Boujee Blondes
Boujee Blondes is presented by Melissa Clarke and Simone Grace.Join the ladies for girly chats full of fun and laughter - chatting about life, relationships and much more in a comfortable safe place. women empowerment and sisterhood is the sense of belonging that this podcast interprets. the atmosphere hopes to provide a safe place for everyone to go for advice whilst feeling accepted and understood. Melissa and Simone share their own life experiences which entails lots of blissful, loving and embarrassing moments but also mistakes throughout life. Speaking to diverse groups of people from different walks of life on various subjects. A weekly episode not to be missed - every Tuesday on all major podcast platforms. If you would like to contact the girls please email Boujeeblondespodcast@gmail.com
Boujee Blondes
Engaged to a Cheater? Exploring Relationship Dilemmas and Women’s Safety in Ireland
Melissa and Simone deliver best friend advice on gym wear debates, relationship red flags, and the concerning state of women's safety with their signature blend of honesty and humor.
• Simone recaps her rejuvenating Thailand vacation with crystal clear waters and friendly locals
• The hosts discuss the "generational gym wear wars" between Gen Z's baggy preference and millennials' fitted styles
• They offer advice to a listener who learned French to surprise her fiancé only to overhear him confessing to cheating
• Both hosts emphasize knowing your worth and not proceeding with a relationship when trust is broken
• Melissa and Simone share personal stories about being followed and harassed
• They discuss the importance of women's safety and practical tips for staying vigilant
• Women shouldn't blame themselves for the inappropriate behavior of others
• The hosts recommend MAC's new strobe blushes as their product of the week
• Final affirmation: "This is hard, but I can do it. I will let go of what does not positively serve me"
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It's the Bougie Blondes podcast, Melissa and Simone, available on Spotify, Apple or wherever you get your podcasts. Now let's get bougie. Hi, I'm Melissa. Hi, I'm Simone. Our podcast is serving you, bestie vibes.
Speaker 2:We are just two country girls chatting about all things we struggle with daily life.
Speaker 1:And, of course, talking about certain issues that some people are afraid to speak about. We give it to you real, while having crack along the way. Remember, these are just our opinions, gals, don't take us too seriously. We're just giving you some best friend advice. Welcome back to the Bougie Blondes podcast. Everyone, I hope you're well and we're very excited to bring you this fun-filled episode. Simone has been very busy. The last couple of weeks she has been in Thailand living her best life. Fill us in.
Speaker 2:I'm trying to live my best life, but I'm so happy to be back on the podcast. We had a little roller coaster. Melissa was sick, um, but she's back to herself again.
Speaker 1:Yes, just exactly where we need her to be. I felt um a bit weird not doing the podcast the last couple of weeks yeah, yeah it's.
Speaker 2:It's mad how something goes so out of your routine and you just feel like you don't know whether you're here or there like what exactly is going on?
Speaker 1:unless they're little chats, or monday evening chats after work I feel like we've, I've been just like purging like sickness out of every part of my body, like physically, emotionally, physically, emotionally, mentally urge you know what they say, that your body goes through this because you're like going into another level of your life you're getting rid of all the toxins in your body, all the toxic people in my life. You're evolving, you're evolving, I'm evolving. Well, I hope that's the Simone.
Speaker 2:I really do it's a great way to look at it yeah, I like positivity fill us in. On Thailand, it looks so nice oh my god, it was amazing, but I would recommend going more than a week because a week is just not enough.
Speaker 2:Like it's a whole different world there, like it's beautiful, like the water is crystal clear and everyone is just so friendly and such a little vibe. Unfortunately ellie was a little bit ill so we didn't party much. It was a very like rejuvenating holiday like. I think we drank one night and on the first like, but you know what? We drank was only like three drinks with our dinner I do.
Speaker 1:You know what I'm. I'm here for that, though I'm. I just think that sometimes you need those holidays where you actually just like enjoy it and not be hungover, do you know? Yeah, a hundred percent yeah, I needed it.
Speaker 2:I needed the little vacay, the vacay, beautiful. But then I came back and I was like I need a fucking another holiday. I'm too stressed.
