Settling Children into Nursery and School.

Are you ready for a fresh perspective on early years education? We guarantee that this eye-opening conversation with Sarah, Kealey and  Steph filled with personal stories and insights, will change the way you view the significance of early childhood teaching. We kick things off by debunking common misconceptions about early years education and examining the unique challenges that come with settling young children into school.

Then, we delve into the psychology of attachment, revealing the secret to forging a secure bond between children and their caregivers. We share practical tips and resources, like the red books and the Invisible String book, by Patrice Karst, that can ease the transition into a different year group. 
We conclude by expressing our enthusiasm for the upcoming school term, emphasizing the significance of routines and building relationships with children and families.

References
Book: The invisible string by Patrice Karst
App: Balance

We have not be paid or benefit in any way by promoting the book or app. 

Transcript

Speaker 1 0:10

Hello and welcome to the earlier staff meeting podcast with Sarah Keelian Steff, a place where you can listen, learn and laugh with us about all things early years.

Speaker 2 0:21

Hello, hi girls, hello everyone.

Speaker 3 0:22

Hello everyone.

Speaker 2 0:24

We're back. We've done the first vlog at school. We're back. We're in the cupboard.

Speaker 3 0:32

We're in the cupboard.

Speaker 1 0:35

AKA the recording studio.

Speaker 3 0:37

Yes, we've got a sign on the door that says please do not enter.

Speaker 2 0:40

Yep, so that's how people respect the signage. So if we have any interruptions, apologies, we'll just have to roll with it.

Speaker 3 0:48

I'm going to have to flop the camera. Everyone coming in to get some pom poms.

Speaker 1 0:54

So today in our podcast, we're going to be starting with a little professional event and then we're going to be going on to our main agenda, which is talking about ways that we settle the children in, which is very appropriate for this time of year, and then we're going to do some staff voice on how we are settling in this year and then finish with our mindful moment.

Speaker 2 1:16

Okay, so let's crack on with the professional event Down to the wrong one again. That was the best one. Let's go. Let's just go with the hang of it. I need to take that one off for a while.

Speaker 1 1:34

Professional event how do you do that one? It sets the wrong tone. It puts me in too much of a good mood, okay, so, yeah. So I wanted to have a little professional event this week because where I have moved into nursery, where I've been teaching in sort of reception and key stage one for a few years, yeah, I've had some people, people that are not in education, people sort of outside of education, but also people that you know, work in schools that I know but don't work in necessarily the early years, sort of almost look down on it as like a little demotion.

Speaker 1 2:15

They sort of can't understand why I've been put into nursery like, or moved down into nursery like it's something that's been done for me and I just think it, I'm kind of having to justify, you know, like, oh you, you put it's questions like are you, are you properly? You're not properly teaching then, and I just think that kind of sums up people's perception of, like early years education. It's like actually, you know, if I was an ECT or an inexperienced person going into nursery, like it would be so much harder to say. You've kind of got to use all your years of experience and knowledge of children and how children develop, to sort of support you, especially in this early bit. Yes, I just wanted to have a bit of a rant about it really, because it just gets on my nerves when people think that.

Speaker 2 3:02

That's awful and I just I feel really sad to hear that other professionals would feel that you've been demoted or that you're not. You're not a proper teacher and you're not doing any teaching and it just shows their lack of complete understanding, even in child development, that they wouldn't understand that in early years that we are teaching. That's why it's called the foundation stage, because we are teaching them the foundations for them. But when they finally reach those teachers you know classes that they all of those skills that they needed to be able to get to them into year three or year four or year six or whatever. It's all because of their first time in school.

Speaker 1 3:48

So and I think that because there's not so much of a delivery of lessons as such in nursery that people don't see it as proper teaching and they don't understand actually the important bits you're doing, which are the prime areas. And it's so essential because if the children are not happy and settled which we'll be talking about in a minute they can't do any learning.

Speaker 3 4:14

And that is such a big thing. If you don't do those bits first and have them settled and have them ready to learn, they're not going to be able to do that when they get into reception, which means they're not going to be able to learn how to read and write, which means when they get into year one. That's when we then start to see behaviour, because they're not ready and they're not prepared and they haven't got the foundation bit sorted so that they're not ready for the big part of learning. So if you don't get it right here, then you're done for.

