Simp - 109 - Hang Out With Your Slang Out Podcast

This episode's word can be summed up with these 3 words...

"SIMPin' aint easy!"

Well, actually that's not completely true, Matt & Dan manage to find new ways to SIMP over 80's movies, soccer teams, and dad jokes, with the ease of overactive kids all hopped up on kool-aid. So, they've got that going for them, which is nice.

S3 - SIMP

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:01

Hey, welcome back to the show. Guess what?

SPEAKER_00 0:05

Chicken butt. That joke's never gonna get old. You do this all the time. I do the same response. It's a pretty good joke, though.

SPEAKER_01 0:11

Yeah. Uh we got an email.

SPEAKER_00 0:15

Did we now? And it wasn't either one of our mothers. No, it wasn't. And I didn't know about the email. You were going to apparently surprise me with the email, but instead of you surprising me with the email, the person who wrote it surprised me at work with the fact that they wrote an email. So I guess we're gonna handle that. First out of the gates. Thank you for the email, by the way. I think it was from a guy named Also Matt. Matt Bailey. What am I just surrounded by Matt's? I mean, the cool people that surround you are Matt's, yes. There's a song called Surrounded by Idiots, and it kind of fits. Uh, not for this guy. Okay. What about this guy? He's not an idiot. No, no, no. But but he was very angry with us. He was very angry with me. Yeah, that makes sense. Nobody gets mad at me. Everybody gets mad at you. Shit. So his email reads, and I quote. Gentlemen, and I use that term loosely. Matt, just for the record, in the future, uh, I've also said that same thing in the past. Um gentleman? Calls me gentlemen all the time. No, no. Why would I call one person gentleman? This guy. I say I use and I use that term much like I hold on loosely. Uh, anyways, catching up on the podcast, and I'm here to tell you that crib notes are a thing. And then he sent a link to the Cambridge Dictionary. Oh, he wasn't messing around, huh? No. He gave me like a real dictionary, not like one of them sad little American dictionaries. Fancy. And uh crib notes, noun, US, informal. Uh that's weird the pronunciations were different. Doesn't matter. A piece of paper that contains notes or information to help someone remember something, especially one used for cheating during an examination.

SPEAKER_01 2:06

See, and I remember in the episode, I told you there was they were called crib notes, and you were like, no.

SPEAKER_00 2:13

First of all, I'm not as old as either of you.

SPEAKER_01 2:15

So Is he as old as I am?

SPEAKER_00 2:18

Uh yeah, I think so. Okay. So that may have something to do with it. Uh-huh. Also, the people I went to school with with weren't by nature criminals, so we didn't have terms for them. I will say that for sure I used them at some point, but I I'm also almost positive that I only used them when the teacher was like, okay, you can have a sheet of notes. Yeah, but that was like a thing, especially for college.

SPEAKER_01 2:39

Crib notes were a thing. And what what episode was that that we were talking about? It wasn't crib. It might have been crib.

SPEAKER_00 2:48

I feel like that was a newer episode.

SPEAKER_01 2:50

He's this uh we're just calling him Matt.

SPEAKER_00 2:52

We're not giving him full name right now. I mean, I said his full name earlier, but we'll just call him Matt for um he's catching up on the episodes, right? You see the guy that's been Yeah, so he's a regular at my new place of well, semi-new place of business. I've been with the company for over a year now, but in this location for seven, eight months. Yeah. Um, and I had told him that I had a podcast. And surprising to myself and probably you because of our normal listener count, he actually has started listening, but he wanted to start from the top. So he started at episode one and sort of worked his way up. Which I kind of like because we honestly we get it's a little rough at first, but I feel like we get better. It's a little rough now. It was a lot of rough at first. Yeah. And anyways, so whatever episode it happened to be, which we'll probably send another email yelling at me because I don't remember what episode it is. Although, to be fair, every episode we have ever recorded, I've forgotten everything we recorded until I listened to the episode. Gotcha. Um, whatever episode it was, I repeatedly said that crib notes weren't a thing, apparently. And they apparently are a thing. Um, and it reminds me of a Simpsons episode. All right, let's do it. You better get it out before I get that music going. So there's an Simpsons. Wait, did the music cut in already? No, no. This is like the Oscars. So the there's a Simpsons episode where there's a guy who um, well, Homer has to remember something, so he writes something on his hand, but it isn't enough space, and then they end up making fun of another guy at work who writes something on his hand, but he's has a comically large hand, and so he walks by go saying, I think they're making fun of me. It's like that one time, and he's reading the entire thing from his giant hand. I think you bring that up in the episode, too. Probably. That's pretty good.

