Integrity vs Desire: Why We Ignore Red Flags and Stay Anyway | Ep. 111

In this episode of Cup Of Conversation Podcast, Tee and Coco get real about integrity, relationships, morals, money, emotional intelligence, dating standards, and surviving in today’s economy. From the Kevin Hart roast controversy and celebrity culture to cheating, social media addiction, respect in relationships, and the pressure of modern life, this conversation dives deep into the everyday choices between morals vs desires.

The ladies unpack hard truths about relationships, accountability, emotional maturity, and why so many people sacrifice self-respect just to feel wanted. They also discuss women’s standards in dating, cheating culture, emotional intelligence in men and women, threesomes, modern dating expectations, social media influence, and the struggle to maintain integrity in a world driven by money and status.

As the conversation evolves, Tee and Coco break down the reality of inflation, the middle class disappearing, survival in today’s economy, financial stress, Black family dynamics, self-sufficiency, and whether morals can survive desperation. This episode blends relationship talk, social commentary, self-awareness, and unfiltered podcast conversation in a way only Cup Of Conversation can.

Topics Discussed:

Integrity vs desires
Morals in relationships
Cheating and accountability
Kevin Hart roast reaction
Celebrity culture and selling out
Emotional intelligence in men and women
Dating standards and modern relationships
Women sacrificing respect for love
Social media addiction and self-awareness
Financial struggles and today’s economy
Middle class disappearing
Black community conversations
Self-sufficiency and survival mindset
Modern dating culture
Relationships and emotional maturity

If you enjoy deep conversations, relationship podcasts, Black culture discussions, social commentary, self-improvement talks, and real unfiltered opinions, make sure to LIKE, COMMENT, SUBSCRIBE, and join the conversation.

#CupOfConversationPodcast #Relationships #DatingPodcast #Integrity #ModernDating #BlackCulture #EmotionalIntelligence #KevinHart #PodcastClips #RelationshipAdvice #WomenAndDating #Cheating #SocialMedia #SelfAwareness #MoneyTalk #MiddleClass #BlackPodcast #HoustonPodcast #RelationshipTalk #MentalHealth

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Like, you can get your ass out of my baby bed. I don't think that equates to emotional intelligence. I think that equates to I'm just gonna do what the fuck I wanna do.

SPEAKER_01 0:11

I'm always going too damn fast right now. We're going too fast. Somebody pump the brakes.

SPEAKER_00 0:16

Put them a fuck nigga or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For something. Some men they not. If I ain't gay, I'm not having a threesome with a man. I don't care how happy it's gonna make you. You get what I'm saying? So I'm not getting pegged.

SPEAKER_01 0:27

I'm not blaming nobody. But I'm blaming somebody. Right. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 0:32

That's why I'm saying them off.

SPEAKER_01 0:48

What's up, everybody? Welcome back to another cup of conversation.

SPEAKER_00 0:52

Where we have conversations worth having.

SPEAKER_01 0:54

I'm your girl T.

SPEAKER_00 0:55

And I'm your girl Coco.

SPEAKER_01 0:56

And welcome to episode 110. Right? No, no, 111. 111. I'll be driving the boat today. So let's get right into it. You know, what we're gonna call it when we like lead the episode. Like, because our our um audience are our sippers. So we gotta be the ones that's filling a cup, because we are cup of cup of conversation. So what are we the servers?

SPEAKER_00 1:22

The I'll be your waiter today. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 1:26

The servers, the bartenders, the the baristas. The baristas, like like a coffee, you know, because that's the kind of cups we're feeling. We ain't we ain't filling you up with toxins at the bar, okay? No bartending. This is this is filling you with some healing. So I'm gonna be y'all baristas. I like barista tea. And we're gonna start off the first segment. We're going back to segments. I know, I know. Y'all probably like these bitches all over the world. Anyways, our how you feeling, how you dealing segment is gonna go into the topic of the day, which is gonna be integrity and integrity versus desires, and you know, picking that every day, making that everyday decision. Um, so I'm gonna start off my how you feeling, how you dealing, with questions that you tell me if you would pick um your desires or your morals on this one. So that's kind of like the Okay. You know, where are you going with this? Are you dealing with this morally or desire? Yeah. So the first question is how do you feel about the cheating friend? Desire to keep the friend or morally. Morally. Morally. How you how you change it?

SPEAKER_00 2:39

Um I give you one, I give you one time to um cheat, I guess. I guess I'll say mistake, whatever the mistake is. Yeah. Give you one time, hold you accountable, and and when I mean hold you accountable, I want to see changed behavior. Either it's not me, but I feel like a person that is will cheat on somebody that loves them the way that your your spouse or your partner usually does, is a person that does not show good character. So I'm always gonna go with morals, morals for cheating because to hurt somebody deeply like that, you don't give a fuck about life.