Speaker 2 4:46

So if you're listening and you work in any year group, even if you're a reception teacher, please don't look down on other people.

Speaker 3 4:54

No.

Speaker 2 4:55

Please, just you know, have utter respect for any colleague, wherever they're working, because we're all doing an amazing job, absolutely, and it's a really tough job.

Speaker 1 5:04

So you know, we don't need to be putting people down and I also say go and have a look. If you know you have got an earlier setting in a primary school or whatever. Go and spin, go and pop down and visit the nursery, Absolutely, and actually see what we're dealing with.

Speaker 2 5:19

Then you might have a little bit.

Speaker 1 5:20

More respectful, exactly.

Speaker 2 5:22

They'll be pleased with the extra head for five minutes. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 3 5:26

I'll have this crying child One extra little cuddle or a little. You're okay and sit down and play. Yeah, I think it's really important Because, as I've now moved up the school, it's really interesting to see that lots of people don't understand where children are getting frustrated because they can't see. Oh, why can't they do that? Why aren't they being able to do this, this and this? Because they can't see where they've come from.

Speaker 3 5:52

And actually if you go down to early years and go and see where they've come from, it's really interesting and I think just a day will let you go oh yeah, now I can see. And it will just help you just to understand where those children are coming from, especially those children who are not meeting where they maybe should be at that time, and to go and have a look and especially those social and emotional children. Those children there are really struggling social and emotionally. They go and have a look and see what's going on down in early years, because that will give you loads of ideas to help those children, because actually they might need to pull it right back to that earlier stage.

Speaker 2 6:30

Yeah, just early, and I think there's that fear of teachers that they don't want to do that because they just don't understand.

Speaker 3 6:36

You're not going backwards, you're going backwards to go forwards. If you keep going, pushing forwards, you're just going to end up, even worse than what you are.

Speaker 1 6:45

Oh, thank you, ladies. I feel vented now.

Speaker 3 6:50

We support you. We do Every step of the way.

Speaker 1 6:54

I know you will support me Right.

Speaker 2 6:58

OK, are we ready? That's the right one.

Speaker 1 7:01

OK, so we're moving on to our main agenda today, which is talking about how we can settle children into school, because obviously that's quite topical at the moment, where we've just come back to school and we're doing lots of work on settling children in. So what do we think is key?

Speaker 2 7:23

So I think you probably still may have one or two children at the moment, that might still be really struggling In that instant. That first week, the first day always goes really well and you think, oh, this is good, we've all settled in, we've all come in fine. Then day two hits, yeah, and it just knocks you off your feet. Realization. And every year it just lulls you into this school sense. Even though I know what's going to happen, I still think, oh no, the first day you always go oh, that went really well, I'm so pleased.

Speaker 3 7:58

You walk into the next day and the end of the next day doesn't sound quite as triple as the first.

Speaker 2 8:06

The drama line hits and we have tears, parents tears, yeah, because I think they did the same as us that oh, they're in, yeah, it's all going to be OK. Yeah, but what the children have done, they've just thought, actually, this is going to happen every day. And it's suddenly that realization that, ok, actually, I'm not going to be OK and I am going to get very upset. And in nursery at the moment we have still got children that are getting upset.

Speaker 1 8:32

Every day and it is very momentarily, it's sort of as they come in they'll cry on the separation from their parents and then, literally within three or four minutes, they've come into nursery and they're settled and it's all good. But yeah, it is hard. I think it takes that little bit longer when they're younger and when it's perhaps their first time separating from their parents as well, or carers. So some children haven't been to a setting yet Quite high percentage in nursery. So yeah, we've had quite a lot of tears, and that's just me.

Speaker 3 9:12

But yours is so important in nursery because they've got that.

Speaker 3 9:15

It's attachment and making sure those attachments are not broken and not put to the point that the children are then distressed because that can cause more problems in time, and just just that.

Speaker 3 9:28

The attachment is that mommy will be back or daddy will be back. Those people will all coming back, come and have the fun and then you get to go back after and then to make more relationships here. Which is the biggest thing and it's a big thing they're talking about at the school at the moment is how important relationships are, because that is the biggest thing and even working with some of the oldest children, how that is so important and how settling in. Actually some of them are almost reverting back to how they were at nursery because they're finding it really hard and some of them are almost grieving and it really was the other day the child just couldn't stop crying because they were grieving for the year three and that's how it felt to them is that it was gone and it was dead and they didn't know what to do, but actually putting things in for them to go down and have a look at where they were from, to make sure that attachment isn't gone, it's processing change, isn't it basically?

