hard things.

Ben Ackerman 

Yeah, and you know, there are also times when I I couldn't do hard things, you know, to to be completely honest. I, you know, failed one or 2 courses in my first year, and I think, in addition to realizing you know, these are tough things and we can do them, also being able to recognize I couldn't do this the first time, or I really struggled and got knocked down. But was able to get back up, or was able to, you know, rely on on my peers or my professors to provide support to help me get back up. So, it's it was a mix of both, for sure.

Lois Dankwa

Yeah, I honestly, I can that resonates with me. As someone who has both proved into herself that I can do hard things. I also have proven to myself there are certain hard things that I cannot do, and while they're uncomfortable and really disappointing in the moment, what I was able to learn from those was how not everything is for you and that's fine. But then also, I think it's really helped me in my doctoral program right now, where I I kind of notice how we're all on different journeys, right? And it it makes it easier not to compare myself to other people and stuff. But I'm curious then, for you in those moments what like what are lessons that you learned from realizing there were certain hard things that were hard? 

Ben Ackerman 

Yeah, I think one of the most important things I learned was how to be a little kinder to myself, especially at Hopkins, and in any graduate program, you know, everyone is very smart. Everyone is very driven, and it can be very easy to put a lot of pressure on yourself, or to feel sources of pressure externally, whether they're really there or not. And in those moments where I struggled and failed, trying to remind myself that you know this happens, and it's it doesn't mean I'm a flawed person or a bad researcher, or I shouldn't be here. It means that I struggled, and that's that's part of the the process. And recognizing that other people struggle either in similar or different ways. It's more about how you can learn from that and either, you know, try not to make the same mistake twice, or try to approach things differently that make you stronger, as opposed to trying to beat yourself up over not getting through things the first time.

Lois Dankwa

Okay. Yeah, no. Being kind to yourself is one of the truest things, especially in moments where you're in a pressure cooker. I think it also helps you realize other people have their own things that they're struggling with. So, it's both being kind to yourself and others. But that's a conversation I could talk about for hours, so we could continue to talk about that, but also in the direction of I'm interested in hearing about kind of the role of your mentors, and how they kind of helped support you but then, also as you were thinking about what you wanted to do after Hopkins, how did all of these experience influence what you were thinking for yourself?

Ben Ackerman 

So, I definitely, when I look back on my graduate experience, and even undergraduate at Hopkins, but particularly graduate, I really don't think I would have succeeded or gotten through it if it wasn't for the mentorship that I had. I'm really grateful for, you know whether it's the advisor I had for my research or faculty who taught classes, I gained a lot of important perspective from them, both professionally and personally, and really was able to develop a professional identity around what does it mean to be an applied statistician? And what does it mean to wanna, you know, help the world through statistics, from their advice, from their guidance, from the opportunities they provided. So, I think I approached it almost as just like, I'm an I'm an open book, and I just wanna sort of soak in as much as you'll tell me, and as much as you'll share with me from the people who who I had as mentors and I just felt very lucky that people invested the time in me to wanna see me succeed and and wanna see me develop an identity in a career.

Lois Dankwa

Yeah, no, I think that you answered it really well, and I I also think that it's there's so much that we can learn from the experiences of those around us and mentors in particular, they they've been in our shoes in some way, shape, or form, maybe not in the exact same way. But either through their experience as a mentor and faculty person, or through their own experience, they've seen a situation like yours before, and I think, even for myself, it guides me in terms of like me thinking about what types of directions I'd want to go in after my program. So, I get that.

Ben Ackerman 

Yeah, and I know a lot of people perceive, like, if you're going into a PhD program, there's this perception that you know what you want to do or you you know what you want your career to be, or what you want to research. I really had very little clue. Again, I finished college and I was like I I know there's a lot I don't know. I wanna go learn a little more and and figure it out later. And so I think the thing I I appreciated from my mentorship was just seeing different examples of what careers look like and what different paths look like, and what different perspectives look like. And just getting sort of a a really well rounded survey on what my options could be once I once I finish. And so, even well into graduate school, I mean, I remember in my third year I was thinking about my career and what I might want to do after finishing, and I still really didn't know. I knew there were topics I enjoyed researching. I knew there were certain levels of impact I wanted to have in in research, and it was just through watching others and gaining perspective that I was able to slowly build some guidance and direction as to what kind of jobs might fit with this path. And even still, now, I mean, does anyone really know? I I have a job, and I I have some purpose in it, and I enjoy it. But I think I still have a bit of that mentality of you know I'm taking in everything that people will share with me, and and that might shape where I go next.

Lois Dankwa

Yeah, well, yeah, it's it's funny that people assume a PhD knows exactly what they're doing next. But my brain instantly went to the clip from Toy Story, which is at this point, however many years old. But my brain went to Buzz or Woody telling Buzz that he was falling with style and not flying. And maybe that's what PhDs do, and we learn how to do: fall with style.

Ben Ackerman 

Yes.

Lois Dankwa

So, so my last question for you. I'm curious what inspires you right now?

Ben Ackerman 

Maybe maybe I'll I'll speak like professionally. I think I think one thing that I find inspiring right now is there's a lot of really neat and innovative research that is sort of pushing the bounds on what types of data we can use for health research. And to gain insights as to what treatments work and what programs work. Industry sort of calls it real world data as as a term of data that aren't traditionally captured or intended for research use, but are increasingly used to do so, and I find it inspiring that there, there's so much work out there trying to tackle different types of issues in using data that are not traditional in research and there's a lot of exciting work out there that has shown that data we never thought we could use for these types of studies can actually teach us a lot and can teach us different things than we might learn from running a a traditional randomized trial or designing a traditional survey. So, that's what I I look for inspiration in in sort of my professional statistical life.

Lois Dankwa

I certainly understand that it's exhilarating to think about the possibilities our work can go in. So, I get that. It's been so wonderful to chat with you today, Ben, to hear a little bit about your story and see similarities in our stories. So, thanks so much for taking time today.

Ben Ackerman 

Of course. Thank you again and best of luck in finishing your graduate studies as well. And I appreciate you taking the time again.