The Wellness Connection with Fiona Kane

Daily Habits to Reduce Stress and Anxiety: What’s Really Helped Me | Ep. 114

• Fiona Kane • Season 1 • Episode 114

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Daily habits to reduce stress and anxiety have made a huge difference in my mental health—and in this video, I’m sharing the ones that truly work for me. These aren’t generic tips, but personal practices I’ve used to feel more grounded, clear-headed, and calm.

🌱 What you'll find in this episode:

 • How eating protein when anxious helps regulate my body and mind
• Why I do personal "audits" to check in with my mental state
• The importance of what I feed myself—food, media, thoughts, and relationships
• How connecting with nature and moments of awe shift my perspective

We’re all different, but I hope sharing what works for me helps you discover what might work for you too.

✨ Let me know in the comments - what habits help you manage stress and anxiety?

Learn more about booking a nutrition consultation with Fiona: https://informedhealth.com.au/

Learn more about Fiona's speaking and media services: https://fionakane.com.au/

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Credit for the music used in this podcast:

The Beat of Nature

Music by Olexy from Pixabay



Fiona Kane:

Hello and welcome to the Wellness Connection Podcast with Fiona Kane. Today I'm actually going to talk to you about mental health and anxiety and simply how I manage my own. I think sometimes it's useful to get to someone else's idea of what works for them. Now, what works for one person isn't always the same thing that works for somebody else, but I feel like if I at least share some of my strategies and some of these strategies well, many of them are strategies I've used with my clients you might get some benefit from them. So I thought I would start by sharing some of my strategies. So I suppose the first thing I would say is, when I do notice that I start to get start feeling quite anxious or start feeling for whatever better term, sometimes I feel like I'm not very grounded. I feel like I'm a bit all over the place and I feel almost like I've reached liftoff. I'm just kind of not grounded anywhere and I'm kind of flitting about and feeling very disconnected I suppose is the right term. One of the first things I actually do in that situation is I eat protein, because protein's really, really important for helping to ground you and helping to connect you. So that's one of the first things I will do. And so it could be some eggs or it could be some chicken or some fish or whatever it is, but I will sit down and I'll eat some protein, because I find that that's really good at grounding me. And sometimes.

Fiona Kane:

The other thing I would say to you is, whenever you are feeling if you just notice you're feeling a bit off something's different, whether that's physically or mentally, whatever it is I kind of do a bit of an audit, right. I do a bit of a review of like, okay, what's going on, what am I feeling? What's going on? And I might sort of, like I said, stop and have some protein first and just remember to breathe, like sort of calm my breathing down. But then what I will do is when I've sort of calmed down a bit and when I'm sort of sitting there, I will do an audit. And essentially by an audit what I mean is I think about what's going on. So if I'm sitting down to have some protein, I think, well, when did I last have some protein? What's going on? And I might find that I've been eating too many carbohydrates. I've just been having these carbohydrate-only meals, so maybe I've been eating, I don't know, like bread or muffins, or even just it might be healthier foods, but just too much without protein in it, right? So I will just notice have I been eating protein regularly? Have I been eating vegetables, or what have I been eating?

Fiona Kane:

I look at what's going on with my diet because sometimes I realize, oh okay, I went to a function last night and there wasn't much I could eat, so I actually had the pizza or whatever it was, and then this morning I didn't have a proper breakfast or whatever it is. But I just do a bit of an audit. I look back at things I've been eating. Then I'll look back at other things. So I'll look back at how much tea have I been drinking? Now, that's really the only caffeine I have tea and chocolate, right, but I'll look at those things.

Fiona Kane:

So, in your life, look at wherever caffeine might be coming from. Have you been having too much coffee or have you been starting to rely on energy drinks for energy? So it's just looking back on what I'm doing as far as caffeine goes. Am I overdoing the caffeine? Then I'll look at things like am I drinking enough water? And even though I love my tea, in between that tea, am I having the water, so just making sure I'm keeping hydrated as well. So there's simple things that sort of help you stay grounded, but also just help you review what's been going on, what might be affecting you.

Fiona Kane:

Then I will look at other things.

