The Seal and the Secret Place Change Everything

 LIVESTREAM EVENT: How the Seal and the Secret Place Change Everything 

This past weekend, I had the privilege of speaking at the Living as a Daughter of the King Women’s Conference — and honestly, I’m still reflecting on all God did in the hearts of women there.

There were moments of deep healing, freedom, laughter, tears, breakthrough, worship, and powerful encounters with the Father’s love.

So many women realized they had spent years striving, performing, carrying everything alone, and quietly living from exhaustion instead of resting in their identity as daughters of God.

In this livestream, I’ll be sharing: Highlights and testimonies from the conference The core themes from all four conference messages How the Seal of God and the Secret Place transform identity Why so many Christian women are living from striving instead of rest How intimacy with the Father changes perspective and heals orphan thinking The difference between living like an orphan and living as a daughter of the King

I’ll also be sharing photos and special moments from the weekend — including some beautiful mountain scenery, worship moments, breakthrough stories, and even a few unexpected adventures from camp activities. 

If you’ve ever: felt emotionally exhausted struggled with comparison or insecurity felt disconnected spiritually tied your worth to performance longed for deeper intimacy with God

…this conversation is for you.

Come join the conversation live, invite a friend, and let’s talk about what it truly means to live as daughters of the King. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

One of the messages is that there will be times that God calls us to step forward and use our voice. And when we're an orphan, we don't want to do that. First of all, we're going to have the lie going on in our head. What do you have to say? Somebody else could do that better. Who would want to hear from you? I had all of those thoughts going on in the inside of me when God called me to full-time ministry, especially when the Lord gave me a specific word about doing a live stream and a podcast. And I thought, what in the world am I going to say? What are people even going to want to hear? I don't do I even have anything that people will want to join or tune in for? And I had to realize that that was the orphan identity rising up. Because if my Heavenly Father has called me to step forward and use my voice, then He is going to provide everything I need. I will have to do it afraid for the first number of times. But every single time now, I'm building this history with God where I know that on the times I feel super prepared and the times when I feel like I just flew in on two wheels, God is still God. He still gives us what we need. It's not about my perfect performance. For more content, check out our ministry website at HigherPursuit Ministries.com. You can also find me on YouTube at Cecily LaChapelle with Higher Pursuit Ministries. Okay, now let's dive into the podcast. Hey everybody. Question for you. Have you ever loved God and still felt exhausted trying to hold everything together? Have you ever felt overlooked, emotionally alone? Have you been comparing yourself to everyone else, quietly wondering why you still don't feel secure enough, even though you know all the right Christian answers? Well, I think a lot of believers are living like spiritual orphans without even realizing it. And that's what we're going to talk about this tonight in this episode. And that's what I chatted about at the Menadnock Renew Women's Conference this past weekend, which we're going to chat about. But right now, I just want to welcome everybody to the Higher Pursuit live stream and podcast. Hello, Linda. Good to see you, girl. Good to see you. Um, so this is a podcast and live stream where we are doing life together. We are on a higher pursuit of more of the Lord. We are on an intimate pursuit of his presence and of the word. Kate O is in the house. All right. Hello, Kate. Good to see you. So this past weekend, I watched God begin healing the very thing I just opened with in women's hearts at the Menadnock Renew Women's Conference. And I've got to be completely vulnerable. I personally went into the weekend feeling completely stretched. Anybody who knows me knows I was asking for prayer because God had asked me to prepare and teach four messages in one weekend. Usually I might do one, maybe two, but four. This was this was a new high for me as far as the number of times speaking consecutively, plus the handouts, discussion guides, small group questions, declarations, PowerPoints, and a poem. The whole thing. But even more than the labor-intensive part of preparing the message, making sure that they flowed and brought people on a journey to revelation and transformation. I had the urgent prayer this weekend that it would not be a fly in and fly out event for me or for the women attending. I didn't want it to be a spiritual high, an emotional moment, or even a temporary reset. I wanted the weekend to be an identity shift. And that's what I really felt the Lord was saying to me. I really felt that the Lord was saying that he wanted the weekend to be an identity shift for the ladies, a revealing of their true identities as daughters of the king and a recommissioning into their assignment and their responsibility. All right. So Lisa Demurs is here and she has given the clapping emoji. So Lisa, I know that you were at the women's conference. So, ladies, I'm going to tell you right now, I am not having a menopausal hot flash. I am having a I have no AC in my room. Um, this office is hotter than Hades right now. This is the