SPEAKER_01 3:12

I agree. I I definitely agree like that. It it has something to say about your character and what you would lie about. You just might be lying for nothing. Right. Um, would you sell out and do something that's against your morals for life-changing money for your family?

SPEAKER_00 3:28

Um I'm not gonna sell out uh so I'm gonna do morals with that one too. Only because I don't feel like nothing is really life-changing with money, even even with money uh being like uh billions of dollars or whatever, I feel like it's gonna be a price that comes with that too.

SPEAKER_01 3:45

Yeah. So it's like I'm gonna pay a price either way. It always is. Okay, and lastly, have you ever judged someone for something you secretly do yourself? Ooh. So is your morals spilling over to your gossip and your your your judgment?

SPEAKER_00 4:03

Have I ever judged somebody for something that I secretly did myself? I don't think I have. I'm trying to think about whether could I have judged somebody that I really do. Maybe like telling somebody business, and I'm gonna be I didn't tell somebody business before.

SPEAKER_01 4:22

I can tell you when you do. What? We talk about I do it too. We talk about uh social media a lot and people having a lot of scroll time. And we be on our phones a lot. Yeah. We we we we cast out a little, but I think we do kind of put ourselves into the thing, into the mix, but I don't think people know since we talking like about the situation at hand that we do it as much as we do.

SPEAKER_00 4:46

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 4:46

And I think we talk about it just because we do we know, like, it ain't just consuming y'all, it's consuming us too. Like, yeah, we feel it. Like oh, yeah, definitely. Okay. So that's one of the things I feel like I know I do for sure. I always talk about these phones and social media, and then you go see a post for me in 36 minutes, like 36 minutes ago. She just posted. So, yeah. But to get into our main topic, what brought me to the the conversation of integrity is the Kevin Hart roast. A lot of people had like opinions about the um, it well, it doesn't necessarily have to do with the roast itself. A lot of people had opinions about the commentary on the roast, but most of the opinions were towards the um black comedians and people that sat around and you know didn't stand up and Will Smith that moment. Go up there and slap the shit out of somebody. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 5:35

Right, right, right.

SPEAKER_01 5:36

We need to, we we gotta do, we gotta start doing some of these things again. So um that's where a lot of the like backlash was coming. And it just got me to thinking, like, wow, what amount of money, or we in this space, so you know, we get to we start moving on up, you know, we make it to the black effect podcast, we make it to this event, that event. Well, at what point do we get to where they're offering us money to let white people disrespect your culture in front of you, and you be okay with it. And I know it's in the like they say, it's in the the um sense of comedy. It's supposed to be funny, it's supposed to be, you know, entertainment. Entertainment, it's not supposed to be politically correct or um taken seriously. But um, I mean, if bottom line, if it's not funny, it's not funny. And and if it can affect somebody um emotionally, like, I just don't think that we should be taking it there. And I think that a lot of people think that this time is too sensitive. Do you agree with that rhetoric or to a certain extent? I do, yeah. I do agree. I do too. Because I feel like, oh, like you said the other day when we were talking about this old comedy, would have been canceled for a lot of this. But you gotta also pay attention, just like we have a responsibility in front of these mics to pay attention to the time and the climb that we in, to not be out here saying derogatory words that might offend somebody or something like that. So first, why do you my first question, I know you didn't see it, but why do you think it's so easy for celebrities to fold like that and not stand up for the things that's going on that we actively everybody knows is going on, but kind of ignore it so they can be in the rooms with the people who are on the other side of these things?

SPEAKER_00 7:24

I would I would say money, but then I when I was thinking about answering this question, I thought about it, and it's not even I don't even think it's money because I've also seen where so many celebrities have lost money for doing derogatory saying, you know, things. Yeah. So I wouldn't even say it's money. I think it's a level of what stand for anything or fall. I mean, stand for something or fall for anything type of thing. Right. It's like you said that moral compass, like that thing to where won't anything won't change you, like money won't change you. Uh relationships with people won't change you. Um, I I think you just gotta have it. It's just one of them things that you just not willing to budge on, type of thing. Um, I don't I don't know what it is. You just it's it's just either in you, like they say, it's either in you or it ain't.

SPEAKER_01 8:11

So you think that like um the Kevin Hart's and the Tiffany Haddishes, you don't think it was about the money. You think it's more of I personally, for me, I think a lot of us have not um, once we get to the money, a lot of us have not realized that we haven't dealt with the trauma of just being black and trying to be accepted.

SPEAKER_00 8:35

Um I think I think that money can play a part in it, but I feel like so many people have also shown you ways to get money without like bowing down to that.

