🎪 Episode 80 Parenting, True Crime and Chaos: Suicidal Frogs, Butterfly Fails, Simone Biles Drama & Diddy’s Creepy Courtroom Energy

Hosts: Stefanie Navarro & Meredith Hill
Run Time: 50 Mins

Theme: Domestic Chaos, Sean Diddy Combs Court Case Updates,  Trump VS Must, Crazy animal antics, AITA, Book Club Review! 

Welcome back to This Is My Circus — the podcast where parenting is chaotic, pets are weird, and the true crime tea is scalding hot.

This week, we’re raising butterflies (sort of), rescuing frogs who refuse to stay rescued, fixing toilets like certified DIY queens, and confessing to powdering our boobs in a heatwave. Nothing is off-limits in this household.

We’re also diving into the messiest headlines:

• Simone Biles vs. Riley Gaines: The Olympic icon claps back, but fans aren’t having it — and her old tweets aren’t helping either.
• Diddy’s Trial Gets Weirder: Is he mouthing threats in court? Stephanie Soo says yes, and now she’s had to change hotels eight times.
• Trump vs. Musk: The Twitter breakup you didn’t know you needed.
• Lizard corpses, snake sightings, and... zebra airlifts? Yup. It’s that kind of episode.

🐾 Also this week:

• A dead bird isn’t the only wildlife drama on our porches
• RIP to a pet and the awkward cremation aftermath
• Should you give a dog back to the family that dumped it?
• ADHD hacks for free national park access (no gatekeeping here!)

📚 Book Chat: That’s Not My Name by Megan Lally

We’re OBSESSED. This twisty emotional thriller gave us all the feels — suspense, heartbreak, and ugly crying on the floor. If you love dual POVs, slow-burn reveals, and a book boyfriend who will wreck you emotionally, this one’s for you.

🛑 Spoilers ahead. (And bring tissues.)

Rating: 9.5/10
⭐️ Themes: Identity, survival, trauma, redemption
💔 Side effects: Uncontrollable sobbing, book hangover

🎙️ Segment Highlights:

• “Am I the A-hole?” this week: A woman adopts a dog from a shelter. Then the original owners want it back. Would you give him up?
• Butterfly updates (spoiler: one of them didn’t make it, and the other won’t leave)
• Why powder on the bathroom floor is totally justified
• That time we realized we should’ve been lion cuddlers

🧼 Laundry Detergent Deep Dive:

Tell us your laundry detergent loves. Do the scents actually last? Do we care if we smell like fruity pebbles? The answer may surprise you.

📖 Next Week’s Read: The Unhoneymooners by Christina Lauren

It’s giving fake marriage, tropical chaos, and enemies-to-lovers — aka the beachy palate cleanser we all need after this week’s emotional rollercoaster.

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• FB Group: “This Is My Circus: Chaos & True Crime Community”
• Support the show (or send us fabric softener): [Buy us a coffee]