SPEAKER_01 4:44

Um, all right, Matt, thank you for writing in. Uh, do it again, tell all your friends. Um, especially if you're gonna tell this guy that he's wrong.

SPEAKER_00 4:54

Because that's usually what our emails are. I would like to point out that it is nicer when the people that I know agree with me. Uh-huh. Like, it was nice when the person that knows Dan disagreed with him. That still sticks in my crawl. Right. So, like. We don't even need to talk about that. I guess it's the same situation. It just should be the other way around. Let's move on. All right. Thanks, Matt, for the email. Thanks. Uh, I'll see at work, I guess, where you can belittle me for this.

SPEAKER_01 5:24

And you see what happens when you guys write in? We talk about you. Usually, usually good.

SPEAKER_00 5:29

Or we talk well about you. That's pretty good. Pretty good grammar I got going there. Yeah, that's nice. You're a writer. And not even side saddle. Wait, that's writer. All right. Uh well, welcome to the show. I'm Matt. I'm Dan. This is Hangout. With your slang out, apparently I was wrong. Happens more than you think. I should take some crib notes to make sure I know everything I have to say for this episode.

SPEAKER_01 6:00

If you believed in them in the first place, we wouldn't be in this mess.

SPEAKER_00 6:02

It's not Jesus. Like now I understand that they exist. Thank you, Matt. Not this one. A good one. We'll be back. Story of my life. No, Riverside's gonna fix this shit. I hope so. I hope so. We'll get there. So Lil Birdie told me, and you know, I listen to Lily Bird Little Birds all the time. Yeah, that's a little concerning. Yeah. You're not like uh St. Francis of a Cece. Cece Deville, the guitarist for poison? Uh no. Uh uh Cecil B. DeMille, the famed director.

SPEAKER_01 6:48

It's the guy who made a ketchup, right?

SPEAKER_00 6:50

No, that is. We could do this forever. Let's uh Little Birdie told me that you might have a word for us this week. Oh, I do. That little birdie was me. I told you earlier that I had a word for us this week. It's a big bird. Well, not to be confused with Big Bird. What was Big Bird's best friend's name? Um, Raven. Quote the Raven. Nevermore. What was this? What was Big Bird's best friend's name? I just want to recap just to see if you remember. Oh, Snuffilophagus. Very nice. Yeah, well done. They had to go way back in time to find that one. That's okay. Yeah. That's an early one. With any luck, we'll figure out how to link that episode in the sidebar.

SPEAKER_01 7:32

So apparently it's not Snuffilophagus, like everybody else in the world has ever said.

SPEAKER_00 7:37

Not anybody else. Yeah. Not the creators of Sesame Street, I'll tell you that much. Those guys were so high when they made up Snuffilephagus. Well, obviously. Doesn't roll off a tongue. Because Snufflephagus does.

SPEAKER_01 7:51

Okay. You're we're getting lost now.

SPEAKER_00 7:53

Just because he wants to be right. He started up this podcast. I want to be right. Started this episode being wrong. Thank you, Matt. Yes, I do. Need a little rebound here. Okay. Okay, what's your word? Uh, so this is sort of uh uh based on what has been happening around me currently, but I promise I wouldn't talk about it too much. So oh my god, it's puberty. It is puberty. I finally hit it. Nice. Beard's coming in pretty good now. Thanks, man. Um no, it's a word that's been on our list for a long, long, long time. Is it current? Um, it's current in that it has never stopped being used. Awesome. Was that the word? No. Oh shit. Rad. Also not the word.

SPEAKER_01 8:37

Yeah, we're gonna do rad again.

SPEAKER_00 8:39

No, so it's uh it is it's simp. Oh, that has been on our list for a long time. Which is both the noun and a verb.

SPEAKER_01 8:50

Mm-hmm. So I'm a little bit familiar with this.

