Iran vs US News: How Polarization Shapes the Way We React to Global Events | Ep. 149

In this episode, Fiona Kane shares her thoughts on the latest Iran vs US news and why so many people respond to world events through the lens of political polarization. She talks about the hope for positive change in Iran, how reactions from the United States and beyond often fall into predictable “teams,” and why it matters to step back and think for yourself.

Fiona also looks at how conversations about leaders like Donald Trump, COVID debates, and cultural issues turn into all-or-nothing arguments. She explains how tribalism, fear, and social pressure push people into fixed beliefs, making genuine discussion harder.

What you’ll hear in this episode:

 - why people take instant sides when news breaks
 - how political polarization distorts our understanding of global events
 - how to question your own assumptions
 - the value of listening to people you disagree with
 - why nuance matters in politics, health, and everyday life

If you’re trying to make sense of the constant outrage cycle or want a calmer, clearer way to look at current events, this episode will give you space to think.

Learn more about Fiona's speaking and media services: https://fionakane.com.au/

Credit for the music used in this podcast:

• Intro Music by  Musinova from Pixabay
• Outro Music from Pixabay

Transcript

Opening And Hopes For Iran

Fiona Kane 0:14

Hello and welcome to the Wellness Connection. I'm your host, Fiona Kane. I'd like to start today by talking about Iran, and I think it is great news that it looks like the US and Israel have teamed together to uh free the Iranians. I hope that that's how it turns out. I hope that Iran gets to be great again, and the women especially are freed in Iran to be who they want to be. So um I hope that that's a hope that this is actually uh rescue and not just another war. And I think that it is at this stage, but you know, I'm not a great geopolitical brain. I'm just observing from my personal perspective. But I hope that it is true that it yeah, it's a liberation and that's what it turns out to be. Uh, these things are always bloody and challenging and awful, and that's I'm not pretending that people don't die when these things happen, they absolutely do. But let's just hope that it's minimal and the outcome is good. Uh, so that's the first thing I'd like to say because after all this time and um and so many people ignoring the plight of the Iranians, I'm glad that somebody's listened and somebody's potentially helped them. So fingers crossed that all that all turns out uh a lot better than you know I that turns out well. So the next thing I'd like to talk about today, I thought I would focus on my encouragement to you is to take a step back and to really make sure that you are listening and really make sure that you're also questioning. And when I say questioning, I'd say question yourself and why you believe certain things. Question other people why they believe certain things, question maybe what someone gets out of convincing you to believe a certain thing, or or what they get out of saying a certain thing. And really, whether it be around health, whether it be around politics or what whatever cultural things, it's a really good idea to take a step back, especially right now, because honestly, pretty much I'd say since Trump hit the scene 10 odd years ago, down that escalator, the golden escalator or whatever it was. Ever since that moment, the world has lost its ever-loving mind, and people seem to have kind of just they're on one side or the other. Either Orange Man is incredibly bad and evil, and we must be in a constant, constant fear, constant terror, and constant uprising against him. On the other side of it, there are people who are a bit too far the other way, where Orange Man, everything he says and does is good and wonderful, and he can't do any wrong. The truth is there's in-betweens because there are in-betweens. People aren't all one thing or aren't all the other thing. And um the problem is people have kind of taken up with like one end or the other end, and they're talking past each other, can't hear each here, can't hear each other. And it's not just about orange man, it's about whether it's it's about all the different politics in different countries, but it's even like about health. Like in COVID, people were talking past each other. Like people have kind of just taken sides, and you know, even just now with okay, so this Iranian thing, you know, the Jane Fonders of the world are out there. She always picks the wrong side, that woman, in my opinion. That's my opinion, anyway. But she's out there, you know, supporting the Ayatollah, and I just anyway. Uh, you know, I suppose because it's Israel, and if Israel do it, it's bad, so it's gonna be bad. And yeah, I mean, Orange Man and Israel do something together, it's gotta be bad because they're all bad, you know, because that's just the rules, you know. Um, my encouragement is just to have some nuance with things and think about things. Now, you may completely disagree with things I say, or completely agree, or say, oh, she's right about that, don't agree with her about that. That's healthy, that's fine, that's normal, that's okay. But allow yourself to think, allow yourself to assess it and ask yourself why do you think a certain thing? If orange man is always great, why? If orange man is always bad, why? Or whatever this is, whatever the question is in regards to. But my encouragement is to rather than fall back on your usual response, and this could be in many things