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Transcript

0:00

Welcome to, this is my circus, the podcast where we embrace the chaos and keep it real about parenting, pop culture, true crime, and the books we can't put down because let's be honest, life is one big circus and we're just trying to survive with caffeine, sarcasm, and a little true crime obsession. So if you love unfiltered conversation, questionable parenting hacks, and deep dives into the things that keep us up at night, you're in the right place. Buckle up, grab your popcorn, and let's get into the chaos. I'm Stephanie. I'm Meredith. And welcome to, this is my circus. Hello, Steph. Ola. Ola. What's up? Oh, living the dream. Living the dream. Yeah. Yeah. I'm the nightmare. Nightmare. Uh, nothing's really going on. It's hot and I'm pissed off about it. Are you? I mean, I enjoy this change of seasons, but I just don't wanna be hot all the time. I have a suicidal frog that keeps trying to get in the pool, and I have saved its life four times, but I'm sick of saving its life at this point, and I think you're just gonna let nature take its course. Yeah. I mean, if it's that dumb, then it's that dumb. Speaking of dumb animals, okay, I did this thing, I always wanted to do this, where you get the live caterpillars and you grow them into butterflies. They turn into butterflies. Okay. So I got, I got five caterpillars. You order'em in the mail and they come and I got the butterfly kit. Okay. They come in a jar, you don't even open it. Okay. And you don't do anything. You don't like food and stuff in there? Yes, everything is in there. You don't even have to open it until they form the crystal list, whatever it's called. That had a fancy word. So I was trying to act like a scientist and then that didn't go well. Anyway, I did the things, it came with five, they grew, whatever. I put'em in this big mesh net thingy that you put'em in so they can hang and grow. So they start emerging. So out of the five, I had four and a half butterflies and one, okay. So three were great, three are gone. One. I had the lid off of this and he couldn't figure out how to get out. And so I like put a plant down in it. So maybe he, he would be like, oh look, no, he was still there when I left today. And so it's been almost 24 hours that he's not figured it out yet. And then one was born, I guess it got, they get caught up in their cocoon type thing. Mm-hmm. So it doesn't have wings on one side of its body. I'm like, what am I gonna do with this guy? I can't let him lose. Do I feed him to the birds that are up here? Like, what, what happens? So Jackson came out last night and he was like, oh mama, your butterflies. You know, he entertains, he, he lets me say all the things. And, I was like, yeah, and I'm gonna let him out right here, but what if those birds swoop down and get'em? And he was like, well that one looks like he needed to be guy talking about the one arm, one armed butterfly, poor thing. I don't know what happened to him. So four and a half out of five is not bad and one is, Challenged, directionally challenged, not ready to fly the co yet, not ready to fly the coop yet. So that was fun though. So even just thinking about what did it take, so, May 28th is when I got the things, so what's that? Two weeks? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And most of the time was the caterpillars growing? Like, they were so small and then they got so large. What gave you this idea? Like, did you see something on TikTok or Facebook? You just searched butterflies? I, yeah. Got no words, you know, I like the garden stuff and I like the outside stuff and I like all that and got it. I'm not judging. I get sucked into things. Like the wipe out and all this stuff that we talked about before. No, I just always like, I, you know, I like working in the yard and working in the garden and all those things, and this is where we differ. This is, this is where we do take different roads in our lives, but I, yeah. So, huh? I'll do it again. Yeah. Mm-hmm. It was really neat. Yeah. Really, when Dylan was little, we would do a lot of sciencey stuff. Yeah. Like at home, like, we'd do like tornadoes in the jocks. Yes. Like all the, the volcano things. Yeah. So like I totally would've done that. Yes. With him when he was little. I, yeah. My brain is like, so not, I wanna do a science project. I get that. I'm like, oh, what can I buy on TikTok? I get that too. I get that too. A hundred percent. I guess'cause of the garden stuff I've been doing a lot outside, so Yeah. So it didn't take long. I successfully raised some butterflies. You know those videos though, where you see somebody save something and then the next second like a hawk swoops down. I kept waiting for that moment. That would be me, my, with your frog, your suicidal frog. Okay. So speaking of suicidal things, so I opened the door yesterday mm-hmm. To go out the front door and I looked down and there is a dead lizard. Did you see it? I told Dylan to move it. I'm like, I, nope, I don't, I didn't see it. There is a dead little green lizard on the doormat. What if I stepped on him? Did I step on him? I don't. No, no. I'll move it when I leave. So every time I walk in I'm like, Dylan, you haven't moved it yet. And he's like, yeah, no, I'll do it when I leave. Oh, I'll have a burial for him. So bury him and sea kind. Just, it was just like belly up on the doormat. He just was done. I thought I was walking Rex two days ago. Yeah. In this big giant, like, those big like vulture birds. Mm-hmm. Buzzards. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Someone like whatever they are, was in the grass. And I'm like, okay, something must have died. Right. And it's, we were walking, so it flew on top of a house, and as I was walking by, it was a huge stead snake. Oh. I was like, no. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm. So I keep, I always look for snakes. Me too. And Oh, okay. Have I told you that Jackson's cutting grass? Yeah. We had this conversation. Okay. So I do the weeding and, and I love it. It, again, this is where we're different. I don't like the manual part of it. It won't kill me, but it's so satisfying. It's like pressure washing something like you, the gratification of seeing it. So the other day I was weed eating for Jackson and I That was a little snake. Was it just like a gardener snake? I don't know. It was little and brown. Mm-hmm. But some, this is stupid, but some black snakes are brown. Yeah. I don't, I don't know. Like the king snakes? Yes. Mm-hmm. And I thought I killed it and I. Told the person that lived there, I was like, uh, just letting you know this is here. Whatever. So I walked back by to do something, I don't know, came back and it was gone and it, was still alive or still like having its reaction things and it was close to the grass. So I like scooted it back out. Give me fallen winter. That's another reason I don't, oh, I, I don't mind the snakes. I don't wanna kill the, the quote