hottest place in the entire house. And so I literally, I feel like the wicked witch going, I'm melty. I feel like I'm gonna, I'm going to self-combust on camera in front of everybody. So I'm I'm sticking to my seat. I just cannot even express how hot it is. So this might be the shortest live stream I've ever done. And if it looks like I'm crying, I'm not crying. I'm literally melting. So um, yeah, should have put my hair up and all the things. Oh my goodness. So let's get back to this. Let's get back to discussion. Um, if any of you are melting in your house right now, we're having a heat wave here in New England. I don't know where you're watching from. I think most of the people that are on are here in New England, um, in my general area. Um, and we had 89 degree temperatures today, and my beloved husband was not prepared. Um, we didn't, we don't have, we have ACs that you have to load into the window. And so um, yep, it's it's quite hot. So enough of that. Moving on. Talking about the conference, there were moments leading up to the weekend when I I cried out to the Lord and I said, Lord, if you don't come through, this is going to be an epic fail. How many of you have ever carried something that was such a stretch for you that it forced you to say, Lord, um, I can't do this on my own. I literally, I could, I could probably pull out part of this, but for the results that I know you want to have come, I can't do this on my own. So give me a thumbs up in the chat if you've ever had that moment, that big stretch moment of saying, Lord, if you don't show up, it's gonna be ugly. Well, um while I wait for your thumbs up responses, spoiler alert, the Lord, of course, did come through. And what happened this weekend was incredibly powerful. Women encountered the love of the father, walls came down, tears flowed, lies were exposed, and women began stepping out of orphan thinking into daughter identity. So tonight I want to bring you into that journey with us. All right. Linda is Linda's got a thumbs up. John says he's been in that situation where if God doesn't show up, it's over. Lisa, yep, same thing. Well, I'm glad I wasn't the only one. And I know as believers, if we are legitimately doing what God's called us to do, Eva, two thumbs up. Guys, the sad but true news is that if we're really walking in our assignment, that level of stepping out into thin air, trusting that God is going to be the wind beneath our wings, that he's going to be the, like uh Psalm says, the everlasting arms underneath us, we're going to have those moments if we're in God's will. Because that's the only way that we know that we're stepping, we're walking in faith. And God is only pleased by faith. And we walk by faith and not by sight. So the comfort zone is walking by sight. When I know I've got it all lined up, I don't even need God for this. I got this. But that's not what we're called to. We're called as daughters of God, daughters of the king, which means we operate on a whole different operating system than the rest of the world. The rest of the world isn't going to step out. They're not going to do something unless they've read the manual and they feel comfortable. They know what's coming up ahead and that they can meet it. But as children of God, that isn't the way life is going to be for us. So it was anybody on this live stream at the conference this weekend. I know I can see Lisa Demurs. And I think Lisa, so far you're the only one that was at the conference with me that's on so far. But I do have now we have uh more people viewing. So if you are at the conference and you are hiding, lurking in the shadows, tell me if you were there. And uh, because I'd love to know if you're here, where you're watching from, and all of that. But if you were at the conference, tell me one thing that God spoke to you. And while you are typing, I'm going to move on and just give kind of a high-level recap of what we talked about for all the people that weren't there this weekend. So I structured the weekend like a journey, each message built on the one before that, because identity transformation doesn't happen all at once. So Friday night's message was called strong but striving. And the main point was that you can love God and still think and act and feel like an orphan. The key scripture was John 14, 18, which said, I will not leave you as orphans, I will come to you. That is Jesus saying that. So Jesus identified the fact that we were going to feel like orphans. He was talking to the 12 disciples, but their uh situations were not uh singular to them. He knew that we would read those words and we would need those words because we would feel like orphans. And so then I talked about the parable of the prodigal son, but I focused on the elder brother. And I used him as our parable example throughout the symptoms that I brought out for the orphan identity. And he was a perfect example because he fell into pretty much every single category of an orphan that I wanted to demonstrate. So the first symptom group for the orphan identity that I talked about was performance and striving, when we have to prove our worth. That's when our value becomes tied to what we accomplish. We feel most secure when we're producing, succeeding, helping, fixing, leading, achieving. It's when we feel like our worth has to be earned. And I just want a thumbs up from anybody who ever struggles with that. When you feel like your worth has to be earned, or you feel the most secure when you're producing, succeeding, helping, leading, achieving. I'm going to tell on myself because this is a a thousand percent my internal nature. My internal nature is not to rest, to to chill, to um just kind of sit