in life, this could be in your relationships or your friendships, it could be your work situations. My encouragement in even health, I've talked about this at length in regards to health, in you know, how we kind of have these autopilot things we go into and our automatic beliefs or all the uh you know the stories that we tell ourselves hold us back, all of that kind of thing, right? Language is important. I talked a lot about that last week, and um and the stories we tell ourselves are really important and really powerful, and what I'm finding at the moment is some really, really strong stories going around. And look, I've got some myself, I get that, so I'm not not having a go at people for having their stories, but try and do what I'm trying to do, and what I try and do is even though you might have a strong belief or a strong story, challenge it sometimes. Like, I will go and listen to a podcast of someone I completely disagree with and go, all right. What is it that this person's saying? What could I learn? Is there something that they're going to say that might uh, you know, that and and sometimes look often I'm just kind of like, oh man, this person's so full of it, don't agree with it, whatever. And that's fine. But sometimes I'm actually kind of like, oh, I didn't think of it that way. And maybe I've learned something and learned something that's wrong about what I'm thinking, or maybe I've just learned something to help me understand what they're thinking, which is useful because hey, we want friends and we want to exist in the world, and not everyone thinks the same way as you. So it's really handy to kind of get a bit of an insight into why someone might think the way they do. And I would also encourage talk to people. I I had um like a few weeks ago, I talked about how I was um I was rallying against uh Grace Tame because she was calling for terrorism, which I don't think is ever a good thing, regardless of your purpose behind it. And um, and I had you know a Facebook friend who's, like I said before, is someone who is a very spiritual person, a lady who is older than me, very experienced, spiritual, sensible, grown-up person who cracked it because I was saying that Grace Tame was behaving badly. Oh no, because because because genocide and kids and blah blah blah. So apparently, because genocide and kids and blah blah blah, Grace Tame can call for terrorism and for death and destruction. Apparently that makes it okay. Oh, okay, I didn't realise that. Anyway, so anyway, long story short is this person looks like they've you know blocked me and unfriended me on Facebook and whatever. And look, again, that's fine. We all make those decisions ourselves about what we want to hear and what we don't and what we want to be exposed to and what we don't. But I would have thought a more grown-up thing would be to actually reach out to the person and say, now she could have said to me, Look, Fiona, I'm really concerned with you making these judgments about Grace Tame. Can you explain to me what you mean? Because, you know, I think that she's great and I think that she's wonderful, and I know I think that the cause is so great that terrorism is the way to go. I don't know, whatever. But she could have actually asked me and had a discussion with me, but instead she's made some leap of, oh, maybe I've become, you know, Orange Man, bad, crazy, you know, can't listen to me, can't talk to me, therefore, can't listen, don't want anything to do with her block, right? Someone who's, you know, she's always known and known for a long time and known to all the things about me that you know most people know I'm pretty sensible and generally pretty kind and and whatever. But you know, she's made this sweeping discovery of that I'm evil and bad or whatever, and blocked me. And you know, again, her choice totally up to her. But I would just encourage you that to say that that's maybe not the way to go. Um, it's actually really, really worth maybe finding someone in your friendship group or it might be in your Facebook groups or you or whatever, someone that you feel comfortable with and saying, Look, I've noticed that you post these things about this topic. And it could be, look, I don't know much about it. Can you tell me a little bit about this? Can you tell me from your perspective what this is about? And and then, like, why do you think that? And what makes you think that, and whatever? And that you might then go and talk to someone with the whole the whole opposite or some other opinion and and have the same conversation. But I encourage you to actually have conversations with people because you might find out more than what you realize. I certainly do I learn by having these discussions with people. I've learned all the things I've learned up till now by having discussions with people. Because I remember when Orange Man was first selected, and I thought, you know, a part of me thought, oh, this could be good, something different. And the other part of me thought, oh my god, it could be the end of the world. And I know that there's a lot of that talk going around. And I've heard and listened to both sides of it, and on balance, I think he's doing more good in the world. Has he done everything perfect? No, but I think he's doing more good in the world. That's just my opinion. Uh, but I'm happy to discuss it with people and discuss why. And I'm also happy to hear people's opinions or why not, or whatever it is. But if we're not prepared to have those discussions, we lose. We really lose. And what I'm seeing happening is, particularly in the in the caring