Episode 22 - Radical Self-Trust: Your Inner Compass Never Lies

Ready to stop second-guessing yourself, buttercups? In this soul-stirring episode, Anthony and Arturo dive deep into the transformative power of radical self-trust. From seeking outfit approval to making life-changing moves across the country, we explore why trusting your gut might be the superpower you've been ignoring.

Through personal stories (including Arturo's intuitive leap to NYC and Anthony's meditation journey), we unpack:

• The crucial difference between ego chatter and inner wisdom
• How childhood trauma can disconnect us from our intuition
• Breaking free from the approval-seeking cycle
• Practical steps to strengthen your self-trust muscle
• Why your body knows before your mind does
• The connection between meditation and inner knowing

Whether you're drowning in others' opinions, healing from past wounds, or just starting to hear your inner voice, this episode offers both compassion and concrete tools for reconnecting with your internal compass. Plus, we share five actionable steps to start building radical self-trust today!

Remember: What if everything you've been searching for has been inside you all along? Time to wake up and trust yourself!

Tune in to "YASKing with Anthony and Arturo" on Spotify, with Apple Podcasts coming soon. Don't forget to subscribe and follow Anthony on IG and TikTok at @coachcatalino and Arturo on IG at @arturodiaz and TikTok @arturodiaznyc

Tune in to "YASKing with Anthony and Arturo" on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. Don't forget to subscribe and follow Anthony on TikTok at @coachcatalino and Arturo on IG at @arturodiaz and TikTok @arturodiaznyc

Transcript

Radical Self Trust Transcript of YASKING with Anthony and Arturo Podcast, Episode 22

SUMMARY KEYWORDS

self-trust, inner wisdom, ego vs intuition, letting go, personal approval, childhood trauma, meditation benefits, daily practice, positive affirmations, courage building, external expectations, feeling emotions, radical freedom, intuition exercises, inner voice

SPEAKERS

Anthony Catalino, Arturo Diaz

Arturo Diaz  00:00

Hey everyone, welcome to YASKING with Anthony and Arturo! I'm Arturo Diaz 

Anthony Catalino  00:13

and I'm Anthony Catalino, and it's good to be back, even though we weren't gone…

Arturo Diaz  00:20

Today we're tackling radical self trust. Ever notice how quick we are to trust others opinions, but second guess our own instincts? Well, it's time to flip that script or diving into the art of trusting your gut, separating true wisdom from ego and building Unshakable Confidence, even when past decisions haven't gone as planned, whether you're drowning in others expectations or just trying to trust your own inner voice. This episode is your wake up call. So buckle up buttercups. Are you ready to start asking the big questions? Ready to finally trust yourself? What if everything you've been searching for has been inside you all along? 

Anthony Catalino  00:56

H ear that buttercups, I think the most important thing that you just said is begin to trust yourself and not so much, give power away to other people's opinions, other people's thoughts. It's good old Lisa Nichols taught me well. She's this entrepreneur into the health, wealth mindset, all this greatness, and she says other people's opinions of you ain't none of your business, but your ego loves to eat away at other people's opinions and thoughts about you, get you to believe that, and then you feel lost. But we're talking about flipping that script today, right? 

Arturo Diaz  01:34

Yeah, flip that script, let go of other people's opinions and that mental need to, like, collect everyone's approval or their ideas. I now know that, as a result of my uprooting, I was taught not to trust my own instincts or emotions, and it took me years to understand what trusting my own voice meant. Looking back, I know that certain points in my life I was completely co dependent my relationships. I mean, I wouldn't even choose an outfit without getting my partner's input first, I'd constantly be asking, What do you think of this? And I'd be desperate for their input. I don't know if I was like until the past couple years that I had the revelation that I could completely just dress for myself, and it's relatively that it took that long that I wasn't just dressing for myself, but other I needed other people's approval. So when I moved into my current apartment, it became this beautiful celebration of owning my aesthetic. And for the first time, I bought things simply because they spoke to me, not because I needed someone else's stamp of approval. And that might seem like a small victory, but when this apartment came together, I saw how perfectly reflected who I am, and there was this incredible joy and be able to say, This is my space. This is me. 