leisurely. If you have a hard time sitting down watching a movie, I have to be busy. I have to be cleaning, organizing, doing something. It's very hard for me to just sort of sit still. And I received a prophetic word when it was right before I stepped out of my job into corporate, I'm out of corporate into full-time ministry. And part of the word was you're struggling to obey God because you are addicted to achievement. The prophet didn't use the word addicted, but that's what I heard. You you like being busy, you like the achievement, you like crossing things off your list, and you like being doing something you are good at and that you could do with half your brain tied behind your back. And that's exactly where I was at. And that was keeping me from taking the step of faith into ministry because of the comfort, the security, the predictability, the fact that I was good at it. I knew my bosses would praise me. I knew I was going to get a good bonus because I knew they would be happy with what I did. That, and I liked that feeling of being a benefit. And so that is part of that can be part of the orphan identity if we let it stop us. I spoke on Sunday about how because I had been working on my orphan identity and really becoming solid in my identity as a daughter of the king. When I heard that correction, I was able to instantly recognize it, go to my husband and say, I can't be, I can't be disobedient to my father. I mean, he is he was my heavenly father before you were my husband. We have to talk about this and we have to set a date. And I have a wonderful godly husband who said, I don't want you to be in disobedience either, because if I'm your covering, that means I'm in disobedience. So, yes, let's get after it. After it, let's fast, let's pray, let's set a date. Um, so the orphan identity can keep us from being who God called us to be. So then the second set of symptoms that I talked about was insecurity, comparison, and jealousy. This is a big one, ain't it? The orphan struggles to believe that there's enough love, favor, and purpose for them too. And comparison usually shows up in the places where our our identity is vulnerable. So if we're not careful, if we let comparison in and our identity is vulnerable in that place, jealousy begins to grow. And I told the ladies this weekend, jealousy is judgment on fire. Linda said yes, she's task focused. Yeah, I get that. I can be too. So jealousy is judgment on fire. And I used this example about that the feeling that there isn't enough. God is God doesn't have enough generosity, he does not have enough resource to bless my neighbor and bless me. And I think we all we've all struggled with that. We act like God has a limited supply of whatever that is that we think we need. And if brother so-and-so or sister so-and-so gets blessed in that area, we feel like, well, they just took one piece out of that pizza, and that means there's less for me. And what if there's eight slices in the pizza and I'm number 10 in line? By the time I get there, it will all be run out. Now, when I use that example, it sounds silly, right? We all feel like, well, God, of course, isn't limited in his supply of blessing, but that's how it feels to us in the moment. And the elder brother really perfectly exemplified that when he says to the father, when he's so furious about the celebration that's going on for the prodigal who just came home. He was like, You never even gave me a young goat to celebrate with my friends. But for this son of yours, you kill the fattened calf. So he's like, You what you didn't do this for me, as as if God was holding out on him that God was withholding. But the father turns to him and he says, You never asked. I've always been here. You could have had a relationship with me, and you could have had all the things you've always been here. Pretty sure you never asked. And that's what happens with us when we allow ourselves to become jealous. We have these blinders where we start actually accusing God of holding out on us that we know what we need, we know what we want, and he's blessing other people as if they got on some favor list and we're on the bad kid list. And then we get, then the anger turns toward God, not just towards the person, the jealousy towards the individual who has what we wanted. Now we are accusing God and it gets dangerous. So then the third symptom group that I brought up was self-protection, isolation, and anger. This is when we live guarded instead of resting in the fact that we're loved. And I shared with the ladies that how we respond to delayed or unanswered prayer will always expose what we believe about God. So when we have unhealed wounds, and then we start to self-protect and we start to isolate and we start to get angry. And I gave an example about a young lady that called me and she said that she wanted advice. She said that she wanted me to mentor her and to um she needed some some counsel on a situation. So I thought, okay, this is great. Absolutely. Well, what uh Lisa said, we've been having internet issues tonight, also Infinity or Xfinity. We actually just changed to something else that is different. I can't remember the name of it. I think it's like Fidium or something. So we'll see. We'll see how happens with that. Um, but so back to the story of this lady. So she called me, and what she really wanted to do was complain about her husband. And uh really complain. So I tried to redirect her, I tried to show her another perspective. I tried to actually even point out her orphan identity, which was glaring, and tried to suggest that maybe she might get some counseling or some marriage counseling. Well, her wall went right up because she was