Family Over Everything (with Sania Khiljee) Artwork

Immigrant Unfiltered with Hamza Ali

Thought-provoking success stories, captivating tales of immigration, and hard-hitting questions — all on Immigrant Unfiltered. Hosted by Hamza Ali of Hamza Invests, this show celebrates the resilience and determination of immigrants and their families while sharing their stories as newcomers in America. Each week, a new guest will discuss their entrepreneurial journey, personal brand building, and the experiences within their industry that lead them to the top. With a focus on inclusivity and transparency, Immigrant Unfiltered invites listeners to join in on intimate conversations that showcase the triumph of the human spirit. Subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts so you never miss an episode.

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Immigrant Unfiltered with Hamza Ali

Family Over Everything (with Sania Khiljee)

March 22, 2023 • Hamza Ali • Season 1 • Episode 4

Episode 04: Overcoming trauma and learning to thrive.

After making it through the other side of a traumatic incident, living with borderline personality disorder, and having to physically rehabilitate from burnout, Sania Khiljee decided to make sweeping changes in her life. Forgoing a job in the family business and the potential to make millions, she gave it all up to focus on sharing her life, her recovery, and those closest to her online — and turned it into a booming career. This week, Hamza discusses the nepo baby label, mental health, rejecting hustle culture, and more with this inspiration to hundreds of thousands.

If you enjoyed the episode, be sure to subscribe for more inspiring and thought-provoking conversations.

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Let’s work together: hamzainvests.com

Visit our website: immigrantunfiltered.com

For all inquiries, please email: zahra@hamzainvests.com

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Connect with Sania:

saniakhiljee.com

instagram.com/saniasfamily

youtube.com/@saniasfamily

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Hamza: 0:00

Ladies and gentlemen, today we have Sonya kk. That's, did I get that right? You did. I did. Okay. We have Sonya as a guest. Well, I know her as Sonya's family, honestly, and I think we're gonna get into that a little bit. But thank

Sania: 0:12

you for being here. Thank you for having me. It's back in my old, uh, hometown. So back in

Hamza: 0:17

your old town, Sugarland. Yeah, we did talk about that a little bit, uh, before we started the podcast. And it's interesting to see how people move around. Well, you moved around I think, for a reason. Um, and then somehow now I don't think you can move away from yeah. From, from where you moved, uh, just because of the situation you got going on at home. but yeah. So you were, you know, Houston based, um, Talker, I would say. Uh, but prior to that, of course, you're an entrepreneur. Uh, you know, I would say you are somewhat of a philanthropist because you're giving back to the community in ways that, um, I'm sure a lot of people know. And, uh, recently you went through, you know, a lot of changes in your life. And I've been, I've been following you on social media for quite some time now, and I've seen that you share things, uh, that people generally don't share about. And I wanted to

Sania: 1:03

talk about that a little bit. I do, I'm trying to learn how to be a little bit more filtered because my family's like, Sonya, come on man. You really didn't have to go that far. But I think it is very powerful. Like there's not, I would say like sometimes I look at my own social media accounts or myself as a person, and I'm like, why do people even follow me? Like, I feel like in so many ways I'm so average. But I think the one thing is that like, for some reason I just truly don't care what others think. And that was. Both a blessing and a curse when it came to social media, because I do talk about things especially that like I really haven't heard in the Pakistanian Indian

Hamza: 1:47

community. Yeah, exactly. And I think that's something that really drew us to you, uh, is that, you know, you are a little unfiltered and we like that and you know, we definitely want to get into that and discuss that now. Um, of course, first question I always like to ask all my guests is who is Sonya? So if you had to draw an image, paint a portrait, sing a song, you know, write a verse, whatever it was, uh, who

Sania: 2:11

is Sonya? Well, I mean, if we wanna go like the religious route, just, you know, a servant of God, um, that is one of the changes that has really, um, impacted me very recently is just becoming so much more closer to, to God and so much more devout. And so I would just really humble myself and say, that's really all I am. But, um, beyond that, Sonya's family is, Really showcasing my day-to-day life as a wife, a mother, a daughter, and a sister, and doing that in a, in the filter and in the context of someone who's been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. So the irony of my life is all I talk about is my relationships when I have a diagnosis that makes relationships extremely difficult.

Hamza: 2:57

So let's, let's go back on religion for a second. So you said, you know, more recently into religion. Um, and so what was that like? What was that journey like for you and what caused it to become that?

Sania: 3:10

So I, maybe I should have shared this a little more openly online, but I feel like I've always been religious. but outwardly, maybe not so much that people might think, but I, I mean, as a child I was very devout, like never missed a prayer as a kid. And, um, I actually wore hijab in college as well. I went through something really traumatic with an engagement that broke off and it was just like a really difficult time in my life. And I decided to stop wearing hijab at that time just because I needed to kind of regather and regroup myself. When I met my husband and I do talk about this on social media, he wasn't very religious. Um, extremely, extremely handsome though. So I gave him a pass and um, you know, I brought up the idea to him like, Hey, I kind of wanna start wearing the hijab again soon. And, you know, even being the husband of someone who wears a hijab, it comes with a lot of responsibility. Um, and he wasn't ready for that at that time, but, Last October, we went through a very difficult time in our marriage personally. It kind of came out of nowhere. So I don't like to, to pull like the evil eye Nuzzer card, but it really went from like great to like really, really bad in like a very strange way. Um, and so both of us separated for like three or four weeks and you know, that's the first time that had ever happened where it got to that point. And how

Hamza: 4:44

long were you guys married at that point? Seven

Sania: 4:46

years. Yeah, so we separated for about, I think two, three weeks actually. And it was just in that time something cracked open in my husband and this man who had never really been religious, really, truly, and honestly found God in that time, which is, if I look back at that time now, I'm grateful for it because, ironically, last Ramadan, I had cried all of last Ramadan and asked a letter, bring me closer, bring my husband closer to him. And then this situation happened. And then now in this Ramadan, he is my inspiration. He does not miss a prayer. He spends his night studying Islam deeper. And for me, that was the catalyst to go deeper into my faith. And so now, again, started wearing a hijab. Recently applied to, um, ALMA programs. And I'm hoping to use my platform to make people, not just Muslims, but all people more spiritually connected with the creator.

Hamza: 5:46

So prior to us, uh, you know, uh, starting this conversation, we had a conversation around how, you know, your extended family's here and you know, your channel is, uh, surrounded, you know, around your family, and you discuss your daily life. What is different with you? Um, From your family, because obviously you're different. You have, you have something that is very, you know, unique and you're a content creator. Uh, and that's a journey in itself and that takes a lot out of a person. And I don't think people realize how much pressure, how much pressure, and how much effort you have to put into just making those 32nd videos. Right? Yeah. So what's different,

Sania: 6:25

well, first off, your channels are phenomenal too. So I wanna commend how well you've done as a content creator. Um, my sister is also a creator, so my sister runs, um, happily Mads on Instagram and Mads Dani on TikTok. So I think as sisters we share a lot. But the one thing that makes me different from my family truly is like, I really don't care what others say. And you will never find me trying to buy like the nicest house or the nicest car to try and impress someone. Uh, like you will never see me trying to dress a certain way to impress people. I am like, if someone is like, oh, where'd you get that dress from? I'll be like, oh my God, let me tell you. I got her for $12 here. Like very, um, just unfiltered. And I think also having borderline personality disorder impacted me a lot. A because I'm extremely creative. Um, and I do come from a creative background as well. Like my dad is a phenomenal, phenomenal, um, artist, which a lot of people don't know about him. So I, we do have a little bit of that, but I would say I'm the most creative in my family and I have to do some creative work, otherwise I can't. Like, I can't sustain my soul. So for me, I opted out of making like millions of dollars working in the family business to choosing something that is gonna bring me sufficiently less income, but that nourishes my soul and my heart. And so I think that would be, again, one of the biggest differences.

Hamza: 7:51

So let's talk about that. Uh, family business, millions of dollars left, all of that, uh, to find some type of fulfill. how did you at any point work with your family?

Sania: 8:02

Oh yeah. For 10 years. And what was that journey like? Um, straight outta college. So I'm the eldest daughter, so if I'm telling you the journey of this, I have to take it all the way back to college and high school days with me doing my homework on the kitchen counter. And every night my dad afterwards would just, like, he would go to the fridge and he would just hang out and he would just start making small talk and we would just start talking about dreams and businesses and ideas. And we would just talk for hours and hours. I'm pretty sure he's not allowed to say he has a favorite, but I am very connected with my dad. We are very similar. And so that was really the start for me. And I went to school, I went to University of Houston for marketing and sales and entrepreneurship. So I graduated, um, and went straight into like literally. Having from business school into managing about, I think it was like 120, 130 people. And that was, you know, a little bit of a rough, rough adjustment for anybody learning how to start up a fully brand new business and managing people and gaining the respect of your employees when really the role had been given to you versus, um, you know, we hear about NPO babies, that was me. I am a npo, baby. So in that sense, you know, that was a rough adjustment. But my favorite part about my family business was working with my parents every day. Like, I'm such a loser. Like I'm third in my thirties. I love seeing them. I can't, I can't stop seeing them. I am literally at their house nonstop. They can't get rid of me. I bought a house five minutes away, obsessed with my parents. So may God give them a long life. But that was my favorite part of the family business. My least favorite part being, um, Again, just entrepreneurship can be very creative, but it wasn't creative enough for me. It wasn't the right outlet. It wasn't. I am like, am I heart and soul, a storyteller and a writer? And so I didn't get a chance to do that. In business, you always have to worry about, oh, what are people gonna say? What are people gonna think? You have to present yourself a certain way. But the most authentic version of Sonya is completely unfiltered. And so now I get to do something where I can talk about myself and be myself and not worry about what my customers think. Who are your customers today? Nowadays it's just major corporations that I sell ad, you know, sell ads to, and I create content for them. And you know, of course making, um, money through views as well on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, all of the above. I am on every platform, and I'm very blessed that I didn't just blow up on one platform, but I've truly and honestly honed my craft so that. all of my platforms are either close to a hundred k if not exceeding at this point. So it is something that I've been working on. I started content creation literally seven years ago, and I've been studying social media and algorithms and marketing in

Hamza: 11:03

depth sense. And what are you seeing as far as algorithm? Because I feel like they change every single day.

