From Heartbreak to Healing | Repurposing Rejection with Country Artist & Worship Leader Hope Shanley

Summary:
In this episode, Cecily interviews Hope Shanley, a country artist and worship leader, about her music career and how she has repurposed rejection. Hope shares her top hits and current projects, as well as her experiences as a performer and worship leader. She also opens up about a season of rejection in her life and how it led her to draw closer to God. Hope emphasizes the importance of trusting in God's plan and finding healing and restoration in Him. This conversation explores the pain of rejection and the process of repurposing that pain. The speakers discuss their personal experiences with rejection and the challenges they faced in seeking resolution. They also delve into the importance of forgiveness and coping mechanisms for dealing with rejection. The role of faith and the deepening of one's relationship with God in overcoming rejection is highlighted. The conversation emphasizes the significance of community in providing support and accountability. The lack of value for community in society is addressed, along with the power of community in overcoming addiction and grief. The speakers discuss the process of repurposing the fear of rejection and trusting in God's plan. The unshakable awareness of Jesus' love and the importance of Christian community are emphasized as key factors in navigating rejection.

Takeaways:

• Hope Shanley is a country artist and worship leader, known for her songs 'Blood Runs Deeper' and 'All Yours'.
• Performing in secular arenas and leading worship present different challenges, but both require vulnerability and a reliance on God.
• Rejection can bring out the worst in us and make us question our worth, but it can also lead us to a deeper dependence on God.
• Trusting in God's plan and surrendering our own desires can lead to healing and restoration. Rejection can be incredibly painful, especially when it comes from someone close to you.
• Seeking resolution and forgiveness is important in overcoming the pain of rejection.
• Coping mechanisms, such as focusing on the good and relying on one's faith, can help navigate the pain of rejection.
• Christian community plays a vital role in providing support, accountability, and a sense of belonging.
• Repurposing the fear of rejection involves anchoring one's worth and value in Jesus' love and trusting in God's plan.

Keywords

• Healing
• Rejection
• Faith
• Forgiveness
• Restoration
• Community
• Worship
• Trust
• Identity
• Hope

About Hope:
Hope Shanley is a country singer-songwriter from Massachusetts. She has released several tracks, including "I Will Always Love You," "Nightmares," and "Something in the Orange," which are available on her SoundCloud profile.
SOUNDCLOUD.COM
_On TikTok, under the handle @hopeshanleymusic, Hope shares music content and has garnered 4,859 followers and 61,000 likes.
TIKTOK.COM
_In April 2023, she per

Chapters

• 0:00 Introduction and Background
• 1:04 Hope's Music Career
• 4:05 Motivation and Accomplishments
• 6:32 Challenges of Performing and Leading Worship
• 8:35 Repurposing Rejection
• 12:35 Reactions to Rejection
• 22:37 The Pain of Rejection
• 24:01 Seeking Resolution
• 25:00 Learning to Forgive
• 26:22 Coping with Rejection
• 28:42 The Role of Faith

Transcript

Cecily (00:01.741)
Hi everybody and welcome to the Higher Pursuit Podcast. We are so glad that you're joining us today. If you are looking for content that will encourage you, build you up in your pursuit of Jesus, and sometimes challenge you, then you have tuned into the right podcast. In case you're new here, the series that we're in right now is called Repurposing Our Pain. And today I'm joined by a wonderful guest, Hope Shanley.

And if you don't know Hope yet, she is an amazing young country artist who is aspiring to take her career further while spreading the love of Jesus. And she's exploring her love for worship music in the process. Hope is a worship leader at her church and she has recorded some songs that I'm going to have her tell us about in a second. And so Hope, thank you so much for joining us on the podcast today.

Hope Shanley (00:54.338)
Thank you so much for having me. I'm super excited to chat more about all this fun stuff and to you who are new watching, welcome. My name's Hope and I can't wait for you to hear this.

Cecily (01:04.417)
That's awesome. So tell me, tell us a little bit about you. Like what have you recorded? I mean, I know there's probably a lot, so you don't have to tell it all. Like maybe some of the like top hits, things that people can find on Spotify and, and then what you, you know, what you're doing on your daily, daily day to day.

Hope Shanley (01:23.674)
Yeah, so I would say my biggest song right now that people seem to like is Blood Runs Deeper. That's actually my first country song that I put out ever. And there's also a music video to that. You can find it on Google, YouTube, all that stuff. So that was a pretty big hit. Definitely my staple song. And then I do have an album out called To the Moon and Back, if you like acoustic songs. And then I have my latest song.

Cecily (01:43.51)
Mm.

Hope Shanley (01:52.026)
All Yours, it's out now on everything. That's definitely one of my favorites. So go check that out, my latest release. My day to day right now, I am currently working on my music video for All Yours while also trying to figure out my first worship song. So hopefully in God's timing, I don't know when that will be, but stay tuned for that.

Cecily (02:01.09)
Nice.

Cecily (02:15.277)
Hmm

Awesome, awesome. So I'm gonna ask you an icebreaker question connected to music. So if you wrote a song about your life to this point, what would the title of the song be? And I'm pretty sure I know what genre of music it will fall under, but I'm just gonna ask you that anyway.

Hope Shanley (02:22.914)
that.