SPEAKER_00 8:53

Don't ever use this word. I don't I don't really either until the personification of it was directly in front of me. Did you get accused of simping? I did not get accused of simping. Although I'm sure at some point in our relationship I was simping. We've all done it. Yes. But we didn't call it simp back in the day. We called it um I don't know what'd be the right word. I mean, it's kind of whipped, but it's not really whipped. Yeah, it's not really whipped, but there is a there is a little bit of uh of that to it. It can be part of that. But um simping is just like when you're just crushing up. Simp's ain't easy for your shirt. That could be good. Oh shit, we shouldn't talk about that on there. No, we shouldn't talk about that on there. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 9:38

Um okay, I brought up Urban Dictionary first thing.

SPEAKER_00 9:41

Simp. What does UD have to say?

SPEAKER_01 9:43

Um, someone who puts the hoes before the bros, simps will do or say anything to please someone, particular, particularly a girl, in the hopes that they will be in gain favor.

SPEAKER_00 9:56

This is primarily a term used on males as a derogatory term. Doesn't have to be, but it is primarily used that way. Yeah, I think you're right. I think it I think that's and from the little bit of research I did the other day. Stop. I know I have never done research before coming into an episode. Holy shit. But from the little bit of uh research I did the other day, it actually is the sh shortening of simpleton, which is weird because I don't feel like simpleton really states what this is. Yeah. So it's interesting to me. But yeah, yeah, it's uh it's a thing where well, what is it? I mean, I guess you kind of said it. It's putting when they say it's putting hoes before bros, it's it's the guy's way of saying that they're putting that their friend is putting a girl before their group of friends.

SPEAKER_01 10:44

So simp as a verb, uh to express great appreciation for someone to the point of putting them on a pedestal can be used in both the platonic and or romantic sense.

SPEAKER_00 10:56

Yes. And it is from what I can tell, also, it's it's basically like um not being yourself anymore to be what that other person needs you to be. I feel like it's it's kind of like robbing yourself of. I feel like it's a really broad, it can be used.

SPEAKER_01 11:19

I'm trying to remember what word we would have used back in the day that would have meant the same thing. Like we would have just said, like, I'm we're crushing on that person or something like that.

SPEAKER_00 11:26

Where like no matter what that person, if you like had the big the doe eyes, like you know, the Disney. Literally, they could have murdered a person in front of you. Yeah, and you're just like, oh that was so sweet how they murdered them. I know how I am with my my French bulldogs. Yes. Anything they do, I'm like, oh damn, I miss my dog now. He's in the room, not the second one. The second one could be he could be like gone now, probably snorting coke.

SPEAKER_01 11:52

Snorting is what he does best.

SPEAKER_00 11:54

He does do a lot of snorting and farting. Thank God there's never been coke in front of him. Definitely would have snorted it. Yeah, he yeah, Bremington would do that. Um, yeah, so I totally simp for my wife. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 12:08

I totally had a crush on her for the longest time. And probably acted a fool. Still do a little bit.

SPEAKER_00 12:17

You still do act a fool, yeah. So for a while it was very much I felt like it was very athletically based. Really? Yeah. Like like it would be used on somebody that was at a status level where theoretically they wouldn't need to send for somebody else, like they would be the object of affection. Okay. And and routinely it was about like some athlete or something that was you know hitting below their pay grade or whatever.

SPEAKER_01 12:53

But no, I always thought it was just for people you have crushes on, or like the guy who would like, or it could it could be a girl that you know you you like somebody but they don't know you exist, and your your buddies would bust your balls because all you're simping for that girl, or or you go you go above and beyond for somebody.

SPEAKER_00 13:12

That was my entire life until I was 37 years old. 37? 37.

SPEAKER_02 13:17

Hmm. You still simp for me a little bit?

SPEAKER_00 13:20

No. What are you talking about? I bought you a hat. That doesn't mean that means you simp for me. What are you talking about? I didn't buy the hat. Hmm. You bought me something that you thought I would like. You're trying to get my attention. That's you simping for me.

SPEAKER_01 13:34

Should we put those hats on?

SPEAKER_00 13:35

No, because I have to do my other podcast later. I can't mess up my hair.

