Boujee Blondes
Boujee Blondes is presented by Melissa Clarke and Simone Grace.Join the ladies for girly chats full of fun and laughter - chatting about life, relationships and much more in a comfortable safe place. women empowerment and sisterhood is the sense of belonging that this podcast interprets. the atmosphere hopes to provide a safe place for everyone to go for advice whilst feeling accepted and understood. Melissa and Simone share their own life experiences which entails lots of blissful, loving and embarrassing moments but also mistakes throughout life. Speaking to diverse groups of people from different walks of life on various subjects. A weekly episode not to be missed - every Tuesday on all major podcast platforms. If you would like to contact the girls please email Boujeeblondespodcast@gmail.com
Boujee Blondes
Get to know Melissa!!
This episode explores the intertwined themes of anxiety, social media, and personal relationships while providing valuable insights on how to cultivate positive mental health and connection. We discuss the impacts of the fitness industry's portrayal on self-image and navigate the complexities of dating friends' exes.
• Discuss the struggles of January and its impact on mental health
• Share tips for overcoming anxiety through social connection and boundaries
• Explore the possible toxicity of the fitness industry
• Address feelings of regret and lessons learned from past choices
• Debate the role of "girl code" in relationships and personal happiness
• Introduce the product of the week: MAC Nudes as a nod to beauty trends
Make sure to follow us on Spotify and Apple Podcast!
you having kids?
Speaker 2:I'm not even answering that like but if you do suffer with anxiety on any sort of level, you're not helping yourself by staying on your own for a certain length of time that, like what I post on social media, is not one bit toxic yeah, there's an unfollow button, click cha-ching.
Speaker 1:I definitely would like the freedom. I'm not a person that like likes to be stuck in certain. It's the bougie blondes podcast with Melissa and Simone, available on Spotify, apple or wherever you get your podcasts. Now let's get bougie hi. I'm melissa hi. Our podcast is serving you, bestie vibes.
Speaker 2:We are just two country girls chatting about all things we struggle with daily life and of course, talking about certain issues some people are afraid to speak about.
Speaker 1:We give it to you real, while having crack along the way. Remember, these are just our opinions, gals, so don't take us too seriously. We're just giving you some best friend advice. Welcome, welcome. How is everyone? How are you, simone, today?
Speaker 2:I'm very well, thank you, and how are you?
Speaker 1:my girly world oh sure, look guys, I'm sick of January and I don't want to be one of those morning morning Michaels, but I just, I'm ready for now, just for things to lighten up a bit. Do you know what I mean? It's just.
Speaker 2:I feel January, though, is like the longest month of the year, and you know there's five weeks in this month. Like five weeks. Please tell me how, but it's long.
Speaker 1:And I feel like I don't know, like the weather has just been so bad in Ireland that I can understand why people emigrate, like it's just depression depression.
Speaker 2:Yeah, the weather really does affect your mindset.
Speaker 1:I always say it a hundred percent, like it just really does. But on the plus side, did you hear about all the planets that are aligning tonight?
Speaker 2:yes, I have my manifestation journal out ready to go.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I wonder, like will I be able to see anything?
Speaker 2:But see it's quite overcast now, so like they're actually going to be visible to see, but I don't think they're visible with the human eye, though I think you need, like, a telescope or binoculars.
Speaker 1:Or am I wrong? Well, I have my binoculars ready Simone and Robin Terry's binoculars.
Speaker 2:Of course you'd have them on hand. I'm gonna have to, like kareem box them to me, or something like that or buy them off a new one. They'll come in the next 15 minutes. People are going to be like. We all know what she's doing.
Speaker 1:She's looking up the planets tonight yeah, but I don't know if I'm actually unseen because it's so overcast. But look, let's say a prayer that we'll see all the planets align and it'll be a new reality. And because, to be honest, my reality for January has not been good. So we're just manifesting new vibes, we're staying positive, we're staying in a good mindset, so let's see if we see these planets.