Hope Shanley (02:33.118)
Yeah, sure. It would definitely be country. I think a big part of why I went to country music was because of the, you know, just foundational aspects of like what country music is. So I feel like country music is a very like, raw, genuine, like strong hearted, you know, genre and feel so I feel like that's how I identify with it in my life.

Cecily (02:40.021)
Sure.

Hope Shanley (03:02.634)
If I had to pick a name for it, I'd probably go with, this sounds strange, but layers. Because just thinking, like looking back on my life, I guess I see it in different parts as like layers, kind of like every single thing that has happened in my life or that I've endured. Like I see it pretty plainly, like just how it's changed me after every single little thing. So.

Cecily (03:09.729)
Cool.

Hope Shanley (03:31.07)
I feel like layer on layer on layer on layer has made me who I am.

Cecily (03:35.837)
Okay, so folks, you heard it here first. The name of the song is Layers, and I have a feeling that's probably going to become a song. And if you hadn't thought about it yet, Hope, there you go. We're looking forward to hearing that song, because that's totally an awesome title. That's a great title, actually. Yeah, yeah, I can see you're a songwriter because you do really, really well, sort of like organically right in the moment. Hmm, what am I feeling? Layers, yeah, totally.

Hope Shanley (03:38.594)
Thank you.

Hope Shanley (03:44.247)
I'm going to cry.

Hope Shanley (03:53.806)
I don't know if I've heard that one before. So, yeah.

Hope Shanley (04:04.731)
Yeah.

Cecily (04:05.781)
That's great. All right, so is that what gets you out of bed in the morning? Is that sort of like the mission, the cause that makes your baby jump, you know?

Hope Shanley (04:14.81)
Definitely. I think, well I will say I still like a normal lazy young adult struggles to get out of bed but what keeps me going onto the next day for sure, yeah, that's always in the forefront of my mind because ultimately that's you know what I'm pursuing.

Cecily (04:35.093)
Yeah, absolutely. And so what are some accomplishments that you are super proud of? Maybe pick one that's obvious, maybe a couple that other people would be like, really, I didn't know that about.

Hope Shanley (04:50.988)
I don't even like using accomplishments. I don't know. I mean, I just, I don't know. I guess I don't keep track of these things, but since you're pointing it out, I guess I would say...

Cecily (04:54.753)
Okay.

Hope Shanley (05:06.706)
I would say when I flew to Nashville to meet, I'm not sure if I can say his name, I was under an NDA. But I flew to Nashville to meet this guy who wants to be my manager. And he is just an amazing, amazing person that I would love to work with and has worked with some of my favorite artists and connect them to where they are. So that was like huge that he...

Cecily (05:16.525)
Okay, someone.

Cecily (05:31.341)
Ow!

Hope Shanley (05:35.67)
found out who I was. And so I got to meet him by the grace of God. I don't know this, one of his agents found me on Instagram saying a cover, I think I was singing a Bailey Zimmerman song and it went into like a nine month process of like meetings and meeting him and stuff. So yeah, so that was huge.

Cecily (05:39.213)
How did that happen? Do you know?

Cecily (06:01.357)
Nice.

Hope Shanley (06:03.114)
So that was definitely really cool just for the recognition and like someone seeing that in me. Other than that, I'd probably say like landing on radio stations that I listened to growing up like Country 1025 and 1017, the bowl. I always listened to those growing up and I've now been on both multiple times. So it's really cool. Yeah, but I just, I don't like to say accomplishment referring to myself because I just feel like

Cecily (06:08.055)
I'm out.

Cecily (06:24.701)
Yes. Yeah.

Hope Shanley (06:32.194)
none of this would happen without God. So there's absolutely nothing I did for this to happen. I feel like, you know.

Cecily (06:38.965)
That's amazing. I have been hearing that from so many people recently. I just had a pre-interview conversation with a guy that's down in Florida. He does, he's a recovery coach and he's, and he's just like really kind of flowing and going for God. And he was sharing his, his story, like his path and, um, you know, his, his book was number one on Amazon. Uh, he has, he gets flown to coach politicians and like all these things.

And I'm like, wow, that is so amazing. What was your plan? He said, there really wasn't one. It just sort of like all started unfolding. And what he said, and this is what I thought was so great. He said, I just said, Lord, I'm all in. Jesus, my life was a wreck and you rescued me out of this disaster. And I mean, for him coming out of addiction, it was life or death.

Hope Shanley (07:13.706)
Yeah.

Cecily (07:36.341)
And so he said, you know, I am all in. I know, I don't want to like dip my toe into Christianity or be a, you know, a religious person. I really want the relationship with you, Jesus. And so because he was all in and because he dove in and was reading the word and attending church services and doing anything that God, any open door that God put in front of him to increase and deepen his relationship, he just dove in.

and just went through it. And so as a result, other doors started opening for him to not be a dead sea, but to give away what he was going inside of him. And so, you know, I sense that in you as well, in that everything that the Lord is putting on the inside of you, your heart is, well, I don't wanna just keep it. I wanna give it away, and your avenue is music.

which is so amazing, it touches the heart of God so deeply.

Hope Shanley (08:39.71)
Yeah, yeah, thank you. Appreciate it.

Cecily (08:42.097)
Yeah, it's so great. And so you are a worship leader. That's gotta be a very, very different thing because I've led worship, but I've never performed in a secular arena. And I know for me, getting over my nerves of worship leading was the fact that every time before I would lead worship, I thought, I have an audience of one. I literally, the only one I have to please is someone who loves me already. But getting up in front of a secular audience,

Hope Shanley (08:49.55)
Thank you.