Sania: 11:08

You can never get comfortable on social media. It's like the minute you get comfortable, um, something changes. So right now we're seeing a few things. Uh, Instagram and Facebook are about to stop their creator fund and they're about to charge for verification and in, and also when you get that verification, you'll also be purchasing increased exposure. It's becoming more pay to play. So I think meta is in a lot of. In that regard. I think that's a really, really rough move. There's been talks again about the TikTok ban. I really hope that it doesn't go through, but there is, you know, that those talks have resurfaced over information and privacy issues. So we'll just see, sit back and never say never. We'll just have to see what happens. YouTube, I think, remains the most consistent and for me is where I am personally putting most of my energy in this year.

Hamza: 12:01

And as far as revenue, are you seeing YouTube being number one in revenue or is, is it

Sania: 12:05

TikTok or, um, TikTok is my, my largest platform. So I think I'm close to about like, I think like six 50 or something on there. So TikTok for me is my highest earning platform. But what surprises people is remarkably, Facebook was second for me, which is so funny because a lot of people are like, people still use Facebook. And I was like, actually, they do. And so for me, Facebook was number two. Um, up until recently. Now that they're gonna stop their creator fund, we'll see what happens. And then I would say number three is Instagram. Um, actually no, number three is YouTube. Because YouTube just started it's shorts revenue program. Things are change. You're right, things are changing so fast. So YouTube now is allowing you to monetize shorts. So I'm on there hitting that heart. So YouTube's number three for me. And Instagram's number four for me right now.

Hamza: 12:53

I feel like YouTube shorts, revenue wise is a gimmick. Like I think we made the first month they launched the shorts thing. We made like 19 cents. But the fact that they could say that, Hey, you know, uh, here you are, here's revenue from short. Uh, had a lot of creators jumping from now TikTok and focusing on YouTube, and I feel like because of this whole TikTok band, the thing that you just mentioned, a lot of creators are actually putting a lot of energy into YouTube, and we're seeing that, just like you

Sania: 13:18

said, well, YouTube does pay pretty well. Um, I, I will say, uh, it takes time. YouTube's one of those platforms where it's like, I think the first year didn't get anywhere. Then I started to take it a little bit more seriously, didn't get anywhere. Then I found a mentor who made me tweak literally just one thing, which is just my titles, and after that it blew up. I went from like three in December, I had 3000 subscribers, where in March now, and I'm about to hit 50,000. And so for me, I would say I've hit that like traction point where the money's gotten a little bit better, but also it's your long form when with your long form content, you can earn pretty well as well. And I know that. Once you become big enough, I mean, YouTube is sufficient to like really live a phenomenal, fantastic lifestyle in terms of earnings. But you know, again, everything is changing so rapidly. Like when, how long is even shorts going to be short? Video forms going to be trending? Like right now, I know since Covid happened, short videos have really skyrocketed. Podcasts are kind of the next wave. There's like a new wave of like YouTube podcasts that are, that are gonna be taking off soon. So that I know is where a lot of creators are putting their energy as well. But you know, it's, it's to be seen I think, at the basis of every content as one thing, which is telling a story or providing something of value. And so that's never gonna

Hamza: 14:46

change. Yeah, I agree. I think you become the brand and that's what people are invested in, right? They just wanna see you and they wanna see what you're up to. And so it's, it's literally something that I think is irreplaceable. Um, as a brand, but as far as content and algorithms and the youth, what I'm noticing now is that my kids, for example, I have, you know, my son is 12 and my daughter is 11. They're on TikTok, and they're so used to the. The swipe, you know, they just keep swiping and keep swiping. I asked my son the other day, I'm like, Hey, do you have Instagram? He's like, what's that?

Sania: 15:15

Oh my God. And be real. Yeah. I know that a lot of, uh, little kids are using that as well too. I tried to use it, but then I started wearing hijab and then I was like, man, I am not gonna scramble in one minute to put this hijab on and get a beer reel. Like, no, this is not the platform for me. TikTok has that too, right? Yeah. TikTok now, same problem for me. Three minutes I'm like, yes, three minutes. I, I, unless I'm wearing a hoodie and can throw it on, you're gonna get the same videos. It was like the same thing every day, which is like, I should have been working, but I was playing with Animals and that was literally my, like TikTok now every time. But yeah, it's, it's really interesting. It's fun for me to see how quickly platforms change. And what's really, really interesting is to see like how many people give up in terms of creators. Like they'll hit success on one platform and then when it goes away, they just disappear and they. Don't have that tenacity to keep going. So for me, I was on Instagram first and then it died for a little bit, and I literally lost followers for two years and I just didn't stop. I just kept going. And then literally, I could have just stopped being a content creator at that point. But literally got on TikTok right after that and blew up. And then when

Hamza: 16:31

did you get on TikTok, right? Was it right

Sania: 16:33

at the pen? Covid? Yeah. Got bored. Had a baby. Yeah. Yeah. Made some fun, cute videos with her. And actually, I didn't even start off as a family creator. You'll find this interesting. My roots were as a entrepreneurship and personal development creator. That's what, that's the content I started with. Complete opposite then what you do now. Now it's like. what brings Sonya Joy you know, that's literally, you know, and it's about my family and it's about my animals and it's about my day to day and it's like the opposite of everything. I had once preached. I was always like, pick a niche, go all in. Now I'm like, do whatever you want. And it worked somehow. Yeah.

17:15

And

Hamza: 17:16

that if, look, if that's what brings you joy, that's what you should be doing. Cuz that's what you're most passionate about and you'll continue all the way doing that.

Sania: 17:23

Yeah. It's, it's, I, I was talking to my husband about this, uh, just two or three days ago. He was asking me, you know, like, he's like, you know, if I, if his, he's the software engineer. And he was like, you know, if I had like unlimited money, would I still be doing software engineering? No, probably not. And I was like, you know, if I had all the money in the world, I would still be doing what I'm doing. Cuz it's not a job for me. It's just, it's my, it's so much fun. I would hopefully never stop. There was a moment that I. Questioned my intentions, especially as you get closer to like religion and you start looking into it and how do I use my platform in a way that can serve others, uh, be good and serve me not only in this life, but the next one. And so for me, I have been refining my intentions a little bit, but I feel pretty confident about continuing till the day I die, hopefully.

Hamza: 18:15

Yeah. In Charla. Um, so let's talk a little bit about your jour, your journey with TikTok, of course, and your journey with content creation when you really ramped it up. But before that, you, you had mentioned that you had a business and, uh, prior to that, you know, you were doing business development and of course at that time you were an entrepreneur. And I don't know if, like, I didn't know that until I talked to you before this podcast. Walk us through that journey. How did that life, you know, Sonya, the entrepreneur, come to be?

Sania: 18:41

So again, npo baby roots, it is what it is. Um, at least I own it. So, um, you know, again, sitting at the kitchen counter with my dad, learning about business every day, stepping into the family business, which was preschools, preschool, franchises. So at that point, I opened my own location and ran that for a few years, and I did really well. And then my dad went over and partnered with kids, our kids China, to become not a franchisee, but the franchisor. So now you have all of these potential Chinese franchisees that were coming to see our location, which was like the showcase location. And I was training them and basically setting them up for the sale of the franchise. So that was like a really. Really interesting experience. And then as I was there, um, got the idea. So as I was in early childhood education, I got the idea to do a subscription box. So my first e-commerce business was then this, this business I did on my, with my husband and not my, my fam, my, my, uh, parents. And so my husband and I created a subscription box for baby brain development. So from zero to three, we'll send you educational materials that will help you to engage with your baby in a way that will help their brain develop. And so I did that. We were very close to a thousand subscribers when my spine really started to begin. like deteriorat, deteriorate. Um, I was working nonstop. I was at newlywed at that point. I was working literally weekends, nights. I So, hold on.

Hamza: 20:14

You're telling me your spine deteriorated because of the physical work that you were

Sania: 20:18

doing? I was always hunched over working on my phone. I was always working and I was, um, I just wouldn't stop. I did not stop. I hit myself to a point of physical burnout. So I herniated two discs in my spine and that's when you started to really see the borderline personality disorder really start to resurface as well. So mental and physical depletion. And so I actually ended up selling that business because I was like, look, no amount of money or success or name. And it was actually a really interesting time because I got featured in Forbes, an entrepreneur in Inc. Huffington Post. Like things were blowing up. social media started growing, my business was taking off whatever. You start to realize that nothing matters when it comes at the cost of your health. So the great irony is any profit I made was going straight into doctor's appointments to try and fix my body. And so I got to that point where I was like, you know what? I'm gonna go ahead and I'm gonna sell this business. And, uh, you know, immediately after that, after I sold that, I was like, what am I gonna do? And I just started to like, go back into content creation a little bit and just, you know, just start to enjoy that. And I vowed that if I ever started another business, it would be one that I was passionate about and one that I could take a break from if medically necessary. And that is one thing that I am truly so grateful for social media for. If I ever have to just be like, you know what? I need a couple hours off, or I need a day off, or I need a week off, whatever. I can just, it's a very flexible business model. It's not like I have like millions and millions of dollars on the line if I don't like, you know, I can take a break. And for me, it has been truly a joy to create a business model that I am passionate about, that I can take a break from, and one that supports my physical and mental health as well as supporting the health of others.