Speaker 2:You know what it is. I'm not going to lie. Like even today I just one of the girls came up to me and she was like you're not yourself today. And I was like, am I not? And she was like no, because usually, like, I'm very, like, oh my god, like yay, it's a new day, like woo, let's rock, let's roll. But I was very in my feels today. Where are you? Very in my field. So I know I'm a woman and I'm just after coming off my period, so it could be that, but yeah, I mean, I woke up cunty today, so I just woke up in a cunt mood for no reason cunty cunty, cunty, fucking mondays.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you love it mondays, here we go rock and roll, baby. Yeah, it's good to be in the field, so sometimes it's human. You know what I mean?
Speaker 2:yeah, I know but the only thing is I push myself out of that negative little hole. Then, as well, I'm like no, you know what the day. So, basically, what happened? Right, I got up at the crack of dawn, I went to the gym and usually like, I have a shower in the gym and then I go to work. Like I got ready in the gym to go to work, I left my heels at home. So to come all the way home, I had a meeting at 10 am. I was 10 minutes late for the meeting. I was like, okay, today is not a good day to have a good day, y'all like. From then on, I was like everything was just backwards. I was like everything's going wrong and I feel like when one thing goes wrong in the morning. But then I'm like you know what? No, aren't toasting me babe.
Speaker 2:Yeah, exactly, I was like no, everything's actually going to go right for me now. Like everything's going to go right.
Speaker 1:Question though do you feel like, did your feet not get sore wearing heels every day? I think I'm so used to it now and like, how high would your heels be? Like on average are?
Speaker 2:they just like little heels. I, I don't. I wear stilettos every single day, do? You every day. Yeah, my feet don't get so. I think I'm just so used to them. But that's why I always say invest in, like, if you're working and have to wear high heels every day going to work, invest in a good like expensive pair because they come in super handy Me too.
Speaker 1:And would you wear like kind of? Would you have like the specific pair that you wear every day of? Would you have like the specific hair they wear every day? Or do you mix and match them?
Speaker 2:no, I mix and match because, like I go with my mood, like today I was feeling kind of neutral my dress had a bit of black in it, so it's like right, I'll add black heels to the mix okay what's your?
Speaker 1:favorite, then heels for work.
Speaker 2:I actually don't have a favorite heel for work, you know. No, like I just go with whatever I'm wearing. Yeah, like literally. But you know what? People always say that YSL heels are painful to walk in. I find them the comfiest little things on the planet, do you? Yeah, I would run a marathon in them heels stop it, I would absolutely. Yeah, my mamma's always liked me. Simone, you're going to get bunions. You are going to get like.
Speaker 1:Don't be manifesting that on me, like seriously if I wore YSL heels, like don't be manifesting that on me, like seriously, if I wore YSL heels where I live, it'll just be muck, like it's like I need to put myself into, like the countryside it's just with the rain, it's not a vibe yeah, but you know what girl?
Speaker 2:It's going to be summer soon. Spring is in the air and I'd only wish half the time that I had seasons, because there's only so much bikinis and so much dresses that you can actually wear that. You don't get like. You get bored of it and especially because of like, don't having like seasons on your grid on instagram. It's just given cozy girl era. It's given like spring girl era. I'm just summer aloha, all girl all year like I literally moana for for every year, like mona, mona simona, like I'm just always cozy girl vibes.
Speaker 1:I'm just like it's too cold, it's too mucky and it's raining well, look, we won't complain, because yeah we're alive, we're breathing. Exactly it could be worse, is my new statement. You know what I mean, even though it's like it's worse. The worst is here.
Speaker 1:Well, go on tell tell us what happened, because before we came on, the podcast guys, melissa messaged me and she was like this is not a good day, fuck my life the universe right has been testing me this month and either someone is after putting some like evil eye on me or voodoo doll, or I don't know what is going on, but Melissa is just laughing at it. I'm like whatever could be worse, like there's been multiple situations, but today now is one that's going to kick the bucket. So basically, at the moment I have a wooden plank at my front door because my door decided to cave in and I can't lock it.
Speaker 2:So no one robbed me no one you know what it's the weather? You had a storm.
Speaker 1:It's just hanging off the hinges I wouldn't, mind, it's actually a new fucking door. I'm like, oh, but anyway it is what it is and we just laugh at it'll be fixed.
Speaker 2:It could be worse, do you know it will, because your dad isn't going to come to the rescue cunty monday, cunty monday, cunty, fucking mondays.
