111: The difference between people who move abroad… and the people who don’t

Why do some people uproot their lives, move abroad, and thrive — while others stay stuck dreaming about it for years? In this episode, we break down the real difference between the people who make the move… and the people who don’t. And it has nothing to do with personality, luck, or being “naturally adventurous.”

I walk through the mindset traits that separate the doers from the dreamers — the people who take gritty, imperfect action versus the ones who wait for the perfect plan. We cover how movers build confidence through small wins, handle fear differently, ignore the naysayers, and protect their dream until it’s strong enough to share. You’ll hear why identity plays a bigger role than logistics, how future-based decision making works, and why emotional resilience matters more than knowing every step upfront.

If you’ve been thinking about moving abroad but haven’t started, this episode will help you understand what’s been holding you back — and what to shift so you can finally take action.

At the end, I’ll prompt you to reflect on which mover traits you already embody and which ones you want to strengthen.

Take the Which European City Should You Move To? quiz, and send me a DM with the part of the episode that resonated most.

👉Take the free quiz: Which European city should you move to? 🤔

Grab my free guide: 5 exact steps to move abroad

Website: jordangiberson.com
Instagram: @jordan.giberson

Transcript

0:00

You're not being selfish if you move abroad, you're not crazy for wanting more. It's not that you are not grateful for the life you have, and you might have an amazing life. You might have amazing friends, an amazing home, a great job that you don't really want to leave behind, But I think you have to prioritize that life that you want. Hey, my name is Jordan Giberson. I'm a Texas girl living and thriving in London. The best thing I've ever done? Moving abroad, hands down. And I'm passionate about helping others do the same. Are you curious about finding a job abroad? You're in the right place, friend. I'll teach you the tried and true secrets of how to make moving abroad a reality for you and how to live a fulfilling life once you get there. We'll cover topics like choosing the best visa for you, how to get a job offer in another country, how to get over your fear of moving abroad, and how to live a life you love once you get there, this is The Move Abroad Podcast. Hello and welcome to another episode of the Move Abroad podcast. Today we have an interesting question, which is, what is really the difference between people who move abroad in the end and the people who don't? Why do some people pick up their lives, start fresh in a new country and thrive while others stay stuck in the dream phase forever? What is the difference between these people? So today we're digging into this, might I say philosophical question, which is about the mindset traits that these people who actually move abroad have It's really the mindset traits, not the logistics that separate the movers from the non movers. And I really think that you can train yourself to have these mindset traits and to change if you end up being the quote unquote person who is less likely to move abroad, because we're talking about those that actually do and those that don't. So none of this is really about being extroverted or adventurous by nature. It's about small decisions. It's about having grit and a willingness to. Not have all the answers and to still go for it. So in today's episode, we're talking about the difference between the people who move abroad and the people that don't. So that if you maybe find yourself having some of the characteristics of the people who don't typically move abroad, that you can change some of those mindset traits so that you can actually move abroad like you really want to. So with that, we'll go ahead and get started with today's episode. The first couple traits have to do with the dreamers versus the doers. So the first trait is that the doers believe that everything is figureoutable they believe that even though they don't understand all the steps that they need to do, that they can figure everything out, that everything is figureoutable. Dreamers think that they need the full plan before starting, but doers trust themselves to problem solve as they arise. As problems come up, they think, okay, it's okay. Some examples might be visa housing, the job search bureaucracy. You don't need to know everything about everything before you start to move abroad. So that's one trait. That's the difference, is that the doers that actually move abroad believe that everything is figureoutable and they trust themselves to figure out the problems as they arise. They don't need to have the full plan before they start. Dreamers tend to overthink doers take the next step. Movers don't just have a master plan. They just move one step at a time. Micro actions lead to big outcomes over time. Like they start to book a call with maybe a consultants of some sort. They start researching visas. They start joining expat groups. They start to just take it one step at a time and not overthink all the steps. The next couple characteristics of movers and not just the dreamers, are those that have grit, perseverance, and emotional resilience. Movers have grit. That's the third trait. They keep going even when it's hard. Talk about paperwork, frustrations, visa delays, job rejections, and maybe culture shock. Once you move abroad, they have grits to keep going. Movers don't see obstacles as signs to stop. They take it as just parts of the process and they have grit and they keep moving forward no matter what. Trait number four is that they're comfortable not knowing everything. I mean, we've kind of highlighted this I don't know what I don't know, but I'm doing it anyway. Type of mindset. This is the core mindset of every expat. To have this like, I don't know what I don't know, but I'm going after it. Anyways, movers embrace uncertainty instead of fighting it. They also protect the dream as movers. So the fifth trait is that movers ignore the naysayers or they don't share too early to avoid those naysayers convincing them otherwise. Sometimes if you tell people too soon, it can crush your momentum. If it's just the beginning of the start of wanting to move abroad or finally convincing yourself that you're going to do it, maybe you don't know the exact location yet or the exact visa that