Taking a Massive Leap and Becoming an Authentic Entrepreneur | Ralph Riccio

So grateful to Ralph Riccio for joining me for this conversation!  Please check out his website to learn more or reach out:
www.eosworldwide.com/ralph-riccio
https://www.linkedin.com/in/ralphriccio/

Thank you for being here. Please subscribe and share if you feel called, and reach out anytime at https://www.fp-ct.org/

Transcript

Ralph Riccio: 0:04

just, again, I filed the heart, right, filed the heart of, I knew, and I, it was a tough conversation with my wife of like, Hey, I'm taking a massive leap. I want to quit the golden handcuffs, Really good salary, great vacation time, great organization, great benefits. And I wanted to take the massive leap and as scary as it was, and as scary as the four years have been. with some, you know, financial insecurity, ups and downs. It's entrepreneurial life. She was like, go find it. Go find your happiness. And she sees me come home on a Friday like I did, you know, last week. And she gets it. She gets it gonna make me cry this morning.

Peter Callahan: 0:45

Hello. And welcome to the fresh. Perspectives podcast. Where our intention is growing together. And leading with love. I'm Peter Callahan. And I believe we each have. Incredible capacity. To continue to learn and evolve. As individuals. And as a. Species. And bring way more. And love and a lot less fear. Fear. Into. The world. And our daily. Lives. Changing can. Be hard. And I found. That even. Even if nothing changes. Having the. Courage. To see. See our challenges from a fresh. Fresh perspective. Could change. Everything. I'm so glad you're here. And you just got to hear from Ralph Rickio, who I am so grateful to introduce here and have on the show. Just a little bit about Ralph. As a kid, he grew up watching his dad and twin brother run their small retail clothing store in Southern Connecticut. You'll hear some more about that, Seeing the joy in frustra. Frustration his dad had in running the business He became obsessed with learning what it took To run a truly great organization Some of the same curiosities that i have Ralph actually. I actually spent most of his career so far working on leadership teams of organizations of all shapes and sizes and building strong cohesive teams really helping them to identify solutions and overcome obstacles Ultimately driving revenue And stronger Team performance So most of these roles have been in the nonprofit sector for ralph Ralph including many years at st Jude children's research hospital Juvenile Diabetes Beatty's research found. Foundation and cystic. cystic fibrosis This foundation So some really The Meaningful work here and you'll And through those experiences he really understands the ups and downs of working with individuals teams and running A successful business And because of his dad's business ralph has a passion for small and medium sized businesses helping them Implement long lasting change that gets them better results Which is what ralph is doing now He. As an e Oh s you'll hear us reference that a lot at the entrepreneurial operating system so he's an eos implementer and he works with companies and leadership teams to help them get everything they really want out of their business and If Ralph, isn't getting to collaborate with a client You can find him Entertaining friends and family cooking an italian recipe at home or traveling with his wife michelle and three step kids grace kyle and lee And at some point ask ralph about truck driver friday It's his favorite day of the year and you're bound to get an invite in this conversation ralph and i talked about The riding the ups and downs of growing up in an entrepreneurial household Listening to what brings you alive and what authenticity and being honest and true to yourself Can really look like The importance of caring about people in the immense value Of supportive relationships in our life Ralph then walks us through some of The main tools of eos the entrepreneurial operating system and how small changes can really make a huge impact Which is of course one of the themes of All right, well good morning Ralph. Thanks so much for being here morning. Glad to be here. Excited to be here. Me too. It's kind of funny how we met in the throes of Covid. I'm just remembering back looking at, real estate. But I know we were talking about entrepreneurship as well and sort of both growing up in homes and families with entrepreneurship as part of the environment that we were living in. And I'm just curious to hear how you got started, what parts of your journey sort of have led you to where you are today?

Ralph Riccio: 4:40

For me, I, I grew up with watching my dad run his own clothing store. Him and his twin brother had a clothing store in Suton. and just watching, really the ups and the downs. And I mean, my dad loved what he did and I think he loved the people more than he loved the business though he did truly love the business too. But them go to work every day with the passion that they had for the work they were doing, for meeting people, I, I absolutely loved it, but I saw the highs and the lows. I mean, I was, was a kid when they had to close the doors, but I vividly remember when the, the big malls were coming to town and, and what that did to the, in the mid eighties, what that did to the downtown communities. And it really started to shut our doors. I remember the frustration and the sadness that they felt they had to close those doors. So they just, they, they couldn't keep up with the gap in the other stores. And even my mom, we were a bunch of teenagers then. And she would sneak us to the mall and, you know, get us a pair of gap jeans and we'd have to hide'em at the house. Cause my dad was like, wait, why aren't you buying Levi's? Right? weren't cool and as a kid, and so we wanted gap jeans, but you know, to some degree, We fed into the problem because we got bought into that. And so you missed those downtowns. And so they ultimately, they had to close their doors and, and couldn't do it anymore. And, I was a, I think I was a sophomore in high school when they closed their doors for good. A couple older brothers, older sister. I have a twin sister. and we all shopped there. It was men's women's children's clothing store and and they had to close those doors. And, and it was tough to watch I didn't realize it, but what I watched my father medical do was, was leadership and people development. They were so passionate about the people that worked there. dad died in 2010. They closed the door in the mid eighties and, Just last week I was on Facebook in a, in a local southington group and somebody posted a picture of my dad and my uncle the comments of what a great store, what great people. I loved going there. I mean, I get the chills thinking about it, right? great people, oh, I used to work there, working for them. I mean, you're talking years after they close the doors and people, and I still meet people today who are like, I knew your mom and dad. I knew your dad and your uncle. We shopped at the store all the time. It's really humbling to hear that to me that was their passion that came through and anyway, that I could try and carry that on, I think is what I've tried to do in all of my roles of leadership, working with people that my passion was about my people that I worked with, and it was whatever mission I was focused on as well, the people I worked with was really what it was all about. That's a long way around the barn, man.

Peter Callahan: 7:21

No, that's, that's beautiful. That's beautiful. Thank you Ralph. Yeah, the people. And wanna come back to this point that you kind of led with there. Like, they love the people even more than the business. I think there's, there's a bunch of themes in there. And as you're describing enough, I did get curious cuz we're gonna talk about business and get into leadership. It's a lot of what I love to talk about. And I'm just curious a little bit of what you were like as a kid. If there's, if there's any moments that come to mind or just sort of who you were. Cause it sounds like your brother was helping more with the store than you were. Right? Like what were you into back then? I'm just curious if there might be some pieces that'll filter forward into what you're doing now.