community, that the people who are, you know, counselors and and you know, care carers, that the kind of people who are in general, and the artistic community, whatever, the kind of people who in general are more of the caring, compassionate kind of people. I've really seen those people in particular, I think because they are caring, kind people, be really, really swept away by this fear, all these fears, that are really, really unhelpful. So, you know, I've talked before about the omnicoles and how, you know, it's kind of one of those things now that honestly, once you know what somebody thinks about one thing, you know what they think about everything, right? So, you know, if you meet someone and they've got blue hair and an septum piercing, right? You know that they're not supporters of Trump or any conservatives, right? Uh, you know that they're probably vegans, uh, you know that they're probably uh, you know, they they're waving the flag for Gaza and all that kind of stuff. There's just things you just know automatically, and you know that big climate change, alarm us, etc. So there's certain things that, you know, people have this omnicor, so they all do this one, and and the omni cause is not a good idea. Uh I think that it's really useful to think about every cause and every situation on an individual basis. So you might think that climate change is an existential threat. That's a hard word to say. Um, or you might not, and you might have your opinion about that, and you can have your opinion about that, but then it doesn't have to be the same in another category. So the problem is what we do is because we're tribal creatures and because we don't like the stress of feeling like we don't belong, or we're different, or we have a different opinion, or we don't like being ostracized because ostracision is a very big tool being used in the world at the moment. What we do is we do the omni cause. So once we decide, oh, okay, yeah, I think uh climate change is the biggest deal ever, and we've got to like get rid of all, you know, zero emissions and net neutral and all the things like carbon neutral, whatever it is. Once we decide that, oh, that's something we oh, I believe in that thing, I believe in that thing. Well, how about you just like follow the science and you might believe it that it means this at the moment, and then you read some more and you think, oh no, I've really more that. So I don't like this believe in the science, full stop, forget, but set and forget thing. But anyway, whatever. So you decide whatever your feeling is about that thing, but then another thing comes up, and then you just go along with what the people who believe about that thing believe about the next thing. And it's on both sides. I'm not saying that, like, you know, it could be the same with you know, whether it's right or left, we'll kind of go, oh well, you know, all of the people that I bel that I think the same that I agree with on this topic, well, they all think that, so therefore that must mean that. So, you know, Israel's good or Israel's bad, or you know, Palestine, this, blah, blah, blah, whatever the whatever the topic is, right? And people on all sides of politics are just as uh like, you know, at risk of this and guilty of this, whatever. Why not have an in unique and different opinion on each different topic based on you researching it, based on your thoughts and feelings, and you kind of sounding it out. And again, talk to someone on both sides. So the person who you have an opposite opinion about in regards to the Australian election or whatever, you might have the same opinion in regards to electric vehicles, I don't know, or you might have like a different opinion in regards to uh green energy, you might have the same opinion in regards to what you think about I don't know, the trans issue, like whatever. Well, what I'm I suppose a long story short of what I'm trying to say is allow yourself to think about the issues, allow your and allow yourself to be questioned and to question yourself. Get very aware of when you're not doing that, because if you're not doing that or you're not letting that happen to you, it's a cult, you know. Um, Scientology, you know, they kind of say, Oh, you can't talk to that person because they're a suppressive person. So essentially what they do is they just rule out all the people that you can't talk to. You can only talk to people who believe in the Scientology cult, and if you in no one else you can talk to or deal with because you know they're suppressive people. And people do that the same thing in whether it's be about climate change or whether it be about orange man, good, bad, whatever. People do the same thing, and so and what they do is so so to tell you to make you feel better about your opinion. So you think X, whatever it is that you think, and say that is different to what I think about something. So say I present an opinion here, like I think that what happened in Iran is probably overall going to be a good thing in the long run, fingers crossed. So that's my opinion at this point in time. So say you just think the complete opposite to that. You completely disagree with me, right? Say, but but how about you think, or why wonder why Fiona thinks that? Let me just look a bit more into that. Now you could still go, no, I just don't agree with her, or you might discover something, but what we do instead is we say, like it'll be, oh, I don't need to listen to Fiona because, well, she's just an idiot, right? Or I don't need to listen to that person because, well, they're not a you know scientist in blah, blah, blah. Or