Speaker 1:So we put out questions to for people to ask me topics and let's go through them so just bear in mind, this is all melissa's questions this week. Mine are next week first of all, what made you start it? So I presume it means the podcast, so it just happened didn't it?
Speaker 2:yeah, it actually did. Yeah, it did just happen. I moved here and we like obviously met at events and stuff like that and we just literally were yin and yang, like yeah, got on like a house on fire. And you messaged me one day and you were like I have an idea. And I was like tell me. And you were like let's do a podcast. And I was like absolutely I don't care if I'm on the other side of the world, we're doing it girl yeah, and that's it just started.
Speaker 1:So we had like a lot of um, technical difficulties at the start, because obviously it's more than Dubai. I was here and it's not like just your average people doing a podcast, walking into a studio and Bob's your uncle. No, there was a lot of hardship but we survived and we got through it. Yeah, and here we are still learning and growing and doing what we can you know what.
Speaker 2:I actually have never listened back to the first, I'd say about five or six episodes.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I wonder Because I know I'm going to cringe, I know I know I actually may listen back to it because, like I say, there is like a sense of stress in our voices. Yeah, it was like a whole new learning game, like I yeah, because obviously Simone is on was in Dubai, so like I had to try control all the gadgets here, the producing side of it, so like I don't know, I find I'm good like that I can push myself into pressure situations and just wing things like I'm. I'm really good at winging things.
Speaker 1:I don't know what it is, but if I prep for something, I nearly like overthink it and overstimulate yeah yeah, yeah, it's the same thing when I'm like live on radio, sometimes like I've prepped for radio, and then I'm now, I just kind of go in and just like read the vibe and the flow and just go with it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but you know what it is. It's a process, and the more you do something, the more it becomes kind of normal. It's not alien to you anymore. Yeah.
Speaker 1:So you kind of just ride the wave of it. Yeah, so that's how me and Simone met. So, yeah, okay, this is a good one. Things you do to cope with anxiety Hmm, okay, I don't really know Like I feel like sometimes I don't realize I. Maybe I'm like I wouldn't say like I suffer with anxiety. I wouldn't say I'm a person who suffers with anxiety. I wouldn't say I'm a person who suffers with anxiety, but I can become like overwhelmed. That will like give anxiety traits. I suppose so. And sometimes I don't think. Sometimes I feel like I don't feel like I have anxiety. I'm like no, I'm not stressed, but really my body tells me I'm stressed. So I think what I've started to do now is what I've learned is I've started to set more boundaries in place. I will do some meditations if I feel like I'm getting a bit anxious, and I've started to come off my phone, like some days I'll have like a social media free day. I feel like that helps with your anxiety a bit yeah, definitely 100.
Speaker 2:It does like things get overwhelming as it is, and then when you go on social media, just be like sometimes it can just take control over your brain a little bit, and not that we want to compare ourselves or anything like that, but sometimes we're human it just creeps in. Yeah, um and yeah, I think that's actually a really good one. To be fair, like I'm see, when I'm at work because I'm at work all day like yeah, I can go on my phone, obviously because I do social media marketing, but I don't tend to actually go on my Instagram that much. I find like if I'm at home on a Sunday and like I'm at home for like two hours before I go out and about, like I am on my phone and I feel like I can feel myself like getting edgy yeah, and I feel as well, simone.
Speaker 1:I feel like the more you isolate yourself, you become more anxious. Yeah absolutely like I feel like if you're sitting at home all day, like seven days a week, it's gonna affect your mood. Yeah, do you know, like and I get it that when you have anxiety it is hard to get out and about because everyone's anxiety is different, like every individual is a different case?
Speaker 1:um, like where I know some people struggle even to like leave the house and stuff yeah which I get, but then it nearly ends up making them worse, because I find myself, if I'm stuck at home like all day just sitting around not doing anything productive, I get like so unmotivated. Yeah, you get more unmotivated. Do you know what I mean? Rather than having a structure and a schedule and um, yeah, so like my main tips is meditation, boundaries, coming off your phone and just having like a fun day. Do you know what I mean? Like I think that is like really good to have, is like not think about work, not think about your phone, just have a coffee with a friend, go for a walk do you know what I mean? And just stay on social media.