Fiona Kane:

So I will look at and I've talked to you before about what are you feeding yourself. Well, what you're feeding yourself isn't just your food, right? So what you you feeding yourself? Well, what you're feeding yourself isn't just your food, right? So what you're feeding yourself is stories that you're telling yourself, or it's people that you're spending time with, or it's things that you're watching, reading, listening to. So I'll start looking at well, what am I doing there and how is it affecting me? Like, what am I doing that's different, because last week I was feeling fine. This week I'm not. So what's going on? So I will be looking at. You know, have I been reading stuff? And it could be you're reading the news and that's not good for you, or you know. So sometimes reading the news might be good for some people and sometimes it's not. So it's just knowing that for yourself, or it might be.

Fiona Kane:

I'm listening to podcasts, but I'm not listening to ones that upset me, not ones that uplift me, or it might be I've been watching too many murder shows or CSIs or something like that. Maybe I need to watch something a bit more inspiring or just a bit more like a rom-com or something that's just a bit more kind of you don't have to think too much about. Maybe I've been watching too much television and I need to look at have I been going outside and have I been looking at the trees and looking at the birds and enjoying the world around me? Because sometimes we spend way too much time inside and we're not doing anything outside or going and enjoying being outside. And there is something about even if it's just going out into the backyard or a balcony that you have or standing at the front door, whatever your limitations might be, but there's just something about looking at the birds, looking at the animals, whatever it is.

Fiona Kane:

I was up the Central Coast looking after or just helping out a relative of mine on the last couple of days and I was looking out the back window and he has all of these birds come to visit him to get fed. But I was looking at there was, you know, a white cockatoo, and there was. He has this magpie family that comes to visit him and he has these crows, these gigantic crows, with this like I really like oily sort of oily skin oily, I don't want to call it fur, what do you call it? Coating anyway, on these crows and I'm just looking at these birds because they're pretty amazing to watch and watching them kind of argue with each other, that kind of thing. But I just I allowed myself to have a bit of awe and kind of just looked at these birds, you know.

Fiona Kane:

So sometimes it's just stepping back and looking outside of yourself and having awe, and when I'm up there I always do sort of a sunrise walk because it's on the beach. So I get really, really inspired by watching the sunrise over the beach down at sort of in Edelong and Yemina. It's beautiful there and so I love going there, being there for the sunrise, and even yesterday I went down there for the sunrise. Oh, no, it was the day before, actually, and it was when I first left his place to go to the beach. It was about a five-minute drive, it was pouring rain, right, and I just thought, no, no, I can see some space in the clouds there. I'm just going to drive down because, regardless of anything, even if I sit in my car and look at the water, that's good for me. So I just thought I'm going to drive down there, I'm going to sit there and look at the water and I'm going to wait and see what happens with the weather.

Fiona Kane:

And I sat in my car for 10 minutes while it rained quite heavily and then the rain eased right off, right, so I was able to get out. I just put my hoodie over my head just in case it started raining too much and I actually just grabbed a small umbrella because it was still raining a little bit. I did my walk and the rain pretty much stopped when I was halfway through my walk, right. But I would have missed it if I had said oh no, it's raining, I can't go right. I mean, if it was like lightning striking or something, obviously I wouldn't go in that. But this is just rain and it was no big deal. So I just went anyway, because I also know one thing that is absolute for my mental health is walking, moving my body.

Fiona Kane:

I have to move my body every day. If I don't, it affects my physical and mental health. So it's just something about walking. Obviously, we know all the things that walking does, but just talking personally, just the things that I look at, what it does is it clears my head, what it does is it allows me to have awe, because I do look around and because I'm on Instagram and all that sort of stuff.

Fiona Kane:

I will actually not always, but sometimes I'll look for things that I can photograph that are inspiring. Right, and I don't always photograph things. Sometimes I do. Sometimes I take photos of myself or take photos and all that kind of stuff, like influencers do Not that I'm really an influencer, but you know, sometimes I do that stuff. Sometimes I won't as well, because that's not good for my mental health on that day. But the good thing about thinking about things that you could take photographs of is you think, oh, what's inspiring here today? And I don't mean perfect photos, mean because there's no such thing. Like you know, I'm way past that. What I'm just talking about is I thought, oh, that flower is really pretty or that cloud's really nice, or look at the horse, or look at whatever it is. So I just do that kind of stuff. I look around for things that are beautiful or inspiring. I'll pay attention to the little birds. I say, oh, what's that little bird doing over there, or I'll pay attention to the butterflies or whatever it is, or the bees around a flower, or I'll pay attention to the butterflies or whatever it is or the bees around a flower. So I just try and pay attention and so that's really good.