Anthony Catalino  02:47

I love that. I mean, I think that's something that everyone can compare, you know, compare to, not that we want to compare, but we can relate to. Maybe that's a better word. I mean, like, I literally don't buy clothes anymore unless when I wear them, I feel outstanding, because I used to be lost in that whole idea of like, oh, I want to impress other people, or dress for like, make make sure I look good for other people. It's about my confidence. We're going inward these days. We're not so much focusing our attention on outerly people, outerly opinions, outerly thoughts. 

Arturo Diaz  03:19

Yeah, it's fascinating, because nowhere in our education system is their class and trusting your intuition, no teacher ever sat me down and said, Hey, Arturo, that gut feeling you have, that's your compass. But I've come to understand that intuition is one of our greatest resources. It's like this universal truth that we've somehow lost touch with along the way. Somewhere in our human involution, we stop listening to that inner voice, and that's the thing, your intuition will guide you if you just allow it, if you create that space to connect with it, it's always there. We just need to learn how to listen again. 

Anthony Catalino  03:49

I heard someone recently talk about how your intuition is actually another sense,

Arturo Diaz  03:53

You mean, like sight, smell, hearing, taste and touch? 

Anthony Catalino  03:56

Intuition is another sense, and it's almost like it's been stripped of us, but our little our bodies always speaking to us. Our higher self is always speaking to us. But I think where we get lost is the the disconnect from our body, because we focus more on the noise inside of our mind, which is just programming that's, you know, it's a conglomerate of everything you've experienced, most, most things you've experienced in life, mind you as a child, ages two to 12, you're in hypnosis, and so your subconscious is just being filtered with information, most of which you don't choose what you want to hold on to, like if you're unconscious about it. So we were not really guided to trust ourselves, yeah, instead trust other people and where has that got us? 

Arturo Diaz  04:43

Well, the tricky part is learning to distinguish between your mind with its ego driven fears and desires, and your intuition, which is your pure internal wisdom. From my own experience, I've learned to recognize these two very distinct voices my mind operates from a place of fear, making everything feel urgent and overwhelming. It screams panic, but my inner wisdom, it's different. It's calm, it's clear and simply says you already know what to do. Arturo and that real world, real work, is learning to tune into that wisdom like you're adjusting a transistor radio, filtering out the static of the fear driven mind. I'm curious, Anthony, in your life, when has your intuition let you down an unexpected path?

Anthony Catalino  05:31

I mean, I just, I know I like I'm so, I wouldn't say sensitive, but I'm so in tune with myself more than ever, I can walk into a room and know I don't need to be there, or I could be in someone else's presence and know that it's not for me. Yeah, like the energy, whether it's from a hook up, anything really just, you know, it's, it's almost like trusting, like that dark alley, like your body will tell you not to go down there. And nine times out of 10, I know my past self, I would, I would still take the chance, take the risk. And, you know, I think, I think not listening to my intuition at times made the lesson harder. For sure, maybe that's what I signed up for. Maybe that's what I needed to learn. You know, I didn't want to listen the first or 10th time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 

Arturo Diaz  06:22

You know that really resonates with my experience of moving to New York City. I just wrapped up this magazine job in Berlin, and I was supposed to go back to San Francisco. And in fact, I had never even been to New York, but the idea of going back to SF was boring to me, and I knew at that point that I wanted to get a job in media, and so I said, let's just do New York. And there was a voice that said that it was like an internal voice that was very clear, and said, You're meant to be in New York City. Now it didn't make any sense logically, because I didn't have any media contacts. I had no apartment lined up, nothing concrete, but what made my heart sing was, wasn't the practical path, it was New York City. Here's the magic of following that intuition. The moment I arrived, it was like New York City said you made the right choice, and we've got you an apartment appeared, connections materialized, and that kept having these incredible conversations with strangers. That felt destined to happen was this beautiful serendipity, where everything I was asking for just floating to my path. It felt like a direct dialog with the universe. I've expressed a desire, and boom, there it was. But there's a flip side to all this, too. When I have let my mind's fears take the wheel, it becomes a downward spiral. One fear will feed another, and before you know it, I feel like I'm caught up in this web anxiety. It's really hard to break free, well, free from that's why trusting your intuition isn't just about making choices, it's about choosing which voice you're going to listen to. 