I don't need to listen to that person because, well, I they support Trump, so you know that they're an idiot, right? Or I don't need to listen to that person because they didn't support Trump, so I know they're an idiot. Whatever it is, right? But what we do is we put, you know, and that's when uh, you know, over the last few years we've done it a lot where we kind of go, uh, we put people in categories. So you can't listen to anyone that has any alternative opinion on vaccination because they're anti-vaxxers. Well, that's convenient, isn't it? It's a convenient excuse to not question any science, isn't it? Oh, I don't even have to think about that. No, I know. You cannot think about, you know, you cannot talk to anyone. How about, you know, there's some validity, validity here. There's that's an argument that's useful. That's not so good. I agree with this, not that. But no, we're not willing to do that and think about things because that's hard. And it is hard, and I'll tell you what, and I'll tell you one of the reasons that you might find it the hardest, that there's two two big things that are coming to mind right now about why you might find it hard to question your beliefs or um or think something different. One is like I said, we are tribal creatures, and it's easier to be part of a tribe, just go along with what the tribe's saying, you know. So there was a tribe during COVID who were like wearing 7,000 masks and getting 7,000 boosters, and it was all the best thing in the whole world. And there was a tribe that was saying, no, I'm not doing any of that stuff, right? Uh, and most people were like one or the other. And we felt like we we really had to, you know, get as much support as we can so get as many people to agree with us and just so we can feel comfortable in our choice because a choice that might affect your health or the health of your family or whatever, it's it's scary, it's frightening. So we want to be sure, right? So what we did is we got on whichever side we thought was the sure side, and we were very convinced that the other side was wrong and bad, and you know, we had our team, and you know, we had to believe in it, and we do that because we want to believe in it, because it's like what's what if we're what if we're wrong? If we're wrong, the stakes might be big, and because the stakes might be big, we can't afford to be wrong. So we have to be right. We absolutely have to be right. So we have to choose a team, we have to choose the right team, and we have to be right. So a big part of it is just like we need as human beings, we need to be part of a team, we need to be part of um you know the tribe, and being kicked out of the tribe is actually huge consequences because once upon a time when you were kicked out of the tribe, it was certain death, literally, right? It's not now, but it was at one point, and we still react as if it is now, even though it's not the case. Um, but also questioning stuff can be really hard, especially if it's to do with health and that kind of stuff. It's like, oh, do I believe the thing about this? And they say this about cholesterol, but they say that about cholesterol, they say this about vaccines. It's much harder just to know the truth and just like know what to believe or know who to believe, right? So one of the reasons we don't like to question things is that we just it's just too hard, we don't want to think too hard. And it really is, and the other is, you know, the other reason is that we want to be part of the tribe and we want to fit into our tribe. And so the two two like really, really major reasons why we don't want to rock the boat in any way. And you know, to be honest, it is, I think I talked about this a few weeks ago when I was talking about the people of the Omnicalls. Which t-shirt should I have this week? Is it Black Lives Matter? Is it Orange Man's Bad or whatever it is, right? Queers for Palestine, whatever this week's thing is. Now, the good thing about being part of, say, like the woke left, which I'm not talking about just the average person of the left who you know had the traditional beliefs that I had for most of my life about fairness and equality and all that sort of stuff. But I'm talking about the absolute crazies, uh, who there's a lot of at the moment, or they say this the loudest anyway, so the ones who hear from the most. The thing about being in their tribe right now is their tribe is the one of kindness. And you know, they're kind and they're open-minded and they're inclusive and they're compassionate. So, you know, they're so inclusive that they include all of the people that cancel out them and harm them, but hey, you know, but they're kind and they're compassionate, right? And of course, most of their kindness and compassion is performative kindness and compassion, the one where you say all the right things and the nice things, but you don't really believe it, and you act in a really nasty way. Uh, you know, and another example of it is, you know, like all the Hollywood types who like, you know, like Billy Eilish and Mark Ruffalo and all of these idiots who, you know, they they go to some award ceremony where there's like sharpshooters on every corner around them and and security there, and fences and walls and tickets and a whole lot of reasons why no one can get in there, and then get in there and preach about we shouldn't have borders and borders are bad and nobody's illegal. It's like sure, Jan. Sure. And although you know they they preach for um defund the police, you know, and they've got they're surrounded by you know armed securities, like