Fiona Kane:

Having awe and just looking outside of yourself is really good for my mental health and I find that also it's just that kind of. The universe is bigger than us. Whatever's going on in our head it's so minute compared to the world. So just going out there and getting a bit of a what's the word? A juxtaposition or what's the other word, but just a contrast I can never think of the right words, but anyway, going out there and just getting a different point of view different perspective might be the word is really really good for my mental health.

Fiona Kane:

And looking for things that are in nature, that are beautiful, also really really good for my mental health. Moving my body, getting that circulation going, kind of getting, because I get really sore muscles and things, so it's really good for my muscles as well to be walking. All of those things really make a difference in just clearing my head, and sometimes I'll listen to podcasts on my walk. Sometimes I turn it off and I'm not listening to anything. But even if I'm listening to a podcast, it's never that loud that I can't hear first of all what's around me, because I want to be safe, but also I want to hear the birds and things like that. So you can sort of listen to things or not, depending on how well that works for your mental health and how well that works in your strategy. But sometimes actually just listening to nature is a really really good thing. It can be really beneficial. So all of those things, walking, being out in nature, makes a difference for me.

Fiona Kane:

So what else I do is I will and everyone knows this about me but I do love my tea and I make a ritual out of my tea. I always use pretty cups I've got, for those of you listening, I'm holding up my teacup and, excuse me, I'm just going to have a sip. I use pretty teacups. Sometimes I use special pots, those teapots. Sometimes I go out to my favorite cafe and get it might be a hot chocolate or it might be a pot of tea or something like that, and I do it because it's a ritual.

Fiona Kane:

I know I could do it at home, but there's something about going out and doing it somewhere else. It feels special, a bit of a ritual. I'll go up to Currajong there's lovely cafes there, currajong Village, and I will go out onto the balconies of those cafes or sit somewhere where I can see outside and I'll watch. There's a cafe in particular where they've got I think it's a. I was just trying to remember what. Is it an eagle, or is it a hawk? Anyway, a bird of prey of some sort that's out there. This nest must be nearby and I'll watch it out there and I'll watch it flying. I'll watch it flying over the top of me beautiful. So going there, having a ritual of a tea or whatever.

Fiona Kane:

So even just things like that, little rituals, rituals of things that feel special, that feel like you are nurturing or nourishing yourself so any kind of nurture and nourish ritual can be really, really helpful, because if you think back to when we were children, it would often be the thing that our mother would do for us, like the mother would make you some chicken soup, or in Australia it might be Vegemite toast or whatever. It is where you came from, something like that. So it might be somehow replicating that If you're lucky enough to still have your mum around. It might be to ring your mum as well. Mine's not here anymore, so I try and replicate little things that I might have done with her or that she might have done for me.

Fiona Kane:

Like I said before too, I just always remember about my breathing and I find and even just in this podcast you'll notice if you're listening I've just started to slow down because I'm thinking about my breathing and when I think about my breathing, I slow down because I talk and I talk really fast and that's just how I am, it's what I do, but I'm learning. When I remind myself about breath, I slow down. I remember to breathe and that's a good thing and that's why we do it, because I teach this all of the time. Does it mean I have it perfectly worked out? No, it does not, but I teach it and therefore I remember to remind myself about it, right? And so sometimes, during a consultation or during a podcast or whatever, I will remind myself about the art of breathing. I will slow down my breath, and that is really really good for me, right? So one of the breathing techniques I teach my clients I've talked about it on here before is a breathing technique where you breathe in for four seconds and out for seven seconds.

Fiona Kane:

So it's in for four, so you count to four seconds, out for seven, so you're breathing out for that little bit longer. And essentially what you do is, if you do this six times, so like one minute 60 seconds, then what happens is you reset your body and your nervous system back into rest and digest, so you take it away from the fight or flight which I would have talked about before. I might mention it again here, even though I have talked about it before back into rest and digest. So fight or flight. So our nervous system has different modes. It can be in and there's two main ones. It's kind of a few, but there's two main ones that people know about, and one is fight or flight and one is rest and digest. Now, fight or flight is there for a reason. It's there to deal with danger.