Ralph Riccio: 7:58

you know, it's a great question. Ever really considered that. as a kid, I think I was kind of the class clown a little bit. You know, I was just, I, I was the youngest of five kids, and so I was. just kind of goofy, kind of always looking for the fun time, always looking to have a good time. that took me, I didn't get into a lot of trouble. Somehow I got, I wasn't kid who got into a lot of trouble, most of the time. but I definitely, having fun. I, my cousin always told this story. he, he called me Ralph. He goes to Hollywood. I don't know why, but he just thought like I was a f you know, he was an older cousin by, I dunno, 10, 15 years. And he just thought I was a funny kid, loved my energy, always thought I was entertaining. And so that's kind of what I was as a kid. and it's kind of where I've, it just kind of, I've owned the personality. It is who I am. I will always try to find the fun things and what, whatever you're doing, even though work is serious. And I've worked in organizations where we're, you know, raising money to cure cancer or cure diabetes or cystic fibrosis doesn't mean you can't have fun doing that. Right. It's serious work. But, you know, we're, a heart surgeon, so, you know, I could, I could do that. You know, so,

Peter Callahan: 9:09

yes. I hope even heart surgeons can have fun. It's like you said, it's a as appropriate Right. When, it makes sense. level of fun, right? Yeah. you can do it. I think, you know, that's, and that's who I am. I think we gotta love what we're doing. We get one shot of this run around the sun, as they say. Right. Yeah, And so, like, enjoy it, love it. You know, I, I want people to enjoy whatever they're doing and, Definitely. Rough. It's awesome. And it sounds like nature nurture, you were able to cultivate a good amount of that as a kid. And it sounds like you had a pretty impressive balance from what I'm hearing too. You know, I was, I think I was probably a little bit less fun. I'd be the class clown, but I was a little bit angry inside and cynical, you know, or so I didn't get in a bunch of trouble either. Cause I was sort of clever enough to, to know where to push and where not to. But it sounds like you were even more lighthearted and playful while still having enough. The word that's coming to my mind is responsibility and sort of perspective, one of our keyword here on the Fresh Protect Podcast, but just knowing, you know, where the boundaries are and the lines are, having that awareness to try and, you know, whether we're not being intentional about it as kids. Right. But, all right, I'm seeing the world clearly enough. I'm understanding consequences to whatever degree. Certainly something I hope, you know, helping to impart as a parent, no idea how that's going, but, but it's just interesting the way you relate to life.

Ralph Riccio: 10:29

Yeah. No, I think I, I think, you know, responsibility is really key. And I, and I think back even to, you know, as a, as a teenager in college or in, even in high school, you know, you get into some trouble. Your friends are experimenting, you're experimenting a little bit. And I certainly did. you know, I've got teenagers in high school now and, you know, I, I can watch with an eye of knowing what. what they're likely up to. And and what we always talk about in our family today is, I think I just learned was responsibility. How to be accountable for your actions, right? make an a, you, you take an action. There's a consequence if the action doesn't go correctly or if you do something wrong, there's a consequence. And, and I learned that really early on. And I remember thinking back to my, my friendships and, you know, the one who was making sure everybody was safe. Who's driving, who's getting in the car? Where are you going? College, you walking off with somebody? I guess I was parenting a little bit more than I probably should have as a teenager, but, It served me well. And, and you know, I just wanna make sure again, everybody's having fun. Go have fun, but be safe doing it. And it was a conversation I had with my 17 year old just last week. You're in high school. I want you to have fun. but there are safe ways to have fun. Not 17 year old, you know, not fully formed frontal lobes kind of thing.

Peter Callahan: 11:44

Yes. Yeah, of course, of course. That's a, that's great that you can have those conversations and I'm also hearing the word care, like you care about people Want to have their back, and to me this is one of the ultimate themes of leadership. Do people feel like there's a sincere care there? And my experience as kind of a recovering jerk as I was just so insecure and so worried about other's judgment or people liking me, how I was perceived, that I was getting in my own way of just sincerely caring and, and trying to support others in a genuine way that. I hope I'm better at now, or Ralph, but it's, it's really awesome to hear, and it makes a lot of sense why you're so good at what you do now that you've sort of had this care that's carried through and you've just been experimenting to use the word you were just speaking to of all different ways to do it. my brother, so we both, I know I've worked with our brothers in the past and my brother's sort of theme, I think my mom kind of came up with it, but was, is taking fun seriously. Much more so than me. He had that lighthearted, it really matters to enjoy yourself and the what you're doing is less important than how you're doing it, right? Having this attitude of enjoyment, and I just know from the work I do, Ralph, so many people have a really tough time, myself included. Staying in touch with that and trying to hold things, be responsible, but hold things lightly enough to be playful and not feel like everything in life is just work and something to survive or get through.

Ralph Riccio: 13:09

Yeah. and I think authenticity, right? When you, when you said Kara, I mean, it's about being authentic and listen, there's times I get it right and there's times I get it way wrong. we all do that. And that's, that's remembering this perspective again, that that word, right? That, that we are all human beings. And, and I've have it had incidents where I thought I was doing the right thing and boy it didn't play right. And others, other's perspective was that it wasn't the right thing, right? And so being as authentic to yourself as you can, and, and I struggle with the same insecurities that you talk about. There was probably a period for me that I was in. I think in college I was really, there was really mad, angry phase. I don't know what the heck it was about, I do look back and think on that. And, and again, it was about, but try being authentic to yourself. And I struggle with that insecurity even today, probably who I'm talking to or who I'm working with. Right? I mean, you know, I have a ton of respect for, for people who've put these businesses together, these CEOs, these big companies, and there's some days I'm like, boy do I, do I have what it takes? I have my perspective. What I, what I love to do is hear others and bring that out of them. Right? I think it's, you know, just we live each day being our authentic selves. what your mom said, that's the serious fun. I think it's really, it's super cool. And, and it is. It's like you can have fun and do your work. I have a client watching him work with his team. They have a million and he's, you know, he built this business from the ground up but man, they have fun and is one of their core values. One of their five core values is have fun. because he wants everybody to enjoy what they're doing. If you're not, they're, you're not gonna get your best out of them. And that's what it is for me too.

Peter Callahan: 14:53

Yes. Amen, Ralph. I've given a presentation called Get More Done and Have more Fun, and I'm all about the, and you don't have to take away from each other, right? The butt erases it.

Ralph Riccio: 15:04

they feed each other. Right.

Peter Callahan: 15:06

Yes.

Ralph Riccio: 15:07

feed each other. If you're enjoying what you're doing. That's why it comes to passion for me, right? Having that passion for what you do and love, love what you do. Never work a day in your life because you're gonna have fun doing it. You know, I have on Friday and you know, I should have been exhausted. I'm on all in, in front of my clients for eight, nine hours. I'm teaching, I'm teaching context, I'm facilitating, I'm coaching through, I should have been exhausted. I came home, I was like, okay, let's go for a 40 mile run. because I was just so juiced by the energy in that room and having so much fun working with them. So, is pretty, pretty incredible.

Peter Callahan: 15:43

yes. For the record, do you, do you do Ultramar? Did you go for a 40 mile run? Because that, I still can't even no. I get mile car ride maybe. Okay. Just checking. no, Just checking. I've done, I've done a couple half marathons other Yeah, same, it's, it's been a while. The old are not what they used to be, Totally. I count combining half marathons means we've run a marathon, so it's, the box is checked total if you add it together. But,

Ralph Riccio: 16:09

for sure

Peter Callahan: 16:10

and you know, one thing I do, I just, I love to channel whoever might be listening in the skeptical or just the resistance to this. So I just wanna bring this up as a, as another conversation piece, Ralph. And maybe we can. Move into sort of how you chipped away at finding this love, this passion that you experienced. And I have a lot of that now too. I'm really grateful and I've, I've talked about that in a couple previous episodes, but just being able to acknowledge for me, I still have plenty of days, or at least periods of the day where I still feel like I'm working and I'm doing only what I have chosen to do very intentionally over a decade of running my own business almost. And it still can be challenging for me to, so I have some inner resistance to that never work day in my life. Like, well it would still look different for me if I wasn't remotely worried about income and revenue. And I like to ask clients that question, but, so anyway, I'm just curious what comes up for you. Cause I know you don't mean that you're just floating on Cloud nine in a total flow state every hour of every day. Mm-hmm.