Speaker 2:You do need to socialize, though, like yeah, you absolutely do, because I feel like sometimes you want to be left alone. I get it, but even if it's just going outside, going for a walk, like you're meeting people on your path, either way, yeah, someone is going to come about and say hi, how are you? I hope you're having a good day. That's what you tend to do if you're human, but I don't feel like if you do suffer with anxiety on any sort of level, you're not helping yourself by staying on your own for a certain length of time.
Speaker 1:You need to overcome your fear and like say no, this is actually all in my head, I can do it, yeah yeah, and it is that like those daily, like affirmations, and it's like you have control of the space in between your head. So your thoughts actually aren't your thoughts, so like, if you're getting thoughts when, like you're insecure or self-criticism, they're just thoughts that are not your thoughts yeah, do you know.
Speaker 1:So you have the power to take that back. And it is hard, believe me. There is times where you know there is situations and people, things that are overwhelming stressful situations. But I do think you have to push past the boundaries and put yourself out of your comfort zone and you will actually feel better by socializing and having a chat with someone as well. Do you know? I do think if you have anxiety as well, like chronic anxiety, like it is good to speak to someone about it, whether that's a doctor, therapist, a friend, because those little conversations help as well. Do you know?
Speaker 2:yeah, I think everyone suffers hard to kind of like yeah, to like loved ones or friends on that kind of level, because even though you're not depressed, anxiety is still some form of depression in a way, because it forms into that depression state of mind.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so, like once you start getting triggers don't get me wrong, everyone has some sort of anxiety. Yeah, so don't feel bad about feeling anxious about going to the gym or going out to meet someone, or like a day you wake up and you just feel a little bit on edge, like that happens the best of us. Yeah, but I do feel like you just have to control your own mind, your own emotions, and get up and say no, no, this is not happening today. I'm getting up and I'm living because that's what I'm here to do exactly and like as well.
Speaker 1:If it is like, if you are in a really bad state of anxiety, do you know? I mean I would advise, go speak to a gp and maybe, like you know, you might need like further magic medication and stuff. Do you know? I mean, because some people do have it really really bad, but I do think, as you said, it's like everyone does suffer anxiety a bit. Do you know what I mean? Like you wouldn't be normal if you didn't do you know what I?
Speaker 1:mean, yeah, that's my tips for anxiety. Okay, next up we have. Okay, this is an interesting one that I got. Do you feel the fitness industry is toxic, as I know you work out a lot? Do you feel it's damaging on your health and showcasing your journey on socials might make others insecure? Okay, so, first of all, yes, the fitness industry can be toxic, but it depends on who you're following, okay. Um, yes, I do work out a lot and I don't feel it's damaging to my health in any way whatsoever. If anything, I think it's the complete opposite. Um, personally, I think it's like important to respect your body and yeah, and put like proper nutrients and exercise in my cardiovascular system.
Speaker 1:you know having healthy muscles, so, yeah, I don't think it's damaging whatsoever.
Speaker 1:um, and then showcasing and showcasing your journey on social media might make others insecure, so, like I can't, I genuinely don't understand that, yeah, like I can't control what like my journey, how it's affecting other people, because I know deep down and I know for a fact that, like what I post on social media is not one bit toxic, that like what I post on social media is not one bit toxic. I think I come across very, very genuine and I say things how they are. Um, it's not like I'm promoting unhealthy, anything really toxic or unhealthy on my social media. So, like, I guess where maybe they're coming from, been like watching other like fitness people and stuff can make them insecure. But like, at the end of the day, you have to take responsibility, like and ask yourself well, why do I feel insecure by watching whoever it is on social media? Do you know what I mean? Um, unless that person on social media is actually actually coming out and been like hurting people and saying you're this, this and this, like that's out of their control, like do you agree?
Speaker 2:absolutely. I agree. Like I don't get that whatsoever. Like if somebody else's lifestyle and their life choices is making you insecure whether it's fitness, whether it's them just posting their day-to-day life if you feel some sort of like hate or insecurity towards that person, you need to take a deep look from within yourself. I think like it's because why are you feeling this way? Like a lot of people that are insecure about a situation is only they're only insecure because they wish that they had it, if that makes sense. So like when I look at someone, like I don't ever feel insecure. I actually look up to people. Yeah, so if I see your post, say, and it's like unbelievable, your body is rocking, it's giving bang in, I'm like, okay, well, I need to change my day-to-day routine. I need to get my ass up off the sofa, make myself feel better my mind, body and soul to know that I'm pushing myself to my limit, to where I want to be, because everyone is on a different journey in life. Exactly and.