you need. If you start telling people too soon, sometimes they can bring doubt into your mind. So sometimes the movers ignore those naysayers or they don't share too early. People project their. Fears not your future. So if you have people that are the naysayers or say that you're crazy, or why would you wanna leave the U.S. or it's not safe, or you're throwing away your career, or isn't that irresponsible or don't you love your family, you don't wanna leave them. Those are some examples of common pushback that people might be telling you. But the movers versus the people that are just the dreamers, they ignore those naysayers and they go after it anyways. The sixth straight is that they curate the voices, they listen to movers, intentionally surround themselves with people that are doing similar things or are at least supportive. Dreamers often listen to everyone taking the average opinion of the people that they're talking to, especially the wrong people, if they end up being dreamers and not actually moving. So who are the people that you're listening to? Are they people that you're intentionally surrounding you with that are at least supportive? If not who have done similar things, who have gone after bold dreams in their life? Whether it's moving abroad or not, maybe it's starting a business or something else. That's really scary. So go after those people in your life and have relationships with them, or at least. Tell them the experience that you have. So curate a group of people around you that are going to listen to your dream and are going to be supportive and encourage you to move forward. I also want you to realize that it's not about personality, it's about breaking the pattern. So trait number seven is that movers aren't necessarily extroverted, they're intentional. So you do not need to be outgoing. That does not mean that you're going to be a successful expat whenever you do move abroad to build community. You do need to force yourself to leave your apartment and to pursue friendships with people, but it's not about the personality. There are so many introverts that move abroad. I know many people who are introverts who have moved abroad and they thrive by being resourceful by. Being intentional about building community slowly. So it's really not about being extroverted. The eighth trait is that they're willing to break out of the script. They are willing to take the unconventional path. That's the people who are moving abroad, not the people who are doing the same pattern that everyone else is doing. And staying in their home city that they grew up in. And there is. Nothing wrong with that, please hear me. There is nothing wrong with doing that, with staying close to your friends and family where you are, but if you have this desire to move abroad, I think that we need to listen to that voice. Dreamers often stay because they're following what they've been told their life should look like. Should. I think that whenever you have this dream, that's what keeps a dreamer from a doer is following the pattern that everyone else is doing. But doers are willing to break outta the script of what everyone else is doing and say, I'm gonna do it anyways. So it's really not about personality, it's about breaking the pattern. It doesn't matter if you're extroverted or you're introverted, it's just about being intentional to take the next steps. It's about being willing to break outta the script and say, okay, I know a lot of people in my life are not doing this, but I'm gonna do it anyways. It is also about building a new identity from a maybe one day identity to, I'm doing it now. Identity the ninth trait is that movers identify as the kind of person who takes action. They don't just dream about what they want and think about, they want, they start taking action towards getting it. They start taking action towards getting there. They have an identity shift of I'm moving abroad. I'm the person who's moving abroad, which then shifts their behavior. They repeat, I'm someone who goes after adventure. I'll figure it out. So they're not just thinking like maybe one day they're saying, I'm going after it now the 10th trait is that they trust that the adventure is worth the unknown. They emphasize that movers choose growth over comfort. Our brains are designed to keep us comfortable and what we're used to, but movers choose to grow. They choose to get outta their comfort zone and to go after what they really want. They know that even if the experience is imperfect and it probably will be imperfect, that the story, the new perspectives and the opportunity is going to be worth it. So they trust in the adventure and they trust in knowing that it's worth the unknown. Movers also create evidence for themselves. Dreamers wait to feel ready. Movers create that readiness for themselves. So movers might actively collect little pieces of proof saying, I found an expat group. Maybe this is possible. I'm seeing other people do it, or I just learned the steps for my visa. I see path. I qualify for these. Visa eligibility requirements or I talked to somebody abroad, I reached out to them on LinkedIn and I set up a call and they're no different from me. I can do this too. I've seen them do it. These small wins build that staircase to the big win. They can see that other people have done it and they realize that, they're never gonna feel ready, but they see that other people can do it. And if other people have done it, then absolutely you can too. Dreamers, wait for a surge of confidence, but movers build confidence through action. And by taking small steps, your brain might need to see evidence, you might need to see that other people have moved abroad, that other people have the same job as you abroad, that other people have gotten a visa. Create these tiny wins that will shift your belief to say, okay, that's not, just for other people that are more special than me, it's for me, if they can do it, then I can totally do it. So start creating evidence for yourself. Movers. Also understand that fear doesn't mean stop. Fear is totally normal, but movers might interpret it a little bit differently. Dreamers think that fear equals danger and that it's a bad decision, but movers think that fear equals growth. It's getting outta their comfort zone. It's going to challenge them in a positive way. They understand that the nervous system response is. Of course I'm scared I'm doing something new. They don't try to kill the fear, they just carry it with them and say, I'm