Ralph Riccio: 17:10

no. I definitely gotta work. There's highs and lows, there's anxieties, we're in our own business. we've, got to fish, and there's days where you're like, all right, business as well. Income is good. there's days where it's like, oh, wait, I gotta keep generating business and generating business. Working, doing that. I will talk to anybody about what I do because I love what I do, and so it doesn't like work. Now there's days and, you know, before we jumped on here, I was looking at QuickBooks and I that's not something I love to do. In, in E US we talk about a tool called Delegate and Elevate. How do you delegate all those things so that you can elevate that you don't like to do and don't love to do, so you can elevate yourself to those things you love to do that are within your unique ability, That you love to do. And so we use that tool, we help people with that tool to understand it. How do I start to do those things? So, you know, at some point I'll delegate off all of my financial stuff to a bookkeeper or something. And so it's, it's really to getting to your place where you're doing what you love to do. What I love to do is be with my clients or be out talking to people about it. My wife laughed that last week. I golfed, I had three golf tournaments last week, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday. Right. And I'm not a, you know, I am nowhere near a great golfer at all. I enjoy being out there. and she was like, oh yeah, rough week for you. And I said, Willett, it is really, truly business development. I mean, I talked about what I do with a whole lot of people last week. It was a great opportunity for me to talk about the work that I'm passionate about with the kinds of people that I wanna work with. And, and I, so I was, you know, I was working last week, but I was loving what I was doing. I was and talking about e os and so, kind of how I see it. I don't know.

Peter Callahan: 18:52

Yeah. That's great Ralph. That's great. Delegate and elevates. All right, so we're gonna get into e o s, which is the entrepreneurial operating system for those following along at home. But let's maybe keep the story going first, Ralph, if you're up for it. Like how, you know, you've had all these different roles. You don't have to go through your whole, you know, LinkedIn profile here, but I'm just kind of curious what the evolution has been, how you wound up here,

Ralph Riccio: 19:16

yeah. I, you know, I had a, a really great career. I always blamed my dad. I always said my, my dad was the reason I got into the nonprofit sector. He owned his own business, did really great things with his twin brothers we talked about. They also were really heavily community minded, and that just kind of, I kind of fell into it in college. I started volunteering in high school, volunteering in college, and just started having this passion for a non-profit and helping those, Caring for other people and helping those people who needed it in some way, shape, or form, which led me into a career fundraising. But, you know, I had this conversation with a cousin recently and, and he's been a great, coach for me over the years. He's a, a bit older and I said to him recently, I was like, you know, I'm not really a great fundraiser. And he was shocked. And he said, what? He goes, I thought you were like one of the best fundraisers I know. I said, no, I'm really great at the people piece of it. Really putting the people, the right people in the right seats and making sure they know where they're going and how they're gonna get there and getting the tools and the resources they need. I'm a great leader of people. I just happened to do that in fundraising cuz it was what I was passionate about. I woke up one day about five years ago and I wasn't passionate about it anymore and I was working for one of the best missions in the world, St. Jude Children's Research Hospital, right? incredible mission and incredible organization. But I wasn't passionate about it anymore. I loved the people I worked with, but I knew I needed to do something different. So I spent the last probably, I spent about three and a half years on a journey of trying a couple of different things that got into real estate. That's how you and I met. some work with my brother had read the book Traction, which was back there behind me by, Gina Wickman, which is all about the entrepreneurial operating system. And I realized I loved what I was doing, and loved what I read in that book and started helping my brother and his business implementing some of the tools of e os, and was like, okay, wait a second. There's something here that I like really am passionate about. So, I was doing some non-profit consulting and this client that I was working with was working with an EOS implementer, and they invited me to one of their session days and I think it was about minutes in. And I, like, I, my eyes were big, I was kind of salivating a little bit. And the implementer, who has become a, a good friend now. We were on a break and just, I was like, so tell me a little bit more about what you do. And she just looked right at me and she said, you know, you should be doing this work. She said, I can tell already. that led me on my journey to where I am now. That was probably just over a year ago now, that we were in that session day. I spent that summer kind of get myself ready and off to Detroit in August of last year and got trained as an the OS implementer and have been running my business ever since. So it's kind of where I, how I got to here today.

Peter Callahan: 22:00

amazing. Amazing. Thank you.

Ralph Riccio: 22:03

just, again, I filed the heart, right, filed the heart of, I knew, and I, it was a tough conversation with my wife of like, Hey, I'm taking a massive leap. I want to quit the golden handcuffs, Really good salary, great vacation time, great organization, great benefits. And I wanted to take the massive leap and as scary as it was, and as scary as the four years have been. with some, you know, financial insecurity, ups and downs. It's entrepreneurial life. She was like, go find it. Go find your happiness. And she sees me come home on a Friday like I did, you know, last week. And she gets it. She gets it.

Peter Callahan: 22:38

Yes. Yeah, that's what I was gonna say. It's amazing to hear that supportive partnership and

Ralph Riccio: 22:43

Yeah.

Peter Callahan: 22:45

how that trust can help you take that leap. And you know, part of me is wondering, Ralph, how much the entrepreneurial environment that we were talking about earlier that you grew up in, led to that courage, self-assurance as well to, to leave those golden handcuffs. Cause I, what I was really surprised about too, the other threat I'm hearing is that you loved the people you were working with.

Ralph Riccio: 23:10

him.

Peter Callahan: 23:11

so to, so, so it sounds like it was really, the work itself wasn't giving you energy cuz a lot of people I talked to. To your point from earlier, like, yeah, the job's okay, but oh my gosh, I have some wonderful people here. So I don't, I don't think about leaving because it's just great to work with these humans and when you feel like you have trust, that can give you that autonomy, the flexibility, some amount of work life balance, depending on the overall company culture, but just people who know you're working hard, you know, they're working hard, you're all in it together, rowing in the same direction. And then you had the shared purpose of St. Jude's, I mean like one of the world's foremost nonprofits.

Ralph Riccio: 23:44

yeah. Without a doubt.

Peter Callahan: 23:46

yeah. So what, what do you feel like was missing, specifically? What comes to your mind?

Ralph Riccio: 23:52

you said it a little bit. I think for me, it, some of it was that entrepreneurial, could I do it, you know, could, my dad did it. my brother Mike it for years. and at that point was starting another business with my nephew, his son, and I really had this drive for this entrepreneurial drive to do something. And I didn't know what it was yet. And that I just was like, I, I want to go. I, I gotta go try it. I, I gotta go try it. You know, Gary Vanderchuck says all the time, like, doesn't matter if you're 20, 30, 40, 50, or 60, go, go try it. Go reinvent yourself. If that's what you need to do to go live your best life, go do it. And I, and I believe in that wholeheartedly. And so I, I took, I, I, it is, it's the entrepreneurial leap. I just, I was like, I gotta do it. And so I couldn't put my finger on what was missing. Because I did, I had a great team. I loved working with that team. Still talk to a good number of them today. Some of them have worked on consulting projects with me or I with them. we, I coach a couple of them still. you know, and, and then they coach me back at the same, in the same vein, really. And so, great people. And I just, I just knew something was missing. Couldn't figure, put my finger on it. And I think it was that spirit of like, it was in there somewhere. I just didn't know it.