Anthony Catalino  07:57

Oh, hands down. I think everyone here can relate, because it's just part of the experience. I was literally were doing some journaling, I think, last night, and was thinking about how my mind used to be, fluttered, filtered, flooded with noise, yeah, and through the practice of meditation over the years and being present and being with myself, mind you, most queer men or most other people I talk to, they don't meditate, they don't they don't practice all the things that that I feel have been incredibly beneficial to me. Now, I could have taken that two ways. I could have continued to believe in myself and continue to believe in the practice which I have, thank God, because I feel free now. Or I could have listened to well, you know, well, they don't, they don't agree with it, they don't think it's right, they don't think it's necessary or helpful. And so I could listen to their own opinions and fear based knowledge or their uncertainties of of what is good for them. I mean, I know it was a while ago, but do you recall when you were making that leap from San Francisco to New York if you got like, backlash, or were people like for it, or, you know where people like, Oh, you don't, don't go there. That's a big city, this, this and that. And you know what I mean, like feeding them their fears. 

Arturo Diaz  09:11

Oh, my God. My parents were totally panicked. They're like, what are you doing? All I could tell them at the time was, I don't know how to explain this, but I knew with absolute certainty that my future is in New York City. Oh, I was like 20 or 21 at the time. It's probably helped, because there's fearlessness in youth that we lose as we get older. You start thinking opportunities are more limited with age. But I'm here to tell you stop that bullshit: opportunities are limitless if you believe they are. Now I had to remind myself of that just yesterday, when the election results came in and things didn't go my way. I caught myself and thought, hold up. I'm letting anyone else write the end of the story. Life continues, while the dream might change. We keep on dreaming. Yeah, looking back now, I'm Crystal Clear that moving to New York was exactly the right thing. I am who I meant to be today because of that choice, that terrifying, exhilarating, instrumental choice, my internal wisdom basically said, bitch, you're moving to New York, and I see that with all the self love in the world, that's how we call it, radical self trust. People might question you. You might think you're crazy when you say, I just know I'm meant to do this. But when you truly believe in that inner voice, not the fearful mind, but that deep knowing other people's opinions become background noise,

Anthony Catalino  10:23

The inner voice from your heart, not from your program mind.

Arturo Diaz  10:27

Yeah,

Anthony Catalino  10:28

that's very important, very distinctive, that you don't just listen to what's been repeating in your mind, particularly if it's daunting or it's hunting or it's belittling you. You are a powerful mofo, yes. K,

Arturo Diaz  10:44

yeah.

Anthony Catalino  10:46

Now this might be selfish, but I like to believe that you maybe moved to New York when I moved to New York so we could party our faces off, only 20 years later or so to discover one another again, reconnect, and now we're on this beautiful path of helping our community realize the truth about themselves, to help them trust themselves more, become more aware of themselves. I think that's one of the most beautiful things for us, to step up share our experience, be unafraid, regardless of who's taking control over the president. See, yeah, yes, you know, like I still want to trust myself, regardless of all that outside noise, and the more that I do trust myself, I've realized that no one out there is going to change me. It's all about beating to the drum of my own heart. We've been so conditioned to believe that external circumstances, external this, that is going to affect us, and it will affect us if we allow it to. But the more I go inward, the more we have these conversations. No one out there is going to fix me, heal me, change me. They might inspire change, but I'm not going anywhere. 