Hamza: 22:12

Yeah, absolutely. The platform is, uh, I would say, uh, in one, in important ways, a way to give back. And I think a lot of people realize that, and a lot of people don't. You know, it is just the way people, I guess, look at, uh, the phone and look at the platform and the creator. Right. Right. Uh, now in your case, uh, you know, entrepreneur, life Ended, your content creation, uh, took, uh, you know, came, came into present, and at that time, I, I think. Was the time really to get into these, uh, the platform. I think there weren't enough creators and there was just not enough content being made. So, uh, you go in at that point and you are creating content that is more entrepreneurial, and then that, and then that journey kind of shifted and you're like, you know what? I just wanna be unfiltered.

Sania: 23:00

You know, that in itself was a very, it, it unfolded very naturally. So I was on Instagram starting like 2013, 14, the golden era. It was so easy to grow thousands and thousands of followers a day. It was fantastic. And I was basically, you know, inspired by your per just self-development and entrepreneurship, which was my entire life at that point. And I was running a business and I was constantly around entrepreneurs and even on my Facebook, on my social media, all I saw were entrepreneurs all the time. And I started to associate, when you get into those. Circles, I'm sure you are very familiar with this. It can become a very almost toxic hustle culture. Wake up at 5:00 AM sleep is for the week. Hustle. Grind till you die. Like your self worth is like actually your net worth. Like it's just a lot. There was a lot and I pushed myself too far trying to like prove something that no one needed me to prove, if that makes sense. Yeah, absolutely. And so then I had a baby right before the pandemic hits, which motherhood is the most transformative experience that any woman can go through, like physically, spiritually, emotionally, everything changes the minute you become pregnant. And so for me it's like, okay, I sold a business, I had a baby. I was in this like soul searching place, and then, okay, the pandemic hits. All right. Life was telling me to take a pause and. I just started to share like a few more personal stories and they were still self-development related on TikTok. But my, yeah, my first, um, my first viral TikTok was about like my failed engagement and sharing some stories of my past and 1.4, 1.5 million views. And literally when the followers came in, like water, like I have never seen my phone blow up like that before. As someone who is a marketing enthusiast and a storyteller just intuitively you follow, you know, you start to, so I started sharing more stories that were more self-development related. And then of course I had a really cute baby and I wanted to show her off, and she's adorable. And so I started sharing some of that and. You know, it was just a very unique experience in the sense that she's the only baby on both sides of the family. Well, everyone was like literally fighting each other to hold her and to love on her and to who's gonna pick her up from school and who's gonna break her outta school and who's gonna take her for ice cream. Just started sharing those FTE and cute and funny moments, and it blew up and so I think zero to 500 was Ave. 500,000 was a very fast journey. Uh, 500,000 to a million has been a slower road for me, but I'm trying not to get into the vanity metrics and just diversify is where I'm at right now, purifying my intentions with social media and just keep going. I'm hitting a little bit of a slowdown. That's when creators get demotivated, when they're not seeing that growth that they really, really want. That's fine. I'm in here. I'm here forever. I'm in no rush, so I'm just enjoying it.

Hamza: 26:21

Yeah, I guess that makes, uh, sense. And, you know, as these, as, as I guess the social media platforms get more crowded, it just becomes a little more difficult. And then of course there's these growth spurts that happen as you go more viral. A really interesting question that I think a lot of people would have here is, did you get any pushback on posting about your new baby? Because I know culturally that's something that people tend to avoid.

Sania: 26:47

So I actually never posted when I was pregnant at all. Like, I was just kind of like surprised. I have a kid one day, like three or four months after she was born, there was a little bit of pushback, uh, when she was born for safety reasons and things of that sort. There was also like, um, you know, you don't want her to get sick or anything because people have evil intentions. I do pray over her a lot and things of that sort and installed extra security around my home, you know. talk to her school about, you know, just making sure that nobody picks up unless it's me or my husband, and, um, those types of conversation. But for me now, one thing you may be noticing, especially for my followers, is that it's become a little bit less centric around Lily and a little bit about the entire family that's actually been very thoughtfully designed. Because Lily may get to the 0.1 day where she's only three right now, but she might get to the 0.1 day where she doesn't wanna be on camera, and that's fine. I will never push her to do something that she doesn't wanna do. She loves being an influencer, by the way. She, she like loves taking selfies and she, if I take a picture without her, she actually gets offended. But, um, she actually gets to go to like, toy conferences and stuff and she just gets like, so much free stuff. So, She's not really unhappy with it. She's, she's loving her little baby influencer life. Um, but you know, but you want

Hamza: 28:12

to give her that option. Yes. That if she decided not to do it, it's not like, you know, centered around her.

Sania: 28:17

Yeah. That's why I haven't really started like a page just for her yet. Um, if one day she wants to do that, great. Sounds good. Let's do it. But I'm gonna wait for her to make that decision. In the meantime, I'm gonna just keep showing you my entire family, cuz I don't want it to be pressure in of her seeing a camera in front of her face all the time. Now, even when I don't post her, I'm always taking pictures of her, so I need to like, just chill out. She's just so cute. But like, you know, I, um, we, we keep it pretty balanced in terms of like how much she's like exposed to the camera and how much we're filming her. My husband is very shy though, so every time I try to film him, people think he like, hates me and like, doesn't wanna be married to me. And I'm like, no. He just, It's very camera shy, so he's never gonna be the one to do dumb TikTok trends with me or funny videos. But I still get some sweet moments of him.

Hamza: 29:08

So speaking about funny trends and dumb TikTok videos, I actually am the complete opposite. So I started my TikTok journey cuz I saw this guy Gary V in 2020, the goat when I had, yeah, when I had sold my business. And he was like, you guys need to get on TikTok. And at that time he was promoting TikTok a lot. And I actually thought he was invested in TikTok because of the amount of promotion he was doing. Turns out he wasn't. So I started dancing and doing skits on TikTok cuz I had just sold my business. I had nothing to do and and so, I got to, I wanna say like 25,000 followers by dancing and doing funny skits. And then I was like, hold on, wait a minute. I can, you know, I can, I can probably like, educate people, uh, and monetize on this like, you know, TikTok trend. And then I started talking about business, um, and then I niche down and niche down, and now I only talk about one thing. Uh, but, uh, it's just funny how that journey kind of evolves and becomes what it is today. And with you. I think, uh, you, you're right, it's very balanced. We get to see your entire family, which is, which is awesome. But more importantly, your family is not just human. So you, you

Sania: 30:14

that took me a second. I'm like, wait, what are you trying to say? And then I was like, oh, wait, I understand So

Hamza: 30:20

you, you know, you have a, a lot going on and, uh, there's very interesting characters in your journey and you know, there's, there's ups and downs that come with those, uh Yeah. Characters as well. So let's talk about that a little bit. How did that come to be?

Sania: 30:33

So pandemic hit, I was turning 30. I was going through like my, I'm gonna call it my midlife crisis cuz I don't intend to live very long. I don't eat the healthiest So anyway, I was like, I won a pet monkey for my birthday and I like pulled over on the side of the road and I saw no, I was like, like on like this site and I was like, kind of like just starting to drive. And I saw, I was looking for a pet monkey originally and I saw this miniature horse named Alfie for for sale. Well actually I named him Alfie, it wasn't his name. And I pulled over on the side of the road. And I bought it, like right there, right there. Like, like Amazon? No, I just like put my deposit down on this. It's called Jana's. Exotic. Got it. So anyway, I was like, and I called my husband and I'm like, guess what? I just bought it He's like, what? And I was like, I just bought a miniature horse. And this is the first time I had pulled the stunt. So it was still new to him. And he is like, what did you just do? I'm like, yeah, I just bought a miniature horse. What is a miniature horse? It's exactly that. It's like, it was like the size of a dog. When we first bought him, he was like a little horse. Um, and then he grew to like the size of a pony. But anyway, we lived in Memorial at the time, which is not the place to have a horse. There's like a teeny tiny backyard. So anyway, I was like, oh, I'm gonna keep 'em in the staples. It'll be all right. And so I didn't think, I don't think that much. I just do.

Hamza: 31:58

Yeah. There's doers and there's thinkers.

Sania: 32:00

Yeah. I should probably do a little more thinking in my future. Oh, sometimes

Hamza: 32:03

the thinkers get in, you know, they don't do because they overthink everything.

Sania: 32:06

My husband's a thinker. I'm the doer. Somewhere in the middle. Well, we'll, we have a life. It's a combination. Um, so anyway, brought this miniature horse home. I was like, oh, the miniature horse needs a friend. So then I brought a pigmy goat home. Okay. And then, um, and then my husband's like, so what happened to the stables? I was like, no, the big horses are gonna pick on him. I can't take him there. And he's like, huh. And I'm like, we need to buy a house. He's like, what? And I'm like, yeah, it's gonna be a great idea. So anyway, we impulsively buy a house.

Hamza: 32:35

What, what, what? You buy a house because you have two pets that you don't wanna put somewhere else. Yes.

Sania: 32:40

Can you see My poor husband. God bless him. Yes. That's exactly what happened. And so I, I like, we buy this beautiful home that's literally in a forest. It's so pretty. And, and, um, yeah. So now we're in a, in. Bigger home now. Anyway, then Alfie develops attitude issues and starts biting me, get frustrated with him. Oh, and then one day I, no, I'm skipping a chapter. Then one day I impulsively find a kangaroo for sale and I'm like, hell yes, I have room. And so I come home with the kangaroo and my husband's like, you're putting, you're taking it too far now. And he was like, you gotta take the kangaroo back. And I'm like, I refuse.