Peter Callahan: 25:12

Yeah. Yeah. I don't know, but I've got to try.

Ralph Riccio: 25:16

I don't know, but I've got to try. That's what it was. was. And I, I could get up in the morning. I'd be like, I used to say, I get to go to work today.

Peter Callahan: 25:27

Yes.

Ralph Riccio: 25:28

I get to go to work today. I couldn't say it anymore. I, turned into I have to go to work today. In part of it. I'll tell you truthfully, I was traveling about 75% of the time for work, like leaving the state of Connecticut on APL jet plane. I was, I was in Memphis probably every other week for, for years at a time, somewhere else in the country. and I also, other piece of it for me was family. I, I got married late in life. My wife had three kids. So when I talk about my kids or my stepkids, and, I was gone 75% of the time and I got married cuz I really loved my wife. I really loved my her kids and I wanted to see them more and be around them more. And that was not allowing me to do that. and so missing piece of like, I don't know what it is, and I wasn't spending time with my family. It was, it was, it was really, truly an easy decision. it was, January of 2019 I woke up one morning, I called my boss, I said, okay, I'll be done in March.

Peter Callahan: 26:37

Wow.

Ralph Riccio: 26:37

gave him, gave him two months. And, and an amazing culture. I mean, it, it was hard to leave. My mother-in-law lived with us at the time, and she died in 15th of that same year. And really my last weeks were spent taking care of her and, you know, grieving her loss. And they were like, you gotta take care of your family and yourself. It doesn't compute. Like, why do you leave great people, great culture, great mission. it's all right there, you know?

Peter Callahan: 27:08

Yes.

Ralph Riccio: 27:08

So that's it. And I, again, I think I owe it to my parents, my dad, watching them. Even, you know, my mom. She had a similar passion, and just drive for doing what was important and what was right. So, gonna make me cry this morning.

Peter Callahan: 27:24

I appreciate you sharing this, Ralph. It's, it's incredible to hear this courage. I'm gonna guess you were scared at some points too. Like you didn't have just bubbling self-assurance that, oh, I know I'm gonna make it.

Ralph Riccio: 27:34

No. Every day. Terrified, dude. Even today, years later, my EOS business is going well, you know, it could be going better, but I think every entrepreneur is gonna say that we could be doing better. What else could we be doing? I could be doing more. and every day is fearful because if I don't do it, who will? Right? Yeah. My wife works, she has an income. That's great. But, we've gotta be doing, and there's, there's fear every day, but it's what gets you out of bed, I think, right? It's not letting that fear consume you. It's l letting that fear drive you and push you. And that's what we, you know, that's what we gotta do, is that's the, that's the engine. The fear is the engine,

Peter Callahan: 28:12

Hmm. Reminds me of the, I think it's often attributed to the Cherokee tribes, but sort of indigenous Native American wisdom, the story around the two wolves, and they speak to, we each have two wolves inside of us. The Wolf of Love and the Wolf of Fear.

Ralph Riccio: 28:29

Hmm.

Peter Callahan: 28:30

And the story I've often heard is a grandchild is asking a grandfather, well, you know, how do you, how do you survive? How do you not be, you know, overtaken by the fear, the wolf of fear? And he said, well, the, the wolf that thrives is the wolf that you feed.

Ralph Riccio: 28:46

Hmm. Ooh, I love that.

Peter Callahan: 28:48

And so how do we go about feeding this wolf of love? Cuz it's, in my experience, not a lot of the cultural messaging that we're getting,

Ralph Riccio: 28:57

No,

Peter Callahan: 28:58

right? To have this abundant mindset and to have courage. And the quote I have up on my LinkedIn at the moment anyway, is from Howard Thurman, who's an activist and he sort of says, you know, don't do what the world needs, find what you love and go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive. And I'm really hearing you speak to that like, I, I get to go to work. That's what we want to be moving toward, right? And there's a lot of variables and a lot of factors. We've gotta be, you know, based in reality as well, and take care of ourselves and our family, and how can we chip away and learn and grow and then take small risks and then maybe a big risk, and having a partner to support you so you're not totally alone. Jumping into the abyss can be really valuable too, is what I'm hearing.

Ralph Riccio: 29:41

Yes. I mean, how many people do you talk to? If you talk to 10 people today and you ask them, do you get to go to work today? How many of them are gonna say yes? Do you get to go to work today? Right? How many people talk about that? Well, yesterday it was Monday night anxiety and maybe a little Celtics anxiety, but,

Peter Callahan: 30:02

It's a tough game.

Ralph Riccio: 30:04

that's a tough game. but how many, talk about that Sunday night anxiety, right. Of like the, the panic attacks that sit in on Sunday night. Cause they gotta go to work the next day. I was excited. I mean, you know, I was getting to talk to you this morning. I was really looking forward to this conversation. and just thinking about, some outreach I've gotta do to some clients, some prospects and, got a text before that some folks I met with last week, or they're ready to get going and they wanted, they wanted to start their e US journey. I mean, I can't wait to get started with them I didn't have that anxiety if I, ah, God, I have to go and go to work. Right. I mean, I also walked downstairs to my basement to my office. So my commute was a lot easier than most.

Peter Callahan: 30:42

That's true. That's true.

Ralph Riccio: 30:44

so.

Peter Callahan: 30:45

Well, it's these phrases of I have to, or I should even, I need to, to some degree. One of the ways I like to reframe those is, well, there's always a, because I want afterwards underneath that, right? There's a subconscious need or desire, something we're trying to get to that we believe that will give us. my question is often, how connected to that are we? Are we, can we remember? Are we aware, well, I need to go to work because I want to provide for my family and I want to set myself up for retirement and the short term and long term. Come in here and do I believe this is giving me the best chance of thriving, of feeling alive, of finding things? Or are there other things that I could be doing? And again, it could be really hard to make the time to sort of acknowledge, be honest with ourselves, like, nah, I'm really, I'm really heading toward burnout right now. I'm feeling exhausted. I'm feel like I'm just on this hamster wheel not getting anywhere. How can I carve out five or 10 minutes a day to do a little learning, to reach out to someone new, to do something different? But that can be really hard. It takes a lot of prefrontal cortex, executive energy to break out of our habits and behaviors and not just understandably, the moment that we have finished everything we absolutely have to today. To on the TV and just like, I need to relax and chill or go to bed, or whatever it is. I, I get it. And it's amazing how far tiny steps can get us if we set an intention, begin to experiment and start chipping away. And that's, I mean, that's the kind of work I love helping people do in life from scratch and in business. And I'm, I'm getting curious to ask to, to really ask you to start to help us learn a little bit more about how you'd go about doing that. So you've, you've got this passion for it. So give us a little bit more about eos