Speaker 1:I just need another holiday. Um, so I've seen this thing right. Um, it's generational gym wear wars okay, where it's baggy versus fitted. So apparently it's the gen z generation are kind of having a debate against the millenniums about how they're embracing. The gen z generation are embracing baggier, more comfortable workout attire and they're moving away from the ultra fitted outfits that millenniums wear, and so the shift for the gen z's is like an integrating their preference for integrating fitness seamlessly into daily life, prioritizing comfort over polished looks. What's your thoughts?
Speaker 2:well, I mean to be fair, right, I always say whatever. Somebody feels more comfortable going to the gym and let them just do their, do their thing. Like I never, ever understood why someone needs to comment on somebody what they're wearing, whether it's to the gym or whether it's a night out, like, yeah, it's, it's your own business, like what you wear to the gym, and I feel like when someone has worked so hard on their body and if they want to show off a little bit of flesh in the gym, it tends to motivate other people little do people?
Speaker 2:realize like if I'm in the gym and I see a girl in a nice crop top and she's toned and she has like fitted leggings on and the ass is given, I'm like slay, this is what I want. Yeah, you know what I mean. But if you want to cover up, you want to cover up like it's completely up to you. I like I actually genuinely don't have like an opinion on it. If I'm being honest, here.
Speaker 1:Do I? I actually tiktok on this today, not on this actual topic, but it was a man giving out basically saying that women are wearing too little to the gym and pissed me off because I still feel like we live in this world where males just try to control everything that women do. Do you know what I mean and like what? As you said it's, it's none of your business if not like.
Speaker 2:I feel like when it's coming from a man's perspective, it's kind of like, yeah, he's going to the gym, he's training, but then he's caught off guard because he's looking at his surroundings like, and maybe he's running off of his workout, whatever, but just block it out. You know what I?
Speaker 1:mean like no, I mean, or I've actually recently started like I don't know how it came about, but I have. I've started to like um, we're like, especially now, if I'm doing upper body, I will wear like baggy fat man pants, the gym and a crop top, and I don't know why I started doing that, but I think it was a thing where it was like I was a bit chilly, yeah, and it was like winter and I was like, hmm, and now I kind of like that kind of look as well, but then I like fitted looks as well. So like I like both. Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 2:like yeah, but I know like, if you're feeling good going to the gym and this is why women are so into getting nice, fitted, fit fitness clothes yeah, it's because you feel good while you work out. Yeah, it's all down to your mindset. Yeah, do you know what I mean? That's like us turning around being like why is a man wearing a tank top top to the gym? Yeah, like, why is he wearing the tank top? Put a t-shirt on. Why are you showing your shoulders? We don't need to see them. Put it away. No, we don't, because we actually couldn't care less they couldn't give a shite.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I just think if you're, if you're so invested in what other people are wearing to the gym, you're not working out hard enough. Because when I'm in the gym yeah, fair enough, you might be standing around, like I feel like even between sets, when I'm standing around, I'm looking, but I'm not looking. Does that make sense? I'm in my own world, like I'm just like you know, I have to do another set now. I have to do this when I go home, like I'm not really interested in other people there, so like I just I don't know, it makes no sense no, it doesn't like.
Speaker 2:I've never, ever like, looked around in the gym. My head is down because I'm actually paranoid to the fact of if I make eye contact with someone, or if someone's looking at me, I'm just like I want to leave yeah, yeah, that's it like.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, baggy versus fitted, we want to know. I don't really see many people wearing, though, like baggy clothes to the gym, so maybe it is like this new trend that we're going to see coming in, like the people are wearing more baggier clothes to the gym, like we're kind of like flares, you know, like the yoga chair, like trousers.
Speaker 2:Yeah, they're still fit yeah, I like them.
Speaker 1:But you know what annoys me with them if I'm doing any like using machines, like leg press or anything, because they just like fall down.
Speaker 2:Yeah, don't they yeah, they really do. So it's like more of like if you're doing upper body, as you say.
Speaker 1:It is, yeah, it is. It's like upper body attire. So yeah, let us know whether you are a baggy or a fitted girl in the gym. Just breathe. Melissa and Simone are here to listen just breathe.