Good ones. Like, I don't, yeah. But they're not around when it's cold. Yeah. Mm-hmm. And you know what else isn't around my humid titties? It is way too hot to have a big chest rain now. It's just, Brian was like, why is there powder all over the floor in the bathroom? My business, I was like, I was really hot and I was trying to keep from sweating all over the place. He was like, I get it. You can take that out or leave it in. I really don't care. That's relatable. Absolutely. Absolutely. Oh gosh. Yeah, so it's been great. Fabulous, fabulous. That's, we're only nine minutes in and I've already embarrassed myself a couple of times. Well, it's all good. It is. We're it's family. Yeah. It's just family. We all, uh, we all know what's going on. Yeah. Well, did you see this mess? And I'm so disappointed. Okay. Simone Biles Olympic champion. Yeah. Did you see this mess with her? And, Riley Gaines? I saw like a clip, but didn't go back and watch it. I saw there was something. What's the beef? So Ri Gaines she advocates for no men and women's sports. Mm-hmm. And she's done this for years and years and years. Mm-hmm. And whether you believe it or not, that's right. Whatever. Right. Your prerogative to believe. But she retweeted or re or whatever it all down, I hate it. The photo of the Minnesota High School softball team champions and, all comments were off on this post or whatever Okay. For the school. And she said, of course they won their star player as a boy. Mm-hmm. And it's a female softball team. Okay. Riley did not say, call out which person on the team it is didn't say a specific, position. Mm-hmm. Just said the star player is boy. Okay. And that was it. Okay. There was the only thing she did was call out the governor and said that he is allowing this or he's mm-hmm. You know, weak or whatever. It's the only thing never attacked the child. Just stated the fact. Mm-hmm. So, Simone retweets, Riley's tweet saying Ri truly sick, and she's a sore loser because she lost to a, trans woman, she says that Ri should be using her power to uplift the trans community and make sports inclusive or make a separate category like RI can make a separate category. Mm-hmm. It's Riley's choice. then she says that Riley is bullying this child on this team, and she's a bully and no women are safe in sports with ri around. Oh my gosh. I mean, she went like batty. Yeah. Then out of nowhere, randomly retweets that ri should bully somebody her own size, which would be a man RI is five five and a hundred and thirty five, a hundred forty pounds. I'm sorry that Simone is like four none and little tiny. She's a legit pocket person. Yeah, she's, she's a mini pocket person. So whether you believe the situation or like believe that it's right or wrong, I need to hear, nor there Now you're attacking. Yeah. Some of these looks and not even like accurately. I'm very disappointed in Simon. So am I. Yeah. Everything, um, I've seen is very much in support of Riley. Mm-hmm. If for no other reason than Simone attacking her look. Yeah. So, super disappointed. Everybody is calling out the sponsors for Simone saying like, this is what you're sponsoring. It's like women's athletic wear, you know, all the things because in turn she's bullying and shaming. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And then so Leigh's whole point is not even like, I mean, yes men. Physiologically are different mm-hmm. Than women, their masks. Sure. A hundred percent everything. Yeah. So they do have an advantage. Yes. I think everybody can, for the most part agree mm-hmm. On that. But then to have your locker rooms having to undress mm-hmm. And have that added layer of uncomfortable. Mm-hmm. That's really a, that's a main point of hers is like, girls should not have to change in a locker room mm-hmm. In front of a boy. Yeah. That's still intact. Right, right, right. So, so for Simone to be so, like, this is how it should be when she was so vocal mm-hmm. About the safety of girls in gymnastics after the things that happened to her mm-hmm. Blows my mind. Yeah. And Ri did bring that up in a different tweet, like, hey, like this is what you put out there. Right. And you're truly not advocating for girls. Did she say anything to respond to that? That, you know. Publicity people told her to shut up. Yeah. Yeah. Which is what should happen when they start saying things that just don't make any sense. And I think, I didn't know this, I just saw it today, that I guess she has a documentary coming out, uh, Simone. And so maybe she's just trying to get her name relevant again. Oh. Before the documentary. But this isn't a good look. No, this is not point to it. No, not at all. Mm-hmm. I'm just very, I'm disgusted. Yeah. With, with that. Like, that's not, like you said, men and women are totally different. Mm-hmm. And don't even wanna open this can of worms on here. Okay. So the worst part is somebody dug through all of Simone's tweets and in 2017 she tweeted, thank goodness men aren't in women's gymnastics because they would've taken all the gold. So make it make sense. I, I don't know. It just maybe she got hacked. I don't think so. She doubled down on it. Maybe she got hacked twice. I don't know. I mean, yeah, either way it's, it's, that's bad. Yeah, that's bad. Since you brought up some beef going on, so I saw something the other day that was hilarious about some beef with our president. Oh, I did too. Woke up. It's Friday. Trump and Musk are in a messy breakup dance party with Taylor Swift. Tell me how women are too emotional to lead. Um, well, somebody else had posted, do y'all not see the underlying chess moves that this is making? Because the Democrats, again, we don't normally get into politics, but Right. They were so against releasing the Epstein files. Mm-hmm. So they're saying like, this was all set up and that because Trump is supposedly in there, that they're gonna now demand that files be released. So it was really like a, a tactical move to leak it, saying that he's in these files and to finally get them like fully released. It's all so messy. It's all so blah. Yeah. I don't know. Yeah. It is what it is, right? It is, it is. And right now it's just stupid and all the tweets back and forth and the, the, you're here for it, aren't you? I think it's hysterical. It is funny. It's but terrifying. Like, hey, it could be worse, I guess so. I guess so. It could. Okay. That's not gonna, speaking of worse. Yeah. Did you see our girl, Stephanie Sue is uh, what's going on with her in the Diddy case? No. So I watched her update yesterday and she was there, right? Yeah. And Diddy has like mouthed, like stared her in the eyes and mouthed to her. I know you. Yes. Several times now. It's just once. Well, so she must have done another video.'cause the one I did, she said, I don't know if he's talking to me or somebody else. So it was, she felt it was her. Well, yeah, and then she said, I guess in one of her updates she said that. The, the artist that's do and the artist is horrible