The Inside Scoop Mom & Me
Developing and Fostering a Strong Mother and Daughter relationship by discussing those hard topics: Communication, Boundaries, Spirituality, Relationships, Health & Wellness and etc.
The Inside Scoop Mom & Me
The Seasons That Shape Us (Part 3): The Growth in Progress
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
Hey y’all! 💕 Tune into our newest episode - Part 3 of our series “The Seasons That Shape Us."
This is the final part, where we’re talking about where we are now… and honestly, we’re still becoming. 🤍
We haven’t arrived. We’re still growing, still learning, still navigating what God is doing in this season.
In this episode, we’re getting real about:
- What life looks like after the change and the refinement
- Being in a place of growth while still in progress
- Letting go of the pressure to have it all figured out
- Trusting God in the “in-between”
This is for the one who feels like they should be further along… but is realizing that growth takes time. 💗
We’re not where we used to be, but we’re also not done yet. ❤️🔥
Tune in, you don’t want to miss this!!! 🎙️🎙️
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/momandmescoop/
Email: momandmescoop@gmail.com
I'm Deja Monet. And I'm Athena Jay.
SPEAKER_01We are a mom and daughter duo who's been through the trying and challenging preteen and teen years, identity issues, fear, guilt, shame, not knowing who we are or whose we are, but God. We now have a godly, strong, healthy mother and daughter relationship. So this is the Inside Scoop with Mom and Me. Hey y'all. Welcome back. We are so excited to be back, y'all.
SPEAKER_00Yes, we are back live with you, coming to you for part three of our series.
SPEAKER_01The seasons that shape us. We are so excited.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, but before we get started, let's kick it off with gratitude. Yes. I am so grateful for just another day. I'm grateful to be in my right mind, and I'm grateful to be here with you guys.
SPEAKER_01Yes, and I am just so grateful as well, just to, you know, be woken up in my right mind that everything is functioning properly. And yeah, I'm just elated. And this is the day the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it.
SPEAKER_00Amen. Yes. Yes. So, y'all, y'all, if you have been joining us today, we are going to get into where we are today. Yes. Right? Y'all. So y'all know this has been a journey for us. Um, and if you've seen our previous two episodes, you know, we talked about what was that change, right? Right. And I was filled with so much shame. Right. Guilt. And it became that I was always angry. Um, and today I could say I'm less angry. Praise the Lord. You know, I don't respond in that way that of an anger or coming that out of a defensive mode, or being that one that's kind of saying I'm taking everything defensively and trying to always respond. So I will say today, I respond totally different. Praise God.
SPEAKER_01Yes, Dizzy. Y'all knew my mom, okay. She used to turn up.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. You know, I did turn up. Um, and it was because, you know, of all the guilt and the shame. And I knew I needed to change, and I'm so grateful for where I am today. Exactly. You know, have I arrived? No. No. You know, it's still a work in progress. But that's the beauty of it, I think, on any journey that you're taking. Um, you know, it's just a wonderful journey. Exactly. And I needed those things in order to make the change, which I am so grateful and blessed, beyond blessed, that all those things, all those seasons had to happen. And and if you're like me, and you know, I don't know where you're at in your your journey or what that looks like for you, but I knew something deep down had to change. Right. And it needed to change immediately because I didn't like that person who I was becoming or who I was.
SPEAKER_01Exactly.
SPEAKER_00You know? Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and I honestly would say the same thing too. Like, I feel like it just comes to a moment where you just realize, okay, like something has to shift, something has to change. And I feel like the um the first step is just number one, just recognizing that something has to change. So that's kind of like what we talked about in episode one, and then episode two, we kind of talked about like the shift, the refining moment. Um, and kind of like, okay, where how do we navigate kind of like that change? How do we navigate that shift? And now we're just gonna be discussing, like, okay, this is where we're at today, and all the things that we had to go through to where we are today, you know.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, but you know, one of the things I We didn't have to go through it again. I didn't mean to say that. No, but the things because circumstances are always gonna come. Yeah, I I think that you know, it's the response and how we respond to it is the difference.