Arturo Diaz  11:57

Yeah, I do want to talk about something important, as someone who dealt with childhood trauma, and I say that not to be defined by it, but because, because I am much more than that. But I think it's important to know that when you have childhood trauma, you learn early on not to trust your body. It's because trauma creates this disassociation that cuts you off from your internal wisdom and leaves you stuck in fear based thinking in your mind. Well, part of my healing journey has been reconnecting with myself and meditation has been an absolutely transformative resource. It taught me how to come back into my body, how to let my emotions flow through me instead of blocking them. See when you come from trauma, you develop this habit of stopping intense emotions before they can move through you. You avoid them, but that avoidance, it blocks you from so much, from your intuition, from the full human experience. And that here's the thing, even if you don't have trauma in your background, you might still be disconnected in ways you don't realize. Look how many people are caught in this endless cycle of dopamine hits from their phone constantly scrolling through Tiktok. They're completely disconnected from their internal dialog, not the mind chatter, but that deeper heart wisdom. So when Anthony suggests meditation or walks in nature, it might sound woo or just simply, simple, but these practices are powerful tools for cutting through the noise and bs of the world. They create the space to just truly listen to yourself, or give yourself a space to be. 

Anthony Catalino  13:24

Remember, we're a human being, not a human doing, not a human thinker, like it's all about beingness, like being who you are, not the conditioned, lacking hurt body experience that you've had so far remind you you're not alone. We've all gone through the ringer. Art may have had some more trauma than you, maybe or maybe some more than me, but we've all had trauma. We all have things that we need to work from, invest our time into, because that's what life's about. It's about learning and growing. It's about having experiences. I think what's also important remember is we came from nature like, like, not that long ago there was not social media, not that long ago you had to hunt for your own food. Not that long ago there wasn't an automobile. You didn't have the leisure to drive and just let the wind blow in your hair and feel the finesse like we like this. They say it's the best time to live right now. Yet, why are so many people in pain and suffering like literally, there's an abundance everywhere, an abundance of everything, an abundance of opportunities, abundance of experiences to be had. Yet we get so caught in our mind rather than our heart. Yes, that's why there is power. I took a walk yesterday with Johnny after hearing waking up to the news about who became our president. It wasn't our first choice, but it is the choice that a lot of people made. We're still alive to talk about it. We went outside, and that walk for 45 minutes was so healing. And it's it's almost like a subtle differences that you notice, but there's magic there. I don't say that just to blow smoke up your hoo ha, yeah,

Arturo Diaz  15:07

You know, there's this fascinating paradox we're living in. We have this we have more information at our fingertips, yeah, than ever before in human history. But when we ask ourselves those big life questions like, what's my purpose? What's my next move? Is this whatever they want? I think our first instinct is to dive into this vast ocean of media, looking for answers. And sure, sometimes that external knowledge can be helpful, but the real kicker the answers that we're searching for usually right here in that quiet space within ourselves and the most powerful thing you can do is simply check in and listen. It's so beautifully ironic. It's simultaneously the easiest and the hardest thing to do. The simplest solution is the one that we resist the most.

Anthony Catalino  15:56

 It's become easier for us because we've been doing it for so long. But like, How often would you suggest people check in with themselves? And what does that look like? 

Arturo Diaz  16:04

Every day, absolutely every day. But let me be real with you. I've been doing this forever, and just yesterday I was fighting with on meditation practice. My brain was like, no, no, we need to stay on Tiktok and watch everyone's elections reactions. I've literally had to have this conversation to my mind and be like, Babe, I need to step aside. I need to check in with myself. Like it felt like it took a full hour for me to finally settle into my meditation. And this is someone who does it daily. Sometimes your brain likes to fight you

Anthony Catalino  16:30

But there ain't no fight that you will, that you you will lose if you continue to show up and remember, we don't necessarily want to fight because we want to appreciate our mind for warning us or being incessant, or, you know, being on repeat, my mind you should be on repeat. So bad.