Hamza: 33:22

Can you domesticate? Uh, kangaroo,

Sania: 33:24

uh, it was already deme. It was like born and raised, you know, in Texas. And female kangaroos are very, just fyi, female kangaroos are like the sweetest animals in the whole world. God bless her. I can finally talk about her without crying because, um, and I'll share what happened. No, I think I'm gonna cry. Um, so anyway, I got the kangaroo and she's just like the sweetest animal in the world. Anyway, the horse picks on me. The horse picks on my daughter. The horse picks on the kangaroo. The horse picks on the goat. He was a big time bully. He was like super sweet when I first got him, but as he got older, he was just like, had super attitude issues. And so I was like, listen, you need to go some. to someone who can like, actually like train you. And so, um, one of our family friends, um, he has a farm with some family, really, really nice guy. Um, he, uh, offers to adopt Alfie and take 'em off to live in with a lot, lot of ponies and ostriches and fun animals. And he's thriving there. So Alfie actually lives like 30 minutes away now. We rehome him. Things were going great. I had my two main coon cats. I had my goat and I had my kangaroo.

Hamza: 34:31

When did the Maine Coon Cats happen?

Sania: 34:32

We missed that part. Oh yeah, sorry. The Maine Coon Cats have been with me since I got married. Got it. Um, so yeah, so they've been there for a minute. So anyway, had, we were living really happily about a month ago. I went to New York for fashion week, come home and I was thinking, should I go kiss my animals first or do I take a shower? I was really tired. I decided to opt to take a shower. Instead, as I'm in the shower, the neighbor's pit bull breaks the fence. I'm gonna try not to cry. Um, and gets, gets jojo my kangaroo and I didn't see it. Um, my, my husband called my parents to come distract me and I was so confused because they were literally acting a fool trying to distract me. And my husband buried her, and he comes inside and he just holds me. And he is like, I have to tell you something and it's gonna hurt, so I just need you to be prepared. And I was very scared at that point. And he's like, he's like a pit bull gun in our yard. And I instantly said, and Jojo, and he goes, she's not, she's gone. Um, so I'm still grieving that. So

Hamza: 35:38

what, what happens to the pit

Sania: 35:39

bull in this case? Um, so in that case, I did not demand that the dog be euthanized only because, because pitbulls are vicious. Yeah. So I, I told them, look, you need to remove the dog. and you are in charge. Like you can decide if you're gonna euthanize your dog. I can't tell you to you, I can't force it. However, I just want you to be aware that now that this dog has tasted blood, they had a baby at their house. And also I have a child. That dog can't stay here cuz that could have been me. Had I gone out instead of taking a shower, I may have been dead. Like there, I, I could have been dis disfigured or maybe I could have saved my kangaroo. I don't know. And I, I keep playing these what if scenarios. I am grateful to God that my child was protected above everything else. Um, and it sucks because Jojo was literally my best friend. Like anyone who knows me, I was always outside in my backyard. She was my coworker. We just hung out together all day, every day. And I, you know, people have asked on social media, are you gonna get another kangaroo? And I just don't think I can, I can't replace her. There was something so special in her soul, and anyone who met her can testify to that. She was like, there was something in that specific animal that it was like too pure for this world. So, um, you know, I just pray that in some form I'm reunited with her. It's been really interesting. Ever since she passed away, I have these really beautiful birds that are the exact same color as her, just c all around my yard, just so many of them. And whenever I cry and I miss her, they come and sit right next to me. So, you know, Ola, I don't know, but, um, you know, in my grief, I, but two more goats, two more rabbits, Um, so I have got two baby goats right now and two baby rabbits that I literally got in the last like two weeks. Uh, Jack and Jill and I don't have names for. Rabbits right now. But if anyone is watching this, go vote on social media. I have a poll up right now. Um, where, where do they vote? Just go drop it on my Instagram. Share your share name ideas. Um, but yeah, so, um, my husband this is actually a fun story. I don't know if I'm getting too long as I talk about my animals, but I actually hid them in my closet. I hid the rabbits in my closet. It's actually, people on social media have seen this. I have like a panic attack room, so I knew that was like the one place my husband wasn't gonna go. And I have these teeny tiny little baby bunnies and I made like a little rabbit kingdom for them there. And so my husband just didn't know for the first several, like, for several days that my rabbits were even there. And then eventually, like, I felt really guilty and I was like, you're, you know, I'm not the wife that's ever gonna cheat. I'm just the wife who's gonna hide rabbits in their closet But I felt guilty enough for doing that. So then I was like, Na, I just want to let you know that I have animals in this house. And he's like, what did you bring? He's like, another kangaroo. I'm like, no. And I was like, and he's like, what is it? I'm like, you'll just have to find them And he just like took a deep breath and he just was like, you know what? I have nothing to say. Anyway, it was my child who ratted me out because then I was like, okay, I'm gonna go show her her rabbits. And she was like, bunnies. And so then she was like, daddy, mommy got bunnies. He's like, Lily, show me where they are. And Lily's like, look, come, come. I show you. When she took 'em to the thing and he walked in, he took one smell of that closet. He's like, Sonya, really, really we're doing this? He put them out in the wild. Yeah. So now they're in the, we have a garage where my cats live, and then I have another room in the garage, which my rabbits live. I have a six car garage and no cars are in there, which is why my car looks filthy outside, by the way. Um, but yes, I have now. Toddler, two rabbits, two cats, three goats

Hamza: 39:38

and that, and that's how it's gonna be? Or are we like, what's happening there? Let, let's talk about the five year

Sania: 39:44

plan no more for now. Okay. My, whenever one dies, then I grieve and I bring one more, but, um, right now, no more. I'm good. Um, and,

Hamza: 39:55

and just to be clear, the goats are not, like, you're not growing them to like then, you know, like

Sania: 39:59

consume them or No, no, no, no, no. I get asked that question a lot. Now these ones are my pet. And actually, I don't even think I can eat goat after raising a baby goat, just because they're actually like, people don't realize this, but like baby goats are like little puppies. My goat beautiful, just like jumps into my lap. He wants to sit in my lap and he just like licks my face. He's so cute. Jack is the cutest animal ever. Um, so they're very cute And, um, It's, yeah, I joke every, you know, that it's their time to go. But no, these, these guys are good. Um, they're here to stay. They're here to stay. They're here to just live their best life and headbut me, um, you know, trying to convince my ba my husband for baby number two, he said, absolutely no one child is enough. Plus I have you to deal with and all of your animals that you keep bringing home. But we'll see. I keep trying to change his mind, but it takes two to make a baby though. It does. It takes two to

Hamza: 40:54

tango, for sure. Yes. So we'll see. So let's talk about your husband here for a bit. Um, how'd you guys

Sania: 41:00

meet? Uh, here in Showgirl Land? Actually, we both went to, um, Austin High School. Um, I, we were both in the Muslim Student Association. I wa he was the, I don't remember what he was, I think he was like the treasurer or something. I was the secretary or historian or whatever. I don't even remember our positions. Anyway, had a huge crush on him. Huge crush on my husband, and he was like, Mr. Getting all the girls in high school and like literally I think all of the MSA female attendance was because we were there for him anyway. Um, I didn't say anything. And so one day he called me some for something MSA related. And actually, I'm not gonna tell that story. Um, suffice to say. Um, anyway, he started seeing someone else and, um, stuck for a little Just kidding, He started seeing someone, uh, and I was, um, really sad. And actually my first date with my ex-fiance was a double date with Nash and my friend. So interestingly, we ended up married to each other. God forgive us. Well, all the shit we did in high school. We're married now though, so things worked out the way it was supposed to. Okay, good.

Hamza: 42:24

And they ended up working out in the end?

Sania: 42:26

Yeah, I guess so. He hasn't left me yet. and all the animals from all the animals I keep bringing home. He's put up with it till now, but I really am not gonna push it any further. I think we're good with the animals and yeah, just looking forward to the next chapter of my life with him, which is truly diving more deep into our spirituality as a couple. Um, that's been very beautiful to see where we are. This Ramadan compared to last Ramadan is truly like the most beautiful thing because last Ramadan I was crying and praying and begging for my husband to get closer to faith. And this time, I mean we are knee deep in spiritual texts trying to cleanse our heart and soul of really just love for this world and just it's bringing us so much closer.

Hamza: 43:09

So I'm just gonna mention one thing. You mentioned your husband wasn't religious at all, and then you mentioned all the high school stuff with the MSA stuff that was going on. Now, the reason I bring the I,

Sania: 43:18

sorry. Uh, that was too, I mean, we are an immigrant unfiltered So Mom, I'm sorry. All the times I told you I was going to study all that stuff unfiltered. I was lying. May God forgive me, may

Hamza: 43:30

God forgive me. So the reason I bring this up is because I mentor a lot of young children, and a lot of them are, or a lot of young, young adults, I would say, uh, in high school and in university. They're all doing the

Sania: 43:39

same

Hamza: 43:40

stuff as I was. And they're all part of MSAs and they come to me with hurdles or issues, uh, that their parents are not aware of. Obviously, I'm a little younger, so they, they take to me for whatever reason and they, you know, so I'm exposed to like a lot of different things and I'm confused sometimes, you know,

Sania: 43:56

as your kids get in high school, you're gonna get more and more scared. Well, yeah. Yes. You still have a little bit

Hamza: 43:59

of time. I, I agree. But, you know, uh, Initially I used to get very confused and be like, okay, like, you know, like what, you know, like what is going on. But now, you know, I kind of, uh, understand you know, how the world operates and you know, kids will be kids.

