Monster Monster
Welcome to Monster Monster! A live play table top role playing game podcast! We are currently running our second season of D&D 5th edition
Monster Monster
S02E16 - In Hot (Holy) Water
The world has changed forever. Purple fog hangs thick in the air as two planes of existence fight for dominance after Alyssum's defeat. Without sunlight, crops wither, society crumbles, and strange new threats emerge from the shadows.
Vance Ironside and Dolomir Sedrin find themselves outside the walls of Union City, the capital of the Oathmakers Coalition, searching for information about the dark entities that have invaded their reality. What was once a gleaming center of governance has descended into chaos in just one month—trash piles up in wealthy districts, tents line the streets, and crime runs rampant without consequence.
When they finally meet their contact, Balin Zenwish, they discover something far more terrifying than they anticipated. The spectral beings plaguing the city look like ordinary people but cause searing psychic pain with their touch. When defeated, they simply melt away, leaving no trace behind. Only radiant damage and holy water seem effective against them.
But the true horror reveals itself in the resistance headquarters beneath an abandoned bar. There, reunited with their old ally Essel, they make a chilling discovery: not only can these entities appear human, but they can perfectly impersonate people—even those who have existed for years before the dimensional merge. A simple test with holy water exposes infiltrators hiding among trusted friends, fundamentally changing everything they thought they knew about this new threat.
The dimensional collision hasn't just transformed the physical world; it's created a crisis of trust where nothing can be taken at face value. As our heroes plan their next move toward the mysterious magical concentration in the northeast district, they must now question every relationship and every face they encounter.
Who can you trust when darkness has not just fallen on the land, but potentially on the people closest to you?
Previously on Monster Monster. Alyssum has been defeated and darkness was thrust upon the world. Many secrets were discovered in the dark plane and now all of those secrets are exposed while the world handles two planes of existence battling for dominance. Hello everybody, welcome to Monster Monster. My name is Tyler Waltz and I am going to be your DM this evening. Welcome back, everybody. We had a pretty eventful last episode that completely shook up the whole plane of existence that we were on, and the two heroes that were most responsible for that are here today.
Speaker 2:We just made reality a little more spicy. We zhuzhed it up a little bit. Hey everybody, I'm Tyson Cox. I'm playing Vance Ironside, a good man, maybe torn between some different things, but he's out here doing good, mainly, mostly.
Speaker 1:And to my right.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and I'm Brian Petrie. I'm playing Dolomir Sedrin. He is a monk rogue. He is very good at stealing things and hopefully he will steal the show.
Speaker 1:Yep, ooh, look at that. I didn't know we were doing this like a let's make a date.
Speaker 2:I mean, you said, zhuzh it up.
Speaker 3:I put a little parsley on the side of the plate. I like it All right.
Speaker 1:Well, since so much happened last time, I've got a little bit of exposition for us. Imagine a pitch black screen, like when a movie starts, that just says one month later we open on a familiar site, our hero sitting at a campfire. It's dark, the air feels dense as what now feels familiar. At this purple fog, it lingers and it reminds them of the new blended realities that they are in ever since the dimensionsided. It's hard to tell what time it is, but they must venture forth. You two are sitting at a campfire. It's been one month since your previous adventure.
Speaker 1:You are no longer in Sol Deus, you are back in the Oathmakers Coalition. After everything went down, you know that the world is a completely different place and it's getting more stressful. There's been no sun, crops are starting to die, people are getting really worried about what the state of this dimension will even be. You made it back to the Oathmakers Coalition because you decided to regroup with Silva to find out where the rest of these dark entities are stationed. And that has led you here. Just outside the walls of these dark entities are stationed, and that has led you here just outside the walls of Union City Vance. You would recognize this city as essentially the capital, where there's the United States and we have Washington DC. This is the Coalition's Washington DC. This is where all of the little bits and pieces of the country meet together to decide who they're supporting, what's going on, grievances and stuff like that.
Speaker 2:It's the omc, the omc won't you run for me one time?
Speaker 2:anyways um yeah uh we leveled up, I took uh well, I actually was a little further behind than I should have been. So I just took three state levels in Cleric and with that I took Potent Spellcasting, which I get to add my wisdom modifier to damage you deal with any Cleric cantrip, which is good, and I also increased my dexterity. So that means I've just prayed a lot and did yoga, hey if it works, it works During this last month. I'm now no longer negative or breaking even.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's so wild that the magic that was released stops all cantrips. Isn't that kind of crazy that we're going into a new world with no cantrips?
Speaker 2:Yeah, that is wild. That's crazy to learn, because what's weird is actually. I took that other thing. That converts all cantrips to first level spells and my first level spells are now free as well.
Speaker 1:Yeah right, all righty Dolo you ready.
Speaker 3:My level is now. I'm taking two levels in rogue, so I'm going to go to three and one level in monk. I'm going to just switch up how I did that Cool, and the reason for that is because now I get a subclass in rogue which I've been wanting to get to, which is thief.
Speaker 1:Nice.
Speaker 3:And so that just plays better into my character. I'm going to be snatching stuff as much as possible.
Speaker 1:Right on Snatch people's souls.
Speaker 2:I'm going to take everything Run up and just take their chi Mm-hmm, Clog their chakras.
Speaker 1:It's going to be like oh, I'm having such a bad day. Yeah, just one of those. Be one of those. We, just, out of spite for the rest of the world, just do the like three pokes on somebody's body and they're just ruined for a month. Um, but with that we find ourself outside union city. You guys are at a campfire. You just camped out.