SPEAKER_01 8:47

Right, but no, I'm saying as if a black person trying to be accepted into the American society, which mean would mean accepting proximity to whiteness, yeah, proximity to white, accepting everybody, you know, being cool with everybody. Um, that means especially proximity to whiteness, that means to not uh have your emotional guard up so much, not be so sensitive. To be able to fit in spaces, exactly. And what's crazy is in my job, one of my um coworkers was kind of that's the advice that they were trying to give me. Like, you know, oh you just can't be so sensitive about the situation. You gotta let it roll off your shit. And I'm saying that's easy for you to say because you're not the only black girl in here. You just saying this on the other side of the wall, and you're not you don't even know what I'm talking about. The sun isn't not even shining on that side. Right, right. You are in the dark, you have no clue of what I'm talking about. So I feel like it's very insensitive for people to try to act like the problems just don't exist or act like people are being too emotional or I think too, sometimes people don't have the words to say about certain things.

SPEAKER_00 9:56

And sometimes, quite frankly, some people have not thought about certain things to have the words to say right until it's they in a situation to where okay, we looking for some words from you. Like, you know what I'm saying? So sometimes I think it's part of it is that. Um, and sometimes we we experience a lot of things that we don't really have feel away about it because I I know that I've been a victim of this. Like, you know how you going through so much that certain stuff you don't really know how you feel about it, because it's like I could give two fucks about it. Right, right, right. You know what I'm saying? Like, so I think that sometime and I know like I remember you telling me yesterday that uh Tiffany Haddish had said she didn't remember or recall the joke. Like, so I I'm not saying that she doesn't, but I'm saying that it could be possible that you got to the end of the thing and really was tuned out to the fact that you know you almost predicted.

SPEAKER_01 10:51

I mean, it was a two almost three-hour show. Right. Like, and he did a five, eight-minute set or something like that. So in the bigger scheme of things, I can admit to saying that like um it's been times where I've taken on things that I thought I was should have been mad at. Like, that shit should have pissed you off. But whole time it didn't. Well, really didn't. Like, it you know what I'm saying? And I don't think enough people analyze themselves to even realize that they're doing that. And that's where social media, that's why social media and like not knowing yourself and just not not really even, it don't even, it's not even about knowing yourself because I'm still learning too, but having the tools to say, like, okay, let me think about why why I felt like this.

SPEAKER_00 11:35

And I and I take an example, I should give you an example of one thing that I didn't feel nothing about, and people was going in, and I was like, oh, should I feel some way about this? The lady that been viral on uh social media that uh poured water on her son and her girlfriend, yeah, I've seen and how she kicked out and was like, we can go home like this or whatever. At first I was like, Yeah, get your ass out of my baby bed. Naked, like, yeah, I don't care how I'm talking to you right now. And then when I was like, I started reading the comments, and people was like, as a woman, as a mother, you should have maybe rolled her, got her in the car, rolled her home. And then I started being like, damn, I'm a colorless bitch, because I don't feel no type of way about how she just I was like that at first too, but the comments didn't change my mind.

SPEAKER_01 12:17

It was how hard she kept on going. Like at the beginning of the video, I was like, hell yeah. But she like as it started going on and she bitched this bitch, I was like, The only thing that I would.

SPEAKER_00 12:27

You know what it sounds like you fucking him and not that's not you know, you know it sounds the only thing that I did say about that situation, I felt like she wasn't as mad at him as she was her.

SPEAKER_01 12:37

Right. The way she went back and was like, bro, bro, hold on, she was just a bitch. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. For something, like she not the only one who did so, baby, yo, yo.

SPEAKER_00 12:47

But the part that triggered me, I guess, too, that I was with her for a minute was because it's like you don't have no regard. Like, not only is you fucking in my kid's bed, but like you got too comfortable and went to sleep. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like you just saying fuck me. Really?

SPEAKER_01 13:01

That's how I really going to sleep is crazy.

SPEAKER_00 13:04

Going to sleep naked, like you already sneaking doing this. Like, at least put your clothes back on. At least.

SPEAKER_01 13:10

Going to sleep naked is crazy. You too comfortable. Come on now. I done sneaked, I done had my sneaking and geek today. But going to sleep naked in a nigga house, you know, you ain't even supposed to be in is insane. It's insane.

SPEAKER_00 13:23

Like, come on.

SPEAKER_01 13:24

I didn't think she took it too far. I mean, I didn't think she um, I didn't think she was disrespectful to a certain extent. But like I said, at one point it started sounding like she was talking to her nigga and not her son.

SPEAKER_00 13:37

Exactly. But that's just an example of how sometimes you can not be a filly way and then some hear something and see something make you young.

SPEAKER_01 13:44

Yeah. So I hope y'all are self-aware of that. But we do talk in um third person, third person about like the perspective we want to be in a lot on this couch. So I feel like this conversation about morals and integrity will kind of like give people a little more insight of how we really think about things or if we carry these things out in life. Um, so the question that kind of came up as like the leader of this topic is are you loyal to your morals or just your desires? And then we're gonna start with relationships first, and then we'll kind of switch to a different way. Because you have to be integrity and you have to have morals across the line, like in different areas. So um, do you think men are more honest about their desires and women are more honest about um morality, or is that just like the stereotype that we kind of see in society?