Speaker 2:Melissa and simone are here to listen. So on this week's juicy dodgers dilemma, we have hello girls out of topic. I recently learned french language to surprise my fiancee on our wedding to our vows. That's actually really cute. That's really cute, isn't? Yeah, yeah? But to my surprise, I heard him talking in French to one of his friends. Little did he not know that. I could understand. I heard him telling his friend that he has he is sleep. He is sleeping with another girl and he didn't use any protection, which they enjoyed it.
Speaker 2:It's true that your man's friend is not your friend. And from that moment, my heart stopped beating and I even didn't eat anything because I am thinking what went wrong, girls? I don't know what to do. It's all, it's all planned and we even have all the things that we need to proceed. And now I'm having anxiety to tell this to my family because I already have have trauma before and I don't know what and I don't know what it is. What is the reason why he needs to sleep with another girl if we're already getting married and I already gave him all the best? Please help my shivers.
Speaker 1:I actually have shivers. Reading that I feel like crying I don't know.
Speaker 2:That is actually really, really sad, like I'm so sad above and beyond because obviously he's french.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean oh, I don't even know what to say. Like no, it's actually. I actually feel really sad about that. Like I don't know, it's after hitting deep. I just I don't know what that's. I just think if someone cheats, it's a no-no yeah definitely like I get it.
Speaker 2:Like if he cheated and he was feeling like guilty about it and if he was speaking in French, saying like oh my God, what do I actually do? Like I'm sat with her here at this table amongst her friends, like my heart can't deal with this. Like how do I go about it? But he's explaining to his friend that he enjoyed it and that he slept for another one.
Speaker 1:like yeah, it's like there's no remorse? None at all, it was like a casual conversation, which makes me concerned. Is this the first time, you know? Like I'd say something if he came to her and said this after happening after sleeping with another girl I don't know how it happened, I was drunk, blah blah, maybe another scenario with her and then if she had the choice then of been like, I don't know, I just feel like with that situation it could be a lot different. This seems more sneaky and calculated, do you know?
Speaker 2:Well, in my opinion, I'd just drop him, like your mental health is more important to what your family and your friends think.
Speaker 1:Just for a ceremony, it's one day day a ring on your finger like it's not worth it. Because I just feel that if you go into a lifelong commitment with someone and you already know this, and what are you going to do? Just ignore it like you're going to, oh, it didn't happen? What's going to happen is you're going to go into your marriage, whether it's six months down the line, a year or two years in line. You're going to think about this and either you'll start to question him on it and then you might get a yes or no out of him. He might never admit it. He might will admit it, but what are you going to do then? Do you know what I mean? Like I don't. I just, by reading her message, I feel like she's more concerned about what other people will think rather than her own happiness this is the thing and I feel like a lot of women like are the same, like I know myself like it.
Speaker 2:It's it's very hard to like confront your family and friends about these things, like it's not easy. No, it's not relationships, they've built relationships. But, like Melissa said, if you showed some remorse about it, um, but I think you should just come out and tell them look, I'm after going out on my way to learn French and I've heard everything that you said at that dinner table and it can't go ahead and as much as it's going to kill you and eat you up inside, you need to step away from that because you're worth more than that 100. You're worth more than that relationship, marriage, whatever it may be like. I always say, if he doesn't worship the ground that you walk on. Yeah, he's not the one. He's clearly not ready to get married anyway, he's not ready for a commitment. No at all.
Speaker 1:Like I don't know. I just I think you're 100% right and I feel like, as women we do, sometimes we don't realize how valuable we are and we don't realize our worth and like I feel like it is so important to like, as a woman, really understand how you should be treated you know what I mean and honor that and stand up for yourself, and if that means walking away, that is exactly what you have to do yeah um, I don't know, he's kind of like giving me I can have it all vibes and I just don't like it isn't he, yeah, definitely, and unfortunately it is an ego thing with men is it is this, like I know this is stereotyping, but is it like a French thing for men, like I do see it in the movies, right so like I feel like French men just like love sleeping with people?