Speaker 1:Uh, the world is in a weird state. Where it was a civil war, it is almost put on hold because now there is darkness all over the land. They don't even know who to fight anymore. Who's to blame? So all of these countries are now dealing with their own internal conflicts instead of dealing with each other. At the moment, you, the last time that you met up with silva during this, during this time skip, you figured, since this was the land that you're most familiar with, this would be the easiest place to track down where the leader is. And you are sent here to meet balin zenwish and you have a brief description. He is a short elf with very pale skin and part of his left ear is missing. Your objective is to find him inside of union city and get his information on where more intel is suspected to be.
Speaker 2:Well, it's going to be hard considering how common the name Balin Zenlish is Right, if that's even his real name.
Speaker 1:If All right, maybe possible pseudonym, but yeah, Do you guys want to head into the city? Do you guys want to do some more prep? Everything seems to be here, with the exception Of Av. Av is not with you, but the cart is, which is weird because for the longest time I wrote in that she was basically Sewed into the cart For the sake of the story. So that's suspenseful, that's scary.
Speaker 3:So wait, does Balin dude shows up At the same time Av goes missing? No, so wait. This Balin dude shows up at the same time Avgo's missing.
Speaker 1:No, you guys haven't met Balin yet. He is inside the city. Your objective is to find him.
Speaker 3:Is to find him.
Speaker 2:Yeah, balin's the what, the big boss of this area.
Speaker 1:No, he's an informant for Silva.
Speaker 2:Oh.
Speaker 1:That's getting you the intel for where to find the big bad.
Speaker 2:Oh, my bad for where to find the big bad.
Speaker 1:Oh my bad. Yes, you guys are working together, because it's suspected that he is inside the capital.
Speaker 2:Excellent, and then do we have any idea where Balin might be at in general? No, so we were just told like in this city.
Speaker 1:It's more of one of those things where it's like go there and Balin will find you.
Speaker 2:Oh, okay, yeah, Well, you want to. I mean, we got to, he'll find us.
Speaker 1:Do you want to do the old naked dwarf trick? I don't know if anybody's ever said that.
Speaker 3:Oh, he's said it before. That's the problem. I was in a fraternity so we used to play.
Speaker 1:Pretty often that's what they told him it was. Yeah, because he was never in a fraternity. No, they just got him to do that stuff and told him that they'd give him a jacket.
Speaker 2:Well, they were in a fraternity and they said it would be pretty cool if I did it. So, like my transitive properties, I'm cool with a fraternity.
Speaker 3:Did you ever get your jacket?
Speaker 2:Well, I mean I asked but. But like, why would a naked dwarf have a jacket?
Speaker 3:that, that is solid logic, absolutely that is solid, I'm back on his side.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I was never not unfortunately all right for real.
Speaker 2:You want to check out some taverns where the skullduggery goes down, or uh, uh, yeah, actually I want to go.
Speaker 3:Let's find somewhere I can sell this damn amulet now that I don't need it anymore.
Speaker 1:All right, all right, I like how you say you don't need it, but it still has like magical properties. You just get rid of that. Bonuses for the money, because money is the ultimate magic.
Speaker 3:That's right, money is the ultimate power. I could buy something different that better plays to my character.
Speaker 1:It is true. It is true.
Speaker 2:Because I was kind of accidentally had that thrusted upon me.
Speaker 1:Yep, yeah you thrust it upon yourself. That's pretty true. He's like oh no, don't put that amulet on. No, it was like oh no, I'm gonna put this on me, otherwise, you know, you'll just have to take it from my corpse. Mid-sentence of hey, if you have that amulet you might want to be careful about oh, it's like a cartoon where it's like, yeah, these berries on this tree over there, and then in the background you see somebody eating them Incredibly poisonous, and then just the comedic like uh-oh.
Speaker 2:But with what I know about this city, I know that it was built on rock and roll. Where would I find the thieves district? Or like a fence, or somewhere like that?
Speaker 1:give me a history check with advantage, since this is your home country. 11, 11, all right, so just a flat 11 flat so you are.
Speaker 1:You're very familiar with the city, but you've never been here before, uh, so you would know that in the capital they try and keep things looking as nice as possible. So in order to get to some of the shady areas it's not going to be anywhere that the public really goes so, like your main strip where all your stores are, it's going to be your little coffee shops and all that's going to be great. But with this being the head of the government area, one might say a hive of scum and villainy. It gets pretty treacherous pretty quickly the further away from the center you get.
Speaker 2:You want to just get a beer, then yeah, I was going to say everyone in Indiana knows you don't go to Gary. Right or even more specific. You can make jokes about 38th Street in Fort Wayne. People go eh, that's bad, I was just assuming for a general area.
Speaker 1:Oh yes, just further away from the For a general area it's going to be the furthest place away from the Capitol Sweet. So when you go into the main entrance it's all going to look great because that's where people are seeing first and that leads to a straight main road. That leads to essentially the capitol building. Anything back behind that where the tourists probably don't go yeah is gonna be.
Speaker 3:Is gonna be where the as far as the light touches simba.
Speaker 2:I know a tavern called the elephant graveyard, so we should probably head that way.
Speaker 1:There all right, all right, look at that world building on the. So you make your way through the town and since you've never been here before, you were almost excited because you were like, oh, I get to finally see the capital, what it's like. I'm sure they've got good museums.