SPEAKER_00 14:35

I think it's both. I think it's a stereotype, but I think it's very true because I feel like as a woman, you're you wanna be, you wanna be looked at as this uh very much wife ready.

SPEAKER_01 14:48

No, I I I'm morally correct. You know what I'm saying? I did this the right way.

SPEAKER_00 14:52

Right, yeah, and especially because we're up against so much of men not being that, that we have to prove like this is why you should be. I'm that like you of course you should be moral, like you should care about you have morals, you have integrity. Now don't cheat on, don't not cheat on me because of what I'm I'm gonna catch you. Don't cheat on me because that's who it is, that's who you are, that type of thing.

SPEAKER_01 15:11

So I think it's because it'll make you feel bad to see me like that or something. I don't know. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 15:15

I think women do operate more a lot more out of like their morals than the desires, and men operate out of I did that shit because I wanted to, like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 15:24

And I I really wish we would get a little more of that in our system. Because we really try to go with the status quo. We really try to, and for so long, that has like put us behind the A-ball. Men go for what they want, nothing more, nothing less. If they if you are with a man and he's putting up with your shit, it's because he wants you. It's not because, you know, he's as long as he down, he's gone. Yeah, exactly. Now, you do got them few men that, you know, got mommy issues and they feel like they gotta stay around just because they feel like that's stroking their ego or whatever.

SPEAKER_02 15:58

Right.

SPEAKER_01 15:59

But a real man is that is putting up that is taking the time for himself and going through his emotional journey, he's putting up with you because he wants to. Not because so I think we need to adopt some of them habits, ladies. Um, but do you think we confuse, do you think people confuse uh desire with value? Especially women.

SPEAKER_00 16:18

Explain that to me.

SPEAKER_01 16:19

Desire as in um, this is what I want. This is the uh, like you said earlier in the last episode, um, about the perception of what he could be instead of the value of what he is right now, seeing him for his efforts, his habits as he is, like where is he 50 cent? Is he a 50 cent nigga? Is he 99 cents?

SPEAKER_00 16:44

Like what what were we so you ask the question one more time?

SPEAKER_01 16:49

Do you think people can view confuse um desire with value? What they desire out of people.

SPEAKER_00 16:56

I think at a certain for a at a certain point, yes, and then I think no, because I feel like you you can see what you getting, and and it's and I feel like a lot of people are more willing to lie to themselves to have something or somebody than they are to just be honest about what they see and what they feel. I feel like sometimes you get a feeling of this ain't really for me, this ain't really what I should want, this ain't really all of what it's supposed to be, and you know it, and you just kind of you kind of shoe it away and you kind of find a reason to to stay and keep well keep whatever you have or whatever you want.

SPEAKER_01 17:32

I want to park right there for a second because I know that like in today's society, they're saying women are getting away from um less likely to marry, less likely to uh be um, well, they they say they're having babies in 30s and their 30s now instead of their early 20s. Why do you think that we have been, I'm glad that we're breaking the cycle, but why do you think that we have been so conditioned to just be the ones that make the right decisions? Like basically the ones that lead in a sense in a sense. Like they see us doing right and we hope they'll do right. Why do you think that that's been put on us?

SPEAKER_00 18:07

Well, I think if I'm not mistaken, if I'm not mistaken, I think historically, um, scientifically, I mean, um, we just happen to mature a lot faster than men.

SPEAKER_01 18:19

And I think that that's this could be the case when when uh a young lady messing with a grown, uh, old, like it's just like the mindset sometimes, if if they're not, if that's not in their environment, in their atmosphere, in their vicinity, some and not now that's not just for men, women too. People will stay in the that mindset or that skills.

SPEAKER_00 18:40

It goes back to what you just said though. It goes back to what you just said about how we are conditioned to do things more morally correct. I think that, and and also because women are more accepting of that things. Also, how you just said men only go for what they want. Yeah. Women go for um and I know you talked about um last time we talked about um historically men are always treating women a certain way. I think it just goes back to all of those things. Um women are more accepting of the bullshit than men are. If you cheat with his homeboy, he's nowhere near taking you back. He's not gonna be with you. But if he cheat with your homegirl, it's a possibility that you may stay. And so I think that just the behaviors of women being more so accept accepting of things, um that's kind of how things happen. Like, you know, that's just kind of the way of the world because I'm willing to accept this, I'm willing to get away with more things. You know what I'm saying? So I think men are kind of like kids where you you if as long as you are willing to not say nothing.

SPEAKER_01 19:46

You don't start whooping that ass. They're gonna keep on. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 19:49

So I think it's one of them type of things.

SPEAKER_01 19:50

But what is that okay? Being that women are naturally the more emotional and intelligent ones, what does that say about our character as a whole or our DNA emotionally that we can know that and still allow these things, like it still allow the red flag, still allow the potential to come into our life. Like, what does that say?