Sania: 44:13

This shows how much more pure you are. But you came from Dubai, so No, wait, just kidding. Dubai's pretty

Hamza: 44:18

crazy too. So Dubai is pretty crazy. But at our time, what was different is we didn't have social media. Mm-hmm. we didn't have Facebook, we didn't have access to our phones the way we do today. You know, today, like my kids are eleven, twelve, thirteen, they have phones for security reasons. Like I can't trust them to go to school and something not happen. So you have to keep your phone on you, even though it's not allowed. You know, the schools are like, don't put, don't bring phones. And we're like, no, take the phone. You know, forget what school says. Um, and so, you know, the world is just a completely different place. Everything is at a, you know, flick of a button or a switch or whatever it is. And uh, you know, we didn't have that growing up, so I think I was probably the last generation that had that raw. uh, no exposure. You know, like I had exposure, but it was exposure that I had to like, go and make, like, do you know what I mean? Social

Sania: 45:09

media started when I was in high, like Facebook Zenga, that started in my high school. So for me it was interesting cuz I got a very pure childhood. But, you know, you got, you got that in high school, but, you know, uh, just like Gary V says, Social media is not a bad thing. Social media exemplifies who you are. It exemplifies, you know who you already are. And so, I mean, you can, it can be used as a tool of good and it can be used as a tool of evil. And never before have we had this much access to knowledge. Yep. To information. And it's truly what a time to be alive, to connect with people from different, I've made all of my best friends through social media. I've met the most insane people. I have traveled the world and met people because of social media. Yeah. This podcast is happening because of social media. Exactly. And so I am a proponent that it can be used for a lot of good. We shouldn't just, you know, a lot of, I have some friends that are like, oh my God, it's such a just. It bad tool. Like it's just such a evil sinful, like, just put it away. We don't want it. And I'm like, you know what? I don't know what's on your F Y P. I have bunnies and goats running around. I'm pretty happy with social media. So I mean, it is what you make of it. And truly, again, like I said, I had to purify my intention for a long time with social media. I wanted to just be somebody that was my ego and it was very self-serving. And the followers and the subscribers, it really feeds what it feeds the ego. And just recently I'm learning to really humble myself and say, okay, let's take you out of it. Uh, for me in some form, in some way. I can also see what I'm doing as a modern day. You see this super chill like funny Muslim family. That talks about very real relatable stuff and it can show you that we are human just like everyone else because, you know, don't forget, we also grew up in Post nine 11 America. I was a child, I was in fifth grade when that happened. So that being said, for me, I think the representation and also now wearing a hijab on social media can help humanize the religion that I love so dearly. Um, and be used for a greater good to also, you know, for humanitarian efforts for some modern Um, and also for speaking up about certain things like mental health or things in our society such as like, you know, relations with in-laws and like the struggles of entrepreneurship and just all these things that people don't talk about.

Hamza: 47:39

Yeah. And that's real life. Yep. Uh, that's real life. So you, you mentioned something that I am really not aware of cuz I didn't grow up here. Right. And you said, uh, post nine 11 America. and could you elaborate on that? How did that mold or shape your life, if at

Sania: 47:56

all? It, it definitely shaped everyone's life. I mean, I was in fifth grade when it happened, and of course we started the war, uh, with Afghanistan like shortly after, and it was. it was a little bit of a scary time. There was racism, there was a lot of terrorist jokes. There was a lot of, oh, do you have a bomb in your backpack? There was a lot of distrust. Um, I still remember my neighbor, who I would play with, he was a white kid and he started to make a lot of those jokes after that, oh, you're a terrorist, blah, blah, blah. And you know, was on the bus stop with him. So I got to hear a good dose of that. Um, but you know, that really shapes you because you start to feel scared to even talk about religion or start to really put the label, I am Muslim on yourself. Because people start to see you as the other. They didn't know. They didn't understand, they didn't know what jihad actually meant. They were just putting these labels on Muslims and you get caught in the crossfire. So I remember when I first started to wear hijab, my dad was really not happy cuz he just didn't want anything to happen to me. And he was just afraid it came from a place of fear. Um, now he's extremely supportive and, and that's fine. And my mom wears hijab. Uh, she actually started pretty recently as well. And, um, Now life is very different. It is very different now. For example, when I wore a hijab, um, I was like, oh, all my non-Muslim followers are just gonna leave. I was certain of it. They are the most supportive of my hijab, you know, who's not supportive? The actual Muslims. I

Hamza: 49:29

wanted to get to that. Yeah, I wanted to get to that after, you know, uh, after you answered this question. But, uh, since you mentioned it, let's talk about that for a second, because I, as a content creator, also get the bulk of my hate, uh, through my own.

Sania: 49:42

I don't know what, uh, I, I'm gonna have to say like, you know what, if any, please just like take this section and put it on social media and like amplify it. Dear Muslim TikTok, you are the most toxic piece of the Why Why do you just shit on everybody all day long? Like whether you're a revert or an entrepreneur or just a Muslim content creator. People are constantly just bashing each other in like a holier than thou, oh, this is not right. That's not right. This is not right. Like my friend, you are on a music app. It was formally called Musically Check your holier than Thou status at the door before you open this app. And like, I don't understand that cuz I've never been the kind of Muslim who's like, oh my God, look what they're doing. Like no man, they might be wearing a miniskirt, but their heart is more pure than yours and you could be wearing like a full abaya. So like let's not judge each other on like the superficial, only God can judge each other's hearts. But I do hope that Muslim TikTok realizes. you are silencing people who want to even identify as Muslims on the app. Number two, I have seen multiple reverts in tears on the app because they've been bullied so much. You are pushing new reverts away from Islam who have literally no other community, and that is extremely, extremely toxic and it's hypocritical. And the hypocrisy is really more than anything, I'm worried for your soul because the hypocrisy itself is such a, such a lethal sin. Let's be careful of what we do and say to others. And so I really hope that that one thing I can do is to advocate one for, um, you know, just a more supportive online Muslim community. Yeah, it's

Hamza: 51:27

interesting you say that because um, I, you know, of course I'm in real estate, you know, I invest and there's a lot of different things that go on, uh, in the world of real estate that are considered, you know, maybe not religious or whatever. Um, and every time, of course this is way back when, cuz I don't actually manage my content anymore, but when I did, every time I would get hate, every time I would go look at that person and their profile or whatever, uh, you would, you would really get to learn a lot about that person just by looking at their profile and who they follow and what they're doing and, you know, um, and in most cases it would be a baseless claim or, uh, you know, somewhere where they should probably look at improving themselves before commenting on others. Exactly like what you said. Very

Sania: 52:09

toxic. Yeah. Um, it is very toxic. And if we're gonna get even further unfiltered, they like to, like silence people a lot. So I'm gonna just use one example here. Um, I recently made a video following a trend saying that my husband and I waited to have sex until marriage. Oh my God. God forbid a Muslim woman. Talk about sex. First off, I didn't say anything wrong, right? Like we were following a trend where a lot of people shared, like when, you know, and I said, you know what? In a, in a world where I'm hearing a lot of people didn't wait. I just wanted to, and no judgment to those who didn't wait. I wanted to share that we waited and we were very, I, well, I waited and we were very happy about that. And, and that was very, very important for me to like say that and to share that. And I got like, I think that vi that video is like almost at 5 million views of just people saying, sister, you are going to hell. And I'm like, I've seen, I've seen male cre, I've seen male Muslim creators talk about this, that you should wait till you're married or that they, I've seen religious scholars talk about it, but God forbid a woman talk about. you should go read. If you want some comedy tonight, go read my comments section.

Hamza: 53:23

I'm gonna, I'm gonna go check Zara, we need to check that, uh, comment section out. Yeah, we need to attack 'em all.

Sania: 53:27

It was, it was intense, the amount of hatred. And so I'm actually thinking that one angle of my content's gonna be talking about these things that they refuse to let women talk about. Let's talk about our periods more. Let's talk about sex more. This is human things that you guys keep saying. Like we sh like are you a 12 year old? We should be allowed to talk about these things. Of course. I mean, look,

Hamza: 53:47

if, if we can talk about 'em, anybody should be able to talk about 'em. Not only that, if being unfiltered is truly what brings you joy, then that's what you should do regardless of what

Sania: 53:57

people think. Yeah, I think that that is one area that I might be leaning more into just because it's not talked about. You literally tell Muslim girls, Hey, wait till you're married, but don't you never talk about it. You can't even think about it. Oh God, blah, blah, blah. And then all of a sudden you're supposed to be like a freak when you get married. Like, no, that's not how life works. And I do wanna start more open conversations around these subjects cuz they matter. They do matter. And again, seeing that representation is essential for, for people. So I'm gonna continue to push the boundaries of talking about personal things as well as mental health and relationships and life and just entrepreneurship. Every aspect of my life, I'm gonna continue to do so transparently. And I've actually just, um, Done two things, which is one created a Facebook group as well as a podcast called Safe Space with Sonya kk. This is a private Facebook group where a g the minute someone leaves hate, they're kicked out of the group. We can talk about our life, our issues, we can talk about our feelings, what we're, what we're going through, what questions we have. It's a free zone you can post anonymously. Um, it's the only place that I plan on going live. I don't go live on TikTok because they banned me cuz they thought I was underage. Um, even though I proved several times that I was not. Um, and you know, so that I've created this space now to continue to have these important conversations.

Hamza: 55:22

So important conversations of course, I think are key because you brought up something that's, I, I think very important where you're expected to know nothing. And then you're supposed to be a freak. And then h how does that happen if you like, know nothing? Right. And that, that's kind of where you need like a safe space. Uh, and these are things that matter. They're important.