Speaker 2 10:27

It's processing change and routine attach like being removed from their, their primary care and in nursery that is, it will be their first setting when they've ever done that. So it is grieving, it is a grief, so it's being mindful that actually it is okay for children to be upset. It's okay to allow them that time to cry, to get their bodies to release that emotion, that anxiety that they have, and actually you do always feel better after you've had a good cry.

Speaker 2 10:57

I mean, I know I do, and that's why it is, and that is why they do that is to get that that anxiety out. So allow them that time to have a cry and you know, as long as they're safe and you're sitting with them and just being calm, then that's that allows them to know that you're that steady, strong person that you.

Speaker 3 11:17

Yeah, and that's also part of building that relationship. It's trusting that that person. You are going to stay there with them until they're ready, and that's the first part of your relationship which is so important.

Speaker 1 11:29

Yeah, and for some children it's really easy. They just find that easy and they are settled as soon as they come in, and maybe that's because they've sort of gone through that attachment phase previously, or they just have a different attachment style to their parents. And then for others it is more tricky, and I think it's especially tricky on those parents where it is their first setting and they feel emotional they're struggling with it. We all know how it feels we're all mums that work and having to drop your children off for something else.

Speaker 3 12:08

It does tear at your heart, you kind of empathise with the parents so much so.

Speaker 1 12:13

Just little things, like if it's a child that's really upset, I'll just try and give them a call in the morning, just to let them know, oh, they're okay. And I think if you can release some of that tension with the parents it rubs off positively on the children as well.

Speaker 2 12:27

And it's that first, you are their first. So, Steph, you are the first like face of the school that they know. So once you've built up that trust of them, that will carry on through the rest of the school. So it's so vital that you keep in contact with parents and, even if their child is still crying, whilst you're on the phone to the parent, just reassuring them that you are doing everything that you can to make that child feel safe and as secure as possible.

Speaker 3 12:56

That just makes people feel relieved, basically and talking to that parent, asking them what, what helps that child, because they're the parent, they know their child the best. So you just ask them what what maybe helps maybe a soft toy, or they really like cars, or whatever is actually things that you can help to help that child feel secure and safe. And asking the parent is the best way to go, because they know their child the best.

Speaker 1 13:27

And we have in our setting. We use what we call red books, but they're like journals, they're scrapbooks with photographs of children's family and they've become really important to the children setting in. They absolutely love sharing them and some children. For them it's like a comfort, so they'll actually carry it around with them. It's like they're carrying their family.

Speaker 2 13:49

So we're with them and it's kind of allowing them to do that, I know, but it's keeping their families in mind and that's what is helping to keep their attachments secure yeah, they are, so they get very dogged by the end of the year don't they, they're well loved.

Speaker 1 14:08

Some of the nursery ones are already doing it.

Speaker 2 14:10

They're telling you but yeah they are. They're very precious. Another thing I've had a child who has continued to be very upset in the mornings and actually what's really helped him is we read the book the Invisible String and.

Speaker 2 14:26

I will put the link in this podcast, because it is an amazing book and it basically, to sum it up, it's about teaching children that, no matter where they are, and even in the world, even if someone's passed away, that attachment, that string that they is connected between them and the person that they're attached to never breaks. It stretches to wherever they are, and if you tug on it though, if you get them to pretend to tug on it that the other person will feel it, and you can also carry that on. So if you needed something more concrete, they could have a transitional object, so we've asked parents to find two objects that are the same, maybe a pebble, or one of those little kinder egg toys or something that is very small, that can be kept in their pocket.

Speaker 2 15:14

They can just touch that and the child thinks that their mum or their caregiver has felt that touch.

Speaker 1 15:25

Another thing I've seen is like a love button. You can hold it or they draw a little heart on their hands and the parent draws a heart and then you can touch it.

Speaker 2 15:34

And for young children. They need a concrete thing, which is why sometimes they have their special teddy. It's their transitional object that they need to have that physical touch. So, yeah, I could highly recommend that book. I get it out every year. It's a trusted friend.