Fiona Kane:

Actually, I saw a video yesterday. That's the other thing I like doing for my nervous system. I just like watching cool videos. There was a video yesterday of a ranger, a safari driver. It must have been in Africa somewhere. He was sitting in his van car, whatever it was. He had these two. Was it one or two, I can't remember now no one. He had this. I think it was a cheetah, but whatever it was, it was a big cat, right, and it had come up and got really inquisitive and it was actually sitting right in front of him with its like no more than a foot away from him, even closer. I think it was really checking him out, right, and apparently what he was doing, because it showed you he was kind of looking away. He wasn't looking at it. Apparently, if you look them in the eye, that shows that you could be a threat to them. So he wasn't looking it in the eye, right, and he'd eventually kind of realized he wasn't a threat. So it went away.

Fiona Kane:

Obviously it wasn't hungry, but that would be a case where you would really be in fight or flight, right, for a really good reason. That would be fight or flight, and so fight or flight is a mode that we go in and it's like a protection mode to save us. Now, in his case he did the. Actually it's fight, flight or freeze, and he did the freeze method because I was like he wasn't going to be able to outrun this cheater thing. Whatever he was in the car, it was on his car so he couldn't drive off without it. It's not like he's going to start punching it out. So he did kind of the freeze and stay calm and look away and not look in the eye kind of method and it worked right.

Fiona Kane:

But in fight or flight what happens is our body sends it gets your heart going really fast and it's so it can send more oxygen and more blood and things around your body, right. And the reason being is because if you need to run or if you need to fight or whatever, you need that sort of extra sort of boost of energy. So it's sending around stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline and it's sending around stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline and it's sending around lots of oxygen to your arms and legs so you can run faster. It's also circulating to your eyes so you can see better. So basically everything that you need so that you can run or fight or whatever you need to do to get out of this emergency situation.

Fiona Kane:

And it's an amazing system because sometimes that actually saves our lives and we've all heard stories of people who have had a dog running after them and they've been at a scale, a six foot fence, and they normally couldn't do that, but they've been able to get over the fence. Or the mother who was able to lift a car off the pram when the baby's pram's been run over, or whatever, because a mother will have that have what would seem like a superhuman strength to save her child. So this is what we get to save ourselves. We get this sort of boost of all these stress hormones and this circulation. Now, that's a good thing if there's a cheetah sitting in your car or if there's a dog running after you that wants to bite you or attack you.

Fiona Kane:

It's not such a good thing in everyday life when it's just about a deadline or it's just thoughts that are going around in our head or whatever it is, because what's happening when you're in fight or flight? There's no circulation going to your reproductive system. There's no circulation going to your digestive system, because your body considers that if you are about to become lunch, you do not need to digest lunch, right, which is a pretty sensible system when you think about it. However, being in that system all of the time obviously isn't good for us, because it means that we don't digest our food. We end up with a whole lot more digestive symptoms, a whole lot more reflux and bloating and might be other issues at the other end. Whatever, but our digestion doesn't work well and food sits around for too long and also, because it's affecting your reproductive system, it might affect your sexual function as well. Those sorts of issues might even, if it's happening a lot, affect your fertility, who knows. So it is a real problem if this is happening all of the time.

Fiona Kane:

So it's important to understand how to take your body from fight or flight and move it back into rest and digest, and that is what that breathing technique does. So you do that four seconds in and seven seconds out, and what it does is it will pull your body out of fight or flight and put you into rest and digest, and so it's a really quick way of doing that and it's a really convenient one to do when you're having a meal. So I encourage my clients to do this before a meal to take themselves out of that fight or flight, put themselves into rest and digest, because when you're in that mode now, you're getting circulation to your digestive system and your digestive organs and now you can make digestive enzymes so you can break your food down. If you can break your food down, you can use the calories you can absorb and use the nutrients and you're not going to get all of those digestive symptoms of food sitting around not being digested right. So rest and digest is really, really important. So, and also that includes sleep. So that's the other thing I was going to get to is I look at my sleep and what I might find is I might find I've been having a second cup of tea at night and that's keeping me awake and getting up too many times to go to the loo.