SPEAKER_01 13:38

Oh my god. Is this thing called a comb?

SPEAKER_00 13:41

Yeah, combs don't work on this. Jufro?

SPEAKER_01 13:46

Come on, man. Come on, dude. This look I never wear hats. So this is gonna be this is gonna be good. This is gonna be good times. Huh? You gonna get in here?

SPEAKER_00 13:54

I'll watch you wear your get in on this?

SPEAKER_01 13:56

I'll watch you wear it.

SPEAKER_00 13:57

Well, we'll be champions by the time this is how this goes on. Do I tuck my ears in? Not supposed to. So I'm supposed to look like Roki's Sasaki. If you can, it means your hat's probably too big. Well, hang on.

unknown 14:10

You're tiny little.

SPEAKER_01 14:11

You mean that's not that's not the look?

unknown 14:13

Nope.

SPEAKER_00 14:13

Sure isn't.

SPEAKER_01 14:14

But look, check it out. I got a baseball too.

SPEAKER_00 14:18

I just want everybody to recognize that this would be the first 50 plus year old person that I've ever met that was excited about getting a baseball. We got some big lead chew over there too. It's like the guy that got excited about a Fruitopia cat. Fruitopia cats are awesome. Did you say Fruitopia cats? Cats are good too.

SPEAKER_01 14:36

I can't hear anything without my headphones on. That's great. Yeah, you sound much not good.

SPEAKER_00 14:44

So will this work? That's that's my that's my co-host, the uh the Soros. You sound much not good. Come on, dude, look at how cool I look. You look great.

SPEAKER_02 15:03

Do I look like Vin Skullly?

SPEAKER_01 15:05

Or Vic Skelly or Vint? What's his name?

SPEAKER_00 15:08

Vin. Yeah. No, because he didn't wear a hat during telecast. Dude, can I just say you sent me a whole bunch of like baseball stuff with him? You can say it, yes. Go ahead. Yeah, dude, you're I got me all emotional and shit the other day. Baseball at its heart is emotional. Dude, his his sign-off? Uh-huh. If I had been watching baseball all those years. Dude, I'd have been a blubbering idiot, dude.

SPEAKER_02 15:32

I mean you are a blubbering idiot. With a blubber fits. You must have quit? Yeah. Alright.

SPEAKER_01 15:41

Oh man, there goes my hair.

SPEAKER_00 15:42

See? You see why I didn't want to do it?

SPEAKER_01 15:46

Don't look at me. Look over there.

SPEAKER_00 15:47

Here I am.

SPEAKER_01 15:50

Oh, now I'm all my thing's all stretched out. A hat. My head.

SPEAKER_00 15:56

There it is. Not my butthole. What's simping for my butthole? Nobody was going to. Great song. One of the best fans out there. Teaser? No.

SPEAKER_02 16:07

Simp.

SPEAKER_00 16:08

They toured with Lit. Simp Asylum. Can you think of some some famous uh Simp situations? Um I can not not not necessarily in real life, but Ross and Rachel. Oh, that was for sure simping. Ultimate simping. We're about to go see the 40th anniversary of Back to the Future. Sure. And I would say George for Lorraine. Yeah. Also uh Marty for his actual girlfriend. He simps on her for a little bit. He's all about just getting back to her. On for Leia.

unknown 16:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 16:50

But he was like aggressively trying to not act like he was simping, but for sure it was simping. Return of the Jedi, um Jabba for Leia. Kind of gross. Interspecies simping.

SPEAKER_02 17:02

Sure.

SPEAKER_00 17:03

I feel like it's you for Dune? For who? For the movie Dune. You're all about the space penises. We've discussed this. Never even seen Dune. Seen a space penis though before. Who hasn't? But I've never seen Dune. Um you haven't? No. Not even the original? Like stings like naked in that. Trinity for Neo? Yeah. Morpheus for Neo. Morpheus for sure for Neo. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 17:30

Because he didn't even believe in himself. He was like, no, you're the one. Take your pants off, you're the one. That's that's what they do in the movie Red?

SPEAKER_00 17:37

I think so. Yeah. That's what I thought. You can't do kung fu with your pants on. I think that was the mate. The meat sack? Um the spaceworm. Back to the spaceworm.