SPEAKER_01Exactly.
SPEAKER_00Um, and instead of responding into defense mode that I was always in, always on defense, today I kind of take a step back before I respond. Um, I kind of think about how to respond and who I'm responding to. Exactly. Right. Because you have to know who you're talking to, how they handle things, you know, just to kind of be able to meet people where they are. Um, and in my response, I try to bring something and I try to do it out of love. Absolutely.
SPEAKER_01And I feel like there's definitely a difference between when you respond out of anger versus love, or just like when you're, like you said, on defense mode rather than you're just responding out of love. So I definitely agree with that.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, but you know, it is y'all, when we talk about this journey, you know, and when it started to where we are today, and how it's still continuously, we have to continuously every day renew our mind. Absolutely, right? Because, you know, anger can take a control, and then it becomes worry, then you're kind of fearful, then you get into doubt. Right. And then you just don't know what to do. Exactly. Um, and so I know I've been there. Um, and why we do these episodes and why we kind of do the series is because we want to ensure we walk these steps out. Exactly. Um and the journey may be different for you, but what we had to recognize is that how I respond today, I have when I tell you, y'all do not understand, um, because I did always kind of I was snappy all the time and had an attitude and sassy. You know, they would call me sassy, that's what it was. Um, and now I'm like, wow, people could say something or things can happen around me. I am totally like, do I need to respond that way? Or can I just take a step back and think about it? You know, what do you think, Dej?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, honestly, well, I was just gonna hit on like how you used to respond. Um, I think one thing that, you know, that's definitely where you're at today and how you've changed, I think now you're a lot more sure of yourself. And as far as like you mean what you say. Yeah. You know what I mean? And you're very like your yeses are yeses and your no's are no's. Yeah. And you stand by it and you stand on it. And I feel like, no, you're not like quote unquote direct, but you are. But you know, you know, like you said, you what you work on your response and who you just who you're talking to. And I think that you've done an excellent job at that and being more direct. Thank you. And like, okay, listen, this is how I feel.
SPEAKER_00You know what I mean? Yeah, I you know, I do. Um, but it's not kind of mean. No. And it's not that I'm hurtful, but it means that I'm sure. You're right. I'm very sure, and you're right. My yeses are yeses, and your nose are. My nose are no's. But you know, I want to touch on one point with you. Um, as you watch your child or whomever you're around, how they grow and develop. Um, and you know, like Deja mentioned before, she was that one that, you know, she was like a people pleaser. Oh. She didn't know how to let go of things. She would hold tight to things. Um, and her attitude, y'all, let me share one good thing. Deja had an attitude.
SPEAKER_01Can you believe Deja right here? I know. I feel like I tell people this all the time and they're like, what? Like, I can't even. Well, sometimes they're like, I could kind of imagine. But other times they're like, What? No way, you, Deja?
SPEAKER_00And I'm like, Yeah. She did have an attitude. And you know, let me tell you, back in, you know, when I was growing up, right, and I had an attitude problem. Now, let's get that all the way clear. Right. I had the attitude that will just come at you. My mom said to me one time, she was like, you know what? Payback. I said, Oh, payback. And when I had Deja, she said, mm, mm-hmm, watch. Just watch. I said, Well, mom, whatever. I got this under control. But ooh, she did give me a run for my money. Um, but I do remember one of the situations, y'all. This was Deja got her first job. Oh my gosh. Yes. And that was when she was about 17. Yep. Um, and she got her job at McDonald's, y'all. You know McDonald's. Everybody starts at McDonald's. I was at Wendy's. I love that job. But anywho, she was at McDonald's working. And I remember one day, you know, because she would go in there like.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, like, y'all, my attitude would be so just horrible. Like, and it's not, yeah, like, I don't even know. I feel like at the time, I didn't realize. Yeah. But like, you know, high side 2020. I'm like, girl, like, why didn't you just get yourself together? Like, you just over here, your face is all turned up and it's not cute. It was, it was. Uh pivot for a second. And like I see other young people, like, you know, who are, you know, in their teens or early 20s, and I'm just like, oh my gosh, like if you only knew like how you just appear as far as to like, you know, to your um customers and stuff like that. I'm just like, man, I just wish they would see how we see them. You know what I mean?