Speaker 3 15:49

But that's again still very much about grieving, isn't it?

Speaker 2 15:52

Yeah, it is yeah, and also just having a timetable, a visual timetable, getting them out, so that children know what's coming next. They don't know what the routine is, and that is what they're unsure of they don't know what's coming next.

Speaker 1 16:09

And they just need to know that eventually it's going to be home time, whether that's going to after school go to some children, whether it's being picked up by a child mind or whether it's carer. They just need to know that we're going to go through this process. It's going to be the same every day. It's a regular routine and that, yeah, it will end with mom, dad, parent, carer, whoever coming to pick me up, and it's just that process, isn't it, of learning that?

Speaker 2 16:36

And I think routines are incredibly important to children and to adults because we all like to know what's coming next. So I think should we do the next one about routines.

Speaker 1 16:47

Yeah.

Speaker 2 16:47

establishing routines yeah, I think that's really important, so we'll go into routines more detail in the next one. I think we've already promised that. Actually I think we have, but we will do it.

Speaker 1 16:56

We didn't deliver so if anybody's a regular, that's an interview, single one, that's just me. So yeah, that will be. That's probably a good place to go next.

Speaker 2 17:11

I'll meet him. Yeah, okay, are we ready? Yep.

Speaker 1 17:20

So it's time for some star voice. And how? How are we settling in this year?

Speaker 3 17:27

Oh yeah, go and set face at me.

Speaker 1 17:32

You probably had the biggest change going into a new year group in a completely different structure really to the rest of the school, in a way. Being in nursery, I work with some fantastic people so I've got a great team of support staff who have been in nursery for many years. They're very established so they're helping me out with all the things I haven't learnt yet.

Speaker 2 17:59

And they're very skilled as well. They are extremely.

Speaker 1 18:02

They're very just good at what they do. So it's been lovely in that way settling in. I'm just getting used to building those relationships, really with the children but also with the parents, because, as you said earlier, I'm kind of the first port of call for some of these parents and carers at the school and because I'm a newer face to that year group where we had somebody that was quite established in the school that had been there for many, many years. Although I have been teaching for a long time, you know, you've kind of got to build up that reputation of being somebody that is OK.

Speaker 1 18:43

They can't trust, and so I think that takes time as well. So it's just really important but just trying to squeeze in, making those phone calls, catching up with parents that I maybe haven't spoken to yet. You know, I've got a few children that go to wrap around so we don't see mum or dad or whoever, and they sort of called in just to check how they're going, and it's just yeah, just building those relationships really, and I'm just getting my head around it.

Speaker 2 19:09

And how many children do you have? Well, I feel like the old women that lived in a shoe so many children just didn't know what to do.

Speaker 1 19:19

So we have up to 45 in a session, but we do have sort of 62 on roll, so it's kind of like double a class. Two classes, two sets of parents to remember, two sets of like different hiccups and it's different children on different days.

Speaker 3 19:35

So nobody does like a set.

Speaker 1 19:38

A set it sort of pick your own sessions, really so some children do like all morning. Some children do you know, the random Wednesday it's just very, very random, so it's kind of just getting used to that. So I'm getting there. I'm not fully settled in yet. I don't think it doesn't feel. It doesn't yet feel like second nature. Has the panic gone? It sort of returns on a Monday morning a little bit.

Speaker 1 20:07

Yeah, that first day I walked around school like a rabbit in headlights. You know, people asked me if I was okay and I just didn't know. I didn't know how to speak. It was a shock to the system. But yeah, I am getting there every day and, yeah, I can see how wonderful it's going to be once we are over this settling in period for me and for the children. So looking forward to the future, that's good. How about you, keely?

Speaker 3 20:36

Yeah, so pretty good. Yeah, we've got a lot, a lot of yeah it was. It was good where I've moved with a lot of my children that needs extra support, so that was really nice. I've moved with them.

Speaker 2 20:52

So it's for our listeners. Keely, you used to be in early years and now you've taken a role where you're supporting kids children in school that need a lot of extra support and you're doing that in the early years, where the only way we know how is in the Keely way I am and totally is in the Keely way.

Speaker 3 21:09

Totally is. I mean, we've got a court, a lovely little area. That was an outside area that a lot of our children really need to access. That actually in the classroom is too much for them sometimes. So we've got that and I'm doing sad digging area and we're doing woodwork and we're doing digging and we're doing planting. We're planting onions this week ready for over over winter. There you go, and garlic as well. That's gone in.