Hope Shanley (08:54.536)
Yeah.

Cecily (09:11.881)
I think, I don't know if I could do that.

Hope Shanley (09:14.334)
Mm-hmm. Yeah, it's, oh, there goes my light. Sorry about that. We'll just deal with this for now, it's okay. Yeah, it's definitely very, very different. I mean, I guess it's, yeah, it's definitely a different feeling for sure. I mean, I've had, I guess you could say stage fright, which is weird, because I'm technically a performer, but you know, I grew up with that.

Cecily (09:17.269)
Yeah!

Cecily (09:20.601)
Okay, sounds good. You still look great.

Cecily (09:40.865)
No, I get it.

Hope Shanley (09:43.882)
you know, going on to my first stage. And like every single time I got onto a stage, like my nerves were so bad that like, I like felt like I was out of my body. And like, and I'd get done with the thing and I'd be like, you know, just like burst into tears. I'd be like, that was the worst day ever. And you know, like for whatever reason, like nobody else felt that way, which was still mind boggling to me, because like for me, it felt like it was just like the worst ever.

Cecily (09:54.038)
care.

Cecily (10:03.37)
Oh

Cecily (10:09.517)
Oh my gosh.

Cecily (10:13.865)
Are we the same person? Because I feel like you are completely talking about so many of my own experiences, it's crazy.

Hope Shanley (10:21.147)
And so gradually, over the years, every single time I got back up to do it again, it went away more and more and more. I still get nervous a little bit when I'm performing in a secular place, but not really. I'm very, very comfortable now.

on the day sometimes, but in terms of worship, it's funny because I have been doing worship consistently for six years in front of my church, and I still get nervous. And it's like a constant, constant reminder. And like, I know this in my heart and soul that like, I'm not performing and that this is all for worship. And I don't think that my...

vision is clouded by feeling like I'm performing. I don't feel that way. But I think that when I'm worshiping is when I most feel the fear of God, because it's just very, very humbling to have to lead a congregation in worship. And sometimes when you're in that...

position like you have the enemy like attacking you like at all times like he's in my head like Who are you to saying? Who are you to tell them? You know, like what that thing you did, you know And so it's like just you got to block it block it block it But I mean, it's real. I feel like I've realized that it's just you know, like music is definitely my most like vulnerable thing about me so like Joining

Cecily (11:51.309)
Alright.

Yeah.

Cecily (11:57.386)
Yeah.

Hope Shanley (12:11.226)
my already most vulnerable thing about me with also my faith, which is the second or first most vulnerable thing about me. Like that's, you know, it's crazy. So I definitely still get very emotional and shaky when I'm up there on Sundays. And Sundays, some, some are different than others, but I mean, I still enjoy it so, so much.

Cecily (12:27.821)
No.

Cecily (12:35.245)
And I bet, like you said, your nerves are different for different reasons. Now, the thing that you and I decided we were going to chat about today was how you have repurposed rejection. And you're probably one of those people that, from the outside, people would be like, nobody's ever rejected her. She's adorable, she's outgoing, she's talented. She's already leading worship in a church. She's already a recording.

Hope Shanley (12:41.258)
Yeah.

Cecily (13:05.525)
people are calling her from Nashville. Like this girl has never lived my life. She doesn't know what rejection is about. So you gotta, you gotta sell this to us here. Talk to us about rejection.

Hope Shanley (13:16.374)
Yeah.

Oh, well, yeah, I think if you listen to my album, you'll believe it, but um, so

Cecily (13:25.835)
Are you that country music artist? Are you like a Taylor Swift? Like every breakup song is on there.

Hope Shanley (13:31.424)
Yeah, I threw it all out there for sure. Yeah, so I definitely had an instance or season of dealing with rejection that I'm honestly still dealing with. You know, this past year that has been very, very difficult to come out of.

Regardless, obviously, I think that my faith is really the only thing that has gotten me through this.

Hope Shanley (14:08.182)
But yeah, it was just a very, very unfortunate thing that happened in my life. I won't go into detail, but it's just something that's weighed very heavy on my heart and has been, again, just very difficult to cope with, but obviously I am. And I think that even in not understanding maybe why that happened, I also do,

I never got an answer from that person. Yes, yes, sorry.

Cecily (14:41.897)
And this was a relational rejection thing. I just, yeah, okay. So like some sort of a relationship that was important to you, you experienced rejection. Okay, which is normal. I mean, we've all gone through that. So that's what happened to you. And so even though you didn't get any explanation from this person, go on.

Hope Shanley (14:53.622)
Yes.

Hope Shanley (15:03.211)
Yeah, so it really made no sense at all, but at the same time, like, I understand why it happened kind of thing. It's hard to explain, but I think that God has revealed to me in the midst of, like, not knowing that, you know, like, even when it makes no sense and I don't know why that would happen and, like, nothing led to that, like, I can still see how, like, God had a different plan.

Um, and you know, this was something that like I would have, you know, truly like bet my life on, you know, but, but to be fair, like I really wasn't strong in my faith at that time. And I was just kind of doing whatever I wanted to. Um, and so that ultimately led to destruction. And, um, I think that, that the end of that needed to happen for me to draw closer to the Lord. And I don't think that

Cecily (15:59.523)
Oh.