like that. Yeah. Court artist. Yeah. Does, oh no, they should not hire her again or him, whoever it is. Right. But, um, she said that the drawings make him look like a koala bear. You can't unsee that once you process that in your head. Yeah. So he was overheard telling the artist to soften him up because he looks like a koala. So, and then like then he's mouthing, I know you. Mm-hmm. And she said that people have been approaching her outside of the courthouse asking her where she's staying. And her and her team have had to move eight times different. Wow. Tells in fear of, of for safety. Yeah. Yeah. Um, but random people never have seen in her life, nothing. Just where are you staying? So. Poor Stephanie Sue is just trying to do the Lord's work She is by giving us all the tea on what's going on. And she takes meticulous notes. She is so good. She is amazing. I thought though, that they couldn't go in for like, the whole time that they just got like a one day thing. I, I don't, I think you have to be like in line, like, and she's gotten in this many times. Mm-hmm. I appreciate her dedication. I do too. And I mean, I don't know where she lives, but she's been in New York this whole time. Yeah, she's, she's doing the thing, she's doing the dang thing. So, um, our poor Stephanie Sue, I pray she stays safe. I know. That's crazy. And then today, um, jury person number six Okay. Is potentially getting kicked off the jury. Why? What happened? Um, I guess overly enthusiastic in favor of Diddy. Like, oh, overly like agreeable to Okay. Inside and showing that. Very expressively. Yeah. In the jury box. Well, apparently there's not supposed to be, and I didn't know this, there's not supposed to be really any expression in the courtroom. Mm-hmm. And that's what our friend Stephanie was saying is that Diddy has been threatened by the judge to be kicked out because he's too expressive. Mm-hmm. Like he was vigorously nodding or something like that. Well, the thing I saw was that he was vigorously nodding to the jury. Mm-hmm. Like staring the jury down. Mm-hmm. And I would be like, Nope, I'm done taking it out. Yeah. I can't do this soulless. No. Mm-hmm. Yeah. So, jury number six today, they were deciding if that person could stay or if they're gonna replace that party. Should I stay or should, man. Can you imagine though, being an alternate and. Like just on standby, just in case. Like, and you have to sit in the, in the room the whole time. Yeah. Like there, it's terrible enough to be sequestered on the jury where you're, you know, isolated. Mm-hmm. But to not even be on the jury. And so you're not making the choices yet, but Yeah. Stinks. So I'm thinking like you're free and clear. Like you don't really have to vote. Right. You get to be there for all the tea Uhhuh, but you don't really have to vote for my choices. Your life isn't in danger. Right. But then now it is. And now it is. All of a sudden, and I've been over here playing Candy Crush and I won't paying attention to everything. I'm sure all of their things are. We talk about that too. I really do pay attention when we record. I do most of the time sometimes. Okay. What was your favorite, one of your favorite things from the past week? That you saw on socials, or I'll tell you mine. Okay. Oh no, I posted it. The The Zebra? No, well that too. Oh, okay. But the Lion Hugger job, that too. Why were we not a mayor? Like, listen, I would be so good. I would too. As a lion cuddler there. There at every career fair I went to, there was never any kind of mammal hugger. No. I should have worked at a zoo. Like I really, I really feel like my life calling was missed a hundred percent. I would've been so good at that job until they got like, throw yuppy. Throw uppy sick. Oh my gosh. So I guess I don't know what started it, but all of a sudden, all of my, okay. I do know what started it, now that I think about it. So, you know, I've talked about baby noodle, that baby alpaca that I'm in love with. Yes. I guess. The algorithm picked up that I'm now an alpaca fan. Okay, fine. They're cute. I'll watch'em And the goats and all the things. Well, the other day I watched an alpaca be born Uhuh. No, I don't wanna watch birthing videos, but now that's like I saw, Nope. An elephant be born. I saw the akka, I saw a couple of pandas get spit out. I want to see the babies once they're clean, fuzzy and, and pretty totally. The baby pandas are like as big as the phone out of a big 600 pound panda. Like, oh, listen, I, I can't do, and then the, the mama picked him up. Like that's all that was. So my algorithm is totally jacked up right now. It's toast. It's toast. But yes. Um, the zebra that was in like the little lefty thing. Oh, but airlifted my listen God, the look on that face was like, and I do it again. A hundred percent. It was all worth it. So if you don't know what we're talking about. First of all, shame on you. Yes. Second of all, there was a zebra in Tennessee that got loose from Chattanooga Zoo. I think so, right? Something like that. And um, or got loose from a zoo and he was on the lamb. We've had a lot of weird animals like loose in the last year, those Jumanji dice again, I'm telling you. But he was like, people were posting sightings of him and they finally captured him and they had him in the net, like was like a helicopter, I guess. And he was just like, oh, the stories I got to tell it looked like a baby in like one of like the ba like the baby carriers, like the hangover baby. It was great. Yeah. But the look, the look on his face was priceless. He regretted nothing. I'm assuming it's a he. Yeah, same. But yeah. I love animal videos. I can Oh, a hundred percent problem. And I love that my algorithm knows that. Yes. Keep it coming. Yeah. You're doing a good job. I don't need to see sad things. No, not at all. But I, okay, so I did see one sad video. Oh, no. Heartwarming. Sad. Okay, so wedding again knows my algorithm, knows my interests. And the sun had passed of the bride and groom, but wasn't organ donor. Donor. And the groom was like, we have a special guest here and we wanna ask whatever his name was to be, our sixth groomsman today. And the bride just bawled. I just got chills. It was amazing. Okay. But then the, the part of me that's like now her makeup for all these pictures Yes. Is ruined. Yes. Oh God. It's like. I know. Well, crying, speaking of crying, I read that book, that you sent me to read that. I was like, don't read it. Read it. Don't read it. Read it. Yeah. Go. Yeah. Crying. Yes, yes, yes. And I like was listening to the, the author Speak after. Yeah. And it, there's two books before that one. I know. I had no idea. Yeah, neither. So, but it was cute, right? It was good. It was so good. But, bawling, I really, I can't remember the name off the top of my head. Everything though. So like that doesn't mean much for anybody listening like I cry. It was very though. Quirky. Yeah. No, I loved it. And I think it would make such a great rom-com movie. Yes. But no