just looking to be validated. Have you ever talked to somebody like that? That they come to you saying, Oh, I really want your input. They didn't really want your input, they just wanted you to commiserate with them and to say, Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's terrible. So and so is terrible. They just wanted to gossip with you. They didn't really want a solution. Give me a thumbs up if you have had those kinds of conversations. So anyway, um, her wall rent went right up. And her parting shot to me was, you know what? I don't even need him. I don't even care. I've been on my own since I was 16. I make really good money. I don't even need him. And Colleen was like, yes, thumbs up, Kate, yes, John, yes, yes. We have had those conversations with people that they're not looking for a solution. And this woman was not. And it was so scary and sad because they have children together. And she said, you know what, our kids will just shuttle between houses because I can't do this anymore. I'm tired of carrying everything, everything's always on me, and I'm just I'm just tired of it. And I can do this on my own. And I asked the ladies at the conference, I said, Do you think she's really thought that through? Do you think being a single mother is really going to be easier than working through your issues in your marriage? But what happened? She allowed herself to become completely overwhelmed because of her codependency, which I tried to point out, but she didn't want to hear it. Uh, she allowed herself to get so weary that now the slightest thing is a huge assault. The slightest thing that he does is now a ginormous issue. And so she is just beyond. She has allowed herself to get to this place where she's now isolating, she's putting up walls, she's criticizing and negative about everything, she's judging everything. And I brought up to the ladies what an orphan doesn't do that. I mean, an orphan does that, a daughter of the king doesn't do that. A daughter of the king goes to her father with her issues before they crush her. Because a daughter seeks intimacy. First. It's all about our relationship. And with this young woman, she has not fostered a relationship of intimacy with the Holy Spirit. She's overloaded. She's got a ton on her plate. I'll give her that. She has a lot on her plate. But when your life is too overloaded for you to have fellowship with your father, you're too overloaded. You have to dial it back and you've got to ask yourself some tough questions because it is not acceptable for a child of God to not have fellowship with the Holy Spirit. That is not what Jesus died for. He died so that the door would be open. He died so that that veil would be torn from the top to the bottom, so that we would have free access to his presence. And when we refuse to go and we allow ourselves to become weary, exhausted, isolated, angry, martyrs, then we have done that to ourselves. And it is an affront to God. Because then, oh, Jessica Barnes from the retreat. Yay! Oh, she got the babies down. And yes, she's yes. And Jessica said, I'm around people who like to commiserate all the time. Oh, Jessica, I'm so glad that you joined us. That is so awesome. So awesome. So awesome. Well, guys, I just have to ask you, have you ever felt exhausted trying to hold everything together? I'm sure Jessica, as a mom of young ones, what did you say? They are three and four years old. Um, yep, she definitely knows what that's like to have to hold everything together. But talk to me, people. Which orphan tendency do you relate to the most? The striving, the comparison, the fear, proving yourself, emotional independence, like that young lady that I talked about, that's difficulty receiving love. Which of those do you relate to the most? Or which are the ones you have to fight the most often that want to just creep back? For me, I'm gonna say it's proving myself, proving myself to myself and feeling oddly like I'm proving myself to God, but also proving myself to other people. So I think that's where the orphan identity tries to slip back in with me. Colleen says fear. Yep. I hear you, girl. Fear is a fear is a big one. And that, I mean, if we think about the root of fear, Lisa says, me too. Um, I'm not sure what you're me tooing, Lisa. Me too to all Colleen or Me Too to what I said. And Jessica said, all of the above, I have to fight to not put up a wall to protect myself and my feelings. Yep, I hear that. Well, I, you know, for me, I I think I try to, my, my proving myself to myself, to other people, it has caused me at times to feel like I'm alone. As if I the weight of my life is on my shoulders. And when you live in fear, Colleen, that is a similar mindset where we feel like we're alone. And that's why it's part of the orphan identity, because we're acting like we don't have a heavenly father who is in our future. He's not just in our present, but that he has gone before us, that his favor goes before us like a shield. Our heart is not jiving with what our mind is comprehending from the word. And that's where intimacy with the Holy Spirit is the critical piece. And I don't want to get ahead of myself because I talk about that in one of my messages. Kate said, insecurity. Lisa said, proving myself and self-protection. Yep, I hear you. Good answers, guys. Well, um, and then Colleen said, I agree, Jessica. I used to have what I thought were the best walls. Oh my gosh. Yeah, Colleen, um, you actually would really love Jessica. I wish you guys could have met. Um, you two, you two are remind me so much of each other, just so so down to earth and real and approachable, easy to, easy to love ladies. But so during the conference, I told a story