Speaker 2:I always say it everybody is on a different journey. It doesn't matter what journey it is, but everyone has a path that they choose to take and you need to follow your own process, your own journey, and that's why I just don't and especially with, like the fitness industry I don't understand why someone would put hate on somebody else that's trying to improve their day-to-day life.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like their habits, like that kind of. That kind of annoyed me a bit. Like you're, like I don't like if someone is getting up, right, yes, I do work out five times a week and I'm starting back my into my run for my half marathon, but like, why would you look at someone and being like, turn that like, turn that perspective into like a bad?
Speaker 1:thing yeah yeah, like I, just I, I people's minds like boggle me sometimes, how everyone's perspective is different. Like it's not like I'm coming on, but like, oh, you should be doing this, it's my journey. Like I'm trying to obviously like inspire people by giving them like tips, nutrition tips, do you mean? Like, if you don't want that, that's fine, just don't look at it.
Speaker 1:Follow button yeah, do you know? Click cha-ching, do you know? But I just people just have to like, turn such positive things into like negative things. Do you know what I mean? Like I don't know. But anyway, I enjoy my workouts and I want to be fit and healthy as like an old woman, so that's exactly why I'm doing it.
Speaker 1:I want to be able to get up and down off the toilet when I'm 90 and not have a bad back Right. Next one Do you regret any decisions in your life? Next one do you regret any decisions in your life? Um, like I don't know, like do I, like I'm sure everyone like regrets a few things, but like I feel like those decisions make us who we are today? Um, the only thing I probably would regret is not not working on things maybe a bit quicker and having, like not having the confidence to do things. Maybe earlier in life I think it took me longer to get the confidence and self-esteem. Um, but then again, everyone has a journey, don't they?
Speaker 2:like I feel like exactly, and I do feel like confidence comes with age. Yeah, and I even remember my granny saying this to me, like she was like when you get to a certain age, you actually don't care what anyone else thinks. Yeah, so live your life the way you want to live it, because you only get one life and people are going to talk no matter what you do. So it's like you, you're like us, or whatever it may be. You're in the gym. People are judging you. You're out seven days of the week. People are calling you an alcoholic. Get yourself to the gym. You're going on 20 holidays of the year oh, she has notions. You don't leave your house oh, she's depressing. Like you cannot, honestly, god.
Speaker 2:So yeah don't let anyone else's, and you know what. It's only when you come to a certain age, because when I was a teenager as well, like I, so insecure, I was in a little shell, like I didn't have the confidence, hate to put my hand up in the classroom and if only you could turn back. But it makes you who you are today and, yeah, it's a journey. So, like, as you get older as well, like you look back in like five years time or two years time, being like, oh, I wish I'd done that sooner. I wish I'd done that sooner, but everything happens at the correct timing yeah, a hundred percent.
Speaker 1:And it is that, like, no matter what people do, as you said, if if someone's not into socializing or going out drinking, or they're depressed or why don't they drink? Or sure they're boring then if they do drink or drinking too much, they're in the gym or they're obsessed with themselves, like what you said, like you can never win.
Speaker 1:So never, yes, that's my only regret, like it's not having the confidence, but then it is what it is. Things are what they are, aren't they? Like? There's a reason for everything.
Speaker 1:And next up, would you recommend starting in the beauty or makeup industry? Okay, so yes, if you have a passion for it, I would 100 start. But if you're doing it for it, I would 100% start. But if you're doing it for the money, I would say no, 100%, like it is a very hard industry to break and it is a very hard industry to make a name for yourself and to make money for the first good couple of years. And even at that's you're dependent on the economy, of what way your business is going to look that year. So if you, if you are someone who is not strong-minded, especially if you're self-employed, if you're someone who's not strong-minded, determined, I wouldn't do it personally. But if you are someone who likes a bit of a challenge and kind of likes the like, the flexibility and lack of assurance, then go for it. But it is a very rewarding industry of like if you're a creative being, you're getting to meet people and yeah, but again, I think it depends on your character. But it's definitely not for the money unless you work really hard and work your way up right.