bawling, I mean, like Yeah. Yeah. All the things. Yeah. Yeah. Definitely. Yeah, definitely. It was a good one. It was definitely a good one. I think it was that Abby Jimenez or whatever we said. Yeah. Sorry about the tears. It's all good. No, I, I was prepared for it. It was gonna pull the strings, but as I was sitting there listening and like, I don't even know. Vacuuming or doing little thing. Yeah. It was just like tears started coming and I was like, I know, but I cry like once a day, so it's nothing new. Are you dehydrated from all the tears? Oh. It is what it is. Yes. When you vacuum or whatever, does Rex attack it? No. He just, like, of course he doesn't, he sits there and once I get to the spot where he's laying at, he'll look at me, like, do I really need to move? Okay. And he'll get up and like move two feet. Just enough to let you get that spot. Uhhuh. You've seen the videos of the, the dogs like boxer dogs that. Bounce and do that is Louie, a hundred percent when I'm vacuuming and he is just like, stop. So I've gotten to where I'll listen to my whatever, I'll put a headset on and just let him attack me while I'm going. Do you just remember we, oh God. It was like super early in the podcast when Louie was barking and I was like, you are like an ostrich or something. I was, what is that? An ostrich, he still sounds like a Velociraptor sometimes. He is special. Oh my gosh. Okay. So we also talked about losing Dudley Uhhuh and, but did I tell you all of the things going through my mind now that it's a little bit further in the past, I can laugh about it more. Mm-hmm. Okay. So he passed away at the house. We were taking him to the vet so they could cremate him and do the things. Mm-hmm. So Brian and Jackson. Put him in the back of my car. I had a box. And so he was in blankets and they put him in the back of my car. And I had asked him, I was like, okay, do y'all wanna dig this hole for this dog or what? So, they're like, well, whatever. Well, Stephanie was like, you can bring him up here. So took him up there. She works in Fort Mill, and I was doing a wedding right there, like, it was perfectly aligned, but the whole freaking way. I am like, what if he's not really dead? And this dog sits up, I, I'm going to lose it. Like, so thrilled and ecstatic, but at the same time I'm gonna be like, oh my god. You know, you, okay. So then Stephanie brings the, stretcher out and we put the box on there and we're rolling it in when we get him in there. And like his little Paul is over the side of the box and I'm here trying to like, fold him back into the box and like, Steph's like, it's okay. And I was like, why isn't, why isn't he going? And she was like, it's, it's really. Okay. So all that was traumatic enough. Okay. We go into the wedding, we're both basket cases'cause she doesn't feel well and you know, this is going on with me. Well we, we get him back in a lovely box and it has his name like on a metal plate engraved on the front and a beautiful paw print. Like it was amazing. So Stephanie brought him back so I didn't have to go all the way back to Fort Mill to pick him up, which isn't super far, but you know what I mean? Yeah. So she had him at her house. Well I was like, Jackson, will you go and get him? I traumatized this child by going to get. So he brings him back and by the time he brings him back, Brian's home from work and we're there at the house and we're just all kind of hanging out and like, oh, did you open it? Did you look and see? And he is like, no, no, no, mama. I didn't. It's like, and so I open it, of course, and they sent that lovely card. Like, again, we had never had a dog cremated, so it was, it was beautiful. Mm-hmm. But my mom was cremated and I've got her in a little box. Well, sorry, I'm not No, it's, it's great. It's, it's, this is my life. So, I unpack it and I, I'm getting emotional of course, and I'm like, oh, this is, and I said, so we called my mom Nani. I was like, should we put him over there with Nani? Brian goes. Like she's back there on that table, like the table behind the soap, the soaping table. He was like, how long has she been over there? It's like she's, since we've gotten her back, she is been floating around in the living room with us. And so I was like, do we wanna put Dudley over there too? I said I could put him in my office. They were like, put him in your office. Both of them to the corner. I left Naughty in the living room. They could deal with her. He didn't even know she was out there. Oh, well, knows right there in that little canister. Is he? That's sweet. That's a cute one. Yeah. I could not believe. And I'm sure it's just like they say like funeral directors or whatever. Oh yeah. Crazy. The expense business. But when we got Mo, and he was a tiny little, itty bitty thing. Fluffy thing. Yeah. they had different prices for different sized dogs.'Cause when I called, as a basket case, yeah. That day they said, well, you know, how, how much did he weigh? And I was like, 10 pounds. And they're like, okay. Well the price, I think it was like$150 or whatever. Mm-hmm. Well, well first they said, do you want him cremated by himself or do you want it in a group cremation? And I'm like, by himself. I was like, a group cremation. When we picked him up, the. Amount of boxes on the, in the pickup area, Uhhuh that were ready to be picked up had to have been 30 to 40 just sitting there really waiting to be picked up. Yeah, it was crazy. So I was talking to another lady last week and I was telling her all of this, and they had to put their dog down and get'em cremated. It was like$700 locally. And I'm like, that is insane. Oh, and the other thing is, is, and I understand these services cost money. Like they're not, but she's like in there and they're starting the IV and stuff and they're like, we just need to get payment first. And I'm like, I would not be going back. That is not the most sensitive way to handle that. Oh my gosh. Yeah. They don't even, oh. They don't do that in the hospital. No. Yeah. Yeah. But I couldn't believe how many canisters were Yeah. Like piled up. But yeah, it was just, yeah, it was awful. Worst thing ever. Okay. Do you have a, okay, I keep on TikTok, keep getting laundry detergent, like for like this, like different scented laundry detergents. Mm-hmm. But. I'm so apprehensive to buy anything'cause the scents don't last. Mm-hmm. Like when you take them outta the dryer, like they smell great going that Yeah. Like yeah. When you're pouring in the detergent. Yeah. So have you gotten any that actually last? So I have tried to, okay. It's one of my favorite smells in the world is like clean clothes. Okay. And I'm not talking like being on the line outside. I'm talking, I want all the chemicals in like Yeah. The smell. Yeah. And that's what I want, but I can't find anything at that. So Jackson had spent the night at a basketball tournament with Peyton and he played basketball in this shirt, two or three games. He came home and it still smelled like fabric