Speaker 2:Yeah, don't tell me what. No, it's not my character Filled with other people's shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:So you walk in and what was expected to be some grand entrance is now completely disheveled Like you walk in and even just after one month, the the bit of collapse that has settled into society is already showing, even in the wealthiest areas, to where you're starting to see trash pile up on the side of the road and you can still tell that it's nicer than some of the alleyways and stuff that you're passing. But even this like scourge or however you want to describe it, is affecting the wealthiest areas a lot of uh, a lot of tents on the side of the road nowadays.
Speaker 2:I believe it's called urban camping.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 1:That seems insulting. That's a weird way to phrase it.
Speaker 3:Yeah, you know, you just get out there and become one with nature.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's like my apartment's right there, but you know what this sidewalk?
Speaker 3:It's something about it. It's something about it.
Speaker 1:Urban camping sounds voluntary yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you know I, urban camping sounds voluntary, it sounds like urban camping. It's like bitch. I'm homeless, I have been misinformed. We all learn and grow.
Speaker 3:There's that one guy who's like I'm not. I just don't like paying rent here you brother.
Speaker 2:Here you brother.
Speaker 1:So you make it to the Capitol building and, to nobody's surprise, the capitol building is still in pristine condition, all things considered. And you start to make it to the, to the shadier area before all of this, and it is like you're just openly witnessing crime at this point, like you're walking through somebody just got like mugged. This one person is just kicking in a door. It's chaos right now and through all that chaos, there seems to be somebody who is very calm, cool and collected. Is it an elf missing part of their left ear? Well, you can't tell because they have a hood up right now, but at about the time that you make I can tell I'm looking.
Speaker 2:Is one lump a little bit shorter than the other.
Speaker 1:That's a solid point. Give me a perception check, I'll give you that one.
Speaker 2:Oh, that's going to be good dude 22.
Speaker 1:Okay, yeah, no, by God, you're right. Yeah, you were like what's up with this? Oh shit, that's probably a.
Speaker 3:You are very astute. How'd you figure that out?
Speaker 2:Shadows of the lumps.
Speaker 3:Shadows of the lumps. Is that a band?
Speaker 1:I imagine it's the meme with the lady with all the math equations being like what could cause a hood. It's not raining Ears.
Speaker 2:Ears. Just remember this.
Speaker 1:When I'm terrible at something I should be good at Remember this moment, a moment of clairvoyance. Just remember this.
Speaker 3:When I'm terrible at something, I should be good at yeah right, Remember this moment, A moment of clairvoyance, like I realize now. But yes, you were able to. Which ear do you think he's missing?
Speaker 1:left it's the right one no, no, it is the left one. Um, so you approach and, uh, he almost. He looks up and you start to see a scar on the whole bottom part of his mouth and he goes I see, pops, I get it, I see oh, yeah, those things will mess you up.
Speaker 1:Joker scars and he looks up and he goes welcome, gentlemen. How are you dealing with the state of the world that you kind of put everybody in and he's very jaded. He is immediately coming off as like this was like my area, my town, and it's already more of a shithole. He's not happy with it. He's not confrontational, but he's immediately in his tone. He is like we got to clean this mess up.
Speaker 3:I mean, look, man, you wanted property values to change. You got to do something right. You got to shake things up in the area. Well, most people assume property values changing in a positive direction, but uh, I mean, look at this, this real estate has gone down by over 30%. You can buy that tavern for probably half of what you would have paid for it last year.
Speaker 1:That lady, who do you think I am? She's ready to sell. You think I'm a real estate mogul?
Speaker 3:No, who are?
Speaker 1:you no. Well, I believe you already know who I am. He knows who you are apparently. I ain't never met you. No, neither one of you have met him before, from one elf to another.
Speaker 3:You're looking rough dog.
Speaker 1:Well it's been a rough last month. I don't know if you could tell by the state of there not being a son.
Speaker 3:I mean it's out there.
Speaker 1:I see we're dealing with an optimist here silver linings well, I wish that we were in a state to where I could agree with you. However, we do have a job to do, and he says follow me.
Speaker 2:Hey, you said there's a short elf, so am I looking him eye to eye?
Speaker 1:No, it's more of like a staircase between the three of you.
Speaker 3:A little evolution of Pokemon thing going on between the three of you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, evolution of pokemon thing going on. Yeah, yeah, um, and he leads you into the elephant. You said the elephant graveyard, we're just gonna roll with that the elephant graveyard bar and when you walk into this bar, you can tell that nobody's been here. You would probably guesstimate in about a month, maybe the first week, when everybody was just like, oh, like the world's ending better get completely plastered. But now it is completely run down.
Speaker 1:Hurricane parties yes exactly hurricane parties, and in that there's no other people here, it is literally just the two of you and him and he goes. Ah, gentlemen, I know I came off a bit rude there earlier. It's just upsetting seeing a town that I cared for, many of the people falling into dismay. I realize you had to do what you had to do and I am hoping that I can get this settled as quickly as possible. How much are you familiar with Union City?
Speaker 2:Who Either one of you really as this is all going on, Vance has made his way behind the bar and is just pouring himself, just making some drinks and whatnot.