about my dad and how my dad married a much younger woman after my parents' divorce. And I went from being a priority in his life to being part of his past. And as I was interacting with women during the course of the weekend and sitting in a small group, I heard them talking about how issues with their fathers really impacted how much they trusted the heart of the father for them. Give me a thumbs up if that is your case at all. If you can tell that some of this goes back to your dad. I'm not saying everything is daddy issues because we have plenty of orphan Christians walking around who came from very functional families who had wonderful, loving fathers. But somewhere along the line, Jessica, ouch, spot on. Somewhere along the line, we started believing Lies of the Orphan, whether we had a great dad or not. But for me, a lot of it started spiraling from that place. And Friday night's message really hit home with a lot of ladies as far as pulling the blinders off that not only were they not trusting the heart of the father for them, but where and how they weren't trusting the heart of the father. And then also what the impact of that disconnection from the father can do. I sat in on Jessica's small group, and one lady commented that she'd always been striving for approval and she wasn't sure how to not do that anymore. And what was so cool is to hear all the ladies chime in just to encourage her, to give her things that tools that had worked for them. And that is the beauty of community. That's really what I'm trying to create here is the beauty of community where it's not just me talking to you and you talking to me, but you talking with one another, helping one another out. But when we're an orphan, we can't be vulnerable because we are afraid that if we show our weakness, we'll get rejected. Again, somebody wounded us and we feel like that's gonna happen again. So we it's hard to be vulnerable. It's easier to live in isolation when we have an orphan identity. So part of coming out of the orphan identity is forcing ourselves to do the opposite. Oh, Colleen, Jessica's gonna know exactly who you are now because I talked about you in this message on The Daughter's Heart, Living from Belonging. I talked about you, girl, how you stepped forward to do the Easter play when you didn't want to do the Easter play. Remember, I warned you you were gonna be in my message and you were. And so, so that's that's Colleen, you guys. That was the the woman, my friend, who did it afraid and she trusted God to get her through, and he did. And now she knows she can really trust the scripture that says that she can do all things through Christ, who lives on the inside of her and gives her strength, and that she she truly is a daughter, that God helped her cross that line. And that when the Lord says step forward and use your voice, she can do that now. Obviously, probably still a little afraid, but um oh yeah, and Linda Nardella said it's like having walls up, fearing attachments. Yes, ma'am, you hit the nail on the head, exactly. And Colleen said, Absolutely. Yes, you know what? Speaking about stepping forward, because that was one of the things that I talked about in one of the messages, one of the messages is that there will be times that God calls us to step forward and use our voice. And when we're an orphan, we don't want to do that. First of all, we're going to have the lie going on in our head. What do you have to say? Somebody else could do that better. Who would want to hear from you? I had all of those thoughts going on in the inside of me when God called me to full-time ministry, especially when the Lord gave me a specific word about doing a live stream and a podcast. And I thought, what in the world am I going to say? What are people even going to want to hear? I don't do I even have anything that people will want to join or tune in for? And I had to realize that that was the orphan identity rising up. Because if my heavenly father has called me to step forward and use my voice, then he is going to provide everything I need. I will have to do it afraid for the first number of times, but he will give me what I need. And so, yeah, the first couple of times I did a live stream, it was a little freaky. I'm thinking, well, I don't know if the technology is going to work. How's this all going to go? And then every single time after that, it has gotten easier. And every single time now, I'm building this history with God where I know that on the times I feel super prepared and the times when I feel like I just flew in on two wheels, God is still God. He still gives us what we need. It's not about my perfect performance. So in um message number three, I talked about the Roman adoption. And I won't go into all of that, but one fun fact about the Roman adoption, and the reason I brought that all up is because we have been adopted as children into the family of God. So we're not orphans. We are now adopted children. But for many of us, thinking about our adoption system, it's easy to feel like adoption is like the redheaded stepchild. That if you were born into the family, you're more loved. But if you're adopted, you're like, well, you were out there, you're needy, nobody else wanted you. So I figure, well, all right, I'll just I'll take you in. But with Roman adoption, it wasn't like that at all. The child, teenager, or even an adult was chosen by the patriarch of the family, and their adoption was sealed because the patriarch of the family wanted that specific person to be in his lineage, to have his name, to receive his inheritance. And I also told the ladies, six of the Caesars were adopted so that they could be a part of that Caesar line