Fiona Kane:

That's interrupting my sleep. All the caffeine's interrupting my sleep. Or I've been going to bed too late, or I might have been eating too late and so I'm laying in bed and I've got reflux because I ate at 10 o'clock or something like that. So I look at things to do with my sleep. Am I going to bed early enough? Is my sleep being interrupted? Am I watching something? Am I checking my Facebook likes or my argument that I'm having with someone on Facebook? Am I checking that right before bedtime? Not conducive to sleep guys. So just things like that I will look at. Am I getting enough sleep? If I'm not, what's affecting my sleep? What can I do to change that?

Fiona Kane:

So some of the other things that I do is I will look at things like if I've got stories going around in my head, I might just say to myself you know, is is that true? Is that helpful? What's going on here? You know, sometimes we've got to interrupt those thoughts because they're not helpful, and some of the other strategies I've talked about going for a walk, going out, whatever will help me interrupt that. Or maybe listening to a podcast or listening to some really good music dance around the house with some music, because what we want to do is we want to. I've talked to you before about things that can sort of boost your dopamine or boost your oxytocin and different neurotransmitters in your brain, and so things like music or dancing around and exercise all those sorts of things can do that. Or watching, like I've said before, watching cute videos I've been watching cute Capybara videos lately, but whatever little cute animal videos All of those things are really good for boosting different neurotransmitters in your brain, and so it might be things like that to boost the neurotransmitters that I do. So things to sort of just interrupt the thoughts I'm having, and sometimes I just say, look, is it true, is it helpful, how's it going to help me right now. Okay, so we just have to let that one go for now. Right? And?

Fiona Kane:

And sometimes it's action is the best thing it can do, because we do get caught in perseverating about things. So sometimes, rather than perseverating about things and going on and on and on, sometimes, like you know what, I'm going to take some action towards my goal, whatever that is. And one action can be yeah, I'm going to get up and have a shower. Another action can be I'm going to go for a walk. Another action can be I'm going to have some protein, and then it might be whatever the thing is that I need to do. It might be, you know, whatever the goal is, it might be I want to start a podcast.

Fiona Kane:

So you know, like, when I wanted to start my podcast, what was getting in my way is I didn't really know what system will I use and how much microphone will I use, whatever. So you know what I did. I asked people. You can either Google or I asked people, but I asked people who were already doing it what do you use, what do you do? What's the simplest thing? And they all said use this system, use this microphone, whatever. And then I just did that right, because I get really overwhelmed in the detail, those details, and I'm not very good at comparing those sorts of things. So I could have spent another 10 years kind of going, oh I don't know what sort of microphone to use, and I just asked people who knew right.

Fiona Kane:

And so what I started doing was, as I could afford it, I was getting those things, or I was downloading the system or going onto the website of the system and looking at the different plans. So one thing might be you go on and you choose a plan that day, or you might go on and you might watch a YouTube video about how to film things or how to do certain things, or you might ask someone or go and look at the reviews of a camera, whatever it is. But you just start, you just begin, you do something, and that's what I did with this podcast is I just began. Now I'm not Jo Rogan, I don't have the biggest, most amazing podcast in the whole wide world, that's okay.

Fiona Kane:

But what I did is I started and now I'm sort of more and more. I'm getting better at different parts of it, I'm learning different strategies and, as and when funds are available, I'm getting support from other people and help with different strategies or aspects that I don't understand or that I don't know about, and that's fine. But now I have a podcast and I've got over 100 episodes of this podcast, whereas I could still be sitting thinking about what sort of microphone do I need, right? So sometimes you just need to begin, you need to start, you need to get some action because, as I've talked about before, action builds momentum. So sometimes we just need to take an action. The action could be as Jordan Peterson talks about all the time. It could just be make your bed right, but sometimes action and that's what I would also recommend.

Fiona Kane:

If you are someone who is at home a lot or you're working from home, I would make a point of have that shower and get dressed, because there's something about spending the day in your pajamas that is really not motivating at all. The other thing that I do that I find really really helpful is I do butterfly tapping. You'll have to probably watch the video if you want to see what this is or Google what that is, but essentially I put my thumbs together with my hands, with my palms facing me. I put my thumbs together so that my hands look like, kind of look like butterflies, and then what I do is I put my hands over my chest with my thumbs still hooked in together and I go tap, tap, side to side, side to side, side to side, tap, tap, tap, tap. So you will have to probably watch a YouTube video to see this or Google butterfly tapping. But essentially, look and I can't even remember the science but there's something about when you hit either side, when you hit side to side, it stimulates both sides of your brain and there's something about that that can be very calming.