Speaker 1:Okay, yeah you go behind. Give me a perception check 14. 14. So when you go behind the bar, everything is completely abandoned, like any beer or alcohol that's left was left like open. You can tell most of it was like stolen after everything fell apart. So there's still some like scraps and alcohol left, but it has been unattended for three, going on four weeks now oh, so like, ooh, so like a stiff beer over there somewhere.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Yeah, it moves like an old milkshake.
Speaker 1:Yeah, oh.
Speaker 2:Like a can of soup that hasn't been heated up. Yeah, it kind of makes a. I know that your drinking establishments used to have a bit more Liquid, liquid yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I've gotten that a lot lately. I know that your drinking establishments used to have a bit more liquid. Yeah, I've gotten that a lot lately. But no, this was not my bar, but yes, how much are you familiar with Union City and its layout, and how comfortable do you feel knowing the whereabouts of things?
Speaker 2:here Six out of ten.
Speaker 1:Six out of ten. That's not bad. I know it's here.
Speaker 2:That's not bad. I know it's here. We're in the bar. I got a vibe.
Speaker 1:I don't know about his six out of ten.
Speaker 3:Just let him keep trying to find a beer over there.
Speaker 1:He's going to eventually find it Just spooning jelly beer.
Speaker 3:Yes, he's figuring it out, though he's figuring it out, though he's figuring it out. Yeah, uh, I'm at all times casing a, a place for um I'm I'm in full-on rogue mode every time I walk in a building, so I'm looking to see if there's any weird fixtures, if there's anything strange to this place other than give me a perception check, then 13.
Speaker 1:Okay, and then you were about to say something, vance.
Speaker 2:What would Vance know about this? Because you said I'm from this area, but I personally, Tyson, doesn't know outside that it's a.
Speaker 1:DC library. Oh yes, that's a good point. So, basically, what Vance would know is that this is more of there's not very many people that live here. This is an incredibly tourist slash traveling business. So you would know that, essentially, the city is broken down into three districts. Down into three districts. The first district is the one that you walk into, which is like the touristy one, that has, like your very stereotypical, like tourist attractions for like, hey, this is about our country, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then the middle area is where all the business happens. That is where all the politicians meet, this is where everybody is making deals and saying this is why we're supporting soldeus, this is why we're supporting here, this is why we're supporting here, this is why we're staying out of it. And then the back district is essentially the abandoned stepchild of this city, where all of the workers that have to deal with all this bullshit live, because they can't afford the fancy suburbs.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean. So it is very split up into three separate classes within this capital, Because as much freedom as this continent that you're in gets, all of the bad of the establishment is kind of very conveniently fitting here because it has to. It's the only place that there is a true government entity in the country.
Speaker 2:Yeah, okay. So then, yes, I feel like a 6 out of 10.
Speaker 1:Cool right on. And then, with your 13, you notice that a lot of like there's a really grim scene that has played out in this bar, like outside. It was very just like trash piling up all the stuff that you see when, like, cities are in a collapse. Trash piling up all the stuff that you see when cities are in a collapse. But now that you're in here, you start to see claw marks on the windows where it looks like there was just some desperate attempt to get out. You're starting to see little bloodstains where these feuds and the lack of food has led people to fight. And you also give me an arcana check with your 13 perception. That's 14. Okay, so with a 14 on your arcana check, with your 13 perception.
Speaker 3:That's 14.
Speaker 1:Okay. So with a 14 on your arcana check, you also notice that when these dimensions collided, there was a lot of confusion and some of that spectral magic is still lingering that reminds you of the entities that you were fighting in Sol Deus. So they are also still brought into this world where a lot of people don't even know, like, who to trust. Like it was just pure panic for the first week that all this was happening. Uh, so you see, like the real struggle of what is going on in this city encapsulated perfectly in this bar say uh, would you say your name was?
Speaker 1:I am Balin. I am an informant for Silva.
Speaker 2:How wild. Like a Tim Robinson sketch. You're also like my name's, Greg.
Speaker 3:Oh shit.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Got him.
Speaker 1:Why you hang out here. Well, this was my city.
Speaker 3:No, no, no, I'm looking around. Why do you hang out in here?
Speaker 1:Well, in no, not like. I'm looking around. Why do you hang out in here? Well, in most chaos, the first places that are looted and gone through are the establishments that have food and water, and after a lot of that happened, this was a quiet place because nobody comes here anymore, because it's already been picked clean, because it's already been picked clean, so it was a very convenient safe house and it's a reminder of all the work that I need to do to put this place back to some semblance of normalcy, yeah you're going to need a carpenter or something.
Speaker 3:You're going to need somebody with woodworking skills.
Speaker 1:I'm more worried about the super beings destroying the dimension. But the carpenter, that's number two, I promise that's number two, I promise that's number two.
Speaker 3:Yeah, you're going to have to fix these windows. There's a lot going on in here, so where does everybody else hang out at?
Speaker 1:Well, most people have flooded out of this district because since a lot of the degeneracy for lack of a better term and stuff happened in this district, the next logical place to go was to loot the rest of the city, which is where you saw when you first came in. So most of it is contained to the first two districts. The only people that are still lingering around here are the ones that really have some grit to make it. One might say this is PvP-enacted servers over here. Oh no, that's a bit of a meta-reference for something that's not even invented in this world yet.
Speaker 1:But I felt like it made sense in the moment.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah, I'm picking up what you're putting down.
Speaker 2:I thought it was weird, everyone had red nameplates. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:You hear right outside the window oh god I just got stabbed. It's not good here. It is not.