SPEAKER_00 20:17

I don't believe that women are more um emotionally intelligent than men. I don't I don't think women are at a at a at a advanced rate to being more emotionally intelligent than men. You don't? I don't believe that. The I will say, I will say that I believe that women are more in tune with their emotions. But being in tune with your emotions and being emotionally intelligent is two different things.

SPEAKER_01 20:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 20:42

So I think that we are all, when it comes to men and women, I feel like we're about right here when it comes to being emotionally intelligent. I think that's it.

SPEAKER_01 20:52

They don't know what to do afterwards. Right.

SPEAKER_00 20:55

Like you can you can say almost kind of like, yeah, I I can communicate that, yeah, you heard me when you don't answer your phone. This isn't that. Where your phone at? Why you ain't been calling me, why you ain't called me back, all of those things. But you know, that's being aware of my emotions. It's letting you know that I'm a I'm telling you how I feel, but how you handle it is not with emotional intelligence. Right. So I think that we are equally here, which is a why we got a lot of back and forth because it's neither one of us know how to dead it. We don't know how to come to a resolve, we don't know how to work together. Like that's why we in this back and forth all the time. So I think that it's just a matter of men, some men got it, and some women got it, and some men don't, and some women don't.

SPEAKER_01 21:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:37

I don't think that we have it more. I think we just more, we express more through emotion than men.

SPEAKER_01 21:43

I feel like they hold their boundary up better, though. You know what I mean? When I say emotional intelligence, I mean like we know we don't like this, and we got a boundary for this. If if a man don't like this, he ain't gonna, like we just said, he ain't gonna put up with it.

SPEAKER_00 21:57

But I don't be I don't think that equates to emotional intelligence. I think that equates, so I'm just gonna do what the fuck I want to do.

SPEAKER_01 22:02

Okay, okay.

SPEAKER_00 22:03

Yeah, I a little bit of a noise. But not because nine times out of ten. Free will all yeah, because nine times out of ten, most men, even when they don't want to do something, it could be something like, nigga, you need to be doing it. You need to be staying with your kids. No, I don't want to do it. Cause you get what I'm saying? So it don't be emotional intelligence. It'd be just that that I don't feel like it. I ain't doing it. It don't feel good to me in this moment. So I and I think women act like that too, you know, in a sense, if they don't have it, all of the emotional intelligence that they need. They're gonna react in a way that, yeah, you might be sad right now, but to go slice out his tires or to go crash out, that doesn't mean, you get what I'm saying? Just because you were able to show your emotion doesn't mean that you're doing it in a healthy way.

SPEAKER_01 22:48

So do you think that women are lacking morals when it comes to holding them to those certain standards that we hold that we say we want? Or integrity by keeping our word to ourselves and saying that part integrity.

SPEAKER_00 23:06

Because you can have the morals and the integrity is to act on those morals.

SPEAKER_01 23:10

Right, right. I definitely agree. And I um my last question in my main topic was would you uh would some people rather feel wanted than respected? That kind of goes to that morals versus integrity thing. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 23:24

Well what Betty Rice said, having a piece of man is better than having a no man at all. And I think that uh a lot of women and and to be honest, a lot of women want men so much because they value men and what they bring to the table so much that they're willing to sacrifice a little piece of whatever they wanted or respect to get it. Like you said um before, the woman was like, I believe, you know, every man gonna cheat, just gonna let them do have a little one night, you know. And even like with threesomes and stuff, I think a lot of times women do that for the thrill of pleasing the man, like, oh, he's gonna desire me even more. I'm that bitch that gave him what another one wouldn't, or you know, what somebody else might deem inappropriate, or you know, I just think that it's all we always yeah, we always willing to sacrifice our morals and our respect for a man or for a relationship. And it's and some men, they not. If I ain't gay, I'm not having a threesome with a man. I don't care how happy it's gonna make you. You feel what I'm saying? So I'm not getting pegs. I'm not getting whatever the thing is, I think that men, they just stand on whether it's right or wrong, they stand on it.

SPEAKER_01 24:31

Yeah. And I'm glad, I'm really glad that we're starting to put our foot down. I know that we're gonna, you know, slow the population rate down by not having babies. But I am glad some of y'all host starting to put y'all foot down because the the picking that was going on, I'm not blaming nobody. But I'm blaming somebody. Right. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm just as much as they are responsible, so are y'all. Um, but to slide into our last sip, since we talked about integrity in relationships, I want to talk about integrity because not everybody might, everybody might not be desiring a relationship. But this is one thing that everybody desire, and it's some money.

SPEAKER_02 25:05

Right.

SPEAKER_01 25:05

And I think that's where a lot of integrity gets lost. That's why we're even here, because we're talking about the Kevin Hart roast, and you know, that's what brought up the thought of the conversation. Because they think, I mean, a lot of people, like you said, this when I told you about this, a lot of people been checked out, especially our people, been checked out from Kevin. We've been thought that he, you know. Well he left his wife, we stole his soul, and and you know, Kanye said it best. They get to the and Lee, yeah, as for a white girl. So, like, we we we know that. We know that about him. But I think it's more people that that are like him that a lot of people just kind of like shoo under the rug because they ain't as big as him. Um, but financially, we're talking about morals and integrity here. Would you uh would your morals survive desperation? Like if it was down to I need the money. To do what? To do whatever you gotta do.