SPEAKER_00But you know what the thing of it is though, you know, people don't see their own reflection sometime, right? Because sometimes, you know, how you show up to work. I don't care what it is, what you're doing. And yes, we don't like who they like to work sometime, and then you're doing it at a fast food restaurant. But whatever that start looks like, you start somewhere and you go in there with a great attitude, right? Because you're doing customer service. Well, just being kind, yeah. Kind. Well, listen, Deja calls me at work. I'll never forget. And she said, Mom, you know, the manager called me into the And y'all, this was on my day off. On her day off, she calls you. She's like, Mom, I wonder why they call me.
SPEAKER_01Okay, yeah, so I because so me and my dad and mom, and like we have like a group chat. And I was like, Y'all got a sex. So I called them both, and I was like, Y'all, my manager just reached out to me. And like I said, I was off of work and it was like during the summertime. And I said, My manager just reached out to me and said, like, come to whatever uh McDonald's, whatever, when you have the chance, you know, let's just chat. And I said, What do you guys think that means? I remember I would never forget. My dad was like, Oh, you can't fire. I said, No way, like, why? Like, what do you mean? Y'all, I went to McDonald's fired on my day off.
SPEAKER_00Fired. Now, who gets fired on their day off? Because of it. Who gets fired from McDonald's? And why? Her attitude, yes.
SPEAKER_01That's what they told me. She were like, you know, your um your whole like demeanor, the way that you speak to the customers, just everything's just kind of rude. Not rude, they did not say that, but just like you're not friendly. You know what I mean?
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01And I was like, Dag. But you know, I was still kind of young or whatever, so I went on to my next job. Oh, gosh.
SPEAKER_00I worked at um Well, we won't say, Yeah, but you know, she worked at her next job. And this is an and one thing I'm gonna say, Deja got good jobs. And as a young person, you know, back when we was growing up, these jobs were not like they are today. And I was like, oh, girl, you got you a good, nice little job in the world. Paid pretty good, and you just had to just show up. And I told her, I said, when you get to this job, you know, make sure that you're just smiling, that you're talking, that you're just doing all of these things, right? So Deja was like, okay, mom, okay, mom, you know, I got it, I got it.
SPEAKER_01Yes. And so yeah, got my job there, and I'm like, okay, mom and dad both give me a pep talk. Okay, fix my attitude. I'm like, okay, cool. When I first started, I was all cool. But I thought I was doing good, you know. But then I will never forget. I had came in for my shift. It was like at 9 a.m. Wow. Wow. The manager, hey Deja, can I speak to you for a second?
SPEAKER_00And you know, when you do, now here's the thing. You know what's on the other side. When they come, your manager early in the morning, first of all, to can I talk to you for a minute? You like, what did your heart do?
SPEAKER_01Drop. Drop. But see, I wasn't really nervous because to be honest, like, I really wasn't expecting that. Like, you know what I mean? I had only been at this job for six months. Like, anyway, so she had, okay, Deja, come here for a sec, you know, let's have a talk or whatever. I seen a paper in front of her, uh, in front of her, and it said, terminated.
SPEAKER_00Wow.
SPEAKER_01Terminated, y'all. I got fired again. Again. For the same thing. My attitude. Yeah. So I'm like, okay, this isn't me problem. It's a because you know, we all want to get, like mom said earlier, like we won't all want to get defensive and we do, you know, be all like rah-rah, woo-hoo, like whatever the case may be. But no. Mm-mm. And so that's me.