Arturo Diaz  16:46

Well, also, like the dopamine fix is real. Have compassion with yourself and understand that your compulsion to do that stuff is, like, driven by true or dopamine addiction. Like these things are engineered to be addictive

Anthony Catalino  17:00

Okay, so how do we? How do we? I don't want to interrupt, but I want to keep this ball moving. I want to get I want to give our listeners some great insights or some great tools that they can focus on so that they can trust their self more they can follow their intuition. 

Arturo Diaz  17:13

Okay, so first off, I'd say, learn to trust yourself after making past mistakes, because you all make mistakes, and the mistakes are actually part of the process of growing. A lot of us tend to obsess about the mistakes or failures that we had, and then we undermine confidence in ourselves. But you have to see that those mistakes and failures were just lessons that you had to learn. They're all part of the process. 

Anthony Catalino  17:38

Yeah, and I even think like if you could, if you could make a list of all the things that you expected to be different, or you expected to pass that test, and you didn't make a list of all the so called external expectations that you had for yourself. Maybe there were mistakes that you made. Maybe there were other people's opinions of how you should live. Create that list and spend some time, yes, in silence, not on your phone, but just with the list, because all those things you're really attached to, and attachments really cause pain suffering. That's not a loving thing to yourself when you're attached to these external expectations. Because, like we said the beginning of this call, no one out there is going to fix you, change you. It's all an inside job. So the more you can be with the so called external expectations. Sit with it, allow the allow the energy in your body to just pass and feeling them out. I know it sounds like a really weird concept, but feeling them out in that moment. Oh, that was someone else's belief. That wasn't my belief. I was told I need to go good grades in order to be good enough. But is that really true? Because I did terrible in school, I didn't even go to college, and I'm a pretty fucking awesome person. But what did that? What else did I need to tie into? All that was courage. Can you talk a little bit about courage or confidence in building self trust within one oneself? 

Arturo Diaz  18:58

I mean, I think that courage and self confidence are really a daily practice. It's about consistently reminding yourself that you are your own greatest resource and ally. It takes positive affirmations, celebrating your achievements and constantly remembering your power. We all have a choice. We can choose to focus on all of our incredible qualities and accomplishments, or we can fixate on what we perceive to be our failures, and the beautiful thing is that it's our choice. We have so much autonomy in how we conduct our lives, but somehow our default setting is often tuned to negativity and scarcity. And you can wake up and say, today, I'm going to rise today is going to be incredible, because I am powerful, and I have a lifetime of evidence to prove it. Achievements. Love growth. And here's what's fascinating, is that when you start living in a line with your internal wisdom, your body responds. It feels physically good when you're honor yourself in your inner voice, sometimes just following that feeling can be your compass,

Anthony Catalino  20:03

leading, leading by the feeling. Once you get good at I think you have to get good at what you're feeling first, because a lot of times people might be feeling fear, like, do we lead with a fear? Or do we realize that it's just our body's way of responding to something that's uncomfortable, and then we spend time in that space, because I know what you were getting at. Feel the feelings, feel them that like, like, go with it, but we also don't want to get lost in the noise from our mind, because we want to, we want to more so connect to the feeling in our heart. Yeah, 

Arturo Diaz  20:34

Did you have any thoughts on how to build confidence? 

Anthony Catalino  20:36

Confidence, courage? I love what you said about affirmations. I know a lot of people. I've been doing affirmations for years. I think it's great to surround ourselves with people that pop us up, inspire us. If you feel like you're getting lost in the the the noise of social media, start following more people like Art and myself that you know, like anytime I I crave the dopamine hits, because I'm human too, and they happen to all of us in our own ways. Everyone that's in my feed is helpful information, wisdom, boosting my confidence, my courage. I will say that anytime I want to be courageous, you got to lean into that fear, a little bit that discomfort, just kind of like building a muscle. I'm sure we've talked about building a muscle a lot. It doesn't necessarily feel great to lift heavier weights, but you can't just keep on lifting the same five pound dumbbell and expect to get bigger. You got to put your mind into it. You had to put your heart into it. You got to continue to build the reps. Boost yourself up. Yes, King! 