Speaker 1:It's not good yeah, uh, all right, well, I guess we're, uh, we're following you, so for my information that I've been able to gather, there is a outpost here in district three that, uh, we believe has some information, and one of the reasons that we believe has some information and one of the reasons that we believe it has information is because, as you are well aware, alyssa Alyssum was very capable of speaking with politicians and putting some people under her thumb, as you experienced with Kerhill and some of your other ventures. We believe that the same thing is happening in all four countries, so we assume that the best place to do that would be the capital.
Speaker 3:Yeah, but she dead though.
Speaker 1:Alyssum is dead, but there are other leaders amongst this organization. Hmm, dc, not DC.
Speaker 3:OMC.
Speaker 1:Yeah, he threw me off with OMC. Union City would be the most logical place but also the most obvious place for them to kind of settle in, to have the most contact with the most people. So what we believe is, after the chaos broke out, they have established some form of base of operation here to keep tabs on what business and what governance is still happening. And with that, at about that time, the door gets kicked in as three bandits start to raid the building.
Speaker 2:Are they attacking us?
Speaker 3:Yeah, I mean because it ain't really shit in here. I'm going to stand back and watch them find soup beer.
Speaker 1:Yeah, roll me. Perception checks Nine. Okay, oh, you have, give me an advantage for you.
Speaker 3:I got a 12.
Speaker 1:Wow, really With an advantage, you got two, got a 12. Wow, really, with an advantage, you got two nines. That's a bummer.
Speaker 2:No, no, no, Nine was the better one. Oh, I rolled worse the second time.
Speaker 1:I had a 12. You had a 12. Okay, so as far as you can tell right now, they are just normal bandits and they are coming for you guys.
Speaker 3:Oh, they're coming at me coming for you guys.
Speaker 2:Oh, they're coming at me, they are coming right for you guys. Oh Well, that's different. You said they were raiding the place. You didn't say they were attacking us.
Speaker 3:Oh well I, they got weapons.
Speaker 1:Yes, yeah, they have short swords. I guess I minced my words a little bit there. They basically kicked in the door and started to come after you guys.
Speaker 2:Alright, that's different.
Speaker 1:They're raiding you guys.
Speaker 2:Oh Not the building. Oh, they know we're here, they coming at us, yes, so this is a robbery. It's a robbery, howdy fellas Get you some sludge?
Speaker 1:Oh, you're going to try and talk to them, yeah, okay. The first one goes ah, we're not interested in sludge, we're interested in the payout for your heads.
Speaker 2:Okay, yeah, that's pretty clear.
Speaker 3:Wait, you trying to get paid for my head? Is that what you said to me? That's, that's the kind of weird shit y'all into, yeah you couldn't afford it, big boy you guys aren't even like vicious mockery, you guys are just like yeah I mean, until he starts swinging, I'm to stand here and just be ready. I'm going to stand right next to the other elf and be like, hey, man, you called him.
Speaker 1:His cheeks get a little bit flush, he goes, you know what, don't be gross. And then he comes at you with a short sword Give me your guys' initiative.
Speaker 3:All right.
Speaker 2:My initiative is no longer negative. That's going to be a 19.
Speaker 3:Hell yeah, okay, that's a 21.
Speaker 1:Okay, so off the rip. We are starting with Dolo.
Speaker 3:So he's coming at me with a short sword?
Speaker 1:Yes, two of them are. Oh, two of them are coming at me with a short sword. Yes, two of them are on you, one is on Vance.
Speaker 3:All right, how far away are they?
Speaker 1:They ran up to you at the beginning, so I would say they're probably about five, ten feet away.
Speaker 3:Oh nice, that's even better. I'm going to go straight from the hip with a dagger, okay, and before he can even lift his sword to swing at me, I'm tossing one at his chest, whoever's closest to me.
Speaker 1:Okay, mm-hmm, so you throw that dagger, give me your two hit.
Speaker 3:That's an 11.
Speaker 1:An 11. Okay, and you said you threw two right.
Speaker 3:No, I threw one dagger, the one whoever is closest to me.
Speaker 1:Okay, so just the one. Right now you throw the dagger and it looks like it should have hit, but right as it gets to them, it almost seems like or give me a perception, check 20? 20. So it almost looks like it should have hit. It was a close hit, like it was going to hit them right in the side or like the shoulder-ish, but right when it gets to them it almost feels like the light kind of bent and it just went right by them.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah, that ain't normal.
Speaker 1:Yes, that is what you found out with your perception check.
Speaker 3:He ain't normal.
Speaker 1:Anything else for your turn.
Speaker 3:I get a bonus action. I'm going to use that to yeah, fuck it. I'm throwing another dagger, only this time the one that I threw at the first time. It missed him. I'm going to take the second dagger and I'm going to fling it directly at his face. Okay, god, how did I roll 11 again? Well, we know how that went.
Speaker 1:Okay, and that is piercing damage, correct?
Speaker 3:Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:Same thing. It looks like it's going right straight for the middle of their nose and then you see a light little flicker and then it goes right through.
Speaker 3:All right. Well, yeah, I don't know, that's my turn. Okay, thanks, we'll see what happens.
Speaker 2:I'm going to go ahead and charge up to the one that was talking about coming after our heads, okay, and I'm going to just hit them real.
Speaker 1:Good, I'm going to hit them real good With your mace, with my mace, which I believe is a magical mace. It is.
Speaker 2:I'm trying to find the. Oh yeah, there, it is Okay. Yeah, with my mace, with a 15.