SPEAKER_00It's me, I'm the problem. It was the problem, right? But then you, of course, continue because you're like, oh, those were just my jobs. I mean, you know, that was in high school, and you know, you continuously go about this, but then, you know, as she spoke, she was a people pleaser, she was an attitude problem. But when I see her today, um, I and I and we was just talking about this. It was like, I said to her, you know, there is three words that I would describe for you, maybe four, I think it was. Yeah. Um, and when I look back six years ago when these things were transpiring, her attitude was on 10. She was getting fired, and I couldn't understand. I'm like, Yeah, why can't she just get it together? Yeah. There is nothing wrong. But fast forward to today. Um, when you look at her, and I said, here's three words that I would describe of you loving. Period. I said that she's, you know, fun to be around. You know, just a fun person. I mean, I'm not just saying this because she's my daughter, right? But what I'm saying is I'm grateful for the change and where she came from. And then the third one was what was that third one I said to you, Daige? I said, loving, fun, and chill. She's very chill. She's wondering.
SPEAKER_01No, but y'all guess what else she called me?
SPEAKER_00Dramatic. No, she is dramatic. I am dramatic. Um, but you know, she is dramatic, right? Yeah, which is cool. Okay. Which is cool, but she's chill.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Um, and so why I say that chill piece is because you can tell that she's spending time now with God. Um, and when you see someone spending time with God from where they came from to where they are today, it's more of a peace that comes about her. It's now that she is knowing who she is. Now, we're not gonna say that we have arrived. But have we all? But no, and and that's the beauty of this whole thing, right? I said that everyone's journey, and I'm kind of looking at it from yes, I'm inside, right? I see it, but I see the change and I see where you are today, but I can also see all the things in the in between that took you or where you've been to get to where you are today. So, what I say to others and moms or whomever you are, and can change happen for sure. 100% for sure, but it took time, it took being intentional, yeah, it takes that, right? Because when you look at yourself in the mirror, you're like, oh my gosh, I need this change.
SPEAKER_01Exactly. And I think that's really good too. And like you said, so yeah, all that to say, like, you know, the story with me getting fired to where I am today, and thank you, mom, for that compliment. Really appreciate it. Um, I just think, you know, it's always a work in progress. It's always. And I I haven't arrived. Me personally, like where I'm at today, I just feel sometimes like I'm still working. Like, like me and mom mentioned, I think we went through I think we mentioned like we went through freedom in 2022. And it felt like at that time, like we had arrived, like all was well, like we are good, all is good. You know what I mean? I mean, fast forward to 2025, that year was really traumatic, like you know, for our family. So it kind of seems like like a like not that we took a step back, but just like it kind of just feels like an a bump in the road. And it just feels like, okay, like now you have to reshift. And I feel like sometimes some seasons are meant to kind of just stretch you, stretch your faith in different ways. Yeah. Because like for me, like I got really comfortable, really complacent, like just in my relationship with the Lord, just like, okay, well, everything's good. And I feel like some things just kind of like not had to happen, I don't like to say that, but some things happens to shake it up again. Yeah, shake it up again. I feel like now it's kind of reignited something back in me to be like, okay, Lord. Yeah, that fire back. But okay, Lord, I gotta get into the word. I have to, you know, fight down these um strongholds that are in my mind. Like these thoughts are crazy. Like I said, I thought I was coasting, like, oh yes, I was good. I had peas, I wasn't people pleasing. But you know what?
SPEAKER_00Let let me like that. But I let me bring something out. You brought up one good point right there. You hit it. What happens is we get comfortable. Right. Right? When a season has overcome, you've prayed over it, you're like, ooh, yeah, y'all, I have arrived, I am doing good, so I don't need to be in it as much. Exactly. Right? You don't need to be in that word, or you know, you can back up a little bit. Right. That's with anything. I don't, you know what I'm saying? When you feel that you, you know, like you practice for track, cheer, whatever the case may be, you're like, oh, I'm good. I beat that and I won that. So I don't need to practice as much. But you need to practice even more because once you get to the top, right? It's harder to stay there. It's harder to stay there, right? So you always have to continue.