Speaker 3 21:40

It's all about, like that, relationships and those things that you need with those children that really still need it, and some of them are still still need that. They need to play. Yeah, they do need to play.

Speaker 3 21:53

Children need to play they do and they miss that and it's almost yearning for it and that actually they do need that space to play and that space to just feel free, almost, that actually a classroom can be very constricting for those children and they need to get out, and that's what I'm kind of there for, which is lovely, and I absolutely love my job.

Speaker 2 22:21

It's wonderful, I love it.

Speaker 3 22:24

Please do that so you feel, so you're feeling settled then Felt settled, even though my children aren't so much, but I'm settled, ready to help them to what they need.

Speaker 2 22:37

so you're creating that attachment?

Speaker 1 22:38

Probably, yes, that you've kind of done the role for nearly a year.

Speaker 2 22:41

Yeah, almost getting there.

Speaker 3 22:43

You know what you're doing.

Speaker 1 22:43

Yeah, how about?

Speaker 2 22:47

you, sarah, so I'm staying there.

Speaker 1 22:50

Yeah, a big change again for you. Oh, you're still in reception. I'm still in reception in the same classroom.

Speaker 2 22:57

I've got my staff member back.

Speaker 1 23:00

Oh yeah.

Speaker 2 23:02

My other half. Yeah, so the dream team are back, dream team. But the thing that has changed for me is that I have a student for the first time in my career. Wow, 13 years on and this is my first teaching student. Wow, and she's really lovely. She has already come from an early years back home so that's lovely. But I suddenly thought, oh, I actually better get a bit as she feels.

Speaker 3 23:33

It's not a game Looks like you know what you're doing and it has really tested me because I like to wing it.

Speaker 2 23:42

I'm not going to lie.

Speaker 3 23:43

I like to wing it In the early years.

Speaker 2 23:45

You can do that. You can just flip to the children's interest whenever you need. But I have realised that I do really need to think about what I'm actually doing, because I'm teaching so much?

Speaker 3 23:55

Why does someone else do it? How to do it. This is how you wing it.

Speaker 2 23:57

It has made me be a lot more organised. So, which is only good, that's always good but, yeah, it has definitely opened my eyes. That actually. Okay, sarah, yeah, you need to work on that a bit more. So, yeah, that is my big change, but yeah, I'm loving it.

Speaker 1 24:19

Good, positive start to the year, then it is. It is yeah, brings us on nicely to our send full.

Speaker 2 24:27

And I'm looking forward to this because I've never heard of this before. Are you ready?

Speaker 1 24:35

Okay, you say you've never heard of it. I was just scrolling back to that last one.

Speaker 3 24:40

So we want to talk about focus, breathing.

Speaker 1 24:43

Yeah, that's what it is Okay. So I, as you girls know, I'm a bit of like always looking for the zen, always looking for the mind.

Speaker 1 24:52

Yeah, the mind, the mindful moment, really. So I have started taking up meditation again in the mornings, when I wake up in the morning. So I've got an app on my phone. It's called the Balance app and it's I don't know if it's like promoted by the NHS, I'm not sure, but I just found it. But it is one that you pay for, but it's free for a year. So you sign up, you don't have to pay anything at all. You just put in your card details and it, and it gives you a year's free.

Speaker 3 25:22

It's amazing.

Speaker 1 25:22

It's a bit like, I suppose, is the mind app, which is quite. I think that's the same thing and it gives you like personalized meditation. So I've been doing that in the mornings and I've been doing this thing called focus breathing. Where it is. Basically you just focus on your breathing, so you can do different strategies to do that, so you just breathe at your normal pace.

Speaker 1 25:42

It's like a meditation, so you get comfy, you get quiet and you just try and focus on your breathing. And the different things you can do to help you are you can focus on the physical sensations of breathing, so as you breathe in you might notice that the air is cool and then as you breathe out, it's warmer. So you can focus on that. You can focus what happens to your sort of abdomen area, so as you breathe in, it all expands in your lungs and then as you breathe out, it disbands. Or you can use sort of counting to help you. So as you breathe in and you breathe out, you count one and then you repeat and you get to five and then you start again and it's just all about that mindfulness, like bringing it back to the present moment. And if you needed a moment, you can come into your cupboard recording studio or toilet and just have a little moment, just to have a bit of focus, breathing.