Sania: 55:42

Uh, they do matter. Yeah. So safe space with Sonya kil G is just like a, it's not, it's just like all subjects. It's like whatever you wanna talk about, we can talk about there. Um, and what do people

Hamza: 55:52

talk to you about? Like, let's say somebody wanted to talk to you. What are general topics that people like, want, need safe spaces

Sania: 55:57

for? Without giving, you know, anyone's personal information away. People talk about like their marriages or their dreams, their goals, their financial hardships. They talk about their hardships with their parents or things that they're going through, um, or their dreams to go, you know, just everyday things or just their mental health struggles or their struggles to conceive or their struggles during pregnancy. Really just human things. You see a mixture of men and women in there and it's such a supportive community. I think like literally we're almost at like 500 members and I just started it like just a few weeks ago. And it's really become one of the most rewarding aspects of my work is to create this, um, this place for people. And you know, I think especially like when I was younger, I didn't have anybody to go to to talk about like, Hey, I'm experiencing mental health issues. You know, it was like, oh, you don't talk about it. You just, you know, you don't talk about it. It's

Hamza: 56:52

interesting you bring that up. Does that even exist in our cultures? Like, if I were to go, like, you know, the way I look at it or the way I think about it, if I went to my parents and said, oh, I'm, I have mental issues, they just tell me to like, you know, just go to sleep. It'll be fine

Sania: 57:05

tomorrow. Yeah. I got a lot of that in the beginning. Um, my parents were like, just pray, you're fine. Everything's okay. You're overthinking. And then, well, borderline personality disorder is pretty severe. It was actually, you know, even rated the number one most difficult disorder to live with. Um, just to give you guys a little bit of insight, it can go from like happy, like the happiest person you've ever met to like literally suicidal in a few hours. And, um, it's scary because it's like you get in such a bad place. Um, You know, and you, I wish I could be as unfiltered as I wanted because one time I showed a footage of what my house looked like after a panic attack, and instantly I had to remove it because as a mom, people were like, well, we're gonna call CPS on you if you show your, uh, the fact that you threw a watermelon on the ground because you were having a panic attack. I'm like, my kid wasn't even at home. But okay. So I, in that sense, that's the only place I'll be a little bit filtered now because you don't, you don't mess with my kid. My kid is my everything, my heart and. But I wish people could see what it's like to live with a serious mental illness. Not a moderate, but a serious one. Um, and my family eventually recognized that we cannot keep denying that this is a very real issue and one that has a cure, which I recently found through the D B T Center of Houston, uh, dialectical behavior therapy. And if we continue to say it's not real, it's not, it's not gonna help anything by acknowledging it's real, we can get the help and the resources that we need to resolve this. And for me to even get the correct diagnosis that I have today was a journey in itself of like 15 years because people don't talk about B P D. So how are you supposed to know you have it? Um, and especially immigrants and also even within the mental health community, B p D is stigmatized. You're, it's labeled as like you're the villain because you can go from like being someone's best friend to literally hating their guts. in just like the span of a few minutes. It's like, it's really hard to explain and everyone's BPD is a little different, but my b p d, that's how it goes. It's like you go from zero to a hundred real fast, there's no gray area, there's no in between. Everything you feel is just so extreme. And so, um, even like, I remember I told, I brought it up with my psychiatrist. I was like, Hey, I think I might have borderline personality disorder based off of my research. And he's like, oh, no, don't worry. You're not that crazy. And that will never leave me because I realized later on, like that was so invalidating. And that was just, and this is a professional, this was a ridiculous. And then a who, a friend who I had at that time, uh, you know who you are, was actually a licensed psychiatrist. And she, as soon as I told her I had this diagnosis, she just like went quiet. And she's like, that's a tough one. And she just nods her head and then, Started to like cut me out and like all the friends I'd introduced her was like hanging out with them, cut me out, all of that good stuff, all that fun, fun community stuff. But anyway, um, after I called her out on it, um, she actually went on social media and said, Hey, just so you guys know, Sonya is absolutely crazy. She talks about mental health all the time. She has this diagnosis, like she's crazy. And for me that was like really, really a slap in the face for a licensed psychiatrist to use your disorder against you to justify their bullying. And so that's a rant for another time. But there is a lot of stigma against mental health to this day. Not only within our community, but even within this mental health community. So, um, a lot of my work online is designed to really normalize that conversation. Provide resources, provide support for people, showcase my journey, what worked, what didn't work?

Hamza: 1:01:01

So what's working in your case and what's

Sania: 1:01:03

not working? Yeah. So, um, D B T therapy was one of the most life changing things I've ever done. I did an outpatient program. I actually just did finish the three month program for that, uh, which was very, very rewarding. It was basically like going to a class every day to learn how to live with b p d. It was fantastic. It was so many tools that I have now that I, I wouldn't have had. And I, for so long, I resisted it. I was like, I'm not that. I'm not a psycho, I'm not gonna go do this. And then I did it and I'm like, that was fantastic. Every person, whether you're neurotypical or not, could like benefit from that. Um, number two, medication has helped. However, medication also comes with a series of side effects. So I'm, I'm dealing with insomnia right now and, uh, teeth grinding as a result of the medication. But as for my b p d, it's helped tremendously. So a combination of medication, D B T therapy and meditation and prayer have been absolutely life-changing for me. A lot of people would, B p D cannot even be married. Like they can't sustain friendships or jobs a lot. I'm not, a lot of people can, there's, you know, there's a huge, it's a spectrum variety of us, us, there's a huge spectrum of us, but I can confidently say without all these resources, plus the support of my family. um, the support of a phenomenal husband. Um, my husband is so patient with this and a true testament of how deeply he loves because it is truly one of the most difficult things in the world. To be married to someone with borderline personality disorder that can go from worshiping you one second to like literally wanting to leave you the next, it's hard. It's a rollercoaster. And we didn't understand why this was happening to us. I was like, I love you so much and you love me so much, so why are we having so many problems? And I didn't realize it until I got the diagnosis and I was like, now everything makes sense. And not just like me learning, but one thing that's absolutely changed my life is my husband learning more about my mental health issues in my family, learning as much as they can because in learning, when I'm having an episode, they can remind me, Hey, remember we learned about this. This will help you. And even when I'm in not estate to help myself, they can help me. And so, That's been really, really, really beneficial for me. And how's your family handling it? Um, it's, it's hard when you love someone who's has a mental illness, that's a long term. It is very difficult. They know that my heart is so pure, but sometimes my words and my actions, it's like when you're dealing with a toddler, but in an adult's body, like your emotions, you're like, you're throwing this tantrum. Like, what is going on? This doesn't fit the situation. What is going on? Um, I'm definitely the most needy child. Like all of my siblings. Like I, I'm like a baby still with my parents. Like I need their love. I talk to them about everything. I see them all the time. Sometimes they, they're like, you're the oldest, but you act like the baby of the family. And I'm like, I know. I wish I could be like the exemplary older sister that most people are the stereotypical, but that's just not me. It's hard. They have seen me. they've seen me through a lot. They've worried about whether or not, you know, I was gonna stay alive at a certain point. Um, they've had to worry about that. They've had to worry about if one day my husband's gonna wake up and say, Hey, I can't do this anymore. They've had to worry about if my kid's gonna get taken away from me because my husband decides to leave me because I'm not healthy. These are all things that they've had to worry about, which is hard to see your daughter go through. But again, with the support of every single member of my family, um, you know, including my sister-in-law and my brother-in-law, and especially my husband, I'm living a really beautiful life. And yeah, I mean, life would be like much easier if I wasn't ill, but maybe I was put through this test for a reason and I have to hold faith onto that. And by talking about my struggles on social media with mental health, it helps me cope with the fact that I even have it. Yeah. I think you're

Hamza: 1:05:05

breaking a lot of barriers, um, by talking about things that really nobody else is talking about. Right. Like you mentioned, you know, you, you were in a bad place with your husband, which is now good. Um, you know, you, you were diagnosed with, uh, you know, b p d and then how your family, uh, initially, you know, maybe even refuse to recognize it. But then at a later point we're like, okay, we need to like really deal with this. And now you have this beautiful journey, you have this beautiful life, you have this beautiful following, um, and you're going through continued education, you said towards more towards religion to use on your platform.

Sania: 1:05:41

Uh, yeah. I mean, it's not like a happily ever after. I'm not gonna lie, living with b p D is like a daily struggle. It is. Some days are great, some days are like, how do I make it to tomorrow? Um, but I'm learning. I'm learning how to manage it, and I'm learning to be grateful. And, you know, at the end of the day, I can still zoom out and I have. The most beautiful life I really do. And this illness is not gonna take that away from me.

Hamza: 1:06:09

Yeah, absolutely. Uh, that's determination right there. Yeah. And you know, you take it one day at a time and you know, in Charlotte will, uh, it'll get you to wherever you need to go. So, you know, that's a tough one. That's a tough one to follow up on. Uh, the fact that you said this is a daily struggle, really, you know, uh, really speaks volumes, uh, and really takes a lot of determination to get over.

Sania: 1:06:33

Yeah. I was actually just thinking about it last night and I was like, you know, for me to be happy takes so much hard work. You tell someone that I work so hard to be happy every day. I have to teach. I have read books on happiness. I've taken courses on happiness. I have, you know, done everything. Yoga, meditation, whatever, follow your passion. I have had everything. And still happiness can be so difficult. And it's okay. It's okay if you feel that way. And one thing that was very interesting, as I get deeper into religion, someone told me, look at how many times the word happiness is mentioned in the Quran versus peace. And this life is not even really meant to be a place of happiness. This life is meant to be a test. But the best we can do is try to find some peace within it. And hope. Pray for peace in the eternal, peace in the in the hereafter. And so, you know, just holding onto that, that okay and a lot of things about me. W I wouldn't even be me if I didn't have this disorder. And there's a lot that I do love about myself. You know, there's a lot that, you know, the way that I am so unfiltered. Maybe that's a side effect of the illness. Like how, like it's really hard to, like, there have been rooms that I've walked into where people have given me such dirty looks. And talked so much shit. Okay. They've talked so much like to be on TikTok, to be on social media, especially as a Muslim to, especially as a sie, you get so much crap talked about you, it's not even funny. And to have armor against that just being like, I don't care. That's probably coming from that b p d. So

Hamza: 1:08:16

let's talk about that. A lot of hate, uh, in rooms that you walk in because you're a content creator versus like, what, being an engineer, lawyer, doctor, like, what is the stigma there?