SPEAKER_01Or like, what's that saying? You're only as good as like for like you were just saying, like you're in track, like you're only as good as your last race. So it all is you're working, like you grinding all the time.
SPEAKER_00All the time, you're grinding all the time. So what that happens is we got comfortable, but we had a shakeup.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00When that shakeup came, you know, we were like, okay, we end, and that was in 2025, right? So that shakeup began. Right. So that then kind of said, Oh, how y'all gonna appear? How are you going to stand? How are you going to do, right?
SPEAKER_01Exactly. And not gonna lie, like we mentioned before, like fear got got us. I mean, like, we I know for me, like I said, I was crippled by fear. I it's still a work in progress, but you know, lately, mom and I just recently started like a 40-day challenge, and we're like day, I don't even know what day we're in right now, but yeah, we're doing, we're just in it, and I can already tell, like, okay, things are getting lifted. Okay, my mind is getting a little bit quiet. My my body is starting to like, okay, chill out. Because I felt like I was in fight or flight mode like 24-7. And it was just like I couldn't rest, couldn't sleep. I was just all over the place. But now, you know, like praise God, that we're just going through, like we said, that 40-day challenge. And it's just like, thank you, God. I'm starting to see the light. I'm starting to feel a little bit lighter. But you know what?
SPEAKER_00We recognize, and I think that again, that recon we're recognizing okay, something's off. Something's attacking us, right? And that enemy comes so quick sometimes, right? That he attacks us at our weakest moment and he knows that weakest moment. So, you know how some people know your weakness, right? And then they will come to use it against you. That's just how the enemy comes in, right, y'all. So you have to always be on guard, right? Always on guard. And so that's what we were saying is, you know, sometimes our guard comes down because we got into relaxation mode, right?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, because like I said, we were just coasting. Well, I was. I don't I'm not gonna speak for my mind.
SPEAKER_00Well, you know, I I was kind of like, oh, everything's fine, everything's good, and you know, it was cool, but the fear is the spirit, the spirit of fear, right up on us again after all the things we had experienced last year. Right. I mean, that's real talk. Um, and then what we had to kind of say is, you know, hold tight. Because we're not fighting properly or we're not winning at this properly. So we need to do something drastically, exactly, right, to shake it up even more. Yeah. Um, and so when you guys kind of look at things and you see that something's off or something is going on, right? And something you're like, okay, I got to figure this whole thing out. I got to go and I got to do something that works for me. Exactly. So what we did is a 40-day challenge. And in that challenge, every day we're doing something differently. You know, if we start off on Monday, we're doing communion. Right. You know, we're recognizing of what he, what God or Jesus has done for us, right? So we remember that. Then on day two, we're sitting here, okay, um, on scripture, right? We're journaling. Right. Then on day three, what we're doing there is we're kind of saying one and a half hours, right, of complete silence, spending time with God, understanding God, hearing, you know, what we need to do, and you know, listening. Then on day four, we're kind of just still operating in that uh doing our devotionals, and then day five, we're at just doing the same thing.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00And uh we're standing on scripture.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, that's the most important thing. I think what's really helped us a lot is one, the communion. All remembering what he paid for. And then two, especially just um standing on our scripture. We've been standing on Psalm ninety one. That has been our go to. We have been standing strong in it. And it has definitely just brought us so much peace and you know, just comfort and knowing like the Lord, He protects us. He's our great, He's our fortress, you know, He's our refuge, He's our safety. So I think just always just, you know, I think that's what we always get from the sermons that we listen to a lot is just get that one scripture. What?
SPEAKER_00And and Psalms 91. So, y'all, if y'all haven't had an opportunity, I I I I suggest. Oh, and it's real, it's short, like 16 verses, I think. It's 16. But then make it personal.
SPEAKER_01Make it personal.
SPEAKER_00And it's always about putting yourself into when he's talking to you. Right. Because this is the comfort and the joy and the strength that you can receive and the protection. Because it it says one thing that I really love. It says the plague by day. You know, nothing will come to your tent. Tent.