Hope Shanley (16:00.602)
my relationship would have strengthened with my faith if that hadn't happened, at least not as quickly as it did. Because, you know, like, it may have looked like it on the outside, like, oh, we were going to church and all this stuff. But like, was I really, you know, prudent in prayer and listening to what God had for me? No, I wasn't because, you know, I was head over heels in love. Like, I was listening to my heart.

Cecily (16:09.121)
really.

Cecily (16:17.866)
Nice.

Hope Shanley (16:30.978)
But again, like God just sometimes has different plans. And when people can't give you the answers, like God will. So yeah, it's just been a slow season of like understanding and dealing, like, you know, it's like my good father, like taking care of me, like, it's okay, like, you know, holding me when I cry. And this is why, like, I know you don't understand now, but you'll understand soon.

Cecily (16:34.101)
Yeah.

Cecily (16:39.802)
Mm. Yeah.

Cecily (16:56.975)
Yes.

Cecily (17:01.13)
Yeah.

Hope Shanley (17:01.866)
Yeah, it's just trusting in the process. But yeah, I think that my biggest lesson out of that was just, I knew in my heart, that had to kind of happen for me to draw closer to God. Because coming out of that, it was like survival mode. I didn't know what to do with myself. So it's like, who are you gonna turn to? God, obviously, there's nothing else I could have done. So sometimes I think God will.

Cecily (17:15.809)
Mmm.

Cecily (17:20.737)
Yeah.

Cecily (17:25.312)
Yes.

Right.

Hope Shanley (17:31.846)
almost like bring you to rock bottom or like remove every thing from your life so that you can only rely on him. And yeah, and you'll see that a lot of other things too, yeah.

Cecily (17:38.794)
Yes.

Yeah, yeah, so.

Mm-hmm. So in some situations where I have experienced rejection, my first reaction, and tell me whether you went through this, my first reaction was to try to explain myself to the people, to try to get to the bottom of it. Like, okay, so you're rejecting me. So either you don't understand me or you're not understanding the situation because I mean, heck.

You don't really mean that you want to reject me. Like that would be terrible. So let me explain it. Let me fix it. Let me get in there. Let me work with this, work with this problem because this is unacceptable. Did you have any of those reactions of, I just got to dive in and try to fix this thing?

Hope Shanley (18:35.718)
I mean, initially when it was all physically happening, I lost my mind for sure and automatically was trying to explain and defend myself and then also turning it around, like what's wrong with you and what the actual heck, just absolute insanity, I will just tell you that. I definitely lost my mind in that moment and that doesn't happen for me.

Cecily (18:53.559)
Right?

Cecily (19:00.119)
Yeah.

Hope Shanley (19:04.93)
very much. So, but after that point, I pretty much just disappeared. So, and that was just kind of the end of that. So there wasn't really much room for like fighting for it. Yeah, it was just pretty much done.

Cecily (19:06.229)
Yeah.

Cecily (19:24.109)
So those emotions that you described, just feeling helpless and then also angry and blaming, and those are all totally the normal. It's sort of like there's a path through rejection, and it's not pretty. It brings out, generally brings out the worst in us. And I wrote in my book on the chapter on repurposing our rejection.

I wrote how rejection brings out the worst in us because deep inside, sometimes we question our worth. Even if we know that our worth and our value is in Christ, there's still a part of us that is like, yeah, but are we really? And when somebody rejects us, the enemy can come right in and say, see, I told you, you weren't worthy. I told you, you weren't good enough. I told you blah, blah.

Hope Shanley (20:12.386)
Yeah.

Hope Shanley (20:19.551)
Yeah.

Cecily (20:24.409)
It's almost like the Garden of Eden of all over again, like, have God really said? And, you know, like the temptation of Christ, have God really said? Just getting us to doubt what God has said about us, getting us to doubt our identity in Him. And the rejection seems to validate all the worst things. And that's a very horrible feeling, because it feels like the rug of a security.

Hope Shanley (20:40.558)
Mm-hmm.

Cecily (20:52.029)
of our identity gets pulled out from underneath us and we're just free falling. And that's a terrible feeling. But it sounds like you're saying now that you're glad for the free fall because of where you landed. So talk to us about how the free fall ended up in you landing in the arms of the Lord.

Hope Shanley (20:54.83)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Hope Shanley (21:08.385)
Yeah.

Hope Shanley (21:20.818)
I will say it's even hard for me now to say like, oh, I'm glad that it happened. Because I mean, I'm not, but I know that it was necessary. So there's definitely still is like grief coming from that, that God is still kind of, you know, healing me from and that he's restoring.

Cecily (21:31.916)
Yeah.

Hope Shanley (21:50.31)
I kind of thought I could do something on my own and kind of was like, oh, I'll talk to you later, God. See you like in a month or whatever. And then I land myself in a pit and he pulls me out and I know better. But we always think we know better. And like, it's just, yeah, you can't do it on your own. And I know that there was going to be a point where

Cecily (22:00.033)
Yeah.

Hope Shanley (22:19.926)
You know, I had to come back to my senses and know that, you know, he has plans for me. I don't have plans for myself. And yeah, he just really took me from there and hasn't let go of me. He never will. So.

Cecily (22:30.017)
Yes.