Ralph Riccio: 32:36

I'm gonna step back and tell a quick story. I'm not ashamed to say that, you know, I ebb and flow with exercise and weight and, you know, need to do some work today. Years ago, I joined Weight Watchers. I, I did Weight Watchers. And the, and the thing that stuck to me the most was, the coach I was working with at, that time said, a penny is the smallest of change that we have in our society. And if you just make that tiniest bit of change, you will have impact. And was, you know, instead of eating a chocolate party to celery or whatever that thing was, to make a tiny change and it will have a positive impact. And I've carried that with me. I've, oftentimes have Penny on my key chain. I actually have a penny. with a whole drill through it on my key chain. So I see it all the time, the tiniest bit of change. so it actually has a heart in it, not a penny. But, it's, always reminding me that just make a small change and you're gonna have a positive impact. when we talk about e os, one of the things we talk about all the time in e os is less is more, when we're working with leadership teams, is more. When we talk about setting your goals for the year, three to seven, not 27, Because as entrepreneurs we're like, well, yeah, I could do that as visionaries in particular visionaries are, are so high level. They're looking at everything from 60,000 feet and they have a million ideas and they show up to every meeting with 20 different ideas, and they're ready to go and point their people and start telling'em to go chase it. And you gotta pull'em back, pull on the reins and go, hold on. But what do you have to prioritize? What are the three to seven most important things you've gotta get done? This year over the next 90 days. And really focusing them on those things and keeping them laser focused with intention on getting those things done cuz that's what's gonna have the greatest impact on their business. Not all of these like really fun ideas that they want to chase.

Peter Callahan: 34:28

A hundred percent.

Ralph Riccio: 34:29

that's, we do a lot of work on that. And that goes back to that penny, that small change. don't have to do a hundred dollars bills worth of things, do a couple of pennies. things are gonna have great impact.

Peter Callahan: 34:43

Amazing. Yeah, it's, I think wanna say it's a Warren Buffet quote. If you have 15 priorities, you don't have any.

Ralph Riccio: 34:51

it might be, I think you might be right on that. Yeah. You can't, you just can't. So we, we talk about rocks in eeo s rocks are 90 day priorities, right? And I'm sure you know this context, it's take that, that glass cylinder. And what we do every day is we fill with sand and water, we just start responding and reacting to everything that's going on. we don't get any of the big stuff done. And so, e o s, we say every 90 days, reset your rocks, reset those 90 day business priorities. Start with the big things, let the little things fill in. And it's about just keeping you laser focused. And again, it's three to seven. Rocks for the quarter. What are those, what are those big things you've gotta get done in the next 90 days? If you don't, it's gonna have a massive impact. And then, you know, we teach other ways of dealing with the sand and the water and the tiny stones that are coming in. We teach you how to deal with those things. stay laser focused on the big things, right? Because if you have 15 priorities, you got nothing is more. And it's so scary, especially for a real true visionary entrepreneur to think about, you want me to do less and I'm gonna get more out of it? They, they, it's really

Peter Callahan: 35:58

It's counterintuitive.

Ralph Riccio: 35:59

hard.

Peter Callahan: 35:59

Yeah, absolutely.

Ralph Riccio: 36:01

They just, it's fun to watch too. I mean, it's real fun to watch. I, my, I think I mentioned earlier, my brother did a, a big open house, probably two, 300 people this house who just renovated on the shoreline, last week. And one of my clients was there, and he's a home builder. and and he's looking around, he's a production home builder, So, you know, they've got a process that they do in their, in their homes and their, his homes that he builds are stunning. But I could see his eyes looking around he's like, looking all over my brother's house for my brother. His, his houses are, are canvased to him. That's his art, and my client is a visionary, was getting all excited. He's like, well, we could do, and I was like, no. And he's like, but we couldn't. I was like, Nope. know, let's get pulling him back. Pulling him back. what it was gonna do to his team when he went back to the office said, Hey, I saw this house and we could do all these really cool things. Right? And it was fun to have the conversation with him. to see his excitement and he is gonna, he said he wants to think about other ways he could, he could use that visionary spirit so it doesn't derail his business, you know?

Peter Callahan: 37:03

Yes. Right. Putting those boundaries. I work on this with, with some leaders, the structure and One of the fears I hear, I hear this from people in their lives just on a day-to-day basis, and then leaders at work. Well, how much intention or planning time should I take? You know, I always invite folks to start, well, let's just set an intention. Let's write down the most important thing and have that as a reminder, the most explicit thing. That's a really helpful first start, and then how many layers down do I go? Do I dive in fully with Ralph and like set up this whole entrepreneurial operating system? Or do I just, you know, set my three priorities? And the resistance I often hear Ralph, is, well, things come up and I need to respond to them. Part of my job as the leader, as the founder, my family, kids are sick, something comes up, I need to react to that. And planning can just get in the way because then I'm trying to hold onto this plan where what I really need to do is flex and respond to this situation. And so it holds some of us back from doing any planning at all because it can feel like it limits our freedom. And I love this phrase, freedom within structure, but it doesn't inherently just clarify well, how much structure, how much time do I take the plan? Cause I need to spend the rest of the time trying to execute that plan. And then dealing with, you know, putting out fires, responding to things, reacting when things come up.

Ralph Riccio: 38:20

Yeah. Yeah. Well, what EOS does for, my clients and, and for, you know, the, don't know, 20,000, 22,000 companies around the world right now running on eos I is, we, we're real. It's realistic to the fact that you've got to have that flex in there, But what tools and disciplines and resources do you have to deal with those fires as they come? So you talked about structure briefly and structure, I hear it, is like we talk about our accountability chart, are you accountable to and what are you accountable for? It looks a lot like an organizational chart, but at the end of the day, it's about what are you accountable for? Because when multiple people are accountable, nobody is, and that's what we're trying to help understand, And so that visionary may be saying, well, I've gotta do this and I've gotta do that. Well, do you or somebody else have that accountability and you just need to let them have it? So often what you see in organizations and entrepreneurial organizations is the entrepreneurs, entrepreneurs here running the, the business, and they're selling the business, and they're down here and they're running the day-to-day operations of the business, and they're just running all over that accountability chart. And everybody's like, wait, who do I report to? Who am I accountable to? What am I accountable for if they're doing my job? And it creates this chaos. so we, we put that structure into place. It's one of the first things we do when we start to work with the leadership team is put that accountability chart. person is accountable for each thing within the organization. Doesn't mean they have to do it all. They're just accountable for making sure it gets done. Maybe they have a team under them that they delegate to. Maybe they have a consultant or they have an outsourced, you know, partner that they delegate to, or a vendor, but they're accountable in making sure that the sales and marketing happens, or that the, the operational component happens, whatever that is. And designing that visionary seat for the visionary. What are they best at? What do they do? Let them go do that. Because when they get down in here, create chaos, because they can't stay engaged long enough. And so we, we do that, and then we look at other tools that allow them to deal with the fires, So we, we have a process called, IDs, which is identify, discuss, and solve. And when your issues, your opportunities, your challenges pop up at you, how do you attack'em, how do you deal with'em? So you make'em go away for good. And we teach leadership teams how to identify your issue, discuss your issue, solve your issue. So it goes away forever, we give you that. So it's your firefighting tool, IDs is your firefighting tool. And so how do we help you do that? So it takes discipline, The tools and the concepts of EOS are simple. EOS is not, cuz it takes discipline and hard work. And you've just gotta be committed to running your business on, on a system, whether it's e o s or anything else, running on, on a system that's gonna provide you the structure, the discipline, the accountability that you need.