SPEAKER_02 17:49

Uh I've been wanting to do simp for a while. Trav for Taylor? Who? Oh, Kelsey? I mean, he's out kicking his coverage. Notice how bad he's got a feeling?

SPEAKER_00 18:08

I mean, I feel like that's because of the simping. You think so? I think so. Like, he has less to concentrate on when it comes to football now. Like, it's less important. He's about to be a billionaire by marriage. True. He also, like, have you ever seen any of his old like uh interviews and stuff? Can I be completely honest?

SPEAKER_01 18:33

You didn't know that he existed in until he started dating her because I refused to watch football and I absolutely refuse to watch anything in Kansas City.

SPEAKER_00 18:41

So you remember like fuzzy Kangle hats? Yeah, vaguely. Okay, so he would wear things like that. Like he would he would really yeah. Whatever the most ridiculous thing you've seen an NBA player wear, which is a lot of ridiculous things if you've ever seen the clothes they wear coming to the games. Yeah. Um, he would wear things like that and be like the loudest, visually the loudest person in the room. And since Taylor came into his life, he's uh I don't want to say he's a stick figure, because that's not fair to him either. Like he definitely has his own personality, but it it's however big his personality was before, it's not as big. And I think in a very beneficial way to him, because I did not like him in any way whatsoever prior. I still don't I feel like I don't dislike him now because he's not getting back to the fact that I think his brother's awesome. Sure, yeah. But I don't like everybody loves Jason better than Travis, but because I I I think we see moments with Travis, like when he gets mad on the sidelines, when he acts like a little baby.

SPEAKER_01 19:47

That's the real Travis. That's not that's not in the heat of the moment. That's the person he is.

SPEAKER_00 19:52

Yeah, I guess, but that's also like when he does things like that, it's the superstar mentality, which is which I don't sort of just give me the damn ball. You don't see Muki Batsu and shit like that at Freddie Friedman. That's all they do. They don't do that, but it baseball's a very different sport. Okay, and football. Joe Montana or Jerry Rice, they never do anything like that. Jerry Rice would definitely be like a just give me the damn ball guy. No, but he wouldn't be screaming at the coach and throwing fits when he's how do you how do you scream at Bill Walsh? He can't scream at Bill Walsh. It's America's grandpa.

SPEAKER_01 20:25

You seen that footage of Joe Montana talking about he he figured out how he could call his wife during the games?

SPEAKER_00 20:29

Yeah. Hilarious. Just the greatest quarterback ever, just like how you call my wife. Also, I like how he figured out how he could do it. Like, literally, just like I won't pick up the phone and I wonder if this dials out. Well, he's like, you had to dial nine or something, but I was just like, Yeah, it was a hotel phone. That's literally all it was.

SPEAKER_01 20:48

I'm watching those games, and like you watch the highlights now, and it's just like, Are you kidding me? Like, it's some of the greatest moments and the focus they had to be in. You thought, and he's on the sidelines being like, Oh, my wife's making for dinner and stuff like that. And she's like, get off the phone, you're playing in a game.

SPEAKER_00 21:02

He's like, I just want to say hi.

SPEAKER_02 21:04

He's Jesus. He was simping. Simping for yeah, he was. Very proud of him. But, anyways, I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 21:12

I feel like Travis you've seen Napoleon Dynamite, right? No, yes, I've seen Napoleon Dynamite. The movie, not just seeing him around hanging out and stuff.

SPEAKER_01 21:22

His brother Chip when he gets with LaQanda or whatever, okay, and he starts to change.

SPEAKER_00 21:29

I feel like that was Travis before Taylor because he was almost married to an African-American woman.

SPEAKER_02 21:37

Right.

SPEAKER_00 21:37

And now he's going full opposite of that. So I just I feel like he's a douche canoe that is like paper doll. It is how I just want you to keep in mind, they do have their own podcast. And if we ever have any hope of we could start a fight with them. I don't want to start a fight with the Kelseys, they're bigger than us. I do like his brother a lot. Yeah, I think he's got a good head on the shoulder. They to be fair, they together they're fun though. I have to get on their podcast when I watch them. Yeah, they're hilarious. They're fun together. But I I really don't like Travis.

unknown 22:08

Yeah, yeah, you do.