Speaker 1 26:35

So you might want to try that. This week You've been in particularly stressed.

Speaker 3 26:39

Yes, that Well, I'm going to rest.

Speaker 2 26:44

You're doing the mindful moment.

Relaxing Sound Bar Experience

Speaker 3 26:45

next podcast after this Well, I can't, I'll tell you about it. So I'm going to a sound bar for the weekend with my mum and she's treating me, so we're all going together and basically it is. So this lady does yoga, so it's kind of, but what it is is a really relaxing. She's got a studio or something. It's really, really relaxing what you do. You have to take a mat or something nice to lay on as many cushions as you want. Yes, you said you have to be like really cozy and really like comfortable, to like get to that. Is it hiking?

Speaker 2 27:30

Almost? Yes, I can't remember.

Speaker 3 27:32

Yes, it's a little bit like that, I think, and then like blankets and anything warm and basically to feel like people go in the pajamas and stuff. I'm obviously not going to go in the pajamas, but I know, but people do, so it's really really. You get yourself into such a cozy like happy place and that will help you to get to reach like this whole different level of zen. By playing sounds. I do a gong, so it's all done with a gong. That wasn't what I was expecting.

Speaker 2 28:03

Oh yeah, I was expecting that.

Speaker 3 28:05

This is something I've never known or never heard of One of those folds that you have a wand and you go round and it goes even in the description or I don't know. That might even be that, but I don't know, because I've not seen it.

Speaker 2 28:17

The gong sounds rubbing the top of the gong.

Speaker 3 28:21

Well, according to a lot of it is gong the gong.

Speaker 2 28:26

I can't wait. The gong has got where I head to when I think of it.

Speaker 3 28:31

Just wait, I've got a total open mind about this. I'm really looking forward to it, because I am I'm not entirely sure my brother's done it when he went on holiday and he said it was amazing and transported him to this completely different place in his mind and it was like life changing.

Speaker 1 28:50

So I'm waiting for it.

Speaker 3 28:51

This weekend it's a half seven In the evening. The only problem is that my mum said you've got to keep awake, you know, because that's the whole point of it. But you know what I will be. I'm really sorry. I have told the woman. I'm really sorry if you hear a funny snuffly noise.

Speaker 1 29:11

That's not one of the sound-offs when she's sleeping.

Speaker 3 29:15

She said, oh no, that's like a part of it. I said, well, if I'm really cosy and happy, I will be asleep.

Speaker 1 29:21

I'm going to sleep.

Speaker 3 29:23

My mum was like this is not a waste of money. No, mum, this is totally not a waste of money, because I don't have in my ear.

Speaker 2 29:31

Mum, mum, mum mum.

Speaker 3 29:33

And you've got that time away, even if I do fall asleep, I've maybe my mum's pay for me to come away for a bit and just chill out.

Speaker 2 29:41

When I once went to the gym, I say once In 1990s. It was a well known brand of gyms. Other gyms are available.

Speaker 1 29:52

I'm not going to mention it because I'm not coming in the.

Speaker 2 29:55

Anyway, on the menu board of the things that you could do at the gym there was like a sleep thing where you could go and they give you a sleeping bag and you sleep in these pods with these special lights that go over and you pay an hour to sleep.

Speaker 1 30:13

Wow.

Speaker 3 30:13

That's the kind of gym, I could get with a bag of wits. That's it.

Speaker 2 30:17

We had to go for a workout.

Speaker 1 30:20

I'd come back really refreshed. I was sweating, not reds, just like An extra stone heavy. An extra stone heavy.

Speaker 3 30:34

Ok well, I look forward to that. I'm really looking forward to it. I think it's going to be great If you come back into school wearing yoga pants.

Speaker 2 30:42

Yeah, headbands, bangle and we're all going.

Speaker 3 30:50

Ok You're star fluted on top To the sound bar, just a snoring.

Speaker 2 31:01

Ok, it was lovely to be able to come back together after the manicness of first weeks of term. We look forward to coming back together again. We promise, we promise we'll do routines. Watch this space.

Speaker 1 31:18

Have a good week everyone.

Speaker 2 31:20

Ok, bye.