stuff, but Good. Okay. And I was like, Mia, what did you use? And she, she sent me the picture. I was like, that's what I use. But I have been diluting mine. Okay. But it's the arm and hammer with oxyclean, all that kind of stuff. Okay. but I also like gain. Mm-hmm. But I don't use any softener. I use some sheets. Yeah. And then I'll sometimes use the Lysol stuff in with the wash. Yeah. Have you ever tried that? That's really good with stinky stuff. But I think I need something else.'cause I want that clean clothes smell. Yeah. I want it. Do you softener? Just the sheets and make Yeah. I think we need to do the softener. Yeah. Well, and again, on TikTok it's like, oh, this like cotton candy scent and this scent and those speeches and cream and the strawberry. Okay. Whatever. See Yeah. But I don't want all of those. Right. And give me all of this. All the you. You'll take'em. I'll take all of'em. I like the, just the fresh clean. Mm-hmm. I want like the, the fruity, like you're okay with that? I love it. Okay. I wanna smell like fruity pebbles. That would actually smell good. I know. That would smell good. so half of the comments are like, oh my god, best detergent ever. And then like, the other half are like, it. You can't even smell it when it gets outta the dryer. So then you don't know which is real. Right. I wonder if it, do you have the front load washer or a top top? I wonder if that stuff makes a difference. Yeah. I dunno. But I want all the smelly, like all the smelly things. Yes. Yeah. Oh, I think I need to get some of the, I'm gonna stop diluting so much. And, I'm gonna start using some fabric softener, not just the sheets. Mm-hmm. I use those sheets though, that are like, they're supposed to help with pet. Mm-hmm. Fur, pet fur. Is that the right word? Dander? I don't know. Yeah, I dunno. Because that mine shed so bad. Yeah. Not me. I don't shed, I do this shit. These don't, she the speed sheds terribly. Yeah. So those dryer sheets are supposed to, I don't know if they help accumulate or repel or my sister, he must said repent, repel. Not, my sister gave me this like, rubbery thing to, it's supposed to. Does it work? I've only used it once and I don't know, I forget to put it in. Yeah. I'm terrible. Do you separate your laundry? No, it all goes, the only thing I separate is like underwear. Well, I separate like the towels and sheets, like those are towels and sheets are one thing. Yeah. Um, clothes are something else. Yeah. And well, and Dylan and I do separate laundry because Yeah. His stuff is. Like it's boy stuff. It's boy stuff. It's gross. Yeah. I do all of our laundry together and I'm like, no, no. I can now be separate. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, we talked about home projects and how I should not be doing these things, but the toilet was leaking, like the, like, just like dripping water. Okay. Like inside the bowl. Yeah. And so I go onto YouTube and like mm-hmm. I have to change the little flappy thing.'cause the flappy thing was you fixed the flappy. I did all by myself. I'm so proud of you for fixing the flat fee. I was in the store and I bought one and I fixed it all by myself. I'm proud of you. I know. I'm very proud. Look at you all grown up. I was like, I'm so proud of myself. Oh no. That's awesome. Oh,, oh. So I was scrolling Obviously, and I saw that. For all of us. A DHD peeps. Mm-hmm. Technically a disability if we didn't know that already. Right. And, you can get a lifetime all access pass to all the national parks for free, and it includes up to three guests with you. I didn't know this. I, and I'm so excited about it. You have to have your doctor write a note on letterhead, saying that you have a DH adhd. Okay. With their signature at the bottom. Mm-hmm. And when you apply for it, the pass mm-hmm. That's all you need is documentation from your provider that you Yeah. Look at that. And it's a lifetime all access pass. Plus you get like discounts to the stores or whatever. Mm-hmm. Very cool. So you get to bring three people for free. Yeah. That's so awesome. And it's for everywhere. Yeah. Countrywide. Mm-hmm. State and national parks. That's good to know. I know when Jackson was in fourth grade, somehow there was this thing for fourth graders for that year that they could get into any national park for free and bring X amount of people. And we already had a trip planned to go to Virginia. Mm-hmm. And we went to a lot of national parks that year and we did like Williamsburg and you know Yeah. Different things. But it was really cool to have that. So I'm glad you said that. Yeah. I need to get that. So for all my people, even if you, it's not a DH adhd, if you have any kind of disability that's document behavioral, the behavioral health kind of thing. It just said disability, so. Oh, okay. Yeah, I'm sure you can probably sway it that way. Yeah. But yeah, you can apply for a. Lifetime. I'll access that. That's really cool. That's really cool. So there you go. There. Good to know. My know my a DH ADHD tip for the day. Own it. Own it and use it. Why not? so we are ready for, am I the A-hole? Okie, do, am I the a-hole for refusing to return a dog that I adopted to his original owner. Hmm. I'm already gonna have complex feelings, I think. Okay. Did you read it? Uhuh? Okay. I just saw the. Title, title, about a little over a year ago, I went through probably the worst time in my adult life. I was engaged and found out my fiance was cheating on me. I was living in a condo he owned, and even though he wanted to try to make things work, I couldn't do it, so I left and moved home temporarily. Moving home at 32 wasn't in my plans, and it all took a toll on me mentally and emotionally. I was sad, embarrassed, and my mental health wasn't good. Fortunately, I have supportive parents, an awesome job that let me take Aleve and got my mental health back to at least stable for quite a while. Eating and sleeping were a major struggle, and finding motivation wasn't great. After a lot of therapy and tough work, I started to feel somewhat human again, but still very much sad. I found an apartment and I had been considering adopting a pet. I talked it over with my therapist and she told me she thought it would be very good and I should look into it. I went to a local rescue thinking I would find a puppy I could raise and care for what I didn't expect. They always find us on. What I didn't expect was finding an older dog who was seven who'd been given up when his owners were expecting a child. That pisses me off. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. He was so sad and honestly a bigger breed than I was thinking of, but I grew up with dogs. The woman at the rescue told me a, his backstory and his owner had him prior to getting married, and the wife wanted the dog gone because she felt he wouldn't be safe around her baby. He had no history of aggression and just seemed timid and depressed. I instantly connected with this dog. We went for a walk and I knew I would be taking him home with me. That was almost 10 months ago, honestly. I have to say we've made each other's lives dramatically better. I cook for him. We watch movies. He's amazing. He's a great motivation for me to get out and walk every day. I have human friends, of course, but this dog is my bestie and I can't imagine not having him. I get it. Same. I get it. This brings us to the issue at hand. Apparently the people who surrendered him realized the wife forcing the dog out is now a mistake. They've contacted the rescue who in turn have contacted me. I was absolutely floored that they would even ask me if I was willing to speak. I. With his ex family. Apparently there's something where I guess pregnant women become fearful or whatever with animals. The husband never wanted to give the dog up, but it was an ultimatum the wife gave. I told them there was no way I'd be willing to traumatize my dog or giving back to people who just tossed them away. I feel the fact that they were even asking this upset me because animals aren't just something you toss away or whatever and then get to change your mind. I asked them not to contact me again and block the rescue on social media because I was afraid his old owner would find me there. I I can't imagine being pressured to give up someone like a dog you've had for years, but feel like that isn't my problem. Losing him would be horrible for both of us. I feel like we found each other for a reason. Am I being selfish? Am in the right here. Okay. There's an update. Let's pause. No, no. No, they were just gonna l they just let that dog lit however long he was in the shelter. Sad, depressed. No, you keep that baby. Yes. Update. I just wanna thank most of the people who've commented. It made me feel a lot more justified in my feelings and how I reacted. I appreciate your feedback. So this was such a big fear of mine with Rex. Okay. That somehow the owner, like his previous owner, yeah. Dumped him, would try to get him back. And when I initially done like the seven day whatever mm-hmm. Hold that they do. When I had called animal control, they had said, you just have to keep them blah, blah, blah for seven days. And if somebody tries to contact us, you know, they would. Reunite him with the owner. Mm-hmm. So that passed, I call back and they're like, well, we never sent anybody down there so that seven day hold hasn't started yet. And I'm like, no, no, no. That's not my fault. You didn't come down. And like, they're like you, what you did was, I mean, like, they were awful. Oh, like what you did was illegal holding him like that. And I was like, no, I called and nobody came down. There was no room in the shelters and mm-hmm. This is what you told me to do. Mm-hmm. Like, that's not right. And so I was so scared that somebody was gonna try to claim him then.'cause I had become so attached to him at that point. Mm-hmm. He's already had his surgery. Like, I mean, we're like all in. Right, right. And I was like, oh my gosh. I was petrified of this situation happening. Mm-hmm. Did you think about like dying his hair and stuff? I, I was like, maybe we shouldn't post anything on social media. I had posted in the groups like, you know, this is not belong to anybody. Like trying to find his owner at first. Mm-hmm. Um, even when he was loose, just trying to take pictures from afar.'cause he wouldn't Right. Let anybody get near him. Yeah. I remember seeing the pictures you had posted and stuff, and he was just. But I didn't realize how big he was. Okay, so the first time I had, I kept printed treats with me. Mm-hmm. Oh yeah. And so he finally came up to me and I'm like, oh God, you are. And I'm sitting on the floor. I was sitting on the ground and he comes up and I'm like, oh, you're big. was used to Mo who was head. Yeah. So this was like, holy smokes, you are huge. You're a big guy. And you know that social media guy like that says white woman ain't scared of shit. Yeah. That was me. Like, I was just like, oh, you just, you just want some love. You're just so baby. I got a video of it because I was like taking a video. I was like, you just want some love. Oh, I'll see the video. I'll show it to you. Okay. But no, she is not the A-hole. No, definitely not. This was my biggest fear. Yeah. With adopting a dog. Yeah. They need to go kick rocks. Keep that baby. Yeah. The baby was sent to you from somebody up above. Yep. Okay. Time for our non bookies to head out. Yep. We love you. Love you. Thank you. Back. Bye. Okay. Bookies. Bookies. We read a good book. Yes. That's not my name by Megan Lolly. A bruised a Amnesia teen is claimed by a man who says he's her father while elsewhere. a boyfriend becomes a prime suspect in his girlfriend's disappearance to lives spiraling into mystery, danger and deception. So I loved this book, loved this book. I loved it. I had read it before when I was trying to catch up on our list. I told you. Mm-hmm. Even it just as good the second time. Yeah. I, I loved this. I listened to it all in one day. Mm-hmm. It's not super long. It's like nine hours Yeah. To listen to it. It's not like one of our big old marathons, but I couldn't stop listening to it. Uhhuh. It's told from two different points of views. Mm-hmm. You got Mary, who is the quote unquote daughter. Mm-hmm. And then you have Drew, who is the boyfriend of the Missing girl. Mm-hmm. So. Again, I'm a crier. Mm-hmm. And this book at the end, oh yeah. The last 30 minutes had me bawling, like ugly cry. Of course boilers obviously. Lots happened at the end of this book. Yes, yes. And lots of emotions at the end of this book and also throughout with the freaking sheriff this book, like the End, crushed my Soul. I was so mad. I, it was not what I expected. No. And I wasn't even mad. Like it was just like heartbreaking for me. And again, I cry so easily, take that with a grain of salt, but all of the feels, all of the emotions. So which part really got you when he, I. Rescued her. Well, so when he found out that it wasn't his girlfriend mm-hmm. That is missing. Right. But he still fought to save this girl. Yeah. And then when he's on the dock or wherever he was mm-hmm. With a cupcake for her, did you say cupcake? Cupcake, yeah. Bawling. I mean, and when, and then the girl that he rescued came. Yeah. And Oh God, I, I know it was, it was all of the tears. This author, I can't remember who it was. Megan Lolly. Megan Lolly. She does a really good job at e getting emotion from you through the whole book. Mm-hmm. Just the, like, the point when they climbed up the, and through the window of his room, you're angry, you're happy, you're excited, you're sad. She does really good at pulling all those emotions out of you. Yeah. Mm-hmm. And makes you feel that you're there in that moment with them. Yeah. I really enjoyed her per this perspective. I also. Loved the comedic relief. Yeah. From the cousin Max. Max. Yeah. It was great. Was a little bit of like, it just like lifted it up a little bit. Yeah. Like a little, so it wasn't all completely