SPEAKER_00 22:08

You just don't want to. I don't. I don't like them. You don't want to for the same reason. Like, you know, my dad basically took me out of the will for saying that I kind of like the Giants player. Like you just You had every right. That sounded that sounded legit. Was it McMahon?

SPEAKER_01 22:26

Huh? Wasn't he a Giant?

SPEAKER_00 22:28

No. First of all, I'm talking about the San Francisco Giants, not the not the New York Giants. Well, we were but we were talking football. Bill Sims was the quarterback of the So we were talking football, but you jumped right to the San Francisco Giants.

SPEAKER_01 22:38

McMahon was the yes, but I was talking about Yeah, and McMahon, he the one there with the glasses and stuff, the spiked hair.

SPEAKER_00 22:43

He was for the Bears. And and I don't mean like for the Bears in that he really liked big internet challenge.

SPEAKER_01 22:49

I know he was on the Bears, but wasn't he a Giant too?

SPEAKER_00 22:54

He did play for another team, but it wasn't the Giants.

SPEAKER_01 22:56

Yeah, I think I got myself shall screwed up, huh? What was his name?

SPEAKER_00 23:00

What yes, I did make the transition, and part of the problem that you had a problem with it is because you're not good at sports.

SPEAKER_02 23:05

But oh yeah, it looks like he was just the Bears. Whatever. He went to BYU, I know that. Jim McMahon.

SPEAKER_00 23:16

Bring your own bear beer. So he took you out of the will. There was a stretch. No, what I'm saying is there was a stretch where I would feel like the Niners and Chiefs were almost like the ultimate rivals because they kept getting to the Super Bowl against each other. Well, the Giants and the Dodgers are ultimate rivals, and my dad as a Dodger fan. By me saying that I potentially was okay with a Giants player, he was willing to take me out of the will. No, your dad was right.

SPEAKER_02 23:40

Sounds like a good man. I don't know. Will Clark was a good dude. Your dad's rolling over in the screen right now.

SPEAKER_00 23:47

Probably. Can't really, like, he's powder, but not like the movie, the white guy with the electricity. Completely different. That'd be awesome if that was your dad. That would be amazing. I love that movie. I love that movie too. Yeah, it's one of those few movies that me and my wife we loved that movie when it came out. And I think that's your dad. Can you believe it? Is that redhead in the movie? Is that your mom? No. Oh, Powder got around, huh? Sure did. It's like Talcum. Talcum.

SPEAKER_02 24:18

I hardly even know him. Oh. Another one for the shirt?

SPEAKER_01 24:24

Okay. I give you Ross and Rachel.

SPEAKER_00 24:27

Do you have uh another? Are you serious? We just went through a whole list of different ones that I gave you. Okay, we'll back that up. You gave you gave one? I gave you the best one. Is it the best one? It's a really good one. But is it the best one?

SPEAKER_01 24:40

It's just about the best one.

SPEAKER_00 24:41

What would be one that would rival Ross and Rachel? Um Zach and Kelly Kapowski.

unknown 24:49

Not even.

SPEAKER_00 24:50

Come on. No. There was no simpin' going on there. Okay. AC Slater and Jesse Spano. The man learned to dance and donned a leotard during an episode.

SPEAKER_01 25:02

Yeah, but I think he'd have done that anyways.

SPEAKER_00 25:05

Well, now knowing more about him, yes.

SPEAKER_01 25:07

But did you ever do something stupid for a girl like that?

SPEAKER_00 25:12

I know we all have. I'm just trying to think. I was trying to think of something I would have like a specific moment. Like put on leotards for somebody. Oh, I mean, I dressed as the bearded lady for Halloween, so for Candace because she likes Halloween and I don't.

SPEAKER_01 25:26

But I feel like I could have got you to dress like that.

SPEAKER_00 25:29

No. I feel like the bearded lady's just part of you. I mean, the bearded lady is part of all of us. Yeah. It's just it's deep. Because some of us have beards and some of us don't.

SPEAKER_02 25:38

Oh shoot, hang on. Sorry.

unknown 25:42

Fuck.