Peter Callahan: 41:02

Absolutely, yes. Discipline is one of my favorite words. I know it's a, can be an activating word for many folks, whether it reminds them of military or some family structure that they grew up in, or church or something else. But I love the term relaxed discipline. So instead of grasping our fist tightly, right, I must always stick to this plan. Or the opposite, just letting it go completely right? You open your fist, you open your hand, it all falls down. the way I think of it is, how do you hold. This intention, this plan gently with intention, but without gripping it too hard. Right? So just an open hand kind of holding things like, I'm caring for these things. Sometimes I need to move around. If I'm gripping on too tightly, I'm inflexible. and I like the word harmony over balance, but that balance is extremely hard to, achieve. And part of what you're talking about is changing our behavior, which in my experience is extremely challenging. And some of us seem to have a little bit more discipline, or when we can get clear on what our values are, I think, and really hold that in our heart. Remember, often enough to keep moving in a new direction, slowly but steadily. That's really helpful. But that's, that's really challenging And I'm wondering what you've seen or what, you might hope anyway to help anyone who's struggling with, you know, really starting this process of putting in the big rocks and slowing down enough. and trust, like trusting yourself, trusting the people who you might be delegating to. Holding people with caring. Accountability is a term I like. I've got your back. That's why I'm checking in. It's not to babysit cuz I don't trust you. It's the opposite's. Cause I care about you and I have your back. But all these messages are, if it's not the way we've been doing it, Ralph, it's, it's a lot for us to try and adjust to and adapt to.

Ralph Riccio: 42:46

It is. There's so many things there that you talked about that I'm like, I'm intrigued by No, no, it's good. when we talk about discipline, we talk about discipline, and you remember you used that word and instead of, but Right. Discipline and accountability, those two things go hand in hand. Right. And I, I, I love your analogy. It's not this hard fist discipline can have such a negative connotation. Issues can have a negative connotation, but it's not, you know, it's discipline and accountability issues and opportunities are available to you, right. In tackling those things, when we approach EOS with a, company, we start by working with a leadership team. So I work with leadership teams. I've got one company that's literally got. two owners and that's it. The two employees, right. I'm working with them and I've got, clients with 170 employees. work with the leadership team because I want them to learn it. want them to understand the tools and the disciplines of eos and then I want to get out of their way, But ultimately I'm trying to teach them about that accountability, how to hold each other accountable so they don't, the only ones who have rocks each quarter, but everybody in the organization ultimately would have rocks and there's places for them to be check in on those rocks on a weekly basis. Are we on track? Are we off track? Are we on track or off track? And how are they holding each other accountable? The change aspect is really difficult, Getting first that leadership team to all agree, yeah, we need this, number one. Number two, then getting them all to the place of saying, we're gonna commit the time to do this cuz it takes time. so I work in full session days with my clients and so we've gotta schedule out. Full session days. And when I start working with a client, we do three full session days, over 60 days, and that's really intentional. We start with day one, I teach'em a whole bunch of stuff and I send'em away with homework and go learn and practice and see how it feels. Try it on. And then we come back together about 30 days later and we check in on all that stuff, teach a bunch more stuff, and then come back another 30 days. It's not all at once, teaching them a semester's worth of work in one day. It's really spaced learning opportunity for them so they can go into their business, try it, come back, Hey, this worked, this didn't work. Help us a little bit more with that. Teach them some more things. Go back into your business. And so that's how you start to get that change to happen, Get them comfortable with it, the leadership team to the point where they start to teach it using the same language throughout. The company, so everybody's on the same page and it's about getting that vision all unified. So that leadership team is all on the same page about their vision. They can then sell it. Think about parenting, you're, you're how old? Your oldest now,

Peter Callahan: 45:25

Almost three.

Ralph Riccio: 45:27

almost three. So you're not quite there yet. You're gonna get to that point where, you know, you and your wife are saying, we gotta be on the same page when we're having the conversation. We gotta be delivering the same message. You're probably pretty close to that now, or else you're gonna confuse your, confuse your kids, right? If you don't have that same unifying message, same language, they're gonna be like, wait, what did I learn? What is this? And that's the same thing in a company trying to get that leadership team to be good parents and teach their kids or their employees.

Peter Callahan: 45:58

yes. That alignment that you're talking about.

Ralph Riccio: 46:00

alignment. Yeah. And it's what drives the discipline and accountability,

Peter Callahan: 46:04

Right, right

Ralph Riccio: 46:06

that discipline and accountability. So,

Peter Callahan: 46:07

And it takes enough space. I'm living your model of several days over a few month period so that there can be enough conversation, enough communication. This is what I often see as this rush, like, well, we have work to do. We're trying to. Build this plane while we fly it. And there are a lot of tasks to get done. So I'm sure there are many leaders who would hear, take a full day out of the business, say, absolutely not. I can't afford that. And part of my question becomes, what's the cost of not doing so? But I also wanna acknowledge, well, I've tried stuff like that before and it hasn't worked. So then how, I guess I'm wondering how you build that trust or even like what type of people, leaders you love to work with Ralph. Like what are some of the identifying, because I struggle with this to some degree too. I kind of say open-minded and open-hearted leaders, right? Those with a growth mindset that is very You know, maybe, maybe you self-identify that way, but it's not like those who are specifically in this manufacturing industry, in this size company, you know, I know you say small and medium companies, but what, like who do you really love to work? What have you identified so far?

Ralph Riccio: 47:14

I mean, I think we start with, you know, companies with 10 to 250 employees, but you heard me say I have company with two. and then, you know, we certainly work with companies that are far greater than that, up to the couple thousands really when, you know, design e os the sweet spot as those companies with 10 to 250 employees. for me it is about humbly confident leaders, confident, they're open-minded, they're willing to be open and vulnerable, not just with themselves, but with the people around them.

Peter Callahan: 47:46

Yes.

Ralph Riccio: 47:46

you know, sure you've read the book, the No Asshole Rule.

Peter Callahan: 47:50

Haven't, no, that one's new.

Ralph Riccio: 47:51

haven't, oh yeah. So, it's, it's essentially, you know, like humbly confident. Like, I want you to know, you know your stuff, you're good at what you do. team's good at what you do, but you know, there's something missing. You've gotta grow. met with a prospective client last week and, you know, third generation business. I met with the second and third generation. and, and the second generation, the dad who's running the business right now, he's been around a long time. He's been running this business since the, think seventies or eighties. I mean, he knows what he's doing, he knows the business. But the humble confidence in this guy was unbelievable. off the charts of just saying, know we're good at what we do, but I also know we've been doing it the same way for 25 years and it's not working for us anymore.

Peter Callahan: 48:36

Nice.