Cecily (22:37.741)
Absolutely, absolutely. I remember a time when my husband and I experienced rejection. It was so incredibly painful because of the closeness of the people involved. If the rejection had come from people that were, I don't know, acquaintances or church friends or neighbors or something, so much more tolerable.

But when it's somebody that is so close to you and you feel like I need you in my life, I've actually put all my eggs in this basket that this relationship is forever. You will never reject me. And then all of a sudden, they, yeah, you know, this is it. I will never reject you. You will never reject me. We'll have our hard times. We'll have difficult conversations. We'll have fights and we'll get through it. But you don't just reject me.

Hope Shanley (23:34.436)
Oh, yeah.

Cecily (23:34.741)
And that was just the blind side of that whole situation was so hard. And so then we thought, well, I know what we'll do. You know, we'll go talk to all the parties involved in this. And they, they wouldn't listen. I wrote then there's like that feeling of anger of hang on. We could have this whole solved. We can have this whole thing solved. We could have this drama done.

I could move on and not feel this rejection anymore. And you are killing me. I'm losing sleep over this. I can't eat over this. I can barely pray because I am in so much anger and I'm having to take my thoughts captive. I'm exhausted from this spiritual warfare right now. There's like nothing else going on in my life except this drama. And so, but if you won't listen to me, how are we gonna get through it? And it went on for months. I mean,

Hope Shanley (24:23.522)
Mm-hmm.

Cecily (24:30.789)
months and months and months when John and I thought, well, this will be over quick because of how close we are to these people. They obviously, they know us and they're this, they'll believe the best in us eventually, they'll come around. And it went on and on and on and on. And what the Lord showed us through that is that crucible of that season drove us to new levels of learning how to forgive.

that we would, I mean, for whatever reason, this pain was worse to us than both of our divorces. And both John and I had spouses that did the peace out cub scout, like we want someone else, not you. So we had both experienced pretty dramatic, painful rejection, but for whatever reason, this situation caused us even more pain. And so,

Hope Shanley (25:08.727)
Yeah.

Hope Shanley (25:21.038)
Mm-hmm.

Cecily (25:29.413)
It's tough when you're rejected by somebody that you thought would always love you, always believe the best about you, always be there. So that is definitely, definitely tough. So when you say you're still working through it, when all those feelings kind of like sneak up on you, and I'm assuming you're probably like most of us when you're hungry, angry, lonely, or tired, and then you're not.

Hope Shanley (25:54.573)
Yeah.

Cecily (25:56.821)
It's not like you just led worship, had the touch of God. You've got the kind of glory of the Lord all over you. And that's not when you're probably dealing with this. It's probably when you're having a bad day that all of a sudden you get blindsided again by these feelings. So what are you doing to not let the pain of the rejection turn you into a different person?

Hope Shanley (26:22.798)
Um, I, that's a, that's a good question. I think that I haven't really thought about how it could maybe turn me into a different person because I just see it as like it comes in waves and it goes back out and comes back in and it goes back out. Um, which isn't ideal, but I do know that that's not who I am and it doesn't consume me as much as it may feel like it does at times.

Cecily (26:36.193)
Mm.

Hope Shanley (26:51.898)
I'll always come back to myself and what's present in my life and what the joy I have in my life right now. It's just, I think it's like those late night car rides on the way home and I'm like, oh god, the song comes on. It all comes back or I can't sleep or something. But I wake up in the morning and I forget all about it. Or I get home and I...

Cecily (26:59.304)
Mm-hmm.

Cecily (27:14.698)
I'm here.

Hope Shanley (27:17.75)
people are at my house, I'm like, hey, we started a conversation and you know, that's out of my head. So it's

Cecily (27:22.313)
Yeah. So it sounds like you're causing yourself to focus on what you do have instead of what you lost.

Hope Shanley (27:29.214)
Yeah, I would say so. Yeah, yeah. And it happens subconsciously too. I won't even realize, you know, because again, it'll just sneak in and then like, as soon as I, you know, land, I stop the car and I get somewhere or whatever, like, you know, it's gone.

Cecily (27:32.417)
Mm-hmm.

Cecily (27:44.545)
So that doesn't happen with all people though. So just so you know, there are a lot of people who absolutely get stuck in those feelings and they can't get out of it. So you're doing some things and I think I wanna help us get there because you're doing things without even realizing it. That's helping you repurpose the pain. So the first thing that I heard you say is that you are focusing on the good.

so that you don't stay stuck in that pain, but you can move on to the very next thing that the Lord's bringing you to. And then now share with us how the Lord, your relationship with the Lord is playing into that, because I heard you say two things. First of all, that your relationship with Jesus has deepened, that you felt like you were sort of fringe out there, but this forced you back into his arms.

Hope Shanley (28:34.593)
Yeah.

Cecily (28:42.005)
And then second of all, I heard you say that you actually trust that even though this hurts, you didn't ask for this, you wish this wasn't your current valley, that you trust that he's working this for your good. That's huge right there. So talk to us about how you have that kind of faith.

Hope Shanley (28:59.341)
No.

Hope Shanley (29:04.646)
Um, I mean, it's definitely been a lifelong of building that kind of faith. Um, well, I say that as if there was like a time where I didn't have that same trust. I think that I've always had that trust in the Lord. Um, you know, obviously growing up in such an amazing, loving church, like in the testimonies I've seen and just being close with other believers, like, and just constantly hearing about how God works in their lives.

Cecily (29:09.901)
Mm.