just dark and scary. Yeah. It was just a, you know, a goofball eating fries. Yes. Yeah. So that, that was a good, uh, yes. Saving grace on that. But the buildup of this story and like the, the suspense of under the disappointment, oh, I know all the feels. I was so devastated at the end when Yeah. With it not being Lola. Um, I mean, I'm glad that there was another girl rescued, but just the fact that, that it wasn't her. Mm-hmm. And then at the end, this is probably the talker, the part you were talking about with the cupcake and the celebration. The, what's her birthday? It was her birthday. Lower birthday. Um, yeah. And he, they got a cupcake every year together. Mm-hmm. And so he still went and got the cupcake and brought it to their spot. Oh. that part when he, when, when, uh, I forgot what her name is. Is it Sophie? No, I don't remember. But the girl that he did rescue mm-hmm. Said, um, you know, she was dead within X amount. You couldn't have done anything. And just the relief that he felt,'cause he thought, you know what, if she'd been alive all this time and I would've found her sooner and all the things. Yeah. Ugh. But this book was phenomenal. I absolutely loved it. Yeah. Um, again, ugly crying at the end for me. Mm-hmm. It was good. Did you see the twist coming at the end where it was not, Lola, I had like a suspicion, in the beginning, maybe like how are they gonna, screw with your head? Yeah. I go into a book with that. Yeah. Might find where the, where the twists are. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Agreed. And you could tell that something was off, but you think it's because she's had this amnesia thing, like, she's wanting to wear all black, but that's her coat. Like, I don't get all, you know, I don't get all the things. So yeah. How are they gonna make me regret reading this book? I mean, not that, I figured it out, but I was looking for all, all the little pieces. Yeah. And I'm picking up on things that weren't Right, right. Or looked off. But like you said, then you're like, well, is it just the amnesia? Right. Even if they find her, is she gonna be be different. Yeah. Yeah. So, that aspect, I didn't necessarily find the twist, but I was, yeah. Digging. Yeah. For it. Yeah. But I think I was just so devastated. A nine. It was good though. What would you give it? Nine. Nine. Absolutely. Nine and a half. Yeah. I really, really liked it. Agreed. Although, like the ugly crying, I was not needed. But, uh, again, we liked the unpredictable I do. And the fact that it wasn't Lola, it was. As somebody else, and that she was dead. Yeah. And it was just different, I think a different storyline Yes. Than, than your typical Yeah. Who done it Yeah. Type of thing. And it had a, like you said, a little bit of comedy, a little bit of, it was even a little cute little, some flirting in there, whatever. Not too much, but enough to kind of give it some levity. So I felt so bad for Drew though. Yeah. The whole town turned on him thinking everybody, the girlfriend, um, Lola. And then I just felt so bad. I mean, I know. And then the guilt that he had. Yeah. Because he had the fight and, and she got outta the car and that's when she disappeared. Right. So between the guilt and then all the accusations, that's enough to, that's a lot. That's a lot for anybody. And then for a kid, yeah. So I, as a mom, yeah, it's like putting, like mm-hmm. You try to like, imagine it in real life and I'm like, oh my god. Right. I couldn't even imagine. I know, it's cra it was crazy. It was a crazy book. So, totally recommend it. Absolutely. Absolutely. I was kind of like hmm. At the end with the, but I'm glad that those kiddos were like Scooby-Doo and they saw the mystery True. Jumping out of the the sheriff's window. Yeah. Yeah. It was great though. I definitely liked it. Would read more by her. Definitely. And that was her debut book, was it really? Yeah. I didn't know that, but she did, she did such a great job. Yeah. Great job. Oh my gosh. Great job. I think the un Honeymooners is next. Yes. I am on a wait list. I'm next on the wait list. Okay. Then I'm after you because I just saved it. Um, and that's so The Un Honeymooners by Christina Lauren. Olive is, I like that name. Olive. It's like a, oh, I told my niece the other day, when you have a daughter, can you name her Olive? I love that. And she is not even engaged. Okay. She's not pregnant, she's not e. Even in that mental that I was like, I love that name. Okay, back to you. Olive is always unlucky in her career, in love and well everything. Her identical twin sister, AMI, on the other hand, is probably the luckiest person in the world. Her meet cute with her fiance is something out of a romantic comedy gag, and she is managed to finance her entire wedding by winning a series of internet contest. Double gag. Worst of all, she's forcing Olive to spend the day with her sworn enemy, Ethan, who just happens to be the best man. Olive braces herself to get through 24 hours of wedding hell before she can return to her comfortable unlucky life. But when the entire wedding party gets food poisoning from eating bad shellfish, oh, the only people who aren't affected are Olive and Ethan. And now there's an all expense paid honeymoon to Hawaii up for grabs. Putting their mutual hatred aside for the sake of a pre vacation. Olive and Ethan Head for Paradise determined to avoid each other at all costs. But when Olive runs into her future boss, the little white lie she tells him is suddenly at risk to become a whole lot bigger. She and Ethan now have to pretend to be loving newlyweds, and her luck seems worse than ever. But the weird thing is that she doesn't mind playing, pretend. In fact, she feels kind of lucky. So that is very different from what we just read and I It's seems like a palate cleanser it. Yeah, it really does. So I'm actually number three in line on Hoopla and on Libby, that's about a seven week wait. Oh geez. So I might get the, I might borrow the real book. Oh, okay. And, read, read, oh, this one's available. What's available in Espanol? Should I try that? Should I give that a go? No. No. So that's our next book. So I am looking forward to a palate clean after all of my tears. Awesome. Absolutely. It'll be good. Yeah, it'll be good. All right. Well thank you guys so much for listening. Um, come back next week for all sorts of chaos. Thank y'all. We love you. Love you. Bye bye. All sorts of chaos. Yeah, I'm just throwing it out there now. Alright, that wraps up another episode of, this is My Circus. If you survive this episode and somehow still like us, make sure to subscribe, leave a review, share it with your friends, or just send us caffeine. And don't forget, you can join our VIP circus crew for the full video version of each episode. Also exclusive bonus content, access to merch, and so much more Until next time, keep the drink strong. The book's coming, and the kids only mildly Ferrell because this is our circus and these are our monkeys. Love ya.