keeping them safe, and they live in gated communities with security and staff, and they they walk out of their home and get into their fancy car or into their helicopters or their planes or their you know their limousine-driven you know car uh with their security, and they make procla proclamations and decisions and ideas about how the world could be that are never going to affect them. That's the other thing I would say to you is when people are preaching whatever they're preaching, just ask yourself, is it going to cost them anything? Because so many people who have such great advice at stuff that costs them nothing, right? So they they get the the blessing of being the wonderful, kind person that gets to say these lovely, wonderful, compassionate things, but they don't actually have to do anything, they don't have to follow through. That that doesn't actually seem to matter in this world now. You don't have to follow through, you just have to say the nice things. Because as long as you do performative compassion, we all clap like seals and we all think we're wonderful and we're all kind, you know. And you know, not only do they not have to do anything kind or be what they say they are, you know, like I said, they don't have to live with the consequences so that ordinary people deal with the author the consequences of not having funding for. The police and and um of not having borders and those kinds of things, but they don't have to live with those consequences. So that so just be aware of you know if you're following people or listening to people who don't deal with the consequences or people who live in a fantasy world. I mean, actors live in a fantasy world, they spend most of their time pretending to be somebody like you know, they're not they're not necessarily the best people to listen to about political stuff, right? Um, I might not be either, I'm just one of many voices, but my encouragement is listen to many voices, listen to many and just question your beliefs, whether it's you agree with me, but you still question that, or whether it's you don't agree with me and you question that, whichever it is. But be prepared to question the the when you hear yourself saying things, questions what you're saying to yourself. If you're saying yourself the same old thing, the same old thing that puts you back in the same situation. If you hear yourself being really definite about some political thing or whatever, and you're like a bit too definite that you know you can't possibly stop and let yourself think, maybe it is time to stop and think. And be prepared to talk to people and ask questions of people that have a different opinion rather than just shutting them down or you know, blocking them or whatever. Say, look, I'd I'd really be interested to know. Can you tell me why did you believe that? I just can't see it for myself. I'm not sure, I don't understand. Why is it that you believe that? And you know, and and talk to someone else who doesn't and get them to sort of, you know, say, get basically get people to straw man and strongman the arguments, you know, get someone to on both sides to have discussions with people and don't shut it down. It can't be, oh I don't want to talk to her because she's an idiot. Um, you know, just have discussions with people. You will learn stuff. Uh, you'd be surprised in what you will learn. The other thing too is be aware if all of the things you're saying to yourself are making you feel fearful all of the time, question what you're saying to yourself as well. Like I see Rosie Donald, Rosie O'Donnell, Rosie O'Donnell, uh, who comedian who's not particularly funny anymore. And she, you know, she left the US because her and her non-binary autistic child, I think it is, would not be safe under Trump's government because, like, yeah, he went after all the non-binary autistic people. Yeah, of course, right. Anyway, though, so she had to leave because they weren't safe. Yet she every day all she does is talk about him and how terrible he is and how terrifying he is. And even her therapist is saying to her, stop it, like stop, stop obsessing over him, stop watching him. If it's like if he freaks you out that much, just don't, right? But she's like somehow addicted to it and somehow, somehow needs to keep feeling that, you know, and and I think it's like there's a there's this, I've talked about it before, the activism thing. Like activism can be good and activism can be bad, but there's a lot of very, very damaged people. Grace Tame would be one of them. Not no offense to them for being damaged. People get damaged for a whole bunch of different reasons, and I like I really feel for people who are damaged, right? So it's not like a sweeping judgment on people who are damaged. However, people who are quite damaged are at a big risk of like getting involved in activism that maybe isn't that helpful for the world or for themselves. And often because they're so angry or so hurt or so empty or whatever the situation going on, and so anxious, they really get in these big fights where they're off, you know, sticking themselves to paintings or you know, screaming at screeching at people and whatever about climate, whatever the thing is. And a lot of these people are very fearful and like that they are absolutely disturbed by you know, they listen to every word that whether it's orange man or whoever it is, they listen to every word of what these different politicians and stuff say and then let it frighten them. And they they all think that, you know, every time that orange man does anything, oh my god, it's World War