Cecily (29:19.571)
Mm.

Hope Shanley (29:32.846)
and then also relaying it into my life, it's just never really been a question. That's what I've always been taught is like, when you're going through the valley, God can still move mountains and just that there is always, like I've always said, God doesn't allow pain without purpose. Again, repurpose your pain. That's just so beautiful.

Cecily (29:40.812)
Mm-hmm.

Cecily (29:52.619)
EEEE

Hope Shanley (29:59.41)
So I think that's just always been super instilled in me that, because it just would make no sense if, you know, God wouldn't just put you through the wringer for no reason, he's a loving God and he has great plans for you. So, and nothing bad comes from God. It's just, you know, we live in a bad world and you know, God's there to show us the good and bring us out of that. And it's very just.

Cecily (30:06.477)
Mm-hmm.

Cecily (30:13.761)
Yes.

Cecily (30:19.702)
Yes.

Cecily (30:23.597)
Mm-hmm.

Hope Shanley (30:26.782)
It's very apparent, because I know myself, it's very apparent when I'm doing something by my own will. I know where that gets me. And then I know when God comes in to swoop me off my feet and actually be like, okay, well follow me this time, and he takes care of the rest. So yeah, it's just, you know, when like, yeah, I don't know. I don't think there's a way to get that faith, because I've seen it.

Cecily (30:32.642)
Mmm.

Yeah.

Cecily (30:43.635)
Yeah.

Cecily (30:46.891)
Yeah.

Cecily (30:51.79)
when you're doing it in your own strength.

Hope Shanley (30:56.182)
You know? Yeah.

Cecily (30:57.097)
Yeah, that's awesome. So just for our listeners and the audience that's listening right now, there's a couple of things that, nuggets that Hope just dropped on you and I hope you picked up on it. The first one is that there is an enemy who is the one who brings the bad things. And plus the sinfulness of just us as individuals. We're still broken in certain areas and so we break each other. It's just what human beings do.

And so rejection is going to come because we live in a broken world. So there's no way that we can avoid rejection. In fact, Jesus even said, if you live for me, expect rejection. Because if the world hated me and you look just like me, you can expect more of that. So like, oh, yay. I don't think I've ever seen that like on a t-shirt or a coffee cup, like bring on rejection or, you know, yay for persecution, but that's-

That is basically a promise that we can expect. And then the second thing that Hope said that I think is so key is the importance of community. I just want to like sort of amplify that in case you missed it, the importance of community, because I know for John and I, when we were going through that hard time in our family with all of that rejection drama.

our church family was there for us. Not that we sat there and like, kvecht and moaned and complained every single time we were together, but it was just them being there for us and reminding us, you really are good people. Like you're, you're good. You, you're loved. And then just being able to have a positive community to, I don't know, celebrate with shoulders to cry on. And then like Hope was saying,

You hear testimonies just in the day to day of being involved in a Christian community. You see what God is doing in other people's lives and it builds your faith to say, okay, well maybe it's not right now, but God is moving. And so if he did it for them, he'll do it for me. So Christian community is super, super important. I hope, what do you think about that? How do you, how much do you value Christian community?

Hope Shanley (33:20.062)
I actually just real quick want to mention that I think I've told you about this, but if you're anywhere near the Totten area in Massachusetts I'm wearing their merch right now. The Center on Main is our in-process community center that we're building. Still under renovation, but we're open for a church on Sundays. So we have church there, but it's also a community center. So it's gonna be something for everyone and there's gonna be a coffee shop and

Cecily (33:34.08)
Oh, cool.

Hope Shanley (33:47.914)
and a game room and all this stuff, a place for conferences. I'm doing a movie night there in a couple of weeks. And when I tell you like, ever since we sold our traditional little church in Southeast, and you know, I've been there my whole life, but you know, we decided to take a risk and follow what God was leading us to. And we got this community center. And just ever since then, it's just everyone has just been like having the time of their lives really.

Cecily (33:53.581)
Oh my gosh.

Hope Shanley (34:16.666)
Um, it's just been so refreshing and there's just always something going on that we can work on a project together at, um, there. It's just, I'm so, so excited for this to be, you know, fully fledged for community to really gather there more than it already is. Um, but I will say like this also happened in like the perfect timing because as we started building this community center, this was like right when, you know, this rejection had hit me also. So like.

I was just swarmed with so much love and community at that time, and I still am. And it's just really been a very exciting chapter in my life, and I can probably say that for everyone else in the congregation that's been helping out too. So it's really important.

Cecily (35:02.493)
Yes, it is so important. And when we had been talking the other day, you and I were chatting about how in today's day and age, people don't value community. It's almost as if our society is doing everything it can to keep people in isolation. I mean, COVID was the big, huge, blatant, you're in isolation and you can't come out and we won't let you come out and we won't let you have community.

Hope Shanley (35:22.69)
Yeah.

Cecily (35:32.333)
And people found ways to try to preserve or protect the shred of community that they could have. But so many people, like I don't know about your church, but so many people have not reconnected to the local church. I think we're probably better off than a lot of churches as far as the rebound of people who have come back and re-engaged in ministries within the church that have restarted and all of that.

I don't know whether it is the whole texting. I mean, you go to a restaurant and you see two people on a date and they're both on their phones. Like, what are you texting each other? Or why are you texting someone else? Like, why are you checking your likes on Instagram when you are across from a real person? I just feel like our society is just so geared towards

Hope Shanley (36:15.899)
I can't.