SPEAKER_01Oh my gosh, yes.
SPEAKER_00You know, and so when we're dealing with this spirit of fear, right, we're now kind of knocking it down, knocking it down, continuously knocking it down.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, with that word. And like I said, sometimes I would have trouble sleeping because I said the spirit of fear. When we say the spirit of fear, it's not necessarily like, you know, the natural fear of like heights or roller coasters, like stuff like that. But the sphere that's like, oh my God, I have anxiety. Oh my god, panic, or like you losing sleep, like that. That um spirit. Yeah, so on Psyme 91, it says, I will not fear the terror of night. Say it, Deja. That is my that is my favorite part, is like, I will not fear the terror of night. So to me, I made it just like my own, like, okay, I don't have to be afraid to go to period.
SPEAKER_00Correct. And and then at the end it says, with long life, that's what he's gonna satisfy me with. Right. So when you guys did Because he's so good. Because he's so good like that, and because of his salvation, that's all we have, right? And we we talk about this and we kind of put it into that because this is how we are navigating. This is today. Right now, back six years ago, if you would have asked me this, I would have been in worry, fear, listen here. All over the place. I would have been I don't even know what I would have been doing. As a matter of fact, it wouldn't be doing this, right? Um it wouldn't be doing the scripture, exactly. It wouldn't have not been showing up this way. So that is what over this time and how the season and how these changes and what we needed to do happened and how we look at things today, y'all. I am completely.
SPEAKER_01We were just saying this morning, like we're just so grateful, like the way that we've just been in the word because some things just you know, just circumstances of life, just in general, like thank you, God, that we respond differently. Because it's easy to respond in fear, it's easy to respond in worry, it's easy to respond in doubt. But what about we choose like the fruit of the spirit? Love, joy, peace, kindness, you know, gentleness, you know, self-control. Like, how about we respond in that way? And those are the attributes right and those Jesus Christ.
SPEAKER_00That is the attributes of Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit that lives in you, so we do have a choice we can make every day, single day to lean in on those fruits of the spirit and to be able to respond differently. I I for real, when I look at my when I look at myself today, I I am humbled. Right. I'm very humbled. I am grateful. I operate in gratitude every moment, right, y'all, because I am just that's all I can say. Grateful. Yeah. And I I come to tears sometimes because you know, when you think about what he's done and where he's brought you from and where he continuously is taking me and taking Deja, I am so excited about what is to come.
SPEAKER_01But nothing but the goodness of God, the grace of God, you know what I mean? And like you said, who even knew? Like you said, six years ago, where you would be today. Like, thank you, God. Like I said, I I mean my own thinking, like I thought my life would be completely different. However, I wouldn't choose it any other way. Because when you follow just the Lord, oh my gosh.
SPEAKER_00Things will start to lift. I feel lighter. Yeah, I feel lighter. Yeah. Now, have we arrived? Absolutely not. Um, are we still a work in progress? Absolutely.
SPEAKER_01Like we just said, we we went through freedom, thought we was good in three three years ago. You see where we're at three years now? We are still over here, like, oh Lord, oh my god.
SPEAKER_00Fear, fear, the spirit of fear comes upon you, and then whatever that is to you, or whatever you are going through, you know, we are saying change can happen, right? There are seasons, and when you recognize the change needs to happen, right, then you know there's a refining and you don't arrive just uh uh overnight. Right, it is a journey. It's always a journey, y'all. We want to leave you as we always do. Hopefully, this has brought you encouragement. Yes, y'all, encouragement to you uplifting because just to see and and to understand that you know there is seasons that you go through. Right. And through it's okay. It's okay. You are going to make it. Yes, you are making it, you are winning. Yeah, you are thriving.
SPEAKER_01You are victorious, you're not the victim, you're the victory.
SPEAKER_00Yes. So we want to leave you with this uh final scripture, Ecclesiastics three, verse one. There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.
SPEAKER_01Amen. Amen. Hope you guys enjoyed. Thank you. See ya. Bye.