Sania: 1:08:26

Um, it's not the stigma of being a content creator, it's just the fact that like people will, like, just with your content, I mean, what are you gonna hate on this man is teaching you how to invest. Like literally why are you mad? Um, and people will just find whatever reason to put others down. I've gotten hate for literally everything. Like there are some video as soon as a video goes viral. I know not to check my comment section after that because that's when you get some really intense like, oh my God. I posted like my brother loves my kid. Very wholesome. Right? My mo, one of my most viral videos, 30 million Views, is my brother came to hang out with my daughter. So he went to go pick her up from school and he went and he's like, he called me, like he told me right then and there, Hey, I'm gonna go take her home. Then he just like bust her out of preschool. So many people were like, he's a predator. He's a predator, he's a predator. How did you let him stay with your kid like that? And I'm like, bro, just cuz your family is disgusting doesn't mean that mine is okay. Like this is just an uncle that like truly is obsessed with his niece. And by the way, what you didn't see is his wife was right outside in the car with him and they took Lily for ice cream, him and his wife. So like chill al people are crazy.

Hamza: 1:09:40

And I feel like there's no cultural awareness maybe around how tight-knit, uh, immigrant families

Sania: 1:09:46

generally are. I think it's beautiful how tight-knit immigrant families are and. It was just, it was just so strange for people to see how much my sister and my husband, like, there have been people who were like, oh, he's the real father. I'm like, that is literally, I mean, my u my video's going viral right now. And people are like, literally like, oh, he must be the real dad. She just knows. And I'm like, that's freaking disgusting. But like, also like people will find anything to hate on. Like, what are you gonna hate on with a little kid being loved by her family, they will find, oh, she's gonna be so spoiled. She's gonna act like the world revolves around her. I mean, it's partly true. She partly does act like that, but Okay. Um, but, you know, um, and like I said, if I ever talk about religion, it's the Muslims that come at me. Um, if I talk about like, oh my God, on so many of my videos, if I ever post a cute video with my husband, I hope he leaves you. When are you guys gonna get a divorce? Oh my God. Like there's so much hate, like, What is wrong with people? And it's enough to make, it's enough to break a lot of people down. And a lot of people have left social media as a result. They can't. It's too much. And I'm just, I don't know. Something about me is broken. I think I, I really don't care. I just think it's so funny. Like someone the other day was like, oh my God, you're so ugly and that's why you need these filters. I'm like, bro, not everyone can wake up beautiful. You know, like I'll joke back at them cuz I just don't, it doesn't get to me. So the only time I've ever been shook is when people have ever accused me of not being a good mom. That has happened to a lot of mom talk creators, a lot of mom creators. Oh, we're gonna call CPS on you. Like for anything and everything, like literally anything. That's the only time I've ever been like scared. Like that's the only threat you can make. That makes me. Pause in my tracks for a second cuz I know if there's one good thing in this life, I'm a good mom. And so that's again, the only, only hate comments that have ever gotten to me. How far does

Hamza: 1:11:44

the hate go? Is it just the comments?

Sania: 1:11:46

I've been feeling it in real life actually too. I went to a party the other day and um, these guys were standing behind me and like loudly kept talking about how much they hate content creators who share their whole life. And at first I thought it was Lee were just literally talking, but then they kept talking about it and like louder and louder and I was like, okay, I understand I'm still gonna take a picture of my food before I eat it. So, um, You know, I, I do get, uh, I have lost a lot of friends over it. Um, actually when I first got, uh, blew up on TikTok, all of my immediate friends were talking trash. Um, all of my immediate friends, uh, like the, the ones I referenced that were doctors and stuff, um, and they all stopped talking to me after that. So that was a very jarring experience cuz like, you think your friends would be happy for you, but a lot of times they actually aren't. And so I'm sure you have experienced that with your own growth coming here, coming to America being so wildly successful beyond what most people can ever imagine. You know, you, you have a beautiful family of your own. I'm sure you get a lot of people where the jealousy consumes them and they cannot. And it's, it makes me sad for them more than anything

Hamza: 1:13:00

else. So, it's funny you say that because for me, um, most of my friends today, uh, are actually from back home. and we have a WhatsApp group, and they're either from high school or from university. And those are the people that are my, like immediate friends. Mm-hmm. And the interesting part is a lot of them are immigrating. So as they come here, we've built like a small, almost like a support system within ourselves. That's amazing. I find it actually very difficult to make

Sania: 1:13:26

friends here. That's very, your experience is very rare. Right? It's what a blessing that is because a lot of entrepreneurs discuss when they make it, when they finally, um, I know my dad's, my dad saw a lot of this. Um, when you start to make it, um, a lot of people are just, will make you feel small. But if you have those friends that have been genuine your entire life, hold onto them close and, and speak to your character too. I'm

Hamza: 1:13:53

a little older maybe than you are, so, you know, we go back quite a bit. Uh, and uh, and it's just very interesting to see that dynamic. Uh, Every time someone comes here, we all group together, you know, we go visit them or they come visit us. So I have friends who've actually stayed over at my house here in Sugarland cuz they just moved to the us. They're looking for like, you know, something or an opportunity or starting a business or whatever it is. Um, and so we get to spend time. And the funny thing is, me and my wife went to the same high school, well middle school, but you're better than I was high school and then university. Uh, and then we started dating in university. We're not gonna get into that. Um, and then we got eventually married. Uh, so believe it or not, like my family doesn't know a life without my wife now because we've been together for so long. We've been together for like 20 years now.

Sania: 1:14:40

That's so beautiful. Yeah. May God protect your marriage, your family, but it's beautiful when you can preserve those relationships. And I do have some friends all the way from like, when I was younger, um, and from middle school, from high school, every period of my life from college. My best friends are from college. Um, and the ones now. Um, but you know, along the way I have lost several people as well too. And I'm not trying to, you know, play the card. Did

Hamza: 1:15:06

you cut 'em out or did they like, did they, you know, were they like just not there

Sania: 1:15:12

for you? Um, I think in, uh, post TikTok, like when I started getting bigger, it was just that they were talking so poorly about me when I wasn't there. And one time I was actually just in the other room and they thought I had gone hiking with the boys. We were all on vacation and they were just talking nonstop about me. And they don't know that, they actually don't know that I know this, but that's when I was like, I can't do this anymore. And so I, I did cut 'em off. But, you know, not to play, you know, not to paint myself in a beautiful light because I own when I'm wrong too. Being friends with someone with borderline personality disorder can also be very difficult because we are very sensitive, you know, a person, ha, I can't, I can't have a friend who talks poorly about me when I'm not there, otherwise I don't feel safe around you. Maybe another person, a healthier person, could have been like, just addressed it and been like, Hey, this hurt when you did this, blah, blah, blah. I couldn't, I reacted very, very, uh, fiercely and so, As an adult now I have, well, right now I have like really fantastic friends. I have to say, I am in the best place I've ever been in my life with friends. And I, I think I only look for one thing, which is, do you make me feel safe? I don't care what race you are, what religion you are, even what age you are. I just do you make me feel safe. That's it. And can I make you feel safe? And that's been the basis of all my relationships now, and it's been really great.

Hamza: 1:16:33

I think the world's come to a point where, or at least I feel like for you, maybe it's come to a point where as long as they're like, you know, uh, transparent, you know, well, wishing, uh, open-hearted, that's kind of what you're looking for. Which is I think what any anybody would be looking for in a friend. Yeah.

Sania: 1:16:51

Or just some people that I can just be very real with. Um, just, you know, like creating my safe space offline. Um, so that, it's been great. I've met a lot of my, my friends through social media. I'm the kind of person where people will DM me, be like, Hey, we'd love to meet you. We just moved to Houston, and I'm like, great. Come through. And just like you, I do welcome a lot of people. I love this city. I truly do. Was born and raised in Houston. I love this city and so I love showing people around. I love getting people like really, really situated here because a lot of times all it takes is just meeting the right few people and then it be, feels, starts feeling like home. And so I do that as well.

Hamza: 1:17:31

And how's your husband with that? Is he also, is he an introvert? Is he an extrovert? What is, what is that combination like with you guys? You

Sania: 1:17:40

know, he's, so, in high school he was like really popular and I always assumed he was an extrovert. And then when we got together, he told me he was an introvert and I didn't believe him for the longest time. Um, but my husband is, and this is actually the quality that I love most about my husband, he is the best friend a person could ever in their life have. Um, and just last week he. this is also gonna make me cry. He went to his friend's grave and just prayed for him. Um, uh, one of his best friends. And this is not just the friend who's gonna be there with for you in the good times, even after you pass away, he will be at your grave and he will be praying for you. And so, um, he doesn't have a lot of friends. He has very few friends. He can count him on one hand, but the friends that he has, he will go to the ends of the world for you. Yeah. And it's really the most beautiful thing in the world. Deepest connections. Yes. But it sometimes pisses me off cuz I like want him to meet new people and he's like, I'm just really

Hamza: 1:18:36

comfortable. Yeah. I mean, look, um, I can tell you I probably hear, uh, outside of my like core friend circle that came from abroad. Um, probably have a handful of friends that I can sit down and have a conversation with. And it can be like a deep, meaningful conversation. And I think it comes to a point where you're not really looking for anything more in life. Um, as far as friendships. Like you, you have what you, you know, you have what you have and you can have all the conversations in the world and get everything out there with these handful of people. Um, at that point, more people just become sort of like a, almost like a, you know, uh, it's not

Sania: 1:19:13

necessary. Yeah. My husband's friends, a lot of them he's had since high school. I think it's also a male thing. They like, they, yeah. Those are the times. my brothers, same way. Both my brothers, uh, all the guys I know actually they, they find their friends early and they just keep 'em their whole life. Um, so he, he has a really hard time letting new people in. I am extremely extroverted. Like, like the complete egg. My, it's funny cuz my daughter is an introvert, which is so funny to me because it's like, I was like, I don't know how to raise you. Like I don't know what to do. I don't know how to raise an introvert, but, um, Yeah. I'm at that point now where I'm, I'm really see, uh, I tell my friends, one thing that's been interesting, especially now that I'm in my thirties, is like I tell my friends now how much I love them all the time, all the time. And I deeply do like, I really love them. And it's like, it's not like even friends anymore. It's truly like, you are the sister that I've chosen, you know, not the one I was born with, but I chose you. You're my family. And once you get to that point in a lot of your friendships, I mean, nothing comparison.