Fiona Kane:

The other thing is that what you're doing is you are it's like a hugging. You're hugging yourself, so it's also got that benefit, and it's also that tap, tap, tap, that tap, tap and hugging it. It is almost like you know what I was talking about before, like the soothing, that like what your mother might have done for you when you're a baby, if you were lucky when you're a child. So it is kind of a self-soothing method that I use. So sometimes I use that if I'm feeling anxious as well. So, uh, so that might be useful for you, that might be something that you could try. So really, it's just like when you're having these issues. It's remember to breathe. It's remembering to notice things outside of yourself. Go outside, look at the universe. Have a bit of gratitude as well, like I have the gratitude that I can go outside and that I can see the beautiful cockatoos or eagles or whatever the birds are that I'm looking at when I'm outside. I just have such gratitude that I can see them. I live somewhere where I can see them and they are really beautiful and I can admire their beauty.

Fiona Kane:

Do a bit of an audit to see what have you been consuming and that might be food-wise, but also media-wise and other things. Are you regularly watching something now that's making you feel stressed? Are you putting a news or a podcast or something on first thing in the morning? That's actually starting your day with making you feel really stressed. Or are you looking at all your emails and messages first, when maybe you'd be more productive if you started with just by doing your work, or you started by doing a meditation, or started by going for a walk or just started by listening to music. That really you know that is really fun to listen to music. That's really inspiring. So kind of look at your daily routine and look at little places where you might be able to make little tweaks. But so, essentially, do an audit. If you're not feeling good mentally, do an audit of what's going on. Obviously, the other thing is to reach out if you need to. So it's reach out to a mental health professional or ring Lifeline or talk to a friend or something like that. So obviously, if something feels like it's beyond you, reach out for help and get support for that. But these are all kind of just a little kind of everyday strategies, the sorts of things that I use in my life. That I find makes a really, really big difference.

Fiona Kane:

The other thing, too, is to learn to laugh at yourself. Honestly, it makes a big difference when we learn how to laugh at ourselves. We do take ourselves too seriously and I know that I'm absolutely guilty of that, even just like yesterday that our relative I was with. I took him for a medical appointment and on the way back from the medical appointment I took the wrong turn and I thought I'd take it. He said where are you going? I said I'm going back the way I came and he didn't say anything. And here I am all of a sudden. I just realized I'm in a completely different place and I just realized I'm in a completely different place and I said why don't you tell me? He said I tried to tell you and I just laughed and I said, oh, and it ended up being the shortcut home. It ended up being the long cut home. So it took much longer to get back, but it was pretty.

Fiona Kane:

And I said, oh, look, hey, I always just laugh about my sense of direction and and, uh, you know how good I am at navigating, you know. But I laughed, I just said, well, we always get there, don't we? Because we do always get there, sometimes I just go the wrong way, or I think I know which way I'm going and I don't. So, you know, I just laugh at myself and make it just a fun moment, because sometimes in life they're the fun moments in life that you look back on and you laugh at. Remember, when I took the wrong turn, you know. But instead of you know, freaking out about it, I just enjoyed listening to the bell burns and had a laugh at how great my sense of direction was and how sure I was. I was so sure, I was so sure that I was going the right way. I'm just retracing the way I came here? Well, no, obviously I wasn't, but that's okay, right. So it's sort of being able to go with the flow and laugh at yourself and kind of you know what is it? Life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Well, my lemonade was listening to the bell birds and kind of going oh well, like it's a different way, hey, different view and different things. To look at a bit longer in the car so we can have a bit of a laugh, fine, right. So those strategies I use.

Fiona Kane:

I hope that you find some of them really helpful. Please like and subscribe and share and rate and review the podcast. It really helps other people to find out about it and I really would love to be doing more of these and doing them more regularly. And the more that people hear about it, the more that I'm able to do that. So please support me in any way. You can Click on the bells and the subscribe buttons and all those things wherever you're listening to or watching this podcast. I hope you have a great week and I'll talk to you next week, thank you.

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