SPEAKER_00 25:43

Alright. Let's go. I see where I stand. What? Apparently you listen to your son. What are you talking about? Simping for your son. I do simp for my son. I if I simp for anybody now anymore, it's my son. I love him. He's the man. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01 26:02

So, okay, so you uh wore Leotard's. No, you were a dress. Yes. I mean it worked.

SPEAKER_02 26:10

You locked her down.

SPEAKER_00 26:12

Um now that I think about it, I don't know if that was before or after we were married. I think it was after we were married. It sounds like something you'd do.

SPEAKER_02 26:21

What?

SPEAKER_00 26:22

Sorry, didn't mean to yawn. You'll have to cut that. I thought this was more exciting. Clearly it's not. Jesus Christ.

SPEAKER_01 26:30

But we could talk about hockey or something.

SPEAKER_00 26:32

Jesus Christ, Mary Magdalene simped for Jesus Christ.

SPEAKER_01 26:36

You did. Or she did.

SPEAKER_02 26:38

I don't know why I said you did.

SPEAKER_00 26:40

I don't know why. Do you think that I'm Mary Magdalene?

SPEAKER_01 26:43

Uh huh.

SPEAKER_00 26:44

It's the beard. I don't even know that that's actually true. Because I know how wrong it is. So I feel like I've been simping over this podcast. I think Snufflepigus simp for Big Bird. For Big Bird? That's weird though. Do you think Ernie sent for Bert or vice versa? I thought we discussed that and we decided they aren't that. Just friends. Yeah, that's fine. You can sim for a friend.

SPEAKER_02 27:10

What are you trying to say? You can't simp for a friend. Well, I can't sim for a friend. Well, it's in your favorite show. It's in the name of your favorite show. The Simpsons. The Simpsons. I should have known. Explains a lot. Does it?

SPEAKER_00 27:27

Yeah. Is that why you always watch me walk away? I don't always watch you walk away. Why do you always like make sure I walk first? But I love to watch you leave. Don't go away, mad.

SPEAKER_01 27:36

Just go away, right? Yes.

SPEAKER_02 27:38

That's your lyrics. You like singing it? Nope. Whatever.

SPEAKER_00 27:44

So, like, are you do you like these chairs? Yes, mostly. I realized that I don't know how to sit in them. Like this. Because back feels like it should be the most comfortable. And it's really not.

SPEAKER_01 27:56

Because you're sitting like that, dude. Come on, dude. Loosen up. Let it flow.

SPEAKER_02 28:01

I refuse to let it flow. Are you autistic? Does it look like it? Kinda. Shit. You're the one sitting like this.

SPEAKER_00 28:13

Listen, I'm just loosen up, dude. Come on. Let it in. Let it in. Throw a knee up here. Let's do it. I'm just sitting the way that RFK Jr. would be. Let it in. Let the let love shine, dude.

SPEAKER_01 28:24

Oh, Jesus Christ. Did you just fart on camera?

SPEAKER_00 28:26

No, I didn't actually. You would know. See, look at how more relaxed you look now. I mean, the microphone ain't anywhere near you. It's it feels so bad. I did not realize how tight my knees were until we did this. I can't. Nope. So I love that. I love that you're out of shape. And that's what makes the chairs not comfortable. That's just everything would not be comfortable for a minute. Still more athletic than you. That's weird, right? How? Mentally athletic. Should we should we revisit? You want to run? Should we revisit Orlando? Should we go run? We can if you want. Or revisit Orlando or go run. Orlando's dead to me. Bloom and the city. Fuck pirates, man. No, you can't fuck pirates. If if Katy Perry can, we can't. I say she was dating Orlando Bloom. They were married. I think they broke up, right? Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 29:19

She's psycho. She kissed a girl once. I heard she liked it. Mm-hmm. I heard there's a video about it. I miss my dog.

SPEAKER_00 29:31

Not much, because he's outside the door. And you could let him in. We should probably put an end to this so we can just stop. Is it my dog? Just because he's simping for me, you want to kill him? I'm not not saying that. Shit. We're in trouble now.

unknown 29:46

Alright.

SPEAKER_00 29:50

Probably true. I feel like we should have done that. But it wasn't readily available in front of me for a while. It was in our list for the last three years. Not the word, like the activity of simping? Yes.