Hamza: 1:20:25

Are you the same person on camera and in real life? I

Sania: 1:20:28

don't know. You

Hamza: 1:20:29

guys tell me. So the reason I bring that up is because you're, you're saying all these things, they feel so real, you know, they don't feel like you, they don't feel any different than what we see through a lens. Like for example, in my case, I'm a completely different person on camera than I am in real life, you know? And people sometimes will sit down and talk to me and they're like, you know, we didn't actually expect you to be like this. But in your case, I feel like there's such a, uh, similarity that it's literally the same person.

Sania: 1:20:54

Yeah. It's, um, I tell people all the time, like people, like I think right when I was outside, someone came up to me and started talking to me, that was following me, and there's no difference. In fact, I joke that if you follow me on social media, you know me better than my husband does because he doesn't have social media and he doesn't watch my tos. And if you watch my tos, you know, literally play by play every detail of my life. Um, back in the day, like one TikTok was taking off, I would post up to like five to six pieces of content per day on that platform, which now to me feels very insane. But it is why I'm at where I'm at now with it. It literally play by play. You were seeing every aspect of my life, and it was such a creative challenge to take. Like, I never woke up and was like, okay, I, I have all of this scheduled out. No. Literally every day I wake up and I'm like, okay, the story will come, the video will come to me. It's like such a hippie way of making content. But um, yeah, like people who see me on social media genuinely know everything there is to know about me so people know if they like me or hate me before they even meet me. And when I go outside, like I have felt people who just like instantly disliked me That's fine. Or instantly wanted to be my best friend. Great. Like it, I have, uh, received that. Yeah. Anything

Hamza: 1:22:15

you do in life, there's a 50 50 chance of, you know, you're gonna get the haters. You're gonna get the likers. Actually, believe it or not, I think the haters are more important for the algos than the people who actually like you.

Sania: 1:22:24

I love it when people fight in my comments section. It's like people have gotten into the most detailed debates. Like, I literally posted a video once where I made. Pasta and there was pizza and they said, why would you make pizza and pasta the same night? And I'm like, why not? I don't. There was a long debate, like literally that video got like, I think almost 1.5 billion views as well where people were just fighting over whether or not pizza and pasta should be placed at a dinner party together. I mean, why not? I don't under, I genuinely, that one still, like, I still don't know. Like they're both Italian. Like it's like salt and pepper. What's wrong with you guys?

Hamza: 1:23:02

Yeah, well I don't get it either. Well that's probably cuz I'm an immigrant. Like I don't actually understand like, you know what that is yet. I need to figure it out. So. let's talk about the video that I watched where I found you. Okay. And that was a video of a goat and it was basically your mom telling the goat to move away. Yeah, that's

Sania: 1:23:21

a good one.

Hamza: 1:23:22

Uh, and I was like, okay, this is interesting. Like, I've never seen anything. And the reason I think I got drawn to it is because in Dubai I'm used to seeing, or I was at the time, used to seeing like animals in homes, like exotic animals, you know? Um, and then that's kind of what drew me or took, you know, drew my attention. And I was like, hold on, wait a minute. This, this looks like a very Dubai style video. Um, and so let's go into that dynamic. What, what is it like with your family? With your pet, or, you know, I don't know. What, what do we refer to them as at this point?

Sania: 1:23:53

I don't know if you've seen the recent, have you seen the most recent video? Where my baby go? Jumped on my mom's lap? No, I haven't seen that one. Oh my god, you're behind. Okay. Oh, I have such good content. So my favorite videos are when my dad, my dad loves my goat. He can't stop smiling around my goat because they start play wrestling. They start play fighting. Like your dad and the goat? Yeah, my goat just gets on just her legs and she starts boxing. My dad, she starts trying to headbutt him and he just puts his hand out and pushes the good back. And it's so funny. I think that one is at like 17, 18 million right now too. And. That video's hilarious. So anyway, I brought home two baby goats and my mom just came the other day and she was wanting to meet them, but the baby goat's very friendly and jumped on her lap and she like almost, she actually almost started crying. She was like, please. And then Um, yeah, it was hilarious. And I have like videos of like back when Jojo was alive, my mom, or like my family playing with jojo and my daughter got so jealous cuz she's used to being the baby of the family and she saw this animal in diapers and she thought she got a new sibling. And they were like, why? She was like, why are you not giving me attention? And she would just start crying and it was so funny. So everyone has like their unique relationship with the animals. I'm definitely the one. loves animals the most in my family. Like nobody else has any pets, um, or ever intends to have any pets. My mom does not like animals. She's terrified to death, which is so funny that I'm her daughter because she likes tried to teach me to be scared of animals my entire life didn't work, didn't work. I, the programming was just not working. Like I am who I am. Uh, my daughter does love animals, but my goats like to headbut her. And so, you know, she gets a little mad. Um, she tried to potty train them. It didn't work. She got upset about that too. Your daughter

Hamza: 1:25:50

tried

Sania: 1:25:50

to potty train goats? Yeah. She gets really mad when they don't use the potty, and I'm like, uh, it's a goat. So what's

Hamza: 1:25:55

that like? Do, uh, it because they're in the house sometimes they're

Sania: 1:25:58

always in the house because they know how to open doors. They can open a door in three seconds. So, God forgive forbid I ever, like, I've had to put like three locks, um, to get in. Um, One of my most viral videos also is everyone was praying, uh, like Jamal's style and the goat entered the house. So they said somebody was hungry and they were praying for dinner So that was, uh, that was a really entertaining video. But, um, my daughter's an only child and I, and the reason she's an only child is because of my borderline personality disorder. You know, there's days where I'm just not even able to get out of bed and my husband can't handle two, he can handle one, but two is very hard. Uh, when you're also working, uh, some intense, um, you know, have an intense career and a farm to take care of and a wife and also happens to be the better cook in the family. So, you know, I get it. But for me, as someone who's very loving part of the animals is that, you know, I'm coping with the fact that I only have one child, but I have a lot more love to give and, um, in a way, these are my daughter's siblings. And she actually refers to them. It was really cute. She actually refers to them as her brothers and sisters. She grew up with the, the kangaroo. They both shared diapers and bottles, like they both got bottles at the same time. She feeds the goat, the bottle, now she calls them brother It's like really cute. So, you know, I can't, maybe I can't give her a sibling, but at least she has no shortage of love in her life, that's

Hamza: 1:27:31

for sure. Yeah. So is your mom getting over the fear? No. No. Is that something that's in the

Sania: 1:27:37

works? No. you can't change this lady. She loves baby animals. Like she's okay when they're babies, but the minute they get a little bit bigger, she's like, game over for me. Yeah. She only ever loved my kangaroo. And so I'm telling you that animal was too pure for this world. Um, she loved Jojo. She loved her. And actually I've never seen her cry over an animal, um, other than jojo. So it, it was really, you know, that was the, that was, yeah.

Hamza: 1:28:06

All right, well, uh, we're getting close to the end here, and towards the end I always like to like address the future and what that's gonna be like. And so obviously you have this amazing platform you're looking at, you know, uh, continuing on with, you know, some further religious, uh, education and pursuing a lot of different things, you and your husband together. What is the next five years for you? What can we expect to see?

Sania: 1:28:32

So I'm 32 right now. Um, and I've al whenever I ask older people what was like the best time of your life, they always tell me their thirties always. So for me, the next few years, I just want to just be happy and love every minute of this life that we've created. You know, I'm trying to live in the present. I don't really care about, I have everything and more that I could ever want in my life. Maybe a second kid will see. Other than that, um, I have everything I could have ever wanted in this lifetime. So I think for me, the next five years are just truly just finding a little bit more stability. I heard that, um, with borderline personality disorder and bipolar after 35, it kind of peaks, so this is the hardest part. And then it starts to get a little bit better. Uh, the hormones start to like level out, the chemicals start to level out. So I'm really looking forward to that. But like I am so aware of the fact that I'm not gonna have my parents forever. Um, a lot of my friends have lost their parents recently and like I said, I'm very close to my family, so I just wanna enjoy. I constantly, every day I wake up, I remind myself. All of your loved ones are alive right now. Is that something you think about like every your parents do people not think about like, I think about it every day, really? That like, I'm not gonna have forever with them. Um, so every day I literally just wake up and I'm like, all of your loved ones are alive. Whether or not your mental health is good today, it's a good day cuz all the people that you love are here. And so right now I have all of everyone alive. I just want to enjoy them. And you're gonna see a lot of videos with my family cuz I wanna spend every minute of my life with them. Well, that's

Hamza: 1:30:20

awesome. Uh, look, it was really good. It was, it was, it was really good to get to know you, uh, Sonya, you know, amazing story, amazing journey. I'm looking forward to what you have in store for the future. And you're right. Look, one day at a time. Uh, and with that, thank you for coming and taking this, you know, uh, and enlightening me, I guess, uh, on your journey and, uh, and what life with, uh, you know, your family is like. Well,

Sania: 1:30:48

thank you. Thank you for having me here back in Sugarland, uh, where my roots are. So I appreciate it. And it was also nice meeting you.