Speaker 1:Yeah, they actually do. And people come to me if I am stereotyping, if you are a French man. If you are a French, If you are a French, please come to me. But like it is how they like, I don't know. I feel like they just love sex.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, they do. It is kind of known to be fair. But yeah, yeah, I don't know we're going further into it. I feel like we're just, oh, I don't know, I, my heart is aching, for I'm not gonna like like it's actually aching, because it's the worst feeling in the entire world because obviously right now she feels like shit.
Speaker 1:Her anxiety is up. She's caught in this dilemma where she's like do I keep it to myself? Do I say it to someone? I feel that she wants to say it to someone, but she knows that once she says it to people, they're going to tell her what to do and I feel like maybe she's not ready to hear that yet. Maybe she just needs a little bit of time to process it yeah, she probably wants to hear from an outsider's perspective as well yeah, do you know?
Speaker 1:which is okay. It take as long as you need to process it, but I don't know. I just feel that if he's going to do that to you now and if he's going to be speaking about it to other people, in French, especially his friend, like yeah, it's just someone.
Speaker 2:I personally, if somebody, if one of my friends, come to me and you're seeing someone with that amount of time that you're getting married, I'd be like what are you doing? No, you need to tell her. Or? I'm telling her yeah, like a hundred percent.
Speaker 1:I think that's a boy thing, though is that, I think, like girl? I think if it was like girls, we'd be like you need to like break up with him, but I think boys are just kind of like. Oh okay, you know, I don't know. I just what's concerning me is how he's like speaking about to the other person as if, like it's a general conversation. It's not even like something that he's trying to like keep to himself, which makes me feel, by him doing that, it's like an ongoing. Yeah, I think it's ongoing. He doesn't give a fuck. To be honest, do you know? I think he loves her, but probably wants his cake and eat it as well.
Speaker 2:Yeah, 100% fucking French men, fuck me well, look girl, just remember, know your worth. Yeah, you deserve so much more than that so much more let him go yeah, just let him go.
Speaker 1:The universe will align you in the right direction. Yes, it always does. Yeah, so even if it goes shit up, it will direct you to the one that you need in your life. So, yeah, if you have any dilemmas or funny stories, please send them into us at the bougie blondes podcast at gmailcom. We have seen a lot across line about I know this is kind of going on for a while, but about women's safety, um, especially in Ireland over the last week there has been like kind of two cases that have come out with girls experiencing feeling not safe in hotels and situations, and it just doesn't seem to be getting any better this morning, like, does it really?
Speaker 2:it actually doesn't. You know what I know, I always say it and I'm so grateful that I live in Dubai like, so extremely grateful that I live here. But it can actually happen anywhere in the world. Like it can not just Ireland, not just Europe, it can happen here as well. Yeah, like it's. You'd want eyes in the back of your head, like literally. Yeah, it's so scary to think that girls going back to their hotel rooms in Ireland or anywhere in the world it may be, but to walk into your hotel for starters and pay that amount of money to not feel safe, like as everyone knows, like how much it is for a hotel in Ireland at the minute, like it's absolutely ridiculous. Even for one night, it's like 400, 500 quid like and no one to be even at a reception.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like it's shocking. Yeah, it's shocking. Yeah, but this isn't like this has been ongoing in Ireland for a long time. Yeah, like there has been many incidents, that shit like this has happened, but it just it gets pushed under the radar. Yeah, you know what I mean. Where there's what's happening is there is no security on the door. If there is security, they're not checking that. The people they're letting people into the hotel, they're not even fucking staying there, you know? I mean, um, they're just if there is any instance like that, if someone needs anything, there's no one there. No, there's no one there. Like it's, it's a massive issue, but this has been going on years and what annoys me about it is because there's a similar situation that I know of has happened, and that was a couple of like three years ago now, and now the same situation is happening in another whole fucking hotel to another young girl. So, like, where does it stop? Do you know what I mean? Like like.
Speaker 2:I just don't understand. Like for a country to like be so out there with. Like do you know be like to be fair in Ireland? Like it is quite safe. It's not, it's not the worst country in the world. Like do you know, what I mean.