and be the next in line for the crown. But the really fun fact about Roman adoption is that it was better to be an adopted child in a Roman family than a natural-born child, because natural-born sons and daughters could themselves be sold off into adoption. I kid you not. I joked with the ladies, I'm like, you will come in on curfew if you know that your dad could sell you off into adoption to some other family and you have no control. You'd be like, yes, sir, I will be right there. But adopted children could legally never be removed from the family. And it is that time period when all of that was happening in that culture, first century culture. That's when Paul is writing. And that's when he drops that explosive scripture that you have been adopted through the Spirit as sons and daughters. So our adoption is irrevocable. And it has nothing to do with our worth. It had nothing to do with us being poor, lonely, weak, needy, loser, any of that. It had to do with the fact that the father looked and said, I want that one. I want her. I want him. So then we also talked about the seal. That was the like a not a seal like, you know, or that kind of seal, but I can't believe I just did that. But a seal as in a signet ring seal. And the seal imagery I brought through the whole four messages. And I brought out how in Esther there were three decrees that were sealed, and how each one was irrevocable. Whether the king wanted, whether he regretted having signed that decree, even he, as the one who signed it, couldn't undo the decree he made. Because if it was sealed with the signet ring, it had the backing and the authority of the throne that went beyond even the personality of the king. And Ephesians 1:3 says, and you also were included in Christ when you heard the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation. When you believe you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit. And it will never be undone. And then I talked about how in the story of the prodigal son, when the father runs to the sun, what does he do? What does he put on the sun? Tell me in the chat if you remember. There's two things that he puts on the sun immediately. I'm gonna wait a second and sip some of my ice cold coffee to try to bring my body temperature down while you type. Colleen got it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The ring and the cloak. Mm-hmm. So it wasn't just any old ring. The father wasn't just doing something emotional, saying, you know, you're you're in raggedy clothes. You're you you look you smell like a pig. Literally. I have to put a new robe on you before we bring you into the house because you stink. No. The robe and the ring, the cloak and the ring, the cloak was for identity. Do you remember the story of Joseph and his cloak of many colors? That that robe of many colors, that was uh identity as a son, as a favored son. And so the father puts the prodigal son's cloak back on him, and then he puts the family signet ring on his finger. And that signet ring meant that the son had full legal authority in that family for buying, selling, anything that would be sealed legally with a signet ring into wax. The son had his right standing back. Now think about it. This is a kid who just squandered his entire inheritance. His life is a mess. He's a train wreck. The only thing he's done right is come back and repent. But he's improving himself, he hasn't made any wise choices. But the father doesn't put him on probation, he immediately restores his identity and says, You have full authority now. That's the story that Jesus uses to show us what happens with us. God, the moment we become a child of God and we are adopted into the family of God, irrevocably adopted, the robe of righteousness goes on us, and the signet ring of authority goes on our finger. And yes, we are not on probation, Colleen. It's so that is scandalous grace. It's absolutely scandalous grace. None of us deserve that. But God gives us what we have not earned and what we haven't deserved. He also knows we're gonna grow into it. There will be, yep, there's gonna be correction, there will be pruning. There, he's he's not throw he's not giving us the full authority and walking away. He is giving us full authority while he lives in us and works with us. But he is taking a big risk, giving us that level of authority while we are immature and growing. It's amazing. He's he's amazing. And then we talked about in that message what feels true and what is true are not always the same thing. And the key line from that message was I don't strive for belonging, I live from it. So what role have you tied your identity to? Have you tied your identity to a role? Like, for instance, for many years, I tied my identity to my role as a mom. When my kids were young, if they misbehaved, I felt like it reflected back on me. So my identity was tied to the success or failure of my children. So when I had a son who started acting badly and I'm getting called into school, and when I had when that son gets older and is now getting arrested, I felt like I was a bad mother. I failed. I didn't look at it as his choice. My identity was wrapped right up into him. If my kids had successes, I was having a good day. If my kids had bad had failures, I was not having a good day. And it took a lot of work for the Lord to show me that my identity is not the same as my role. For instance, also when I worked in a corporate job, if I made a mistake, let's just say I made a mistake that cost the company $10,000. That's a very bad day. It didn't happen, by the way, but that's a very bad day. But does that mean that I'm a horrible executive assistant because I made a mistake? No. So when our