SPEAKER_00 26:01

Like, would your morals like see me personally, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say I'm I'm not going down by no money. Like, money to me personally, like I like money and I and I love the things that money can afford. But from experience of others and some of myself, money is not all it's cracked up to be. I feel like. I feel like you know how people say the root of the money is the root of all evil and stuff like that. I kind of believe that. I feel like um I would never want to be friends. I said I told my husband this, and um, we we kind of had a back and forth about this, but I told him I would never want to be friends with a billionaire. Why? Because I feel like to get that because we we gotta think about what billions is.

SPEAKER_01 26:46

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 26:46

To get that level of money, yeah, you have to do it.

SPEAKER_01 26:49

You had to.

SPEAKER_00 26:51

I just not I'm just not willing to believe that it's a billionaire in this world that has not done something. Traded something. Traded something. And I just I I always say that I just want to live a comfortable life, like whatever that looks like. I want to live a comfortable life because I don't want to do whatever it takes to get to certain amounts of money.

SPEAKER_01 27:09

Okay. So it don't have to be overly, you said comfortable because I have to express this all the time when she try to talk about like, um, oh, I don't want to join the hustle and bustle of America and blah, blah, blah. But then you gotta ask somebody for money to help you pay your rent because you didn't decide to free will for five days out the week. Like, we gotta, come on now. You know what I'm saying? So when people, I feel like a lot of people when they when they're talking about stuff like that, they're not thinking about the um how they actually want to live. Like, how are you willing to, what are you willing, what's comfortable to you? Like, are you willing to some people take it as far as sleeping out of van, you know what I'm saying? Like, or are you willing to, you know, apartment it for the rest of your life? Or are you you do you want to buy a house? Do you want, what are what are what are you willing, like, what's your lowest you willing to go? And what's the highest you want to reach? And like, are you do you feel like you doing enough to be in that medium?

SPEAKER_00 28:05

I feel like yeah, because I feel like I am, because I feel like mine always changes. I can be, I can live in a tiny home. I can live, I think that my thing is not so much of a material obtaining thing, it's an experience more than anything. So I feel like you can obtain, you can have obtain a experience anywhere. Not anywhere, but like just as long as I feel like as long as I have my husband and my kid, we have a roof over our head, that roof can be big. But it's like, are we able to experience certain things? Like, you know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_01 28:41

So it's like I'm like 50-50 on this, and I'm not gonna sit here and actually try to say the morally correct the right answer.

SPEAKER_02 28:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 28:49

I um have been the type of person that will stay in a uh like a bachelor pad type of house. I ain't gotta have too much of my apartment. We got a couch and a motherfucker, we got a TV, you know what I'm saying? You already know my house ain't decorated, decorated. But now that I'm getting older and noticing, oh, people have these little things for convenience, comfortability, you know, the all this little stuff, it look good in here, but it makes this a functional space. Right. That shit costs money. What are we talking about? Like, like to live comfortably costs money, especially in this economy. Like, I know we all, everybody always says this is the worst economy we've ever been in. I truly believe it can't get no worse than this. Like, if we almost uh people making like $60 an hour, who who needs to make $60 an hour to fucking be able to live a regular life? You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 29:37

Like, who needs to be like I don't know because I'm just sitting here thinking, like I know, and I've been thinking this. I've been thinking this for a while, and I've been very afraid to say it because I didn't know what was gonna come with it. But I don't I don't feel the like I do, I do. I don't want to sound like I I'm not aware of what's going on. I feel the the feeling of like this is the worst economy ever we lived in with things being expensive, but I don't really feel like I'm to the point to where I'm like down and like can't get what I want. Like I've I I don't know. You get what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_01 30:17

Not yet, not yet. I I don't wanna I hope it don't get there, but we still have to make it a lot of people.

SPEAKER_00 30:20

But like even, yeah, like I feel like I just pray, you know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_01 30:24

I'm praying. But we are still we're pretty bad right now.

SPEAKER_00 30:27

Like we are, but what I'm saying is pretty fucked right now. What I'm saying is it's like I feel like we're gonna forever be like moving into a place of where we just gonna have to make more money to live the life we wanna live.

SPEAKER_01 30:42

And then that's just gonna be uh But at to what point? At what point is the ceiling? Because at some point of time back then today, like back in the days, there used to be a ceiling. It used to be all right, if we work and do this, we're gonna be able to own a house. No, no, that's not for us these days. I mean, whether we pay attention to it or not, whether you say it affects you or not, it is out there, it's happening. Yeah, that's why I say I know what it is out there. And it might not affect you now, but it'll it'll affect somebody you love or some maybe soon. Like it's a trickle-down thing, like that, like you just never know what the fuck is is what's what's happening next with this this administration.