Cecily (36:30.701)
to connect and not valuing community. So I'm so excited to hear, first of all, because you're considerably younger than me, probably decades. And so to hear someone in your age bracket value community so much, I think that's really refreshing. Yeah.

Hope Shanley (36:32.108)
Yeah.

Hope Shanley (36:42.253)
Yeah.

Hope Shanley (36:52.566)
Yeah, definitely just been refreshing to be around. I mean, I've always had community from my church, but now it's just like, it's just growing so much and it just feels so abundant. And there's just, you know, if we're not doing something with that, you know, like we'll go over and break bread together with, you know, like we were blessed, me and my friend, we were blessed by, you know, two different homes feeding us dinner.

Cecily (37:06.335)
Mm-hmm.

Hope Shanley (37:21.386)
this week and you know we usually have one or two homes we go to each week to just gather and eat and like anyone's welcome and it's just you'd be so surprised like just how much of a difference that makes in your life and just how refreshing it is to be with people and just like have real conversations and prepare for someone it's just people don't do that anymore and it's just it's so great I love it.

Cecily (37:37.389)
Preach that!

Cecily (37:43.159)
Yeah.

Cecily (37:50.237)
It is so great. And so in the past couple of weeks, as I have been doing pre-interviews and also recording back recordings for podcasts, I've been talking with people. And like, for instance, the guy I just mentioned, who is the sobriety coach, he was talking about how when he came out of addiction, if it was not for community, he would not have survived. He said there's no way that he could have gotten sober and stayed sober.

outside of community. So there's that story. Then second of all, I was talking with this young lady whose mother committed suicide two years ago and the grief and just the whole weariness of the grief process. And she said, like I asked her, so what are the lessons? Like what are some of the tools you have in your tool belt now that you could share with someone that is going through the same kind of thing you're going through? And she said, you know, she, one of her tools was

get in community because community did, she said almost word for word what you said, that was where she found encouragement. It's where people surrounded her, brought meals. She was able to get into Bible studies, which yes, it was kind of a distraction, but it also built her faith and put her mind on things that would actually build her up rather than the thoughts of things she couldn't change.

Hope Shanley (38:49.57)
Mm-hmm.

Cecily (39:16.545)
that we're just tearing her down. So community is so important. And to tie this all back to like bring this right on back to rejection, for those of you out there who are suffering with rejection, one of the things you might not wanna do is get involved in community because there's this lie that we think that we're protecting ourselves from rejection if we stay in isolation. But here's the thing.

Hope Shanley (39:16.589)
Yeah.

Cecily (39:44.997)
You can't protect yourself from rejection 100%. None of us can. And the very thing that you need when and if rejection or any emotional pain comes into your life is the thing that you might be isolating yourself from. And that is healthy and I say preferably godly community. It's so important.

Hope Shanley (40:09.994)
Mm-hmm.

Cecily (40:12.145)
And it also, another thing about community is that it helps us to protect from the chameleon syndrome, where we morph into whatever we think that the people around us need or want us to be and lose touch with our true self. If you're in a true godly community, they call out the real you. They celebrate the real you. With all the good, with all the bad, with all the ugly.

It's where you can actually go to find who you really are and express it. Do you feel that way? Do you feel like you're more of the real you?

Hope Shanley (40:47.164)
Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. And yeah, it definitely just, it makes you want to be the real you, nonetheless. And it's also just great for accountability. I'm someone like I know I need accountability, and I need people to kind of hold me to certain standards, or I'll just

Cecily (41:04.534)
Mmm.

Hope Shanley (41:13.582)
I'll fall short. Because I just know myself and not everyone is like that. But for me, it really is like a healthy, the more I surround myself with these sorts of people and things that I involve myself in, just the more joyful and on fire and motivated I feel. And it's just so evident when you surround yourself with that sort of environment and people. It's just really like.

Cecily (41:26.611)
Yeah.

Hope Shanley (41:43.05)
You know, I feel like people have told me like I'm glowing when I'm just all around it, you know, and you really just, it's such a joyful thing and such a blessing.

Cecily (41:53.485)
That is so awesome. That is so great. So just to kind of recap for everyone who's listening, we repurpose the experience of rejection. We can't actually repurpose rejection because rejection itself is something that we're gonna experience all our lives, but we can repurpose the fear of rejection into an unshakable awareness of Jesus' love for us.

Hope Shanley (42:18.734)
Yeah.

Cecily (42:23.177)
and we can anchor our worth and our value in Him. And then the fear of rejection won't attach itself to us or imprison us in unhealthy mindsets and behaviors. Additionally, we can reach out to community and we can start to see ourselves through the eyes of people who believe the best about us, who are there to call out the gold in us.

like Hope said, to hold us accountable in all the best and good ways. So is there anything that you wanna add, Hope, before I kinda close this out in prayer?

Hope Shanley (43:04.942)
I think the only thing I'll say is just, when you don't know why something is happening, it doesn't change who God is, and it doesn't change the fact that He is working. He's never not working. So when things feel still in life and you feel stuck, even though you can't see it, God is always working. And I know it can still be discouraging, but try to be encouraged by the fact that

Cecily (43:15.298)
so good.

Hope Shanley (43:34.538)
He is good no matter what the circumstances are in our lives and he is always working for a plan in our lives. So just know that and try to find peace in that.