SPEAKER_01 30:02

You've been simping for me this whole time. I mean, I know you want to be a Dodger fan. Just come on.

SPEAKER_00 30:09

I was a Dodger fan before you were a Dodger fan.

SPEAKER_01 30:11

I was born before you, so how is that possible?

SPEAKER_00 30:13

Because you've been a Dodger fan for a year and three months. No, it's been a good year and a half. It has not been a year and a half.

SPEAKER_01 30:20

Dude, you want to see my Tommy LaSorda tattoo?

SPEAKER_02 30:23

Kinda, yeah. Well, I can't show it to you. I have to take my pants off.

SPEAKER_00 30:28

Because there is one, you know, I'll look away.

SPEAKER_02 30:30

What?

SPEAKER_00 30:31

No, you always look over the stall. We've discussed this. We discussed this. And I don't. Was that a dream? Yes. Now who's simping? You. Yeah. Sounds right. That fits.

SPEAKER_01 30:44

All right. So the dream fits.

SPEAKER_00 30:46

All right. Do you have any simps that you know about? Listening audience? You can you can email those simps to hang out. Hangout slangout. Hangoutslangout at gmail.com. Eventually, at least by the time we hit episode 200, I'm gonna get that right every time. Hangoutslangout at gmail.com. Your list of simps. Yeah. Or check us out on hangout slangout.com. Or just your favorite simpsons characters. That's also Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 31:12

There should be there should probably some really good simp stories out there.

SPEAKER_02 31:16

Has to be. Probably. We've all done it. I mean this guy will put a dress on for you. Just saying. I won't I mean I won't put one on for you. I put one on for my wife. I mean, I might take a dress off for you. He will not do that. I'm Dan. I'm Matt. And I've been simping for this word for years. No, not really, but whatever.

SPEAKER_00 31:46

You sound like you walk funny. Are you a simp? No, the if so, can I That's Gimp. Sorry.

SPEAKER_01 31:53

Yeah, don't they have an Olympics for that?

SPEAKER_00 31:55

What's your f my favorite is the good year. What's your favorite simp? Wait, that's a blimper. I love how you enunciate a blimp. Damn. Uh yeah, we'll we'll get there next time. What's your favorite scary movie? That's the wrong episode. So what's your favorite? Uh what's what's the scientific name for apes and monkeys and Rutabega. That's nope, I ain't it. Primate? Yeah, what's your favorite primate? Mine's a simp. Wait, nope, that's a chimp. Mine's Amazon Prime.

SPEAKER_02 32:36

Right? Sponsor? Yeah. Bring it on, Bezo. Bezos? Bez Bez Bezos. I'm simping for Bezos. That doesn't surprise me. Yeah. He's a handsome man.

SPEAKER_00 32:48

I mean handsome rich. Did you ever have any uh necklaces in the 90s made out of simp? No, that's hemp. No, just underwear. Keep going, I'll just fade. I'll just fade you out. What's the line before now I walk with a simp? Oh god. Anyways, let's get out of here before I come up with more poor examples. Up here, I'm already gone. I'm already gone.

SPEAKER_01 33:21

God damn, these chairs that don't slide. And he's back.

SPEAKER_00 33:27

Later slingers.

SPEAKER_01 33:28

Hey! Jinx, you owe me a simp coke. Yeah, it could have been.

SPEAKER_00 33:35

Should have been better. Jinx!

SPEAKER_01 33:38

We're doing the game, right? Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 33:41

That worked pretty good, right? The magic of television. We're on TV? We're on computers now? The internet's on computers now? To the futures now. Good stuff. Later slangers. I know that's the fourth time we've said it, but we made it this time. Bye.

SPEAKER_01 34:10

Um, I don't know. I still simp for like Keanu Reeves. I don't know if that's simping. No, I guess. Oh, if you knew.

SPEAKER_00 34:21

I will say there was a a a portion of time where I felt like it did weirdly have to do with famous people. Did you just throw a gourd off the table? It's still the holiday season. Nope. By the time this one comes out, it's gonna be like Christmas. Ah, it'll be it'll be like mid November when this one comes out. That's fine. Thanksgiving has pumpkins and shit with faces on them. Well, okay, not it's not exactly the same. Names, faces, faces and names. See, we're good at this.