SPEAKER_00 31:22

Like, and it's like I guess that I think you know, I and I think maybe I should think like this, but I think that whenever it's gonna get to the point to where it's gonna matter to me, maybe God'll just take me on home.

SPEAKER_01 31:35

I mean, I don't know. I'm stuck on because I don't want it to be today today.

SPEAKER_00 31:39

I don't want it to be today, but I just feel like I don't know if I'm I'm thinking about it right because I just really don't think like I don't know. Like I've experienced having certain amounts of money, and then I experience not having money, and it's like I really just believe the whole everyday take care of itself, like type of thing. Like, yeah, I think that life comes in cycles to where too, like some sometimes in life you don't you go without those comfortability things, and that's okay. Like you're not mad that you have to go through that. Like, I don't think that it's a world of where you live where you make all of this money and your life is consistently comfortable. Yeah, so I feel like whatever, like you say, right now, I'm comfortable, but I feel like, yeah, it might become a time where it's like, well, we don't, we don't, we don't go out and eat as much because we don't have the money, or we don't, we don't live in a bigger, a big house because the light bill is gonna be too high to be keeping that big house. And I think that I will be adjusted to being okay with that because trying to keep up would be more stress, anyways. So I just think that you just live in a life of cycles to where everything is not always gonna be what it's always gonna be. I get what you're saying.

SPEAKER_01 32:49

I'm just saying from the outside, looking like if you think about when they started, started trading for goods and people started paying for stuff, people making 50 cents for shit, people paying 30. Like, we are at a point where people, I just had to say it again, are trying to make have to make $60 an hour, $100, $200K a year. $100K a year is um it's middle class now. That is not feasible to keep going up. It's not some somebody gonna die off.

SPEAKER_00 33:20

Like, and that's kind of what they putting it. That's kind of somebody's gonna die off. And and that's really to be honest, why and think about it.

SPEAKER_01 33:27

How many people in your family ain't striving to be millionaires or try just people that you know ain't trying to be, you know. Like, I seen a video of a boy, he was being funny the other day. He was like, I'm the first motherfucker in my family that thought about owning something, getting some money. Like, I'm the first. Y'all just was gonna sit around like, well, this is what we got. And it's a lot of people sitting around like this is what we got. Like, so a lot of that's that this is what we got section, ain't gonna be able to make it past some of this.

SPEAKER_00 33:56

But that's like I feel like that's also the consequences of your behavior. Like, if you sitting around then and you see, like, I'm not I'm not saying that I'm sitting around like, well, that's the consequence of this this economy, right?

SPEAKER_01 34:09

But what I'm saying is have to pay for uh health care, like people, but people be sick, people be having mounds of debt shit they can't control.

SPEAKER_00 34:18

The only thing is to do is either move into a economy that's not this, or uh a thing that's not like this, a matrix that's not this, like they say, removing yourself from the matrix, or you get with the program of the matrix. Like, I get that you shouldn't have to. I get all of those things, but neither one of those are easy solutions, right? But what I'm saying is it's that's the that's the reality that we live in, though, right? Like, what do we do then? What's the alternative?

SPEAKER_01 34:47

We don't have one right now. We don't have a solution. I mean, like that's what we have to do. No, I know. I've been thinking that for since we got into this. Like, what's what is our next corrective action? Like, do we get to get this black? But what I'm saying is, I'm not saying that it's something we could change. I'm just saying that we're going to places that are unheard of right now.

SPEAKER_00 35:07

We're in a place that's unheard of right now.

SPEAKER_01 35:09

But we've been going. To shit that's that's getting astronomically unnecessary.

SPEAKER_00 35:14

But we're about to have to be millionaires to be middle class. But the thing about it is, he is we've always been going. How we're going even further, we've always been We're going too damn fast right now.

SPEAKER_01 35:24

We're going too fast. We are. Somebody pump the brakes.

SPEAKER_00 35:27

I agree. Shit. But don't let, I feel like just don't let that kind of stuff consume you because like. We have to have a balance of do something about it, but don't let it consume you to where you feel defeated because at the end of the day, the day gotta end. Like, I mean, I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 35:45

Look, I know you're saying that, but it's probably a TSA worker who finna end the day for real. And who finna end that bitch for good? Because they ain't got paid in the last three months.

SPEAKER_00 35:56

And look, and we we already live it check to check. Like, and you might be in a better place by doing that, sis. That's what I'm saying. I'm just saying, like, if if I'm not telling nobody, look, this is a disclaimer. I'm not telling nobody to off themselves at all, but in the least. But some days I I have thought about full out thought about that. It's gonna come a day where it's better to be in a place with the father. It's gonna come a time when it's just better to be there. And it's gonna, it's really gonna come a time to where the world is gonna be like you're gonna have to choose you believe you what you believe in and what you think is gonna happen versus what's really gonna happen. And you're gonna have to be like, you know what?