Speaker 1:15 to hit. Yeah, all right, that does hit. Nice, you hit right square and just like the side of the neck, like it is a well-placed shot, and they don't react Like there is no pain or anything on their face, but it clean, knocks over this first bandit and when he hits the ground, actually give me your damage first.
Speaker 2:That would be five, five, three damage two radiant, two radiant.
Speaker 1:So that little bit of damage was able to knock it on the ground, no expression of pain or anything like that. But when it hits the ground it starts to sizzle like it's burning and then just fall into the floor.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you're right, these guys ain't normal.
Speaker 3:No they're not normal.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you guys are a couple of private eyes. It is now their turn. That's all I got. Yeah, the final two take their swings. One, or I guess they're both still on Dolan.
Speaker 3:Does an 11 turn? They're both charging me. No, it does not.
Speaker 1:Okay, the second one swings, that's not going to hit. And then they get a second attack. Does a 19 hit? Yeah, all right. And then the final second swing is a miss. So one hits you when the short sword makes contact with you. It doesn't cut, but it does. You feel an intense searing pain as you take nine psychic damage.
Speaker 2:What your brain? That's where you keep your thoughts.
Speaker 1:It is where he keeps his thoughts.
Speaker 3:Mm-hmm, is it back to the top with me?
Speaker 1:After is where he keeps his thoughts.
Speaker 3:Mm-hmm, is it back to the top with me?
Speaker 1:After that, it's Balin, Mm, and Balin pulls a vial out of his coat and he pops open the top of it and, just like he's misting a bed of flowers or something just flings out. This mist of water Hits him in the Emerald Lagasse Bam.
Speaker 3:Throws some holy water at him Both of them make dexterity saving throws.
Speaker 1:The first one passes and the second one fails. The one that failed as the water hits them, oh yeah, just completely melts it. Once again, no reaction on its face of pain, but the moment that the water sprinkles on it, it just completely bubbles up and sinks back into the floor. There's now one left and we are on Dolo.
Speaker 3:In that case, I'm going to grab him, because the one that's left is the one that cut me right.
Speaker 1:Yes, Is his sword still in me or is it a drug across me? Like a phantom? It just passed through you, but it felt like you were on fire the whole way through.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah, reactionary, I'm going to grab his throat.
Speaker 1:Okay, you're going to reach out and try and grab him. Mm-hmm, okay, give me a. How would this work? I don't think he would resist, so you just grab his throat, and when you do, I need you to make a wisdom saving throw.
Speaker 3:Kind of what I was going for there you switched in the big dice Chunky boy. I just wanted to see what would happen, yeah.
Speaker 2:It says numbers, but in capitals.
Speaker 3:Right, that is a 10. A 10.
Speaker 1:Okay 10, 10. Okay, so with a 10 you are able to grab them. But much like when you made contact with the sword, your hand you feel it start to burn as you take another 3 psychic damage. Hmm, what do you do now that you have him grappled?
Speaker 3:bonus action I push him into Balin cause he's got that stuff. What do you do now that you have him grappled? Bonus action I push him into Balin Because he's got that stuff.
Speaker 1:The bottle of stuff. Okay yeah, I'm just going to say he doesn't really resist these beings, aren't? They have one mission and they're just going for it. So you are able to successfully push, and when you push them into balen he looks a little bit disgruntled. Um, but we'll say that that ends your turn. It doesn't hit balen, vance. You have a reaction here. Do you do anything to stop it from hitting balen?
Speaker 2:it is now your turn I hit him with my mace. You're gonna try and hit yeah okay cool.
Speaker 1:I wasn't sure if you were gonna see what happened when it hit Balin.
Speaker 2:I'm assuming it would burn Balin, I'm assuming, judging from the reaction of the hand in there.
Speaker 3:It's up to you. I don't know, we don't know what kind of magic Balin working with.
Speaker 1:Dolo set the premise. He did the push. According to Action Economy, you could have reacted to it before Balin takes the hit.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'm going to hit him with the like he grabbed him and shoved him, so I'm going to hit him in the spine with my hammer. Give me that two hit, all right, 19.
Speaker 1:That does hit Four. Give me that damage. Five damage, five damage, but some of it's radiant.
Speaker 2:Two damage radiant.
Speaker 1:Yep, so they do the same Fall into the floor and sink in.
Speaker 2:You hurt my friend and I don't like that kind of thing.
Speaker 1:And after this happens, balin just kind of looks kind of just like, rubs his hands real quick, puts the vial back in his pocket and he goes. And that's actually part two of why we think they're headquartered here, because these raid teams are going everywhere and he's very calm about this like this is very very matter of fact, just like, and also these guys that look like real people but dissolvent.
Speaker 3:He's just very casual about it you got some more that juice uh, yeah, I've procured uh quite a bit for my own self-defense, but I don't know if you noticed, but we're going to need some of that.
Speaker 2:What's in that juice? Is it garlic?
Speaker 1:Do you think these are vampires?
Speaker 2:No, I just Garlic's nice.
Speaker 3:He was going to eat it. He's been eating soup beer for the last 10 minutes. My mouth is garbage right now, I love a lilac a garlic. No, for real, You're going to have to come clean, man, what is?
Speaker 1:that. Well, that's about what I was going to try and get at, but the situation here is very dire because, as you can tell I don't know if you guys could tell they looked like normal people to the naked eye. No, Yet when they hit you, it looked like you were in some intense pain. Yet you have no scars.