Speaker 2:But when it comes to the amount of taxes people pay, right, the amount the economy has gone fucking bust, like up in the air with like absolutely everything, and how expensive it's gone, right, yeah, no one can really complain to the fact that, like, even people that work in hotels are on a good salary, like a good enough salary to keep their eyes open on these things. Like where, where does it stop?
Speaker 2:like like literally, like you see a girl walking into a hotel yeah, like he said that he checked the camera and he just presumed it was her boyfriend. Like how can you just presume it's someone's boyfriend? Like I do not understand it at all. No, like I live in an apartment block, okay, and I know I live in probably one of the most safest countries in the world, but even at that there's a security man at the door.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I go to the girl's apartment. They ask for my Emirates ID, do they? In an apartment block? This is not even in a hotel. So if you go to a hotel or if someone's staying in a hotel like my family were over here recently I had to show my ID before I went up. There's someone at the lift checking your ID. Like I don't understand how this is not a thing in every country, because if this system was in every country, then everyone would feel safe and secure at all times yeah, so you mean to tell me there's someone supposed to be on a desk 24 hours, especially in a hotel room or in a hotel?
Speaker 1:sorry, yeah, and they're not even at the desk, like what like it's actually just it's just it's scary, like because I know there was a um, like it could happen anywhere, because I remember it was about two year and a half, two years ago, like I got followed like and like that. It was a situation where I was literally parked two minutes away so I was on I forget what the name of that place is there on Grafton Street and I was at an event came out, hugged the girls. I literally had to walk straight across to like Brown Thomas, which is right across the street, and walk across like behind that to Grafton Car Park. And you know, you just know someone's like I was like you get a weird vibe, yeah, and I was like walking past like brown thomas and I kind of looked in the window I could see this like yellow jacket and I was like I was like maybe it's just my head. So I was like right, I'll slow down, and if they go past it's in my head, so I slow down, but then they slow down so I'm back behind me. So I was like fuck right.
Speaker 1:So I got to the end of like Brown Thomas, like you know where the Louis Vuitton section is, you know like we're on the outside when you're walking, and I took my phone out and I seen him going across the other side of the road and then at that point I was kind of like, oh he's, I'm obviously able to make it up my own head, like you know. I mean, he's obviously gone down there, yeah. So I stood there for maybe two minutes and started to walk. Again the fucker came back around the corner. He was like, obviously looking. So at this point I was like what the fuck am I gonna do? Like, because I didn't want him following me to my car.
Speaker 1:So I've seen this like man in a business suit and I was like, sorry, can I just stand here for a second beside you? And he's like, yeah, you're right. And I was like, oh, I don't know, I just get a weird vibe off that person there. And then he come up to me, the man, and he was like oh, I just want to tell you, you look so beautiful, but I let on, I didn't speak English.
Speaker 1:I don't know why I did that. I don't know why I did that, but I just panicked, yeah, and but you would automatically? Yeah. So he kind of just like stood across the road staring at me like so, the man that I was like standing with the business suit. He was like here, come on inside, like. So I was like right, so I kind of stood at the ticket machine for like definitely a good 15-20 minutes been like, just to see if he was gone, because I didn't want him like following me to my car. Do you know what I mean? But like I legged it to my car, like, and that was like like in broad daylight in Dublin city centre and I literally had what like not even a two-minute walk, do you know what I mean? It happens anywhere. It does.
Speaker 2:It happened me in a gym like I I'm not even joking like I was going to this gym, safest gym ever. Loved it, had a boyfriend at the time. Um, anyway, I'm in the gym. This different nationality and not blaming that, it's a different nationality, but obviously there was just a little bit of lack of communication. So he comes over to me saying he's impressed. I don't know if I did.
Speaker 1:I speak about this on the no, I think you told me, but I don't think we told our listeners about it. Okay, yeah anyway.
Speaker 2:So going to the gym, seen him in there a couple of times. Whatever, he's a lot older than me. He's huge, by the way, so you can visualize this man. He wears bandana, big muscly, like huge scary man. Like you know, one of those men that just scream when they're like lifting heavy weights. Yeah, like I'm just like just shut up.