SPEAKER_01 36:35

I ain't gonna make it for my damn self. Hopefully, you can make it. Let him make it for me. Yeah. I don't hope to be. You know what I mean? Like, let him make it for me. I don't wanna have to be the author of that book right there. Like, no.

SPEAKER_00 36:49

I and and I and I hate to say it to you, but you know how I be thinking at times. Like, I really just kind of made up my mind that it's it is gonna come a time where everything ain't what it's supposed to be. And you're gonna do do what you gotta do. Yeah. And the only thing that I will advise I will give is to become um self-sufficient in starting back up how we started.

SPEAKER_01 37:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 37:13

Starting back up, get your land, get your um.

SPEAKER_01 37:16

That would be the closest thing we got to a solution.

SPEAKER_00 37:18

You don't gotta build no 2,000, 3,000 square foot house. You can get a tiny home, 400 squee. And that's the thing. I have come to terms with being okay with the bare minimum. Yeah. When it comes, it's gonna be a time in life where I'm gonna experience more than the bare minimum. You know what I'm saying? But it's gonna come a time where that might be my reality. And I have to be comfortable with that. I have to be comfortable with me and my husband and my child packing up and having a one-bedroom. Right. Because guess what? In a one-bedroom, we're not gonna be missing out on those. We got we're gonna have heat. Because think about it. When things happen, disasters happen, we be really at the bare minimum and we be fine. We be on Instagram, still kick in.

SPEAKER_01 37:54

Still gotta find the joy in it. And we do hurricanes happen, we on the road. Like, well, we're here, y'all.

SPEAKER_00 38:00

Yeah, we be all in one house. All family be in one house, and then we get a glimpse of what's good, and then we find we can't be, we can't live with each other. We can't, yeah, yeah. So I really to be honest, see, I've been preparing to be whatever the Lord may, whatever the government may, let it be. Because hey, if I gotta move back in with my brother, my mama, I've been doing that anyway. I mean, if we gotta be in one bedroom, if Corey gotta sleep in the bed with us, we do that in every same. Corey got home.

SPEAKER_01 38:26

We pile up at my mama's house all the time. Only thing we might need to start doing is learning how to garden, baby. We got a lot of we need some chickens or something. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 38:34

Yeah, it's gonna it's come a time for especially our people to take accountability and say, hey, it's some stuff we gotta do for ourselves.

SPEAKER_01 38:41

Yeah. We can't worry about what they do. Restore the power back to back to us.

SPEAKER_00 38:45

And if it starts with you and your family first, then that's where it might start and it'll trickle down. If not, oh well, hey. So morally, it ain't about the money, it's about being comfortable in your life and being okay with your situation. That's why I say I don't let the I don't let the economy really like, it ain't really started affecting me yet. But even when it did, like even when I think about when it did, when I didn't have the money that I needed. Oh, it don't affect me either. I'm speaking on behalf of people I hear about.

SPEAKER_01 39:14

Like listening to the radio, like I mean, it ain't affecting me, but I'm just listening to the radio. No, I'm talking about them. Oh, yeah, yeah. Don't let it affect you either.

SPEAKER_00 39:22

Like if you do what you do. If you gotta eat a tuna sandwich. Well, what'd you do when your son's at, home? Crying out. But but the thing about it, though, two and see, I ain't gonna lie. It hard as it is, it's easy though. Cause I think about I think about things like you, it ain't it don't take much to eat every day.

SPEAKER_01 39:42

Yeah. If you're more grateful, if you're more gracious for what you want to do.

SPEAKER_00 39:46

Even if you go, if you go and get uh a bag of rice, a bag of rice, you can get it for a dollar. A bag of beans, you can get it for a dollar. Yeah, that can feed you and your kids for at least three days.

SPEAKER_01 39:59

Yeah. You gotta be grateful for it. Two boxes of cornbread. Be grateful for what you got and what you can get, baby.

SPEAKER_00 40:04

So I'm not gonna never worry, baby, because as long as we got a bag of rice and some cornbread and some beans and we can grow the shit from the ground. I mean, what do we have to worry about?

SPEAKER_01 40:11

You eating like a slave.

SPEAKER_00 40:12

Hey, what is it good or not?

SPEAKER_01 40:15

We're going back to it.

SPEAKER_00 40:16

Is it good or not? Isn't red beast good when you're going back to it.

SPEAKER_01 40:20

Except we're owning us this time. Ain't nobody owning us.

SPEAKER_00 40:23

Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 40:24

Hey, don't worry about this shit. This was a good conversation. I hope we gave y'all something to think about. Filled your cup, you know, Tita Barista today.

SPEAKER_00 40:31

Fill it all the way up, and we'll see y'all next week. Bam. Bye, Car, get this on the record. Bye. Okay.