Arturo Diaz  21:35

That's what I said yesterday, too. Hope is a muscle that you need to flex. Things are not always going to go your way. But that isn't when we give into despair. Giving in to despair is giving up or we're not giving up, right? 

Anthony Catalino  21:47

Hell fucking No. I mean Art like, how long have we been talking about doing this podcast? 

Arturo Diaz  21:52

Forever and ever? 

Anthony Catalino  21:54

I'm gonna look at my notes right now. We've been we've been connected for quite some time now, but also it was a little over a year ago, we're like, let's do this. Let's do this. And it was meeting after meeting after. Are we sure about this? Is there some uncertainty? Of course, you know, it didn't happen overnight. So life doesn't happen overnight. It took it started with an idea. Maybe we're sparking an idea in some of your heads, some of your minds, some of your hearts. Right now, you want to make changes, but to please, don't expect you to be the different person tomorrow. You have to relearn how to trust yourself. You have to relearn how to build that courage, that confidence, because maybe you were not taught the accurate way to do it, or something. 

Arturo Diaz  22:34

Yeah, we all come to this from different paths. Maybe you had a parent who denied your reality, who didn't let you feel the emotion you needed to feel, whatever your story is. We've all ended up here today, right now, is when you can decide, I'm the author of my own program. I get to chart my own course. I get to decide the kind of life I'm going to live. And the most powerful thing you already have, everything you need within yourself,

Anthony Catalino  22:59

Yeah, and so and so. Just a quick topper on building courage. Say it, write it. Every morning I write my journal and I empower myself. Today, I'm going to choose me today. I'm going to be courageous. I am is who you are, the truth of who you are, not the conditioned self, not the hurt self, not the not the starving self, starving for attention or expectations? No, that's all noise. So write it, say it, speak it. And by the way, we smell, we touch, we taste, we see and we hear. Intuition is a sixth one. And how many of you moving forward from today are going to commit to your sixth sense, your intuition, trusting yourself, I know I'm gonna show up more. That's why I love having these conversations. That's why I'm so appreciative of Art, and I continuing to show up to these calls. Anything else before we go, big boy? 

Arturo Diaz  23:50

Well, buttercups, I will say that through radical self trust is a level of freedom that you did not know was possible, and ultimately that is the goal of all of this, 

Anthony Catalino  24:00

A level of freedom that you never thought was possible. Fuck yeah!

Arturo Diaz  24:04

Before we wrap up today, want to give you some concrete steps you can start taking right now to cultivate radical self trust. First, start with a daily check. In practice, take just five minutes each morning before you grab your phone, put your hand in your heart, take three deep breaths and simply ask yourself, what do I need today? The answer might surprise you. Second, create a trust track record. Keep a small journal or notes on your phone where you document the time your intuition was right. Could be as simple as had a feeling about taking that side street and avoided traffic, or as profound, as knew that job wasn't right. For me, this builds evidence for your inner wisdom. Third, practice the pause when you're faced with a decision everyone's given their opinion. Take a beat. Let me sit with that and give yourself the space to feel your own truth before responding. Fourth, and this is crucial. Start small. Build trust like you build a muscle. Maybe it's choosing your own outfit without approval or deciding on lunch without checking Yelp reviews. Baby steps. Create big changes. Finally, remember this mantra we love my inner wisdom speaks in whispers, not shouts. The more you listen, the clearer that voice becomes, 

Anthony Catalino  25:10

Yes King, mind you. We're not medical professionals. We're not doctors. We're just here to talk about our story and share some wisdom and experience that we've learned in our lives, because you deserve to hear it. Thank you all for listening. Yes, King, until we meet again, 

Arturo Diaz  25:22

Until next time, later!