Speaker 2:While you scream and slam my weights on the floor like shut up. Anyway, he always kind of terrified. You know, when you just get a feeling in your body like when you walk past someone like you just get a weird vibe, yeah, so he always used to steer his steer, like most girls whatever, like kind of turned a blind eye to it. So there was one day in particular when it first all started and I was up like the back of the gym, so the gym was kind of in an L shape and I was finishing my workout and I was doing core and I was lying on the mat. He put his legs like over me and he was like hey, hello, like this.
Speaker 2:And I had earphones in and I was like yeah, and I kind of went back on the mat a bit and sat up and I was like yeah, he was like you me coffee and I was like sorry, like that he goes, you me go for coffee and I was like absolutely not, like I have a boyfriend. He was like yeah, no, no, no, you don't have a boyfriend at this stage. We're actually after breaking up, um, but no one kind of knew about what kind of thing okay so he was like I know, you don't have a boyfriend, I know this.
Speaker 2:Like la la la, you haven't been in here with him the last couple of weeks. And I was like yes, I have, like we're together. He's like no. So a couple of days go by, I started mixing up the time and so I was going to the gym. Then, okay, yeah, don't know how, but he always managed to be there the time that I was going. I was starting to freak out because to get my steps and I used to walk to the gym and walk back from the gym okay constantly.
Speaker 2:So my mom and my dad were like no, you're not doing that anymore, like we're just gonna bring you, make sure that you get there safe, whatever starts coming up to me again, harassing me, constantly harassing me, like saying and I'm going to mention this stuff on here because it's just a bit weird um, saying stuff to me, I've said it to the boys in the gym. Cut long story short, this was going on for a couple of weeks. Said it to the boys in the gym. They approached him, got him kicked up and out of the gym because obviously he's making someone feel very uncomfortable in the gym. Then I get a request on Instagram from him. So basically, I forgot to mention he used to call me a Lily, okay, okay, so he said you're like a Lily you blossom.
Speaker 2:You bloom every time I see you. Okay, so this account? No, it's fucked up. It's actually fucked up. So this account bear in mind that message me had no profile picture, whatever it was in request. He was like hello, my lily, I've been watching you. The minute he said lily, my heart went in to my stomach. I was like this man clearly has a weird obsession. Yeah, okay, block the account. Went to the police, showed the police, told them everything, whatever they done, absolutely nothing after the never like nothing at all. So do you know the way it comes up on instagram like block any accounts, like la la, la that he may, yeah, yeah, um, create or whatever. Lo and behold, I move here, even get more messages off pages calling me Lily. He was the only human.
Speaker 2:Like the boys in the gym were laughing Like once they kind of, you know, kicked him out and he couldn't come back, and I think they were like oh, good morning Lily, how are you today? But I was like it's not okay, really. Do you know what I mean? It's absolutely not okay. It's not okay. No, do you know what I mean? It's absolutely not okay. It's not okay, even in a gym. Yeah, like they just don't care, but that's the thing. I feel like if they really wanted to do damage, they will do it but this is what concerns me as well.
Speaker 1:Like simone, it's not even like like the likes of, say, the girls getting followed to the hotel, or like you in the gym, or like, say, me getting followed to the car or to the car. It's even little tiny things, right it's, I think as well it can be like a cultural thing as well of how some men can treat women like, how it's accepted. Maybe in some countries that's not accepted, like here. Like I know Ireland, in fairness, like we are evolved a lot in regards to like we are like, do you?
Speaker 2:know what I mean. Even the way men talk to women I think are is quite respectful. Yeah, in Ireland I will say that about Ireland.
Speaker 1:The way men speak to women in Ireland is well ahead of other countries. Do you know what I mean? In some countries, those poor women, the way they are treated is fucking shocking. They are still so far behind about 100 years. And the problem is, if anyone comes over to Ireland to live here from like other cultures and this is not me being fucking one bit racist or anything, this is just me speaking facts their cultures are different, yeah, but they're. They're coming into another country where they have been brought up to believe this is okay and now they're over here and they can't accept that.