Ralph Riccio: 48:37

And we need this. And I, you know, I talked about accountability chart and structure, and he's like, we like, we need that. Like, everybody's running everywhere and he's doing everything and everything's in her head and we gotta get it out of like, I mean, they got, he just was so humbled to say, I don't know it all. And running the business the way I did 25, 30 years ago is not gonna get us to where we need to be. in 10 or 15 or 20 years from now. And that to me, it was, you are the kind of person I wanna work with. I've met owners and, operators of businesses and entrepreneurs, and I've thought isn't the right fit for me. Might be for one of my colleagues, but it's not the right fit for me. that's okay. that's that abundance mindset you talked about earlier. Right? I am not for everybody. I know that. I've, I've done my sales pitch to prospective clients. And they've ultimately decided to go with somebody else. And I celebrate that they found the right fit for them. That's awesome. Like, I love that they found the right fit for them and I will find the right fit company for me and vice versa. Right. And so, We get into this scarcity mindset of like, I need, I need, I need, and oh my God, another client. I gotta get another client. When I legitimately, believe as a coach are right for some people. You're not right for everybody. And, and have clients or, or prospective clients that you're like, geez, you're not the right fit. You're not what I'm looking. Right? It's that prosperous coach mentality, I think a little bit, If you've read that book, I mean, great, great book. and really abundance is like, there's, there's work out there for all of us.

Peter Callahan: 50:09

Amen. Amen. Exactly.

Ralph Riccio: 50:11

then I went down a rabbit hole there.

Peter Callahan: 50:13

No, that was beautiful. That was beautiful. I really love, as you were talking, I'm thinking of like abo, I just think of abundance as this love-based mindset and scarcity is a fear-based mindset, right? There's not enough. I'm not gonna have enough. I'm not enough versus. The humble confidence, which I first heard about from Adam Grant's recent book, think Again. So I've, I've loved this term, humble confidence, and to me, there's some degree of faith that goes in here. And this has been for me, this, the spirituality that sort of flowed out of my business reading that sort of led more into this mindfulness world and different ways of thinking about what really matters in life and why these, smart monkeys, messing around on this spinning rock hurdling through space, have grown this consciousness and why we're all making all these concepts up and doing all these things, so much of which is harming each other, you know, and just to acknowledge as to, you know, cis white males and the privilege that we're sort of operating within to some degree of awareness, but also, you know, ignorantly and blindly on some level. And,

Ralph Riccio: 51:17

Yeah.

Peter Callahan: 51:19

and yet we're all human beings, as you said before. And, To have this faith that the more I give an offer to others, not just ignorantly, right? It just constantly giving at all times, but to have a generous, abundant mindset, the data in my life, and see hearing from many others, shows that that pays massive dividends. And to me, that's one of the ways to build faith is almost to fake it till you make it to some degree. Like, all right, well, let me just see if I do some things for others, not just thinking about myself, see what comes back to me. And you know, this idea of karma is not often direct, So, oh, they didn't just send me a check after I helped them out, but

Ralph Riccio: 51:58

right, right. my wife calls it free for service. some days she's like, okay, not free for service. And it is, you know, one of our core values is help for city e os. when I thought about e os, when I was considering going on this journey this entrepreneurial journey with e o s, I mean, my core values like that, that help first core value was just bled through me. And again, if I go all the way back to my, my dad and my uncle and their business and my mom and, and how we were raised, it was that real true help first mentality. It was give back, help those people around you. my dad and his brother owned several buildings in the downtown Soton area when we were growing up. And, I could look back with, I don't wanna say dread, but I remember as a kid, five of us and my dad would pile in the country squire wagon. And with snow shovels and a and a snowy day. And we'd go downtown and we'd shovel the sidewalks of the store. And then my dad would say, keep going. Just keep going because you, you shoveled the neighbor's sidewalk. Whether you own that building or not, you just kept shoveling the sidewalks to help your neighbors. you dig out the little pathway so people can get to the crosswalk through the piles of snow. And that's what we did is you just, you helped, you gave, first we volunteered at church fairs and church events and, you know, all these different things and, and that bleeds into my work of help first, right? So when I do my sales pitch, I called it, right? It's really not that. I'm not going to sell you. I'm going to tell you about EOS and the tools and disciplines, whether you hire me or not. the tools, take the book. I'm leaving you with stuff. Here's the website. It's all free. you can go download all the tools and implement it yourself. And if you have questions, call me along the way. I'm happy to answer'em for you. It's just because I, you know, I'd rather you go on that journey on your own than not go at it, not go it at all, right? And go to Rough Cs and, and not be able to succeed. And so if I can help you do that, I'm gonna help you do that. There's another right client out there for me that's gonna fit well with me, and we're gonna move forward on the journey. So,

Peter Callahan: 54:02

Yes. And just having that energy, I feel like attracts the right people

Ralph Riccio: 54:07

Y

Peter Callahan: 54:08

to us.

Ralph Riccio: 54:09

Yeah. Well, I'm sure you can tell me a time that, that you, know, were more fearful than less fearful in your business. And you're like, wait, who shut the water? Tap off. Right? shut the tap of leads off? And then when you got some clarity and you took some deep breaths and you got back to that abundance mindset, the phone started ringing again. Right. you know, I think we all go through those ebbs and flows of our business and that, it's, it's just the reality of life, of being a human being. I'm, you know, as we go through the journey,

Peter Callahan: 54:40

Right? Having people to reach out to. And you know, for me, when I get into those dips often, I just wanna be working harder and getting more done. But the best thing can often be for me to go out into the woods and go for a walk or to go have coffee with somebody that, you know, I find inspiring. You were talking about sales. I love the idea that great sales is educating and inspiring, not convincing or manipulating.

Ralph Riccio: 55:03

Yeah. Yeah. It's funny, I was, you know, I was doing a little follow up this morning. And you know, somebody had reached out to me last week on LinkedIn like, Hey, I, my, my partners and I need you to come in. Like, we're, we need some help. And you know, I'd followed up with him. I followed up with me this morning and I was like, I wanted to say like, Hey, I'm not a used, a used car salesman. Which is funny cuz I bought a used car this weekend. But like, I'm not a used like, and I, and I hate to make paint that picture of used car sales cuz it was a great experience that I had. But like, I'm not a pushy salesperson. just literally want to help you and your partners get out of this place of feeling like you're pulling your hair out. I don't care if you hire me or not. Like, what can I do to help you? so hard to get that across sometimes and, and without feeling pushy and salesy. Right? And so it, it, but it is really, truly authentic of like, what can I do to help you? I want to help you get out of that space. And, and, you know, and, and some people might look at you and I as like, well, what do you two doing? Talking to each other? You might be competitors,

Peter Callahan: 56:03

right.

Ralph Riccio: 56:04

we're, we're here to support each other in our business. And I refer prospective clients to other EOS implementers because they are a better fit. They're, they're more right for them than I am. Their experience is different, right? Their personality might be a better fit. Whatever their background is, a better fit. I want that company to find the right person that they can work with. I might refer them to you. Maybe I just refer the CEO or the COO to you to work with on a one-to-one basis. We're not competitors. We're all here because we have a passion for helping these businesses grow these leaders grow in their work. And you know, however we can all work together to do that, I think is pretty awesome.