identity is locked into a role, then it's trouble. So have you ever locked your identity into a role? Whether it was parenting or a career or something that you feel called to, tell me in the chat if you've ever tied your identity to something other than your identity as a child of God. Maybe you're not in that anymore. Maybe you have your identity is free of that. I mean, we see it, for instance, with moms when they become empty nesters. They can say, Well, who am I now? I've raised kids for like the last 30 years. Colleen says, absolutely understand this. I was like this completely. Identity as a mom, beating myself up when they stumbled because it had to be my parenting. Yeah, I mean, we hear people say this all the time. Good kids, good parents. Bad kids, bad parents. Now, I'm not saying that there isn't some truth. And we can't, we we can't give up completely and say, it doesn't matter what I do with my children, um, however they turn out, I'll I'm fine. I mean, obviously we have responsibility, but that's not usually the case with someone like Colleen or me. We did the best we could, but our our children still made their choices. It's the same thing with God. I'm pretty sure God was an excellent parent, but explain Adam and Eve. When we do the best we can, that's the best we could do. Public elementary school teacher felt adrift when I left. Kate, yes. Yeah. Oh, and Jessica, I feel this way now when my kids become dysregulated. It's hard. Separating our identity from kids or career is can be very, very tough. You also see it with older people when they can't physically do what they used to do before. Maybe they were super involved in church or um activities or volunteering. And now they're more homebound, or their health issues keep them from participating. And they start wondering do I matter anymore? Do I even have purpose? Do I even should I even Still be here, and that's hard. That's when you know your identity got locked into what you do rather than who you are as a child of God. Now, here's another question I have for you guys. Have you ever struggled to believe that God actually delights in you? I read something, I'm reading a book by C.S. Lewis. It's a tough read, it's a tough sled, I'm not gonna lie. For some reason, I love C.S. Lewis's writing, but this one essay that he wrote called The Weight of Glory, let me know if you have ever read it. Um yes. Um yeah, so Colleen says she has struggled to believe that God delights in her. The reason I put that question in is because in the weight of glory, C.S. Lewis poses this. He said, Many of us feel very guilty when we allow our mind to float into the concept. This is not how we put it at all. I'm butchering it, but I'm just trying to get the thought out. To float into the concept that God delights in us. We feel that that's very sacrilegious, it doesn't feel right, it doesn't feel like it makes sense. How could he? Blah, blah, blah. But he said it is innate in children to want to please their parents or to want to please their teachers. It's innate in a spouse that truly loves their spouse to want to please their spouse. And then when they receive that delight, when the child receives the delight of the dad or of the mother, they feel wonderful. And when a spouse does something out of love for their spouse and they receive that delight back, they feel wonderful. And C.S. Lewis said God put that in us, not so that we could get it from other places, but He put that in us as an innate longing so that we could go to Him and say, I want to feel your delight. The problem is when you're an orphan, you won't let yourself even feel it. But when you are a daughter or a son going to your Heavenly Father and asking, I want to feel your delight. You will feel it. So let me, I'm just gonna give you this final example and then we're just gonna wrap this up. There was so much more that I wanted to share, but I'm not gonna have time. Um, but I have started over the past, I don't know, I don't know, number of years. Maybe let's just I'll just pick three. I'll pick three years, between three and five years. Every time I minister, I sit there, I stand there before I'm gonna go up, usually during the last song of praise and worship or something like that, and I ask that question. And this is before I ever read this by C.S. Lewis. So this is why it intrigued me. Um, and I always say, Jesus, where are you right now? Because I don't want to go up on that platform alone. I only want to go if I know you're with me. And invariably I see Jesus and he's standing right in front of me. And he will always do something. He will either kiss me on the forehead, or he'll take my hands and squeeze my hands and look in my face. He will do something, or he'll put his hand on my shoulder or on my chest, or he will cut my face in his hands. He will do something to say, I'm here, you're not going there alone. You don't speak of your own accord. I'm with you. And I feel the delight of the Lord. It's like, let's go, let's go. And people ask me, when you're speaking, do you feel nervous until then? Maybe up until that moment. But the moment that I turn my eyes to Jesus and I say, Where are you? And can I feel your delight? Then it's all, it's all over. I'm not, I'm not nervous at all because I'm not going alone. And that's how I have conquered the orphan identity. Does it still want to slip in? Of course it does. And then I go back to my father again and again and again. The orphan identity wants us to think we are alone. We are not delightful to the Lord. He's disappointed. We're one mistake away from him being like last nerf, I am done. But it's the opposite. He is begging us to let him show us his delight. Because