Cecily (43:43.158)
Yeah.

That was, that's a huge wisdom bomb right there, guys. That even if you can't see it, he's working. How does that bad bridge go in Waymaker? You know that song?

Hope Shanley (43:57.734)
Oh yeah, even when I don't see that you're working. Even when I don't see that you're working, yep.

Cecily (44:00.649)
Yeah.

Can you sing that for us, girl? Can we get like a free Brit?

Hope Shanley (44:06.299)
No, I can't sit there right now. Maybe I'll post a cover, but I'm not going to post a cover right now.

Cecily (44:09.145)
Dang it! There you go, there you go. Oh sure, okay. Well, it is the truth, and nonetheless, even though she won't sing it, it is the truth that even when we can't see it, he's working. Even when we're still walking through the valley of the shadow of death, we don't have to fear evil, because it says,

Hope Shanley (44:21.878)
Right.

Cecily (44:37.557)
He is our, Jesus is our good shepherd. And if you're trying to walk through a season of rejection without Jesus, more power to you, but I don't see how you can repurpose the fear of rejection outside of knowing that number one, that God is good. And the only way you can know that is truly to be his, to truly give him your heart and your life, to truly say, I've tried it my way long enough.

Hope Shanley (44:37.559)
Yeah.

Cecily (45:06.877)
and it's not working. I've tried to talk my way out of this. I've tried to behave my way out of this. I've tried to manipulate the circumstances. Like I can't fix this and I certainly can't fix me. And to that Jesus says, that's fine. That's my business. That's my job and I'm really good at it. I'm really good at taking broken things and making something beautiful out of it. I'm really good at taking the ashes of the life that you've burned to the ground.

Hope Shanley (45:08.36)
Yep.

Cecily (45:35.313)
and reconstructing it into what I always designed for it to be. I am really good at taking somebody who's got a broken nose and resetting it into a better looking nose. I am the best God. I have got your best interest at heart. So I'm just going to pray for those of you who are going through a season of rejection right now. Heavenly Father, I just bring these precious people to you, Lord.

Hope Shanley (45:47.247)
Yeah.

Cecily (46:05.037)
that are experiencing rejection or just are coming through a season of rejection and feeling like it has got the best of them, that they can't sleep, they can't focus, they're just losing their mind over how they're feeling. The helplessness and the hopelessness and the waves of anger and depression that are a result, that come in the aftermath.

of rejection, sort of like aftershocks, after an earthquake. I'm asking Lord that you will speak peace to their storm, that you will speak peace to their heart. If they know you, Jesus, help them really free fall right into your arms to dive into learning what you are saying, hearing what you are saying, getting involved in good Christian community, not staying isolated anymore.

letting those walls of isolation come down and allowing you to show them through community and through hearing your voice that they are loved, they are accepted, that you've got this and help them not to leave this place of devastation without a revelation of your goodness. And for those who are listening who don't know you, Jesus, I am asking that you would make yourself so real to them in this season.

Move whatever mountain needs to be moved. Pull down whatever objections need to be pulled down. Bring people across their path that they will honor and they'll listen to that speak their language exactly the way they need to hear about your goodness, Lord. Do whatever you need to do to show yourself to them because you really are so loving, Lord. Who would die for a wretch like us when we were your enemy?

When we mocked you, you died for us, not when we had it all together. So I thank you for revealing that to the people who are listening. And we just pray all this in your name, Jesus. Amen. Well, Hope, I wish we could keep talking because there's so much more that I know you could share. And I wanna thank you so much for this great discussion and for sharing your story with us.

Hope Shanley (48:16.562)
Amen.

Hope Shanley (48:29.618)
Yeah.

Cecily (48:30.721)
Thanks. And before we sign off, folks, I want to invite our listeners to join the live Q&A discussion with Hope and me when it gets scheduled. So keep your eyes on my Instagram and Facebook to see when Hope and I will be hosting this live on Instagram. Because maybe you have questions about how her rejection impacted her life and you want to ask her specific questions about how she repurposed that rejection or

Maybe you've been doing this work with God and you want to share a part of your story. We'd love to hear about it. So in our Q&A, you're going to have the opportunity to do just that. Make sure to join us and share the link on all your social places so you and your friends and followers can join as well. And for now, I just want to thank you, our incredible tribe, for being a part of today's podcast. As always, we're here to help you and encourage you on your pursuit of Jesus.

So if anything you heard today blessed you, then please let us know in the comments. And also, don't just keep this to yourself. Be a conduit of blessing so other people can benefit. I encourage you to share what you learned with other people, whether that's on social media or during a conversation at the water cooler at work or hanging out with friends. And if you haven't already, subscribe to this podcast wherever you're listening to it, whether it's...

Spotify, Apple, YouTube, and also join my email list on my website, Hire so you can receive my newsletter and my blog. Guys, we are on a pursuit of more of Jesus together. None of us have arrived, that is for sure, but my goal for this podcast is always to offer you something nourishing that will strengthen, encourage you, and challenge you as you pursue Jesus.

Hope Shanley (50:11.819)
I'm sorry.

Cecily (50:23.497)
in the midst of your everyday life. So until next time, I pray that you'll walk in the favor of God, and we'll see you in the next episode. Have a wonderful day.

Hope Shanley (50:36.908)
Okay