III, we're all gonna die, right? Or, you know, he didn't, doesn't want to do uh he doesn't want to do net zero, oh we're all gonna die. Uh, you know, he he he disagrees with one thing, oh, he hates all gay people. No, he doesn't, you know, but whatever it is, but you know, and they even interview women in the US and they say like they they go around universities at the moment, the kids all say, oh, they'd rather be under Hamas than under the US government because they're fearful of their rights as women or gay people under the US government, they think they'd be doing better under Hamas. Now that's a bloody good story you're telling yourself, isn't it? Or maybe not such a good story. So, you know, if you find yourself like really, really frightened about a lot of things in the world right now, either just turn off the news for a while, it's not good for you, or just question your response to it. Because so many people have such an immediate visceral response to every word the Orange Band or other people in the media or other people in politics say that they're clearly not like just listening and using their, you know. I suppose that's where I'd like to end this is to say, even though feelings are important, and I've talked a lot about why feelings are important, they're not everything. And what a lot of what the left do these days, it's all about the feeling. Like I said, you know, I oh I'm compassionate and kind. I said the kind and compassionate thing. I'm done now, right? That's all I had to do, because I'm feeling good about that, you know. And sometimes we've got to use our common sense, sometimes we've got to use facts, and so much of it is feeling. Oh, but he's bad because I said he's bad, because he's bad, because it's like, you know, because he's dangerous, because it's like, yeah, maybe, maybe not. But how about like just take a few steps back and question each step along there? Because what we've done, and again, on all sides, it's happened to certain extents, is we paint ourselves into a corner where it's like, oh my god, and we had this immediate visceral reaction, visceral reaction to everything. It's all bad, it's all stupid, it's all this, it's all that, and sometimes it's very damaging for our health. So just think about how you think about politics and how that affects your health. Think about how you connect to the world and and you know, everything to do with the the world and community and and um all of these issues, society. Um are you telling yourself stories that are helpful or not? Do you need to think rethink the way that you approach things or the way that you do things or the way you think about things to support your physical and or mental health? And do you ensure that you listen to or talk to people with different opinions to yourself to question just a little like shake things up a bit? It doesn't have to shake things up every so often because sometimes when you feel like yourself, get into it, like whatever it is, left, right, wherever you are, somewhere in the middle, sometimes we get ourselves into a spot where we're kind of just like not growing and not learning. And it's just really, really useful to shake things up and encourage yourself to listen and learn more. So, anyway, um, I suppose that is the moral to the story is uh shake things up a bit, listen and learn more. Question the stories you're telling yourself. And if you if you're if you're absolutely frightened to death about everything going on in the world right now, I think you're telling yourself lots of negative stories and there's lots of really good things happening as well. And um, and and the fact that half of the world can look at what's happening in Iran and go, and and like watch the people dancing on the street in Iran and the women dancing on the street and how wonderful it is, and how you know they've been freed and how they're being, you know, this is a rescue and how wonderful this is and hopefully will and could be. And the other half are going, I mean, orange band's just this horrible thing, along with you know, other bad men in Israel, it's evil and bad. The fact that people have two different, like half of the world is like celebrating, you know, oh my god, and we're looking at the Iranian people and going, oh my god, they're so happy, isn't it? It's wonderful, finally, and we can see that and actually have joy about what's going on, and you know, the Jane Fonders of the world are out there railing against it. Just, you know, that's that's what I'm just saying. Just sometimes it's not even like one person's right and one person's wrong, but there's nuance and there's something's right and something's wrong in both in a situation. But just allow yourself to question that, allow yourself to kind of say, Oh, it's not all one thing. Let's question things. And if I'm ruining my physical and mental health over this stuff, I really need to think about what I think about, what I expose myself to, who I expose myself to, and whether or not I'm um letting myself um think enough and not just kind of tell myself some story or be have someone else tell me a story. Anyway, I'll leave it at that uh podcast where I like to talk about things, you know, we have real conversations about things that matter. And this stuff is really, really affecting our mental and physical health at the moment. So we really need to have these discussions. Uh and give me any feedback, like, subscribe, feedback rate, review, and please share this with people so they they can get involved as well. Love to hear your thoughts, and I'll talk to you again next week. Thanks. Bye.