Speaker 3:Well, they're on the inside.
Speaker 1:Right, yeah, yeah. Yeah, the inside boo-boos which normally you can fix with alcohol, but it's all pudding right now yeah yeah, right, yeah right.
Speaker 1:So you can see why this city is completely went to shit and he goes. I do have some more of these vials and I can spare you one, but I will need to keep the rest on me for for self-defense, of course. But I noticed, vance you're, you were able to to dissipate them yeah, I, I'm pretty cool, Because he wouldn't know that you're a cleric and he goes. So that means you inherently can deal radiant damage. Then yeah.
Speaker 1:Okay, no, that was a good talk. That was a good talk. That's phenomenal news because, as you can can tell, any amount of damage that you did had defeated them I thought I was just really strong.
Speaker 2:So just any amount of radiant damage will go ahead and dissipate for the most part, yes, unless there are particularly strong ones.
Speaker 1:A lot of these grunt level ones do seem to dissipate with radiance.
Speaker 2:That's good to know.
Speaker 1:But throughout the entirety of these raids and stuff like that, these beings haven't been around for very long. We've only been seeing them for about a week and they are wreaking more havoc than the people are on themselves because people think they're getting mugged, they can't stop their weapon and then they're collapsing on the ground, going basically catatonic from whatever this psychological horror that they're going through from getting hit.
Speaker 3:So you're saying any amount of radiant damage will take them out?
Speaker 1:At least the lower level ones. I've come across some more sturdy fellows.
Speaker 3:And that vial is what Holy water.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 3:Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm. Looks like I'm going to have to keep this damn necklace after all, and he goes now.
Speaker 1:With that being said, we can procure more of this holy water because we did get some help, and at about that time he leads you down a flight of stairs in the back of the bar and in the bottom there are a few people sitting around a table, but there's one person that you guys recognize from quite some time ago. That is your old pal Essel the priest.
Speaker 3:Hey, what's up, lizard boy, how's?
Speaker 1:your co-acre. What? That's one hell of a greeting. It's been like three months. It's just like how's your asshole? I don't know what's up with that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we've been going back and forth. We got some money down, so you kind of left. I'm just kidding, it's good to see you bud.
Speaker 1:It's fantastic to see you gentlemen as well. I made my way after we parted ways. We got everybody to safety and I decided to lend my ability to the cause.
Speaker 2:Nice.
Speaker 1:And, as you can see, there's all kinds of stuff set up in this basement. They've got a little holy pool of water that they're coating their weapons in. They have a whole operation here. It is like a small resistance to push back against these beings and he goes. Well, I would love to join you, but I do feel like helping here maintain this district as best we can would be best. However, I do want to help you when it comes to finding out more information, and he asks for your weapons.
Speaker 3:Like all of them.
Speaker 1:Just the ones that you use in combat. We don't have time to code anything. I don't do this.
Speaker 3:I just open my jacket and start pulling out random knives that I've collected Just a bunch of knives. I got two more upstairs. I missed a couple guys.
Speaker 1:At about that time Essel starts taking your weapons, coding them and blessing them and stuff like that. While Balin leads you over to essentially a big map of the city and you see a bunch of circles and pinpoints, you can really tell that they've really nailed down where we can get some more information and it all seems to be centered on a destroyed building on the northeast side of town a destroyed building on the northeast side of town and he goes. A lot of the activity that we've detected from your friend Essel and some other mages that we've had passing through the city shows an incredibly high concentration of magic in this area. The odd thing is that when everything broke out, this was one of the main food hubs where a lot of grain and a distribution center of sorts, so it got completely decimated within the first week during all the looting and everything like that.
Speaker 1:So this entire city block over this way is just decimated. However, the concentration of mana is off the charts.
Speaker 3:Question how much of this holy water you got? Is this it?
Speaker 1:Oh, it's, I mean, like a witch's cauldron, like it's just a big cooking pot that he's just blessing water as much as he can, as it's needed.
Speaker 3:And he's blessing the water. Essel is yes, and that's all it takes to make this radiant water.
Speaker 1:No, he's using components as well.
Speaker 2:25 gold pieces worth of powdered silver. Yes, ritual takes an hour to complete. That's what I'm trying to the reason.
Speaker 3:I'm asking is how do the people in the city get water?
Speaker 1:The holy water. No, just water, just water in general.
Speaker 3:Where's the well? Or is there a tower, or is?
Speaker 1:there. The three wells that are located within the city are incredibly heavily guarded and it is monitored by, essentially, the guard force here. So there's daily allotments, there's rationing, so there's only three places to get water.
Speaker 3:You think we could fill up a cart here with some water and say that we're there to refill. I would love to see pouring this into the main water main and seeing what kind of random shit will occur throughout the city, kind of like they dosed everyone at Vietnam.
Speaker 1:What is Vietnam?
Speaker 3:Exactly Well, it wasn't a war.
Speaker 1:It's a place. So essentially you're saying that we bless as much of this water as we can and then pour it back into the well. None of us have thought of that idea before. We're more than happy to try it out. Is this something that you're wanting to try before or after the investigation?
Speaker 3:Well, I mean, we obviously want to have enough to keep us safe from any kind of encounters we may have. But I'm in my mind, I'm thinking, if we, if we poison the well, essentially we'll, we'll stir up some, some things. You know, you spray out a, you spray out some, some plant killer, some insecticide bugs come running.