Speaker 1:So next one, simone, someone has. What's your favorite type of takeaway? I do love an otaku chip what's yours.
Speaker 2:I put my hands up and say I have proper IBS, so anything that has grease on it, I would suffer for months. So I haven't had a proper takeaway. I got a Chinese when I was at home and I love a prawn stir fry from the Chinese, like prawns and black bean sauce, and it was unbelievable, like so nice and I just was like why did I do that to myself? Like it's torture, it's actual torture. But I'm more of a dessert person me, are you? Okay, I'm like I prefer, like my mouth is even watering now.
Speaker 1:But if I'm going out for dinner I look at the dessert menu before I'd look at like the starter or the main no, I, I would be like definitely more of a like savory, yeah, like I love crisps and dips and peanuts and like yeah, things like that, but taco chip are probably my go-to if I was having a chipper yeah, I do love a chinese chip was nice yeah, I do love a chinese, but I always feel so sick after, like what you said. Like yeah, bubbling you know I think it's just all day.
Speaker 1:I don't know what's in it, but yeah, we'll go for it. Everyone feels sick after a takeaway though. You don't know what's in it, but yeah, we'll go for a tap water.
Speaker 2:I feel like everyone feels sick after a takeaway.
Speaker 1:Though you don't feel healthy, I feel like it's crawling out of my skin or something yeah, I feel like even the smell of the chippers has been your like skin and hair and clothes, like it's like in beds. It's your soul, doesn't it? It's like you need a shower after. It's like, especially when you walk into Abra and Carlo I'm not messing right like I'd be, like I'm not walking in there because my clothes are gonna smell like you come out like you need a shower, like it's like just oil everywhere. It's giving oil, it's giving oil. Okay, next time would you like to live abroad? Yes, I'm, yes, I know like I'd like a bit of both, like I don't know if that makes sense. I would like to live abroad, maybe for a while, um, but I think I'd like definitely to settle down back in Ireland. Does that make sense?
Speaker 2:yeah, I get that, though, like a lot of people, everyone is different. Like all my life I thought I was a home bird. Everyone's like she's never going to move away. She's so close to their family, like from a small town, and now I'm like, how do I settle back in? Like I love my family, love my friends, and I'm like when I go home I'm like can I actually see myself living here again? I love Ireland. I love home.
Speaker 2:Home is always home yeah but I'm like how do I settle back into? Don't you get so used to living yeah, living, yeah, differently like I'm like I definitely are you having kids?
Speaker 1:I'm not even answering that like I don't know. I definitely would consider moving. I don't know. I feel like I would thrive better somewhere else. If that makes sense, yeah, do you think you might give it a go.
Speaker 1:I don't know it's such a hard time because obviously at the moment, I'm like, right, do I start the house now, which was meant to be started like five years ago, but like keep putting off and off and I'm like, is there a reason why I keep putting off? Yeah, do you know what I mean? I get that. Is it like I don't want to like be stuck, because once I do it, I'm stuck.
Speaker 2:The advice I would give is that, like everyone feels that way like when I was about to get up and go, I was like is this the right thing for me? It's never really the right time, but if your thought is telling you something, then even if you try it for a month or two months, see how it goes, at least then you know you tried it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know that I definitely would like the freedom. I'm not a person that like likes to be stuck in certain areas. You know I like the mix, so I don't know. I would like to yeah, like I definitely would like to more traveling this year. Um, yeah, so look, we'll see who knows, okay? Next question right, I'm just like are you having kids? I'm not even answering that like, because I just think it's a very personal question yeah, I'm just like.
Speaker 1:First of all, you shouldn't ask any woman are they having kids? Number one you don't know if they want them or not. Number two you don't know if they're trying to have them and they can't have them. And number four you just don't know people's situation, so no comment. And I'm like what's it got to do with people? Anyway, like why is it such a concern, why women are or people are so interested in women are having kids? You know what?