gonna go after it anyways. It's not that movers don't get scared. It's that the dream is louder in their heads. They have this desire and they say, I'm gonna go after it anyways. Movers also prioritize the life that they want, not the life that others might expect of them. Movers choose intentional living over defaults living. They might ask themselves, what do I actually want my life to look like? The question that the traditional American might be thinking is, I get married, I buy a house, I work a nine to five job. I wait for retirement to travel. But Dreamers might be stuck saying this because they're afraid to disappoint others, or maybe they're afraid to disappoint themselves. Movers choose the alignment that they know that they want and go after the dreams that they want over approval from others and over what people are normally doing. I think this is a really important distinction that you're not being selfish. If you move abroad, you're not crazy for wanting more. It's not that you are not grateful for the life you have, and you might have an amazing life. You might have amazing friends, an amazing home, a great job that you don't really want to leave behind, but then you still have this nagging knowing that you really want to move abroad. I think you have to prioritize that life that you want. Those are the people that actually move abroad, not the life that other people might be expecting of them. Movers also don't get stuck in research paralysis. Dreamers drown in information. Movers choose a path and they commit and they just move forward and they start taking steps towards it. Movers pick a country, they pick a visa type and a rough timeline, and then they go all in. They just go for it. Dreamers might be scrolling endlessly researching. Every Visa in 40 countries and staying overwhelmed in this constant loop of overwhelm and not making decisions, but movers understand that momentum is going to create imperfect steps forward, but is going to get me to where I'm going and what I really want. A lot of people that want to move abroad tend to overthink everything, overthink visas because it's a new process, something that we're not used to overthink which city is going to be perfect for us and the timeline that we might need, the job that we want. And so many different things. I think that movers just don't get stuck in research paralysis and decision paralysis, but they just start taking little steps forward and just keep moving forward. Movers also build a future identity. I think that this is a really big mind shift that movers make decisions based on the person they want to become, not who they already are. They ask themselves, what would future me do? Would I regret not moving abroad if I didn't do it? Would my future self regret that? What life aligns with my values and life that I want to build? What story do I wanna tell later in my life of what I accomplished and what I've went after? They make choices based on the life that they want to live and the dreams that they have and what they want to accomplish, not the life that they're currently in. So that is a difference between people who move abroad and the people who don't. So as a recap, these are the traits of the Dreamers versus the doers. Those that say they want to move abroad and they actually do it, versus the people who don't. Doers believe that everything is figureoutable. Dreamers, overthink doers. Just take the next step. Movers have grit. They keep going even when it's hard. They're comfortable not knowing everything. Movers ignore the naysayers, or they don't share too early on. They curate the voices that they listen to, and they make sure they have people around them that will support their dreams. Movers aren't necessarily extroverted, they're just intentional about moving forward. They're willing to break out of the script of what is normal in life and what everyone else is doing. Movers identify as the kind of person who takes action. They have this new identity from maybe one day to, I'm just gonna go after it. They trust that the adventure is worth the unknown. Dreamers wait to feel ready, but movers create readiness and they create evidence for themselves. They say that if other people can do it, then I can do it too. Movers understand that fear doesn't mean that they should stop, that there's going to naturally be fear. You're going into the unknown, but movers say, fear is normal. I'm gonna go after it anyway. And I think that's very normal to feel that. Movers, prioritize the life that they want, not the life that others expect. Movers choose intentional living over just whatever is the default. Movers don't get stuck in research paralysis. Dreamers might drown in information and keep doing research, but movers choose a path. And they just commit and they keep moving forward, taking it one step at a time. Movers build a future identity. Movers make decisions based on the person they want to become, not who they've been in the past. The difference is not luck, it's not money. It's not whether you're introverted or extroverted. It's not perfectionism. It's a mindset of gritty and perfect action. It's just saying, I don't understand everything. It's not going to be perfect, but I'm going after it anyways and I'm not stopping until I get there. So I invite you to reflect which of these traits do you feel like you already have and which ones do you really need to build? I think that we can absolutely become the people who move abroad. It's not that you have to say, oh, I'm really identifying. The people who don't move abroad. So that's me. No, like you can change these traits. It's just a bit of a mindset shift. So I think that we can be intentional about having these mindset shifts to say, I'm gonna become the person who moves abroad, not that person who doesn't move abroad. So I hope that you found this episode really helpful. If you are really serious about wanting to move abroad, then I would go download the free guide. The five exact steps to move abroad, you can find the guide at Jordangiberson.com/guide, or you can just click on the link that's in this podcast description and start taking the next steps to be able to move abroad so that you can be that person who moves a rod and not the person who doesn't. So I hope that you found this maybe not harsh, but maybe a bit eyeopening. And I hope that you found it encouraging and I look forward to seeing you here again on the Move Abroad podcast next week, same time, same place. I'll catch you then.