Speaker 1:I do understand the logic. I don't know if these beings would come into contact with the water, but we're more than happy to give it a shot.
Speaker 3:If nothing else, it gives the city some defenses against these people.
Speaker 1:Okay. And then he kind of looks around and he goes is holy water? Is that okay to drink? Would we not poison everybody? Is holy water okay?
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean unless you're a demon, or yeah. Okay, I got an idea.
Speaker 3:Let's all drink a vial.
Speaker 1:Well, I will definitely let you do that first.
Speaker 2:I take a drink of holy water, yeah.
Speaker 3:Okay, and then I take a drink of holy water and then we stare at everybody waiting on everyone to drink holy water.
Speaker 1:Everybody, mm-hmm, okay, soup's, holy water. And then we stare at everybody waiting on everyone to drink holy water. Everybody, okay, soup's on, soup is on. So essel's like jokingly, because he knows as well. He's like oh yeah, of course, and he, he drinks the vial of it. Um, a couple other people at the table drink a vial of it, but there's there's two people at the table that are incredibly hesitant and they were like you guys all proved it. Like it's safe to drink, splash them. It's just like what.
Speaker 3:He like trips and falls oh.
Speaker 1:So when you splash them, it immediately starts to burn them, are you guys?
Speaker 2:demons. Are you one of the?
Speaker 1:things. What's up? Well, they don't melt and a loud well. One of them melts, one of them completely just dissolves, goes into the ground.
Speaker 2:Yeah, all right.
Speaker 1:While the other one screeches and just jumps up to the ceiling like some horror movie and scurries back out up the stairs.
Speaker 3:All right.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's awfully casual.
Speaker 2:Was that one of the stronger? What did you expect? Come on.
Speaker 3:Y'all don't vet people anymore. We don't check people's backgrounds before we let them into the unholy, holy basement.
Speaker 1:Essel is shocked. Essel is not the information guy, he's just the guy that's here to help. But Balin looks just like beside himself, like he's having a really hard time comprehending what just happened, because the person that you splashed was an incredibly close friend of his.
Speaker 2:Well, I've watched both the Thing and Sinners recently Convenient Splashed, was an incredibly close friend of his Well, I've watched both the Thing and Sinners recently Convenient.
Speaker 1:We're getting all kinds of references from, not this Vietnam.
Speaker 2:I'm still trying to figure out. It's a place. It's a place I mean Vietnam's a pretty old reference.
Speaker 1:Not in this world.
Speaker 3:You're going to have to get on a boat if you want to go there.
Speaker 1:That's all I'm saying and he goes, but we just, and he's just having such a like he's speechless at this point and he goes. But that's not possible. I've known him for years, yeah you ever do that before. Well, I can't say we've ever drank holy water together.
Speaker 3:Well, you didn't, it didn't happen to you now did it?
Speaker 1:No, and he's still just trying to piece things together and he goes. I've known him since before any of this happened.
Speaker 2:Question Is that how, like the stronger ones, react when they get hit with the holy stuff? Or is your buddy just a?
Speaker 1:vampire. Actually, he's been a vampire for many years.
Speaker 2:No, that is, he might not have told you.
Speaker 1:That is exactly how they respond. They immediately try and either fight or flight. I'm guessing this one ran the numbers in its head and figured it would be better to run.
Speaker 2:Yeah, Well, I mean on the bright side, you know.
Speaker 3:So no one ever noticed. He was like never coding weapons. He didn't want to touch the holy water that melted dude over there. Uh, did we know him? How well did y'all know him?
Speaker 1:well, he was relatively new, but he was also vouched for by my friend.
Speaker 3:Yeah, that checks, out.
Speaker 1:But my friend, sure he never coded the holy weapons, but he's an information gatherer. He's not a fighter, he's never been a fighter, he's more the brains, more the brains of the operation.
Speaker 3:Next to me he's definitely Spies. Go both ways, yeah.
Speaker 1:Well, we've never noticed that these creatures could take on the face of others. They always have like an uncanny valley type feel to them where they look like people but they've never masked themselves as another individual.
Speaker 3:Well, I mean to be fair. You might not have known the people they were masked as, just like the guys upstairs could be three dead dudes on the side of the road somewhere, and they just took their faces. And because you never met those guys, you don't recognize them, but it happened too close to home for you.
Speaker 1:Well, this changes so much, and I think that's where we're going to end. Well, quick thinking by the way, with the holy water everybody drinking. I was all right. That changes some stuff. You guys weren't going to figure that out for a minute.
Speaker 3:I'm in rogue mode, yeah yeah, you got to know if you're cool man drink the shit. Take a hit baby.
Speaker 2:I've done some of my most fun stuff on peer pressure. I get it.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, thank you all so much for joining. If this is your first episode, this was a great place to jump on, considering we had a time skip. My name is Tyler Waltz. I've been your DM to my left.
Speaker 2:Hi, I'm Tyson Cox. I've been playing Vance. You can find me at Tyson Cox Comedy. I do stand-up. Tyson Cox comedy, I do stand-up. I do daily shorts, videos, content, stuff like that. So if you like me, come find me, say hi.
Speaker 3:What up y'all. I am Dolo, aka Dolan Mircedrin. My name is Brian Petrie. You can find me at all things Brian Petrie comedy. Hang out with these guys and remember, if you're going to be in a room full of people, make them do the.