Speaker 2:there's so much pressure. I do think, though, when you get to an age that is like when you're settling down, how come you're single, how come she's married and she doesn't have a kid yet? How come, like I said already, people are going to judge. It's not the right time. When it'll happen, and when a baby pops out of me, then you'll know hun, exactly like when you see me bye felicia, bye felicia.
Speaker 1:What's like that? Even when women have like their first child, they're like, so when you're having your second and you're like, yeah, like yeah, I'm like, oh, I don't know. No comment, won't be answering it, none of people's business, okay. Next one is what's your go-to style? I definitely think I'm like, uh, I jump between styles, like I'm girly, girly, but then I'm also a bit grunge as well, like I do love like the old, like baggy jeans and like little crop tops, kind of very like that, kind of like 90s girl band vibe. Yeah, yeah, but then I'm girly but then I'm grungy at the same time as well, so I'm a bit like in the mix, it's nice to mix it up a bit like it's boring when you're just kind of yeah the same.
Speaker 2:Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 1:yeah, I'm a bit oversized spice it up a little now and again sometimes I do like I'm just like, yeah, I feel like I dress like a rapper, sometimes like a big oversized hoodies and like massive tracksuits. I'm like, yeah, I think I'm like a bit of a mix. Yeah, pick and mix, a pick, a mix. Yeah, okay, well, that's all the time we have questions for today, but, like, thank you to everyone who sent them in, um, and we'll go on to our dilemma yeah yep, just breathe.
Speaker 1:Melissa and simone are here to listen. So, on our dilemma today, this, this is a spicy one. Okay, I really like this boy, but it's my friend's ex here. Here is some context of the history. We have two friend groups. A certain few people are in both groups, so on nights out we generally always meet up.
Speaker 1:My friend was with this guy when we were teenagers nine years ago. She cheated on him and they broke up. It wasn't a long-term, serious relationship. We were all kids and immature. We are all now between 25 to 32. Now Over Christmas we have all been out together and I have been chatting to her ex. He's in the other friend group. We have been getting on very well and we have been flirting a bit and I feel a good, strong connection. We have been messaging on Instagram with the usual replying to stories and sending memes, and he asked me to go for dinner and a drink. I was really looking forward to it, but when I mentioned it to my friend, the childhood ex, she got really cold and rude to me, saying girl code is not to date an ex. I get girl code if the relationship was recent or in a more serious matter, but they were 16 and it was a two-month relationship that things are okay between them now. Should I listen to my friend and respect her wishes, or follow my heart? Oh, that is tricky.
Speaker 1:That is tricky, isn't it?
Speaker 2:I will put my hand up and say, though, an ex is an ex for a reason, and when you're 16 and if it's two months, it's kind of like that doesn't count as an ex.
Speaker 1:no, no I don't think it does either a teenage situationship like a flame.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that, yeah, like you just kind of went with it because you were a teenager. Yeah, you know what I mean. And plus the fact she cheated on him and that's what ended it like it wasn't even that she was left heartbroken yeah, and again there were kids.
Speaker 1:Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 2:like there's 60 babies, like yeah, like I mean I would sit down and have a chat with her and just say, look, it's actually not that deep. Like, just explain it all to her. We get along like. Does she say that her friend is in a relationship now, or no?
Speaker 1:no, she didn't say that, oh no but like even like I don't know, even till I get a bit like ratty about it right, yeah, is she. Even if you sit her down, is she even going to be like take? She even change her perspective on it. Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 1:like I get it if they were like together for a year or two, maybe 100% yeah, yeah like that is a bit like huh or Simone, even if they were like, even if they were, say, like older, like, even if the relationship was in like their middle 20s and then they were now in their middle 30s, I would say, okay, that could even be like a no-go area because they were teenagers. I feel like it was just like more little cutesy little, like you know, like you have a little boyfriend kind of relationship like do you know what I mean.
Speaker 2:Just kind of like finding yourself, yeah, like you're not really, like you don't even know what love is when you're 16. Yeah, it's lost. It's not real. I'm sorry, it is not real no unless, like, you're 16 meeting the guy and you're married at 30 like and you're together for that like, that's lost but that's because you just grew up together, though it's not like two months at 16. God's sake, have a day off. No, you actually do need to tell her she needs to have a day off.