Speaker 1:Women over here won't accept it. Do you know what I mean? It can even be small things like even small things like I suppose you might see, like in places where, if you're on holidays, even where you'll see like waiters giving males their drink before women, yeah, or in some countries as well, they actually won't serve a woman without a man being present, like that's. That's true. This actually happened to my cousin. I actually think she was in. Where was she? She went into a shop and she went to get like lays or something and she went up to buy them and they wouldn't serve her unless my friend Like in a supermarket.
Speaker 1:I swear to God, I'm really sure where was she on holidays? I may actually ask her, but I remember this that she was in a supermarket and she had to get her boyfriend to go up to the counter where because he wouldn't serve her without a man been there. That's wild, yeah, crazy, that's actually wild. Um, but like there is still there's a lot of things that like it's just so hard for women like I. Just I worry, I really do worry about girls coming up with the world like it just it is, and it does seem to be getting a whole lot worse and it is getting worse.
Speaker 1:Have you looked at actually have you looked at adolescence on netflix? No, oh, simone, you need to look at that you need to put that on.
Speaker 1:um, it's so deep that program that it makes me deeply concerned, like just how, how misogyny is still so big with young people, like of how males are being brought up to think that just because a woman doesn't like find them attractive, like they will put vengeance on them and hate them, like they hate women, like it's it's crazy, but I just I don't know it's mad. I worry a lot like with this whole.
Speaker 2:Definitely Scary life. So I feel like, though it's going to Something really, really bad is going to end up happening for them to like knuckle down on it, and it's going to be too late.
Speaker 1:But what more actually has to happen, like we've? Already had so many shit cases honestly, it's actually terrifying.
Speaker 1:And for a woman to feel that unsafe like even on a night out or walking in pure and utter daylight, like you in Dublin to feel that intimidated by a man yeah, you know and the funny thing is even about that night, like now, I, when it happens difference, like I remember that happened to me, like it was very minuscule, like nothing actually happened, um, but I remember thinking that day I was like maybe if I wasn't wearing those pink boots he wouldn't have followed me. Or maybe if I wasn't dressed up because obviously I came straight from the event maybe if it wasn't like wear makeup or dressed up I wouldn't have happened. But this is what happens when you, when you are a woman, that's after yourself, you do blame yourself. Now now, looking back myself like cop on Melissa. But when you're in woman, that's after you, do blame yourself. Now, looking back at myself, I'm like cop on Melissa.
Speaker 1:But when you're in that moment and something like that happens to you, you do go shit. Am I the problem? Which is so wrong? It doesn't matter what you're doing or what you're wearing. The problem is that women have just been getting blamed for years and it's the men, it's their behaviour that's the problem, not women. Do you know what I mean? And as well, we can't just blame men because there is women out there who call women lawyers as well for coming forward about any cases, which is no facts. Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 2:Yeah, so there is no blame game, really, but it's just. It is very concerning, yeah, that this is going on, and I just feel, like it's the younger generation, like I remember when I was a teenager, like, yeah, your parents would always make you aware or whatever. But you could walk home and like, yeah, they might have a little bit of a worry, or you might feel like, oh, I need to run up this road now to get home, or whatever. But nowadays it's literally like no, you cannot be on your own. You can't go for a run on your own, like you can't go for a walk on your own, like it's because you just don't know who's going to come along and within a split second, you're either taken or you're damaged.
Speaker 1:And like this isn't like a thing, as I'll try fucking scaremonger everyone, but it is just like I think spread away, it's not it's to make people more aware, though it is Like you, as Simone said, you literally need eyes in the back of your head, like you. You, like you, as Simone said, you literally need eyes in the back of your head. Like you, you nearly have to think out you can still do everything right, can I just say, and shit will still happen. But it is just having that extra like awareness and diligence and just being safe, like I really wish we were allowed to have pepper spray. I'm sorry. Like, as a woman, we should be allowed to have pepper spray.