Peter Callahan: 56:45

Exactly, Ralph absolutely, absolutely reminds me of some. There's some research out there that, and I think of this as a facilitator. I've given a lot of workshops and done a lot of speaking and. Sometimes it feels like I nailed it and other times I'm pretty sure a few people fell asleep. And I've just read some research about, I think it was specifically around teachers and education, but this idea that some highly trained professional PhD gobs of experience can get up in front of group students, you know, kids, adults, and share something with again, all this experience behind them and it, when they, when they study that, versus a peer who's a few years into it, whose looks maybe the same or has been through a lot of the same experiences and goes up and shares that material with far less experience and maybe a little bit more clumsy. The, the impact, the actual takeaway and the ability for the people in the room to then apply what was shared goes through the roof with someone who's more relatable versus this amazing expert and not, not to say I've deeply value the elders in our community and. There's a balance in here, but I to your point, that relatability and going back to our theme of authenticity, being ourselves and relating as best we can in a real way, has a greater chance of making impact than razzle dazzle trying to impress. Let me show you my full cv.

Ralph Riccio: 58:09

Yeah. Yeah. It's funny, you know, I, years ago I gave a presentation. I was asked to do a presentation, to the entire staff of St. Jude. So there was about 1200 people

Peter Callahan: 58:19

That's fun. and I, I was like in panic mode and, and I was on stage with the chief information officer, the c e O, the c o o Chief marketing officer. I mean, like just the C-suite all across the board, Wow. And we, the night before we went and practiced, we had to do a, a practice, you know, dry I completely fumbled the whole thing. I completely messed up. And I was like, oh my God, like losing sleep that night. I, I've gotta do this massive presentation. The funny thing is, when we were backstage the next day, right before the anxiety in that space of all the chiefs who I looked up at, like, my God, these people are like, they're, they're so experienced. And they're they're so polished. They were human beings backstage. They were human beings who had the same anxiety and fear that I did. when they walked out onto that stage, they nailed it. And when I walked onto that stage, I nailed it, And backstage, we were all just the same. And guess what? On stage we were all the same as well. funny story to that, to that same year, there was a panel discussion later in the day on that same stage and being a total human being, you'll probably edit this out. one of the members of the C-Suite, I won't even call it their title, got up. During the, the, panel discussion walked off stage, and next thing you know, everyone's like, your microphone is on. He went to the bathroom and left lavalier mic on. That's more visceral than like covid on Zoom, going to the bathroom and flushing or something. That's that's, you're in the same building,

Ralph Riccio: 59:57

you're in the same building, 1200 people in the room.

Peter Callahan: 1:00:01

Wow.

Ralph Riccio: 1:00:01

and again, we're all human, right? He came back on stage, the c e o had a field night with it. laughed. And, you know, a very human moment. we, all screw up. We all make mistakes. we have to be humbled by that. I had experienced recently, and I won't go into detail, but it, like, it was a humbling experience. how I thought I was communicating, doing the right thing. perspective, right? The fresh perspective, somebody else's perspective didn't see the way I thought I was we have to. be forgiving in this world. And, and I think you've said it a little bit, that, you know, we we're not seeing a lot of that today. And, and so my piece, my part is like, how do I do that? How do I bring some of that love into the work that I do? And you do that. I that, that energy comes literally through the screen and, you know, and through our conversations when I met you over real estate, it came through. I mean, you're just a caring and compassionate, I guess you, you'd call yourself a recovering jerk, right. but you know, it, we need more of it in the world.

Peter Callahan: 1:01:01

absolutely. Ralph could not think of a more beautiful place to, to land the plane than right there. That's amazing. Thank you,

Ralph Riccio: 1:01:10

as I said, I didn't think we'd have any struggles finding, you know, a way to fill an hour of time For sure.

Peter Callahan: 1:01:15

Agreed. Is there anything else that you know you wanted to speak to that I didn't give you a chance today?

Ralph Riccio: 1:01:21

Your, the background I always keep but keeps popping into my head. So really short story, not too short, but when I was in sixth grade, my dad had an aneurysm on his brain. And, you know, lucky for us, he survived. But when my dad died, we did a, an a eulogy. We called it our two dads there was the dad before his aneurysm and there was the dad after his aneurysm, entrepreneur, entrepreneur. And what really showed though after the aneurysm was his passion and love for people. That's what got him up every single day to go to work when he was eventually able to. And he spent seven weeks in the hospital a coma for three of those weeks, like came home, didn't remember his, father had died. So every day he'd learn over and over again that his father had passed and we'd have to, you know, experience that loss and that grief day in and day out for, for quite some time. And, and he, you know, he couldn't take a nap cuz when he woke up he'd forget where he was. He didn't, you know, didn't. At one point he forgot he had kids. And so of emotional things that happened for us. But what always stands out for me, and I just felt like I had to share this, is that that passion for people is what drove him every day. Once he was able to go back to work at the store that he owned. His passion for seeing and being around people is what drove him day in and day out. And to the extent that when they, they closed the store, he found ways to volunteer in the community at the senior centers and, you know, playing cards or dancing with, with the residents at the care center, and going to stop and shop and just walking the aisles and talking to people and telling jokes. Cause his passion for people was so important. And I, I think that's what a big piece of what drives everything that I do, is that passion that I, I saw in him before aneurysm and after, but it really exploded after his aneurysm. So, so,.Anyway, that was the last thing.

Peter Callahan: 1:03:17

you.

Ralph Riccio: 1:03:18

into so I was like, let me just share

Peter Callahan: 1:03:20

I really appreciate it. Really appreciate it. Yeah, it's amazing to hear. It kind of reminds me of this theme that I bring up. A lot of every problem contains gifts and opportunities

Ralph Riccio: 1:03:32

Mm-hmm.

Peter Callahan: 1:03:33

something like an aneurysm. My dad had a t i a minor stroke at dinner with my brother out to dinner and just fell over on the floor and was filming at the mouth and like this, you know, unbelievably challenging situation. And similarly, I don't know if to the same degree, but I think it was a, a bit of a wake up moment, a perspective call, what really matters, what's important. And I know it impacted both of them a lot. And yeah. Thank you so much for, for sharing. It's amazing to hear. Yeah. Yeah. Still with us, still around.

Ralph Riccio: 1:04:04

Good.

Peter Callahan: 1:04:05

I've given him a couple grandkids.

Ralph Riccio: 1:04:07

Pretty happy about that.

Peter Callahan: 1:04:08

exactly, exactly.

Ralph Riccio: 1:04:09

Good. Awesome. awesome. I really appreciate the opportunity to, like I said, the conversation and and you know, learn more about you and sharing about e os and, you know, hopefully we'll do it again sometime.

Peter Callahan: 1:04:24

agreed. Agreed. Really appreciate it, Ralph. And I'll put, your contact information into the show notes as well, so anybody who wants to reach out is feeling inspired and, you know, would like to learn more. It'll be easy to track you down. And yeah, again, really grateful for your time this morning. Thanks for being with me.

Ralph Riccio: 1:04:39

I appreciate it. And when it's up and ready to go, I'll be sure. To share it out, so.

Peter Callahan: 1:04:42

Thank you. I really appreciate it. All right, take care, Ralph.

Ralph Riccio: 1:04:45

Peter. You too. I'll

Peter Callahan: 1:04:50

All right. One. Another big. Thank you to Ralph Ricky. for. For joining me for this conversation on the fresh perspectives podcast Podcast and thank you to each of you for being here with us If you enjoyed At It and found it useful I'd. i'd be so grateful if you'd be willing to take a moment to subscribe Offer. Offer any feedback? Feedback and shared With a friends If you think they might benefit From listening Thanks so much for your curiosity Wishing you courage and compassion You well,