Speaker 2:No, you actually don't need to tell her she needs to have a day off, because I feel like she's been very spiteful she's been a bit of a like a little spoiled brat, I feel I don't think so, and you know what some girls are like that, like they can literally go around and be with every man and they'll still come back to you and there won't be any man left for you and say, no, you're not going. Yeah, because they just don't want you to be happy.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like you said if she was waiting from like 16 to like fucking 19 or 20, we're like no, it's like a proper four-year relationship, you know. I mean they kind of grew and evolved together, but something that was like 16 for like two months, I wouldn't even really count that like no relationship but if it were me and like one of my friends approached me and and said that like I'd be.
Speaker 2:Like you know what? I'm older, I'm more mature. Like I have a different mindset, go for it Like we were kids. Just once you're happy and if you get along, I'm not going to put my foot in the way of that. Like I'd rather see my friend happy than like be miserable.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no, I definitely think you should go for it, especially, you know, if you feel like you have a connection and these are getting on. I would just say to the friends look, you know, I feel really strongly about him and I'm just gonna go ahead with it. I hope, like you know, you can understand, like, and leave it at that. Like you know, like I don't, I don't see how she could think that she's wrong. Like, like what you said, like, would you not want your friend to be happy, especially if it was just you know something like I'm so minor, like do you know, what I mean.
Speaker 1:But yeah, let us know how you get on. I'd be interested to see where this fun.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I need like a repeat of this in next week's episode to know what he said yeah, and let us know.
Speaker 1:Like, do you think that our listener is right or wrong? Like should she go for the new man or should she respect her friend's wishes? We want to know what you think. Yeah, okay, let us know. So, for our product of the week we have we are reintroduce, reintroducing the 90s lips, so we have the new mac nudes are back. Have you tried the mac nudes? That's a fresh pot. Yes, the lipstick remember that used to be years ago, yeah, yeah. So the mac news. So the night. Yeah, the 90s lips are back. So we have the dark brown lip liner. So stripped down lip liner. That's always been um sold. But, yeah, the new mac nudes. So we have 90s lips are back. And you know, anyway, I'm a massive fan of mac anyway, so follow through the week.
Speaker 2:It's close 6 are the go. I don't care. They honestly are the goat, yeah, like they are.
Speaker 1:I'm obsessed, I'm just a mac lover, so they were obviously going to come on to product of the week at some, on some stage. You know what I mean. But yeah, that is my little product of the week and try it out, because it's not for everyone. The fresh pop, because it's quite. It is quite like it's nude news, like you know. I mean it's nearly like lipstick on the or foundation on the lips, intense, that's what I mean.
Speaker 2:Yeah it's very like when I was younger and used to put essence dream mousse black hair with a side fringe, back combed and no lips.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so that is what it's very like destiny's child girl band 2000, late 90s, 2000 era. I fucking love it like.
Speaker 2:I feel like it's gonna come back, though you know I do like fashion, trends come and go every couple of years, and I feel like it's coming back yeah.
Speaker 1:So get your hand on the mac flesh pot. Let us know what you think. It's not for everyone, but I give it a big thumbs up. So, yes, so for this week's weekly affirmation we have. My journey, with its ups and downs, is a testament to the depth of love I have for myself.
Speaker 2:I love that.
Speaker 1:Yeah. I love it. So thank you for tuning in to this week's episode. We had lots of dilemmasas, catch-ups for the week and, yeah, hope you's enjoyed and make sure you follow us on spotify, our apple podcast and on our instagram as well.
Speaker 2:And we'll chat to you next week, where I'll be answering my questions, so get them in for me to answer yes, send Simone some juicy ones now some dirty ones oh god, above of course I got some like weird ones, like as well.
Speaker 1:We just can't even read them out because I'm just like stopping to creep, do you?
Speaker 2:know what I mean yeah, of course, like they don't even deserve to get gas. Yeah, they don't even deserve to get yeah, they don't even deserve to get like air if I do get juicy ones like that, though, I'm just gonna like I'm full of my fun, I am, so I'm just gonna come out and say it on this, I'm just like go on, go for it tell me what you wanna hear. You might not get an answer, but we'll read them out.
Speaker 1:Anyway, we'll see you next week, guys. Thanks for tuning in, bye.