Speaker 2:Like you should always carry something, though. Yeah, especially if you're on your own, like, and especially like, say, I'm not trying to scare you either, but, like, if you're out running or whatever, like, just make sure that you have a getaway card. Yeah, like, you actually genuinely do need one, because it's not okay, like, and if this is what it's going to come to to make someone feel more safe, then this is what you have to do, because you just you, honestly, you never know and you need to be very careful as well, as the girl mentioned when she was speaking about her situation in the hotel. Um, you literally have to be so careful, even on a night out, because who's around you, where you're staying, where you're going, what location, what area you're in, because you just don't know who's following or who's listening.
Speaker 1:No, and it's the same with social media do never post.
Speaker 2:Live where you are. I always, always, even though I live here, I post in the evening, like now and again. Like now and again, yeah, I might just put up like a story or whatever, like a suite here. Like you know, I know nothing if I'm at the beach no one's gonna come and take me, but and like just in general, or if you're on holidays or wherever you might be, don't always post live, wait until you, you come home and feel safe and then 100%, yeah and as well.
Speaker 1:Another thing is that, like for younger people um, this is maybe for people who are listening to have kids like that have snapchat, just make sure their location is off, like because I feel like snapchat is the fucking worst, like.
Speaker 2:I don't know a snapchat like good when you have kids when their location is on like I don't know if it's good or bad, because the parents obviously can see where they are from their live location and if something does happen like they are.
Speaker 1:If the kids have an iphone, though, you can check their live location. Yeah, that is true, you know, I mean where. I just I know for a fact, right when I was. This has happened to my friend that, like she would have when she was out, like a certain person would just pop up outside like at the end of the night, like if this went on continuously for a little while and it was because our snapchat location was on that is so freaky, you know yeah, so turn off that is so weird isn't it so weird, so fucking weird, but yeah.
Speaker 1:So I just think if we can always be a bit more aware, carry some sort of little weapon, have someone on speed dial? Can't you do that thing now where you just press, like a number, and it calls someone straight away? Yeah, you set it up, though, don't you? Yeah, um, but yeah, need some sort of like little alarm or something. Do you know? I mean? But it is, look, and to be honest, you can even plan to have all these things and I do this and do that, and until you're in that situation and in that moment, you don't know how you're going to react or what we are going to do, because I know when people say, well, they should do this, no, you get so freaked out that you literally go into a shell. You don't know how you're going to react to situations like this. Do you know what I mean? So you just have to be hyper vigilant and aware. I think. Do you know what I mean as best as you can.
Speaker 2:You know definitely so just be aware, girlies and boys for the product of the week.
Speaker 1:I'm going to go with the new mac strobe blushes. Have you tried them? No oh, divine, so nice like they're they're, yeah like. It's exactly like, say, the strobe cream, if you've used that but obviously a bit more pigmented, like with a blush, but it's really really subtle. It's not like your normal, say, liquid blush, simone. It kind of is very like nearly like that sun kiss kind of. Look where it looks like you're flushed rather than a blush. Does that make sense?
Speaker 2:well, I have sephora vouchers from my birthday, so I feel like you've influenced me to buy this. Maybe I'm gonna test it out and try it, but you're to blame if I waste my pouches on you.
Speaker 1:No, honestly you're to blame. No, I do, you'll. You'll love them, like, because they're just you like it. You like a glowy old chic. Yeah, you're a blush girl like myself, yeah.
Speaker 2:I love the Dior one oh, my heart is on that like I love it so I'm very much of a creature. I have it, but I'll definitely give it a go yeah, do so.
Speaker 1:You can give us your, give us our your update next week if you do get the macarons done. Okay, so for our positive affirmation of the week we have. This is hard, but I can do it. I will let go of what does not positively serve me. Every day is a new opportunity. Repeat that again. I will find gratitude in my heart I love that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, what an affirmation to end what an affirmation Getting ready for a week of positive vibes only, please, and thank you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, positive vibes, only because I tell you one thing this is the shittiest year I've ever had, so fuck off.
Speaker 2:No, it isn't. It's going to be the best, it's going to be the best.
Speaker 1:I promise it's going to be. It was a bad start of the year, but thank you so much for taking your time and listen to us today and make sure that you follow us on spotify or apple podcast and make sure you head on over to our instagram channel and give us a follow there and we will chat to you next week. Chat to you next week. Bye.