his delight is infinite. You are so delightful to your father. So delightful. And that's that's really where I want to kind of end this live stream tonight. So next week, by popular request, in Jesus' name, I'm going to start sharing some Bible study techniques for those of you who want to go deeper in your Bible study. So pray for me because I have only taught this live. So there are some technical things I need to figure out between now and then how I will do what I did live in a classroom. Oh, Linda said I received that. That's awesome. And Jessica said incredible. Awesome. Delisa, yay, good to see you, girl. I'm so glad you're here. Yay, Delisa's here. Awesome. Silk is in the house. Okay, but I'm going to teach from the book of Matthew because it is, in my opinion, the most challenging of the gospels for Gentile believers to understand. Because Matthew is writing to a Jewish audience. And because of that, we are going to have to use all the tools. We're going to have to break out our commentaries, our dictionaries, our atlases, our resources to figure out what Matthew's Jewish audience would have innately known. And Matthew doesn't explain it. So we're going to have to go dig for all that good stuff. And we're going to start that next week. I'm kind of excited and I'm kind of nervous. So I don't have all the answers as a teacher of how to study the Bible, but such as I have, I will give unto you. And we'll talk about how to research scripture in the original languages in a way that's easy to do and understand. We'll talk about the first things you need to know and do before you study a passage or a book of the Bible. And I'm going to show you my favorite Bible study tool. There's tons out there, but I've got one that I'm super familiar with. So because I know my way around it, it's just easy for me to explain that one. Sound good? Okay. I'm just believing you are all nodding. Yes, Cecily, that sounds great. And before I pray you out, I want to remind you that if any of this content blessed you, please share it. Delisa Silk, so excited. Yay, Linda, can't wait. Oh, yay. That's great. That is so encouraging. Well, this is this seriously, sharing this live stream is the best way you can minister to your friends and also help my content reach more people. Because obviously, as you know, you all have your individual circles of people. And she told two friends, and she told two friends, and she told two friends. And if you're not subscribed to my YouTube channel or to this podcast on whatever podcast platform you are listening to it, make sure to do that. And thirdly, make sure to get on my mailing list so you can be updated with the link to every week's live stream and find out where and when I'm speaking and all the things that go on in the higher pursuit ministries. And lastly, if you're feeling extra generous, please go to your podcast platform and rate this podcast, whether it's on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, um, YouTube podcasts, those ratings are gold in the podcast world. Like you could write me a check for a million dollars, or you could go rate the podcast and it'll take two minutes because the platforms pay a lot of attention to the ratings. And the two minutes of your time pay serious dividends to God's message through this ministry. So thank you in advance for your ratings. Okay. And also, let me just click on this little banner for you guys. This is your take-home for this week. Sit with the Lord and ask him, Father, where am I still living, acting, or feeling like an orphan? And what is the lie behind that belief? And what is the truth? Okay, guys, we are going to pray. Heavenly Father, we come to you as your sons and daughters. Lord, we don't have all the answers, but we know the one who does. We know that in our life there will be times that you are calling us out upon the water. You're calling us to step into the unknown. You're calling us to stretch and do the thing that seems impossible. And if you don't show up, it is impossible. There are times when you are calling us to deny every feeling and emotion on the inside of us and trust that you really do delight in us. Lord, if we didn't have Jesus, then we could feel that you are disconnected with the plight of humankind. But Jesus came and he lived as a man. He knows exactly how we feel. He knows exactly what it feels like to be us, limited in time and space. And yet he never sinned. And as a result, he is now our perfect risen savior and intercessor. So we thank you, Jesus, that you are our support, you are our guide, and we ask you, Holy Spirit, to continue to unveil in our heart our identity as sons and daughters of God, adopted into your family, sealed with the Holy Spirit, not temporarily, not conditionally, not probationally, but irrevocably sealed into the family of God. And that you delight in us. Oh, we want to feel your delight. We want to see your delight. We want to know your delight. So we thank you that you're unpacking that and unveiling that to us in Jesus' name. We thank you, Lord, for your goodness. Amen. Amen. All right, guys. I love you. Thank you so much for being with me tonight, and I will see you next week. Bring your Bibles. If you want to read ahead into the book of Matthew, you can come with your SmartyPants answers already in your back pocket. Okay, love you. Talk to you soon. Bye. Hey family, I pray that you were blessed and encouraged by that episode, and that you took away something you can use in your walk with the Lord starting today. Jesus tells us in Matthew 6 to seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness. So I thank you for making me a part of your pursuit. Until next time, abide in Him.